Monday Night Raw – August 14, 1995: Sloppy Sloppy Slopping

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 14, 1995
Location: Worcester Memorial Auditorium, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 4,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Ted DiBiase

We’re closing in on Summerslam and that’s great news, mainly because it means we can get away from this era in a hurry. There’s actually an interesting main event tonight as Jerry Lawler faces Shawn Michaels. I mean, it’s not going to be as interesting as it could be if this was about fifteen years older for Lawler but there’s potential there. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of last week’s show as Mabel injured Michaels’ back.

Lawler thinks he can end Michaels’ career with one right hand.

Opening sequence.

Doink the Clown vs. Waylon Mercy

Mercy is similar to Bray Wyatt but far less talented in the ring. Doink won’t shake his hand to start but does score with some early armdrags. The trip to the floor just annoys Mercy, who actually hides in the corner. One heck of a clothesline sets up a sleeper (complete with Mercy’s eyes bugging out) for the win. Ignore the KILL THE CLOWN chants at the end.

Rating: D. Mercy had some serious potential but my goodness his in-ring stuff wasn’t working. It didn’t work when he was known as Dan Spivey and it doesn’t work here as Mercy. Unfortunately a back injury would cut his career off before the character could go anywhere as it always had my attention while it lasted.

Goldust, in some rather different looking attire than he would be known for, is standing in front of a Hollywood green screen to talk about how much he loves this town. He talks about learning technique in acting 101 and being a star from the day he was born. Goldust wants Diesel and….I’m not sure actually as I can barely hear his whispering. It’s odd to see him with the big gold robe and just gold paint on his face. This would get better, eventually.

Henry Godwinn comes out to slop Ted DiBiase for saying some insulting things about him on commentary. Dok Hendrix comes out to replace him.

Smoking Gunns vs. Bill Garrett/Cody Wade

Bart works on Garrett’s arm to start before it’s off to Wade. That’s fine with the Gunns who finish him with the Sidewinder in a hurry. Just a squash.

Dean Douglas isn’t happy with the way Bret Hart hooks legs, meaning there’s no excellence to his execution. It’s so bad that it earns Bret an F, which isn’t quite as good as a 4/10.

Shawn says he’s fine and Lawler should worry about himself.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Jeff Hardy

Well ok then. Vince and Dok make fun of Jeff’s attire, which would really be a sign of things to come. Helmsley misses a charge in the corner and gets dropkicked, only to have Hardy miss a crossbody. An elbow to the head sets up the Pedigree for the easy pin. Get used to jobbing to this guy Jeff.

Summerslam Insider time. This week we take a quick look at some matches on the card with none of them getting enough attention to go anywhere. Added this weekend: Skip vs. Barry Horowitz and 1-2-3 Kid vs. Hakushi. Well one of them works at least. No one even got any interview time this week.

Henry Godwinn vs. Russ Greenburg

Joined in progress for some reason with Henry hammering away and finishing with the Slop Drop in very short order.

Russ gets slopped for a bonus.

Jerry Lawler and Isaac Yankem take care of a woman’s teeth. WHY IS BRET HART FEUDING WITH AN EVIL DENTIST???

Before the main event, the 1-2-3 Kid and Savio Vega play with the WWF version of Pogs. Sweet goodness 1995 was a scary time.

Shawn Michaels vs. Jerry Lawler

Non-title. Lawler hits him in the ribs to start so Shawn slides between his legs to speed things up. We hit the BURGER KING chant until Lawler misses a right hand (Lawler: “HERE’S A WHOPPER FOR YOU!”). Instead he tries the piledriver but Shawn lands on his hands for the save.

Cue Sid to pick up the Intercontinental Title as Shawn is sent over the corner and outside with a big crash. Back from a break with Lawler grabbing a suplex and a DDT for a rather delayed two. Shawn rolls away from a top rope splash and slugs away, followed by a top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music connects but Sid comes in for the DQ. You know, because Lawler can’t take a fall.

Rating: C-. I’m still not sure what the point was in the ending but at least Shawn didn’t lose or anything. Then again this was a different era and they weren’t dumb enough to have champions lose right and left. Not terrible here as Shawn was on fire at this time, though it was only going to be so good.

Post match Sid hammers on Shawn until Razor makes the save. They get in a fight over who gets to hold the Intercontinental Title because Razor seems to be a bit of a thief. Diesel has to come out to break things up to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Pretty terrible show here as they didn’t get anything important in and Summerslam is looking weaker and weaker every time. You would think they could get in something with the #1 contender to the WWF World Title but nah, the real money around here is in having Henry Godwinn slop people. Is there any doubt why the show was so horrible around this time?

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