Heroes of Wrestling: Dang Did I Remember This One Wrong

Heroes of Wrestling
Date: October 10, 1999
Location: Casino Magic, Bay St. Louis, Mississippi
Attendance: 2,300
Commentators: Randy Rosenbloom, Dutch Mantel

 

I’ve been meaning to get back to this one over the years as it can’t possibly be as bad as I remember it. I’m so glad that I’ve gotten done with the book as it allows me to get back to a show like this before I head out to Wrestlemania. As you probably know, this is something of an 80s reunion/nostalgia show with an infamous main event. Let’s get to it.

 

Just to really show the 80s feel of this we start with a montage before we get to the commentators, one of whom was supposed to be Gordon Solie but unfortunately he couldn’t make it.

 

We go backstage to see Bundy who says he’s the best super heavyweight of all time and Yoko shows up to argue. We get a pull apart and we hear Bundy shout that he’s prettier. Nice job of actually giving these matches a reason for happening.

 

The intro actually lists Gordon Solie as host, even though we’ve met the announcers and he’s not one of them. That’s nice of them to give him a credit despite him not doing anything.

 

This is also dedicated to Gorilla Monsoon, who passed away just four days before this aired. Again, very nice of them.

 

The voiceover guy says this could be the most powerful storm the Gulf Coast has ever seen. Very fitting for a show in that region.

 

We get a second highlight package to really fire up the audience. There’s actually a decent crowd there which isn’t bad. That’s very impressive for a promotion like this. Based on that you almost have to consider the live version a success.

We run over the card which looks passable. Given what they had to work with, this actually looks pretty good. It’s a really good idea to give these younger fans an education in what good wrestling used to be, especially during the Attitude Era when quality wrestling was barely anywhere to be found.

 

Samoan Swat Team vs. Marty Jannetty/Tommy Rogers

 

So we have a Rocker and a Fantastic. That’s one heck of a tag team combination and would have been a huge success had they been able to run with it. Even the set and ring look decent on top of the good card. The Swat Team are more commonly known as Tama from the Islanders and Samu from the Headshrinkers. That’s the good thing about the Samoans: you can mix the teams up the members and still have a good set of opponents.

 

The Samoans’ manager does a really solid Jim Cornette impression to really make this feel like the 80s. He even messes up the name of the town we’re in to draw some real heel heat. Marty is known as the Rocker Marty Jannetty and his partner is Fantastic Tommy Rogers. Points for some clever thinking They have pictures of them before they come out and you can see Shawn Michaels’ legs in Marty’s picture. WE’RE EVEN GETTING CAMEOS! This show is already better at nostalgia than most Old School Raws.

 

To really tie thing into modern times, Dutch Mantell is more commonly known as Zeb Colter today. Jannetty is in great shape for a guy that doesn’t get to wrestle all that much. Tama has grown a good bit and is wrestling an entirely different style than his old high flying days. I must say it’s actually working for me.

 

Appropriately enough Dutch is arguing about the First Ammendment after hearing the heel manager’s speech. He ties things back into the match by talking about how these men are heroes after their years of war in the ring. That’s a great way to make the fans care more about these guys.

 

The Fantastic Rockers take over early on with some high speed offense, including a dropkick from Tommy to stagger Tama. An armdrag puts Tama down as well and he comes up offering a handshake. I’m glad they’ve gotten rid of those stupid racial stereotypes in the more modern times. They’re horribly offensive otherwise.

 

Off to Marty as we get the always cool face coming in sans tag to set up the heels getting caught doing the same thing later. It’s always nice to see psychology brought in, which is something the tag teams of 1999 could have used a lesson in. Tama takes Marty down into a chinlock to try and take the crowd out things like a good heel is supposed to do as fast as he can.

 

The heels keep control with a kick to the back as Mantell keeps up the good heel work by using the rare national TV time to brag about his own career. Heenan and Ventura did the same thing at Wrestlemania when they had the chance and that’s exactly what guys like him are supposed to do.

 

Samoan dominance continues with both guys getting in their shots on Marty. We hit a few nerve holds which is one of the few good Samoan stereotypes that have stayed constant over the years. It fits with them using really basic offense and trying to slow down the fast paced guys and take away their advantage.

