This was announced on Raw tonight. This is…A pretty good idea. Miz is a guy that can go out there and do whatever for about 30-40 minutes if need be. You can have him do stuff like the Shawn role in 95 or Benoit/Orton in 04. Someone like that has to be there and Miz is as good a choice as any to have in there for a good chunk of the match until the main people get in.
Thoughts?
Royal Rumble 2007
Date: January 28, 2007
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 13,500
Commentators: JBL, Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Jim Ross
Well, there are two main differences here. First off is ECW is back. They’re still complete and utter crap as they tried to be a legit place and not AAA, so take that for what it’s worth. The other thing is Angle is gone, having went to TNA where he still is today in a SHOCKER. That’s not hyperbole either as it legitimately was a stunning turn of events. This was the first real step for TNA to show that they were legit and it’s still an awesome moment to this day.
As for the people still on Vince’s payroll, we have Batista vs. Kennedy and Cena vs. Umaga in a last man standing match, both of which are of course for the titles. If nothing else these are perfect Rumble title matches so let’s get to this show. Also, something historic happens here which I’ll get to later on.
The intro is the standard thing about the title matches and the Rumble, with the main focus being on the Rumble and Cena. That’s fine. They do however mess up and say that the Road to Mania has been around for 20 years now. No it hasn’t, as the Mania tie in didn’t become official until 93. Look back at the first two shows: Duggan won, and wound up losing in the first round of the tournament.
In 89 Studd won and was a guest referee at Mania. This may be relatively common knowledge, but just in case someone here hasn’t noticed, Vince likes to rewrite history every now and then. This is being billed as the most star studded Rumble in history. I haven’t looked at the entrants but I’m guessing that’s not true given some of the shows I’ve seen. Oh and the ECW guys are Extremists here.
Hardys vs. MNM
Melina is amazing looking to say the least. I know I often say that there’s no real point to this feud, but in this case there really isn’t much of one. MNM had broken up as the Hardys had reunited but rather than as a team they’re more like two singles guys teaming, which I usually hate but the history together makes it ok.
The Hardys were on a Survivor Series team together so they restarted the team and for the awful December 2 Dismember show (we’ll get to that someday) they threw out an open challenge which MNM accepted. This was supposed to be a one night reunion so the next month when they teamed up again in a 4 team TLC match, Mercury took one of the sickest bumps ever which was completely by accident.
Paul London did the seesaw thing with a ladder where he jumped on one side to launch the other up and the corner slammed into Mercury’s face and completely shattered his nose and part of his eye. It looked awful and he’s still got a protective mask on. Jeff is the IC Champion here. Oh and they’re the Hardys, not the Hardy Boys. You can really see the strides Nitro (Morrison) has made here and it’s impressive. Apparently Matt has a dislocated jaw.
They actually bring up a decent point here as they say that since Matt has a bad jaw, he hasn’t been able to eat solid food and might not have his peak energy. For once, that works. Jeff’s pop is epic. The beauty of the way the Hardys fight is that even if they botch the heck out of most of what they do, it fits their style and it could be believable that they meant to do that. Melina is letting loose those screams which I actually like.
Ross says he hasn’t made a lot of women scream. I’ll leave that one up to you guys. Jeff is so spotty that it’s insane. I usually don’t notice it, but DANG he’s bad here. This match feels like they were told to go out there and have an epic tag match rather than just having one and that’s not a good thing. MNM is ok, but at the same time this match is just sloppy and that’s hurting it a lot.
The crowd is about half into this but at the same time they’re not into it if that makes sense. Ross mentions that this is a one fall match to open the show. Why don’t they have more 2/3 falls matches? Those can be fun when they’re done right but you never see them again.
Matt gets the hot tag to start completely dominating the match. The usual double finisher ends it which was really quite lackluster. Oh and apparently Matt is on Smackdown and Jeff is on Raw, completely going against the theory of the freaking brand split as it comes closer and closer to dying every year.
Rating: B-. This just wasn’t that good. I like that they were trying to have a big time tag match, but these teams just weren’t clicking. It was FAR better at December 2 Dismember, but I think here that they were trying to top that match which was just a bad idea. This match was all kinds of sloppy and the ending wasn’t anything special. This was ok at its best and too long at its worst.
We go to the back where Teddy Long and Coach are running the drawing and Kelly is there barely dressed. Edge shows up, leading to him calling Coach Coacher and Coach calling Edge Edger. Take me now. Kelly was still an exhibitionist at the time and loved to tell everyone that. Rated RKO were the tag champions here so Orton shows up. Let the gay jokes begin. King Booker shows up to make fun of them as this is just rather stupid and unfunny.
Ad for the All Grown Up Wrestlemania, which was a campaign I actually liked for a change.
Thanks to a band we’ve never heard of for a song that has no bearing on the show and won’t be heard again.
We recap Test vs. Lashley, which more or less consisted of Test “dominating” ECW and wanting a title match because of it. There was a triple threat with RVD in there somewhere too that meant nothing at all. Test is apparently an impact player.
ECW Title: Test vs. Bobby Lashley
Take a wild guess as to how this is going to go. Just take a guess. Test was a guy that Vince kept trying to push but it never worked. That might have had something to do with Test having all the momentum in the world and Vince pushing Big Show instead back in 99 when Austin left. Oh yeah Big Show is gone now too. Lashley was another guy that Vince was seemingly ready to pull the trigger on but never got to do so which kind of sucks.
Lashley does the Lesnar entrance where he jumps to the apron and the pyro goes off. That would be more impressive if X-Pac wasn’t the first guy to do it often. There’s no big match feeling here at all. This is as basic of a match as you could imagine. It’s like they were reading a book about how to have a power vs. power match.
Lashley dominates for awhile, Test sends him into the post, Lashley gets a short comeback, Test hits the big boot and Lashley kicks out, so Test walks out. Seriously, that’s the entire 8 minute match.
Rating: D-. What in the world was the point of this? What was the point of ECW as a whole back then? When did we reach the point where ECW had a back then? Anyway, this was really weak as there was just no point to this whatsoever and the match completely failed. Lashley wasn’t that solid yet and Test didn’t help matters in the slightest. This didn’t go well at all and it showed badly here. Horrible match with a stupid finish.
Cena is in the back getting looked at by the doctor. Umaga injured his ribs the Monday before. Vince comes in and says that Cena won’t be able to forfeit as Cena can’t see him. I really hate Vince at times.
No Way Out promo. My goodness that was an AWFUL show.
We recap Kennedy vs. Batista. The idea here is that Kennedy has beaten 6 world champions in a year, so he’s getting a title shot here. Kennedy won a Beat the Clock Sprint to get the shot. I’ve always liked that idea, at least to an extent. I think Kennedy stole Norcal’s shirt.
Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Mr. Kennedy
Kennedy cuts a promo before the match saying exactly what you would expect him to say. Kennedy had no official move yet so he’s unlikely to win. I think it was a neckbreaker or a DDT or something like that but he changed it every week. JBL keeps trying to offer analysis and keeps yelling at Cole for interrupting him which gets funny. At least it’s not Joey Styles because he would have a black eye from it.
Kennedy uses a weird as heck looking leg lock. Imagine a figure four, but with the guy that’s in it on his stomach. It looked rather awesome. A knee to the leg causes JBL to declare that’s how you win a world title. I thought it was by getting a pin or a submission on a world champion in a title match but what do I know? This is mainly Kennedy working on the knee, which is smart but it’s the safe way to go.
With Kennedy being allegedly the future of the company, shouldn’t he do something that’s a bit more interesting or fresh? Batista makes his comeback, actually selling the knee (PAY ATTENTION TAKER!) and goes for the Bomb. It doesn’t work though as Kennedy shoves him into the referee.
