Great American Bash 2000 (2015 Redo): The One Where A 14 Year Old Girl Mounts Vince Russo
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American Bash 2000
Date: June 11, 2000
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 7,031
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden, Scott Hudson
Cruiserweight Title: Lieutenant Loco vs. Disco Inferno
Post match Gunns has to give Pops mouth to mouth. In an amusing bit, he sees who is waking him up and passes out again.
The Mamalukes are ready for Kronik and argue over who is the Hardcore Champion.
If you order this show, you can get a Hulk Hogan RAFT. Yes as in an inflatable raft that you can use to float in the water. WHY DO I NOT HAVE ONE OF THOSE???
Kronik vs. Mamalukes
DDP says he has special motivation against Mike Awesome and he hopes Kimberly sticks her nose in this one.
Diamond Dallas Page vs. Mike Awesome
Now we get to my favorite part of a Russo show: the announcers trying to figure out what just happened. So here we have two options:
1. Bischoff talked to Kanyon in the hospital and convinced him to turn on Page, likely due to Page being a bigger star and getting Kanyon to believe that he deserved the spotlight.
2. Kanyon never was hurt and was convinced to be THROWN OFF THE TOP OF THE CAGE for a big swerve because just hitting Page with a chair was too complicated.
GI Bro vs. Shawn Stasiak
They head into the crowd with Shawn in full control and hitting Booker in the back for our first weapon shot nine minutes into this thing. We hit a sleeper on Booker as the fans think this is very boring. The hold may be boring, but at least it gives Tony a chance to screw up his timeline by saying Stasiak and Palumbo won the titles within the last week.
A minor trivia note: clips from the previous two matches and from a recent Thunder were used in a game on an episode of Whose Line Is It Anyway.
Shane Douglas vs. The Wall
US Title: Tank Abbott vs. Scott Steiner
US Title: Tank Abbott/Rick Steiner vs. Scott Steiner
Ric Flair and company arrives, an hour and twenty minutes into the show. He looks like Doc Brown Goes Hawaiian.
Regarding Horace, Hollywood says blood is thicker than New Blood.
Kidman vs. Hollywood Hogan
Bischoff is panicking because Goldberg might show up. The cops ensure him that perimeter is secure.
David and Russo say Ric is retired tonight.
The Flair Family comes to their seats.
Ric Flair vs. David Flair
Russo swears at the 14 year old (after shoving the 12 year old) and Ric thrusts his hips at him. A slam brings David off the top and the Figure Four makes David tap in two seconds, thereby proving the Russo is in fact more than 35 times tougher than David as he survived seventy seconds without tapping on Monday.
Sting vs. Vampiro
The announcers treat this all seriously (as they should) but then the replays ruin the whole thing by showing that the fire was out before Sting hit the crash pad.
WCW World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Kevin Nash
Disco makes up for it by taking out the referee at two and the GOLDBERG chants are getting even louder. Cat comes in and Nash fights off the Animals again, only to eat the Stroke for a delayed two. Jeff tries the guitar but gets chokeslammed for two as Cat has something in his eye.
Now the World Champion looks like a joke, Kevin Nash and Hulk Hogan are WAY too old to mean anything, Ric Flair is stuck in an eternal feud with a writer who already beat him in a big gimmick match and the most popular guy on the roster was just turned heel to give the heel stable a big gun. Oh and the World Champion is a lame duck waiting for Hogan to take the title again next month.
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