New Year’s Revolution 2007 – HHH Gets Hurt. Again.

New Year’s Revolution 2007
Date: January 7, 2007
Location: Kemper Arena, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Now before we get to the buildup, this date is more important around here for another reason. On this date, within 24 hours of each other, myself, Lee and Ricky all signed up here. That is never going to be topped, period.

As for the show, it’s a far more traditional PPV this time with a better looking card. The main event here is Umaga vs. Cena for the belt with Umaga being the undefeated killing machine. Also on tonight’s card we have Rated RKO vs. DX for the tag titles where the ending is a bit important. The rest of this is decent looking but not great.

This is the last of the series so I figured I’d just knock the whole thing out in two days to save some time. All that being said, let’s finish off the New Year’s Revolution series.

No intro video here which is kind of odd really. Instantly we’re lowering a steel cage to set up this.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro

And after that we go to the intro video. That’s the ECW style which is different and I still don’t like it. To be fair though, here all we saw was a cage lowering instead of a whole intro, but I still don’t like it that much. It talks about DX and Rated RKO and the title match. Melina’s skirt MIGHT be 5 inches long. Jeff is champion here in case you were wondering. These two had a kind of long feud over the belt.

This is just after December to Dismember, which freaking sucked and it sucked hard. The crowd is way into this mind you. I like having a cage match like this where it’s going to be fast paced to open the show. I’m not sure on the cage actually, but one thing it does accomplish is prevent the show from grinding to a halt to set it up. Nitro hits that sweet springboard rotating kick that he does at times.

I can’t decide whether I like Melina screaming or not. They’re starting off a bit slow here but that’s fine as they could be setting up for a hot finish. In a spot I liked a lot, Hardy goes for the Whisper in the Wind but instead he jumps up to try to get out of the cage. Again, that’s thinking while wrestling. You can win by pin here too. The fans are way into it so that’s always a good sign.

Nitro climbs up but Hardy makes the save, getting Nitro’s legs stuck in the top of the cage, more or less putting him in a massive Tree of Woe. Melina smacks Jeff’s hands with her belt and Nitro gets a nice missile dropkick. We get the double escape attempt as Nitro goes over the top and Jeff goes through the door. Nitro puts his feet on the door while hanging on the top of the cage to block it. Jeff dropkicks the door so Nitro crotches himself on it and walks out. Creative ending there.

Rating: B. Very fun match here as both guys were moving and the crowd was into it. That always makes things better in the end as the match came off fast and crisp. These two worked well together and made the title look important, at least for awhile. Fear not though, as Santino would show up to kill it in the near future.

Rated RKO says they’ll take out DX and the nostalgic run is over. That’s most amusing.

Tag Team Turmoil

The idea here is a gauntlet match where you have two teams start and they have a match, then the winners face the next team. This was a bonus match that was thrown on so this is really just to fill in time. The winners get a future tag title shot. There are five teams in this and the first two are the Highlanders and the World’s Greatest Tag Team.

Roddy Piper has cancer here, which is a point as the Highlanders are also from Scotland. The WGTT are Benjamin and Hass for those of you that aren’t familiar with them. They really were good. Rory shows off his wrestling abilities and outmoves Shelton. That’s pretty impressive actually. Their names are Rory and Robbie in case you didn’t know that either.

After a bit of a brawl we have Shelton hooking a superplex from the top rope to put the Highlanders out. Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Jim Duggan are a team here. Why’s that? I have no idea at all but it was a flat out terrible time for the tag belts back in the day so there you are. This one is far shorter as Duggan does most of the work and gets beaten down before getting a hot tag after about a minute or two.

Crazy comes in and cleans house but the Mexican gets a German suplex from the American for the pin. And people say WWE isn’t international. Cade and Murdoch are in next. They would soon become the flavor of the month in the tag division, meaning no one cared about them but they were pushed anyway as there was no one else around at all to do it otherwise.

They slow it down a lot here and take it to the mat with the rednecks dominating. That makes sense at least as we have the WGTT in trouble here. They were ok I guess but I never really could get into them. Vince had a deep infatuation with rednecks and hillbillies over the years though. Not quite to musclemen levels but close enough. Haas gets Murdoch in the Haas of Pain which was always awesome but Cade jumps him off the top to break it up and get the pin.

