USWA Championship Wrestling – January 12, 1991: I Guess They Didn’t Like The Main Event

USWA Championship Wrestling
Date: January 12, 1991
Location: USWA Television Studios, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentator: Dave Brown

Back to Memphis for a few more shows. At the moment I have five straight shows from this period so things hopefully won’t be all that boring. I’ll be doing the first two here before we move back to WCW for some Nitro. I don’t know what to expect from these guys but they’re very hit or miss, so this is a roll of the dice. Let’s get to it.

The opening video with the statues and clips of Lawler gets us going.

Brown runs down the card.

A guy named Eddie Marlon, a suit, says that he got a call from Eddie Gilbert who has left the company. He was the Southern Heavyweight Champion so we’ll need a one night tournament.

We get a clip of the reunited Fabulous Ones winning the tag titles from Doug Gilbert and Tony Anthony. Cornette was managing them which fits very well with Stan Lane.

Fabulous Ones vs. Bill Rush/Sgt. O’Reilley

The Fabulous Ones come out to The Boys Are Back In Town which is a nice touch. Cornette runs his mouth on the floor and he’s fired up tonight. The perk of such a small place like the TV studio is you can hear individual fans so Cornette is having a ball trading insults with them. Lane starts with the Sarge and it’s clear we’re in squash territory here. Rush comes in and gets the same treatment. Keirn pins the Sarge with a plain forearm smash. Total squash.

Lawler comes out and says he’ll have the Fabs’ back like they’ll have his. Cornette gets behind Lawler and pops him with the racket, leading to a double team beatdown. They give him a spike piledriver on the concrete as women are SCREAMING. Lane puts on the crown as some wrestlers come out to protect Lawler. Cornette explains the story which has something to do with a $50,000 bounty and some group called the Memphis Mafia. They’re the ones that scared Gilbert off too.

They call Terry (presumably Funk) on the phone and say they’re 2 for 2 for $100,000. Marlon comes out and yells at Cornette, saying that Lawler will be back with a partner next week. Keirn talks about two years ago when Lawler set Keirn on fire while they were partners. Man you have to keep up with Memphis to know what’s going on at times. Cornette rants some more because that’s what Jim Cornette does. Long angle here but it worked.

Here’s Downtown Bruno, more famous as Harvey Whippleman.

Terry Garvin vs. Freezer Thompson

Well there was a guy named Refrigerator so why not Freezer? Bruno talks about reforming the Downtown Connection which I guess is his stable. Freezer is a very fat man and Terry throws him around with relative ease. This is a very slow squash as Garvin poses a lot in between each move. Garvin stops the comeback with a bulldog and wins with a spinning facejam called Sleeping Beauty.

Rating: D. This was a squash and a long one at that. Garvin looked fine but he was pretty average for the most part. He’s not the same Terry Garvin that was arrested for sexual harassment either. Freezer was a freaking load and Garvin said that he weighed 600lbs. I don’t think that’s really an exaggeration either.

House show ad. The way Memphis worked, there was a big show at the Mid-South Coliseum every Monday so TV was there just to set up those matches. There’s going to be a one night tournament for the Southern Title.

Marlon, who must be a boss of some kind, comes out and says Lawler has picked Bill Dundee to team with him against the Fabs. That’s a pretty stacked card.

Gilbert/Anthony, managed by Bruno come out and say they want the Fabulous Ones also. Apparently they’re the Memphis Mafia.

Call Jerry Lawler’s Hotline. Did anyone not have one of those in the 90s? You can call and leave him a message. And I’m sure he personally hears all of them right?

Danny Davis vs. Michael Green

This is OVW Danny Davis. Davis takes him to the mat with ease and rides on him a bit. Davis wins it quickly with a neckbreaker.

Davis talks about a fan’s revenge strap match he has on Monday with Joseph Magliano. Magliano comes out and says nothing of note.

House show ads.

Memphis Mafia vs. New Kids/Cody Michaels/Jerry Lynn

I have no idea who the New Kids are. This is an eight man tag. Michaels and Dirty White Boy (Tony Anthony) start things off. Michaels hip tosses all four Mafia members and they have a conference on the floor. Off to Doug Gilbert who is Mafia and Lynn who is blonde. Lynn looks very different than he usually does, but it’s mainly due to the bright blue trunks instead of his usual black tights.

Anthony slams him and it’s off to Gilbert again. Side slam puts Lynn down and the Mafia tags a lot. Magliano was in there for literally less than five seconds. Backdrop puts Lynn down and it’s off to Sam Lowe, who is part of the Mafia who wears jeans and a collared shirt. He seems to be a manager or something and walks into a sunset flip by Lynn for the surprise pin.

Rating: D+. Considering most of the people on the face side didn’t make the match, this wasn’t that good. Lynn hit a total of one move in the whole match but got the pin anyway. Nothing to see here but it came off like an upset. I still have no idea what the New Kids’ names are either, but they seem to be a pretty boy tag team.

Video on Jeff Jarrett, who would win the tournament on Monday. This is set to America the Beautiful of all things.

Apparently the eight man tag match is 2/3 falls. Then why did the winners go to the back? They left and no mention was made of a second fall. Ok then.

Lynn and Lowe start again and Lowe gets thrown around with ease. Off to Anthony and Brian of the New Kids. Is that Brian Christopher? Ok apparently it is and his partner in the New Kids is named Tony Williams. Got it. They double team Gilbert with an assisted splash for two. Off to Tony Anthony vs. Tony Williams. Magliano comes in to pound away a bit. Everything breaks down and Magliano rolls up Lynn with tights for the pin.

The Mafia leaves even though there’s a fall to go. The other team leaves too and yeah there’s going to be a third fall.

Brown recaps the show so far. He also talks about Monday’s show. Brown also recaps the story with Funk, (he mispronounces his name. Guess what he said on TV) which basically is that someone put a bounty on Lawler and Gilbert, the #2 and #1 contenders for the world title, held by Funk. Cornette cashed in on the bounty and the phone call was revealing who had put it out.

Video on Bill Dundee set to a song called Gypsies on Parade. We have less than four minutes left of TV time and there’s a fall to go in that match. But hey, let’s get this in. Make that three minutes as another verse begins.

Here’s Lawler who calls out Cornette and the Fabulous Ones, talking about how the bounty can’t be collected yet. He and Dundee are ready for Monday night.

Brown wraps up the show and talks about the Monday show again and that’s it. No mention of the tag match at all. Ok then. For a rating for the match, go with what I gave for the first fall as the second was too short to mean anything.

Overall Rating: C. This was entertaining enough but the missing third fall is going to bother me for some reason. Why they didn’t include it at all is beyond me and I want to know who won the match now. Other than that, the rest of the show was pretty good and we got a big angle with the Fabulous Ones turning. I liked this and I’ll be sticking around for more of it.

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