Impact Wrestling – December 15, 2016 (Total Nonstop Deletion): I Knew They Wouldn’t Come

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Date: December 15, 2016
Location: Hardy Compound, Cameron, North Carolina
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jeremy Borash

No drones were harmed in the making of this presentation.

We go to Gilbert Corsey (former OVW interviewer) who says there is seismic activity in Cameron, North Carolina.

At the scene of the Hardy volcano, Itchweeed (yes I spelled that right) runs up to the volcano with a weed whacker and shouts a lot of unintelligible words.

King Maxel vs. Rockstar Spud

Maxel drives to the ring in a mini Mercedes because of course he does. The bell rings, Benjamin tases Spud and Maxel gets the pin in 19 seconds. Cool moment, though Kevin Owens basically did the same thing in PWG a few years back.

Disco Inferno is watching from the back and asks if anyone wants to play some poker. It should be noted that Inferno was once arrested for involvement in an illegal poker game.

Corsey is taking bets on the match.

Sienna names herself #1 contender for the Knockouts Title and is willing to put that spot up against anyone or anything. Then the following happens.

Sienna vs. Vanguard I

Sienna vs. ODB

ODB rubs Vanguard I on her chest.

The Helms Dynasty wants to fight but Matt has a pre-mo-nition. Tonight, we will see an appalling reincarnation.

Itchweed vs. Chet Sterling

We get a flashback to Matt talking to a giraffe named George Washington and Jeff boxing a kangaroo named Smoking Joe.

TNA World Title: Lashley vs. Eddie Edwards

Eddie saves himself from a superplex and scores with a missile dropkick. The Shining Wizard gets two but Lashley gets in the Dominator for the same. Back to the floor with a powerbomb sending Eddie into the crowd. Looked cool but not much pain involved. Lashley picks things up a bit and spears Eddie through the wall as we take a second break.

Tag Team Titles: Tag Team Apocalypto

Hardys, Helms Dynasty, Rock N Roll Express, Decay

Back to Lashley choking Edwards with a cord of some kind as Morton is still stuck on the crane, demanding to be let down. Road Warrior Animal of all people is here, asking how Morton got stuck up there. Decay finds James Storm in a mask but multiple other DCC members show up. One of them takes off his mask and Storm has no idea who it is. Whoever it is gets knocked out with Abyss getting the pin, which eliminates the entire DCC. Storm gets in a superkick for good measure. Steve wants to go add to this pile of bones and we take another break.

Results

King Maxel b. Rockstar Spud – Spud was shocked with a taser

Sienna b. ODB – Silencer

Itchweeed b. Chet Sterling – Pesticide Elbow

Eddie Edwards vs. Lashley went to a no contest

The Hardys won Tag Team Apocalypto last eliminating Decay

 

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