Insurrextion 2001: The Wrestlemania Leftovers
IMG Credit: 2001
Again, this is a very old review so I apologize for the lower quality.
Insurrextion 2001
Date: May 5, 2001
Location: Earls Court, London, England
Attendance: 15,784
Commentators: Michael Cole, Paul Heyman
So it’s a month after Mania X7 here and we’re back in England. This is a double request in a way as I was asked to do British PPVs as well as this show in particular so there you are. We’re in the two man power trip era here as the main event is HHH and Austin vs. Undertaker for the title which is more complicated than it should be. There’s also the Queen’s Cup which is a fictitious title for this show only. This is 2001 WWF. Do you need more explanation than that? The Alliance hasn’t started yet so this should be good. Let’s get to it.
We open with Commissioner Regal saying the whole card has been changed. Vince comes in and says that Regal is doing stuff he’s not allowed to do. Regal says he didn’t do that. Vince says he didn’t do that. Apparently Linda did all this stuff. Linda of course pops up behind Vince as he’s ranting about everything. This segment goes on way too long. After five minutes, we’re ready to open the show.
What an odd commentary team.
Grandmaster Sexay vs. Eddie Guerrero
This is Grandmaster’s final appearance with the company for reasons of suck I guess. Eddie lost the European Title to Matt Hardy of all people. It’s not like being European meant anything with only Regal and Bulldog being European. Eddie would be gone soon for drugs anyway so there we are. This is a very hot crowd with one Phoenix being in attendance. Yeah he was the other request.
Eddie doing the Sexay dance is hilarious to say the least. I think Eddie was supposed to be champion here as he lost it like a week earlier. Grandmaster, how do you suck so much? Your dad is a legend and you’re just a freaking joke. And that’s being nice. He’s like an annoying indy gimmick that isn’t sure what his gimmick is.
The crowd is ALL OVER Eddie. That’s not bad. Grandmaster misses a…something and gets rolled up with Eddie using the ropes to win from nowhere. That was really abrupt.
Rating: D+. Uh what the heck was that? Seriously it felt like it was 3 minutes short or something. Also, why were these two in a singles match? It’s very random but that’s what you get on these shows. Not the worst, but an odd choice.
HHH is with Stephanie. She cannot act. They’re tag champions here too. He talks about the main event. Yeah that’s it.
Dean Malenko/Terri/Perry Saturn vs. Hardcore Holly/Crash Holly/Molly Holly
Uh…yeah. See what I mean when I say these cards had a tendency to feel thrown together? Terri is someone I rarely get the appeal of. Outside of her looks, what’s the point? Ah ok Terri isn’t going to wrestle. Got it. Yeah I don’t care either. The Hollies get a pop. Molly of course beats up Terri for a bit to a big pop.
Ok so it’s Hardcore and Saturn to start. Paul calls Saturn the Bald Bombshell. I like it. Dear lord help me I like it. Cole’s voice sounds a bit horse. Dang it what is the deal with the air horns over there? They’re freaking annoying! Saturn is fun to watch but he’s a bit nuts.
For the second time in the match we’re told he’s a machine. Ok good to know. Molly is on the apron even though she’s not in this match that I know of. Crash is freaking OVER. What the heck??? Terri breaks up a pin and we get a catfight. Saturn hits the Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza on Crash to get the pin. Only in wrestling would that make sense.
Rating: D. Again, what in the heck was this? It’s just a random match that made no sense and was just there. It’s not particularly good but it’s a good bit bad. This was just a waste of time but I guess they had to pad the two hour and twenty minute show somehow.
Regal is REALLY popular in London. This is just weird to see.
Regal is next to the Queen’s Cup, which would be Edge’s King of the Ring Cup.
Test is injured so he can’t fight tonight. Show says he’s a coward. It’s weird seeing Show with hair. This was during Show’s one piece swimsuit era. I don’t know what they were thinking during this time period but whatever. Test comes out and gets his head handed to him in a non-match. Dang his music was awesome.
I will stand by what I said when I said Test should have gotten a very short title reign in 1999 but it went to Big Show instead. Show kind of does an open challenge and then leaves before anyone can answer it. He looks way more intimidating with hair. And here’s Bradshaw to fight him.
Bradshaw vs. Big Show
Odd again. All of these European shows have a bad case of strangeness to them. How weird is it to think that Bradshaw would be a more important world champion than Show? Those chops Show did were freaking insane. EMTs come out to take care of Test. A flying shoulder just looks cool. There goes the referee.