He gets a low blow and the neckbreaker but we have no referee. There’s a very loud and very noticeable Kennedy chant, which thankfully was listened to this year as he would win MITB. However, due to about 1000 injuries nothing would come of it. Batista hits the Batista Bomb for the easy win. JBL freaking out over it is kind of funny.
Rating: B-. This was pretty good for what it was I thought. It wasn’t supposed to be a classic showdown but rather a token title defense for Batista so that he could manage to get something else under his belt and get Kennedy the title shot that he had earned. There’s nothing at all wrong with that and it worked. The match itself wasn’t that great, but the point here wasn’t to have a great match but to make Batista and Kennedy look good and that’s what happened.
Hornswoggle shows up to pick his number. He beats up Coach after getting one. Oh looks it’s Khali and Horny because that joke never gets old. He takes three of them and leaves two, allowing Kelly to make a balls joke and Ron Simmons to show up to validate his existence.
The Marine is on DVD.
Mania promo, set to Ladies and Gentlemen by Saliva. They actually mention that at their concerts. Saliva is in the crowd.
So Umaga had been an unbeatable monster that challenged Cena for the title at New Year’s Revolution but lost so naturally he gets another title match at the Rumble. The idea is that Cena could barely keep Umaga down for three so ten is impossible. Umaga crushed Cena with a splash through a table at Raw. You know, I wonder how you can have more than one last man standing match. Wouldn’t that mean there have been more than one last men standing, which is impossible?
Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Umaga
The end of the video package sounded like Taker’s music for some reason. Ok I’m back now, as Lillian with her hair pulled back and more or less wearing a swimsuit as it’s a top that ties behind her neck and one of those nearly invisible skirts she wears. Lawler says that Umaga reminds him of King Kong. You know, the guy that lost in the end. The start is of course, Cena getting his face kicked in by Umaga because he’s injured and can’t breathe.
And you know, because Umaga is a monster and Cena is the second coming of Hogan so naturally he has to be beaten down to get us to the big comeback at the end of the match. This was around three months into Cena’s year long reign that made him the most hated man in wrestling. On a completely unrelated note, Lee, Ricky and I joined the forums about three weeks before this show. Umaga puts the steps into the ring but when Cena lifts them, it’s an amazing feat of strength.
He throws them at the Samoan, but here it looks awful as the camera shows perfectly the Umaga takes it on his hands. When Kane did the same spot a few months ago, it looked and sounded great. This looked like them trying to replicate it and failing miserably. We get a bearhug, which at least makes sense here. The fans want tables. I could go for a nice lawn chair actually.
The steps are put up in the corner and Umaga does the hip ramming but misses which would actually hurt. That and a step shot gets a 7. The announcers are completely pro Cena here and aren’t even trying to be diplomatic. The formula here is Cena gets beaten up, Umaga dominates, Cena hits a big move to draw even then Umaga puts him down again. The genius that is Cena figures that the Five Knuckle Shuffle is better than slamming Umaga on the steps.
He goes for an FU but in a SICK looking spot, Umaga falls forward and Cena’s head apparently slams into the steps being crushed by Umaga’s fatness. That’s just as painful looking. On a second look it might have landed on the part of the steps with nothing there but still it looked great. That gets 9 and also a LOUD Cena sucks chant. After taking another beating, Cena hulks up but takes a Samoan Drop to put him back down. I really hate the Spike.
It was just freaking stupid on so many levels that it’s unreal. Seriously, look at Umaga and the stuff he does, and then his finishing move is a thumb to the neck. That’s just freaking DUMB. Ross calls Umaga Youmaga, so maybe that’s where Regal got that from. He hits the post so Cena nails him with a monitor as Umaga decides to take a nap there I guess.
Cena is bleeding from the step crushing by the way. We hit the floor so Cena hits post. The no selling by Umaga is getting a bit annoying but it’s quite bearable. At least they have their stereotypes right here as nothing is hurting his head. With Cena draped over the announce tables, Umaga gets a running start and runs down the tables to go for a splash on Cena which of course misses.
I’m glad as if Cena had gotten up from that it would have been completely ridiculous. That gets a LONG 9 which the fans boo the heck out of. For some reason Lawler thinks you have to be in the ring to answer the ten, which is just stupid but it’s Lawler so it’s expected. Estrada gets some metal thing and takes the ring apart to hand Umaga the turnbuckle, as in the part that hooks up to the post. Of course Cena ducks and hits an FU.
Thankfully he’s up before the referee starts counting as it would have been ridiculous if he stayed down. However it gets dumber as after a metal shot puts him down, Cena puts the STFU on Umaga using the ropes to choke him out.
For some reason Umaga completely no sells the first attempt and is up almost immediately after Cena lets go but Cena does it again to keep him down for ten in what I would assume was miscommunication. That’s your lesson for the day kids: it’s ok to take a rope and tie it around a guy’s neck for about 20 seconds until he stops moving and breathing, as long as you keep your title!
Rating: C. This was about as much of a textbook example of a last man standing match as you could have asked for. What I mean by that is that it was about as safe of one as you were going to get. I don’t think anyone bought that Umaga was a legit threat to the belt so take that for what it’s worth.
The match is certainly ok, but it’s little more than that, which I guess is to be expected in something like this. It ended this rivalry though and gave Cena another successful title defense so that makes up for some stuff I suppose. Not bad, but not great at all.
Commercial for Mania.
Flair draws his number.
Royal Rumble
Lillian is amazing, period. Flair is first, continuing his horrific run of luck for Rumble draws as this is the 3rd time that I can think of where he draws in the first 3 spots. Finlay is number two which is certainly an odd pairing. History is altered again as Flair has now not made it an hour in 1992, despite according to Monsoon making it about 70 minutes that year. We have 90 second intervals here in case you were wondering.
Cole makes it sound like this is for the title. It’s not, which is why it’s a bad idea. Kenny Dykstra, who allegedly was a great talent which I never saw, is 3rd. He and Flair were feuding I think. He was a year old when the first Rumble happened. That’s just scary as Flair was like a 5 time world champion back then. Finlay is heel here in case you were wondering. Matt Hardy is 4th. Lawler, JBL and Cole are doing the commentary here.
Since there’s no JR they can actually get words in edgewise. JBL says this is the closest thing in wrestling to an endurance contest. Other than you know, the iron man match which is an endurance contest. Edge is 5th. The first five have been Raw Smackdown Raw Smackdown Raw. That’s rather odd. Flair goes through the ropes and goes to get a chair. He and Edge have been feuding for awhile too. Does no one like Flair?
Flair goes out and then Dykstra follows him as Dreamer is 6th. You know what the chant is already. Finlay knocks everyone down and oddly enough is dominating. JBL says Lawler hid for 30 minutes in 1996 because he thought there was a young woman under the ring. That actually made me laugh. Sabu of all people is 7th. Naturally he gets a table which Cole says he’s made a career out of.
That’s either a thinly veiled insult or a general observation. Given that it’s Cole, I’d say it’s the later as I don’t think he’s intelligent enough to know how to thinly veil something. He makes up for it by knowing all of Sabu’s attributes which is actually impressive. Helms is Gregory Helms, still the Cruiserweight Champion that he became last year. We have Finlay, Hardy, Edge, Dreamer, Sabu and Helms at the moment.
We get our second Sabu chant in less than three minutes which makes me shake my head very hard. Helms has been wanting to stop being a cruiserweight at the time. In other words he wants to have a career. Shelton is 9th. They tease about 4 people going through the table but no one goes through it. Lawler points out that if used right it could save someone, which is actually true.
Kane gets us to double digits and of course we hear about all of his records, including most consecutive rumbles and 11 guys thrown out. And yet he can’t get a 4 week world title reign. Dreamer and Sabu are tossed easily, with Sabu being chokeslammed through the table. Well at least they made it quick. CM MOTHER PUNK is 11th. Good night I hate how far they’ve depushed him lately.
