Impact – February 24, 2011 – One Big Preview For Next Week

Impact
Date: February 24, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
Episode Title: Hot At Teacher

The main story tonight is that Dixie Carter has promised a major announcement that will change the wrestling world at the end of the show.  Given that TNA makes about one of these a month, I’m not exactly on the edge of my seat but one time they said this and it was Kurt Angle so there’s always a chance.  Other than that this is the last show before we get to the March 3^rd show which won’t be in Orlando.  Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with Hardy beating RVD in a “ratings grab” which drew one of the lower ratings of the year.  Maybe if you had advertised the world title match for longer than an hour and a half that would work.  We also recap Flair turning heel (was he ever face?) and it’s AJ vs. Flair tonight.

Anderson comes into the ring with a chair and sits down in the middle of the ring.  He doesn’t care who’s calling the shots here because right now he’s in charge.  He’s sitting there in that spot until he gets his rematch because his contract says he gets one.  Anderson isn’t sure why the network doesn’t like him but it might be because he’s a jerk.  He says RVD isn’t exactly a law abiding citizen, and here’s Van Dam with a rebuttal.

RVD wants to know about the laws of morality, which is about not feeding your friends to the sharks to get ahead.  Basically Van Dam is mad because he thinks Anderson has plans which RVD is standing in the way of.  This is about the low blow that Hardy got in on Van Dam that Anderson missed.  Van Dam says he’s better whether Anderson likes it or not.

Anderson says that all that matters is getting his rematch, but  before they both do something they regret, and then that’s all he manages to say as Van Dam drills him.  They brawl for a bit until security comes out for the save.  Cue Bischoff and Immortal minus Jeff Hardy with Eric saying he thinks he has a main event, which is a shame as Anderson was going to get a rematch until he saw this.  Jeff Jarrett whispers into Eric’s ear and Eric says good idea.  They add Angle in because we need a triple threat I guess.

Scott Steiner vs. Rob Terry in a posedown later.

Steiner says he’s been doing six ounce curls with James Storm Beer.  Eric Young pops up behind him doing poses and Steiner throws him out.  Young has darker hair now it seems.

The Jarretts look at wedding dresses.  This doesn’t go well as Karen doesn’t like anything and gets annoyed but reminds herself she’s still a princess so everything is ok.

Kurt says he can’t give her away fast enough next week and there will be a wedding we’ll never forget.  Also he’s sorry to Anderson/RVD but he’s not in a ood move.

Gunner/Murphy vs. Orlando Jordan/Eric Young

 

Beer Money is on commentary here.  Yep it’s a comedy match as Young starts with I think that’s Gunner and we get a LONG crisscross, as in like a minute long.  Gunner and Murphy finally take over and hammer away on Young for a bit and we hit the chinlock.  Off to Murphy and Young’s blue shorts are ripped off to reveal regular tights that I think have a Mapleleaf on them.  Gunner and Murphy hit a combination side slam/top rope elbow for the pin on Young at 3:27.  I don’t think Jordan was ever in the match.  Gunner/Murphy vs. Beer Money next week.

Rating: C. Just a basic squash here which is exactly what Gunner/Murphy needed to get themselves up a bit before next week.  That’s why you have jobbers and Young and Jordan are perfect for it.  Decent little match that did exactly what it was supposed to do for both teams.

Angelina tries to talk Velvet out of putting her career on the line and is brushed off for the most part.

After a break here’s D-Von to apologize to his sons for letting Bully Ray (he calls him Bubba here) hurt them, putting them through a table and kicking them in the face.  D-Von looks very emotional here and says he should have been there to protect them.  He says this will not go unanswered but is interrupted by Ray on the monitor.

In the back he’s got someone down in front of him who we can’t see but he keeps hitting.  Raw asks how D-Von’s kids are and then says that so D-Von will never forget what Ray did to his kids.  Apparently that’s D-Von’s brother and he’s going to put him through a table.  D-Von just stands there and apparently doesn’t care.  Did his brother stiff him on the bill at Olive Garden or something?  Tommy Dreamer pops up to make the save and takes Ray into the Impact Zone but security breaks it up.  D-Von accidentally hits Tommy.

Madison says she doesn’t need Tara’s help in the open challenge tonight.

AJ says he’s not taking a backseat to anyone anymore.

