Monday Night Raw
Date: February 22, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Rob Bartlett, Randy Savage

This is going WAY back into the day, as in the show isn’t even two months old yet. This would be the seventh episode of the series and we’re coming up on Wrestlemania IX. The main story tonight though is that for the first time ever on Raw, Hulk Hogan will be live in the ring for one of the only times ever in the early days. It’s also Hogan’s first on screen appearance since around Wrestlemania of the previous year. Let’s get to it.

Rob Bartlett, a comedian who was on Raw in the early days (and has since admitted that he had no business there and knew he was terrible) says we’re live from New York for Monday Night Raw.

The announcers talk about the upcoming show for a bit and they do the “It’s uncut, uncooked and uncensored.” Again, why is it called Raw?

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Scott Taylor

In a few years Taylor would change his last name to 2 Hotty. Bartlett: “Who is Bigelow fighting? Some guy they got off the street?” Taylor gets in a few shots to start but a BIG clothesline takes him right back down. An electric chair puts Bigelow down again as Savage has now started calling Hogan divine. He was a monster earlier and now he’s heavenly. A butterfly backbreaker sets up a pair of top rope headbutts to end the squash. Bigelow wins in case you’re some kind of schnook.

We get a pre recorded interview with Hogan where he says that the future for Hulkamania is really bright. Before he gets to that though, he talks about the past of Hulkamania where he is indeed a human being that has made mistakes. I think this is an admission of his steroid use but he never says those exact words. Granted he admitted it in the trial but that hadn’t happened yet.

Now Hogan talks about “tabloid terrorism” and goes onto a mini rant about how bad it is when someone says something and doesn’t back it up. I’m legitimately laughing out loud that HULK HOGAN is complaining about someone making false statements. Hogan issues a fifth demandment: Train, say your prayers, take your vitamins, believe in yourself and now, BELIEVE IN HULK HOGAN!

Nasty Boys/Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels/Beverly Brothers

Shawn is IC Champion and feuding with Tatanka or about to be feuding with him. Apparently it’s the former. For clarity, the Beverlys are Beau and Blake and the Nastys are Jerry Sags and Brian Knobbs. It’s a big brawl to start until we get down to Sags vs. we’ll say Blake Beverly. It’s off to Knobbs and there’s a double Beverly Pit Stop (don’t ask). Tatanka vs. Shawn is official for Mania. Blake finally gets a boot up in the corner and it’s off to Shawn. The champ hits a jumping back elbow to take Knobbs down and the Brothers get in some cheating.

Knobbs escapes long enough to tag in Tatanka so Shawn goes running over to Beau for a tag. Tatanka hooks an armbar on Beau before it’s back to Sags for the same move. A shoulder breaker puts Beau down and it’s back to Tatanka for more cranking on the arm. Everything breaks down again and Beau keeps getting beaten up. Back to Brian for more beating in the corner and we take a break.

Back with Knobbs stomping away on Beau even more. Blake finally does something by low bridging Brian to give his brother control. Off to Blake legally now as Savage is talking about Boyz 2 Men. Shawn comes in but is only a decoy to allow the Brothers to do the Haas/Benjamin spot of one jumping over the other’s back to land on Brian’s back as he’s draped over the ropes. Off to Blake for a bearhug which goes nowhere so it’s off to Beau for some generic stomping.

Thankfully Shawn comes in to stop another tag or the match might have actually gotten interesting. That was a close call. Brian and Michaels clothesline each other and we get a tag off to Tatanka. A bit of house is cleaned and Tatanka gets two off a top rope chop. The Papoose To Go puts Shawn out but everything breaks down. We get down to Shawn vs. Tatanka and Shawn loads up the Teardrop Suplex but Tatanka reverses into a sunset flip for the upset pin.

Rating: D+. This match just kept going. I’m not sure if the Nastys and Beverlys were feuding at this point but they didn’t fight at Wrestlemania. Then again I’m surprised the Beverlys still had jobs at this point so it’s not a surprise that they’re filling in a spot in a six man tag here. WAY too long of a match here though and it wasn’t good enough to validate this amount of time.

Wrestlemania IX is coming to Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas.

Speaking of people who shouldn’t have a job at this point, Sean Mooney is with the fans who are excited about Hogan being back.

BUY VARIOUS WWF MERCHANDISE!!!

Crush vs. Terry Taylor

It’s another squash as Crush gets to throw Taylor around for a bit. The interesting note during this match: Vince talks about Bill Clinton appointing Hulk to head up his physical fitness council. That’s all well and good, but we get a phone call from “Arnold Schwarzenegger” (Bartlett doing a decent impression), ranting about how he wants that position. Taylor hooks a chinlock and a jawbreaker before Crush throws him off. A few power moves set up the Headvice on Taylor for the submission.

Rating: D. Seriously, WHAT IS UP WITH THIS BARTLETT GUY??? I get that he’s a comedian, but that begs the question: if you want comedy, why is Bobby Heenan not doing this role? He’s a funny guy and actually knows what he’s talking about in wrestling. Bartlett is certainly trying but he’s just not in the right role here.

We recap Money Inc. smashing Beefcake’s already hurt face with a metal briefcase. This turned Jimmy Hart face and has brought Hogan back to avenge his friend.

Here’s Hogan for the first time on Monday Night Raw. He says he has a lot of stuff to talk about but first of all, it’s about Brutus Beefcake and his face injury. Hogan thanks God and Jimmy Hart for helping Brutus through this as apparently that’s enough to forgive Jimmy for about ten years of tormenting him. Hulk calls out Brutus, who looks pretty good for having his face crushed just a week or two ago.

Beefcake talks about how he was hurt last week but thankfully his face is now made of titanium so it didn’t do much damage. Well it broke his nose but that’s an acceptable loss. They bring out Jimmy Hart as their new manager and wouldn’t you know it: Jimmy has always wanted to manage Hulk. So is it like when you’re seven and you pick on the girls you like? Oh and they’re called the Mega Maniacs. Jimmy’s first assignment: get them matches with Money Inc., either singles or tag matches. This was another long segment with some stupid parts to it.

Wrestlemania is still happening at Caesar’s Palace. Nothing has changed in the last 20 minutes.

Hogan and Beefcake are still posing after the break.

Undertaker vs. Skinner

After the entrances we take a break with like two minutes left. Skinner clotheslines him to the floor but we have a G.I. Joe commercial to get through. Skinner pounds away on Undertaker and knocks him to the floor where Taker gets choked. Vince tells us that next week Bret is defending the world title against “one of the Headshrinkers.” Yeah they don’t even have an opponent yet. The show ends with the match still in progress.

Overall Rating: D. I know the shows were bad back in the day, but this was REALLY bad. Hogan and Beefcake teaming up with Hart was the focus of this show but it never clicked at all. Even when I was a kid (five at this point) I didn’t buy Jimmy Hart as Hogan’s friend. They were enemies and it didn’t work that all of a sudden they got along. Other than that the show was dull and didn’t have any good matches in sight. We’ll get back to 1993 eventually.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Nitro #108
Date: October 6, 1997
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 14,357
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

We’re about three weeks away from Halloween Havoc and the card is starting to take shape. We’re also less than three months away from Starrcade and the biggest match in company history. As for tonight, the main event is Benoit vs. Hennig, presumably for the US Title. Tonight is likely going to be all about building for the PPV, which could stand a bit more work at this point. Let’s get to it.

After the usual banter from the announcers, here’s the NWO A-Team with something to say. Bischoff plugs Hogan’s latest TV movie, Assault on Devil’s Island, which debuts later this month. Hogan challenges Sting for later tonight, but he knows Sting won’t be here because Hogan is here and that no good dirty Sting is a coward. Apparently CNN is going to become the Hogan News Network as Hogan and the NWO are going to take over all of the Turner organization. They’ll be waiting for Piper later tonight and that’s about it.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Booker T

Debra and Jackie are in the respective corners. Things go fast to start with Jeff getting the first offensive move in the form of a hiptoss. Booker comes back with a fast kick to send Jarrett out to the floor. The advantage doesn’t last long though as Jeff suckers him in and pounds away a bit to take over. The fans think Jarrett sucks as he elbows Booker down. Booker spins right back up though and hits the side kick to take Jarrett down. The crowd is hot tonight.

We take a break and come back with Jarrett getting two off a top rope cross body. A clothesline puts Booker down as does a great looking dropkick. Jarrett is in full control but Booker comes back with a forearm to the face. Booker hits a spinwheel kick and a slam to put Jarrett in trouble. The ax kick gets two but the hook of the leg puts Jarrett’s foot on the rope. A clothesline puts Jarrett on the floor and here’s Mongo to yell. Debra slaps him so A Mongo chokes Jeff before sending him back inside. Booker grabs a rollup for the surprise pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it didn’t mean anything as Jarrett wouldn’t wrestle again in WCW for years. Thankfully he went over to the WWF and got to bore people on Raw. Booker was still a few months away from his singles push but once it started it kept going and going until WCW went under.

The announcers talk about Hogan vs. Piper at Havoc and say that it’ll change wrestling forever. I’m sure it will.

Billy Kidman vs. Alex Wright

Kidman is still a rookie here and looks very nervous. Billy shoves him into the corner to start and gives a clean break. Alex does the same and slaps Kidman in the face. Nice bit of a story there. Wright sends him to the floor and takes the opportunity to dance. Raven is in the front row and has Perry Saturn with him. Back in and Kidman hits a pair of dropkicks to send Wright out to the floor.

Oh wait we need to cut to the back to see Mongo and Debra arguing. Jeff Jarrett comes up and gets yelled at as well. Mongo says he has an idea and we go back to the match. Wright hits a top rope stomp and dances a bit more. A running corner clothesline hits Kidman and a bridging suplex gets two.

The fans look at presumably a fight off camera as Wright hits a clothesline for no cover. Kidman counters the German suplex into a jawbreaker and hits a middle rope dropkick to send Wright into the corner. A bulldog out of the corner gets two for Billy but he stops to look at Raven. The 450 misses Wright and after some dancing, a German suplex ends Kidman.

Rating: C. Decent match here which apparently was a rematch from Saturday Night where Billy beat Alex. The constant cutting away here got annoying but it actually led to something in this case. Wright continues to be someone that seems like he’s on the verge of a push but would be in the same place for months.

Ernest Miller vs. Mortis

Now here’s a fresh match. Miller takes over with a quick snapmare and a kick to the face for two. Ernest expands his moveset even further by going up top, only to get crotched by James Vanderberg. A top rope Fameasser gets two for the guy in a mask (Mortis) and he even uses the rope for good measure. It’s time for kicks because what would these two be without a lot of kicks?

Mortis keeps being EVIL by throwing Miller over the top rope while the referee is distracted. How EVIL can he get? Apparently Jackie is getting a TV Title shot at Halloween Havoc. A kind of Russian legsweep gets two for the EVIL one before he breaks up a sunset flip with a right hand. Miller rolls away from a top rope splash though and hits two kicks (I’m as shocked as you are), one being from the top, for the pin.