 

Tama sends Marty outside so Samu can get in a chair shot. Randy calls it unethical which is far better than Monsoon or Schiavone calling it cheating. Stop having so much emotion and be realistic about things. Breaking a rule is unethical and should be called as such. Back in and Tama misses a Vader Bomb, allowing the hot tag off to Rogers. He cleans up some of the house but gets caught by a double headbutt, setting up an awesome looking TKO from Tama for the pin.

 

Rating: C+. Really good choice for an opener here with a classic heel team against an 80s dream team. Dutch calls it a great win they can put on their resumes, which is absolutely right given how successful the Rockers and Fantastics were back in the day. It’s always cool to see Marty get to show off how good he was in the ring.

 

We get a clip of Sherri and George freaking Steele of all people walking off arm in arm. See, now THIS is the kind of fascinating stuff you get to see on shows like this where you take two people who are intriguing together. Sherri always jumped from guy to guy and team to team, but maybe she likes someone who is more, shall we say, aggressive with her.

 

Greg Valentine vs. George Steele

 

Valentine says he’s the son of the legend Johnny Valentine. That’s an old school idea which was done with guys like Shane Douglas as Paul Orndorff’s nephew and Bruno Sammartino had a “cousin” as well. He says he’ll leave with Sherri tonight whether she likes it or not. Seriously, this is some very basic but great heel stuff tonight and it’s making things a lot better than they have any right to be.

 

Sherri comes out with Steele as she’s already standing by her man. George looks exactly like he did over 20 years before this, as does Valentine. That’s quite the testament to their training regimens. Valentine hits the floor and goes after Sherri like any good heel going after the weaker person. Randy keeps things simple by saying it’s stalking. Sounds like a reason for Steele to stand up and stop Valentine if you ask me. George eats a turnbuckle and you can practically see Sherri’s eyebrows go up.

 

Steele bites Greg’s arm which is probably a bit more nutritious. I can’t believe I’m saying this but Sherri isn’t looking bad here. Back inside and George tries to take his shirt off but Valentine jumps him with the shirt over his head, almost like a cheating hockey player. Now we get to the climax of the match as Sherri turns on Steele and helps Valentine, playing up on George’s stupidity as he won’t be able to see her and will think it’s one of Valentine’s friends.

 

Back up and with the shirt off, Valentine pulls out a foreign object to get in a cheap shot and keep his control. We’re hitting all of the 80s high spots here and the crowd is reacting to it exactly as they should be. Dutch has gotten up to try and talk some sense into Sherri which might be going a bit too far. Do your job Dutch. The talk doesn’t even work as Sherri gets in a chair shot to give Valentine the pin.

 

Rating: D+. Not as good of a match here but they hit everything the needed to hit. Steele was a great choice of a sympathetic face, much like Kane with Tori over in the WWF around this time. You wanted to see him succeed and they did a great job of having everyone else involved screw with him and set up a rematch later on.

 

Hammer get in a cheap shot post match with the chair as well. The announcers talk of a rematch to let Steele get his girl back. You have to sell the ideas of a sequel.

 

Julio Fantastico says that he’s great and will beat 2 Cold Scorpio.

 

2 Cold Scorpio vs. Julio Fantastico

 

Julio is more commonly known as Julio Dinero in case you’ve heard of him in ECW or old school TNA. Scorpio I’m sure you’ve heard of. If not, imagine a Godfather/Luchador combination. It’s certainly memorable and different if nothing else. Having guys like him and Julio on the show is a good idea as it gives the annoying fans someone they’re more familiar with. Scorpio is carrying a replica WCW Title belt which he should have gotten a shot at back in the day. This match has the potential to steal the show.

 

Lou Albano comes out for commentary. That’s another name these young whippersnapper fans need to hear more from. If nothing else maybe a Mario flash mob will break out. He gives the announcers raises because he’s the Captain and thereby has the authority from Heroes of Wrestling management. He hypes up the organization and talks about how awesome this whole thing is. Amazingly enough, he’s been right so far.