He was supposed to have a twenty minute war with Lashley to end the Elimination Chamber at December 2 Dismember so that both guys would be made at once. Heyman thought that up. Punk was also supposed to make Show tap out in that match in about 5 minutes. Show, who was losing the title to Lashley anyway, had no problem with that and since he would be leaving in two days anyway had no problem putting Punk over really strong on his way out.
Vince of course HATED this and had RVD pin him first, leaving the likes of Test and Hardcore Holly, you know, REAL MAIN EVENT GUYS to battle it out instead. Naturally the fans HATED this as Punk was incredibly over and no one wanted to see Holly and Test in a main event. Vince of course blamed Heyman and he was fired as a result.
Punk would get the ECW Title in October and begin the biggest launch in company history, breaking the record for fastest time to win the Triple Crown, with the ECW title thrown in as a bonus. He has since tapped to Cena in 2 minutes at the Slammies and who knows what else as we’re 9 days from Christmas when this is being written and you’ll read it in about 5 weeks.
King Booker is 12th, about ten months before jumping to TNA. He puts Helms out in about 4 seconds. Super Crazy is 13th. Nothing happens. Jeff Hardy is 14th and hopefully something happens here. The Hardys of course work together and hook a move called the Spin Cycle on Crazy before fighting Kane which I like for some reason that I don’t understand.
Sandman, to a song that sounds nothing like Metallica is 15th. He gets a great cane shot to Jeff and a few others but Booker puts him out in about 15 seconds. Thanks for that. Orton is 16th. He and Edge, the tag champions, put out Crazy and the Hardys inside of a minute. In at 17 is Benoit, in his final Rumble. He’s US Champion here because that’s all he’s ever done. The announcers talk about Punk like he’s a jobber or something.
Oh I forgot he was on ECW at the time. RVD is 18th, just about to be gone from the company. He would be gone I think in June. Kane puts Booker out so he goes back in and puts Kane out. They fought at No Way Out and that was the end of it. They fight for awhile until Viscera comes out at 19th. He’s wearing white pajamas so there we are. Nitro is 20th. Nothing of note is going on here.
More or less it’s just a lot of guys making sure that they get close to being thrown out without actually doing so. Kevin Thorn, the guy that just never got pushed is 21st. Shelton gets insanely close and keeps off the floor which is indeed impressive. Oh for the love of goodness Hardcore Holly is 22nd. Still, nothing of note is happening with far too many people in the ring at the moment.
Shawn Michaels, still of DX, is 23rd to blow the roof off the place. With EVERYONE else trying to get Viscera out, Shawn puts Finlay out. A superkick to Viscera allows everyone else to put him out. He puts Shelton out too. They actually imply that Holly could win as Masters is 24th. I’ve actually liked his face turn recently, and not just because I find him attractive. Nitro is out thanks to Benoit.
Oh yeah HHH is out with an injury again and wouldn’t be back until Summerslam. Chavo is 25th as this is somehow only his 3rd Rumble ever. Benoit puts Thorn out. I’ve spelled his name wrong both times I’ve mentioned him in here. MVP is 26th and he’s not quite a medium sized deal yet. He and Kennedy had been feuding with Kane and Taker. Masters is out. Every time Van Dam has been in the Rumble, he’s made the final 6. That’s not bad at all.
Carlito is 27th which is where 4 men have won from which is rather impressive. Shawn hangs on like someone that hangs on rather impressively. Khali is 28th and he’ll likely get rid of a bunch of people. Yep, there goes Benoit and Holly. He would win the world title in July once Edge got hurt…again. He chops the heck out of everyone and Miz is 29th. Good night did he ever come a LONG way since then. He has the same music too. Yeah he’s gone in 5 seconds.
Van Dam is out. Punk is the 5th in a row for him. Carlito is number 6. Chavo makes 7. They say that no one can beat Khali as Shawn beats on him to no avail. I think it’s about as obvious as possible who 30th is here, but it’s going to be awesome no matter what. Cole: “no one can stop Khali.” JBL: “we have our Wrestlemania main event.” Lawler: “if I were number 30 I’d have second thoughts. GONG! All three: “OH YES!” Taker power walks to the ring and it’s on.
Final group: Khali, Taker, Shawn, Orton, Edge, MVP.They slug it out and after a bad clothesline, Khali is out. Somehow Taker looks small next to him, and that’s just scary. Since Khali wiped everyone out, we have 5 people left: MVP, never mind he’s gone so the final four are Shawn, Taker, Edge and Orton. They really are getting good at this final four thing.
Orton pops Taker with a chair and Rated RKO double team him. Edge of course goes for the double cross and this somehow allows Shawn to take an RKO. Taker is bleeding. We get a mini handicap match with quite a few chair shots in there. Ok it’s more like two but whatever. They go for a conchairto but Shawn comes in for the save and the double elimination to set up the old school explosion.
Both guys are down though, and you know what’s coming. Taker sits up, and then Shawn nips up a few seconds later. Lawler says he isn’t sure if this has ever happened before. Oh I give up. We get my favorite Taker spot as he throws Shawn into the corner. The fans are way into this. This turns into of course a great one on one match. They fight on the apron with Taker showing off by barely hanging on much like Shawn would do.
They go back and forth with some great stuff as neither guy can keep the advantage. Shawn gets ahead for awhile but Chine Music is blocked to set up a chokeslam. Tombstone doesn’t work though and Taker gets kicked in the face. He goes for a second one, but Taker moves and puts Shawn out, to become the first guy from the 30th spot to win the thing.
That’s not great odds for the luckiest spot in the match. Taker poses for a LONG time to end the show, which is fine. The fans are uh, not thrilled with Taker putting out Shawn when he was that close to winning, and Shawn was in the main event of Mania anyway so it makes even less sense.
Rating: B. The ending makes this whole thing as they let the old guys go out there and prove that old school is better than the young guys. Having the two mini matches at the end was a nice little touch. There were far too many dead spots in there though which screwed things up.
The lineup ws good though and it was nice to see the ECW guys not really do much as they didn’t need to, other than Punk. This was fine though and the ending was great so that helps a lot. It could have been better, but I liked it.
Overall Rating: B. While nothing here is great, there’s only one bad match in the ECW Title match which at least is short. This kind of sums up the company as a whole around this time: not bad at all but nothing that jumps off the page that’s great. Taker would go on to win his second world title at Mania, ending the run there against Evolution by beating Batista.
When you think about it, you realize how freaking insane the Streak really is. Anyway, this was a pretty good show but not great. If you like the modern WWE you’ll like it and vice versa, so there you go.
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Monday was again a record setting day here as I hit a new high in page views. The original (and by that I mean the first time I started paying attention) record stood for 9 months. This one lasted 26 days. Thank you all for that.
Two more things:1. Just to brag a bit more, I was used as a source for the first time that I know of:
http://sports.yahoo.com/top/news;_ylt=AjiwGy42N9.xM6s6bYrE5_c5nYcB?slug=ycn-10871165
Click on the link about ECW’s first show.
2. Starting this coming Saturday, I won’t be reviewing as fast for the next two weeks. Odds are the Rumble review won’t be up in full but I’ll likely be watching the show and I’ll give my thoughts on it. Sorry for the delays but it’s out of my hands.
Thanks again,
KB
Is there any reason for this? My take:
If you’ve read my review of the show, the answer seems to be that Ryder is the guy that got over on his own and that’s not what the company wants. Unless this is a real injury, I don’t see any need for it. He got put in the horrible storyline with Eve who does nothing but complain to Cena and look good in shorts. Ryder has gone from the hottest thing in wrestling to a pawn in a Cena storyline to tide him over until Mania. Think about that for a minute.
Thoughts?