Rating: D. It would take Miller basically going crazy before he got interesting which makes these earlier matches pretty hard to sit through. The guy just wasn’t interesting as you can only take “karate guy” so far as a gimmick. Mortis continues to impress with that wide variety of offense he has. Oh and he’s EVIL so that helps.

Savage says he’ll beat Page at the PPV.

Scott Hall vs. Hector Garza

This is a rematch from two weeks ago when Garza won in a shocking upset. Hall has taped up ribs for reasons that I don’t remember. My guess would be alcohol related. Wait wasn’t he on crutches last week too? I think something is afoot. Oh and hour #2 starts. Hall does the survey and Hall says Nash has a bad knee so he’s not here tonight. Apparently they were watching Larry Zbyszko matches and laughed so hard that Nash fell over and hurt his knee. Points for a funny line if nothing else.

We take a break and come back for the bell. After said bell Hall decks Garza in the head and I think I know where this is going. There’s the fallaway slam but the ribs are hurting a bit. Hall shoves a referee into the corner to allow Syxx to hit a Bronco Buster on Garza. The Outsider’s Edge ends this quick as Hall shoves the referee down for a cover.

Post match Hall puts the referee in the Torture Rack and spray paints a Z on his back.

We get a look at Goldberg’s two wins over the last two weeks.

TV Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Disco Inferno

Tony, being the schmuck that he is, wonders if this match will change the Disco vs. Jackie match because the (arguable) co-main event of the PPV doesn’t change if one guy is a champion or not. Disco grabs a quick armdrag and you would think he just won the world title. They go to a lockup and Page tries an early Diamond Cutter but the champion’s slick hair lets him get to the floor.

Back in and Page grabs a quick headlock but gets shoved into the ropes for a hip toss. Disco is actually hanging in this. Scratch that as Page his a neckbreaker to send Disco to the floor, where he gets hit by a baseballl slide and a plancha from Page. Back in and Disco still won’t die as he gets an elbow up in the corner to stop a charging Dallas. Page comes back by channeling the power of hair metal and slugs Disco down before hitting the Pancake. DDP treats Disco like the glorified jobber that he is and hits a Diamond Cutter out of a fireman’s carry (TKO), only to have Savage run in for the DQ.

Rating: C. Believe it or not, this wasn’t that bad. Disco was much better in the ring than he was given credit for, but when you have an awful (or brilliant depending on how you look at it) gimmick like a disco enthusiast, it’s kind of hard to get your in ring skills noticed. It was pretty clear something was going to be screwy with the ending but that’s weekly TV for you.

Post match Savage sends Page into the post and loads up a piledriver on the floor but Piper comes out for the save. Savage shoves him away so Piper spits in his face. Somehow this spins Savage around and there’s a Diamond Cutter on the concrete. Piper and Page bail into the crowd as the NWO runs out to protect the unconscious Savage. Savage gets taken out on a stretcher as Tony is almost giddy over a man being knocked unconscious.

Post break and here’s Piper in the ring with something to say. Apparently if Hogan had twice the amount of hair he had now he’d still be bald. Also Hall is lying when he says he beat Piper (when did Hall say that?) so we get a clip of Piper beating up Hall at Slamboree. Apparently the Outsiders, injuries or not, are going to defend the belts next week or they’re stripped of the belts. Also Savage vs. Page is Piper’s Rules, which would translate to last man standing.

Cue Bischoff and Hogan with Hogan staring down Piper. The Icon stuff stops now because Hogan is the real icon around here. Apparently everyone is here because of Hogan and at the PPV, Hogan is going to prove to Piper’s family that he (Hogan) is the real man. Bischoff fires off a kick to Piper’s bad leg and Hogan pounds away. He holds Piper for a Bischoff kick but Piper, elite level ninja that he is, ducks out of the way and Bischoff kicks Hogan. Piper beats on both of them until the NWO runs in for the save and Piper skedaddles.

Apparently if Mongo beats Jarrett at Havoc, Debra is gone from WCW.

Cruiserweight Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Ultimo Dragon

Eddie is defending. Apparently the main event of Benoit vs. Savage is canceled and it’s now Benoit vs. Hennig. After a quick armdrag by Eddie it’s off to a test of strength. Dragon goes down, only to bridge his body which won’t break even with Eddie’s full weight on it. That’s so awesome looking. Eddie elbows Dragon down but the challenger pops back up and hits a tilt-a-whirl slam to take over.

Dragon hits a hard kick to the back and puts on a chinlock to kill some time. Eddie fights up and hits a suplex to set up an abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so Dragon counters a release flapjack into a hurricanrana but Eddie snaps back up. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Dragon down again. That doesn’t get sold long either and here are the rapid fire kicks to stagger the champion. Guerrero heads to the floor where Dragon fakes him out before hitting a suicide dive to take Eddie down. Now it’s picking up a bit.

Back in and Dragon gets two off the dive he hit a second ago before putting on the Dragon Sleeper. Eddie gets his feet into the ropes though and Dragon has to break. Dragon puts the champ on the top rope for the super rana, only to get shoved down off the top. A tornado DDT lays Dragon out before hitting (most of) a long Frog Splash to retain.

Rating: B-. This started slow but once it picked up, it picked up BIG. I knew these two weren’t going to have a sluggish match as there’s just way too much talent out there to not put on an entertaining match. This was also good as Eddie had lost last week and he needed a clean win to keep him looking dominant going into the showdown with Rey at the PPV.

We look back at Hennig vs. Benoit on Saturday Night where Benoit had to fight off an invading NWO. The numbers caught up with him though and Benoit got beaten down.

Chris Benoit vs. Curt Hennig

I’m pretty sure this is non-title. Hennig talks to a fan in the aisle and Benoit jumps him to start. Benoit hits a big hard chop that sends Hennig into one of his usually overdone bumps but he hits his head on the steps. We head inside and the bell rings to start things off. Benoit is in full control and knocks Hennig off the apron and into the barricade. Back inside again and Benoit keeps stomping away before going to the middle rope.

Hennig finally gets in some offense in the form of a dragon screw leg whip to bring Benoit down. The Robinsdale Crunch keeps Benoit down and Hennig wraps the knee around the post. There’s a Flair cannonball but Curt uses the railing instead of the ropes. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that before.

We take a break and come back with Benoit hammering away back in the ring. Hennig goes into a RAGE and beats Chris down before taking off a buckle pad. Benoit reverses a whip to send Hennig into the buckle and rolls some Germans for two. Curt comes right back though by sending Benoit into the same buckle to set up the Perfect Plex for the pin.

Rating: B. Hennig’s intensity here made this a better match than I was expecting. These two beat the TAR out of each other and it made for a very entertaining match. The ending was a bit lame but I get why they wouldn’t want the newly lone wolf in Benoit to lose clean here. Benoit wanting to hurt Hennig more than beat him was the right move too, making this a very solid main event.

Post match the NWO comes out for the big beatdown but here’s Flair to get his revenge and try to destroy Hennig. Flair chases him to the back and into the parking lot but Hennig gets away. Ric comes back into the arena and says this is reality. He says he’s been Racked, Scorpion Deathlocked, leg dropped and put to sleep but he’s still right here. Flair talks about being Minneapolis born and bred before saying he’s the best of all time. He promises to get Hennig at Halloween Havoc if it’s booked or not. Flair rants about Hogan a bit to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The wrestling was a bit slower tonight than last week, but this built up Halloween Havoc very well. The show has now gone from a show with barely anything I want to see to a show that actually sounds pretty good in theory. Nitro is starting to click again at this point and it’s pretty cool to see.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 21, 2013
Location: Wembly Arena, London, England
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Todd Keneley, Tazz

It’s the last of the England shows and the main story tonight is that we get to know the winner of the tournament last week. The winner gets to face Hardy at Lockdown in three weeks so it’s about time they announced something. Other than that we’ve got two title matches which makes for a pretty packed show. Let’s get to it.

We open with the usual intro from last week, recapping both the tournament and Hogan being saved by Ray and Sting.

Hulk Hogan opens us up and talks about how Aces and 8’s interfered before he could announce the #1 contender last week. That interruption gave him an extra week to think about who should get the shot. This person showed that he was the only person who really wanted it. That person is…..Bully Ray. As in someone not even in the competition at all.

Here’s Ray but he isn’t sure what to think. He has a partially torn quad (whether that’s legitimate or not, the similarities to HHH/Stephanie/Vince continue) but Hogan cuts him off. Hogan says Ray is tough and Ray says it was the greatest day of his life when he married into this family. Bully wants a six man tag tonight with Aces and 8’s facing himself, Sting, and Hulk. Ray calls him dad and the match is made.

Bad Influences come in to visit Roode and Aries. They wish them luck in an eight man tag tonight.

Bad Influence/Bobby Roode/Austin Aries vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez/James Storm/Joseph Park

Storm vs. Daniels to start and the Cowboy quickly clotheslines him to the floor. Kaz throws Storm to the floor and everything breaks down quickly. It’s a big brawl and the good guys clear the ring. Park looks so proud but Chavo tells him to watch the elbows as we take a break. Back with Chavo working over Kaz with a front facelock before it’s back to Joseph Park. We’re told that the title match at Lockdown will be in a cage. As in just like every match at Lockdown ever?

Park gets caught in the wrong corner and the tag champions start beating him up. Or is it down? Either way they can’t suplex him which leads to a brief argument. Back to Daniels who rams Park’s head into the buckles and pounds away at the temple a few times. Everyone wants the tag but the heels get in an argument, nearly allowing Park to make the tag. Park comes back with a double clothesline to put Bad Influence down.

Roode and Aries walk out on their partners and it’s hot tag to Storm. He cleans house on everyone in sight and it’s off to Hernandez. SuperMex hits a few shoulders to knock everyone around and Chavo adds a frog splash to Daniels. The Last Call puts Daniels down and here’s Park with an a middle rope splash for the pin by Chavo on Kaz at 12:20.

Rating: C+. This was a fun tag match and I liked the way the egos got in the way of the heels’ success. That’s the logical way those characters would interact and it’s nice to see them not get along just because they’re all villains. It’s also good to see Storm back in the company he belongs in rather than slumming it with Godderz. Just please, no more Chavo and Hernandez in featured matches. I can’t handle it.

We recap Bully getting the title shot from earlier tonight.

We look at Rockstar Spud winning British Bootcamp and having a confrontation with Robbie E a few weeks back.

Robbie E. vs. Rockstar Spud

Spud almost immediately runs into a boot from Robbie to put himself down. Robbie hits a top rope elbow for no cover but misses a charge into the corner. A spinning DDT puts Robbie down and Spud goes up top. Spud misses a guillotine legdrop but the Rob’s get in an argument, allowing Spud to roll up Robbie for the pin at 2:46.

Post match Robbie E. yells at Big Rob and slaps him in the face. Big Rob stares him down and Robbie runs.

Jesse gives Tara a pep talk. The Knockouts Title match is next.