Show goes after Test when he’s trying to leave which of course doesn’t work. A big boot into a steel chair and the Clothesline ends this with Bradshaw winning it for NO explainable reason. Dude it’s 2001 and Bradshaw beat Big Show. What sense does that make?
Rating: C-. Not bad for a big man fight. The booking is bearable I guess as it’s a show no one is going to see or hear about for months. This was just your standard battle of the big men which usually works pretty well. This was fine for what it was I guess but REALLY short.
Austin says Taker is stupid and the Decade of Destruction ends tonight. Amazingly, this is the halfway point of Taker’s WWE run. That’s insane.
Edge/Christian vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz vs. X-Factor
For those of you that have no freaking clue who X-Factor is, there’s likely a pair of reasons for that. One is that half of the team is Justin Credible and the other is that the second half of the team is X-Pac. They were a blink and you’ll miss it stable that also included Albert. Their music was AWESOME though, even if they never won anything.
The Dudleys are of course WAY over. None of these guys are champions here and it’s elimination rules. That’s fun if nothing else. Seriously, why is X-Factor in this? DANG the Hardys got a nice pop.
This was just after the Hardys had their mini feud with Austin and HHH which transitioned to the Brothers of Destruction vs. Two Man Power Trip which is one of my favorite moments ever. If you ever want to see me get fired up, give me a scene where a face comes in from nowhere to save the day. I live for stuff like that. Ok not really but I really like them.
Justin and Bubba start. It’s a low ECW ratio tonight with only 3/8 being in the original organization. How in the world can people say that company meant nothing at all? Seriously, they’re stupid if they refuse to admit the truth about how influential it was. Justin and Bubba start us off. You can tell Heyman loves this. And now we shift to Christian and Matt, both future ECW Champions. That’s freaking amazing. Ok not really but it’s 230 AM and I’m tired so it’s more interesting than it should be.
Jeff gets a POP from the girls in the crowd. X-Pac comes in and is said to have youth and experience. In TMNT 2 that would make him a Keno/Splinter hybrid. Wow that would be epic. A women’s battle royal is mentioned which I don’t think is coming during a Bronco Buster. I hate that move. I truly do.
Jeff comes in again and again gets a big pop. Sweet goodness this was 9 years ago. That’s hard to believe. Everything breaks down and the Hardys double team special and a missed Albert splash ends X Factor. Less than ten seconds later an Unprettier puts Jeff out.
So it’s Edge and Christian vs. the Dudleys. Again, why did we need to have X Factor in there? This turns into your standard tag match with D-Von being the face in trouble, or playing Ricky Morton for those old school fans. This is one of those pairings that it’s just hard to mess up. Ah there’s your tag and Christian is LAUNCHED up on a back body drop.
Cole, the idiot that he is, says that What’s Up is being said in a universal language. Cole, IT’S THE SAME IN ENGLAND AND IN AMERICA. WOW I cannot stand that idiot at times. Table is attempted but doesn’t work. 3D is avoided, perhaps because they shout 3D just before it. With them on the floor, Rhyno hits the ring and gores Bubba so Edge can get the pin. Rhyno sets up a table but here’s Spike. Rhyno takes 3D through the table.
Rating: B-. Match number 3837 in their more or less never ending series. The key here though is they had known each other so well that the matches were almost always good. This was no exception. X-Factor had no point being there but whatever. The Edge/Dudleys and 4 team parts were fine so it passes with a decent grade.
We get highlights of a charity dinner from the previous night. Stephanie in a dress is a good thing. This is always cool and anytime something is being done for charity, even just showing up and saying some prewritten thing that you don’t mean, means a lot as you’re donating your time to something good, in this case being Make-A-Wish. Nothing wrong with this as charity is always cool.
Angle is ready for his 2/3 falls match and wants his medals that Benoit stole back. He would eventually get them back in a hilarious segment where Benoit had them down his tights and Angle grabbed them out and kissed them.
Steven Richards and Ivory, still in RTC, are here. Seriously, they picked this guy to substitute for Big Show in No Mercy? Why wasn’t he in the game in the first place? That never made any sense. We hear about Page Three and the models thing which is just amusing and really does show the cultural issues.
We saw one for like a second on Super Bowl Sunday and ever since then the halftime show has been acts my dad enjoys. Apparently the women’s battle royal is cancelled. This of course gets booed. The girls are going to come out and show how their ways are changed. First is Jackie. How about changing her to fired? Freshly face Trish is next and of course looks good.
