Road Wild 1999 – Dennis Rodman Still Can’t Wrestle

Road Wild 1999
Date: August 14, 1999
Location: Sturgis, South Dakota
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan

We’re back to South Dakota and the big biker rally (free tickets baby!) for the final one of these usually bad shows. The main event tonight is Hogan vs. Nash, title vs. career. Did I mention Nash was booking around this point? For a counterpoint to this, you might want to check out the Halloween Havoc review I just posted because it paints a nice contrast with Russo being the writer as opposed to Nash here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Hogan vs. Nash and establishes the circumstances. It’s Hogan’s title and career vs. just Nash’s career. Oh well it’s not like the title means anything by this point anyway.

The announcers spend way too much time running down the card, which includes Dennis Rodman vs. Randy Savage in Savage’s final WCW match.

We recap the Cruiserweight six man which resulted in the formation of the Filthy Animals. They feuded with Vampiro and tie Insane Clown Posse because….well because someone had to I guess.

Vampiro/Insane Clown Posse vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman/Eddie Guerrero

They aren’t called the Filthy Animals yet and Rey is Cruiserweight Champion. Raven is here with the clowns too. Big brawl to start and the Animals take over with speed and talent. Eddie hits his slingshot headbutt and Vampiro is in trouble. Eddie and Vampiro speed things up and the ICP do their usual array of stomping. The announcers are pushing the band as hard as they can for cross promotional stuff and it’s not clicking at all. The bikers aren’t helping.

The Clowns beat on Eddie and I feel so sorry about him having to do this. Vampiro finally comes back in and Eddie is allowed to actually do something, climbing the ropes for a springboard rana which looked great. A Rock Bottom puts Eddie down for two. A superplex puts Shaggy down and it’s a double tag to bring in Rey and Jay. Everything breaks down and they head outside where Raven cheats, allowing Vampiro to hit the Nail in the Coffin on Rey.

Rey gets beaten down for awhile which is a sign of his greatness as he’s able to make guys even as bad as the Clowns look passable. Vampiro comes in with a release powerbomb which looked cool. Tony says Vampiro has a lot of strength. He does? Shaggy hits a powerslam and Rey is tossed to the floor again. The ring is up on a platform so the sound is a lot better for the crashes on the floor.

Raven, even the nutjob, yells at Rey but doesn’t hit him. It looks like he’s pretending to cry, which I guess is a mental game of some sort. Shaggy doesn’t cover because he’s an idiot and charges into the corner like the idiot that he is. Rey gets a boot up and brings in Kidman who cleans house. Everything breaks down and the Filthy Animals speed things way up. Eddie hits a huge dive onto Vampiro and Kidman pins Shaggy with the Shooting Star Press.

Rating: B-. Again, amazing what happens when you let talented guys have some time in a wrestling ring. The match was perfectly fine for an opener to get the crowd going. That’s what cruiserweights are for and with a stacked face team like that, you knew you were going to get something fun. Good stuff and already WAY better than Halloween Havoc would be.

We recap the tag title feud. The Jersey Triad (no not THAT Jersey Triad, although that would have been awesome) had the titles and could use the Freebird Rule, but that was changed so that it meant every match could be 3-2. Harlem Heat reunited to take them on and here’s the match where only two of the champions are allowed to team at once. Dusty Rhodes had taken over the championship committee from the crooked Flair so the Freebird Rule was switched to just a regular version of it.

Tag Titles: Jersey Triad vs. Harlem Heat

It’s Kanyon and Bigelow here. Bigelow’s belt falls off as he comes out because he’s fat. Big brawl to start and they botch something. I’m really surprised that Bigelow, who looks like a biker, is getting booed here at a biker rally. Ray vs. Kanyon finally gets us started. The announcers are actually breaking the match down and talking about how the Heat are rusty but are brothers so they work together naturally. See how much better it works when you talk about the match?

Stevie slams both of them and the Triad chills on the floor for a bit. Kanyon comes in and wants Booker so here we go again. We talk about Charles Robinson being a biased referee which again pertains to the match. I don’t know how to handle this. They remedy themselves by talking about the main event a bit as this match is going nowhere. The reason would be that the Triad is chilling on the floor.