Crimson vs. Magnus

 

This is Crimson’s singles debut.  Magnus says that Crimson and he are a lot alike.  They’re both muscular and ambitious etc but Magnus is more of all of them.  Also he’s not carrying Angle’s bags.  After he says this, pain begins happening to him.  Crimson drills him for awhile until Magnus gets a Stunner on the top rope.  He sets for some kind of driver but Magnus counters into a spinning Rock Bottom into a Downward Spiral for the pin at 1:20.  Not even a squash because Magnus might have been on offense longer.  The move is called Red Alert apparently.

RVD says there are a lot of goals he’s going to try to reach tonight but he’s not sure why Eric made this match.

Time for the posedown.  Terry is in shorts and barefoot.  He says he’s the genetic freak so let’s do it.  He’s already one step up on the other Welshman in wrestling in Mason Ryan.  You can understand Terry.  Steiner comes out in a suit.  He says he’s the real genetic freak and has been since Terry was sucking on his mom’s *censored*.  Terry should be called Chernobyl because he’s a few vitamins away from a chemical explosion.

Steiner says that he’s going to go put his gear on rather than coming out here in speedos like a Chippendale.  Terry says that’s just like an American as he’s running when someone bigger and stronger and faster is challenging them.  Steiner turns to take the suit jacket off and Terry hits him with the dumbbell he brought with him.  Steiner gets choked out by the bands that Terry had also.

Velvet comes into her locker room and Winter is there.  Winter says that people are doubting Velvet’s abilities in her match with Sarita next week but Winter isn’t one of them.  Velvet says when she’s done with Sarita she’s coming for Winter’s.  Velvet leaves and Winter smiles evily.

Flair is coming to the ring despite his match being later.

The Jarretts talk to a minister and Karen keeps interrupting everyone.  It’s about Kurt apparently.  The minister hears what they’re planning and says “Oh Lord”, calling it blasphemy.  A minister just summed up this storyline in a nutshell.

Here’s Flair who says it’s hard to be humble when you’re the Nature Boy and therefore God.  He says he might give girl at ringside a shot at Space Mountain.  The fans cheer for him and he says he knows who he is already.  Flair says AJ has one more chance to apologize on his hands and knees before God.  Beer Money and Kaz will get their chances later.

Here’s AJ and Flair tells So Cal Val to open the ropes for AJ but AJ stops her.  Flair’s smile is almost creepy here.  AJ starts to talk but Flair says the fans aren’t needed here because we have a man talking to a God.  AJ isn’t going to beat up Flair tonight because if Flair gets to AJ then Flair wins.  Flair says that Fourtune wasn’t supposed to do anything without Flair.  He even offered James Storm 100 beers last night but Storm wouldn’t do it.

AJ says that if Flair had known what was coming then Flair would have tried to stop them.  Flair says he was trying to show Fourtune how to be great but tonight he’s going to teach them respect.  Flair slaps the taste out of AJ’s mouth and the fight is on.  Hernandez runs out for the save but is thrown over the top and out to the floor by AJ.  Styles goes after Flair again but Hernandez comes back.

Taz and Tenay aren’t sure if Hernandez is officially with Immortal or not.  What part of “Do you want to be in Immortal?” “Yes” Do they not get?  AJ beats up both guys and Flair is, say it with me, BUSTED OPEN.  AJ beats them down again but Hernandez makes a third save and finally takes AJ down.  Ok scratch that as AJ hits a plancha to take Hernandez down for the third time.

And since it’s a Flair segment Flair’s clothes are ripped off.  Styles Clash is attempted but it’s one pose too many as Hernandez comes in for a fourth time and FINALLY they get AJ down.  Fourtune finally runs down for the save.  Morgan pops up and drills Hernandez.  Fourtune stands tall and Morgan leaves Hernandez laying in the crowd/back.

Anderson says he’ll do what he’s always done and get by the odds.  He’s in this for the world title and it’s tunnel vision for him.

Hogan is coming back next week.  As opposed to when he was supposed to come back on 2/3.  This comes with a recap video of the THEY storyline.  The Final Verdict in the court case is next week.

Madison Rayne vs. ???

 

This is a non-title open challenge.  Madison talks about all the Knockouts she’s knocked out and how she’s getting bored.  The first challenger is the returning ODB now with black hair.  ODB hits a Thesz Press and a slam to take Madison down very quickly.  Bronco Buster misses so ODB rubs her crotch a bit.

