Smackdown – May 18, 2012: Nice Long Main Event Almost Saves It

Smackdown
Date: May 18, 2012
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

Time for another edition of that show on Fridays that doesn’t mean a thing because everything happens on Raw now. The main event tonight is Orton vs. Sheamus which is the big PPV match they’re waiting for the right time to have. This is the go home show for Over the Limit which is the least interesting PPV I can think of in years. Maybe we’ll actually have Punk and Bryan talk. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Raw. Gee there’s a novel idea. This is edited together really well as it’s Ace talking about what he can do and Cena reading a line from the letter to say that Ace can’t do that.

In the arena here’s Ace to really open things up. He disagrees with the Board’s decision because it puts him in harm’s way. Ace says that he’s almost 40 but he’s still in shape. Wow I would have put him closer to fifty. The Board won’t reconsider their decision so he appeals to the fans for their support. He asks for our prayers but gets Punk instead.

Punk says that everyone, including him and the rest of the roster has been praying. Their prayers have been answered by this match on Sunday. It’s not about if Cena beats him but rather when. It would be more realistic to say that it’s not if Big Show/Lesnar interferes but when but you get the idea. Punk says after Ace is fired the party will start on Raw and it’ll go on through Smackdown next week.

The champ talks about Raw where Ace made Big Show beg for forgiveness with a smile on his face. Ace constantly insults the intelligence of the fans and humiliates Teddy, so how does it feel to be on the other end of the stick? Ace says it’s not over yet so tonight Punk faces Kane. Punk says that concerns him but he’s going to face Kane like a man. Next week he’ll still be WWE Champion but Ace will be unemployed. So let’s see. Punk talked to a guy he’s not facing on Sunday, is facing a guy that is on the pre-show on Sunday, and didn’t mention his opponent by name at all. Nice way to show what the real match is guys.

Punk leaves but Ace stops to yell at the fans. He says that since he’s the GM, he’s been tough but fair. Ace says that he works hard for the fans and they still boo them. He’s not going to blame Punk and Cena, because it’s the fans’ fault. If this is his last night, he could care less about all of them, and with that he leaves.

Cena Make-A-Wish video which is good to mention because it makes you think of the good stuff WWE guys do. Make sure to remember that if you’re a Connecticut registered voter.

Kofi Kingston/R-Truth vs. Darren Young/Titus O’Neil

Young and Truth start things off. They fight into the corner and Truth punches him a bit. Off to Kofi with the springboard cross body for two. Kofi takes down both opponents but Titus’ distraction lets Young hit his belly to back suplex onto the apron to take over. Off to Titus who slams Kofi and hits a splash in the corner. Another attempt hits boots and it’s off to Young and Truth again. Truth speeds things up and hits the spinning forearm. DDT gets two as Titus saves. Kofi knocks O’Neil to the floor and hits a dive as the Little Jimmy pins Young at 2:59.

Just a quick aside here: we have Young and O’Neil brought up as a new team who look impressive, so in I think their fourth match they job clean to the champions in less than three minutes. That’s a great way to make these guys look good. This is where JOBBERS should be used. Throw Slater and someone else out there for this match and save Young/O’Neil for later. Unfortunately there are only five teams (Colons, champions, O’Neil/Young, Usos (are they still alive?) and Swagger/Ziggler) They’re saving the Colons for a big match I guess, so this is all they can use and that’s why there’s no division.

Don’t Be A Bully! How long before it’s time to STAND UP for WWE?

Ryder is filming stuff for his show in the back but Sandow is standing next to him. And that’s that apparently.

Video on Ryback. He’s 1/3 of the “they’re monsters but we have no idea what to do with him yet so we’ll keep having him squash people until the fans get bored of him” trio with Tensai and Clay.

Damien Sandow vs. Yoshi Tatsu

Sandow won’t fight for the same reasons he gave two weeks ago. He leaves but Tatsu calls him a chicken, complete with clucking. Sandow runs in and takes off the robe to reveal hot pink tights that Rick Martel would look twice at and destroys Tatsu. He hits a version of the Regal Cutter with both arms pulled instead of just one and then leaves. There was no bell and no pin so this wasn’t a match.

We recap the events that set up the fourway other than the actual announcement of the match.

Orton and Sheamus are in the back with Striker. Sheamus says he’s looking forward to fighting three guys and rubs in that he’s not champion anymore. Orton says he’s no longer so overconfident that he overlooks his opponents. He can beat anyone on Sunday but wants to beat Sheamus. Sheamus says he can kick Orton right now but Orton says compared to him, Sheamus is too nice a guy.

Zack Ryder vs. Daniel Bryan

Ryder gets in some offense to start but a running knee puts him down. The running dropkick in the corner gets two. Bryan works on the arm a bit but gets caught by the knees in the corner. Broski Boot misses and Bryan kicks him in the head. YES Lock gets the submission at 2:28. Squash.

Kane vs. CM Punk

Bryan is sitting in on commentary, which is going to multiply the build for this match by about 10,000%. Kane knocks him down to start so Punk fires some kicks to the legs. A clothesline puts Kane on the floor and we take a break. Back with Punk kicking the knee some more and hitting a DDT for two. Punk hooks a Figure Four AND IT’S ON THE PROPER LEG!!! Kane breaks it quickly but I’m in too much shock to care.

