Smackdown – September 14, 2012: Daniel Bryan Is Too Funny

Smackdown
Date: September 14, 2012
Location: Scotiabank Place, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

We’re at the final show before Night fo Champions and here on Smackdown, there isn’t much to get excited about. Sheamus vs. Del Rio is happening again and I don’t think many people were interested in it at first, let alone a second match. Now that we’re at the third match, it’s beyond scraping the bottom of the barrel. Other than that we still need an IC Title opponent for Miz. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video on how barbaric the Brogue Kick is, followed by clips from the deposition on Monday. Some of the Jewish humor is left out here. Also, Sheamus kicked Otunga’s head off on Monday.

Otunga, Ricardo and Del Rio are in the ring with the first two wearing neck braces. Del Rio is glad the Brogue Kick has been banned and Ricardo thanks his mom and cries. Otunga says that he’s an officer of the court while Sheamus is a hooligan, but he’ll recover from the kick on Monday. Del Rio says we have someone else who is a victim of the kick and we get a clip from last year with Christian getting kicked at Night of Champions.

Christian pops up on screen with his arm in a sling. Allegedly he just had shoulder surgery which I haven’t heard of before this. Otunga talks about how Christian was a victim but Christian cuts him off. Christian doesn’t like Del Rio or Otunga and he isn’t doing this for himself or Del Rio, but for the boys in the back. He was a two time world champion last year and the Brogue Kick derailed him. The Brogue Kick should stay banned according to Christian.

This brings out Daniel Bryan who is still having issues with not getting angry at the fans. Bryan is here to thank Del Rio but the fans chant goat face at him. That sets him off and he says he looks like this because Sheamus has kicked him in the face so many times. Booker has granted him a Wrestlemania rematch tonight so that Bryan can right the wrongs of that night.

Bryan goes on another rant against the fans when the champ comes out. Somehow he ties this into finding out that his aunt was actually his uncle and says that it wasn’t the Brogue Kick that beat Bryan but rather Sheamus himself. Sheamus gets on the apron and guillotines Otunga on the top rope, pulling off the neck brace in the process.

Sin Cara vs. The Miz

Non-title here. Cara just slides into the ring now instead of any kind of dive at all. The lights are all colored again. Miz suplexes him down but Cara sends him to the floor a few seconds later. Cara tries to charge at him but runs into a forearm to take him down as we take a break. Back with Miz holding a chinlock as the fans give what sounds like a golf clap to Cara. Miz pounds away on the mat and in the corner, followed by the corner clothesline and the double ax off the top for two.

Back to the chinlock but the following corner clothesline misses. Cara starts firing off some kicks and the fans do not react at all. Miz misses a big boot and Cara headscissors Miz down. An enziguri from the apron takes Miz down but Cara takes too long and gets caught in the Finale, only to reverse into a Magistral (I know I misspelled that) cradle for the pin on Miz at 4:44 shown of 8:24.

Rating: C. They really needed a break in an eight and a half minute match? Anyway this likely sets up a multi-man match for the PPV as Rey and Cara have both beaten Miz and Cody attacked the champ on Monday as well. There’s nothing wrong with combining a few feuds like that and getting those three involved in a title match, assuming that’s the way they go with it.

Miz talks to Striker in the back with Striker wondering how Miz likes facing an unknown opponent. Cody comes up and Miz wants to know why he was jumped on Monday. Cody says he wants his Intercontinental Title back. Mysterio pops up and says he deserves a shot at the title too. Sin Cara comes up too and points at the belt. Teddy Long pops up and makes the fourway.

We recap the Anger Management stuff leading up to Bryan/Kane becoming number one contenders to the tag titles. Part of this is set to a song that sounds like it’s called Smiley Face World.

We go to Kane in the back, holding a small red ball. The Doctor is with them when Bryan comes in. Bryan yells at Kane for attacking him on Monday and they say they both want to be tag champions. The Doctor says they both have balls (they do) and various jokes are made. Kane: “Mine’s bigger than yours.” Bryan isn’t sure.

Kane vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi fires off kicks to start and dropkicks Kane into the ropes, only to get his head taken off by an uppercut. The low dropkick gets two for Kane but his powerslam is countered into a DDT. Trouble in Paradise is caught in a chokeslam but Kofi escapes and goes to the top, only to jump into the chokeslam for the pin at 2:10.

Kane goes to chokeslam him again but Dr. Shelby comes out and Kane hugs Kofi instead.

Orton isn’t worried about facing Tensai tonight or facing Ziggler on Sunday.

Randy Orton vs. Tensai

Orton takes Tensai down quickly and drops a few knees. Tensai comes back with an uppercut and we’re in a slug out. Orton punches away in the corner but gets run over by a shoulder block. There isn’t much variety in the offense so far in this one. Orton is knocked to the floor but he gets in behind Tensai and puts him in the same position that Sheamus uses for the ten forearms. Instead though, Orton hits some uppercuts to the back and a dropkick to send Tensai to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Tensai splashing Orton in the corner. Cole seems way too excited about the size of Tensai here. Off to a nerve hold but Orton fights up pretty quickly with a headbutt. The powerslam puts Tensai down as does the Elevated DDT. Orton does his stomp but the RKO is countered into the Baldo Bomb. The backsplash misses though and the RKO gets the pin at 5:13 shown of 8:43.

