Main Event – December 16, 2016: Making My Christmas Merry
Main Event
Date: December 15, 2016
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, Corey Graves
The dates on these shows continue to be all over the place as you hear about the show being on Friday but it’s already available, making me wonder why I care about these things in the first place. It’s been firmly established that this show has been taken over by the unstoppable force that is Darren Young vs. Jinder Mahal. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
SWEET! IT’S ANOTHER SPECIAL EPISODE! I’m assuming nothing was taped due to 205 Live being moved to Monday this week as Tuesday was Tribute to the Troops.
We’ll start with a match from Raw.
TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick
An early wristlock doesn’t get Kendrick very far and he has to bail from the kneebar. The Wrecking Ball dropkick knocks Brian outside and we take a break. Back with Perkins hitting a jumping spin kick to the head and a springboard missile dropkick for two. The Captain’s Hook is countered into the kneebar so Kendrick dives over to the ropes. Back up and Sliced Bread #2 gives Kendrick the pin at 8:24.
Rating: C-. So flash back to any time these two have fought in the last few months and update the details as necessary. This wasn’t interesting because neither of the wrestlers are interesting. The triple threat has some potential but for the life of me I never need to see these two fight again.
Our first flashback shows Kane and Daniel Bryan exchanging presents. Bryan gets a Slammy and Kane gets…..a puppy! Kane: “Thanks. I’m starving!” Bryan: “NO! NO! NO!” I miss these two together.
And now, Ebenezer Piper. Oh this could be glorious. Jacob Marley comes to visit and tells him that three guests will be visiting the rotten Piper tonight. First up is the Ghost of Christmas Past and Piper makes jokes about his shoes. This goes nowhere so the Ghost of Christmas Present shows Piper how bad the Cratchits have things this year. Piper won’t give up his Scotch tape (it doesn’t make much more sense in context) so the Ghost leaves.
Finally we have the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come (Piper: “You don’t shave under your arms do you?”) and of course he shows Piper his grave. Roddy throws him out and that’s it. This really wasn’t funny and it’s just the standard Christmas Carol with Piper doing some of his standard jokes.
Long video on Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte.
We go back to December 2001 with the Rock in the ring talking about Test. Rock likes Test so much that he’s going to sing a little rendition of the 12 Days of Christmas. He lists off some things that Test is going to go through, including five seconds of the people chanting the Rock’s name. This was really fast but I’d completely buy Rock doing this off the cuff.
Back in 2012, Alberto Del Rio hit Santa with his car. This set up Cena vs. Del Rio in a Miracle on 34th Street Fight and I think you can get the idea. During the match, Santa took a turn for the worse but, with his heart rate monitor to the beat of Jingle Bells, he came out to help Cena get the win. It turned out that Santa had a sock in his belt and a certain Mandible Claw was used.
Back in 1990, Bobby Heenan gave Gorilla Monsoon a banana. Heenan got some tools, which he used to break the janitor’s present. It turns out he got things a bit backwards though and broke his own present: a Rolex. Cue the wah wah wah music.
In 1997, a kid told Santa he wasn’t real so Steve Austin came out and Stunned the imposter for not knowing what Austin wanted when he was six. Jim Cornette: “He cracked Kris’ Kringle!”
We see the last ten seconds of New Day’s first triple threat win, plus the events that set up the main event. Only the last few minutes of the main event airs but New Day breaks the record. We also get the post match spear to Kevin Owens.
A rundown of Sunday’s card wraps up the show.
Overall Rating: D+. This is a situation where your individual tastes will vary wildly. This show wasn’t about much other than filling in time because they didn’t tape anything new. I’d much rather see something like this than just Raw matches though and it’s always cool to crack open the video library. Other than that pretty bad Piper thing, all of the clips were either short enough to not be bad or funny enough on their own. Good show this week and instantly more entertaining than two jobbers having a dull match.
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