Madison does that humping the mat thing where the other girl’s head is rammed into the mat.  She tries to do it again and ODB fights her off and runs her over a few times.  Fallaway Slam sets up a nip up and then the Bronco Buster.  She sets Madison into a Fireman’s Carry but Madison escapes and gets a combination swinging neckbreaker/knee to the back of the head of ODB to end it at 3:50.

Rating: D+. Any match that has a woman rubbing her crotch on national TV is a match I have some issues with.  This was nothing special at all and Madison continues to dominate.  This Queen Bee thing isn’t doing anything at all for me as it’s rather boring.  I don’t get why they didn’t go with Mickie but whatever.

Velvet goes to talk to Sarita and Sarita says it’ll be one on one and a fair match with the career on the line.  Velvet leaves and Sarita/Rosita crack up laughing.

Main event is next.

Morgan says that was comeuppance for Hernandez because Hernandez cost Morgan the title.  Apparently they’re fighting next week.

Jeff Jarrett gets a fitting for his tuxedo and apparently Kurt is going to need one also.  Karen still won’t shut up.  Jeff says he’s tired of this princess stuff.  Karen says that’s good because now she’s a queen.  Jarrett gets his suit and that’s about it.

We recap J-Woww showing up to yell at Cookie.  J-Woww said she might be back.  Cookie and Robbie says they’re going to have one of the other Jersey Shore girls call out J-Woww.  Sadly enough this is probably going to get a better rating than anything else they’ve done in awhile which means we’ll see more of it.

Rob Van Dam vs. Mr. Anderson vs. Kurt Angle

 

This is for the #1 contender spot apparently.  We take a break before the opening bell.  Here we are and Anderson is double teamed to start.  Double suplex puts Anderson down which Van Dam was almost on his feet still while Angle was on his back.  Angle is sent to the floor and RVD hits a monkey flip on Anderson.  Angle back in now and the beating continues.  Rolling Thunder is attempted on both but only hits Kurt.

This turns into a regular triple threat with everyone fighting everyone until RVD takes out both guys on the floor and we take a break.  Back with Anderson on the floor and Van Dam taking Angle down with a spinkick.  A monkey flip is blocked but RVD gets the standing moonsault for two.  Angle is sent to the floor and Anderson is back in.  RVD takes him down with a middle rope kick but Angle is back in now.

Clotheslines for everyone as Angle is dominant.  Suplexes for both guys and Anderson gets Rolling Germans.  Angle Slam to Anderson but RVD kicks Angle in the face.  Five Star is blocked by the running belly to belly.  Mic Check is blocked and Angle hits a T-Bone and sets for the ankle lock but Here Comes the Bride plays and here are the Jarretts.  They kiss in the aisle and the distraction lets Anderson Mic Check Angle for the pin at approximately 10:00 shown of 13:12.

Rating: C+. I’m not a fan of these matches at all but this wasn’t bad I guess.  They did about what you would expect them to do and while it wasn’t bad, it was nothing out of the ordinary.  Anderson continues to be the title chaser which he was already since he had a title rematch, but at least it’s official now.

We run down the card for next week:

The Jersey Shore stuff

Bart Scott of the New York Jets

Velvet vs. Sarita

Morgan vs. Hernandez

Gunner/Murphy vs. Beer Money

The Wedding Vows

Dixie and Hogan’s Final Verdict

Taz says there’s some new footage so we’re going to go to it.  There’s a guy walking in the rain and up some stairs.  It says 3-3-11 and my eyes roll.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a massive commercial for next week and on that front it was ok.  The main event was fine despite me not being a fan at all of three way dances.  I still fail to see the point of having everything put on more or less two matches but thankfully they’ve added some other stuff to flesh next week out a bit.  It’ll be nice to see it in a place that isn’t the Impact Zone though, if nothing else to see who is over and who isn’t.  Anyway, not bad this week but nothing great.

Results

Gunner/Murphy b. Orlando Jordan/Eric Young – Side Slam/Elbow Drop combination to Young

Crimson b. Magnus – Red Alert

Madison Rayne b. ODB – Swinging Neckbreaker/Knee to the Neck

Mr. Anderson b. Rob Van Dam and Kurt Angle – Mic Check to Angle