Third is Lita. Sweet goodness she was a huge deal. She had the looks, the sex appeal, the look and the abilities. Note that there is a difference between looks and look. So wait was this a four Diva battle royal? What the heck? Ivory makes fun of them all and you figure the rest out.
Trish is really bad in the ring at this point and there goes Ivory’s clothes. RTC was a great gimmick if nothing else. Trish hits on him. This is rather amusing. He gets a low blow of course and there go his pants. Lita takes her top off and we get her cool theme song if nothing else following the moonsault. Harmless fun.
We see a clip from the Ultimate Submission match at Backlash with Benoit and Angle. They were tied up with 4 seconds to go and Benoit held it out but tapped like 2 seconds after. Benoit then won in overtime. He stole the medals on Raw, leading to this.
Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle
2/3 falls of Benoit and Angle? OH YEAH!!! Angle wants his medals and Benoit says they’re in a warm place. Apparently this is a week after Backlash. Should be noted that this is one of the combinations that I start the grading out at a B instead of a C given who is in the ring. Heyman says there’s a 6 pound weight difference between the two with Benoit at 229 and Angle at 236. Now how could a man with that kind of education have accounting issues?
The mat work that these two could do was amazing to say the least. It’s art out there. How often do you get to say that? Both go for their submissions and neither can get it this early of course. Dang Angle could throw a suplex. Then again so can Benoit. Benoit just goes nuts with the suplexes of various geographic designs. After about 9 of them a diving headbutt gives Benoit a completely clean pin.
That’s a bit odd but I guess you could argue that Angle knew he didn’t have to win the first fall. Angle pulls a Bret Hart and pretends to be hurt after the first fall. He hits a belly to belly from the top that is just a thing of beauty. It’s so crisp and it looks perfect the entire way. It goes to show you how good things could be if you just go with the basics and a wrestling based style.
I love how basic they keep things and at the same time how effective it can be. Then you get something out of nowhere like a DDT from Benoit. When has either of these guys used a DDT? Angle Slam is countered and it’s German time again.
The headbutt misses this time though so we get a bit of psychology there. It’s minor but it’s there. Both submissions are reversed but Benoit reverses Angle’s reversal into a rollup for the second straight fall. Post match Benoit pulls the medals out of his tights. This is great stuff and it’s so simple.
Rating: B+. Solid stuff here but did you expect something else? With only 15 minutes for two falls, how great can they make stuff though? They always had great matches and it’s pretty clear I love watching them. The wrestling was crisp and it came off great of course. The two straight falls were a bit of a surprise though so that’s a bit odd but still, solid stuff all around.
Austin complains about life in general. And the three treat Debra like crap. Good. She looks like it too. Stephanie looks great so there you go.
We get the exact same video package from Mania about Jericho vs. Regal. Well to be fair, how much new material is there and how much new stuff new stuff is there? Ah ok they did add some new stuff. That’s good. The start was the same though. We recap the Duchess of Queensbury match from Backlash which had a bunch of weird rules where more or less only Regal could win. Jericho beat Regal up on Raw. See, THIS is what we need at these shows: a reason to freaking care.
The Queen’s Cup is presented. Yeah it means nothing.
Queen’s Cup: William Regal vs. Chris Jericho
Regal gets a nice pop. Why are British wrestlers listed in stones in America and pounds in England? Regal looks a good bit less fat here for some reason. Jericho gets a much better pop which doesn’t surprise me. Dang Jericho was awesome at this time. Again: Jericho and Edge need face title runs. So does Orton. I have issues calling the month long transitional reign he had in 04 a real reign.
This should be sweet. Jericho busts out a high cross body. Where did that come from? They do the bad shoulder for Jericho as they did at Mania. Sweet goodness these two are fun to watch. Back to back good matches on a European show? What the heck is going on? This is a fun match. Regal is getting to show off quite a bit. DaNG Regal’s thigh is all blue and purple. Apparently he has a thigh bruise. That’s an understatement if nothing else.
Regal hooks a cobra clutch to go I guess retro on us. Regal is controlling here in case you were confused. Jericho is tied in the ropes which is a spot we need to see more often. An enziguri gets Jericho out of trouble and both guys are down.
No Jericho didn’t hit an enziguri while tied in the ropes. He’s great but not that great. I love that missile dropkick off the middle rope. It’s a cool spot while not being as high risk. Lionsault is blocked. Regal uses the spinout slam that Cena uses now. Wow Cena was just a year away at this point. And all of a sudden the Walls are on and we’re done. That came from a good bit of nowhere. Post match Regal breaks the cup over Jericho.