Crime Time, the hot team at the moment comes out to a great pop. JTG just bleeds charisma. He’s talented too so I’d pick him as the more talented of the two. Lawler actually has some information as these are the final two teams in this shindig. The heels are dominating early on here if you can call this early on. More or less at this point it’s just a regular tag team which is ok I guess. Shad gets the hot tag and cleans ring.

This was back when the team was interesting and funny rather than being the only face team on the roster and therefore over by requirement. They hit their assisted neckbreaker on Cade to win it. They never used the title shot as they were released a bit before it.

Rating: C. It ran for a bit too long but seeing four actual teams out there is a nice sign. This was ok but nothing great though. The pacing was fine though and it wasn’t bad at all for a gimmick match. This was meant to fill in time and it did its job rather well indeed.

Vince and Coach are talking about the Rosie O’Donnell and Donald Trump feud. This led to the midget match between the two that Meltzer said was the worst match of the year. And the main event from the previous Raw had been Kevin Federline vs. John Cena. Let that sink in a bit.

Kenny Dykstra vs. Ric Flair

Dykstra is the only person left from the Spirit Squad and now he’s just arrogant. He stole Flair’s robe after beating him twice by cheating and Rated RKO giving him a conchairto. Flair is wearing a very pink robe. That’s the only way to describe it: very pink. We’re starting off with about as basic of a match as you could possibly ask for. Dykstra puts on the worst Boston Crab I’ve seen this side of WCW.

Flair’s back is worked over as this just isn’t that good. And now Flair has the figure four for no apparent reason but the crowd pops like crazy for it. Maybe there’s something to this Flair guy. I keep wanting to make South Park jokes because of the commentary. Kenny gets a low blow out of nowhere and rolls up Flair for the pin.

Rating: D. This was just boring. I mean I kept waiting on ANYTHING to happen and it never came. However, great props here as they had Flair do the best thing he could do: he put Kenny over for the third time in a row, so I don’t question the booking at all.

Nitro has a big bag of ice on his balls. Apparently we’ll be getting MNM vs. the Hardys soon. Melina runs into Victoria and she says that they should be a team. This went nowhere.

Women’s Title: Victoria vs. Mickie James

So for a month and a half, Victoria has had a hit list of the Divas to get to James and this is the end of that. Mickie is still rocking the insane skirts at this point. Ross and Lawler talk about Jack Doane’s hometown for zero explainable reason. Lillian is cheering for Mickie as Lillian almost got a Widow’s Peak on Raw.

Mickie starts throwing punches which is weird to see. And Lawler gets to use the line of he loves to see her wrestle but he’d love to see her box. Ross misses it though so we get no rebuttal. Melina comes out to help Victoria and it doesn’t work as Mickie hits her spinning DDT for the pin.

Rating: F+. Only reason are all the great shots. The booking here makes zero sense as they built Victoria up as the monster for a month and a half and now it’s just thrown away. Oh well, they looked hot so that’s all that matters in this division.

Hulk Hogan DVD ad. Again, this is far funnier now.

We recap DX vs. Rated RKO which started as the heels were tired of DX monopolizing the main event. Holy shoot that isn’t supposed to be a shoot. Rated RKO also beat the heck out of Flair. That became the focus of the feud because it’s required by WWE law that Flair is referenced at least once a month, as WWF/E MADE Flair, not that other NWA or WCW thing.

Raw Tag Titles: Rated RKO vs. DX

The combination of Burn In My Light and Metalingus (Edge’s theme for those interested) is SWEET. This starts as a massive brawl on the floor if nothing else. And we get a bell. At least it wasn’t that long. Fans are WAY behind DX here. Shawn and Edge are in there now and let the loud spot calling begin. We get the reference of course to DX never holding the tag titles which wasn’t as big of a deal as it was supposed to be.

This is more of a physically based match as they’re just out there beating on each other with Edge working on HHH’s leg. Shawn gets the hot tag to take control. The crowd is way into this match too as they have been all night long. Shawn launches himself over the ropes to take out Edge and Orton which looked pretty good. There’s that cursed DX chant again. Shawn is down because of an Edge spear on the floor so he’s your degenerate in peril.