Ok so it’s Stevie vs. Bigelow now. Off to Kanyon after Bigelow takes him down after some, shall we say, really boring stuff. Time for a chinlock as we’re waiting on the hot tag to Booker so we can get to the ending of the match. The champions set for a spike…something (piledriver I think) but Stevie slingshots Kanyon into Bigelow for a crotching. Here’s Booker to clean house but the Axe Kick is broken up. Everything breaks down and here’s DDP for interference. He accidentally rams into Bigelow though and a missile dropkick by Booker gives the Heat their 8th tag titles.

Rating: D+. Not the worst tag match I’ve ever seen but it could have been a lot better. Kanyon and Bigelow were probably the weakest combination they could have thrown out there, but Page has a singles match later in the show. The Heat would hold the titles for 8 days so it’s not like this was any huge title reign or switch.

We recap the West Texas Rednecks vs. The Revolution which is really just an extension of a short feud between Saturn and Hennig. It turned into a big gang war.

West Texas Rednecks vs. The Revolution

It’s Hennig/Barry Windham/Bobby Duncum Jr. vs. Saturn/Douglas/Malenko. What is with all the tag matches so far tonight? Big brawl to start and the Revolution clears the ring. Officially we start with Windham vs. Malenko but Saturn and Douglas come in quickly off two tags. Saturn chops away at Duncum and then it’s back to Windham. Saturn gets beaten down and my mind wanders a bit due to boredom.

Off to Dean who does a little something and then it’s back to Douglas who can’t quite get the Pittsburgh Plunge. Now it’s his turn to get beaten down and this match is going nowhere. Duncum gets a shoulderbrekaer for two. There’s nothing to talk about in this match at all. It’s been about two minutes since I last typed anything. Saturn comes in and everything breaks down. Malenko hooks Hennig in the Cloverleaf but Barry’s brother Kendall makes the save. Death Valley Driver on Duncum ends this.

Rating: D+. Well that match existed. There’s nothing else to say about it other than that: it happened. It wasn’t really good, it wasn’t really bad, but it happened. There wasn’t really a story here other than “we don’t like each other” which isn’t exactly something that’s going to carry a match. Next.

We recap Miller vs. Bagwell. Miller said he could dance, Bagwell imitated him, Bagwell stole his shoes, let’s have a match.

Ernest Miller vs. Buff Bagwell

Miller is a heel with Sonny Onoo managing him. Both guys say stuff before the match. I don’t particularly care, so I don’t bother listening. Feeling out process to start and Cat poses a lot. The fans chant pussy cat which is about as interesting as this is going to get isn’t it? We’re almost three minutes in and NOTHING has happened. Bagwell gets things going so Cat hits him low right in front of the referee but it’s not a DQ for no apparent reason.

Miller takes over and Sonny keeps cheating. As annoying as he was, Sonny at least knew how to cheat, which is a lost art anyway. Time for a chinlock and Tony thankfully talks about Hogan vs. Nash. Buff hits a suplex to put both guys down. END THIS ALREADY! Buff starts his comeback and gets a crossbody for two. Sonny gets on the apron with a briefcase and Cat is rammed into it so Bagwell can badly mess up a rollup for the pin.

Rating: F. Whoever thought this deserved eight minutes should have a horse attached to all of their limbs while someone tells the horses to run as fast as they can. Or even worse, made to watch this match. Terribly boring and I can think of a total of zero reasons as to why this was on PPV.

Miller beats him up post match.

We recap Page vs. Benoit. Benoit won the US Title recently and Page has been saying that Benoit wasn’t ready. Mama was mentioned and IT’S ON!

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Benoit won the title off the joke of David Flair so this is the first decent PPV title defense in months. Page apologizes to Mama Crazy Man before the match then implies she’s a whore. The belt is the old US Title design but it looks different for some reason, almost like a replica. This is No DQ. Benoit immediately kicks him low and the beating is on. Page tries the helicopter bomb (love that move) but Benoit counters and sends him to the floor. Baseball slide gives him control and they head to the floor, as in the part below the platform.

Back to the ring and Page tries a German. Benoit is like dude….no. Page settles for a belly to belly for two and takes over. He hits something like a hybrid F5 and Wasteland for a delayed two. Page works on the ribs and they exchange quick pin attempts. Gorgeous spinebuster gets two. Page beats away for a long time and the No DQ aspect hasn’t meant much at all yet.

