Monday Night Raw – June 13, 2016: Someone Give Me A Good Title For A Strong Go Home Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 13, 2016
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Money in the Bank so it’s hard to say how much will actually happen this week. In this case we’ll have the buildup to the actual ladder match but one of the participants will be crossing over to the main event as well as Dean Ambrose hosts a special Ambrose Asylum with Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We have a moment of silence for Orlando.

Here’s New Day to get things going. During their entrance we see a sign in the crowd reading “The guy behind me can’t see.” That actually made me groan and furthers my loathing of most wrestling fans. They talk about the upcoming four way but stop to make fun of Kofi for wearing the new Steph Curry shoes, which apparently look old. Kofi: “These shoes are hot on the streets!” Woods: “What streets? The streets of Greenwich, Connecticut?” Kofi: “Those are some mean streets.” They promise to keep the titles but here are Enzo and Big Cass to interrupt.

Cass says they’re going all in on Sunday and walking out with the titles. He implies that the unicorn horns are made for her pleasure and asks if Kofi is serious with the Jerry Seinfeld shoes. After New Day makes fun of the shoes as well, Cass wants to talk about Francesca. Woods: “That’s my girl.” Cass: “Well where was your girl last night?” Apparently she was with Enzo, who had his lips all over her like Satchmo.

Woods gets very serious and says he’s the only one who blows his girl. Kofi introduces the verbal joust of wits between New Day and Enzo/Big Cass but the Vaudevillains interrupt. English sings about how the new era but Anderson and Gallows cut them off. Gallows makes fun of the New Orleans Saints so Cass calls them S-A-W-F-T.

New Day/Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. The Club/Vaudevillains

This is joined in progress with Kofi working over Gotch before bringing in Big E. for the Unicorn Stampede. Cass throws in some elbows before Enzo tags himself in so Cass can throw him at Gotch. English shoves Gotch out of the way of a high cross body, only to have Gotch run Amore over. It’s time for Enzo to take a beating as all of the villains take a shot at him. English gets kicked out to the floor though and a kick to the chest is enough for the hot tag off to Cass as everything breaks down. Kofi dives on everyone and we take a break.

Back with Big E. in trouble but countering a sunset flip and dropping Gotch with an elbow to the jaw. Gallows gets in a clothesline though and Big E. is in trouble again. The Vaudevillains chop away before it’s off to Karl for a kick to the face in the corner. Big E. gets in a shot to the ribs though and it’s off to Kofi as things speed up again. A high cross body gets two on Anderson as Enzo and Gotch are sent out to the floor. English does the same to Cass, only to have Big E. LAUNCH him with a belly to belly. Gallows comes in off a blind tag and the Magic Killer puts Kingston away at 13:26.

Rating: C+. That break in the middle hurt this a lot as it felt like nothing more than a way to fill in time rather than something that the match actually needed. That being said, Kofi was on fire here, which is why he just had to take the pin. Big E. or Enzo were available, though they were smart to keep Cass looking strong as he’s possibly the biggest prospect in the whole match.

We look back at the debut of the Shield at Survivor Series 2012 to help set up the Ambrose Asylum later tonight.

Bob Backlund/Darren Young segment from Smackdown with Backlund telling him to save money, including only having one pair of clothes.

Shane and Stephanie are bickering over who should run Raw and/or Smackdown when Kane comes in to offer his services. He has a resume and a letter of recommendation from Undertaker so Stephanie lets Shane handle this one.

Zack Ryder is laughing with some random people about Apollo Crews knocking Sheamus down on Smackdown. Sheamus comes in and says he’ll beat Ryder up tonight, just like he’ll do to Crews on Sunday. Ryder says hi to Crews…..who isn’t there, allowing Ryder to run away like any former United States and Intercontinental Champion would do.

Clip of Shield’s face turn.

The Shining Stars brag about Puerto Rico’s water. How is this supposed to make money?

Titus O’Neil comes out for a match but Rusev jumps him from behind and beats him down on the stage. The referees have to come out and break the Accolade.

Clip of Shield breaking up. So to recap: they arrived, they turned face, and they split with nothing in between.

It’s time for the Ambrose Asylum with special guests Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins. Before they come out though, Ambrose says he feels like he’s just woken up from a coma because this Sunday feels like Wrestlemania. There are two major matches and we’re focusing on one of them here. Therefore, let’s bring out his first guest, the scum of the Earth, Seth Rollins.

Reigns is brought out as well and we get the big visual of the three of them standing there. Ambrose: “This is great huh?” He asks Rollins about the knee and Rollins is stunned that Ambrose hasn’t watched his special on the WWE Network (he should because it’s awesome). Dean thinks Seth’s face must be hurt because it’s killing him. Reigns on the other hand had a great time on Bourbon Street last night.