 

Albano even throws in the following line that makes JR and his insane metaphors jealous. Regarding Randy Rosenbloom: “He’s a nice guy but he looks like he’s got the brain of a dehydrated baby if they put him in a pigeon pack and had him fly backwards.” Is there any doubt as to why this man was responsible for what became Wrestlemania? Apparently Lou looks like a pitbull in heat next to Dinero. This is making the already good show even better, hands down.

 

As for the match, Scorpio plays the role of the veteran well as he walks Dinero through the early part of the match. A lot of it is Scorpio doing his high spots while Dinero reacts to them, which is a good thing given that Dinero is an indy guy getting a shot on a bigger stage at this point. A slingshot cross body gets two on Julio as the fans are more into this than they were anything else so far. Uncultured swine they are.

 

Dinero isn’t bad at all actually and it was this match that got him a job with ECW. In other words, Heroes of Wrestling is helping the national economy and enhanced mainstream (ish) wrestling! Dinero takes a nice backdrop over the railing onto the floor. The brawl heads into the audience for some crowd participation in the vein of ECW. Even the announcers don’t know what’s going on as we hit the anarchy portion of the show.

 

Back in and Dinero takes over for the first time with a decent dropkick. Scorpio comes back with a series of armdrags into an armbar. He drops a knee on the chest and heads to the top, only to have Dinero go mega heel halfway through the match by sending the referee into the ropes to crotch Scorpio down.

 

They’re both on their feet again and 2 Cold nails a spinning kick to the side of the head followed by a middle rope flip legdrop ala the Harlem Hangover from Booker T. So why isn’t Scorpio in the Hall of Fame as well? A twisting moonsault legdrop is enough to get the pin on Dinero and the crowd freaks out at the high spot.

 

Rating: B. By FAR the best mach so far as this show is actually on a roll. This got somewhere close to a classic here if you can believe that. The anarchy spot in the middle made it feel even better as it was more of a fight than just a wrestling match. That’s not something you get a lot of the time in indy shows as a lot of the time it’s just wrestling instead of action.

 

Albano is the new commissioner of the organization and makes a nice speech to celebrate. He totally deserves it after that pigeon line.

 

We have 5 matches to go. I can’t take this.

 

We go to the back for another Bundy interview where he again says he’s going to beat Yokozuna. They’re hyping that match up very well.

 

Bushwhackers vs. Nikolai Volkoff/Iron Sheik

 

I’m calling them the Bushwhackers as they’re named Luke and Butch, formerly the Bushwhackers. You have to cover those legal issues I guess. The heels have an evil Russian manager as the time warp continues. That’s the whole point of the show though and they’re definitely keeping up the idea. The fans chant USA because they’re not smart enough to buy into the gimmick or realize that the good guys are from New Zealand. Pay attention people!

 

We get the Russian National Anthem of course and the Persian clubs which are as old school as possible. I miss little nostalgia things like that. The Persian clubs were good enough to get the Sheik the WWF Title so you can’t blame him for wanting to stick with the most successful bit of his entire career. The announcers even stop some of the stereotypes by calling them Iranian clubs. We hear about Hogan and Backlund to tie into the club gimmick even more.

 

This match holds a special bit of history for me as Luke licked my face once at a house show. The Bushwhackers were on Family Matters as a tag team once as well. Apparently they’ve won tag titles in 26 countries which is really rather impressive. The EVIL foreigners (as opposed to the nice ones) jump them early to start to further establish that they’re EVIL. Dutch explains the term short end of the stick which has some kind of scale according to him. It’s more interesting than puppies at least.

 

Sheik gets on the mic and says if they keep chanting USA then he’ll leave. You know what comes next as the fans FINALLY get something right. Actually scratch thaty. They don’t want to see a match they paid for? Also screw them for thinking they’re more important than the fans watching at home. Dutch gets in a good line about how Heroes will always stand and fight, just as Sheik comes back. Even as a villain he’s still a hero. Nice touch as this concept is going beyond face and heel. That got rave reviews with Russo’s shades of gray so why does this get such a bad reputation?