They go to the corner where Benoit gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Page finally gets a little violent, whipping his ribs with his belt. Time for some choking with the belt, including Page putting Benoit on his shoulders to hang him. Benoit uses the ropes to escape and whips Page. Three Rolling Germans get two.

He loads up the Swan Dive but Kanyon comes in for the save. The Revolution is in the back watching but doesn’t come in. Page is sent into Kanyon which gets two for Benoit. Bigelow runs out and hits a top rope splash for two on Benoit. Bigelow is sent into Kanyon (bad match for him) and Bigelow accidentally hits Page low. The Swan Dive keeps the belt in Canada.

Rating: C+. Not exactly a huge brawl but they pushed Benoit pretty strong here. This would have been a good push if Sid hadn’t killed Benoit dead for the title the next month and the following month Rick Steiner hadn’t beaten Benoit for the TV Title, but that’s WCW for you. No wonder Benoit bailed. I can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same.

We give away a motorcycle.

We recap Sting vs. Sid. It’s basically Sid is on a monster heel push and says he’ll be the Millennium Man so he’s beating up everyone in the company and tonight’s it’s Sting’s turn. Goldberg and Rick Steiner were involved also and are in a match later.

Sting vs. Sid Vicious

Sid stalls to start and it’s power vs. speed here. That’s kind of different as Sting is usually a power guy. Sid gets knocked to the floor and we stall some more. Sting knocks him into the crowd a few times. This is really just gussied up stalling. Back inside and the Stinger Splash misses to give Sid a chance. Tony explains that the guys in this match want to pin each other. I know WCW fans weren’t the smartest in the world but come on now.

Off to a chinlock which isn’t the most interesting thing in the world. I mention this because we’re in front of about 5,000 drunk bikers, so take a guess as to how they react to it. Out to the floor now for a change of pace. My goodness there are some ugly people at this show. Time now for another chinlock and Sting is kind of snuggling up to Sid’s crotch. Well there goes my childhood hero.

Sid channels his inner Flair for no apparent reason and goes up, only to get slammed down. It doesn’t really work as Sid trips Sting (as in puts his leg out so that Sting falls over it) to take over again. Sid wouldn’t be so boring if he wasn’t so slow. I mean he waits FOREVER to do any move he uses. For absolutely no apparent reason Sid goes up again and a superplex puts him down. Two Stinger Splashes have Sid in trouble but he catches the third in the chokeslam for the clean pin.

Rating: D+. Boring match but Sid’s push was pretty solid around this time. You know, until he turned face for no real apparent reason and shattered his leg and ended his career for like five years. Not much to see here though but it’s cool to see a clean ending, given what was coming in just a few months for this company.

We recap Goldberg vs. Rick Steiner which is really just setting up another victim for Goldie as we built to Sid vs. Goldberg at Havoc.

Rick Steiner vs. Goldberg

The announcers try to push Steiner as having a chance here. That’s hilarious. Well not really because that means I’d be laughing, which I’m not. They’ve changed Goldberg’s song to a Megadeath one now too because the original just didn’t work anymore I guess. You know, probably the most famous song in WCW not associated with the NWO. The fans chant for him still so maybe there’s not much to it.

They go straight to the corner and Goldberg runs him over. Steiner tries a jumping back elbow and he looks like a helicopter. A superkick puts Rick down and Heenan says Goldberg is a once in a lifetime find. Naturally WCW messed him up and made him lose to Nash but whatever. Steiner goes after the knee, which is weak or something from what I can figure out.

He wraps the knee brace around his fist to pound on Goldberg which isn’t a DQ either. Tony actually explains it because it’s not a foreign object. Why isn’t that the case more often? It makes sense, but you never hear that explanation. Steiner hammers on the knee and this is going to be short. You can feel it. Belly to belly gets two. What was called a DDT (it looked awful and was clear that Goldberg was falling forward instead of Rick pulling him, worst I’ve EVER seen) gets the same. And then Goldberg is tired of getting beaten on so he makes his comeback and hits the finishers for the pin. And that’s that.

Rating: D. I see no reason as to why this wasn’t on PPV. It’s less than six minutes and Goldberg seemingly got bored before firing back and hitting his finishing sequence for the pin. Not much to see here and it was a pretty boring match. Goldberg would hurt his arm at the beginning of the year so it’s not like this went anywhere. He would feud with Bret (not on this card) to end the year.