Monday Night Raw
Date: January 23, 2012
Location: US Airways Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
After last week’s actual emotion from Ace, I’m kind of curious as to what happens tonight. The Rumble is in six days and they’ve seemingly only built up to the actual match on Smackdown. That being said, it’s the Royal Rumble so it’s not like it needs much build. It’s a 30 man battle royal with an obvious prize to the winner. That’s not hard to sell. Let’s get to it.
We open things up with the champ. He sits down in the ring and talks about how this Sunday is the Rumble and a big WWE Title match is on the card. Ziggler claims that he’s beaten Punk three times this month, and that’s because he has. Now granted, all of those had Ace helping him but he has indeed beaten him three times. Punk calls Ace a failure, which he knows is true after looking it up on Wikipedia.
We get a clip from the end of the show last week. Punk is a little worried about Ace promising to screw him. However, what exactly can Ace do with two broken arms? Punk calls him out but when there’s no GM, Punk says he’s going after him. Cue….Cena? Cena looks ticked off. He says he was sick of hearing Punk ramble. He’s out here for business, not to talk. Cena demands Ace is here in a few moments to atone for his sins with Ryder last week. Also he wants a match tonight with Kane before his match at the Rumble. Cena also says Ace will resign. Now that’s something new.
Cena looks at the ramp and Punk says Ace needs to be here because of the people. Cue Ace who talks about having days where we wish we could change things. Last week wasn’t one of those days though. Punk calls Ace down to the ring and it’s the whole “I don’t work for you” line from Ace. Ryder is cleared to compete tonight and gets Kane tonight in a falls count anywhere match. If Cena gets involved, Ryder will never get a US Title rematch. Ace makes the tag team match against Ziggler/Swagger and it starts RIGHT NOW.
Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger vs. John Cena/CM Punk
The bad guys promise vengeance before the match. The bell is after a break. Ziggler vs. Cena gets us going. Punk is in long black shorts here which is a new look for him. Well technically as those are what he wore in ROH. Cena hits the running bulldog to start and here’s Punk. Ziggler bails to the floor as we take a break. Back with the starters and Ziggler speeding things up a bit and strutting.
Cena takes over and struts as well. Off to Swagger who takes it to the mat with a double chickenwing. Cena snaps off a suplex but Dolph makes the save with a dropkick. He drops a bunch of elbows and does the situps spot. Swagger Bomb gets two. Ace is texting or tweeting or whatever. Jack puts on a bearhug but Cena fires off an AA out of nowhere. Cena is so weakened though that he can only tag out.
Punk comes in with a springboard clothesline on Ziggy and he busts out his usual stuff. He sticks his tongue out like Jordan but the GTS is countered. High kick gets two as Swagger saves. Everything breaks down and Swagger gets the ankle lock on the floor but Cena reverses into the STF. Punk goes up but Ace distracts him. Punk threatens to him him and Ziggler rolls him up with a handful of tights for the pin at 11:10.
Rating: C+. Decent main event style tag match here with them playing up the idea of Ziggler getting the title via a screwjob. Cena and Swagger were just kind of there really but they kind of had a story to them so it made sense. Not a great match or anything but it was better than most of the recent main event tags.
Punk says this changes nothing because on Sunday, Ace will screw him and Punk will beat him up. Punk says since Ace likes giving Ziggler presents, he’ll give Ace a chance. For one night only, Ace should be a superstar. Tonight: Punk vs. Ace. He accepts and the fans cheer.
Jericho will be in the Highlight Reel next.
We get a clip from Jericho walking out last week.
Here’s Jericho for the Highlight Reel. He’s officially in the Rumble according to Lawler. Jericho picks up the mic and asks for silence. Nothing said yet. He puts the mic up to his mouth twice but he has an idea. He gets out of the ring and runs up to the stage, asking for one second. Jericho goes into the back and comes back with a t-shirt cannon and ammo. He doesn’t shoot any shirts but steals the camera which we get shots from.
Back to the mic again and once more he asks for silence. He points at the Jeritron 5000 and we get the Millennium Countdown and a highlight package of his career, including winning the Undisputed title. The fans cheer once it’s over but there are some boos in there too. HE SPEAKS! I’ve never heard a bigger pop for the word “This Sunday at the Royal Rumble”. He says that this Sunday, it’s going to be the end of the world as you know it. And that’s it. The lights go out, the jacket goes on, and we go to a break.
We get a WWE Rewind from September with the Hugh Jackman show.
We now get one of my favorite things of the year: the It’s All About The Numbers promo for the Rumble. I love these things.
31 Hall of Famers in Rumbles
21 Wrestlemania main events for those Hall of Famers
695 participants in total
39 eliminations for Shawn Michaels, the most everything
35 eliminations for Kane, the second most all time
194,107 pounds total, or 430 Big Shows
421,883 fans have seen the Rumbles
62:12 is the record amount of time in the Rumble, set by Mysterio
3 wins for Austin, the record
2 seconds, as in the record held by Warlord for over 20 years
1 second, Santino’s record breaking mark
2 women in the Rumble
#1 is the entrant that has produced the same amount of entrants as #30
27 is the lucky number, with four winners
55% have gone on to win their Mania match, dating back to 1993
Ryder is with Eve when Foley comes up. He says Kane is an animal, but he’s just a human being. And Foley is serious bro. Eve is worried and tries to call it off. Cena pops up to a mixed reaction. He says he’s got Ryder’s back if needed but Ryder says stay out of it so Ryder can get his rematch. He’s not mean about it though.
Zack Ryder vs. Kane
Falls count anywhere so Ryder isn’t so thrilled. He still has bad ribs/back too. Ryder goes right for him which is better than he’s done lately. Kane kicks him off the apron where Ryder’s face slams into the table. His back goes into the post and there’s a slam outside. Ryder goes back first into the steps and this has been domination. Eve is at ringside now and this isn’t going to end well. Back into the table again and we take a break.
Back and the beating continues on the floor. A whip into the barricade gets two. Here’s the smother and the referee asks what Ryder says. Well they’re not paid for their intelligence. Out into the crowd now and they go up by the tech area. Ryder hasn’t has any offense in about 8 minutes. Oh wait there’s a shot with a metal case. This is no DQ apparently. Back to the ramp now and Kane kicks him in the ribs.
Ryder goes head first into the WWE logo and a piece of it breaks off. That only gets two and Kane isn’t sure what to do here. A headbutt puts Ryder down as the fans chant for Zack. A few punches by Ryder don’t get him anywhere. And Ryder is chokeslammed through the stage. Ok then. The match just ends. Kane goes after Eve but Cena comes out and Kane runs into the crowd. Match ran roughly ten minutes.
Rating: D. You know I’m really getting ticked off at how they’re treating Ryder. He might as well have been Barry Horowitz out here with how much offense he got in. The guy comes up with a brand new character, makes WWE a bunch of money they wouldn’t have gotten in merchandize sales, and has now been treated like a rag doll by Kane multiple times, making him look like any other guy. I can’t stand this company at times.
Back from a break and Ryder is put on a stretcher. He’s put in an ambulance and Eve, that whiny little pest, says this is all Cena’s fault. Josh Matthews picks NOW to put a mic in Cena’s face. Cena slaps it out of his hands and is very ticked off.
Sheamus vs. Jinder Mahal
This is their 5th match and Sheamus has never lost. There was a tag match in there too. Barrett, as in the guy Sheamus should be feuding with with no Mahal involved, comes out for commentary. There are the ten forearms. Mahal hits a running knee to the face to take over with a cobra clutch. Well kind of. It’s closer to a Tazmission. Screw it: it’s a chinlock. Sheamus gets up and the Brogue Kick ends this at 3:10.
Rating: D. Sheamus is probably my current favorite wrestler but I have no interest in seeing him against Mahal ever again. I mean…we get it. Sheamus can destroy Mahal at will. It’s now just a challenge of how fast can he do it anymore. Why is Mahal even in this at all? Why isn’t it Sheamus vs. Barrett?
