Impact Wrestling – July 12, 2016: I Needed A Break

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 12, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s Destination X and that means title for title with World Champion Lashley facing X-Division Champion Eddie Edwards in a winner take all match. Mike Bennett has promised to ruin the whole thing though and there’s also the possibility that Maria Kanellis will do something to further her issues with Dixie Carter. Let’s get to it.

We open with Final Deletion clips, including Jeff Hardy waking up. Matt goes down to the boat and names it Scarsguard as a thank you for saving him last week. Matt takes it out into the water with a bag containing Jeff’s remnants but the drone comes out, carrying the shirt Jeff was wearing to complete the package. Naturally this is continuing.

Braxton Sutter vs. DJZ vs. Rockstar Spud vs. Trevor Lee vs. Andrew Everett vs. Mandrews

Ladder match for the #1 contendership to the X-Division Title because it’s time for the usual suspects to be thrown into a mess of a match so they don’t have to develop in the slightest. Mandrews dives onto the Helms Dynasty as they come to the ring with DJZ doing the same thing for a big crash. DJZ stops Mandrews from grabbing the X but Sutter stops DJZ just as quickly.

Trevor goes for the belt on two ladders but they’re pulled away, forcing him into the splits for a new idea. Spud takes down a bunch of people with a chair but gets kicked in the head. A Sutter powerbomb knocks Lee silly, only to have Spud take him down with a belt to the back. We get the traditional Shane Helms interference to stop DJZ going for the belt, only to have DJZ shove the ladder over with Everett go crashing into the pile. DJZ pulls down the X to win at 5:55.

Rating: C. More of the same from the X-Division with a bunch of bodies flying around and no characters for the most part. It’s basically the second time they’ve done this same match in two weeks after the Ultimate X match last week. Is it too much to ask to go a month or two between “go grab something” matches?

DJZ is proud of his win and promises to go win the title when Mike Bennett jumps him from behind.

Ethan Carter III is ready to fight Drew Galloway because talking is over.

Dixie Carter says they’re moving back “home” to Thursday nights next week with the start of the Bound For Glory Playoffs.

Eddie Edwards and Lashley are in the ring for a face to face showdown. Lashley says the World Title is the heart of Impact Wrestling and he’s the top of the food chain. All Eddie has done is tick him off but Edwards says he’s going to walk out World Champion. Lashley says this isn’t a movie (True. That would be Final Deletion.) and the underdog doesn’t win. The X-Division Title is real life but Lashley beats him down when the Wolves Nation is mentioned for the first time (Good. That name has always sounded stupid.). The spear puts Eddie down and Lashley gets a chair, only to have Davey Richards return for the save.

Abyss has to choke Crazy Steve to calm him down as Steve is losing his mind about Rosemary kissing Bram last week. Tonight Abyss can take care of Bram and everything will be beautiful again.

Back at Matt’s house, he’s invited guests to his private movie theater to watch the Final Deletion. In another room, Reby pulls a book from the wall to open the door to Maxill’s room. She picks up the baby and drops down a fireman’s pole into the theater as we see the family and guests watch last week’s events. More is promised, which means I’ll get another week of being called stupid for not hailing this as the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.

Abyss vs. Bram

Abyss hits some right hands to the ribs in the corner to start before sending him out to the floor for a crash. Steve pulls Bram’s hair out but Bram comes back with some right hands of his own. A chokeslam cuts off a comeback but here’s Rosemary to check on Bram. The distraction lets Bram roll Abyss up for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: D. It was about time to screw with the Decay as the Wolves are apparently back and it’s time to put the titles on them again because they’re the most amazing team in the history of ever and we don’t want Decay getting any more traction than they already have. That’s TNA’s take on things: don’t let anything but the old standard get too big because that might let them go somewhere and that just isn’t how TNA wants things go work. The match was nothing of course.

Knockouts Title: Jade vs. Marti Bell vs. Gail Kim vs. Sienna

Is this the entire division at the moment? Sienna is defending and Gail jumps her on the ramp because this is basically two singles matches at once. Gail is discarded (Don’t worry. She’ll be back to save the division soon enough.) so Sienna can stomp on Marti as Josh promises MORE from Matt’s house at dinner last night.

Marti gets two on Sienna with Gail making the save, followed by a quick Tower of Doom. Jade and Gail dive onto the heels before slugging it out in the ring. Gail avoids a Pele and gets two off a backsplash. All four are back in now with Marti hitting a Pedigree on Jade. Eat Defeat drops Marti but Sienna Pounces Gail to retain at 5:10.

Rating: D. Another four way with no characters, the same moves over and over and Gail Kim being involved because screw “the division”, it’s all about promoting her. We’re just waiting to see her enshrined at this point and probably winning the title back at Bound For Glory so everything can be right.

Matt and his family had dinner and it’s all bizarre and weird and Matt speaks Spanish and it’s not funny or interesting and I don’t care if I’m stupid for not getting it. Next.

