Capitol Punishment 2011
Date: June 19, 2011
Location: Verizon Center, Washington D.C.
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Jerry Lawler
Time for another B show PPV. The main events are Orton vs. Christian III and Cena vs. Truth for the titles. This has a bit of a better feel to it than Over the Limit, but I’m not sure if that’s going to be enough to carry them to a better result. At least the main event is fresh and the other one has been well built. Can’t ask for much more than that. Let’s get to it.
The opening video is about Truth and his alleged conspiracy complete with videos of various other scandals and conspiracies in Washington DC, such as Clinton and Nixon.
The set is pretty cool looking as it looks like the Capitol Building.
US Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler
The red white and blue ropes are a nice touch. These two have had so many matches that it’s hard for them to not have a decent match. Kofi goes into his usual controlled frenzy (coming soon to a t-shirt near you) but the kick misses. Dolph takes over with his basic stuff. Dropkick takes Kofi down as we make Vickie is fat jokes. We hear about Dolph at Kent State because we haven’t heard about that in a few minutes. Kofi gets a cradle for a quick two and that’s about it for this run on offense.
Off to an armbar by Dolph and there’s the sleeper but Kofi gets out of it rather quickly. Kofi starts his series of strikes and takes over. He hits a cross body to the back which is kind of weird but whatever. Boom Drop hits and he loads up Trouble in Paradise which misses, but he does grab the SOS for two. Both guys get rollups for two and the Zig Zag doesn’t work. Kofi gets something like a double stomp for two.
Up to the corner they go with Dolph trying a superplex. Kofi knocks him off and hits the huge cross body which always looks awesome but it only gets two here. Another SOS is countered into the Sleeper which is countered again. Trouble in Paradise and the Zig Zag miss but Vickie rakes the eyes of Kofi and there’s the Sleeper in the middle of the ring. Dolph kicks off the ropes to get them back into the middle of the ring and somehow that’s all cool and Dolph is champion. Well of course not as that would mean consistency in the rules. Dolph Ziggler is a freaking Triple Crown Champion.
Rating: B-. The ending was a bit confusing as they took too long to announce the winner. Also the ropes aspect was pretty stupid since Dolph touched them which is usually grounds for a break, but here it’s not because that goes against the planned finish. Good match though as these two know each other so well so it was a big match of counters and avoiding finishers, which is always fun.
Truth arrives with the title and says that he’s going to a party and Josh is invited. They walk around and Truth runs into Eve who says she doesn’t know him anymore. He goes all psycho and dedicates the upcoming win to all the little Jimmys and Jennys.
Miz is tired of hearing about Riley. He won the world title and he won in the main event of Wrestlemania while Riley was carrying the briefcase. There’s a line between them and tonight he’s going to prove that. Serious but good stuff here.
We recap Miz vs. Riley. It’s the classic mentor/mentee feud with them being all cool until Miz lost the title, which made him blame Riley when things started going downhill. Riley technically cost Miz the title twice and Riley snapped and massacred Miz a few times on Raw, setting up this match.
The Miz vs. Alex Riley
Miz has the case with him now and actually comes out first. The balloons saying AWESOME are back which are a nice touch. Riley is the hometown boy so he’s pretty well received. Cole goes into full on Miz is AWESOME mode, cheering for everything he says and bashing Riley completely. Miz talks trash and Riley hammers away. Riley chases him for a bit but charges into a big boot to give Miz the advantage.
The beating begins and Riley is in trouble. Miz keeps backing away from the punches Riley tries to throw and keeps the advantage. Low DDT gets two. Miz likes to throw boots. Other than that quick opening Riley has gotten beaten pretty badly here. Riley gets a shoulder into the corner but a second hits the post. About the 10th big boot of the match puts Riley down outside.
Miz more or less stalks him and lets Riley miss punch after punch. One of them finally hits and here’s the comeback. And scratch that as Miz grabs a chinlock and brings Riley right back down. Corner clothesline by Miz as Riley is in big trouble. Double axe off the top by Miz hits which is a pretty rare sight. Riley goes into the Tree of Woe as King praises him for his ability to punch.
Booker keeps calling for the match to be stopped but Riley gets out of the way of a charging Miz to send Miz’s balls into the post ala Curt Hennig. Riley hits a spear and takes over. I’m so over that move it’s unreal. Spinebuster gets two. Miz sends him to the floor, only for Riley to get in another shot for two.
Out to the floor we go as Cole runs his mouth even more. Riley finally has had enough of him and there goes Cole. Miz gets all ticked off and gets the briefcase which of course doesn’t get him anymore. Riley grabs an inverted DDT (Edgecution) and gets the clean pin on the Miz. Never would have seen that one coming at all.