Rating: D+. This didn’t do it for me for the most part. It wasn’t a terrible match but it felt like one of those old 1980s punch and kick matches. Tensai is better in the role of the midcard jobber and I can’t picture him lasting much longer. The guy just isn’t interesting at all and wins over him don’t mean much. This wasn’t much of a win for Orton before the PPV though.

Vickie comes out and says that after Sunday, Orton won’t be a world champion again. In a good bit, Orton says that Vickie standing there can only mean one thing. Orton spins around into the RKO position and Ziggler stops right before he tries to charge in from behind.

Here are Cesaro and Aksana to explain (in five languages) the outrage Cesaro feels over defending the title against the winner of a battle royal. Tyson Kidd comes out and speaks Canadian, saying that after Sunday, Cesaro will be a former US Champion, eh. Cesaro dispatches him so here’s serious Brodus but Cesaro doesn’t seem interested in fighting him. Kidd dropkicks Cesaro into a headbutt from Clay and there’s a splash for the champ. I have no idea who is winning the battle royal on Sunday but as long as it’s not Santino I’m fine.

Wade Barrett comes out and explains what it means when he says he’s open for business. Next week someone gets to sample the product and then business will be booming. Ok then.

Kaitlyn vs. Beth Phoenix

The announcers talk about how Kaitlyn could match strength with Beth. Cole says that Kaitlyn could do that with a little more experience. What does experience have to do with how strong you are? Anyway a sunset flip gets two for Kaitlyn as does a rollup. Layla is watching in the back. Beth slams Kaitlyn face first into the mat and chokes away a bit more. The Glam Slam is countered into a reverse DDT for the pin by Kaitlyn at 2:51. Yep, Beth just lost clean to Kaitlyn in under three minutes.

We get a graphic saying Get Well Jerry. This is the first mention of Lawler tonight. I’m watching the international version and I’ve heard they edited out all of the mentions of Lawler on commentary on the Raw international versions, so maybe that’s what’s going on here.

Raw ReBound airs the entire ending segment with Cena/Punk/Hart. That was pretty good stuff.

Let’s run down the PPV card.

Eve is watching in the back and talks to Booker who looks like he’s on the crack high to end all crack highs. Eve sucks up to him a bit and Teddy does the same. Booker leaves with Eve but there wasn’t any animosity with Teddy.

Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

Non-title again. Sheamus powers him down to start as Del Rio, Otunga and Ricardo are watching in the back. Bryan has to stop to center himself for a bit and Sheamus stands there and lets him. Bryan tries a leapfrog but gets caught in the Regal Roll (fireman’s carry slam) for two. A clothesline puts Bryan on the floor but Bryan trips Sheamus onto the apron as the champ comes to the floor.

A running dropkick keeps Sheamus down and they head back into the ring. Bryan goes after the arm and snaps it across his shoulder. A charge in the corner misses and there’s the top rope shoulder from Sheamus. I’ve always like that move. A running knee sets up a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker which Cole calls the Irish Curse for no apparent reason. Bryan blocks the Cloverleaf as the fans chant Goat Face. Sheamus ties Bryan up in the ropes for the forearms (Bryan: NOOOOOO! Sheamus: YEEEEESSSSSS!) which get two.

Bryan avoids a charge in the corner and hits the kick to the head for two. Bryan throws on his guillotine choke which doesn’t last long. The NO Lock doesn’t work and there’s the real Irish Curse. The Cloverleaf goes on and the submission master is in trouble. After a lot of shouting NO, Bryan shouts YES and gives up at 9:06. No break in the main event? That’s a rare thing anymore.

Rating: C+. Not a great match but this one wasn’t in nearly as much doubt as their PPV matches were back in the day. Come to think of it, I don’t think Bryan has ever gotten a pin or a submission on Sheamus. This worked fine for a TV main event though and Sheamus gets to show off the Cloverleaf again. It almost seems like they’re making the ending of the PPV match too obvious, but maybe that’s the point.

Overall Rating: C+. This was fine for a show before the PPV, although I wouldn’t have minded seeing Ryback or Sandow out there. I’m hoping Ryback wins the battle royal on Sunday and wins the title so that he has something to do. I know I’m in the minority but I’d love to see him get hot shotted to the world title. The guy is getting the reactions and he’s been untouchable so far so why not? It would bring some fresh blood to the show if nothing else. Anyway, not a bad show but there was really nothing to see here. When you have the PPV set for the most part already, there’s nothing wrong with that.

Results

Sin Cara b. The Miz – Magistral Cradle

Kane b. Kofi Kingston – Chokeslam

Tensai b. Randy Orton – RKO

Kaitlyn b. Beth Phoenix – Reverse DDT

Sheamus b. Daniel Bryan – Cloverleaf

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