Lashley wants Davey Richards at ringside for the title match tonight.

We see the end of the Final Deletion. Again.

Here are Matt and Reby to brag about their win last week. Matt has DELETED Jeff, who Reby brings out and shouts OBSOLETE over and over. Apparently Matt wants to keep Jeff around and bleed every dollar out of him by making him his mule. DELETE DELETE DELETE. Oh yeah this is continuing until Bound For Glory and probably beyond.

DJZ wants Mike Bennett in the ring tonight.

Mike Bennett vs. DJZ

Mike runs him over to start but DJZ fires off right hands. Those go nowhere because he’s a lowly X-Division wrestler and can’t fight a heavyweight. A spinebuster gets two and we hit a chinlock for a few moments. DJZ fights up and headscissors him out to the floor for a flip dive. That’s enough for Bennett as he tries to walk up the ramp, only to be cut off by the X-Division. The distraction lets DJZ grab a rollup for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: D+. There’s your token pin because the X-Division actually matters tonight. The pinfall is nice but I have no reason to believe this is actually going to stick. You know, like it never actually does in TNA. Nothing to see here but that’s almost always the case in TNA around Destination X time.

Post match Bennett yells about wanting to ruin Destination X because that win really didn’t mean much. He promises to burn this place to the ground.

Drew Galloway wants to fight.

Bennett is on the phone and tells someone to get here tonight so they can burn it to the ground.

Here’s Galloway to call Ethan out for a fight, as in not a match. Ethan is ready go to as well and it’s on in a hurry. Drew takes it to the floor but gets suplexed. They trade some chops and Ethan pelts him with a chair. They fight backstage with Ethan getting the better of it until a bunch of people break it up.

Davey tapes up Eddie’s hands for the main event.

X-Division Title/TNA World Title: Eddie Edwards vs. Lashley

Both titles are on the line. Lashley shoves him around to start but his suplex is countered into a sleeper. That goes as far as your average sleeper is going to take you so Lashley sends him outside for a suplex on the ramp. Eddie is sent into the steps and we take a break.

Back with Lashley beating Eddie in the corner and choking on the mat until Eddie fights up with a tornado DDT. A low bridge sends Lashley to the floor and there are three straight suicide dives. Back in and Eddie gets two off a sitout spinebuster before kicking Lashley in the eye.

Eddie tries the Boston Knee Party but gets caught in a powerslam with the referee getting bumped. Lashley grabs a chair so here’s Davey for the superkick/brainbuster combo and a near fall. Cue Mike Bennett but MOOSE makes his debut (complete with the Moose name and cool entrance music) to lay out Davey. We’ll call it a no contest at about 15:00.

Rating: B-. As usual, TNA is mostly fine between the bells and only lacks in the story departments. The match was good with a power vs. speed formula that works almost every single time. Eddie is more than good enough in the ring to fight off a monster like Lashley and the ending is intriguing stuff with a big name debuting. Good stuff here and a worthy main event.

Post match Bennett hits Lashley low, allowing Moose to take Lashley out as well.

And now, here’s Dixie Carter to end the show. The fans deserve a winner so there’s a rematch inside Six Sides of Steel with both titles on the line. To recap: a major name just debuted and we wrap it up with Dixie Carter.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a very, very tricky one to grade as I actually had to stop watching for about forty minutes before I went insane. The first half of this show was every single problem TNA had rolled into a single show:

1. X-Division/Knockouts clearly having no effort put in. It’s “here’s the entire division in one match with no characters or story”, just like it’s been for months if not years. The wrestling itself was fine (or as fine as you’re going to get in two matches combining to go ten minutes) but the lack of character development is killing them more and more every single time. There’s nothing different about these people and it shows when they’re thrown out there in one big mess of a match almost every time.

2. Dixie with her “we’re going home” speech. I can’t stand her more and more every time I see her.

3. Matt Hardy all over the show. We’ve seen that clip so many times and it’s being driven into the ground. The feud is clearly continuing and it’s going to be more of the same. If you like it then great, but if you don’t like it, prepare to be stuck sitting there all night long because it’s not going away.

4. TNA fans are going to spend the next week explaining to me about how amazing this was and how stupid I am for disagreeing.

Now that being said, the second half was MUCH better with the wrestling and stories being improvements with characters doing things that make sense for them. The main event was a perfectly acceptable use of the last segment with a new name debuting and a good match building towards it. That’s all well and good, but TNA just has so much bad that drags the good down and there’s almost nothing in the middle. It’s either horrible or good and that gets old in a hurry.

Results

DJZ b. Braxton Sutter, Rockstar Spud, Trevor Lee, Andrew Everett and Mandrews – DJZ pulled down the X

Bram b. Abyss – Rollup

Sienna b. Gail Kim, Jade and Marti Bell – Pounce to Kim

DJZ b. Mike Bennett – Rollup

Lashley vs. Eddie Edwards went to a no contest when Moose interfered

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