Knockouts Title: Velvet Sky vs. Gail Kim vs. Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

Tara is defending and this is under elimination rules. Brooke Hogan gets to be ringside because what would a segment be without her? The bell will be after this break. Jesse is ejected by Brooke and we’re ready to go. We get a bunch of quick rollup attempts but no pins early on. Tessmacher tries a victory roll on Tara but gets caught in an electric chair to send her out to the floor. Things settle down a bit and Tara hits the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on Sky, only to have the pin broken up by Gail. Why would she do that?

Now Tara and Gail go at it but Gail is sent to the floor for a bulldog from Tessmacher. Velvet and Tessmacher ping pong the champion back and forth with punches but Tara fights back. A moonsault hits Tessmacher but Velvet grabs Tara and hits In Yo Face, only to be broken up by Gail. Kim steals the pin on Tara to eliminate her, guaranteeing us a new champion.

Tessmacher hits a kind of spinning neckbreaker on Gail but goes up and gets crotched. Gail loads up a superplex put Velvet adds a powerbomb to make it a Tower of Doom. Velvet covers both opponents for two so she tries In Yo Face on Gail. Tessmacher tries to roll up Sky but Velvet rolls through it and covers Tessmacher for the elimination. We’re down to Velvet vs. Gail.

Sky pounds away to start but misses a dropkick to stop her momentum cold. Kim tries a cover but gets caught grabbing the ropes like a good villain should. Some shoulders in the corner miss and Velvet grabs a pretty sloppy sunset flip for two. In Yo Face hits this time and Velvet wins the title at 8:35.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but at the end of the day, what difference does this really make? Velvet is another person that happens to hold the title now. She’ll probably hold it for about three months before dropping it back to Tara or Gail and the cycle starts all over again. That’s the problem with the women’s divisions in both companies: they’ve been going around in circles for years.

Hogan and Sting get ready in the back. Sting leaves and runs into Bully who wants to make sure Hogan is cool. Ray thinks it’s cool to be tagging with the two of them.

We’ll get an update on AJ Styles next week.

We recap Samoa Joe, Kurt Angle, Wes Brisco and Garrett Bischoff. Angle vouched for Garrett and Wes but they joined Aces and 8’s to stab him in the back.

Samoa Joe vs. Garrett Bischoff

Garrett bails to the floor to start but gets in some shots to the knee once he’s back inside. Bischoff chokes away and stomps away a bit more as that’s about the extent of his offense so far. A shoulder tackle takes Joe down and it’s off to a chinlock. Joe comes back with an atomic drop and big boot, followed by a senton backsplash. The Facewash has Garrett in trouble in the corner and Joe loads up the MuscleBuster, only to have Brisco run in for the DQ at 5:06.

Rating: D. As I’ve said dozens of times, Garrett Bischoff is not that talented. Even in Aces and 8’s he comes off like a guy who is in a t-shirt pretending to be intimidating and powerful. Instead he’s actually a guy who has a very limited moveset and hasn’t won a match of note in about a year. Nothing to see here.

Kurt Angle makes the save and says it’s him vs. Brisco in a cage at Lockdown.

X-Division Title: Kenny King vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and gets dropkicked off the apron during his entrance. King rams him spine first into the post and slams Van Dam down to take over. A springboard legdrop misses the champ though but he kicks Van Dam right back down for two. King hits a spinwheel kick for the same result and a chinlock keeps Van Dam down for a bit.

Back to the chinlock but Rob fights up and hits some kicks to take over again. King counters a monkey flip by landing on his feet but can’t quite hit the Royal Flush, allowing RVD to kick out at two. King misses a pair of knees in the corner and takes Rolling Thunder as a result. The Five Star retains the title at 6:21.

Rating: C-. Of all the successful Van Dam defenses against King, this is the most recent. There was a mention of King beating Ion on Xplosion (sidebar: PUT XPLOSION ONLINE AND PROMOTE IT!!! TNA’s biggest problem is not enough programming and they never talk about the other hour they have. That’s an extra 50% of air time they could have and they NEVER mention it on air! Promote that instead of Dixie’s freaking Twitter!) but other than that there’s no reason for this match to happen. Either end the division or give it some attention.

Hulk tells Brooke that he has to do this.

Jeff Hardy will be back next week.

Hulk Hogan/Sting/Bully Ray vs. Aces and 8’s

It’s D-Von, Anderson and Doc here. Everyone comes out for the match but there’s no Hulk. We keep waiting for it and there’s still no Hogan. The music plays again but Aces and 8’s jump Sting and Ray to start things off. Sting and Ray fight back and Doc gets caught with a Stinger Splash as we take a break.

Back with Doc coming in to continue a beating on Bully. Off to D-Von for a falling headbutt and an unseen tag off to Anderson. After some basic pounding here’s D-Von again for a chinlock. Ray suplexes out of it though but Anderson breaks up the tag to Sting. Off to Doc again and he has to immediately stop a Ray comeback with more right hands.

Ray spears D-Von down and there’s the real tag to Sting. The Scorpion Death Drop gets two on Doc but Anderson makes the save. Anderson gets loaded up in What’s Up as the other bikers come out with both Hogans being held hostage. Hulk yells that his knee is hurt as it’s 3-1 against Sting. Doc hits a big boot and Aces and 8’s actually win a match at 11:26.

Rating: D+. Is this supposed to mean something for the bikers? They’ve lost so many times and now they can win a 3-1 handicap match that they had to cheat to win as well? The match was nothing of note and was rather boring for the most part, which isn’t a good sign heading into the second biggest show of the year.

Sting gets beaten down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This one didn’t do much for me. The matches were ok and the stories were advanced somewhat, but overall the show felt like it was tired. That’s perfectly understandable though as this was their fourth taping in a handful of days and it’s clear that they’re starting to drag. Next week they’ll have a fresh show and things should be back to normal though.

That being said, the Aces and 8’s stuff is getting tiresome. It’s clearly coming to a head at Lockdown, but hopefully it ends there or they REALLY revamp it. I’m bored by these constant losses or barely meaningful wins and I think most people are too. Not a bad show tonight but it was hardly lighting anything on fire.

Results

Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez/James Storm/Joseph Park b. Bad Influence/Bobby Roode/Austin Aries – Chavo pinned Kazarian after a splash from Park

Rockstar Spud b. Robbie E. – Rollup

Velvet Sky b. Tara, Gail Kim and Miss Tessmacher – In Yo Face to Gail

Samoa Joe b. Garrett Bischoff via DQ when Wes Brisco interfered

Rob Van Dam b. Kenny King – Five Star Frog Splash

Aces and 8’s b. Sting/Hulk Hogan/Bully Ray – Big boot to Sting

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

NXT
Date: February 20, 2013
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, William Regal

We’re back in Florida and we finally have some tag team champions in the form of Neville and Grey. The main story for tonight is the title match between Conor O’Brian and Big E. Langston which has been built up for weeks. Also I believe we find out who Sasha Banks’ secret admirer is, which would have been better suited for last week around Valentine’s Day but it’s not too far off. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the title win last week.

Opening sequence.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a good idea as the Wyatt Family lost last week, so having Wyatt himself get in the ring, I believe for the second time on NXT, is a way to redeem the Family. Wyatt no sells everything and throws Tatsu down with a wicked release Rock Bottom. A BIG running splash crushes Tatsu in the corner and a fast spinning Downward Spiral gets the pin at 1:37. Total squash.

Wyatt tells his family to get in the ring. He shows them a clip of the ending of the title match last week and blames Harper for the loss. He tells Rowan to hit Harper for it so Rowan smacks him in the face. Wyatt tells Harper to hit Rowan for having to carry Rowan. He says fight it out then tells them to stop because he’s proud of them. These three are still very creepy and it’s rather awesome.

Here’s Sasha Banks in the back and she’s excited about meeting the admirer. Another note is delivered and some brunette chick jumps Sasha. She (no name given but it might be Audrey Marie) beats Sasha down and says get out of NXT.

I’m Coming Home Wrestlemania video.

El Local vs. Xavier Woods

Local is Ricardo Rodriguez under a mask. They’ve taken away the Angel Grove part of Woods’ character, making him far less interesting already. Phillips says that Woods looks like Steve Urkel if he spent five days at the gym. Phillips wasn’t a fan of that show was he? The fans chant Power Rangers at Woods as he hits a leg sweep for two. Local hits a kick to the back of the head for two and stomps away in the corner.

A running low enziguri gets two more as Phillips declares Local to be portly. Local hooks a chinlock to no avail but he sends Woods into the corner for two. Back to el chinlock followed by another hard kick to the back of Woods’ head for two. There’s chinlock #3 as the fans are still staying with Xavier. Woods fights up and hits a flying headscissors to take over. A missile dropkick gets two so Woods takes him to the corner and a tornado DDT gets the pin at 4:40.

Rating: D. Remember how much fun Woods was before? Forget all that. Now he’s just a guy with an afro that dances a lot and has nothing interesting about him at all. The Power Rangers thing at least appealed to the nerds in the audience and had some nostalgia for people in their mid-20s, but this version of him is as dull as his name sounds.

The doctor says Paige’s shoulder is messed up but she’s improving.

Apparently O’Brian vs. Langston is NOT for the title. We’ve spent this much time hearing O’Brian talking about the title and building up the match and it’s NOT for the belt? Why in the world not?

Audrey Marie vs. Sasha Banks

Banks turns it into a brawl to start but Audrey pulls her by the hair to take over. Off to a half nelson on Banks which transfers into a chinlock and then a bow and arrow. Sasha comes back with a headscissors and a dropkick to the……uh…….Regal: “Sternum.” Phillips: “Yeah sternum.” Marie shrugs it off and hits a wheelbarrow facebuster (apparently called the Photo Finish) for the pin at 2:05. Short and ok.

Summer Rae isn’t concerned about Paige. She is however concerned with the nail she broke during the fight. Rae declares herself the first lady of NXT. It’s amazing how much more interesting the Divas are here when they’re treated even somewhat seriously.

New Orleans is hosting Wrestlemania XXX. I can’t wait.

Here’s the injured Tyson Kidd to update us on his condition. Kidd says he doesn’t know when he’ll be back but guarantees that he will be someday. Phillips asks Kidd about Punk calling Kidd an unappreciated workhorse. Kidd says he’s flattered and says that being a workhorse is a way of life, not something you learn. This brings out Leo Kruger who says Kidd looks like a wounded animal: weak and vulnerable. Leo kicks the crutch away but Justin Gabriel runs in for the save before anything bad can happen.

Conor O’Brian vs. Big E. Langston

Non-title for no apparent reason. The fans fire up Langston to start and they lock up. That goes to a standoff so they head to opposite corners and charge into another lockup. Langston charges into an elbow to stagger him and Conor pounds away in the corner. Langston punches back and clotheslines O’Brian to the floor as we take a break. Back with the champion going shoulder first into a post and O’Brian yelling a lot.

