Impact Wrestling – September 5, 2013: An Unnecessary Show Setting Up An Unnecessary Show

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 5, 2013
Location: Wolstein Center, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Tonight is the second end of the Bound For Glory Series as we’re having a gauntlet match for twenty points so we can have one more match to jump someone into the final four. Also we have Bully Ray vs. Sting, which may or may not be for the title depending on whether you listen to what Hogan says or not. Let’s get to it.

Some of the participants in the BFG Series guarantee that they’ll win the gauntlet match tonight.

Here are the Aces and 8’s to open things up. Ray insists that they’re in total control and that he’s very pleased with his teammates. He hugs the members of the team and stops to tell Tito that the people are all jealous of him. Ray especially loves Anderson and gives him an awkward hug. Tonight the Aces are going to dominate everything.

Knux vs. Chris Sabin

Ray is at ringside and is already distracting Sabin. Sabin’s headlock is easily countered by the powerful Knux so Sabin wants a test of strength. Chris suckers him in and wisely goes after the knee with some dropkicks before wrapping it around the ropes for another dropkick to the knee. Knux easily slams Sabin down and stops Sabin cold with a big boot.

Sabin is catapulted throat first into the bottom rope for two and we hit the neck crank. A belly to back suplex puts Sabin down again and a middle rope legdrop gets two for Knux. Knux misses a running crotch attack into the ropes and hurts his knee again. Sabin hits a missile dropkick so Ray sends in the hammer to Knux, only to have Sabin intercept it and knock Knux silly for the DQ at 6:00.

Rating: C-. This was somewhat better than I was expecting but the ending better be part of a bigger angle. Sabin was world champion about three weeks ago and now he’s losing to Knux? It was a decent big man vs. little man match though this was a nice surprise given what I was expecting.

Post break Velvet Sky yells at Sabin for what he just did but Sabin shouts back at her that it wasn’t his idea. He calms down a bit and Velvet isn’t sure what to do.

Here’s Mickie James with something to say. She talks about being in Cleveland which is home to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but she’s brought her own trophy instead. She should have been at the VMA Awards and defends Miley Cyrus. ODB comes out to say this isn’t country music land and that she wants the Knockouts Title. Mickie says she’s the star and jumps ODB before talking a lot of trash. ODB fights back and rips off Mickie’s top in a nice visual.

Bound For Glory Series: Gauntlet Match

This is for 20 points and all twelve people in the Series are entered. Two people (Hernandez and Jay Bradley) will start and every so often (likely a minute or so) another person will come in. It’s over the top elimination until the final two have a regular match, winner gets twenty points. Before the fighting starts, Bradley talks about someone paying him to eliminate people and offers to split with Hernandez. SuperMex pounds him down and here’s Joseph Park at #3. The intervals are 90 seconds.

Bradley pounds Hernandez down and goes after ark, only to get caught by some shoulder blocks to give Park some momentum. Park is knocked to the apron but Bradley opts to go after SuperMex instead, earning the hard shoulder block that takes him down. Anderson is #4 and now the intervals are at two minutes. The entrances will be based on your standings in the points coming into the match.

Back from a break with AJ Styles and Samoa Joe now in as well but Park is gone. Kazarian comes in at #6 to no reaction. The crowd has been dead all night so far. Anderson goes up top and gets hit with an enziguri to the floor by Joe for an elimination. Kaz suplexes AJ down but AJ pops right back up and knocks Kaz down. Daniels is #8 and hopefully things pick up a bit. Bad Influence goes after AJ before turning their attention to Joe. A double clothesline misses the Samoan and he clotheslines both of them down to take over. Neither guy is eliminated so they put Hernandez out as Jeff Hardy is #9.

We come back from another break with Roode coming in to complete EGO and stomp on everyone in sight. Bradley tries to put AJ out but eliminates himself by mistake. AJ and Kaz go at it but Styles takes his head off with the dropkick. Aries is #11 and things pick up a little bit. Not that anything else happens but at least nothing is happening faster. Magnus is #12 to give us a final grouping of Magnus, Aries, Joe, Daniels, Roode, Kazarian, Styles and Hardy.

