Impact Wrestling – August 7, 2014: It Happened

Impact Wrestling
Date: August 7, 2014
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

Tonight is the night. After all the weeks of build, all the hype and all the stories, tonight is when it finally happens. I won’t spoil it for you here because I’m not TNA, but tonight is when something very big takes place. Granted they showed it on Impact last week, but that’s been shown to work in drawing an audience in the past. Let’s get to it.

We get a parental advisory due to mature subject matter for tonight’s show.

Team 3D and Tommy Dreamer talk about how they’re going to war tonight and promise to put Dixie through a table tonight.

We get the IT HAPPENS trailer to open the show.

Bram vs. Abyss

Monster’s Ball. The bell rings and we’ve already got an ECW chant. They quickly head to the floor and the fans want tables. The announcers are telling the fans to call their friends for the Dixie stuff. Weapons are brought in and the fans want blood. Abyss wedges a chair between the ropes but takes some trashcans to the head to put him down.

Bram brings in a barbed wire board but gets sent into the corner for his efforts. He brings in the wrench but Abyss grates his crotch. Abyss sends him face first into the chair and it’s time for Janice and the tacks. Bram tries to fight back but gets chokeslammed onto the tacks, only to have Magnus offer a distraction. A spear puts Abyss through the barbed wire board and a Janice shot to the ribs gives Bram the pin at 8:12.

Rating: C+. Picture ANY Abyss Monster’s Ball match and this was about the same. I’m sick of seeing TNA try to rekindle the ECW fire though. That’s clearly what they were going for here and while it was entertaining, I’m totally over it. This was entertaining, but do something new instead of just rehashing everything.

Joe and Low Ki trade words over who will be X-Division Champion.

Team Dixie says they’re ready for the war tonight. Snitsky insists it isn’t his fault.

Here’s the Trio with a bunch of women. MVP rants about how he had issues when he was the boss and how everyone whined to him. As long as they control the World Title, they control this company. Lashley is going to be champion for years to come and he’s run through every hero here. First up there was Eric Young, then Jeff Hardy and last week it was Austin Aries. There’s no one left for him to beat.

This brings out Bobby Roode for a war of words between he and MVP, but Roode wants to talk to Lashley. Roode says that he’s a former World Champion and says MVP is going to manipulate Lashley every chance he gets. Lashley holds up the belt and the Trio attacks, with MVP nailing him with the crutch. Eric Young and Austin Aries come out for the save.

Gunner and Samuel Shaw are walking in the back when Anderson comes up. He wants to talk to Gunner but wants Shaw gone. Shaw leaves and Gunner says Anderson should trust Samuel. Anderson isn’t impressed.

Bully Ray won’t say who their fourth man for the eight man tag is.

Mr. Anderson/Samuel Shaw/Gunner vs. BroMans/DJZ

Anderson and Jesse get things going with the bigger star nailing a slam and elbows for two. Gunner comes in and hammers away for some two counts as I continue to wonder what happened to his big push. Gunner tries to tag out to Shaw but Anderson tags himself in due to mistrust. Anderson beats up the now legal Robbie but still won’t tag Shaw. Instead it’s Gunner again with the heels taking over via some good old fashioned eye rakes.

DJZ nails a missile dropkick and the triple teaming begins. A flapjack puts DJZ down but Anderson steals another tag from Shaw. Jesse and Ion save Robbie from a Mic Check and everything breaks down. Shaw finally comes in and destroys everything in sight, only to have Anderson get in an argument with him, allowing Robbie to roll Anderson up for the pin at 5:02.

Rating: D+. Standard six man storytelling here as the BroMans actually get a win for a change. I’m not sure where they’re going with Anderson/Gunner/Shaw but it seems like one of those stories where they’re either going very slowly or have no idea what their end goal is supposed to be.

Dixie has King Mo for protection tonight.

Gunner and Anderson argue about Shaw. Samuel comes in and breaks up the argument because it was his fault. This seems to appease Anderson a bit.

Ethan Carter III/Rhino/Rycklon Stephens/Gene Snitsky vs. Team 3D/Tommy Dreamer/???

This is a hardcore war but entrances are staggered every 90 seconds and the win can’t take place until the last man enters. It’s Carter vs. Dreamer to get things going and both have weapons. They quickly head outside with Dreamer’s knees being sent into the steps. Back in and Dreamer hits a quick suplex with a Singapore cane before driving in a bunch of right hands in the corner. Rhino comes in to make it 2-1 and nails Dreamer with the trashcan lid. A bad looking spinebuster sets up some cane shots but D-Von ties things up with a trashcan. D-Von takes over with a few shots of his own and we take a break.

Back with Snitsky giving the Carters an advantage (and looking to weigh about 400lbs) until Bully Ray runs out to even things up again and clean house. Ray looks up at Dixie and Mo as the ECW guys keep dominating. Stephens comes in to complete Team Dixie and clean house with a chair. The heels destroy everyone until the big mystery partner is Al Snow.