Off to an arm trap chinlock by O’Brian but a FIVE chant brings Langston back to life. Conor takes him back down with a full nelson slam for two and it’s the return of the chinlock. Langston fights up again and hits some knee lifts to the ribs before a slugout ensues. They brawl in the corner until the referee tries to break it up. That doesn’t work either so he throws it out at 6:34 shown of 10:04.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t that exciting but it did a great job at setting up a rematch down the line. O’Brian looked like he could easily hang with someone like Langston which was the biggest concern about him getting this show. This was a good old fashioned power brawl which is one of the hard to screw up formulas. Good stuff here.

Post match Corey Graves jumps Langston from behind to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. As is the case week in and week out with NXT, they can bring in a different batch of people every week and the stories stay consistently strong. Here we had some of the same names that we saw last week but there were also different names brought in to keep things fresh. That’s really impressive booking and it keeps the show from getting stale. Another good effort here as NXT stays strong.

Results

Bray Wyatt b. Yoshi Tatsu – Spinning Downward Spiral

Xavier Woods b. El Local – Tornado DDT

Audrey Marie b. Sasha Banks – Photo Finish

Big E. Langston vs. Conor O’Brian went to a double DQ when they wouldn’t stop brawling

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Now this is a headliner.Ric Flair

This is another one that does not need an explanation.  Ric Flair is a yes vote.

Peter Maivia

Based on everything I can tell, Maivia is on this list because his grandson agreed to induct him.  That grandson would be named the Rock and he hadn’t appeared on anything associated with WWE in years.  Maivia didn’t do much on the national stage but he wasn’t really around in the time of a national promotion.  At the end of the day though, I don’t think there’s enough on his resume to be in the Hall of Fame.  He was a talented wrestler, but he’s just not that great overall.

Rocky Johnson

Also inducted by the Rock, Johnson at least has a stronger body of work than his dad did.  Johnson was part of the Soul Patrol with Tony Atlas who were the first black world tag team champions.  Allegedly Johnson was going to be the top guy in the company before Hogan showed up and took the spot instead.  Other than that Johnson isn’t incredibly famous for his work in the ring, but he was a pretty big deal in the early 80s.  Again though, as for being in the Hall of Fame I’m thinking no.  The problem at the end of the day is that Rock inducting both he and Maivia seemed to be the whole reason for them getting in, and that’s not a good thing.

Mae Young

Young was a big deal back in the old days of women’s wrestling, but the problem is it’s still women’s wrestling.  No matter how you look at it, women’s wrestling has almost always been seen as a side show to its male counterpart.  Now that being said, it certainly doesn’t take away what Young has accomplished.  When you consider that Young was in her late 70s when she debuted in WWE and is still a fun attraction today, it’s hard to say she doesn’t belong in the WWE Hall of Fame.  If nothing else for the stuff she’s allowed the cameras to film her doing.

Eddie Graham

Graham is a name that most of you likely don’t know, but to say he was influential is an understatement.  Basically, think of a modern booking idea or technique.  The odds are that Graham thought of it first and someone stole it from him.  He was also a wrestler with a lot of success, but he’s far more famous as a booker than a wrestler.  Graham ran Championship Wrestling From Florida for many years, (Wrestlemania was held in Orlando this year).  Graham was one of the most versatile minds in wrestling history and easily belongs in any wrestling Hall of Fame.

Gordon Solie

Speaking of Florida, Solie was commentator on CWF for years.  He was known as the Dean of Professional Wrestling and made Jim Ross look like a hack when it came to calling matches.  Solie called matches for the better part of ever and was always entertaining to listen to.  He’s kind of like your local baseball commentator: he just feels right to listen to.  This is another layup for any wrestling Hall of Fame.

The Brisco Brothers

It’s a shame that Jerry is only remembered as one of the Stooges because he was amazing in the ring in his day.  Jerry was much more famous as a tag wrestler but he was excellent in the ring no matter what he did.  he was also an amateur champion and could hang on the mat with anyone.  That being said, he paled in comparison to his brother Jack.  Jack Brisco isn’t that well known by the modern generation but he’s one of the very best wrestlers that ever lived.  He was a two time world champion back in the days when that was still a huge deal.  The Briscos are both yes votes, but Jack is an emphatic one.

This isn’t the best class in the world.  The main appeal of this class was one of the presenters rather than the wrestlers and it’s one of the classes that make you scratch your head at some of the selections.  Still though, it has Flair and Brisco so I can’t complain much.

Cyberslam 1998
Date: February 21, 1998
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentator: Joey Styles

I downloaded this like three months ago and never got around to reviewing it. I also have the 99 version and November to Remember 1995 which is allegedly the best ECW show ever and I’ll be getting to those this week I hope. Anyway, this is the internet convention or whatever and it’s basically just a really big house show. As you all know I’m not that fond of ECW’s PPV years so let’s get to it.

Don’t like the company, still dig that freaking theme song.

We start with the ring filling up for a ten bell salute to Louie Spicolli who died 6 days before this show. Whoa wait: DROZ worked for ECW? Heyman talks about how there’s a group that talks about being a member of it for life. It’s a nice marketing line but in ECW that’s reality. This show is dedicated to Louie Spicolli and there’s a Louie chant. Ten bell salute goes off.

Danny Doring vs. Jerry Lynn

Lynn is “Dynamic” here. Was he ever not old? Even here he’s 35. Technical stuff to start and Doring struts a bit, which is called the Dastardly Shuffle by Joey. Dang those fans are loud. Lynn makes fun of the Shuffle and we get into some technical stuff. Roadkill trips Lynn but Doring misses a bottom rope (yes bottom rope) elbow. Rather back and forth stuff here as Lynn takes over again.

Suplex gets two and a headbutt misses to let Doring take over again. On the floor Roadkill and Doring mess up and the heels go into the crowd. Lynn is like cool dude and gets a running start off the apron and dives over the railing with a flip dive to take them both out. Lynn misses a middle rope leg drop and Doring takes over again. Tiger Bomb gets two for Doring but he might have hurt his elbow.

The distraction lets Roadie come in and hit a walk the top rope (AmishTaker according to Joey) elbow which the referee misses somehow. Doring of course has to be a jerk and wastes time so it’s only a two count. Doring puts him on top and Lynn hits a sunset bomb for the pin out of nowhere. Oh apparently Doring is afraid of heights. Got it. Makes limited sense but got it.

Rating: C. Meh match here but it wasn’t bad. Lynn is solid in the ring but Doring is just a wrestler and not that interesting in the slightest. Nothing match here but that doesn’t mean it was bad. They needed more to work with and Doring needs WAY more charisma, which he wouldn’t really get. Decent enough opener though.

Al Snow vs. Tracy Smothers

Al is in the middle of the push of a lifetime which would ultimately fail because Shane Douglas HAD to lose the title to Taz and NO ONE ELSE so Al’s push was wasted but whatever. Tracy is part of the FBI and is more or less a comedy character. The fans do the mannequin head rave thing. The entrance is taking forever. The ring is full of the heads now.

And now let’s keep the rave thing going and START THE SONG AGAIN. Snow clears the ring and shakes the head a lot. Somehow there’s a chair in the ring and we go through the introductions. All of Smothers’ entourage get introductions also. And let’s stall some more now. The bell has already rung by the way. The FBI leaves and Snow stays in the ring. And now there are birds chirping. Snow’s entrance started 8 minutes ago.

The bell rings again and we still haven’t had any contact here. AND THEY STALL AGAIN. They haven’t even touched each other yet, nor have they been in the ring alone more than 5 seconds in a row. Now the fans want pizza. Even free pizza couldn’t make this interesting. Hey they’re in the ring at the same time. HE LOCKED UP WITH HIM! There’s a Guido’s Polish chant.

Snow grabs the head again and I want a grilled cheese. I’d rather listen to the music video called Grilled Cheese from the new Looney Tunes Show than keep watching this “match.” Don’t ask why I know it’s on or anything. Just forget I said that actually. Smothers is on the floor again as we’re well over fifteen minutes into this segment now counting intros. Joey is making fun of the Godfather to kill time. Not the wrestler. The movie. We’ve sunk that low.

Snow stops to touch the mannequin again as the ring is filled with smoke for some reason. Did Van Dam get lost under the ring or something? Guido pulls the top rope down and we go to the floor to waste some time. The fans want to know where the fire is. We actually GET SOME WRESTLING and as average as it is, this is a breath of freaking air. Tommy Rich comes in with an Italian flag shot to change the momentum again.

Out to the floor and the FBI double teams Snow. You know if I told you Al Snow vs. Tracy Smothers was going to get twenty minutes in a segment with no signs of stopping, I might be tempted to say that show is going to suck. Double team in the ring now but it’s ECW so that’s all cool. Oh sweet merciful toothpaste it’s a chinlock. The Italian hits a…no screw that. I’m not wasting one of my signature lines on a twenty three minute (so far) Tracy Smothers match.

Sitout powerbomb gets two for Snow. Guido interferes AGAIN and a leg lariat gets two for Smothers. Snow starts his comeback and hits a moonsault for two. He sends Smothers to the outside and this a top rope moonsault onto all three Italians. Chair to the head slows him down a bit. Oh good night now the referee is bumped. EVERYTHING IS NO DISQUALIFICATION! WHY DO YOU NEED TO BUMP THE REFEREE???

The crooked referee Jeff Jones comes out and is in a WWF referee shirt and hat. Everyone beats on Al as Jones is like this is cool with me. Naturally four grown men and a flag stick beating on you for a minute is nothing though as Snow grabs the head and blasts everyone with it. Tommy Rich is bleeding. Snow Plow for all the heels and a top rope head shot to Tracy’s balls ends this.

Rating: I. As in if you don’t know what I thought of this match, go play in traffic. Like immediately. Let me put this in perspective. This match/segment got 32 minutes in total. The original Hell in a Cell match, as in probably the best match the Undertaker has ever had and one of the most violent matches ever, got thirty from bell to bell. Just let that sink in for a bit.

Doug Furnas vs. Chris Chetti

Furnas is “from the WWF”, complete with a manager dressed like Vince carrying a big WWF flag. That being said, he comes out to Sad But True which was one of the first rock songs I ever got into so I can’t say he’s not making me smile a bit. Actually I can say that, but it’s a figure of speech. You get the idea I’m sure. They go to the mat almost immediately and the fans applaud. Gee that’s nice of them.

Chetti gets some clotheslines but a rana is blocked by a powerbomb. Furnas starts in on the back and yells at the fans some. Into a Liontamer and Chetti takes a beating for awhile. Belly to belly superplex gets two. The fans chant boring so Chetti hits a DDT and a double jump moonsault for the pin. Even Joey sounds shocked.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here. Chetti wasn’t anything until he hooked up with Nova a few years later. This was just there to get Chetti on the card I guess. It kind of sucks that he wasn’t interesting in the slightest. Furnas had a good look but no one cared about it. The WWF invader thing didn’t help him either.

The Vince look-a-like says Furnas is property of the WWF and he’s not thrilled with that. Furnas raises Chetti’s hand and almost kills the manager (Mr. Wright).