Rating: C+. Rather surprised here as Miz would have seemed to be the pick to win this one. Either way you can’t say that they’re not trying to push someone else. I can’t imagine this is the end of the feud and I hope it isn’t, as Miz and Riley have an actual feud between them which helps a lot.
Sgt. Slaughter is in the back with….oh let’s just get it over with. It’s a bad Obama impersonator and he makes Obamacare jokes and Vickie comes up to him and sings Happy Father’s Day before the Secret Service guys take him away. This was idiotic. At least get a guy that looks like him.
We recap Big Show vs. Alberto. It’s more or less the same video we’ve seen a dozen times now with Show being run over (yet somehow being fine three weeks later) and then going insane on everyone in sight.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show
Show jumps Alberto during his entrance and the beating begins. After a few seconds of that, here’s Mark Henry to jump Show, sending him onto the announce table and hitting the World’s Strongest Slam through it. I don’t think the bell ever rang. Henry comes back and works on the knee of Show for like a second, apparently reinjuring his knee. The referee starts the count. HOW IS THIS NOT A FREAKING DISQUALIFICATION??? Unbelievable. They’re actually letting this go on because the bell never rang.
Show gets in at like 8 and we’re going to do this. The bell rings once Show is already in the ring after an 8 as there had to be a rule broken in there somewhere. Del Rio goes after the knee and gets Show down but his cover completely fails. Show gets a wicked chokeslam to send Del Rio to the floor. Show’s leg is done though so he can’t follow up. Del Rio goes up top but jumps into another chokeslam attempt.
Del Rio gets a kick to the knee again though and tries the Cross Armbreaker. You know, because he’s worked on the arm so much. Can’t stand idiotic thought like that. Show easily counters but takes another shot to the leg and Del Rio throws on a Cross Legbreaker to put Show in trouble. Show gets out of the hold and fights up. Actually he tries to but keeps falling down and they stop it. What a freaking mess.
Rating: D-. What a freaking mess this was. So somehow the referee is all cool with Henry destroying Show like that and just lets the match go on before stopping it due to Show not being able to stand up? Just a huge mess the entire time and it came off like a total trainwreck. This is the flaw in Show: you have to do stupid stuff like this to make him seem even remotely beatable and it gets a bit annoying.
Truth rants a bit more about name plates on the belt or something.
Wade Barrett does the always cool walking promo, talking about how he doesn’t like being in DC. Insert Anthony Weiner joke here. He makes fun of America and the national debt, saying all of us will be speaking Chinese in about twenty years. Oh and we need a king of queen. America is a hollow shell, just like Jackson.
Intercontinental Title: Ezekiel Jackson vs. Wade Barrett
There’s the required USA chant from the idiot fans. Jackson almost gets the Rack about a minute in but Barrett hits the floor to hide. Barrett gets a big boot in the corner to take over for two. Boss Man Slam gets two also. Pumphandle slam works on the second attempt and Barrett keeps his dominance going. A running big boot misses though and Jackson starts his comeback.
Another charge misses for Barrett but he blocks the slams. Wasteland hits and it only gets two. Barrett’s face is great as he is SHOCKED. There’s the USA chant again to waste some intelligence. Here come the slams and Jackson is all fired up. Torture Rack goes on and we have a new champion.
Rating: C-. Not much here as Jackson did what he needed to but it was still pretty boring. Not sure where he goes with it either but he needed to win a title to validate himself I guess. Barrett has already proven himself so the title doesn’t mean much to him anymore. Not bad but kind of dull overall.
Lawler goes to ask Jackson how it feels to win and he talks about declaring independence or something like that.
More stupid Obama stuff with Beth, Kelly and Santino meeting the bad impersonator. Santino teaches him the Cobra and the Secret Service panics, taking down Santino.
Punk talks about how DC is corrupt and everyone lies. He’s not a liar though and makes fun of the term sports entertainer. Rey isn’t a hero and is just trying to get rich, like everyone else. Punk is different because he tells you he’s using you. After he beats Rey, he’s going to do the most honest thing the WWE Universe has ever seen. Interesting.
Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk
Loud Punk chant by the smark crowd. Basic back and forth stuff to start as Cole talks about how all of Punk’s tattoos have meaning. He doesn’t say what those meanings are but they have meanings. They trade strikes until Rey sends him to the floor and hits a baseball slide. A seated senton off the ropes is countered into a hot shot into the barrier by Punk who takes over.
Surfboard goes on by Punk as I smile because Rey is screaming. Rey tries to speed things up but walks into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to set up that body scissors that Punk uses rather often. Rey gets him into the 619 position, only to have his head taken off by a Punk clothesline. Abdominal stretch goes on and Punk has to lean WAY down to get that hold on. Drop toehold sends Punk’s nose into the buckle, only to get caught in the Tree of Woe. Little masked freak deserves it.