Anyway, Sheamus invites Barrett in but Barrett says no. Sheamus says he’ll win the Rumble.
Miz says that Truth will be repeating history because every partner he’s had has been destroyed. Truth comes up and says he’s a marketing analyst and declares Miz the #1 guy in being boring, uninteresting and making people ask What Else Is On. Truth also thinks his name is Fleischer. Ace comes up and breaks them up. The loser of the match is #1 in the Rumble.
Orton is back on Friday.
William Regal is on commentary for this next match due to his dancing on Friday.
Brodus Clay vs. Heath Slater
Brodus is in a white suit now. I’m assuming Regal will be his first feud. Slater gets run over to start. Heath gets the first notable offense in against Clay: a dropkick. And never mind as Slater is run over, suplexed and What The Funk ends this in 55 seconds.
Rumble Moment: Taker wins from #30.
R-Truth vs. The Miz
The loser is #1 in the Rumble on Sunday. Cole says that two men have gone from #1 to win the Rumble. I’d LOVE to hear someone ask who those people are. This is much more of a brawl than a match. They go to the floor quickly and then back inside. Miz drops him on the floor and we take a break. Back with Miz hitting something for two.
Off to an abdominal stretch which Truth escapes. He starts his comeback with a nice rolling victory roll for two. Backslide gets two but Miz hits the Reality Check for two. He loads up the Finale but Truth rolls through it. Little Jimmy is countered and a short DDT gets two. And out of nowhere a Little Jimmy gets the pin at 8:13. It’s as quick as it sounds.
Rating: D+. These two just don’t have good chemistry together. I remember them having a match I believe the Fatal Fourway PPV a few years back and it was simply dreadful. These are guys that are far better on the mic than in the ring, which becomes a problem after awhile. Not horrible but pretty much just there.
We get a medical update on Ryder: he has a broken back. Oh geez they’re writing him off aren’t they. If this isn’t for a legit injury, I don’t think I’ll have ever been more annoyed.
Ace is warming up. It’s 10:54 and he’s in his office. Otunga pops up with a fax and says it can’t wait. Ace isn’t happy with it, whatever it says.
It’s 10:59, so let’s run down the card for Sunday!
CM Punk vs. John Laruinaitis
And there’s no Ace. Oh wait here he is and we hear about his resume from All Japan, said by name. Otunga is here too. Ace says he got a fax from the board of directors. Otunga reads it and it says the board is concerned about his activities as interim GM of Raw. His status as interim GM is officially under review. Next week he’ll get a formal job evaluation to determine if he keeps his job or is terminated. HHH is giving the job evaulation.
Punk is very happy and says that means he won’t get screwed. Ace calls it a wakeup call and says this is all a misunderstanding. Foley is in the Rumble and he was always going to call the title match down the middle. Punk calls Ace a little girl that gets everything all year long but at Christmas she’s afraid of getting coal. He wants Ace to be fired. Ace says that won’t happen. No match of course.
Otunga will be subbing so he jumps him. There was no bell. Punk takes him down and Vices him. Ace backs away and Punk has a mouse under his eye. There’s a high kick to Otunga and Ace backs off again. He offers a handshake but walks into a GTS. Ziggler runs in and gives him the Zig Zag to end the show.
Overall Rating: D. This one really didn’t work at all and that’s because most of this was about taking out the new guy that got popular in a hurry on his own. I mean seriously, a broken back? If it’s as bad as it sounds, that’s probably what, back by April at the very best? Barring a legit injury, why in the world would you take away the second or third most popular guy on Raw? I hope there’s more to it than that, because if not then they’re idiots at a level even I didn’t expect. Bad show and I don’t think they realize the Rumble is Sunday.
Results
Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger b. CM Punk/John Cena – Rollup to Punk with a handful of tights
Kane vs. Zack Ryder went to a no contest when Kane chokeslammed Ryder through the stage
Sheamus b. Jinder Mahal – Brogue Kick
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater – What The Funk
R-Truth b. The Miz – Little Jimmy
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I love these things! Here are the numbers:
31 Hall of Famers in Rumbles
21 Wrestlemania main events for those Hall of Famers
695 participants in total
39 eliminations for Shawn Michaels, the most everything
35 eliminations for Kane, the second most all time
194,107 pounds total, or 430 Big Shows
421,883 fans have seen the Rumbles
62:12 is the record amount of time in the Rumble, set by Mysterio
3 wins for Austin, the record
2 seconds, as in the record held by Warlord for over 20 years
1 second, Santino’s record breaking mark
2 women in the Rumble
#1 is the entrant that has produced the same amount of entrants as #30
27 is the lucky number, with four winners
55% have gone on to win their Mania match, dating back to 1993
Smackdown
Date: July 20, 2000
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Long Island, New York
Attendance:
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
This is another request. It’s the go home show for the Fully Loaded 2000 PPV which has the Rock vs. Benoit for the title if I remember right. It also had the Flying Samoan as Rikishi jumped off the cage and crushed Venis but somehow lost the match. Other than that I have no idea what the request is for but let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of Raw where Benoit clocked Rock with a chair but Rock went into the locker room and drilled him with the same chair. They fought through the back with Rock destroying him for a good while. Rock Bottom onto the hood of a limo ended it.
Here’s Commissioner Foley to open things up. Mick talks about how he sucks up everywhere but this is his hometown. He says that on Monday, everything turned violent. That of course gets cheers. He enjoys being backstage but that isn’t his job. The thing he needs to deal with tonight is the Rock situation. Rock is going to go all insane on Sunday and likely get himself disqualified about two minutes in. Therefore, if Rock gets disqualified, he loses the title. The violence must come to an end.
Cue Jericho who has taped ribs and is ticked off. Jericho likes the idea of getting rid of the rest of the violence, but he wants just a little more. HHH hit him with the sledgehammer recently and it made him wacky. He feels like a hunter now and wants to join the “I just beat HHH within an inch of his life and left him almost dead” club, of which Foley is a member. There’s going to be a last man standing match on Sunday between them, but he wants to be in the club tonight.
Cue Benoit as this segment is getting long, especially when the ending is very clear from a few miles away. Oh and Shane is managing Benoit at this point. Benoit yells about Rock attacking him on Monday and Rock Bottoming him on the hood of a car. He says he’s awesome and makes fun of Jericho. Shane says Rock can’t beat Benoit and everyone knows it, including the people. He wants the PPV title match with the same stipulations tonight.
Cue HHH and Stephanie now to keep this going. In the distraction, Benoit puts Jericho in the Crossface. HHH runs down and Pedigrees him but here’s the champ. Rock runs off Benoit and clears the ring other than Foley. Foley makes the obvious tag main event for later. Somehow that took 18 minutes to get to. Teddy Long really is a model of efficiency.
European Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Dean Malenko vs. Perry Saturn
Eddie is defending and has Chyna with him here. Perry turned on Eddie on Monday, possibly due to Terri’s instructions. Eddie and Perry start fighting before Malenko gets here. Dean is Light Heavyweight Champion at this point and comes out with two women on his arms. Dean gets knocked to the floor and Chyna pops him in the face. Eddie is still in his t-shirt.
Eddie vs. Dean at the moment with Perry on the floor. Scratch that as he’s back in and it’s a two way now with Dean down. This is certainly in the usual triple threat formula already. They all fight at once for a nice change of pace but Saturn is knocked into Dean who Eddie rolls up for a fast pin to retain.
Rating: D+. It’s hard to complain when they only have about three and a half minutes to do anything here. The Radicalz were an interesting bunch because they could fight so many times but you could mix them up just enough so that things wouldn’t get too boring. The fast ending was a nice touch here too.
