NXT – May 29, 2013: The Low Point So Far

NXT
Date: May 29, 2013
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Brad Maddox

Tonight we have some main event stuff to get to as it’s time for the #1 contenders battle royal, with the winner getting a shot at Langston at some point in the future. Other than that it’s hard to say what we’ll get which is one of the most interesting parts of a show like NXT. Odds are everyone will be in the battle royal with some working other matches tonight. Let’s get to it.

Welcome Home.

Wyatt Family vs. Travis Tyler/Sawyer Fulton

Non-title. There’s something very wrong about the Family having Twitter handles. Sawyer and Harper get things going with Lke running over Fulton like one half of a monster tag team running over a jobber in a squash match. Off to Rowan who pounds away in the corner with a headbutt and a chop before it’s back to Harper for more chops. Tom says that the tag is off to Fulton, making me think he has no idea which is which. Not that it really matters as Harper charges at Fulton in the corner and the discus lariat is good for the pin at 2:30.

Here’s Stephanie McMahon (in a studio) for a big announcement. She says that there will be a tournament to crown the first NXT Divas Champion. The tournament starts next week.

Emma vs. Audrey Marie

I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’m warming up to the dancing. Why this isn’t a first round tournament match is beyond me but the more interesting part is the crowd going NUTS for Emma. She wants her music started again after the bell rings for more dancing but Audrey smacks her in the face. More dancing ensues but Emma gets two off a sunset flip. A bad looking gutwrench suplex gets two for Marie and they trade some backslides for two each. Emma even busts out a Tarantula, called the Dilemma. Emma hits a slingshot to set up a bridging Indian Deathlock (complete with dancing as she bends back) for the win at 2:52.

Scott Dawson and Garrett Dylan are in the back but their loud and annoying manager with a French accent. The manager isn’t named but it might be that Enzo Amore guy from last week.

Scott Dawson/Garrett Dylan vs. Brandon Traven/Jake Carter

Apparently the manager is named Sylvester LeFort. Dawson and Dylan look like Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch. Apparently LeFort is an eccentric French investor who travels the world looking for interesting business opportunities. That’s not one you hear everyday. Carter pounds away on Dawson in the corner to start but Scott sends him out to the floor to take over. A few knee drops get two before it’s off to Dylan.

Garrett hooks a chinlock on Carter for a bit as Maddox describes Dawson as someone who likely doesn’t flush. I’m not touching that one. Anyway Carter fights out and crawls between Dylan’s legs for the tag to Traven who is almost immediately clotheslined down. Dawson hits a spinebuster followed by a middle rope ax handle to a laid out Traven for the pin at 4:04.

Rating: D+. Not much here and I’m not all that wild on Dylan and Dawson. The manager has some potential but two good old boys (Maddox’s words) aren’t going to make me all that interested. They’re trying here, but guys named Garrett and Scott don’t really sounds all that intimidating you know?

Big E. Langston vs. Derrick Bateman

Bateman has a haircut which makes him look even more bland if that’s possible. Langston doesn’t have the I’m A Soldier part at the beginning of his music now. Bateman jumps Big E. to start but gets shoved down and thrown into the air to put him back down. Langston runs him over and the Big Ending ends Derrick at 58 seconds.

Another Big Ending sets up the five count post match.

The Raw ReBound is about the main event between Cena and Axel.

Next week it’s Ohno/Graves vs. the Wyatt Family.

Langston is on commentary for the battle royal. This should be awesome.

Battle Royal

Corey Graves, Sami Zayn, Bray Wyatt, Yoshi Tatsu, Kassius Ohno, Bo Dallas, Adrian Neville, Mason Ryan, Sakamoto, Briley Pierce, Alexander Rusev, Curt Hawkins, Knuckles Nelson, Baron Corbin, Aiden English, Conor O’Brien, Dante Dash, Mojo Rawley

I think I’ve got everyone in this listed. Ryan throws out Sakamoto and Pierce with ease and sends out Curt Hawkins and Alexander Rusev for good measure. Ohno and Wyatt keep brawling as everyone goes after Ryan. He throws them all off and screams a lot as Corbin and Nelson are tossed out. Rawley and Tatsu are out as is Dash.

English goes after Ryan and is thrown out with Zayn being thrown on top of them. Ryan has eliminated every single person so far and we’re barely two minutes into this. Mason loads up a powerbomb but Neville ranas him out to the floor. We’re down to Neville, Ohno, Wyatt, Dallas, O’Brien and Graves as we take a break. Back with Wyatt squaring off with O’Brien and Bray being kicked through the ropes very quickly, meaning he’s not eliminated.

Ohno knees Conor in the head and teams up with Graves to dump him out. Bray dumps Ohno and Graves at the same time, leaving us with three guys. Wyatt pounds on both guys in opposite corners and hits Sister Abigail on Dallas. Neville comes back with an enziguri and knocks Wyatt out before low bridging Dallas but the feet don’t touch.

Dallas sends Neville over the top but only one foot touches. Both guys get back in but Neville is backdropped to the apron. Dallas charges into a kick to the head to knock him down, but the Red Arrow hits Dallas’ knees. Neville is thrown out to give Dallas the win at 7:23 shown of 9:53.

Rating: D+. No matter how much fans loathe him, WWE has decided that Bo Dallas will be pushed to the moon in NXT and there’s nothing we can do about it. Maybe the teased heel turn will help him, but at this point a Dallas push does nothing to excite me at all. The fans didn’t react at all to him winning either, which is something you never see in NXT. Other than that, the only thing of note here was Ryan but it’s not like he’s going anywhere anytime soon.

Overall Rating: D+. This was probably the worst episode they’ve had in Florida. It was a night of squashes and a lame battle royal with a winner that isn’t the most popular guy in the world. The most interesting thing here though is the Divas Title tournament next week. Can you imagine Cole reminding us to be back next week for a Divas Title match? Dawson announced it here and it worked fine. Not an entertaining show tonight by any stretch.

Results

Wyatt Family b. Travis Tyler/Sawyer Fulton – Discus Lariat to Fulton

Emma b. Audrey Marie – Emma Lock

Scott Dawson/Garrett Dylan b. Brandon Traven/Jake Carter – Ax handle to Traven

Big E. Langston b. Derrick Bateman – Big Ending

Bo Dallas won a battle royal, last eliminating Adrian Neville

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2 comments

  1. Stormy says:

    Wow, and here I thought the Battle Royal was one of the best booked ones I’ve seen in a long ass time.

    I agree that I’m not fond of Bo Dallas winning (it should have been Neville), that Battle Royal made Ryan look great, Neville look great, didn’t hurt Bray Wyatt, and put over Bo Dallas. Most TV Battle Royals recently fail to make 1 person look good, here they made 4 look better then before.

    Oh, and what the fuck was that “dancing” Emma was doing? I’m using the term dancing very loosely, mind you, as it makes the Fandangoing dance look good.

    klunderbunker Reply:

    The dancing is designed to be goofy. She’s a really awkward person and a big klutz, which is kind of amusing.