Oh and he took a belt shot too. I wonder if that’s like a Jell-O shot. Oh I had to go there so give me a break. Shawn is busted up pretty bad over the forehead. More or less he’s just getting his ass handed to him for a long time while getting in various little shots here and there to make people know he’s still alive. He blocks the RKO and begins the crawl. I wonder if Miley Cyrus considered that for the Climb.

Yeah I’m way too bored here which is odd as this has been pretty good so far. HHH gets the hot tag and goes off. CLOTHESLINE FOR EDGE! HIGH KNEE FOR ORTON! FACEBUSTER FOR EDGE! SPINEBUSTER FOR ORTON! TORN QUAD FOR HHH! Yep, HHH messes up a spinebuster and blows out his other quad, putting him on the shelf until Summerslam. Ross tries to say it’s the same leg that Edge worked on earlier, which is nonsense but nice try anyway.

He tries to keep going to his credit but his leg is just freaking gone. They need to go to the end now as HHH is trying but this simply isn’t working. Orton tries to end it with a chair shot but for some reason he pulls back to hit HHH but stops and then runs away with the chair. HHH tries a Pedigree but it can’t work and he can’t even cover. Edge gets up at two and you can tell Edge and Orton have no idea what to do. Enter Shawn to save the day.

He kicks the tar out of Orton then throws a plancha. He punches the referee and lays them both out with chairs. Notice what he’s doing here: he’s taking the focus off of HHH to keep the fans from losing the focus of the match. DX then puts both of them through tables at ringside and Rated RKO looks dead. Shawn and Cena would win the titles in about three weeks.

Rating: B-. The ending isn’t fair to grade but dang man, points to Shawn for taking charge out there at the end. HHH kept going too to his credit as no one would think a thing of him if he just laid there holding his leg. Not a bad match, but other than the beatdown it’s nothing that you’ll remember later on.

Cena does an over the top interview about the main event but he’s intentionally being over the top, which is kind of funny but not great. You can vaguely hear the Spanish announcers talking during this.

Carlito vs. Chris Masters

This is about Torrie or something. I really don’t care though. The announcers try to cover up the fact that no one cares at all about this by saying the fans are just in shock. That’s rather amusing indeed. More or less this is about Masters trying to get the Masterlock while Carlito does everything else. Masters uses something like a rollup out of the Masterlock and the tights for the win.

Rating: F-. This was just freaking pointless and Torrie had that stupid dog with her that I always wanted to break. Total filler and the chance to bridge the double main event.

More or less, Umaga is unstoppable, Cena is going to try to stop him. That’s it.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Umaga

The big match introductions never get old to me. This is during Cena’s year long reign that made him so freaking hated. Umaga is just destroying him early on so cue up the Superman music for later. Cena has had maybe two moves in ten minutes. This is domination. Take out the Superman music and give us the Zeke Jackson music.

Cena hits the Throwback but he apparently hasn’t read up on his stereotypes as a shot to the head won’t hurt him at all. Ross references Yokozuna with Umaga, which is a bit much for my taste. The FU doesn’t work either. More or less the fatness of Umaga is too much. And it’s nerve hold time. That gave me a funny image of Samoans in a medical school learning how to do those holds. That’s rather amusing.

After the hold though he RAPS UP and starts his ending sequence, only to not be able to get the FU. Umaga goes for the running ass shot but Cena gets his feet into the chest and rolls Umaga up for the pin. I’ll give them that one: that was a lot more realistic than just getting the FU for the pin, and they kept Umaga looking strong.

Rating: B. Not bad at all here as this was in essence a throwaway show and a token title defense for Cena, although in the end it wound up paying off. That’s always a good sign as this wasn’t a terrible match at all and was actually pretty entertaining. They kept both guys looking strong which set them up for last man standing the following month.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s a lot of good and there’s a lot of bad here. Again that’s something you saw a good deal of with the brand only shows, as so often they could build to a good main event or events but the midcard was just BAD. This was a decent enough show though as the good matches all delivered. It was by no means great but it would be worth checking out if you have some time to kill and there’s nothing really good on. Check it out I guess, but nothing to go out of your way to see.

 

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