 

The heels stomp away at Luke before it’s off to Nikolai for a big Soviet slam. Back to Sheik for the camel clutch. I’ve always wondered if the arms are supposed to represent the humps. Can you store days’ worth of water in your arms? Butch finally makes the save and the Soviet manager is distraught. That’s better than a lot of managers who just look confused a lot of the time. Butch gets the tag and everything breaks down with the Russian bringing in a foreign object but hitting Sheik by mistake, giving Butch the easy pin.

 

Rating: C. Considering how long it had been since these guys had been regular wrestlers, this was rather impressive. Yeah it’s a formula tag match but sometimes that’s the best possible outcome. Sheik and Volkoff are former WWF World Tag Team Champions so a win over them still means something. WWE would certainly agree as they brought the Outlaws back fourteen years after they had last held the titles.

 

They plug a site with memorabilia from this show on it for the second time tonight. You’ve got to pay the bills.

 

We go to a pre taped promo from Tully Blanchard but Stan Lane jumps him and throws Tully into the trunk of a car. We get a rather awesome promo from Tully, talking about how he really doesn’t need to wrestle anymore but Stan has brought out the old fire in him one more time. That really worked better than I was expecting it to.

 

Tully Blanchard vs. Stan Lane

 

They miss an opportunity to bring up Ric Flair training Stan Lane. Speaking of Flair, he said the reason Steamboat can’t be considered the best ever was because he never wrestled as a heel. Tully was a long term heel so it’s impressive to see him play the face here. The guy really is talented enough to pull either character off. Lane on the other hand looks like Mr. Anderson and worked for ESPN after retiring.

 

The brawl is on almost immediately with Lane channeling his old Fabulous Ones days and playing a solid heel. He tries to hide in the corner but Tully is on him like a jungle cat. The fight heads out to the floor with Tully sending Lane into the steps and putting on a Figure Four on the concrete. That was a Horsemen staple and it’s nice to see him bringing it back here.

 

Back in and Lane gets in a cheap shot to the ribs to take over and yells about how Tully doesn’t have it anymore. Their conditioning really is impressive given that they haven’t been in the ring in a long time. Stan stomps away and gets two off a piledriver. The announcers are playing up how much of a hero Tully is. They have a point as it’s wrestling tradition to have a match rather than throw Stan in prison for assault or whatever the car trunk thing was earlier. In a quick finish, Stan loads up a belly to back suplex into a bridge but Tully gets his arm up at the last second for the pin.

 

Rating: D-. This is likely your match of the night. It was far from great or even good but it could have been far worse. Both guys kept things in the 80s but that’s what they’re best at so I can’t argue that. It was watchable and at seven minutes it’s the second shortest match of the night so that’s all fine and not very good but somehow that’s high praise for this show.

 

Jim Neidhart is with Bundy in the back and hypes up their matches later tonight.

 

One Man Gang vs. Abdullah the Butcher

 

They had to fit a hardcore match in somewhere. Abdullah’s manager is named Honest John Cheatum, which I believe is a regular name used for his handlers. The brawl is immediatley on and Butcher is sent into the buckle a few times. He comes back with right hands to the ribs and Gang is hunched over. We’re a minute in and Abdullah is bleeding.

 

Both guys head to the floor and Gang brings in his chain while the Butcher grabs his chair. The chain is whipped into the chair in a big banging sound as the fans are digging this more than I expected them to. We’re just waiting on the fork at this point. Butcher’s head is just gushing blood already, which probably raises the match up a bit.

 

Abdullah’s manager gets on commentary for no apparent reason. He’s from Paducah, Kentucky of all places and talks like a southern preacher. And believe me, as I’ve heard a lot of southern preachers. The guy can do a good voice if nothing else and that’s what you want from a mouthpiece for a guy like Abdullah. Cheatum says Abdullah is here to destroy the idols, and Gang is probably an idol in Africa given his past.

 

We get the fork shots from Abdullah and Gang is now matching his bleeding drop for drop. The Butcher drops his big elbow but Gang rolls to the floor like the veteran he is. Both guys get chairs and pound on each other until we get to a double countout. That’s very traditional for Abdullah.

 

The elbow hits, although you wouldn’t know it because the cameras were elsewhere. Have we seen a single finisher tonight??? We get a double countout. Really? Really? These guys were afraid to lay down here? REALLY??? The brawl goes on forever as they fix/clean the ring.

