Cordova’s Commentary: The Not So Greatest Royal Rumble

A week ago today, the WWE turned heel.

I’m not kidding guys. Chant it loud and proud, because for once, one of the most famous taunts in wrestling is true and real.

YOU SOLD OUT.

But hey, it’s not unexpected. After all, one of their own once said that “everyone has a price”. And if rumors are true, the WWE’s price is somewhere in the range of 9 figures for an event. That’s a lot of money, and to be fair, I’ve agreed to hypothetically do a bunch of a ridiculous things for far less money (who didn’t play the “would you do this for a million dollars” game as kids?), but then again, I don’t have all that much money to begin with. Desperation is a powerful tool, greed is an evil one.

All of this leads us to last Friday’s Greatest Royal Rumble, a royal-serving celebration of a country with very controversial values, stances, and actions. It was an overly glorified house show, with the biggest moment being the crowning of the Woken Wyatt team as Tag Champs. The problem was, it was not treated as a house show, it was treated as a major show, with some wondering whether it was “bigger than WrestleMania”.

This becomes problematic because treating it like an important show means that you had some major talents that were not involved in such a major show. And what’s worse, the reasoning for those talents not being involved ranges from troublesome to downright disgusting.

The most obvious, glaring omission from the show was anyone lacking a Y chromosome. In Saudi Arabia, women just recently were granted the right to drive cars, so it should come as no surprise as to their ban on female in ring performers. What’s worse though, is that an ad aired for the show and female performers were accidentally shown in the ad. As a result, the kingdom APOLOGIZED to its people for such a display. If you are a feminist, THIS should be your battleground. For anything we see in America, we certainly don’t apologize to our nation for daring to show talented women performing a sport!

What a major step back for a revolution that, if you believe the rumors, may culminate in main eventing WrestleMania next year. And to think, these women could be THE attraction at WrestleMania, but one month later not be featured at all on the next “huge” show.

That alone should raise some eyebrows, but it isn’t the end of the issues. Another talent that did not appear on the show was Sami Zayn. He is of Syrian descent and felt uncomfortable performing in a country that does not get along with his people. And again, if this were a house show, it probably wouldn’t be a big deal. But when you promote this as a huge event and advertise that he will be there, it makes you look quite stupid to not have the decency to ask first.

Lastly, the semi-main event of the show featured Brock Lesnar and Roman Reigns. In the week leading up, there was speculation that Paul Heyman would not be in Brock’s corner for the match, so rumors spread as to why. But here’s something that is not a rumor. Saudi Arabian law forbids entry into the country if your passport has been stamped by Israel. So, if Heyman, a Jewish man, took his kids to their homeland at some point, Brock would have been advocate-less on Friday.

Of course, nothing of what I said made any difference in WWE’s decision-making. But what makes it worse is the insufferable pandering the WWE does when they do these shows. I mean, if you watched the show in a vacuum, you’d think the Saudi royal family were these wonderful, hospitable people and the Saudis are the most wonderful people in the world. I don’t want to put down an entire nation and I’m sure there’s a lot of great people there, but the incessant gratitude was nauseating if you thought about even half of what we have discussed. It’s status quo for wrestling though. You give us money, we’ll put you over. For proof, see the obnoxious post-Mania crowds that the announce team called “passionate”.

Money talks, and WWE listens.

And therein lies the biggest problem, WWE is profitable. Had this show flopped or had the Saudis not given WWE handfuls of guaranteed money, these criticisms might mean something. But because the WWE can collect in the tens of millions simply for showing up once a year, it will all fall on deaf ears. Not that I’m deluding myself into thinking the WWE will read my column or anything.

Whether they read it or not though, here’s the truth. WWE should be ashamed of itself for pandering so hard to a backwards culture and for their willingness to sell out their women, Syrians, Jews, and whomever else was and is hurt by their event in Saudi Arabia. And all for a show that wasn’t even that good.

Eric Cordova is the host of the Mouth of the South Shore Radio Show which can be found and followed at:

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