Dean wants Rollins to calm down and stop being a party pooper. After the party pooper chant dies off, Rollins lists off some fun moments they’ve had like Wrestlemania XXX, flying in on a helicopter to fight Undertaker and HELL NO in London and finding Dean unconscious next to a dumpster in…..what town was that? Seth brings up the matches against Evolution and we get a BLUETISTA chant.

Rollins gets to the Wrestlemania XXXI cash-in and violence starts boiling over. Dean breaks it up and says Reigns beat Ambrose for that title in the first place. Yeah Reigns accomplished a lot in Rollins’ absence but he’s never beaten Seth one on one. Rollins rants about how he’s going to get the title back on his own but Dean laughs the idea off. Reigns actually says Rollins is right because it’s going to be one on one Sunday and then they’ll call him the guy because he beat Seth. Dean asks the fans which one it’s going to be but offers a third option: he wins the Money in the Bank contract and cashes in on either of them.

The music plays and the brawl is on with Reigns throwing Dean away so he can beat Seth up himself. That earns Seth a Superman Punch but Dean gives Reigns Dirty Deeds because that’s what friends do to each other. Ambrose looks up at the briefcase and the fans seem to like the idea.

Back from a break and Stephanie makes Ambrose vs. Jericho for the main event. Over the weekend I made a comment about how Smackdown is worthless because the matches mean nothing and there’s a good chance that they’ll just repeat a match on Monday anyway and I had a feeling it would be this one because it’s the one that didn’t need to happen again.

Paige vs. Charlotte

Natalya and Becky Lynch are at ringside. Non-title and the second match of the show starts an hour and twenty one minutes in. Paige runs her over with a knee to start but gets small packaged for two. Charlotte yells at Natalya and walks into the Rampaige for the pin at 2:31. I’m not even going to bother getting mad about this.

Cesaro is about to talk about Money in the Bank when Sami Zayn comes in to give the real answers. Cesaro is ticked off and says Sami is acting like a child but Sami says Cesaro can’t talk down to him like this. Apparently they’re in the same match tonight so Cesaro says he’ll see him out there.

Charlotte yells at Dana for failing and implies that Dana is her assistant. Dana is of course mad but Charlotte says her payment is to be part of Charlotte’s legacy.

Sheamus vs. Zack Ryder

This is the second match in a row with no entrances, likely for the sake of more backstage stuff. Sheamus attacks early to start but gets caught by a quick dropkick and the Broski Boot. The Elbro gets two but the Rough Ryder is easily blocked. The Brogue Kick puts Ryder away at 1:53.

Sheamus beats him up even more until Crews runs out for the save.

We get a video of Kane winning Money in the Bank in 2010 and cashing in the same night.

Kevin Owens interrupts Kane and Shane’s talk but he wants to talk to Stephanie. Apparently Alberto Del Rio just arrived twenty minutes ago and should be taken out of the Money in the Bank match as a punishment. Del Rio, already in his gear, comes in to blame Owens for calling airport security to get him delayed for five hours. They start yelling in Spanish and French until Kane cuts them off with an idea. How about a tag match against the Lucha Dragons with the winners getting the spot in the ladder match? Shane likes the idea and makes the match.

Sami Zayn vs. Cesaro

Feeling out process to start with Cesaro nipping up out of a wristlock but getting armdragged right back down. A nice tilt-a-whirl backbreaker plants Sami for and Cesaro sends him into the post as we take a break. Back with Cesaro hitting a corner uppercut and stomping on Sami’s chest for two. A quick Michinoku Driver gets two for Sami but he takes too long going to the top, allowing Cesaro to power through the apron superplex for another near fall. Back up and the Blue Thunder Bomb gets two, followed by the sunset bomb for…..actually for three on Cesaro at 8:06.

Rating: C+. That’s one of the few booking ideas I’ve seen tonight that I really like. Sami (and a lot of other people) have those big moves that never win anything so it’s a really good idea to have one get a pin every now and then to make you believe that it could get another one later. The loss doesn’t hurt Cesaro either as none of these wins really mean anything heading into the big gimmick match.

It’s time for the contract signing between John Cena and AJ Styles as moderated by Michael Cole. Cena hypes up Money in the Bank as a show bigger than Wrestlemania with a match fifteen years in the making. For years, the WWE bosses had told AJ Styles that he didn’t belong here. That’s nonsense because from PWG to New Japan to Ring of Honor, AJ Styles has been the best everywhere he’s gone. Sidebar: Is there any real reason why they won’t say TNA? Ring of Honor is arguably bigger and New Japan is definitely bigger but TNA isn’t allowed? Unless there’s some legal reason, I see no logical justification for not saying it.

Anyway Cena tells Cole to leave because this is going to get rowdy. AJ comes out and says he’s turned Cena’s world upside down. Cena agrees that it’s been done but there’s something up his sleeve. There are two contracts here, one of which says John Cena vs. AJ Styles and the other which says John Cena vs. AJ Styles w/The Club. Cena would love to sign the first one so we can have one heck of a fight on Sunday but if they sign the second one, AJ will win on Sunday and then start complaining the very next night when he doesn’t get the same respect.