 

Rating: C-. Again, all things considered this was more than fine. Butcher had the same match for years but somehow still made them work. That’s the same thing you can say about Ric Flair and Butcher could arguably be considered the hardcore version of the Nature Boy. They both have the saggy chests if nothing else. Gang looked good as well, even having lost some weight after his old run in the WWF.

 

We see a clip from a poker game between Jimmy Snuka, Bob Orton Jr., Lou Albano and some guy we don’t know. Orton is apparently cheating like the villain he is. Tonight Bob keeps up his old partner Roddy Piper’s feud with Jimmy Snuka.

 

Bob Orton vs. Jimmy Snuka

 

They say Orton is from Kansas City, Kansas even though it’s been Missouri his whole career. A lot of wrestlers move after they retire. They say they’ve been excited for this match since hearing about the poker game earlier in the day. I can’t say I disagree. Albano is managing Snuka here and announces that he’s stepping down as Commissioner after tonight.

 

Snuka sends him to the apron but Orton changes places with him and grabs a suplex to bring Jimmy back in. They hit the match for a long technical sequence which is the highlight of the match so far. To really keep up the rudeness from the fans, they let us know they think Orton is gay. Heaven forbid they have to sit through an old school wrestling sequence like this one. Orton stays on the arm for a good long while, which should take some of the stings out of those Snuka chops.

 

After a good four to five minutes in armbars and wristlocks (the veterans know to mix it up instead of just doing the same things over and over), Jimmy fights up and hits some weakened chops. They hit the ropes but collide in a double clothesline to put both guys down. Jimmy goes up top but gets crotched, setting up Orton’s superplex finisher. Albano, the old villain that he is, hooks the ankle to send Bob crashing down, allowing Snuka to hit a top rope cross body for the pin.

 

Rating: B. Very nice technical match here for the most part with Albano helping his man win like any good manager would. Remember of course that when a face cheats it’s helping out but when a heel does it, it’s unethical and unacceptable according to Randy. The match was a nice change of pace from the brawling so far tonight and is probably going to be the match of the night.

 

And here it is. The moment that makes this show so infamous. Jake Roberts cuts a promo before his match with Neidhart, and he refuses to look at the camera. For the life of me I don’t get why so many people complain about this promo. Jake is legendary for his mind games and psychology. What is going to make an opponent more overconfident than thinking Jake is bombed?

 

Roberts says he cheats at cards, making me wonder if he coached Orton earlier. He keeps going about playing cards and gambling to hammer home the theme. No it doesn’t make sense, but compared to Hogan talking about dog paddling Donald Trump to safety and Ultimate Warrior LOADING THE SPACESHIP WITH THE ROCKET FUEL, this was Jake’s version of Hard Times.

 

Jake Roberts vs. Jim Neidhart

 

Now the person that I feel sorry for here is Anvil. He’s a 44 year old man that was a decent wrestler but he’s in way over his head here. He was in WCW about a year before this doing nothing at all and he hasn’t meant anything in wrestling since. He gets a phone call one day offering him to come to Mississippi to wrestle in front of a few thousand people for more or less a legends show.

 

Say for argument’s sake he’s getting a thousand dollars for a ten minute match. That’s not bad really, but people aren’t going to remember him. He gets his gear together and shows up ready to work for the pay promised. Based on who he’s fighting, it’s fairly safe to think that Anvil is going to lose to a DDT. The match is about to begin, and he gets this. Jake steals the show and is the most remembered thing about it. Fifteen years later Jake is going to the Hall of Fame and Neidhart was last seen in a cameo on Total Divas. It’s not hard to see why based on something like this.

 

Jake slowly to the ring, puts the snake down and walks back up the ramp. His boots aren’t even laced up. He’s so into playing to the crowd that he forgot to get ready for his match. That’s such great dedication to his craft. Again, Anvil is playing to the referee about the snake being there and is stretching a bit before the match. In other words, he’s doing exactly what he’s supposed to be doing like a professional should be doing. And now Jake goes back through the curtain for a bit. It worked for Edge during his retirement ceremony.