Joey welcomes us to the show…an hour into it. He talks about a dream partner tag match on Sunday where the tag champions will both pick mystery partners and face each other. Chris Candido is picking Shane Douglas but Storm won’t say who he’s picking. Joey brings out the Triple Threat (ECW’s version of the Horsemen but with better looking women) to try to get some answers.

This incarnation is Douglas, Candido and Bigelow. They even have hand signals. Shane…just get over it dude. Sunny is hotter than it should be legal to be. This was during Shane’s RIDICULOUS title reign that I still say is what killed the promotion. Shane won the title and him dropping it to Taz was more or less set in stone. Then Shane got hurt and he kept the title an extra SIX MONTHS so he could drop it to Taz. The problem was that by the time he finally did it, Taz’s heat was gone and the title change meant nothing. Shane held the title for all of 1998 so him talking about Taz here wouldn’t be paid off for nearly a year.

Shane talks down to Taz about his TV Title as apparently the Triple Threat hasn’t been around long. Well at least this incarnation hasn’t. Shane wants to know who Storm’s partner is but Candido says it doesn’t matter. Sunny knows who the partner is but won’t tell anyone. Apparently there are a lot of secrets she has from Candido and they get in an argument. This of course was a fake fight and they would be reunited at the PPV when Sunny was the partner for about a minute. The REAL partner (I think) was AL Snow.

Lance Storm vs. Chris Candido

They’re tag champions and they HATE each other. For no apparent reason Candido does a full entrance here. All Storm to start and a baseball slide puts Chris in the fans. Big plancha takes Candido out further. DOWN GOES SIGN GUY!!! The fans of course like Sunny more than anyone else and can you blame them? Candido fires off some chops to get some WOOs going.

Storm misses Candido and almost hits his face on the buckle. Close enough I guess as he sells it anyway. Delayed vertical is countered but Candido gets a neckbreaker for no cover. He’d rather pose a bit instead. Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last long. Storm tries to make his comeback but gets caught in a release powerslam. Storm comes back with chops as there are fans dressed as Bigelow and Sabu.

Big spinwheel kick puts Chris down again as does a dropkick which gets two. Storm misses a jump though and gets crotched on the top. Belly to back superplex gets two for Candido. Northern lights suplex gets two. Powerbomb doesn’t work and Storm gets a kick to take over. Candido fires off a super rana but he delays in covering again so it’s only two. They go the top again and Storm fights back and hits the Blonde Bombshell (top rope powerbomb and Candido’s finisher) for the pin.

Rating: C. Eh not bad and WAY better than anything else tonight, but just kind of there. These two feuded forever and had much better matches but this was ok. I’d rather have just looked at Sunny for the ten minutes they had for the match though. Not much and the whole Candido/Sunny issues went nowhere.

TV Title: Brakkus vs. Taz

Brakkus is more or less an American version of Rob Terry and is also “a WWF guy”. Actually he was in WWF for awhile and did nothing at all. Taz takes him down almost immediately and hits the crossface punches. Brakkus hits a powerbomb and his manager Droz sets up a table. Another powerbomb hits but the powerslam through the table is countered into a suplex through it. Gorilla press is countered into a Tazplex and the Tazmission ends this quick. Taz would lose the title Sunday to Bigelow in the match where they broke the ring.

Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

First blood here. Dreamer in a gimmick match that makes things more violent? Who would have seen that coming? Justin has been talking about Tommy’s family apparently. Oh and they’re having a regular match Sunday. Of course they are. One great thing about these old ECW shows: Beaulah. She is freaking gorgeous on all levels. Dreamer brings a trashcan lid with him because that’s how he rolls.

Out to the floor almost immediately as the fans make fun of Nicole Bass. She’s Justin’s bodyguard if that clears anything up. Dreamer hits a slingshot into a chair into the post. So what was the point of the chair if the post was already back there? Cactus Clothesline over the railing by Dreamer puts them both into the crowd. Time to walk around the arena like in every big ECW brawl.

We’re already on our third chant that implies Bass is a male. Jason, Justin’s uh…..friend I guess, interferes and a reverse DDT puts Dreamer down. The chair gets wedged between the top two ropes and Dreamer goes head first into it. Justin suplexes him onto the chair which doesn’t really hurt the head. Then again no one accused Justin of being all that intelligent.

A second suplex is countered and here comes Dreamer. Neckbreaker out of the corner still doesn’t work on the head at all. Beaulah and Jason have a quick argument in the ring which results in the referee taking a road sign shot to the head. Death Valley Driver puts Justin down as the fans chant Louie. DDT onto the chair but still no blood.

Time for the barbed wire and Tommy wraps it around himself. Seriously, does no one in ECW think these things through? A splash off the top hits Justin and Dreamer is in agony. And here’s RVD with a top rope kick to put a trashcan into the head of Dreamer. Barbed wire into his head plus a trashcan to the barbed wire wrapped around Dreamer’s head busts him open. A tombstone kills Beaulah and the referee wakes up in time to see Dreamer’s blood to end this.

Rating: D+. Just a weak match here that for the most part had no psychology at all. The run in made no sense but I guess it’s something that you need to watch the TV show to get. Also, what’s the point in having a gimmick match a week before a regular match? Either way, nothing of note here and just your usual brawl in ECW.

Jason gets beaten up with barbed wire post match and Dreamer chokes him with it for a bit.

Here are the Dudleys who aren’t the tag champions at the moment. We do get the always funny Joel Gertner entrance. Apparently the Dudleys just got back from Japan and they’re now the United States Intercontinental TV Western States Heritage Tag Team Champions. Gertner does the entrances, saying that he delivers more package than UPS. Apparently Big Dick Dudley has damaged more hotels than the entire US Hockey Team.

D-Von is getting jiggy with it before your very eyes and is very muscular apparently and is the Super Cruiserweight Champion of the World. Ok then. Bubba is the chairman of the Dudleyville Olympic Committee. These things take forever but they’re always funny. Joel says this is the gold, now send in the silver and the bronze. Good line.

Dudley Boys vs. Balls Mahoney/Axl Rotten/Sandman

Rotten and Mahoney come out in like a minute. Sandman’s should take roughly four….except he’s coming through the entrance like a normal wrestler. I’m not sure what to make of that. Somehow the entrance still takes nearly five minutes. Bubba is still a country hick and he talks down to Sandman a bit. He wants to wrestle so he gets caned in the head.

The brawl begins of course and Big Dick (the third Dudley) can’t be hurt by kendo stick shots. Instead he hits a chokeslam to Sandman and pounds away a bit. This is one of those matches where it’s just a wild brawl with no real coherence or anything like that. The Dudleys are in control here other than D-Von who is having issues with Axl. Balls hammers on Bubba as well as Sandman crashes to the floor. Oh that was an “elbow drop”. Got it.

Bubba vs. Balls in the ring at the moment. Superkick puts the future Bully down but Bubba manages a superplex of all things. We’ve got a cheese grater to the head of Rotten and he’s busted now. D-Von is beating on him now. There’s no tagging or semblance of order if for some reason you’re confused and were expecting some.

Mahoney is thrown into the crowd for a bit. All three Dudleys put him on a table while his partners are in the ring and down. Bubba goes up on some stage to dive off…and here’s New Jack. He clocks Bubba with a chair and dives onto Balls instead. Spike Dudley and Kronus are in the ring now and it’s a 9 man triple threat tag team match now. Sure, why not?

Dudley Boys vs. Balls Mahoney/Axl Rotten/Sandman vs. Spike Dudley/John Kronus/New Jack

New Jack’s song plays throughout the match even though Spike and Sandman are the only guys in the ring. Spike gets a bunch of two counts off various small person offense. Sandman goes to the floor but Spike misses a baseball slide. Kronus is busted. Balls is busted. You can make your own jokes there. A standing version of the move that would become known as What’s Up hits New Jack.

The most famous combination of the Dudley Boys sets for the 3D on New Jack but Jack falls down. The big brawl is still going here but it’s far slower. Granted they’ve been fighting for over ten minutes, but why are the new guys so tired? Kronus and Sandman both work on Big Dick. Lucky. It’s table time but it’s not set up. Pretty much just random punches with an occasional weapon being used.

Mahoney gets a belly to back suplex on Spike and sets for a moonsault through the table. Spike pops up and gets something like a tornado DDT through the table to Balls. Axl hits a REALLY inverted reverse DDT to eliminate Spike’s team. Yes this is elimination now. Bubba calls for the 3D on Sandman but the partners interfere. Something resembling a Stun Gun onto a chair is enough for Sandman to pin Bubba and end this.

Rating: D+. I still don’t like these things but at the same time this wasn’t as bad as some of these got. The biggest issue of all is the time, as this ran nearly 20 minutes. Far too long but they kept it mostly entertaining. The extra three guys coming in helped as it energized things a bit. Not horrible but nothing we haven’t seen a few million times already.

Shane Douglas/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Rob Van Dam/Sabu

Main event here and at least Francine is looking good. The entrances take a good while. And now we stall. Shane is starting for his team. Not sure on an opponent at the moment but Fonzie blows the whistle a lot. Ok so it’s Rob. He has his own whistle and gets into a whistling contest. Whistling while stalling? Larry would be proud (double rep to the first person to get this reference. It’s about Larry Zbyszko, but what makes this one special?)

Rob fires off strikes but Shane avoids all of them. Van Dam tries his split legged move but gets stomped on to give Shane a brief advantage. Rob takes over with a kick and it’s time to work on the arm. Now Shane works on the arm. Off to Sabu who throws on the one arm camel clutch. Both non Triple Threat guys hit slingshot legdrops which gets a total of two on Shane.

Back to the Clutch and let’s WHISTLE BABY! Or since it’s Fonzie let’s WHISTLE DADDY! Total domination of the champion so far. Rob suplexes him back into the ring after a quick trip to the apron which gets two. More Clutching and Rob adds a spin kick to the back. Rob struts and says WOO but his split legged moonsault eats knees. Hot tag to Bigelow and Van Dam is in trouble.

DDT gets two as Sabu has to save. Double underhook release powerbomb and a headbutt by Bigelow and it’s back to Douglas. You know because he did so well in the first five minutes right? His hair is untied now so he looks a bit more ticked off. Time for the chinlock but Rob escapes and brings in Sabu. Time for the weapons to come in as Shane is sent to the floor and popped with a chair to the back.

Back in the ring a butterfly suplex puts Sabu down and we get a pair of tags. Bigelow mauls Van Dam but Greetings From Asbury Park is broken up. Sabu kind of hits a dive to the floor to Shane as this is breaking down quickly. Van Dam manages a decent rana on Bigelow all things considered. Everyone is on the floor now and Bigelow rams Rob into the post. Shane crotches Sabu on it as well and the Triple Threat is in control.

Bigelow and Van Dam are in the crowd now with Bigelow dominating him. Rob fights out and hits something that the cameras mostly miss. Sabu and Van Dam hit what would be called Poetry in Motion but Sabu botches it and hits Shane in the balls instead of the chest. Top rope….something takes Bigelow down as the tagging has been completely forgotten by this point.

