Dark – March 24, 2020: What I Wanted The Show To Be
IMG Credit: AEW
Dark
Date: March 24, 2020
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Excalibur, Taz
This is a special edition of the show as they are cramming it full, for the sake of bringing in some indy wrestlers to work some dates in light of the Coronavirus epidemic. That’s nice of them, and much to my relief, the extra matches are being crammed into the same amount of time as usual. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Taz and Excalibur run down the card.
Jake Hager vs. Joe Alonzo
Hager pounds him in the back to start and throws Alonzo down with a wheelbarrow suplex. A Rock Bottom out of the corner sets up the head and arm choke to finish Alonzo at 1:26. Total squash.
Matt Sells/Jon Cruz vs. Natural Nightmares
Sells and Cruz have a woman named Skyler Moore with them while Brandi Rhodes is here with the Nightmares. Dustin armdrags Cruz down to start and a clothesline turns him inside out so Marshall can get two. It’s off to Sells for some hip swiveling so Marshall returns the favor with a clothesline to give Dustin two of his own. Sells’ palm strike gets two on Marshall and a middle rope double stomp to Marshall’s arm keeps him down. Marshall grabs a Lethal Combination on Cruz and it’s back to Dustin for the snap powerslam. A Dominator/sliding cutter combination finishes Cruz at 4:22.
Rating: C. Perfectly watchable and acceptable tag match here and that’s all it needed to be. The Nightmares have turned into a nice little team and while I don’t think they have much of a future as far as going up the ladder, they’re good for a match like this and maybe as some dark horse challengers for the titles one day.
SCU vs. Robert Anthony/Shawn Spears
Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian for SCU here. Anthony wristlocks Kazarian to start as Tully Blanchard is filming the match on his phone. An armbar has Kazarian slowed down even more and it’s off to Spears, sending Kazarian backing up. That’s quite the suckering in though as Spears charges into an armdrag and it’s off to Daniels in a hurry.
Everything breaks down in a hurry and Anthony pulls Daniels outside for a beating. Anthony comes in for a spinning gutwrench faceplant for two and it’s Spears mocking the THIS IS AWESOME chants (with claps of course). Three straight slams give Anthony two and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long either as it’s Spears coming in, only to get rolled up twice in a row.
Kazarian comes back in and starts to clean house, including making Spears hit Anthony by mistake. Spears gets knocked outside, leaving Anthony to hit a rolling Death Valley Driver for two on Kazarian. Everyone gets back in again and Anthony runs Spears over this time. That’s enough for Spears, who walks out again, leaving Anthony to take the Best Meltzer Ever for the pin at 10:34.
Rating: C. Another nice little match here with Anthony getting to show off a bit. They had mentioned that Anthony had wrestled for over twenty years and you could see the experience on display. It’s not a great match or anything, but given that it should have been little more than a squash and wound up being fine, I’m pleased.
Kip Sabian vs. Suge D.
Penelope Ford is here with Sabian and her kiss to Sabian lets Suge get two off a rollup. Suge walks into a Dropkick to the face though and it’s time to start choking in the corner. A missed charge gives Suge a breather but he gets caught in a hanging swinging neckbreaker. Suge trips him down though and gets in a discus forearm, only to get half and half suplexed. Sabian grabs a grounded Octopus for the tap at 4:40.
Rating: C-. Suge isn’t someone I’m overly familiar with but he had some charisma and got a change to show what he can do in the ring here. It’s not a good match or anything but Sabian needed a win in there somewhere as it feels like he has gone months without doing anything of note. Fine enough way to showcase a lesser known name too.
Colt Cabana vs. Brandon Cutler
Cabana takes him down in a hurry to start but offers Cutler a free hand for a break. That earns Cutler some sarcastic applause so he does the same as Cabana, who gets wristdragged down. Both of them miss each other a lot until Cutler armdrags him into a quickly broken armbar. Cabana tries a clean break out of the corner but makes sure to talk a bit of trash, earning himself a shot to the head. A hurricanrana sends Cabana outside for a suicide dive but Cutler misses a dive back inside. An elbow to the head sets up the Superman Pin to finish Cutler at 4:32.
Rating: D+. This wasn’t my style but Cabana knows how to do this match in his sleep and can turn up the serious if he needs to at any time. He’s a nice asset to have around here due to that versatility and AEW is smart to keep him in spots like this at the moment. Cutler continues to just a person on the roster but they could do a lot worse.
Post match, respect is shown.
Corey Hollis/Mike Reed vs. Sonny Kiss/Joey Janela
Janela even gets pyro before he pulls Hollis into the corner by the wrist. Kiss comes in for the handspring slap as Taz talks about not liking so many tags in so little time. Hollis gets kicked into a German suplex from Janela and we get some comedic posing. Reed sneaks in for a knee to Kiss’ face and another knee breaks up Kiss’ bridge.
The chinlock doesn’t last long and Hollis kicks Kiss in the face for two. A belly to back suplex doesn’t work as well though as Kiss flips out and brings Janela back in. Everything breaks down and it’s a running kick to Reed in the corner. Janela climbs onto Kiss’ back for the top rope elbow, followed by a flying splits splash to give Kiss the pin at 6:15.
Rating: C-. It was just a step above a comedy match but at least Kiss finally beat someone. It’s not like this is going to mean anything in the long term but for a final match on a pretty packed show, it worked out well enough. I’ve seen Skyler before and I don’t need to see Janela ever again so at least things even out a little bit.
Overall Rating: C. Now this is more of what Dark should be like week to week. There isn’t a need to have some ten to fifteen minute match with the lower half of the roster. Just get them in, get them on camera, and move on to someone else. It’s a good example of less is more and that’s what I got here, as the show breezed by and nothing overstayed its welcome, or even really came close to it for that matter. Nice change of pace here and it worked well.
Results
Jake Hager b. Joe Alonzo – Head and arm choke
Natural Nightmares b. Matt Sells/Jon Cruz – Dominator/sliding cutter combination to Cruz
SCU b. Robert Anthony/Shawn Spears – Best Meltzer Ever to Spears
Kip Sabian b. Suge D. – Grounded Octopus
Colt Cabana b. Brandon Cutler – Superman pin
Sonny Kiss/Joey Janela b. Mike Reed/John Skyler – Top rope splits splash to Reed
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