The fans want Head (and have a bunch of mannequin heads of course) as Al beats up everyone again. Ray nails a top rope cross body (didn’t look bad either) to take out the mercenaries. Spud tries to make a save but gets What’s Up from Head. Snow moonsaults onto every heel not named Rhino as this just keeps going. Not that it matters as 3D ends Rhino at 17:37.

Rating: D+. This was just WarGames minus the cage and a lot of the talent. There wasn’t much to see here and Al Snow was about as uninteresting of a partner as there could have been. Also, I didn’t need a second hardcore match in an hour but this show is an ECW tribute show anymore so you have to have it.

Bully tells Dixie that the clock is ticking but Dixie says King Mo will knock him out by the end of the night.

The Beautiful People don’t like Taryn. Love wants her title shot.

Ethan says his partner will protect Dixie tonight.

Bound For Glory is coming to Tokyo.

Here are the Beautiful People to complain about Gail and Taryn getting all the attention. Angelina says they’re hotter and that she’s a better wrestler, so why isn’t she getting all the accolades? Instead here’s Taryn to say that she’s never been champion but has Gail’s respect. Angelina says she’s better than both Taryn, Gail, and every other girl on the roster.

Velvet looks annoyed but here’s Gail to interrupt. She’s been given the choice of her opponent, so it’s going to be a fourway next week. Velvet is asked her opinion but Gail cuts her off and says the title match will determine the best next week. The Beautiful People cleans house but gets sent to the floor for their efforts.

James Storm tells Sanada to win the X-Division Title and bow to him.

Someone whose name starts with an H and ends with a K is coming.

We get a preview for next week: the Hardys vs. Team 3D and a fourway Knockouts match.

Bully promises to put Dixie through a table.

X-Division Title: Sanada vs. Low Ki vs. Samoa Joe

The title is vacant coming in. James Storm introduces Sanada in a nice touch, even though I still don’t know what he gets out of this. Joe hammers on Sanada in the corner to start before hitting the chop to his back and a kick to his face. Sanada avoids a knee drop and hits a quick basement dropkick before Low Ki comes back in for a slugout. Joe sends Ki out to the floor but Sanada breaks up a dive. Ki and Sanada head out to the floor for a brawl with Joe nailing both of them with a suicide elbow.

Back in and Joe does his powerbomb into the STF on Sanada. Ki makes a save and hits a cartwheel kick to Sanada’s face, finally giving us the big showdown. Joe gets the better of it but Ki counters the MuscleBuster into a dragon sleeper. Sanada breaks the hold but Ki counters the tiger suplex into a double stomp for two. Joe puts Ki in a cross armbreaker before slapping the Clutch on Sanada for the title at 6:51.

Rating: C+. I know a lot of people are going to love this match but it’s never been my style. I don’t care for the X-Division triple threat style most of the time and this was no better than a lot of the other stuff I see. The title isn’t going to mean much again in a few months, as is always the case for the X-Division.

King Mo is warming up as Dixie cheers him on.

Long video on Dixie vs. Bully. This is a really weird way of doing a segment as they’re acknowledging what’s coming but still treating it like it’s spontaneous.

Here’s all of Dixie’s team but she fires Stephens and Snitsky like the maniac she is. Cue Team 3D and Dreamer with a table but Dixie hides behind everyone she’s paid off. Ray promises to put Dixie through a table and Dreamer says Dixie is everything that’s wrong with this business. Mo nails Dreamer and the brawl is on with the ECW guys taking over. Suddenly Dixie is alone in the ring with 3D but runs when she’s about to take 3D.

Spud swears it’s never going to happen but the entire locker room comes out to throw Dixie to the wolves (Team 3D, not Richards/Edwards). D-Von loads her up (and grabs her in a rather personal spot) and Bully powerbombs Dixie off the middle rope through the table, in what I believe was Dixie’s first bump ever. We even get Bully’s old euphoric look and the announcers are WAY too happy to see this.

I’m not sure how I feel about this. I have no problem with a heel, male or female, taking a big bump to end a story. What I’m not wild on is how everything was announced in advance. This is going to cause some issues in the mainstream media given how violent it was, but that’s the nature of pro wrestling. It felt very scripted though and that’s not a good thing, but the ending was exactly what it should have been.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a case where the main angle is going to determine your taste in the show. It pays off the angle and hopefully keeps Dixie off TV for a VERY long time but it’s going to draw a lot of controversy. The wrestling was good enough for the most part, though I’m very sick of the ECW tribute stuff. Hopefully this blows it off but I want the energy to stay as it’s been awesome.

Results
Bram b. Abyss – Janice to the ribs
BroMans/DJZ b. Mr. Anderson/Gunner/Samuel Shaw – Rollup to Anderson
Team 3D/Tommy Dreamer/Al Snow b. Rycklon Stephens/Gene Snitsky/Ethan Carter III/Rhino – 3D to Rhino
Samoa Joe b. Low Ki and Sanada – Koquina Clutch to Sanada

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