Bad Influence teams up to get rid of Joe and Roode dumps Hardy to get us down to six. Magnus dumps Kaz but gets thrown out by Daniels, leaving us with Roode, Daniels, AJ and Aries. Roode and Aries go at it, only to have AJ forearm Aries out. Roode misses a charge and goes out, leaving us with AJ vs. Daniels. AJ hits the flying forearm but can’t hook the Styles Clash. Instead it’s the Pele and a clothesline to put Daniels out, giving AJ the win, 20 points and a spot in the final four at 29:45.

Rating: C-. This falls into the category of long rather than good. Until the last few people in there was WAY too much standing around and it got boring fast. The other problem here is this wasn’t necessary at all since the same result could have been achieved by having AJ win via submission last week. It wasn’t terrible but thirty minutes was WAY too long for an obvious ending like AJ winning.

The final four are AJ, Magnus, Aries and Roode. AJ gets to pick his opponent for the semi-finals next week.

Bully goes off on Anderson for disappointing him and threatens to break a beer bottle over Anderson’s head.

Sting and Rampage give us some exposition to cover up Hogan botching the announcement of Sting vs. Ray tonight.

Gunner/James Storm vs. Garrett Bischoff/Wes Brisco

Non-title. The Aces and 8’s jump the champions on the ramp but Storm throws Garrett into the ring to start. Scratch that as they head back to the floor immediately and the brawling continues with the champions taking over. We finally get going with Gunner and Storm running over Garrett and Storm getting two off a bulldog. A knee drop gets the same but some cheating by Brisco puts Storm in trouble for the first time.

Storm comes right back with a Backstabber to Wes and kicks him away for the tag to Gunner. The Irish Curse gets two on Bischoff as everything breaks down. Gunner catapults Garrett into a DDT from Storm for two but Brisco takes James to the floor and sends him into the post. Brisco brings in a title belt but is instantly caught, allowing Bischoff to pull out a chain to knock Gunner out for the pin at 6:00.

Rating: D. The match was dull but I don’t have much of a problem with the ending. It’s not like there are a ton of teams challenging Gunner and Storm so why not these two lunkheads? I had forgotten who the tag champions were so any feud is better than nothing for them. The match was dull stuff though, much like the rest of the show so far.

AJ picks Austin Aries because Aries was the one guy he didn’t want to lose to. Aries doesn’t make predictions but says he’ll be in the title match at BFG. That leaves Roode vs. Magnus so Roode talks about how EGO’s plan is coming together. Magnus says he’s gotten here on his own with no one throwing appletinis in people’s faces. He has a family though and will go through anyone he has to in order to get to the world title. Good stuff from everyone here.

Bully Ray vs. Sting

Non-title, since Hulk Hogan can’t be trusted on a live mic after 30 years of talking. Ray reminds Sting that this is non-title because of Slammiversary which brings out Hulk himself. Ortiz is banned from ringside and this match is now No DQ. Sting hits a quick Stinger Splash before the bell and throws the champion to the floor as we take our last break.

Back with Sting working over Ray on the floor in the exact same positions as when we left. Sting hits him in the back with a chair before we head inside where Ray gets in chair shots of his own. Ray heads back outside where Taz hands him a box cutter to cut up the mat like he did at Slammiversary. Another chair shot keeps Sting down so Ray can rip up the padding to expose the wood under the mat.

Ray takes too long though and gets caught in a quick Deathlock, drawing out the Aces and the Mafia for the required brawl. They fight to the back as Ray tries the piledriver on the wood. Sting backdrops his way out but Ray blocks the Death Drop, sending Sting to the at. Ray misses a big boot and gets caught in the Scorpion. Anderson is still at ringside and pulls out the hammer but he won’t hand it to Ray, forcing Ray to tap out at 9:48.

Rating: C. This was your standard Sting brawl with a screwy ending. It wasn’t bad but we’ve seen the Mafia vs. the bikers so many times now that it’s almost impossible to get fired up for it anymore. Anderson screwing over Ray furthers the split which is long past due at this point.

Post match Anderson confirms what everyone already knew: he’s got the title shot against Ray next week.

Overall Rating: D+. The show wasn’t bad but it felt entirely unnecessary. Next week is the No Surrender special which doesn’t feel like it needs to exist either. The focus was firmly on the BFG Series and Aces and 8’s, but both of those stories have dragged on for so long that it’s hard to get interested in them anymore. This wasn’t a bad show but it went on forever and got boring quick.

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