 

Anvil again is left to play to the crowd on his own and it’s easy to see why he never did anything without Bret on his side. To be fair to him though, he signed up to wrestle Jake Roberts, not do a one man show. Honestly though, I don’t even think Natalya would pay to see that. I don’t se why this is considered such a bad show. The fans are getting what they paid for, just like they did when Mike Tyson knocked guys out in forty seconds.

 

Roberts is back and we’re ready to go. Jake grabs a fan’s hands and rubs them on his chest. She doesn’t seem to mind so points to Jake for audience participation. The snake has gotten partially out of the bag, so Jake of course plays with it for a bit. It’s what he’s best known for so why not. He lays down on the mat to keep the mind games up as Anvil just walks around. Seriously Anvil, do something already.

 

Neidhart tries to work the arm and run the match, I think as the heel. To be fair you’re not going to get Jake booed most of the time. After a LONG sequence with Anvil being in control on the mat, Jake loses his boots and is now in his socks. He still looks about the same and is still doing better than Neidhart as far as being interesting.

 

Unfortunately Jake doesn’t get the chance to do the first shoeless DDT as Bundy comes out for no adequately explained reason. He breaks up the DDT to steal Jake’s big moment and gets flipped off by Roberts. Again, why is something like this criticized? Austin did it and is a millionaire as a result. We get a 2-1 beatdown until “The Former” Yokozuna come out. Yeah that’s what they call him. It turns into a tag match with Yoko and Jake vs. Neidhart and Bundy.

 

Jake Roberts/Yokozuna vs. Jim Neidhart/King Kong Bundy

 

The pairing makes sense as Jake/Yokozuna teamed up a few years prior to this at Wrestlemania XII. They say we have 650 of Yoko and Bundy and 450 and Neidhart at over 300. That’s quite the heavyweight match. Yoko is SO big here that you can’t help but look at him, which is exactly what you want when you’re flipping through the channels. Our other option is Jake and thankfully he’s picked to work the majority of the match.

 

Oh good night this is almost too much. I mean, you have two Hall of Famers against a few has beens. Why is this supposed to be considered a fair match? Yoko and Bundy, the advertised main event, interact for about 8 seconds if that. Somehow that’s better than most Raw main events from the year.

 

Eventually we hit the floor for no reason and Anvil hits Jake twice with a chair. I wonder if there were some extra hard shots there due to Anvil realizing what a waste he is in this match. Whenever he’s in control, this is a mess. We go back into the ring and Jake makes the clear tag but Bundy splashes him and pins him anyway. What a cheater. I can say with certainty that he’s a villain and not a Hero of Wrestling.

 

Rating: C+. Yeah the match is ripped on but I don’t get why. You have four known names who have never worked together before and are fighting for no apparent reason. It’s not fair to blame the wrestlers in that case and for the most part, the stuff we got here worked quite well.

 

Bundy’s manager appears after the match and takes a beating for Bundy’s sake. Jake and Yoko beat up Bundy’s manager who didn’t appear until the end. The fans chant DDT and Yoko says give it to him but Jake won’t do it after the match. Points to Jake for not wanting to be extra violent to a guy that can’t defend himself. Yoko, the jerk that he is, gives the manager a Samoan drop instead. Jake puts the snake on him and it just ends without anything other than that. What horrible commentary.

 

Overall Rating: B+. Seriously how could you think this show was bad? It cost $20 and ran over two and a half hours with a bunch of Hall of Famers on the card. I’m not sure what more you can ask for and the ending was straight out of the times. Russo added a bunch of stuff to the main event all the time and is called a genius for it, so why not do the same thing here?

 

I really did like this show a lot better the second time and it’s nowhere near as bad as I remember it being. Since I’m pretty sure most people don’t read this deep into the explanations, I’ll go ahead and say this review has been my April Fool’s joke here before continuing to ramble on about how great this show was and trying to come up with nonsense to say it was great. Stuff like the matches and promos weren’t all that bad and all that jazz.

 

Again, this only cost $20. Considering the limited stories they were allowed to tell and how fast things had to be set up, this is better than almost all WCW shows from this year and better than a lot of the WWF shows as well. I won’t even get into it being better than the ECW shows because I’ll just get yelled at as a result. This really was a better show than I remembered and I’m stunned as a result.

 

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