Shane ducks a kick to send Rob into the ropes. Bigelow throws Shane over the top into the other two guys to take them both down. Apparently there was a table in there but you couldn’t see it. They’re walking around now because they’ve used most of their spots now. Table is brought in by Bigelow but according to hardcore wrestling law #1, he goes through it. Van Daminator takes Shane down for two.

Everything slows down now as another table is brought in and they have to take their time to make sure their plan goes perfectly well. Sabu puts Shane on the table and he goes through it. I don’t mean Sabu did anything to put him through it. I mean the table couldn’t hold his weight. What do you think the fans think of that? Shane goes through another table head first (it was in the corner) but Bigelow saves again. Fonzie gets involved and Bigelow tosses him away. Greetings From Asbury Park out of nowhere to RVD ends this.

Rating: D+. The first half of this when it was a regular tag match was pretty decent but after that it just fell apart. These guys getting 23 minutes just wasn’t a good idea at all. If you cut off about 8 minutes of the brawling, this would be a pretty good match. Shane is so out of his element in brawls it’s unreal. I mean, he’s just a decent in ring wrestler. What place could he possibly have in a wrestling company?

Sabu and Van Dam tease brawling post match but that wouldn’t be for awhile if I remember correctly.

Overall Rating: D. Well this could have been a lot worse. It’s really not a horrible show but with a lot of the matches just being bizarre choices (I mean seriously, Snow vs. Smothers for HALF AN HOUR???) and some matches seemingly running out of ideas halfway through, it’s hard to get into this. Not horrible, but really just a big house show. Nothing wrong with that, but not very inspiring.

It may be weaker at the top but it’s very strong throughout.

Dusty Rhodes

While not much in the WWE, he was HUGE elsewhere and one of the most influential people in the history of wrestling.  If you want to talk about someone who is a lifer in wrestling, Rhodes is a good place to start.  He debuted 45 years ago and is still active in wrestling today.  Think about that for a minute.  That’s a LONG time to do anything, let alone be in wrestling.  Rhodes is a yes, and if you’re not familiar with some of his stuff from the 70s, look it up.  It’s far different than what he’s most famous for.

Curt Hennig

Hennig is one of those guys where the more I see of him, the more I’m impressed by him.  He had nearly unlimited talent and one of the best gimmicks in wrestling history.  Hennig came as close to living up to the name Mr. Perfect as you could get and the various sports vignettes he had were some of the best promos ever.  He never won the WCW or WWF World Title but he had a year long reign as AWA World Champion which is still solid enough to count for something.  This is another easy yes.

Jerry Lawler

Lawler is another guy that is legendary in the indies and one in particular, but he’s equally if not even more famous for being the co-voice of Monday Night Raw and therefore the WWF as a whole.  Lawler has been doing commentary for about twenty years now as well as still wrestling occasionally.  He’s never won a title in the WWE but he’s never needed to.  Lawler has long since been at the level where his reputation is safe no matter what he does.  Lawler is another yes and one of the few people who would make it into both the WWE Hall of Fame and any other wrestling Hall of Fame as well.

Nick Bockwinkel

This is another name that isn’t that well known by a lot of young fans but he certainly should be.  Bockwinkel was the father of the smart heel, as he was very crafty but also very skilled in the ring.  Before him, most heels were monsters that a hero would have to vanquish.  Bockwinkel came along and changed the entire idea, showing that heels could win with their minds instead of brute force.  He’s very similar to Ted DiBiase in that regard, which makes him a very influential man indeed.  He held the AWA World Title for over eight years combined and the tag titles for over three years.  That alone makes him an easy yes vote.

Mr. Fuji

I love Mr. Fuji!  (Five points if you get that reference)  This one might surprise you.  Fuji was a pretty lame manager, but he was a very accomplished tag wrestler.  He was a five time WWF Tag Team Champion and holds the record for most days spent as a tag team champion.  He held a tag title for 932 days.  Billy Gunn is second at 916 and had twice as many reigns.  The next place down is over seven months shorter.  Fuji managed Demolition during a large portion of their record tag title run and also managed Yokozuna to the WWF Title.  On top of all that, he was in FUJI FREAKING VICE (look that up if you want some old school hilarity).  I was thinking no at first but a little research says he belongs in the Hall of Fame.

Jim Ross

If Jerry Lawler is in, Jim Ross has to be in too.  He’s been the voice of the WWE for what seems like ever now and he continues to be a great commentator.  His acting isn’t exactly top notch half the time and he can be more than a little annoying, but the best way I can sum up JR is this: he and Lawler on commentary just feels right.  Ross was also a force behind the scenes as he was VP of talent relations for a long time.  He’s a jack of all trades in wrestling and again I have no problem with him being inducted.

The Sheik

Not the Iron Sheik but just the Sheik.  This is a guy you probably haven’t heard of but if you’re a fan of ECW or Mick Foley or Terry Funk, you need to research this guy.  He’s arguably the father of hardcore wrestling in the US and was legendary in his main territory of Detroit.  Sheik also trained Raven and Sabu, which may or may not be a good thing in your eyes.  As for being in the Hall of Fame, this is more of a personal issue but I’m saying no.  Hardcore wrestling has done more to hurt wrestling than anything else and Sheik introduced the style to the world.  I’m saying no based on that alone.

The Wild Samoans

This is the team that started the entire tradition in the wrestling world.  From The Rock to Yokozuna to Rosey to Roman Reigns, it all started here.  The Wild Samoans were a very successful tag team and won multiple tag titles over the years.  Afa also has been a successful trainer and trained Mickey Rourke for the movie The Wrestler.  This is another team that is a yes, although there are a few other teams I would put in over them.

This is one of the most stacked classes from top to bottom ever and probably the best one yet with no huge negatives.

Apparently Swagger was arrested last night after the Smackdown tapings on an undisclosed traffic offense.  No word on if alcohol was involved or not or if this is legit or storyline based.  I don’t see any indication that it’s an angle though.  Also no word on what this means for Wrestlemania.  It’s still early enough to change the match if need be.

Update: Apparently it was DUI and possession of marijuana.  Bye bye Wrestlemania.  Nice going Jack.

Monday Nitro #107
Date: September 29, 1997
Location: DCU Center, Worcester, Massachusetts
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

We’re getting closer to Halloween Havoc and to the best of my memory, nothing has been officially set for the card yet. Hogan vs. Sting is starting to heat up as Piper is trying as hard as he can to get the match set by the end of the year. Other than that tonight we’re likely to get another appearance by Goldberg who debuted last week. Let’s get to it.

We open with the usual from Tony and the Nitro Girls.

Video on Page vs. Savage, which I’m sure will be discussed tonight.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Buff Bagwell

At least Kimberly looks great tonight. They stare at each other for awhile to start before Bagwell armdrags him down, meaning it’s time to dance. A shoulder block puts DDP down as well as we’re in slow motion still. Raven is in the front row again with Richards behind him. Page comes back with a clothesline and a second one sends him out to the floor. A pescado hits Bagwell and Page rips up a sign for no apparent reason. Back in and Buff hurts his own knee off a leapfrog attempt. I smell a freshly painted gold brick and indeed I’m correct.

Buff takes over and chokes away as we hear that Larry is going to referee a match at Halloween Havoc. Bagwell stops to tell the camera that he is indeed this good looking and here’s Page with a comeback. An atomic drop sets up more punches from DDP but Buff blocks the Diamond Cutter. Bagwell and the referee argue, allowing Page to get two off a rollup. Vincent tries to cheat so Page gets sent into a distracted referee. There’s the Diamond Cutter to both Vincent and Buff and the referee comes in for the three count.

Rating: C+. This was WAY better than I was expecting with the crowd staying hot almost the entire time. Page overcoming the odds like this including having to beat both Vincent and Bagwell was a solid idea as Bagwell has nothing to lose. This was a solid choice for an opener and it got the crowd going which is the right idea.

Page climbs into the crowd and runs into Raven for a staredown.

Apparently Mike Tenay went down to Mexico and has filmed a bunch of mini documentaries about lucha libre. We get a preview here, talking about how big lucha libre is and the importance of family in the business. I remember thinking these were interesting back in the day.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. El Caliente

Caliente is a masked guy who looks a lot like Eddie Guerrero. Whoever he is he jumps Rey from behind and steals the mask that Mysterio was going to give to a fan. Rey has his back rammed into the buckle and Caliente hits Eddie’s slingshot hilo. Mysterio comes back with a standing Lionsault into an armdrag as things speed up. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Caliente down but he comes back with an elbow to the face. Rey counters a suplex into an armdrag but the much bigger guy pounds Mysterio down.

Caliente goes for the mask as Tenay talks about lucha de apuestas (bet matches). The fans start chanting Eddie as they’re in on the joke now. A BIG powerbomb gets two for Calieddie and it’s off to an abdominal stretch. Even Tony knows something is up now, and if Tony Schiavone can figure it out, the secret is pretty obvious. A superplex puts Mysterio down but Caliente stops himself from using the Frog Splash. They head to the corner where Rey hits an INSANE double jump into the West Coast Pop for the pin.

Rating: C+. Solid match here with a great looking ending but it would be blown away by their rematch at Halloween Havoc. Eddie and Rey had some amazing chemistry together and the fans loved almost every match they ever had. Good stuff here and a nice idea with the mask to mix things up a bit.

Post match the mask is taken off and of course it’s Eddie.

Giant says he’s coming for revenge on Hennig tonight. Sting is in the audience as he says this.

Bill Goldberg vs. Barbarian

Neither guy gets an entrance. Tenay has some facts about Goldberg now: he played football at the University of Georgia and for the Atlanta Falcons. Feeling out process to start before Goldberg hits a shoulder block to stagger Barbarian. A DROPKICK of all things sends Barbie out to the floor. Now there’s something I never thought I would see from Goldberg. Goldie goes up top but gets crotched for taking too much time.

As Barbarian pounds away on him, we get a split screen of Goldberg’s win last week. Are they running REALLY behind on time already or something? They don’t even have time to show that pre-match? Goldberg charges into a powerslam but comes back with a clothesline and hits a knee drop. His offense is totally different than it would become eventually. Actually scratch that as the Jackhammer ends this clean. No spear yet but he does have generic rock music here.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing special but the angle of having someone brand new out there getting wins is a very interesting idea. We see this a lot, but having someone completely anonymous is a twist on it. Goldberg’s past never would be filled in and there’s nothing wrong with that. You didn’t need a character for him, which is something modern wrestling forgets at times. Just having someone being tough works quite well and Goldberg is the classic example.

Okerlund still can’t get a word with Goldberg so instead he brings over Larry Z. to talk about the match he’s refereeing at Halloween Havoc. Apparently it’s Luger vs. Hall and Larry isn’t going to cheat because it would make the victory cheap. True actually.

Tony plugs Nitro dates as the Nitro Girls dance. He also apologizes for walking out two weeks ago due to Flair’s injuries, which I don’t think anyone was complaining about. Flair has an announcement later tonight.