We recap Dennis Rodman vs. Savage and yes, this is really happening. Savage promises that Gorgeous George will be here and protected by the driver of the Hummer. See Bash at the Beach 99 for an explanation of that one which I’m not getting into.

Randy Savage vs. Dennis Rodman

Rodman comes out in a boxing robe. This would be Savage’s last match until he was at the second monthly TNA PPV. Rodman runs his mouth a bit first and yep he’s wasted. They go to the floor immediately and I’m assuming this is No DQ or hardcore or something. The announcers probably hurt themselves diving on the floor to suck Rodman off for using bare bones offense.

A Russian Legsweep gets a HUGE reaction from the announcers as they marvel over his skills. And there goes the referee for no apparent reason but Rodman hit him anyway. Not that it matters because a second one comes in but whatever. Schiavone thinks that due to some of the stuff Rodman has done that Savage, one of the best EVER, might respect him now. Give me a break.

Now Savage beats up a WCW.com photographer so he can hit Rodman with a camera for two. Down goes referee #2 and the third one goes down as soon as he hits the ring. Rodman knocks Savage to the floor, making him the second consecutive guy to land on the .com guy in a row. They fight up the ramp and I use that term loosely. Actually I use both terms loosely as it’s designed to look like a road.

Savage is sent into the trash as they go behind the set. We get to the infamous spot of the match where Rodman is thrown into a Porta-Potty which is tipped over. They go back to the ring and Rodman jumps off the middle rope to take out the fourth referee. Here’s Gorgeous George (sans bodyguard) as Rodman cuddles Savage. Oh ok so that was a sleeper. George hands Savage a chain then hits Rodman low. A chain shot ends this.

Rating: F. Just…no. You can figure out the reasons why it gets this rating on your own I believe.

We recap Hogan vs. Nash which is title/career vs. career. Hogan turned face again recently before this so it’s not like there’s any real secret to this one.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Hulk Hogan

The announcers try to push this as the biggest match ever and do it in the quiet voices so you know they’re serious. The fans are completely behind Hogan which I think everyone expected to be the case, which probably has something to do with the yellow and red coming back. Nash shoves him around until Hulk takes off the bandana to show he’s serious. Nothing to talk about so far.

Nash grabs a headlock as the announcers talk about how great they are. At least it’s the main event and an actual big showdown for that for once. I’m sorry but I can’t buy Jarrett vs. DDP as the biggest match ever. Hogan shoves him to the floor and we stall a bit. Time for a test of strength and Hogan goes to one knee. Of course the cheering brings him back up and Nash hits a knee to the stomach to take over.

We get to the regular match now as Nash uses his power game to keep Hogan down. There really isn’t anything special to mention here as it’s a Hogan 80s match all over again. The big man beats them down, the finisher hits, Hogan comes back. I have a feeling I could not type anything for about five minutes and that would be accurate. Hogan makes a brief comeback with ten punches in the corner but Nash takes over again soon. I’m right as Nash beats him down, hits the Jackknife for two, Hogan Hulks Up and the leg drop gives Nash a few months off. Oh and Hogan was busted.

Rating: D. It’s a Hogan vs. a monster match and that’s all well and good….in 1986. The problem is that this is 1999 and therefore not exactly a cutting edge match. It was about 12 minutes long and there’s nothing we haven’t seen a few hundred times before. You would think for Hogan vs. Nash, one of the few mega main events they had left that they would give it more than this but whatever.

Overall Rating: D. The show is bad, but it’s the boring kind of bad which is a lot worse than bad bad. The problem here is that there’s really nothing to make fun of. It just keeps going and there’s nothing interesting at all about it. These shows were so dull in 1999 that it’s no wonder they died for all intents and purposes by the time Russo took over. Nothing to see here AT ALL.

 

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3 comments

  1. Sebastian Howard says:

    So shocked that *amazing* Sting/Sid match didn’t get ten and a half stars or a AA.

  2. Adam King says:

    I’m not surprised that you forget to mention Rick Steiner was the Television Champion at the time, given how rarely he defended it, if he even did.

  3. AXIV says:

    This was the first PPV I ever bought, I was very nervous about the possibility of Hulk Hogan’s retirement and didn’t want to miss what could have been his last match. Was happy to see Hogan win.