AJ thinks Cena is so confident because of all the things he’s won but Styles wants to know what would have happened if AJ had been here fifteen years ago. My guess is not much because he still would have been a nothing tag guy but I get his point. AJ says he would have been the one on the covers of magazines and in all the movies. Cena cuts him off and says he’s heard this before and AJ doesn’t get it because he has the chance to prove it on Sunday.

AJ can sign one contract and prove how great he is or sign the other one and be put on a bullet train back to Japan because that’s where he left his balls. AJ grabs a pen and looks at the contracts before signing the one on one version. Styles says after Sunday, Cena’s time is up. As usual, this was AWESOME stuff.

We see Randy Orton winning Money in the Bank in 2013 and cashing in on Daniel Bryan at Summerslam.

Kevin Owens/Alberto Del Rio vs. Lucha Dragons

The winners are in Money in the Bank. Del Rio beats on Kalisto to start before it’s off to Owens who isn’t happy with the way Alberto is acting, only to calm down at the threat of a DQ. Owens teases walking out but comes back in when Alberto is rolled up for two. Kevin and Alberto get in a shoving match and get dropkicked to the floor, setting up a double dive from the Dragons as we take a break.

Back with Kalisto eating a clothesline but Del Rio won’t tag out. Owens and Alberto get in another argument, allowing Kalisto to hit a quick Salida Del Sol to send Del Rio outside. Kevin throws his partner back in and it’s off to Sin Cara for the Swanton, only to have Owens breaks it up at two. The Pop Up Powerbomb ends Cara at 8:15.

Rating: C. I liked the idea of having something on the line here. Of course it wasn’t going to happen but it was nice to have a reason to care about the match. The Dragons are just so nothing these days and it’s sad to see the promise that Kalisto showed wasted as much as it has been.

Del Rio superkicks Owens post match.

Back from a break with Owens telling Stephanie that Sami Zayn is going to be on commentary for the main event. Stephanie is furious because that’s something so horrible so she makes Owens a commentator as well. Del Rio comes in and says he wants to be out there too so Stephanie makes him guest timekeeper.

Stephanie yells at Shane about his decisions so Shane makes Cesaro guest ring announcer. On another note, Kane isn’t getting the job running Smackdown. Kane comes in and asks if this is about electrocuting Shane’s testicles with a car batters. Shane tells Stephanie they’ll keep running Raw but he’ll run Smackdown on his own. This is getting old in a hurry and it’s only going to get worse.

Chris Jericho vs. Dean Ambrose

All of the other Money in the Bank participants are at ringside. Dean chops him down to start and scores with a quick suplex. Jericho is sent to the floor for a suicide dive before Dean knocks Owens’ headset off. Back in and Dean flips out of a Walls attempt but eats an enziguri. The corner dropkick puts Dean on the floor and it’s time for the announcers, timekeeper and ring announcer to stare at each other.

We come back from a break with Dean fighting out of a chinlock. Some clotheslines stun Jericho but he counters the top rope standing elbow drop into the Walls. Owens: “I taught him that!” Dean grabs the ropes but can’t get Dirty Deeds. Instead Jericho takes him down for two off the Lionsault, only to have Dean get up top for the elbow.

Byron asks how Kevin would handle not winning Sunday. Owens: “I would handle it the same way: I would come out here and slap your face.” Dean tries to put on the Walls but settles for a catapult out to the apron. Jericho runs to the top but dives into a kick, only to have the Codebreaker countered into Dirty Deeds for the pin at 11:58.

Rating: C. This would be the standard reversal of the match we saw on Smackdown because that’s what Smackdown is for: a dry run for the following Raw without any mention of the first match. It doesn’t help that these two have fought WAY too many times and it’s getting less and less interesting every single time.

Everyone brawls after the match with Owens bringing in a ladder, only to have Sami flip dive off the top onto the pile of people. Jericho wasn’t in that group though and goes up the ladder to pull down the briefcase to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling (and lack thereof at times) brings down what was an otherwise very strong show with two excellent talking segments. I’m more invested in the pay per view than I was coming in and that’s the point of a go home show. The Cena vs. AJ stuff was excellent as Cena is still the best hard seller in the business and the Shield segment made things feel more personal, especially with Dean at the end to add some flavor. As has been the case so many times, if this was a two hour show, it would have been one of the best in a long time. As it is though, it’s still good enough.

Results

The Club/Vaudevillains b. New Day/Enzo Amore/Big Cass – Magic Killer to Kingston

Paige b. Charlotte – Rampaige

Sheamus b. Zack Ryder – Brogue Kick

Sami Zayn b. Cesaro – Sunset Bomb

Kevin Owens/Alberto Del Rio b. Lucha Dragons – Pop Up Powerbomb to Cara

Dean Ambrose b. Chris Jericho – Dirty Deeds

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