Rating: B+. This is a weird grade for me. While I liked it better than the Benoit/Angle match, it’s getting the same grade. They’re different kinds of matches. This was more of a popcorn match while Benoit and Angle were more of a performance. Both were very good, but at the same time they were completely different kinds of matches if that makes sense. It’s better than their very good Mania match, which is saying something I think.
We recap the Brothers of Destruction vs. The Two Man Power Trip which had three men of course. The Brothers lost the tag titles to them at Backlash in the all titles are on the line match. HHH is IC Champion and Austin is WWF Champion. Kane had a bad elbow and it cost them the tag titles, so Austin and HHH have all the main titles.
They injured Kane so Taker is on his own tonight in a handicap match for the world title. Kane would win the IC Title at Judgment Day and I think the next night HHH would tear his quad so we never got to the end of the angle, which of course would have been Austin vs. HHH, likely at Summerslam. Not sure if the Alliance would have happened then or not but I’d think not.
WWF Title: Undertaker vs. HHH/Steve Austin
Keep in mind, it’s announced that Taker only wins the title if he pins Austin. In other words, there is no point in going after HHH and no point in Austin ever wanting to tag in. I never liked Austin’s music at this time. He gets a pop even though he’s a heel which he needs to be at the time as his face status wasn’t going to work. Yet he was still getting pops. The problem was that he wasn’t going to be able to stay over with Rock as the epic face that he was so they had to turn Austin heel.
That and they had done Austin vs. everyone else already. But then again I think I’m the only person to like Austin’s heel turn. Taker uses his brain and grabs a chair to hold both guys off. Austin’s leg braces are partially gold. That just looks odd. What I liked about Austin as a heel was he was still the same badass. He just worked with Vince.
That was the problem with Austin though: he had so many heel tendencies already that it was hard to truly turn him without killing him completely. Corporate Austin wouldn’t have worked, at least not in my eyes. No one would have bought it after all the years he had fighting authority. They fight in the aisle as I’m assuming we have DQs here. Why in the world would you try a piledriver on the floor? Has that EVER worked? Well yeah but not in a main event match.
Taker COMPLETELY misses an elbow smash and HHH sells it anyway. That was just awful looking. Again, one ECW guy in there. Did anyone not go there at some point? Well I guess HHH and Taker didn’t so there. Austin is down…somewhere so it’s HHH vs. Taker. That works for me. Something is just looking awkward with these two tonight. It’s rather weird. Ah ok there are tags here. That’s where Austin is.
The announcers say Austin has bought into the team player idea so he’ll tag in. I’ll buy that I guess. Thesz Press gets a pop of course. That’s the problem with this and the problem with AJ as a heel: their offenses are designed to be faces and to get face pops. The character is heel, but the in ring stuff is face. That’s a big problem. Austin gets a chair shot in thanks to Stephanie distracting the referee. The kickout gets a REACTION.
I got tired of saying pop but that’s what it was. The tagging is a great help here as it makes this something close to believable. We hit a sleeper which goes on for way too long but I guess it’s ok. No idea why but it’s made me too sleepy to argue. This is mainly HHH vs. Taker of course. So now Austin hits a sleeper and Taker switches to a sleeper.
Boy that WWF is making sure to switch things up aren’t they? HHH goes to the top (WTF???) and does that really annoying spot where he jumps straight down and lands on Taker’s up foot. WHAT IS HE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING??? Taker makes a comeback and HHH goes through the table via (armbar) chokeslam. Cole is LOSING IT over this. CHokeslam hits on Austin. Taker is busted open from something.
Might have been from the sleepiness from earlier. Here’s Vince for no apparent reason. He of course gets chokeslammed and HHH gets hits with that and a chair for the pin. No title change though. I think I like that ending actually. That blood looks really bad. Oh dang it’s on the side of his head. It being legit helps a lot.
Rating: B. Not bad at all here. They managed to make this something close to believable, which is more than I would have expected of them. While it’s kind of ridiculous to think Taker beat both of them at once, the way they did it kind of worked so I was buying into it. It’s your standard main event though so that’s fine. This was good stuff I thought and a fine way to close the show.
Overall Rating: B. I liked this a lot actually. It’s by far and away the best of these shows and while it’s far from perfect, it’s certainly a good show. The first 50 minutes or so are pretty weak but after that it takes off and it takes off very well. There’s nothing great here and nothing worth going out of your way to see, but this is a good show and worth being a PPV for a change. WWF was hot at this point and this is no exception. Good show and worth checking out if you for some reason run across it.
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