Post match, Perry clotheslines Chyna and hits his finisher, a modified Jackhammer. A top rope elbow is saved by Eddie, who takes it for Chyna.
We go to a pub where Edge and Christian are celebrating a win over the APA on Monday. They want to invite the Acolytes down to drink with them.
Just Joe comes in to visit the APA and can’t quite get it right.
Kurt Angle vs. Kane
This is a challenge by Kurt who gets Taker on Sunday. He wants to know why he’s been afraid of a man that rides a bicycle. Angle goes after him in the aisle which doesn’t go that well for him. Kane is still in the old school attire that he debuted in. Taker is watching in the back. Kane’s powerbomb is countered but a powerslam hits. He loads up the chokeslam but has to settle for a big boot instead. Kurt goes for the knee and Kane is in some trouble. Kane fights him off, so Kurt goes out and gets a chair which draws a DQ.
Rating: D. Too short to be anything but this was a pairing that didn’t usually work all that well. Their match at Mania a few years later never did anything for me either. That being said, this was more about Taker than anything else and that’s fine. It’s a perk you get when you have Kane around. Weak match though.
Angle destroys Kane’s knee/ankle post match.
A guy in the back asks HHH for his autograph and then asks for an autograph from Rock. HHH goes off on him. Well that happened.
Dick Butkus is going to coach an XFL team. That takes about five minutes to explain.
Hardcore Title: Steve Blackman vs. Al Snow
Steve is champion. Blackman kicks him down to start and goes to the floor to grab a trashcan lid. A fire extinguisher shot gets Snow out of trouble as well as a bucket full of sodas. Snow brings in more weapons and they do a sequence resulting in Snow’s head going between Blackman’s legs. A DDT onto a trashcan gets two for Snow. Snow loads up the bowling shirt but takes too long and gets beaten down.
Out to the floor and into the crowd now. Up by the stage and Blackman hits him in the head with a monitor. Crash Holly pops in and goes after Blackman. He takes Steve back to the ring where Blackman destroys him with nunchucks. Now Snow comes back but here’s Taz, Snow’s opponent on Sunday, to choke Snow out. Blackman pins the out cold Snow to retain.
Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill hardcore match. The run-ins were nicely done though so that adds a little to it. They did their thing though and it really wasn’t all that bad. These matches could do some entertaining stuff if you turned off your brain, which you almost had to here.
The same autograph seeker is still bothering HHH and says the Rock autograph is for his son. HHH says bring your son back here and he’ll see what he can do.
Hardy Boys/Rikishi vs. T&A/Val Venis
T&A&V? Make your own jokes. This is happening because there was something involving a ladder on Monday as Trish and Lita went up. Trish shoved Lita off and through a table so the redhead is gone for tonight. Val is IC Champion and is defending against the Fat Samoan on Sunday. Val and Jeff start us off. Off to Albert quickly and the Hardys start double teaming. T&A use their power and double team Matt down.
Off to Val who misses a dropkick to give Matt control. They’re moving very quickly out there. Val grabs a Blue Thunder Bomb for two. A powerbomb is countered into a Twist of Fate and it’s hot tag Rikishi who cleans house. He and Val fight up the aisle and the two tag teams have a small match of their own. Albert is knocked to the floor as Test hits the pumphandle slam on Matt. Jeff breaks up the cover with a Swanton though and Matt gets the pin.
Rating: C. I liked this as they were moving out there. This was a very fast paced match which is what you want in something like this. Combining two feuds into one like this is always a good thing as you can cover a lot of ground at once. The PPV matches were pretty good on top of that.
T&A destroys the Hardys post match until Lita comes out….and is promptly destroyed as well. Trish whips Lita’s bad back with a belt.
The autograph dude brings the kid to the back and HHH won’t give his kid one. Instead here’s the Fink who is going to ask about Rock’s autograph instead because Rock doesn’t like HHH.
Edge and Christian are still in the bar waiting for the APA.
The autograph seeker (he’s a production guy apparently) is with his son when Rock comes in to sign something for him. Rock signs but Benoit and Shane sneak in and put him in the Crossface. HHH stands over him because he’s an evil person.
Bull Buchanan vs. Godfather
It’s still the pimp version but he’d turn soon enough. Buchanan has just joined up with Richards it seems. Richards goes on a big rant about how you have to have rules or everything would be chaos. Godfather stands up for freedom and women before the match and now we’re finally ready to go after five minutes of chatting beforehand. They start off fast with Godfather hammering away on Buchanan in the corner. This is far more of a brawl than a match. The girls go after Richards and Stevie gets in, kicks Godfather and allows Bull to get the pin. Too short to rate but I think it did what it was supposed to do well enough.
Joe goes to talk to the APA again and Faarooq finally says let him say what he wants to say. He tells the guys about what Edge and Christian are saying. They throw Joe out and then decide to go get some beer, at a bar.
Big Bossman vs. Undertaker
Taker pounds Bossman into the corner to start and here comes Angle about 15 seconds into the match. Taker sees him and Angle runs. He comes back and has something in a bucket with the word caution on it. Kurt pours it over and it sizzles the bike. Hot wax maybe? Taker goes after him and it’s a countout.
In the back Taker goes after him but Angle jumps him with a wrench. Kane hobbles in for the save.
The APA get to the bar and the Canadians are gone. The other patrons try to fight them which fails. The APA walks out and chats for a bit before Edge and Christian jumps them from out of an alley and drive off.
Chris Benoit/HHH vs. The Rock/Chris Jericho
Rock and Jericho sprint in and here we go. The matches on Sunday pair off and it’s a war outside. Jericho and his bad ribs are dropped onto the table as the other pair is in the ring. Rock and Benoit officially start it off but the Game is in quickly. That’s a pairing that never gets old. Jericho is up on the apron and in now to pound HHH down. Trips gets in a shot to the ribs and the heels take over again.
Benoit comes back in and they work on the ribs even more by draping Jericho over the top rope. Back to HHH and the rib work continues. See how easy psychology is? Go for the injury that is right there in front of you! Jericho gets in a shot but the Lionsault eats knees. HHH takes him to the floor and slams him into various things which gets two back inside.
Jericho tries to get something going but walks into a facebuster. Now here’s a fine example of someone thinking in the ring. You’re all familiar with HHH’s facebuster where he grabs the guy’s head, jumps, and rams the opponent’s head into his own (as in HHH’s) knee. Well here HHH rams the knee INTO THE RIBS. Now THAT is a sign that someone is thinking out there. I love that. Rock finally has had enough and comes in to break up a Pedigree. Benoit takes a spinebuster but there goes the referee for the DQ.
Rating: B+. I really liked this. They had a lot of stuff going out there and the psychology was flowing and flowing hard, especially from the ring general that is HHH. He was absolutely on fire at this point and it was definitely his best period. Very fun stuff here and they even add in the ending to play up the main event on Sunday. THIS is how you book a frantic main event tag match and how it should go.
Shane comes in and gets knocked around. Rock Bottom to Benoit and there’s the Walls for HHH. Crossface to Benoit and the place is going manic. Both heels pass out to end the show.
Overall Rating: C+. It took awhile to get there, but sweet Christmas I was loving the last 15 minutes of this show. The main event angles here tonight were just nailing it and I want to watch Benoit vs. Rock now, and that was a great match in its own right. Very good ending here, but the rest of it was pretty ho-hum. I want to watch the PPV now though, and for a one off show that’s pretty good.
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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 27, 1995
Location: Macon Coliseum, Macon, Georgia
Attendance: 2,751
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Cornette
This is (as close as I can tell given how messed up and screwy WWE is at a simple thing like counting) the 100th episode of Raw. With the 1000th episode coming in July, I thought it might be fun to look at every 100th episode and see how things have changed. Now it’s very possible this isn’t exactly the 100th but it’s close enough. Let’s get to it.