Rey sends him to the floor and a big old Asai Moonsault takes Punk down. Punk is shaking his hand like he lost some feeling in it for a bit. Back in and Mysterio gets something resembling a top rope shoulder block for two. Punk rotates through the spinning cross body for two. They speed things up and it turns into a kick off. Swinging kick to the head gets two for Rey.
Belly to back off the top gets two for Punk who is still shaking his arm and hand a bit. Rey goes up but a splash eats knees which gets two for Punk. CM calls for the GTS and fires off some knees but the GTS is countered into a hurricanrana. A kick to the head gets two for Punk as the crowd is finally getting into this. Another GTS is countered into the 619 but Punk grabs that into the GTS for the pin, his second on PPV since he beat Taker via submission and both have been over Rey.
Rating: B+. Good match here as these two definitely have chemistry together. Punk’s speech pre-match is rather interesting as I’m curious as to what the most honest thing in the WWE is and given Punk, that could be a lot. Maybe a feud with Cena? As in a proper one minus Nexus? One can only hope.
We recap Christian vs. Orton, which I’m sure you know the story to by now. Christian won the title and had to defend it five days later against Orton who won it. Christian slowly went nuts, claiming that it was unfair and then turned heel, bashing Randy with the title. This is match #3 in their series. Christian’s heel turn speech is still awesome because it made perfect sense and showed him as a totally insecure guy that wasn’t as confident as he made himself up to be which is the most common criticism of him: he’s overrated.
Smackdown World Title: Randy Orton vs. Christian
Orton comes out first here which is kind of surprising. We get big match intros and they actually check for weapons. There’s an old school move for you. First two matches in this series were great so hopefully they can keep that up here. Orton takes over to start with a bunch of punches and his back arching Thesz Press. They speed things up and Orton gets two off a shoulder block.
Orton keeps avoiding Christian’s stuff including swatting away a dropkick and casually moving away to let Christian crash to the floor on a dive. Back in the ring and Orton hits nine punches in the corner. Always something odd about him I guess. Booker tries to play up the idea that Orton is shaky due to his recent concussion. Christian puts Orton head first into the steps and his eyes are starting to mess up.
Christian takes over and works on the neck/head, getting a neckbreaker for two. Spinebuster gets two. Orton’s head is all messed up now but he manages to whip Christian into the corner to buy himself a few seconds. Backdrop puts Christian down and Orton pounds away on the chest. Christian keeps fighting back with shots to the head and heads to the floor.
That doesn’t last long as Orton pulls him back to the apron and then hits a superplex for two. RKO and Killswitch are both broken up and Orton hits that powerbomb into a neckbreaker that he hasn’t used in years but is still an awesome looking move for two. Killswitch doesn’t work again so they head to the corner where Orton blocks a good deal of stuff and hits the elevated DDT for two.
Orton goes into his zone but the RKO is countered into a reverse DDT for two. I love how they keep playing up the history they have with all of these counters to signature moves because they’re so familiar with each other. Spear misses and Orton tries another RKO but Christian reverses that for the third time and hits the spear for a close two. Orton pops up with a dropkick to send Christian back into the corner but he walks into the pendulum kick but there’s the RKO out of nowhere and we’re done. Totally abrupt ending. Christian’s foot was under the ropes.
Rating: B. Good match but not as good as last month at Over the Limit. The ending hurt it a bit but I really liked the storytelling they were doing here with the head injury and the counters that went with it. Good stuff here and they have good chemistry together. The foot under the ropes might lead to something else but I doubt it.
Christian protests post match but gets decked with the belt anyway.
It’s 10:02 and there’s one match left. They almost have to throw something out there to fill in time. They stay in the ring for a LONG time, probably trying to kill off some time. We see the replay about three times and the foot is clearly under the ropes which Booker and Jerry say is too close to call.
Ad for Money in the Bank which is set up like a fairy tale read by Big Show to Horny who says again after it’s over. A bit more creative I guess. The theme song is Shane’s old theme.
Here are the Bellas with some guy named Keith Stone who apparently is a mild celebrity due to something about beer. They don’t talk or do anything so that’s it.
Recap of Cena vs. Truth. Truth says that the fans are lied to by Cena and that there’s a big conspiracy going on against Truth. Everyone else says Truth is nuts, which might be true. This seems to be the same video from the opening video.
Ah ok there’s a bonus match. This will help a lot.
Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne
The fans want Ryder again. Let it go already people. Basic power vs. speed here with no one caring but it’s hard to complain about free wrestling. Bourne does his speed moves to fly around everywhere and confuse Swagger but Jack catches him and works on the ribs. We hit the reverse chinlock as the Bellas are in the front row with the beer dude.
Swagger does the pushup on the chest of Bourne which apparently ticks the small man off. A back body drop of all things gets two for Jack. Vader Bomb gets two. Bourne starts his comeback with his usual kicks and basic offense. He loads up the Shooting Star but has to jump off due to Swagger being up. Big boot gets two.
Spinning DDT gets two and Bourne busts out the kicks. Pretty awesome finishing sequence as Bourne sets for the Shooting Star but lands on his feet. Swagger gets a sweet running charge into the gutwrench powerbomb which is countered into a sunset flip into the ankle lock which Bourne rolls through for the pin.
Rating: B-. I liked this quite a bit actually but I’m a fan of power vs. speed. This was just a bonus match and it ate up about ten minutes, making the main event far more realistic with about twenty minutes instead of closer to thirty or thirty five. That finishing sequence was rather good and the whole thing worked rather well, especially when it’s just a bonus. Can’t complain about free wrestling, especially when it’s pretty good.
And now let’s end this interesting stuff as we have Obama impersonator come out for Vince’s amusement. The SNL guy looks more like Obama than this one does. He has the speech pattern down but he doesn’t sound anything like Obama. He isn’t the GM because there would be more JR. “I love that fat bastard.” He wishes Cena luck and the booing is unreal.
He tries to leave but Booker calls him into the ring, calling him a homey. The guy gets in the ring and just get the Spinarooni out of the way already. Yep there it is. It isn’t funny, no one cares, and this wastes more time.
We recap Cena vs. Truth again in case you forgot about it. This video is different at least.
Raw World Title: R-Truth vs. John Cena
Truth has the belt but Cena is champion. As scary as it is, I could see Truth getting the title here. Big match intros set up a mixed reaction for Cena as always. Feeling out process to start but Truth gets in a shot to take over. Cena sends him to the floor and we stall a bit. AA doesn’t work and Truth hits a sitout gordbuster to get two. The dueling chants keep going as Truth gets a kick in for two.
Truth does a You Can’t See Me knockoff which ended in a legdrop for two. Spinning forearm gets two. Cena pulls himself up using Truth’s body. Truth says Cena can’t see him. This is kind of a slow paced match as Truth’s offense isn’t all that great. Big hip toss gets two. Lawler thinks Cena hasn’t taken Truth seriously enough. Cena gets up but can’t get the STF, only to get kicked down again by Truth.
Suplex gets two. This is a pretty dull match actually. Cena starts his comeback with the shoulder blocks. Five Knuckle Shuffle hits but Truth escapes the AA and hits the suplex into the Stunner “which we’ve NEVER seen before!” Truth talks to himself a lot but misses a charge in the corner and there’s the STF. Truth grabs the rope rather quickly though and the axe kick hits out of nowhere for two. Cena was out fast.
Truth goes up for a cross body but Cena rolls through into the AA attempt. Truth counters that into the jumping Downward Spiral for two. Cena hits the floor which would seem to set up something fishy. Truth goes out to the other side and is looking all crazy. He steals a hat from a Cena fan and gets a drink of water. The fan throws the water in Truth’s face! The distraction is enough for Cena to pull him in and hit the AA to retain!
Rating: D+. Pretty dull match here overall and I wasn’t into it for the most part. It’s not horrible but it’s just not interesting. The water going into his face is kind of a nice touch given that Truth did that to a kid on Raw a few weeks ago but at the same time it really wasn’t anything interesting. Total B show PPV match here and I can’t imagine it’ll go any further, not after Cena beat him clean.
Cena brings the kid into the ring post match and celebrates with the National Guard to end the show.
Rating: C-. This was a pretty weak show overall. It’s not bad to be sure but overall it feels kind of like it just came and went. I know I say this a lot but this is a show that would be perfect for the In Your House model. It’s a B show PPV and that might be being generous. Cena vs. Truth is a match that’s had a few weeks of build and for the most part, I can’t imagine it continuing after this. This didn’t feel like an important show at all and while it was ok, it was nothing I’ll ever want to watch again. That happens far too often in WWE anymore and it’s not good.
Dolph Ziggler b. Kofi Kingston – Sleeper
Alex Riley b. The Miz – Inverted DDT
Albert Del Rio b. Big Show – Referee Stoppage
Ezekiel Jackson b. Wade Barrett – Torture Rack
CM Punk b. Rey Mysterio – GTS
Randy Orton b. Christian – RKO
Evan Bourne b. Jack Swagger – Victory Roll
John Cena b. R-Truth – Attitude Adjustment