Punk springboards into the uppercut and takes over with some very slow kicks. A baseball slide sends Punk’s ribs into the post and Kane focuses on them for a bit. Off to a bearhug and then a backbreaker for two. There’s a body vice as Bryan talks about the history with Punk and how their paths reached this point. See how easy it is? Back up and Punk escapes the chokeslam and hits a swinging neckbreaker for two.

Punk hits the knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered as you would expect it to be. Since that didn’t work he goes to the middle rope for the bulldog which gets two. He tries the GTS but the ribs give out. Big boot gets two for Kane. Bryan sounds like a kid at Christmas with the ribs being hurt.

Kane loads up a superplex but Punk shoves him off and hits the Macho Elbow for two. He tries the Vice but Kane blocks it. Top rope clothesline puts Punk down and it’s chokeslam time. Punk hits the High Kick to counter and Kane goes to the floor. Suicide dive takes Kane out but Bryan pops up with a chair. He hits Kane which gives Kane the DQ win at 9:50 shown of 13:20.

Rating: C-. Not a great match but the main thing that hurt it was the slow pace of it. They were going by the numbers here but the ending helped it a bit. If a rib injury for Bryan to focus on is the best angle we can get to set up the match then we’ll have to go with it. I mean, WWE isn’t going to bother letting them cut promos on each other or anything so I’ll take what I can get.

Bryan runs and sees Punk with the chair near him, so he destroys Punk with it. Bryan hit Kane in the back if that clears anything up. A chokeslam in the ring leaves Punk laying.

Santino Marella vs. Cody Rhodes

This is the result of an epic Twitter War this week over which title means more. If you don’t know who’s losing here, I can’t help you. Booker says the IC Title is a little more prestigious. Cody hits some knees to the ribs to take over but the moonsault press misses. Here’s the Cobra but Cody dropkicks him down for two. And never mind as the Cobra hits for the pin at 1:59. Hey Vince, congratulations on crushing a guy that could be a big star for you because his brother got fired. Seriously, why else could this be happening?

Since having a match go longer than two minutes is impossible, here’s Ace’s promo from earlier tonight to fill in time.

Now we spend TEN FULL MINUTES reairing the ENTIRE Big Show firing segment from Monday.

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

There’s a TON of time left for this because nothing else has happened on this show. Feeling out process to start with Orton getting caught in a headlock. Randy speeds things up and hits a dropkick to take over. They go into the corner and it turns into a shoving match followed by a fight. A clothesline puts the champion down and Orton does his stomping, focusing on the ankle for a bit.

A knee drop misses and Sheamus comes back with right hands in the corner. Orton punches back but Sheamus’ are better and he takes over. Randy comes back with a clothesline to send Sheamus to the floor but he sends Orton into the steps. Brogue Kick misses and Orton rams Sheamus’ shoulder into the post. No one has had a distinct advantage at all so far. That’s Sheamus’ bad shoulder so there’s some psychology thrown in there.

Orton stomps on the arm to drive it into the steps as we take a break. Back with Orton bending the arm around the ropes. Some elbows to the arm keep Sheamus down as does a DDT on the arm. Off to a chinlock with an arm trap. Sheamus starts a comeback but gets sent into the corner shoulder first. The champ manages to send him to the floor and hits a high knee followed by the ten forearms in the ropes.

Sheamus knocks Orton off the apron and into the barricade as we take another break. Back with Sheamus dropping knees on Orton which eventually get two. Regal Roll puts Orton down and Sheamus loads up the High Cross. Orton counters that too, this time into the backbreaker. Sheamus charges at him but Orton hooks a belly to belly of all things. He tries the elevated DDT but Sheamus guillotines him on the top to escape.

Slingshot shoulder puts Orton down and there are the running ax handles. Powerslam gets two. Another Irish Curse attempt is broken up but another attempt connects for two. Sheamus goes up but Orton stops him with punches followed by a top rope superplex. That only gets two and they slug it out. Brogue Kick misses and Sheamus gets caught in the rope and the elevated DDT. Orton loads up the RKO but Sheamus ducks. Brogue Kick misses and Orton tries the RKO again, but Sheamus drops down into a rollup for the pin at 16:35 shown of 23:35.

Rating: B. I was really getting into this at the end and the finishing sequence was very nicely done. They were setting up this as the match with both guys hitting everything they could other than their big move and then they threw a nicely timed curve ball with Sheamus winning with a rollup. The ending is also good as neither guy looks weak here at all and it keeps the main event on Sunday wide open.

Post match they shake hands and Orton RKOs him. That’s a pretty heelish move.

Overall Rating: D+. Until the good main event, this was on pace to be one of the worst Smackdowns that I can remember in years. The last quarter of it being good prevented that, but there are still major holes in this show. First of all, where were Jericho and Del Rio? They’re in this show’s main event and they’re not even on the broadcast for a promo? Second, Punk and Bryan is the most thrown out there main event in a LONG time. Even Bryan vs. Sheamus had a better build than this. Disappointing show, but a good main event helps it a lot.

Results
Kofi Kingston/R-Truth b. Titus O’Neil/Darren Young – Little Jimmy to Young
Daniel Bryan b. Zack Ryder – YES Lock
Kane b. CM Punk via DQ when Daniel Bryan interfered
Santino Marella b. Cody Rhodes – Cobra
Sheamus b. Randy Orton – Rollup

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