The opening opens us up.
Tonight we’re going to hear from Lawrence Taylor himself.
The announcers chat for a bit and that siren is getting old quickly.
Lex Luger talks about the big showdown with Tatanka tonight. This started back at Summerslam where Lex was supposed to have sold out to DiBiase but it was his friend Tatanka that did it. Tatanka has jumped Lex a few times and beat up Chief Jay Strongbow as well, which of course means war.
Lex Luger vs. Tatanka
Well you can’t say they’re keeping us waiting. This is when DiBiase and his Million Dollar Team had stolen the Undertaker’s urn. Strongbow comes out with Luger. It’s a chase to start and Tatanka chops him in the corner. Lex hammers away and Tatanka hides on the floor. After a lengthy stall out there, Tatanka comes back in to hammer away. Luger no sells all of that and Tatanka goes outside again.
This time though Tatanka uses the tights of Luger to pull him through the ropes and into the barricade so Tatanka can take over. Strongbow with the full headdress is a bit distracting. A chop gets two as we take a break. Back with the racial stereotype still in control. Off to a bearhug by Tatanka which looks like some high impact cuddling. Lex, could you at least look awake?
He fights out of it and hits a suplex and this slow match somehow gets even slower. Tatanka chops away in the corner but Lex veeeeeeeeeeeery slooooooooooooooowly Huuuuuulks Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuup. And now he grabs a sleeper. Are you kidding me? That used to be Strongbow’s finisher apparently so Tatanka is mad at him for not teaching it to Tatanka. The headdress is destroyed and Strongbow chops him.
Lex goes after Tatanka and takes over as we take a break. Back with Luger running over Tatanka and knocking him to the floor. Tatanka tries to walk out but Lex makes the stop. Tatanka tries to walk out again but fails AGAIN. Dude just run! Lex rams him into the buckle a bunch of times but has to stop DiBiase. Tatanka walks again and this time escapes for the countout.
Rating: D. This was like a lawnmower that kept sputtering when you pulled on the rope. It was trying to start but it kept dying every time. The constant attempts to run away and then they finally got it to work. That was kind of a letdown but the match was nothing to see in the first place. That’s almost half of the show too.
We get a clip from a battle royal on Superstars where Lawler was put out but landed on one foot. He hopped around the ring until Bret stomped on the foot on the floor.
Owen Hart vs. Larry Santo
Owen is pretty freshly out of the main event here and is still in the upper midcard. Cornette tries to tell us that Larry Santo is the son of El Santo. Santo works over the arm and Owen is having some issues to start. Larry walks into a spinwheel kick though and Owen takes over. It turns into a squash with Owen doing various painful things to Santo. A missile dropkick sets up the Sharpshooter for the tap out.
Rating: D. Just a quick squash here. Owen would I think hook up with Yokozuna soon after this to win the tag titles. He had just finished a nearly year long feud with Bret which was pretty awesome and made a couple classics in the process. Santo was a guy from SMW so no wonder Cornette had jokes about him.
Lawrence Taylor says he wasn’t being disrespectful to Bam Bam Bigelow. The idea is that at the Rumble, Bigelow and Tatanka had lost in the finals of a tag team title tournament and Taylor laughed in his face. Bigelow shoved him and this is the big Mania angle and was the main event. Taylor says he’s tired of seeing the footage. He says he’s still weighing his options and might fight him at Mania. Cornette wants to talk to Bigelow and brings him into the interview. Thank goodness because this was going nowhere. They talk trash and I Dream of Jeannie is mentioned. They’re going to meet at a cafe. This was awful.
Doink the Clown vs. Bob Cook
Cornette goes on an anti-clown rant as Dink comes in to be annoying. Dink interferes and this is just bad. It’s “comedy” don’t you know? Off to the arm as Vince talks about weight loss or something. Doink hammers on him a bit and wins with the Whoopee Cushion (seated senton splash from the top). Total squash.
Video on how Davey was in the Rumble #2 but lost to Shawn in the amazing finish. Somehow WWE.com declared this the greatest moment ever in the Rumble. There was another battle royal on Sunday and Michaels eliminated himself. Bulldog won the battle royal and next week they’re having a match.
Kama Mustafa vs. Ken Raper
What an awful last name! Can you imagine all the jokes he had to get? Imagine, being named after the dead dad in The Lion King. Kama pounds him down and we’re in another squash. He’s the Supreme Fighting Machine which means a striking master. Belly to belly sets up a modified STF to end this. Nothing, again.
Davey says he isn’t worried about Shawn and/or Sid next week.
They talk about the press conference tomorrow to wrap up the show.
Overall Rating: D-. The feature match was boring, the big promo was boring, the feature mach didn’t end anything, and the squashes were boring as well. Nothing to see at all here but it was the 100th episode (we think). Unfortunately this was an absolutely HORRIBLE time for the company as no one cared about anything. Bad show but thankfully we won’t be back here for a long time.
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NWA Central States TV
Date: March 17, 1984
Location: Memorial Hall, Kansas City, Kansas
Commentators: Kevin Walters, Bill Morris
This is one of the NWA’s big territories from back in the day, but at this point it’s fallen on some hard times due to Vince’s nationwide plans. Harley Race was the big star but I think he’s moved into a management role by this point. I have no real idea what to expect here so I don’t have much else to say. Let’s get to it.
The show is called All Star Wrestling. Ok then. I’m sticking with Central States TV.
The announcers run down the card tonight. I only know a handful of these names.
Tommy Rogers vs. Scott Ferris
I’m assuming that’s the same Rogers from the Fantastics. He has a beard so it’s kind of hard to tell. Ferris is from Oregon and is the heel here. Very basic match here and the camera angle is taking some getting used to. It’s between the top and middle rope for the most part. Ferris is the bigger guy and the veteran here. He likes to drop knees it seems. Time for a bearhug because it’s the 80s. A belly to belly gets two. Scott works on the back but Rogers makes a very weak comeback. He walks into a hot shot though and a splash ends this with Ferris getting the very slow pin.
Rating: D. By today’s standards this was pretty boring and I don’t think it was all that great back then either. Ferris is a guy I’ve never really heard of but then again this is a territory so that has to be expected with a lot of them. This was really just a somewhat longer than usual squash, but Rogers would get a lot better.
Frank Leopard vs. One Man Gang
Gang is pretty new here and this is from a different area. Gordon Solie is on commentary. This is total dominance and for some reason we’re talking about Dusty Rhodes. I’d assume this is from Florida. It’s mentioned that Gang and Ron Bass are US Tag Champions so that puts this somewhere from late December of 83 to mid January of 84 in Florida. A splash ends this total squash.
Gorgeous Jimmy Garvin says he’s coming to St. Louis. He talks about an upcoming match with Chris Adams.
Tiger Mask vs. TG Stone
This is joined in progress. Stone gets knocked backwards and rolled up for two. Stone stomps away and is definitely the heel here. Tiger tries to use speed but Stone is an evil cheater who does bad things. Off to a chinlock and Stone pounds away. Most of this is just Stone pounding away on Tiger Mask. I’m assuming this is Tiger Mask I. That chinlockery continues, this time with a knee in the back.
A backdrop and a kneedrop combine to get one. Tiger Mask gets up and Hulks Up. Things get a little sloppy now as it seems like they go into a totally different match. Tiger gets up and things kind of stumble around into Stone taking him down. The masked one comes back and hits a backdrop and middle rope punch for two. A cross body gets two. Some punches and elbow drops get the same. A dropkick puts Stone down and it’s a time limit draw.
Rating: F. This was more about these two just not clicking at all. Tiger Mask is very good but he had nothing to work with here. Like I said, there’s only so much you can do in territories like these. You have guys like Stone who isn’t anything of note but he filled in a spot on a card. Bad chemistry abounded here.
