Monday Night Raw – June 12, 1995: Feet. It’s About Feet.

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 12, 1995
Location: Struthers High School, Struthers, Ohio
Attendance: 1,450
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We continue down the long road to King of the Ring 1995 and it’s getting less scenic by the week. The main event this week is Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger in another King of the Ring qualifying match and hopefully it’s something that wasn’t taped a month in advance like last week’s Owen vs. Bulldog match. Let’s get to it.

We open with a Luger vs. Yokozuna video and Vince actually says Luger has the country in his corner. I doubt he has his crazy uncle Lou in his corner at this point. This gives us another clip of the Bodyslam Challenge but good night it’s amazing how far both of these guys have fallen in such a short amount of time. On top of that though, now I’ll have “I’ll Be Your Hero” in my head all day.

Cornette says Yokozuna will win.

Luger says he’ll win.

Opening sequence.

Bob Backlund was campaigning earlier today. Campaigning against rock and roll that is.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Duane Gill

Gill grabs a headlock and let’s forget all that as Diesel calls in to talk about the King of the Ring tag match with Bigelow against Sid/Tatanka. More shots to Bigelow have no effect and a suplex sets up the headbutt to end a match that was WAY more one sided for Gill than you would have expected.

Waylon Mercy (WOOT!) has a caterpillar crawling on his arm. He enjoys worms like this but he doesn’t enjoy worms crawling on him. When he gets in the ring, he won’t like wrestlers crawling on him and they’ll get smushed just like this worm. This was basically Bray Wyatt twenty years ago.

The Smoking Gunns play Pogs. Well they’re called Mad Caps but they’re Pogs.

Kama vs. David Haskins

This is during the time where Kama melted down Undertaker’s urn to continue a horrible feud, which included the Creatures of the Night (Undertaker fans) at ringside. Kama easily takes him down and tells Haskins to get up. Eventually Kama helps him out with that endeavor and plants David with a belly to belly for the pin. Of note: Vince plugged Mr. Mom airing on USA later in the week. No connection to the match of course but that’s a funny movie.

Kama rips up the Undertaker fans’ wreath.

King of the Ring control center with Sid/Tatanaka promising to beat Diesel and Bigelow at the pay per view, somehow incorporating Here Comes Mr. Jordan.

We go back to the arena to see Lawler holding up a hideous plastic foot covered in scabs and blisters. He promises even worse for Bret at King of the Ring. They’re really talking about how horrible feet will be at a pay per view match.

Back to the control center with some previews of the first round matches. Shawn Michaels vs. Kama is considered a big match. Think about that for a minute: Shawn vs. the Godfather.

Yokozuna is eating rice to warm up.

Man Mountain Rock vs. Bob Cook

Before the match, we get an awesome guitar solo from Rock. That’s far more entertaining than the match, which is a total squash with Rock winning with a Fujiwara armbar in less than a minute.

Hall of Fame report, including Antonino Rocca, Ernie Ladd, Ivan Putski, Fabulous Moolah, Pedro Morales the Grand Wizard and George Steele. It’s really just a listing of the inductees.

Bob Backlund knocks over Man Mountain Rock’s guitar and kicks it around in his quest against rock and roll. This turns into a rant against Rolling Rock and Frozen Tea before he attacks a cameraman.

Tekno Team 2000 vs. Mike Khoury/John Crystal

Tekno Team 2000 is comprised of Travis and Troy (Erik Watts) and are considered one of the worst teams ever as they didn’t exactly have a gimmick but kept their jobs for a long time anyway. Oh and they sucked. Like really sucked. Troy takes Mike down with ease to start before it’s off to Crystal who gets caught in an armbar. Khoury gets in a shot to Troy’s back but he clotheslines them down and brings Travis in. This isn’t exactly thrilling stuff in case you can’t tell. Travis hits a spinning high cross body for the pin on Mike.

Rating: D-. To give you an idea of how bad Tekno Team 2000 was, even WWE has made fun of them over the years. As stuck WWE can be on itself, you know it has to be a big deal for them to admit that one of their ideas was so horrible. Bad match here and it was easy to see how far the team was going to go.

Man Mountain Rock is devastated over the damage to his guitar.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Lex Luger vs. Yokozuna

Scott Anton (Scotty Riggs) of all people carries Luger’s American flag to the ring. Of all the people they could have gone with, they picked him to carry the flag? They stare each other down to start before Luger’s opening right hands actually fire the crowd up. It’s already off to the arm but Yokozuna sends Luger into the buckle. Lex rams him head first into the buckle over and over, which Vince thinks might make him LOCOzuna. Well done at actually making me groan out loud.

Yokozuna needs time to get back inside in a tease of Summerslam 1993 because we needed to think of that again. Back inside and a Mr. Fuji distraction lets Yokozuna pound Luger down as we take a break. As you might expect we come back to a chinlock before Yokozuna pulls him down by the hair. Luger makes his real comeback with the clotheslines, including the middle rope version to drop Yokozuna. Fuji beats up Anton though and steals the flag, only to have Luger take it right back. Yokozuna posts Lex and drops a leg, setting up the countout win. Well at least…..never mind actually as there’s no way to spin this for Luger.

Rating: D. Another bad match here but what else can you expect when you have Yokozuna barely able to move and a match this bad? Luger was so far past his prime here and it was getting sad to see them try to push him as anything important. It really says a lot when Yokozuna looks more motivated than anyone in a match but somehow we actually reached that point here.

We finally get Lawler’s training video, which consists of him walking in horse manure. When does Nitro debut again?

We get a clip of Lawler beating Aldo Montoya on Superstars and then forcing some foot kissing.

Overall Rating: D-. This show is about disgusting feet. Not the World Title or the upcoming King of the Ring tournament, but about how disgusting Jerry Lawler’s feet are. How we’ve reached this point is beyond me but my goodness this is actually worse than I thought it was going to be. Horrible show here and I have a feeling it’s only going to get worse.

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