Smackdown – June 13, 2014: Blink And You’ll Miss Most Of It

It’s the day of bad luck but things haven’t been that bad in WWE as of late. The big story coming out of Monday is Daniel Bryan being stripped of the WWE Title due to his neck injury, meaning the ladder match at Money in the Bank is now for the title. Allegedly there’s going to be a second ladder match announced for the traditional briefcase, but if they don’t announce something by Monday I can’t picture it happening. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of HHH and Stephanie stripping Bryan of the title before announcing the ladder match for the title.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Shield to open things up. Ambrose says it’s clear that the Authority is trying to stack the deck against them. Well listen up kiddo: they’re flipping the table over and coming for HHH’s throat. As for his former business partner Seth Rollins, his business will be shut down for good. Reigns says Orton better enjoy his vacation because after Roman gets his hands on him, Orton will be on a permanent vacation. Maybe one of them will be the next WWE Champion.

HHH pops up on screen and says there are only a handful of spots in the ladder match and he’s only got one slot available. Therefore, he flips a coin and it’s Ambrose getting a qualifying match later tonight. His opponent: Bray Wyatt. Also, the Wyatts and Reigns will be banned from ringside, and Ambrose is banned from ringside for the next match.

Roman Reigns vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title. Roman takes him into the corner to start and gets two off a floatover suplex. Barrett fights back with some forearms but gets sent to the floor with a big clothesline as we take a break. Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock but missing a charge into the corner, allowing Barrett to hammer away even more. Reigns fights out of another chinlock and hits a Samoan drop to get a breather. Some clotheslines set up the running apron dropkick and Barrett is in trouble. The Superman Punch connects but 3MB breaks up the spear for the DQ at 8:25.

Rating: C. The match was pretty much exactly what it was supposed to be and the ending makes perfect sense. It’s also going to lead to a fitting final night for Mahal and McIntyre as they’re about to be destroyed by Reigns. Also, see how easy it is to protect a champion and avoid an unnecessary loss? Why can’t they do that more often?

Mahal is thrown over the table, McIntyre is speared and Slater is speared out of the air so Reigns can stand tall.

Erick Rowan vs. Jey Uso

This is the second round of singles matches after Jimmy beat Harper on Main Event. Rowan charges to start but is quickly sent to the floor for the big dive. Back in and Jey avoids a splash and hammers away but is easily thrown off the middle rope. A modified side slam (basically a Rock Bottom with the arm around Jey’s waist) gets the pin for Rowan out of nowhere at 1:40.

Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth

Bo dances to Truth’s music for a funny visual. Truth does the pelvic thrust to start and Bo isn’t sure what to make of it. Bo gets thrown down again and is a bit flustered for the first time. He nails a right hand and defends it by saying Truth attacked him. Some knees to the face get two for Bo and it’s off to a cravate. Truth makes a quick comeback with the gordbuster for two but Bo avoids the ax kick. The Bodog makes Bo 7-0 at 2:57, which the announcers treat as something that matters.

Cesaro and Heyman say that Cesaro will be fighting tonight and win by technical knockout when the referee has to stop the match.

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Non-title. Cesaro takes him into the corner to start but Sheamus fights back with right hands of his own. A kick to the face staggers Sheamus and Cesaro keeps pounding away in the corner. Sheamus blocks a suplex into one of his own though and the Irishman takes over. More big right hands have Sheamus in trouble but he gets belly to backed to change momentum again. Sheamus nails a Cactus Clothesline and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro nailing another knee to the head, only to be sent to the apron for the ten forearms. He’s able to fight out though, so Sheamus just hits him in the face to send it back to the floor. That’s fine with Cesaro as he pulls Sheamus off the apron and down onto the floor. Back in again and Cesaro hits some double stomps for two before bending Sheamus’ back around the ropes. More right hands have Sheamus in trouble but he says bring it on. Cesoar keeps hammering but gets sent back out to the floor.

Back in again and Sheamus hits his running knee lift to set up the ten forearms and the Irish Curse for two. White Noise is countered into Swiss Death for two but Sheamus still says bring it on. Cesaro hits him with every strike he can, only to get ax handled to the face and caught by the rolling fireman’s carry. Cesaro grabs the ropes to avoid the powerslam and counters into a small package with the tights for the pin at 14:40. That’s the same finish (minus the tights) from Payback.