TV Title: Disco Inferno vs. Juventud Guerrera

Disco is defending after winning the title in a shocker last week. Feeling out process to start as Larry and Mike talk about a wrestling ballet dancer they used to know. Juvy hits a fast rana to start and a springboard dropkick followed by a spinwheel kick. The champion heads to the floor and there’s a big flip dive to take him out again. Back in and the Inferno counters a rana attempt into a hot shot to take over. Disco pounds away on the back and stomps in the corner.

Alex Wright comes out in some loud yellow pants to dance at the entrance way as Disco is in full control. As the champion goes for a cover, Wright puts Juvy’s foot on the rope. Guerrera uses the distraction to grab a rollup for two and a spin kick gets the same. Jackie comes out to yell at Wright as the match is completely ignored. She trips up Juvy for no apparent reason and a front suplex by Disco retains the belt.

Rating: D. Juvy’s parts were good but this is Disco Inferno vs. Juventud Guerrera in a five minute match for the lower card title. Did we really need two people interfering as part of a feud that hasn’t been fully explained yet? The match wasn’t terrible but the overbooking brings it down a good bit.

Hour #2 begins and here’s the NWO with something to say. This incarnation would be Savage and Liz with the former warning Piper to not mess with his match with Page. Oh and Savage wants Sting too, much like everyone else in the NWO.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve McMichael

The fans are all over Jarrett here as Tony talks about the problems between Steve and Debra. Apparently they’ve split and Debra lives in Georgia now. Jarrett takes him down and struts a bit, only to charge into a half Rock Bottom half Boss Man Slam. A forearm puts Jarrett down again and a big boot puts him on the floor. We take a break and come back with a fight on the floor and McMichael going head first into the post twice in a row. Debra takes this opportunity to talk about how pretty she is.

Back inside they go and Debra pulls on Steve’s hair from the floor. McMichael comes back with a suplex and the fans react rather positively. There’s a sleeper from Jeff and Bobby gives about four ways to get out of it. Heenan is a lot of things but a good analyst isn’t usually one of them. McMichael escapes and hooks a sleeper of his own but Jarrett quickly suplexes out of it.

A shot into the buckle does no damage to Mongo’s head so Jarrett tries it two more times. Mongo pounds away in the corner and hits a side slam. As McMichael loads up the tombstone, Jarrett counters with a jawbreaker. It’s time to work on the leg but Steve kicks off the Figure Four. Mongo and Debra get in an argument though, allowing Jarrett to hit a fast dropkick and get a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C-. As usual with these two, it wasn’t bad but it wasn’t interesting at all. Jarrett never really got over as a heel in this run, although the crowd chants at the start of the match were a good sign. Regarding Mongo, earlier tonight I watched the end of Wrestlemania 11 and saw Lawrence Taylor in his only match ever as a wrestler. In that ten or so minute match, Taylor showed more fire and potential than McMichael showed in his entire career. The guy just wasn’t that good and there’s not much else to it than that.

The announcers talk about Sting.

We get a clip from last week of Scott Hall beating up Mark Curtis.

Chris Jericho vs. Syxx

Hall is at ringside with Syxx here and is on crutches. Syxx hooks that jumping headlock of his (the one where he looks like he’s having a fit) but gets sent off the ropes and caught in a powerslam. Syxx comes back with a spin kick and we get the crane pose from Karate Kid. Jericho gets chopped in the corner and gives a look that says “I would beat the tar out of you for that if I could move a muscle right now).

A kind of Michinoku Driver puts Jericho down but a kind of Swanton Bomb misses. Syxx heads to the apron and gets caught by the springboard dropkick to knock him to the floor. A running dive takes Syxx down again and we head back inside. Jericho gets two off a cross body from the top and there’s a giant swing.

The Lionsault looks to set up the Liontamer (Walls of Jericho) but a Hall distraction lets Syxx hook the Buzzkiller (crossface chickenwing) for….no submission as Hall come sin to rub the referee’s stomach. Jericho is still in the hold but here’s Larry Z to break it up. Luger comes out to even the odds and the match is thrown out. The NWO bails.

Rating: C. This was pretty decent but it was about the post match stuff more than the match. That’s perfectly fine as Jericho didn’t mean all that much yet although that would change soon enough. Zbyszko vs. Hall was a nice idea for a feud, but a little more explanation of why they’re fighting and what their history was (they fought in the AWA a bit but that was never specified on Nitro) would have helped.

Here’s Flair’s announcement on the phone. Tony sounds like a lover hearing Ric for the first time when he wakes up from a coma. Flair says that he respects the fans and wants no one to feel sorry for him. He thanks Hennig for giving him the wakeup call that he needed and promises to be back to settle the score. He’ll also be coming for the robe that Hogan stole from him. Now for the major announcement: the Horsemen are officially disbanded. It’s not fair to them to put their careers on hold and worry about Flair all the time. Flair promises illegal and immoral revenge on Hennig and the NWO. Solid stuff here as expected.

Here’s Bischoff with something else to say. Eric complains about Sting being here when Hogan isn’t here because Sting is clearly scared. Hogan has been calling out Sting for weeks, so why didn’t Sting show up then? Bischoff things Piper and Sting are in cahoots and dares Sting to try to help Piper at Halloween Havoc.

Lex Luger vs. Wrath

Luger pounds away to start and the fans are hot as usual. We hear about Mongo and Jarrett fighting in the background. Talk about it all you want, just please don’t make us have to watch it. Luger misses a charge into the corner and Wrath gets to take over for a bit. Wrath is one of those guys that got a very strong push at various times but then he had to talk. That hayseed voice of his was something he never could overcome. Anyway this is exactly what you would expect: Wrath hits some big power moves including a top rop clothesline but Luger reverses a suplex to come back. Punches, clotheslines, Rack, submission.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as usual. Luger beating up monsters has become played out by now due to how often it happens anymore. I’ll give him this though: the fans never seem to get bored with him, so why mess with a winning formula? Wrath continues to look better than I ever remember him looking.

The Nitro Girls dance a bit and Bischoff takes Heenan’s spot in the announce booth.

Curt Hennig vs. Giant

Non-title. Giant throws Hennig around as you would expect him to before spitting on him in the corner. There’s what we would call a Stinkface and Curt falls to the floor. Giant suplexes him back in and chops away as this is one sided so far. A knee lift sends Hennig flying but he avoids a charge to send Giant out to the floor. Back in and Hennig hits a PERFECTPLEX on Giant. And it was an AWESOME one too! Giant of course pops out at two and hits the chokeslam but here’s the NWO for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This gets a decent grade for that Perfectplex alone. Hennig got him up in the air and even hooked the leg for a good bridge. I never would have expected him to be capable of doing that. The match was what you would expect other than that though and was barely long enough to grade.

Giant fights off the troops for a bit but the numbers (and a belt shot from Norton) catch up to him. Sting comes out for the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was one of the best episodes of the show in a long time. Almost all of the matches were crisp and fast paced and we built up Halloween Havoc at the same time. Given all of the nonsense that came out of WCW, a lot of people forget how awesome they could be at times. This was a good example of that as the show was great and flew by. Good episode and one of the best they’ve had yet.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

SuperBrawl IV
Date: February 20, 1994
Location: Gray Civic Center, Albany, Georgia
Attendance: 7,600
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

For no reason that I can find anywhere, this was never released on home video. I simply don’t understand that. Why not? It doesn’t look like much on paper but WCW and Turner would put ANYTHING on VHS to make a quick buck off of it. Bischoff is in charge now kind of and Bill Watts is gone so the show is more or less automatically better than last year’s was. Flair is booking the show mind you, so this really is a new era for the company.

This is highlighted by two Thundercage matches which more or less is a cage that curves up to the top. It’s nothing special but it’s Vader vs. Flair so I can’t complain. Other than that the card is more or less a complete mess with so much going on that it’s hard to really see a point at all. Let’s go as I haven’t seen this show ever before.

The opening video talks about various matches going on tonight, none of which sound interesting in the slightest. Ok Vader vs. Flair sounds ok. We actually see Flair training which is something you never really see. He says he’s going to run Vader out of gas. If anyone could do that, it’s Flair.

His cardiovascular conditioning is better than anyone’s in history more than likely. Seeing him lift weights is just odd indeed. For no apparent reason, Big Boss Man is refereeing there. We also have Badd vs. Michael Hayes which started out yesterday but tonight they’re FINALLY settling it.

Michael Hayes vs. Johnny B. Badd

Badd is still just a comedy character that no one likes yet. Actually people like him. They’re just idiots though. He has two Badd Blasters to shoot freaking glitter and confetti though as he has nothing better to do with his life. And Hayes is in a wheelchair with Jimmy Garvin pushing him.

Hayes says that he fell down the stairs but Garvin says that he slipped on a banana peel while they suck up Nick Bockwinkle. I actually don’t recognize Garvin with short hair. That mullet he had could have shielded a small country. He shoots his mouth off and he’s the replacement now. Ok so the match is with Garvin and apparently in 45 minutes or so.

Harlem Heat vs. Thunder and Lightning

Thunder and Lightning were rookies, meaning this had no point being on PPV. Harlem Heat would one day become great but here they’re relatively new. They debuted in August so it’s not like they’re well known or anything. Also they’re named Kane (Stevie Ray) and Kole (Booker T). Heenan rips the white guys like there’s no tomorrow as he’s in his element here. Seriously, Thunder and Lightning is the best name you can come up with?

I never got the Heat having their names changed. They look exactly the same as they would in later years with the same outfits and everything but their names were changed. It helped a lot but I never got the point to it. You could tell that Booker had that it factor to be a big deal. Tony thinks the winner here should get a title shot. We get a camera into Flair’s dressing room to show that he is indeed sitting in it. Apparently Steamboat gets a title shot at the next PPV.

That one is coming soon. Thunder gets the hot tag and no one cares. His dropkick misses completely but Kane (that just sounds weird to type) sells it anyway. Kole kicks the heck out of Thunder for the pin.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but I just couldn’t have cared less. Heenan calling them Batman and Robin the whole time was funny if nothing else. This just wasn’t very good. It’s not bad to be fair, but this got 10 minutes for two rookie teams. Who thought this was a good idea?

There’s a ton of security outside Flair’s dressing room as Vader threatened him.

Jungle Jim Steele vs. The Equalizer

Steele is I think an Indian character or something. Oh it’s Tarzan or something. This feels like something from the mid 70s. Apparently Steele has been on a winning streak or something but he keeps winning in like three minutes. Equalizer would be Evad Sullivan in a few months. Again, this is getting PPV time. What does that tell you about 1993-1994 WCW? Steele doesn’t even have a Wikipedia page.

Seriously, JUNGLE JIM Steele? That’s the best they can come up with? He looks like a combination of Jimmy Snuka and Ultimate Warrior. What does that tell you? They try to point out the history of great opening matches in SuperBrawl history, although the matches they mention didn’t open the show. We hear the name Hulk Hogan. Yeah that’s not foreshadowing at all. And Steele hits a Thesz Press for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: F-. It’s called the Steele Trap. That makes this a failure alone. I can’t emphasize how stupid this was. Seriously, THIS got 7 minutes of people paying for it. That boggles my mind.