Video on Bruce Reed, who is far more famous as Butch Reed. It’s a music video and all it really says is that Reed is awesome and strong. There are a LOT of shoulder blocks in this. This goes on WAY too long, as in like 5 minutes.
Chris Adams offers a rebuttal to Garvin. He’s British and from World Class where he had a long feud with Jimmy Garvin. They both had women involved. He also had two big contributions to American wrestling: he was the first big named guy to use a superkick, and he trained Steve Austin.
Wahoo McDaniel says he’s ready for his match with Harley Race for the Missouri Heavyweight Title, which was a big time title in those days.
Grapplers vs. Ted Oates
This is No DQ. The Grapplers are masked guys and Oates’ partner, Ron Richie, isn’t here yet so we’re starting with a handicap match. We’ll say that’s Grappler #1 to start. Oates fights them both off and the Grapplers regroup. We’ll say that’s #2 in there now. You really can’t tell them apart so there’s no point in trying to tell which is which. Oates hammers him down so it’s off to #1. The Grapplers run again as this has been one sided so far.
The Grapplers switch but the referee (the same one in all of the matches so far) catches him because of something about their boots. So the Grapplers tag and #1, the one that tried to cheat, comes in anyway. Oates nips up but finally gets in trouble due to the numbers advantage. The Grapplers start double teaming and here’s Bulldog Bob Brown to be Oates’ partner.
Brown tries to come in but gets shoved out for fear of a stern lecture I suppose. The Grapplers work over the leg with a spinning toe hold. Oates has finally seen Brown but #2 comes in and tries the same hold for awhile. Oates gets in a knee lift to #1 and makes the tag. Brown cleans house and wins very quickly with a belly to back suplex.
Rating: C-. Pretty basic tag match here once it got to the end. I’m not sure what the point of it was but I can’t hold that against it as I don’t know what the story was to it. Not a bad match or anything and the idea of having Oates desperately needing a tag worked well enough. Not bad and definitely the match of the show.
Brown and Oates take the Grappler down and try to find out if his boot is loaded. The other Grappler comes back and the boot goes upside Oates’ head to bust him open.
Post break Oates and Brown say they won.
Overall Rating: D. Like I said in the rating for the previous match, I’d have probably liked this a lot better if I had known some of the stories going into it. The stuff with the promos was good and I’d like of like to see some of those matches. The best way to describe this show is that the stuff that was good was good and the stuff that was bad was bad. Not the worst I’ve ever seen but it wasn’t anything great.
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WWF St. Louis
Date: January 1, 1984
Location: The Chase, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Gene Okerlund
Now as some of you may know, WWF would have a lot more house shows back in the day. What they would do is film these shows in their major cities and have commentary for them, then air them on local television. They did this in New York and MSG for years. They would also split these up and air them on syndicated shows. This is one from St. Louis. This is about three weeks before Hogan won the world title so it’s an era we don’t really see. Let’s get to it.
The Chase is a legendary wrestling venue in St. Louis but is actually a hotel. The NWA ran shows there for years and WWF came in at the very end to do a few months worth of shows.
Vince and Gene run down the card.
Dennis Stamp/Jerry Valiant vs. Rocky Johnson/Tony Atlas
Johnson/Atlas are tag champions but this is non-title. Stamp vs. Rocky starts us off. Rocky is called The Rock and it’s off to Atlas. Atlas hits some bad dropkicks and we’re in squash city here. Off to Valiant who is more of a brawler. Not that it does him any good as he gets knocked backwards quickly by right hands. A flying headscissors by Johnson takes Valiant down and it’s back to Tony.
Off to a test of strength because Valiant is stupid enough to try that with him. Now Atlas uses a headscissors. Symmetry people! Valiant takes him down into a chinlock as this match is getting more time than I expected it to. Back to Johnson who gets double teamed in the corner as well. And never mind as Atlas comes in, gorilla presses Stamp and splashes him for the pin.
Rating: C-. Just a long squash here but that’s what a lot of TV back then was supposed to be. Johnson and Atlas are a team that the more I see of them the more I like of them. Atlas especially as he’d be a great guy to have around today with his look and power. Decent match here and a good way to showcase the champs.
Ken Jugan vs. David Schultz
Schultz is most famous for attacking a journalist who asked if wrestling was fake. He’s known as Dr. D. Schultz grabs a headlock to begin and rides him on the mat. Jugan hasn’t gotten in a single shot yet. Schultz pulls him up after an elbow drop and keeps beating on him. Out to the floor as the beating continues. A backbreaker gets two. This is getting boring now as it’s been going on way too long. Back to the floor again as there’s nothing to talk about in this. Schultz hits various offense and Jugan gets nothing in at all. Jugan gets in some very weak punches and then gets tombstoned (called a southern piledriver) for the pin.
Rating: D-. Like I said, there’s only so much you can get out of a guy getting destroyed for this long. One thing that’s kind of different: the announcer reads the time and even says what the finishing move was. Ok he didn’t here but he did in the first place. This ran over seven minutes so you can see how it gets a bit uninteresting.
Bill Dixon vs. Hulk Hogan
Oh my goodness! Now THIS is an historic moment. This right here is Hulk Hogan’s first match back in the WWF after being gone for about four years and becoming a superstar in Rocky III. He comes out to Eye of the Tiger and is way over. Hulk would jump into the world title scene in about two weeks, winning the title in about three weeks and holding if for four years.
Actually, this is being reviewed on the anniversary of his title win so that’s appropriate. Hogan takes him to the mat with a Fujiwara Armbar ala Del Rio. Dixon hammers away but Hulk comes back with a big boot, slam and the big leg (I’m assuming making its WWF debut) ends this. Total squash but the crowd reaction tells you everything you need to know here. This is history people.
The local network president welcomes WWF to St. Louis. It lasted about two months.
Hulk says he loves St. Louis and that he’s focused on an upcoming battle royal. He wants a world title shot. Bear in mind he’s 1-0 (by his own admission) and he’s just declared himself #1 contender.
Murdoch and Adonis say they want the tag titles. They would get them in about 4 months.
Johnson and Atlas come in and say St. Louis is their home away from home.
Big John Studd says he’s awesome. He has a new manager named Magaw Maginaw. No idea who that is but he looks like Luscious Johnny V.
Jimmy Jackson vs. Big John Studd
In the words of Rocky III, “my prediction? PAIN.” Jackson tries to slam him and that goes nowhere. Studd offers him a top wristlock which goes just as well. Over the shoulder backbreaker ends this quick. Another squash.
Bill Berger vs. Ivan Putski
Putski is a Polish dude that is short but incredibly muscular. See, he’s really strong. That’s about it. And he’s Polish. This is just Putski using his strength to break almost everything and throw Berger around. Eventually the Polish Hammer (double axe to the chest) ends this.
Rating: D-. No idea what there is to say here. Putski is a pretty boring guy and this was no exception. His shoulders are huge but he has little chicken legs. Nothing really to see here and these squashes are certainly a generational thing. You couldn’t get away with this if your life depended on it.
Terry Daniels/Kevin Collins vs. Adrian Adonis/Dick Murdoch
This is probably the main event. Adonis vs. Daniels gets us going. Really I don’t know what to say here. After like 6 squashes there’s only so much you can say. Daniels is sent to the floor and thoroughly pummeled. Back in and he gets beaten up even more. Collins comes in and gets beaten up as this is really boring. Adonis puts Collins to sleep to end this.
Rating: D. See any other match already tonight to get the idea here.
Overall Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade. There were certainly a lot of big names on here and for a TV show that aired locally, there isn’t really a lot to complain about. For the masses, this wouldn’t have been much. Most of 1984 was pretty generic stuff, but once 85 got here things took off like a rocket. Not much here, but you have to keep some specifics in mind.
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