Rating: B-. This was the usual good match between these two but I’m getting a bit tired of seeing them together. I do like the finish carrying over from the last match for the sake of continuity and the lack of a last second Brogue Kick is always a plus. It was entertaining too so it’s hard to really complain about this one.

After look back at the opening segment, Bray Wyatt talks about dreaming of glory as a child. He dreamed of a nice house on a hill with a white picket fence. He dreamed of happiness. Then he woke up and realized he was still stuck in this rotten world just like the rest of it. Abigail heard and told him that he would achieve everything he dreamed of and more. They will chant his name and bow down to him, and that’s the predicament he’s in now. Above that ladder lies his happy anding and his power. Unfortunately for Dean Ambrose, he stands in Bray’s way and will burn. Follow the buzzards.

On Main Event, Layla poured kitty litter and milk on Summer Rae to even the score from Monday.

Adam Rose vs. Fandango

Rose avoids a jump in the corner and gives Fandango a spank. The dancer takes him down and gets two off a suplex, only to have Rose roll away before Fandango can try the guillotine legdrop. Party Foul gets the pin at 1:45.

Post match Rose’s chicken gets in the ring and removes it’s beak to reveal Summer Rae. The catfight is on until Fandango saves his chick. Summer is actually working in this role.

Jack Swagger vs. Big E.

Swagger quickly sends Big E. out to the floor and takes his head off with a clothesline. Back in and Swagger pounds away but gets backdropped over the top and out to the floor. Big E. hits his clotheslines and the belly to belly followed by the Warrior Splash. Lana comes out for a distraction before the Big Ending, allowing Swagger to boot Big E.’s head off. Colter yells at Lana to get rid of her, but the Vader Bomb is countered with the Big Ending for the pin at 2:57. Colter yelling at Lana could lead to something, but so much for the ANGRY Swagger push.

Aksana vs. Alicia Fox

Aksana slaps her and nails some clotheslines to start before a snap suplex gets two. The release spinebuster gets two more but Fox comes back with her northern lights suplex. We hit the chinlock on Aksana followed by something like a snap Fameasser to a kneeling Aksana for the pin at 2:25.

The Raw ReBound looks at Rollins’ explanation.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Bray Wyatt vs. Dean Ambrose

It’s a brawl to start until Dean hits a cross body for two. He rakes Bray’s eyes across the ropes and hits his dropkick against the ropes to knock Bray outside. Ambrose dives over the top rope but gets caught in a release Rock Bottom against the apron. Back from a break with Bray working over the arm.

Ambrose escapes the suplex slam though and hits a DDT to get a breather. The bad arm is sent into the post though and Bray gets two off some headbutts. Off to a nerve hold but Bray misses the running backsplash. Dean goes to the apron but sends Bray into the buckle with one good arm. After fighting off a superplex attempt, Dean jumps into the release Rock Bottom but elbows his way out again.

Bray knocks him into the ropes but Dean bounces off the ropes with a clothesline for two. Ambrose says bring it on and charges at Wyatt in the corner. Bray goes outside but gets taken down by a running suicide dive. Back in and Dean hits his missile dropkick for two but the bulldog driver is easily broken up. Wyatt hits his running cross body but the suplex slam is countered into a small package. Now the bulldog driver connects but Seth Rollins is on the announcers’ table. Dean goes after him but Seth goes into the ring, sending Dean into Sister Abigail for the pin at 14:22.

Rating: B. This was getting good but it never hit that top level. I’m not wild on Bray wanting to be World Champion as he comes off more like a 1992 Cactus Jack, where he should only care about causing chaos rather than being champion. It’s an interesting idea though and Bray being champion wouldn’t be a stretch at this point.

Overall Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill Smackdown: the long matches were good enough, nothing was too terrible and there’s absolutely nothing that you need to see here at all. If you have nothing else to do, Smackdown isn’t the worst way to spend two hours, but you’d be better off throwing on an old show on the Network. That could be the same reaction to the show every week anymore.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Bad News Barrett via DQ when 3MB interfered
Erick Rowan b. Jey Uso – Side slam
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Bodog
Cesaro b. Sheamus – Small package
Adam Rose b. Fandango – Party Foul
Big E. b. Jack Swagger – Big Ending
Alicia Fox b. Aksana – Fameasser
Bray Wyatt b. Dean Ambrose – Sister Abigail

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