Smackdown – July 21, 2005: The Fake Main Event And The Real Main Event
Smackdown
Date: July 21, 2005
Location: First Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz
It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and that means things are mostly set in stone. There are a lot of things that can be built up a bit better though and Sunday’s show could use a bit of that. The show isn’t looking too bad aside from the main event, which is little more than a way for Batista to get his first title defense as Smackdown Champion. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
The opening video is paid for by Friends Of JBL. Everything started for him last year and now it’s time for him to get the title back. Tonight, we get his victory celebration for Sunday’s title victory.
Opening sequence.
Rey Mysterio vs. Super Crazy
Back from a break with Eddie on commentary and Rey hammering away in the corner. Eddie uses the time to explain that he’s just doing all this because he loves Rey. Crazy sends Rey out of the corner and the waistlock goes on. As Eddie gets angrier and angrier, Crazy grabs the Rocking Horse to work on all the limbs. That’s broken up so Crazy puts on a seated abdominal stretch.
With that not lasting long, they chop it out as Eddie talks about being the man of the house. The springboard spinning crossbody gives Rey two and a headscissors into the corner is good for the same. Another springboard is broken up though and Crazy gets two off a springboard moonsault. Rey is right back with a headscissors into 619 position, drawing Eddie in with a rake (stolen from Psicosis) to Rey’s back for the DQ.
Rating: C. This was long but they did the smart thing by not having either of them take a fall. They seem to have plans for the Mexicools so having them lose this early would be a bad idea. Eddie was going even crazier on commentary and it makes the heel turn work that much more. He can be all sinister in his regular promos but now he’s breaking down into just pure obsession and madness.
Post break Eddie is going to leave but Theodore Long says not so fast. Eddie is wrestling tonight against a mystery opponent.
Christian brags about beating Booker T. last week and promises to beat him again on Sunday. If Josh Matthews doesn’t like it, go back to his parent’s house and his basement room and complain about it on the internet. Booker is going to be a two time two time loser.
Heidenreich reads Animal a poem about feeling Hawk’s presence and how big of a chance this is. Animal says Heidenreich is more like Hawk than he thought. Heidenreich: “What a rush.” Oh give me a break.
JBL is a Great American. Like Neil Armstrong.
Animal/Heidenreich vs. Nick Berk/Julio Dinero
Powerslam and Doomsday Device finish in thirty seconds. MNM is shown panicking in the back.
Raw Rebound.
Eddie Guerrero vs. ???
It’s…..Chris Benoit, because that’s as much of a guaranteed good match as you can get. Before the match, Eddie tries to run so Benoit calls him in, saying they’ve been close friends for years. Eddie gets back in and decks Benoit to start in a hurry. A chair is brought in but the referee takes it away, only to have Eddie kick Benoit low for an early two. Eddie’s boot rake over the face but Benoit snaps off a German suplex as we take a break.
Back with Eddie wrapping the knee around the post and sending him face first into the announcers’ table. Eddie cranks on the leg and puts on a leglock, sending Benoit rolling over to the ropes. Benoit fights up and tries the Sharpshooter but the knee gives out. That means the leglock goes right back on so Benoit makes it to the ropes again, though a bit more slowly this time.
Eddie goes up but gets headbutted and superplexed back down, with Benoit busted open after the headbutts. Being the smart villain, Eddie kicks at the cut but Benoit snaps off the rolling German suplex for a double knockdown. The Swan Dive gets a delayed two with Eddie getting a boot on the rope. Back up and Eddie tries the Three Amigos, only to get reversed into the Crossface. Eddie is in the ropes within about two seconds….and takes the countout.
Rating: B. That’s about the standard for these two as they don’t know how to have a bad match. They’re one of the best pairings you can find and it was no exception here. This was the second match in a row where you don’t want either of them taking a fall so it was the right way to go. I could get used to this thinking things through concept.
Post match Rey jumps Eddie and beats him up on the stage.
We look back at Undertaker beating up Muhammad Hassan’s attorney last week.
Here’s Candice Michelle for a special announcement: the Great American Bash will be available for free to the military. Yeah we already knew that. Cue Melina, who isn’t happy that Candice is guest referee for Melina vs. Torrie Wilson on Sunday. Melina doesn’t like Candice and goes for her clothes, only to have Torrie run in for the save. Candice is so humiliated that she dances a bit.
Video on the Great American Bash press conference.
Booker T. vs. Simon Dean
Simon says Sharmell goes to the buffet line five times, five times, five times, five times, five times and the beating is on in a hurry. Booker doesn’t waste time and punches, kicks and kicks some more, setting up the ax kick for the pin in a hurry.
Post match Booker says Christian is just like that Richard Simmons Tae Bo wannabe.
JBL is a Great American. Like Ronald Reagan.
The Boogeyman is coming.
Long video on Guerrero vs. Mysterio.
Great American Bash rundown, with the Blue World Order vs. the Mexicools added.
It’s time for JBL’s victory celebration, meaning the ring is covered in red, white and blue. Orlando Jordan handles the introduction and the confetti cannons go off. JBL looks like Uncle Sam/Apollo Creed and comes to the ring in an open topped Cadillac just to complete the visual. He talks about some great Americans and brags about how awesome America is.
We take over countries because we can and because we should, since might has always been right. We do give to the poor nations who need a handout, but some Americans are weak. Like Batista, who ran away from JBL at Wrestlemania like a coward. JBL isn’t happy about Batista being on the cover of Smackdown Magazine. This is his show, but don’t worry because next month, there will be a new issue on the newsstand.
We see a new cover, with JBL holding the title over a fallen Batista. On Sunday, Batista is getting put down because there are legends and Hall of Famers, but there is only one wrestling god. Cue Batista to call JBL out for looking like an idiot. Batista calls him a phony and a bully so on Sunday, JBL is getting exposed. The fight is on and Batista cleans house, including putting on the Uncle Sam hat and jacket to end the show. They’re trying to do something with this, but JBL is little more than target practice for Batista and Guerrero vs. Mysterio is the real main event and they aren’t trying to hide it.
Overall Rating: C-. This show ran into the problem of not being able to do anything else with Mysterio vs. Guerrero. The story has been set up for a few weeks now and there isn’t anything left for them to do with it. Batista vs. JBL isn’t doing anything for me, but Christian vs. Booker should be good and…..yeah two matches are enough to carry a show, right? Not a great show here, but Eddie vs Benoit got us far enough.
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