The question on the Hotline is was it fair for Bockwinkle to say Garvin has to wrestle or be suspended. Yeah he’s going to suspend a retired guy.

Steamboat is named the official number one contender to the winner of Flair vs. Vader. Gene asks if he knew about the added security in the locker room he left to come do this interview. My head hurts again. Dang how awesome would a long Steamboat vs. Vader have been?

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Terry Taylor

Page is a biker here as he’s more or less worthless. Then we have Taylor who just is worthless. Page had been doing this thing where he would draw names out of a bowl for who he was going to fight but they were always retired or something like that. Taylor called him out so Page got a box full of bricks and hit him in the head with it, which should have killed him. I can’t get over this: it is 1994 and TERRY TAYLOR is wrestling on PPV. How in the world is that possible?

Page is REALLY bad at this point as he’s completely unpolished and was just a really hard worker. Page hooks a cobra clutch as his offense was just all over the place at this point. I don’t think he had the Diamond Cutter yet. Apparently the future world champion taught Randy Orton how to wrestle given all of these chinlocks.

This is ridiculous anymore with all the rest holds. It always makes me wonder: what are they resting from? And then Taylor throws DDP into the corner and rolls him up for the pin. Again, it was like they ran out of time and had to finish all of a sudden.

Rating: D-. Dude, TERRY TAYLOR was on PPV in 1994. Why would I want to pay my money to watch this nonsense?

The WCW announcer from Germany is here. And moving on.

Spring Stampede is the next PPV. Again, that one is coming as it Slamboree 94 so I’ll have all PPVs from 1994 covered.

Johnny B. Badd vs. Jimmy Garvin

I have to put up with his entrance twice tonight. What bus full of nuns did I run over in a previous life? The Freebirds would be gone in about two months. This is another one of those matches that have no business being on PPV but it is anyway and will get at least ten minutes. I get that this was Flair’s first time booking, but seriously, get him some better talent and have Flair think some more. In the last match it was a lot of chinlocks.

This is a lot of using the armbar. Oh and a lot of strutting. This is another one of those matches that just isn’t interesting at all but they just keep going with it anyway because they have to fill time. I hate matches like that. Let’s have another armbar while we’re at it.

Garvin controls most of the match because it makes sense for a guy that wasn’t very good in the first place to “not wrestle for two years” to come back and dominate the younger and better guy in Badd. Badd gets his big knockout punch and then has to go up top for the sunset flip off the top. Post match the heels beat up Badd with what would become known as the Stunner.

Rating: D. Again, WHY WOULD I PAY FOR THIS STUFF??? Garvin isn’t even a big name other than from about 7 years before. This would be like having Maven wrestle on Raw. There’s no point to it and the match was boring anyway.

Vader is banging a chair against a wall and shouts no interviews at Gene.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Arn Anderson

The real man’s man is the champion here. The idea here was simple: they just kept telling these two to go out and have a 25-30 minute war so they did about 4-5 times, including here. The only problem here was that the fans didn’t really want to see these two do that match this often, as a lot of the time they were about 10 minutes of chinlocks and rest holds. They were interesting to a point, but once they fell off they fell off quickly.

We have Buffer doing the intro here so you know it’s a big deal. Anderson is said to be from Apple Valley, Minnesota. Is that some nickname for Minneapolis which is where he’s been from EVERY OTHER TIME? The title looks different here and they should have stuck with that one as it’s much better looking than the one that it usually was. They start with a long wrestling sequence which is ok but it’s just kind of boring. Screw the kind of aspect. This is boring already.

Bobby tries to push the PPV to people to buy it halfway through. He does get in a good NASCAR line saying that if he wanted to watch cars go by he’d go sit by the interstate. That’s very true actually. We’re six minutes in and they’re still feeling each other out. Regal busts out a nip up. That came from nowhere. Regal works on the arm. He works on it very slowly, but he is indeed working on it. Arn works on Regal’s arm.

I wish someone would work on my arm so I’d have something to be interested in. We’ll ignore the big bandage on Regal’s leg because it would make too much sense to do that I guess. This is just a freaking boring match. There’s a ton of arm work but it’s like they’re just meandering from spot to spot as Arn FINALLY works on the bad leg after 25 freaking minutes. Seriously, this has gone nearly half an hour now.

Anderson is covered in glitter from Badd. He deserves better than this. Sir William, Regal’s manager keeps losing and regaining his accent. That’s always amusing. They keep announcing the time remaining which doesn’t mesh with the time I have on the counter here. And with 10 seconds to go Anderson goes for a sunset flip and the manager throws the umbrella up there so Regal can grab it and holds it for the pin. That makes me hate this show in ways I never thought possible.

Rating: D. I sat through 30 minutes for that? Seriously, they made this 30 minutes long??? Was everyone injured or something? Steamboat is in a suit and he couldn’t have had a 5 minute match or something to cut about ten off of this? That’s freaking DUMB man. This went 27 minutes. That’s just unforgivable.

We get a quick recap of Jack and Payne vs. the Nasties. The Nastys lost a non title match. That’s all there is to it.

Tag Titles: Cactus Jack/Maxx Payne vs. Nasty Boys

Naturally we get the big match intros which mean nothing here. Payne was annoying and not that good. Jack is of course epically awesome. Some very hot blonde is at ringside. I’m pretty sure Cactus and Payne are the faces here. They again try so hard to make someone, Payne in this case, a big deal and it still doesn’t work. The fans are dea here despite the company trying to push Cactus as a big deal.

Two to one says the champions keep their belts. Payne was one of those guys that never did anything but was supposed to be a big deal anyway. He’s more commonly known as Man Mountain Rock in case you didn’t know that one. Who thought this was a good matchup anyway? Cactus comes in for the hot tag to clean house and the match picks up a bit.

This is far less of a match and far more of a fight, which makes sense given that the second most talented guy in the match is freaking Brian Knobbs. HOKEY SMOKE Foley just got knocked from the apron to the exposed concrete and landed on his freaking HEAD. He’s got to have a concussion. He has to. So the idiot Sags kicks him in the head. Keep in mind, you can see them TONIGHT on Impact!

They have to bring up Lost in Cleveland after that. That’s a story we’ll cover someday. Think of the dumbest angle you’ve ever heard of. This is worse. This feels like one of those bad ECW matches that they have a bad name for putting on time and time again. The rematch would be far better but that’s not saying a lot. This thing needs to end, like NOW. Payne gets his armbar (yeah that’s his finisher) on Knobbs but Sags gets a guitar shot to him for the DQ to end it.

Rating: D. It’s an ok brawl but a terrible match. The Cactus bump was great but just another reason why Foley isn’t going to know his name about three years from now. Still though, this could have been far worse but it was boring stuff. Why have these guys try to wrestle?

Flair says he wants Vader but mentions Hogan also. Yeah he was locked in already. Steamboat is glad he’s the number one contender. Anderson shows up to offer his support as well.

They cut the lights for the cage to be lowered and Tony says hide your wallets since it’s dark and Heenan is in the building. That made me laugh.

Steve Austin/Rick Rude/Paul Orndorff vs. Sting/Dustin Rhodes/Brian Pillman

Austin is feuding with Rhodes, Rude is feuding with Sting and I don’t remember Orndorff vs. Pillman. Think of Thundercage as a weak Hell in a Cell but it’s the same idea, minus a top to it. It curves to the top though so it’s kind of like the red Terrordome that TNA uses. That’s good: a combination HIAC and Terrordome. Austin vs. Sting is an awesome matchup that would have made MILLIONS in 1998.

Apparently Austin is feuding with Pillman and Rhodes is having a small feud with Orndorff. That makes more sense I guess. They actually have to tag in and out. Why? It’s a freaking cage match for crying out loud. Pillman is busted just a tiny bit. Rude is the International Champion, which is a parody/replacement for the NWA Title. It would be merged with the WCW Title soon enough. Ok, upon further review, the cage doesn’t come up like Terrordome.

It just curves up a tiny bit. It’s a cheap version of HIAC. Go with that instead. Sting gets the hot tag to clean house, but that’s freaking stupid because it’s A CAGE MATCH! For one thing the star power is helping a lot here. Before this it felt like a bunch of midcard matches. Now we’re getting some big names. Ok just two but it’s better than nothing I guess. Dustin comes in and punches the tar out of Orndorff.

Rude comes in and counters the bulldog, Dustin’s finisher, to take back over. Rude would get hurt against Sting soon to end his career. Austin gets slammed into the cage to finally use the stupid thing. He’s US Champion here mind you, even though that means nothing at all. It finally breaks down and they all go in at once. Sting gorilla presses Brian and throws him at Austin for the pin. Sting gets beaten up by Rude afterwards. They were supposed to fight the next month but it didn’t happen.

Rating: C+. Better than anything else tonight but not by much. The star power helped a lot here. The match isn’t bad at all but it’s far from great. This was mainly about Sting vs. Rude and it came off pretty well. It’s not great but it’s a breath of air here so there we go.

We recap Flair vs. Vader. It’s the rematch but Flair was injured in a tag match at Clash of the Champions. The match was off but now it’s back on. This took 5 minutes to explain.

WCW World Title: Vader vs. Ric Flair

Big Boss Man is the referee remember. It doesn’t mean anything but he was signed recently so here he is. He would also fight Vader for the better part of a year. Vader’s attire is different as his chest is covered. I’d guess injury or something. Naturally this is a fight more than a match. Vader dominates but just like at Starrcade Flair keeps fighting back here and there. Boss Man (Heenan’s words, not mine) gets nailed and handcuffed to the cage as Race comes in.

Note: Race almost fell through one of the squares. Anderson and Steamboat come out and try for the door because they’re idiots. Steamboat smacks the lock with a chair but it won’t work. He clearly says son of a  gun, breaking my feeble world at the same time. Boss Man ribs the cuffs off the cage and hits Vader with a nightstick in the knee so Flair puts some leg lock on him.

Note that I didn’t say Figure Four as that’s not what it was. They blew the heck out of whatever it was and Boss Man calls for the bell without even looking at Vader. Flair keeps the title and gets Steamboat next month.

Rating: D. Somehow this got 11 minutes. Yeah, the main event got eleven minutes, or about what Taylor and DDP got. The insanity started about 6 minutes in. Even the Attitude Era wasn’t that bad. This was a total disaster and rushed on top of that. I’ve seen worse cage matches, but not that many of them. This would have been FAR better with about 5-7 more minutes. At least it would have felt more like a main event. But hey, Regal had armbars and chinlocks to use in that time I guess.

Overall Rating: D-. This was just awful all around. Nothing is interesting, nothing is any good, the main event is crap, the first 3 or 4 matches belong on Power Hour or something, and nothing wound up mattering anyway. This show was terrible but since it was never released on VHS, it’s not like most people would have access to it anyway. Maybe that was the point.

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