Dark – August 18, 2020: The Latest One

Dark
Date: August 18, 2020
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Taz, Veda Scott

We’re coming up on a weird week here as Dynamite will be going up against half of Takeover on Saturday as the NBA Playoffs are moving this week’s show. I’m not sure what to expect from this show, but I’d bet on a bunch of not so competitive matches with names who aren’t often on Dynamite. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Commentary gives us a quick preview, with Taz not being pleased with Veda being taller than him.

Michael Nakazawa vs. Kip Sabian

Penelope Ford is here too. Sabian takes him down by the arm to start but stops to kiss Ford. Nakazawa gets in a takedown of his own, uses the oil, and spins around on Sabian’s back. Sabian isn’t pleased and sends him to the apron for a springboard kick to the face. That means a running flip dive to take Nakazawa down again as Taz talks about Turkish baby oil. A belly to back suplex connects and Nakazawa loads up the underwear claw, which, OF FREAKING COURSE, goes onto his own face. Sabian DDTs him and hits a hanging swinging neckbreaker (apparently the new Deathly Hallows) for the pin at 4:20.

Rating: D-. I’m not a big Sabian fan but he was one of the best things I’ve ever seen by comparison. I know Nakazawa is Kenny Omega’s friend and people have been hired for worse but….come on already man. It’s not even occasionally funny like Orange Cassidy or anything close to it, which makes him one of the worst things I’ve seen in a very long time.

Shawn Dean/Frank Stone vs. Joey Janela/Sonny Kiss

The strong looking Stone shoves Joey down to start and it’s off to Dean, who gets caught in a quick headlock. A Russian legsweep into a Meteora from Kiss has Dean in trouble of his own, meaning Stone comes back in. As Taz talks about almost getting in a fight with Steve McMichael in Joe Gomez’s bar (that raises more questions than we have time for), Stone splashes Joey in the corner and plants him with a belly to belly.

Something close to a Demolition Decapitator gets two and Stone adds a backbreaker to keep Joey in trouble. A double DDT allows Joey to make the tag though and it’s Sonny coming in to pick the pace way up. That includes the handspring slap in the corner to Dean but the middle rope splits splash misses. Cryme Tyme’s old G9 gets two on Sonny and everything breaks down. Joey’s top rope elbow into the splits splash gives Kiss the pin on Dean at 5:43.

Rating: C-. Janela and Kiss might not be the best team in the world but they have gone from absolutely nothing to something completely watchable most of the time. There is no shame in being the best team on Dark and it isn’t likely that they are ever moving beyond what they are here, at least not permanently. They’re fine enough for a show like this and the match was fine enough.

Shawn Spears vs. Will Hobbs

Tully Blanchard is here too. Spears grabs a headlock to start but Hobbs shoulders him into the corner. That’s enough to send Spears outside for a breather but he comes back in to start on Hobbs’ leg. A dropkick to the knee sets up a slingshot splash to the leg, plus some trash talking. Hobbs is back with a spinebuster for no cover as the knee is gone at the moment. Back up and another shot to the knee sets up the Death Valley Driver to finish Hobbs at 4:44.

Rating: D+. Another match and another instance where I have no reason to believe that Spears is anything more than meh. He’s fine at what he does but I don’t ever remember being interested in something he did or said. There’s a reason he never got that high up the ladder anywhere else and it is on display again here. Spears can have a passable match with anyone, but don’t expect more than that.

Post match, Spears hits him with the glove.

Ricky Starks talks about being too handsome to be hardcore and he’s coming for Darby Allin, who looks like he was raised on dog food and dope. This is going to be Allin’s last supper for messing with Ricky Starks. Old school “I don’t like you because of X” promo here.

Initiative vs. Hybrid 2

Leva Bates is here with the Initiative. Avalon and Angelico don’t do much to start so Evans springboards in, where Cutler kicks him in the head. A very bridging rollup gives Evans two and sets off a pinfall reversal sequence for two each. Avalon comes back in for a double chop into a double splash for another near fall. There’s a dropkick to put Evans on the floor but Evans takes the book from Avalon for a cheap shot.

Angelico’s belly to back suplex stays on Avalon’s back and Evans starts in with the trash talk. The choking ensues in the corner as Tony talks about having a big mustache back in the 80s. Evans misses a jumping backsplash though and the hot tag brings in Cutler to clean house. Angelico is sent hard onto the ramp and Cutler hits a Phenomenal Forearm to drop Evans.

Avalon comes in for a knee to Evans’ chest and Angelico has to make a last second save. An assisted 450 gives Evans two on Cutler and he adds a springboard corkscrew moonsault onto both of them. Back in and Cutler escapes Angelico’s Splash Mountain and Avalon hits a split legged moonsault for two more. Now Splash Mountain sends Avalon into the corner and the 630 gives Evans the pin at 10:41.

Rating: C-. Another match that wasn’t too bad with the near falls working well enough. At the same time though, there wasn’t exactly the greatest amount of drama as the Initiative isn’t about to win in a spot like this. Throw in that the Hybrid 2 isn’t all that interesting in the first place and there wasn’t much that could work out here.

Red Velvet vs. Abadon

Velvet is “straight out of your mama’s kitchen.” Abadon on the other hand crawls to the ring, as is her custom. Velvet goes straight for the arm but gets shoved out of the corner for a running kick to the face. A headbutt cuts Velvet off again and Abadon sends her out to the apron. Velvet manages a kick to the head though and brings her to the apron as well, only to get pulled down hard by the arm. Back in and Velvet flips out of a belly to back suplex so Abadon blasts her with a clothesline. The Cemetery Drive (Widow’s Peak) finishes Velvet at 3:55.

Rating: C. Velvet showed some fire here and made me want cake so this one gets some extra points. Abadon has a great look and seems like someone who could be a solid midcard villain. Other than that though, there wasn’t much to see here again, but that is the case with most of the matches on this show.

D3/Ryzin/Faboo Andre vs. Dark Order/Colt Cabana

It’s John Silver/Alex Reynolds for the Order here. Cabana and Andre (I’m assuming it’s Andre because I can’t imagine anyone else on this team being named Faboo) with Colt armdragging him down for a staredown. It’s off to Ryzin but Silver makes a blind tag and gets rolled up for two.

Silver fires off some kicks to send Ryzin into the corner and Reynolds comes in for a snapmare. D3 comes in and Reynolds takes him down in a hurry, meaning a pose can be struck. Cabana gets tagged in but wants nothing to do with a cheap shot in the corner. Instead the Order hits back to back German suplexes to send D3 into the corner for the Flying Apple. The double front flip DDT finishes D3 at 4:09.

Rating: D+. This was a nearly complete squash and that’s what it should be, though Cabana having issues with the Dark Order has been going on for a good while now. I’m not sure where the story is going but it has been going on long enough now that the limited interest that was there in the first place is going away. Cabana vs. Lee down the road doesn’t exactly interest me, but maybe they have something else in mind.

Lee Johnson vs. Ricky Starks

Starks goes with a standing switch but gets pulled down into a quickly broken chinlock. Lee grabs a rollup for two and Starks isn’t sure what’s going on here. Back up and Starks hits a heck of a dropkick but Johnson runs the ropes and hits one of his own. The trip to the floor lets Starks get in a shot on the way back in to take over.

Starks runs the ropes and then falls backwards onto Johnson (with his arms crossed to make it a standing Coffin Drop). Back up and Johnson wins a slugout and grabs a cutter. A springboard missile dropkick gets two on Starks and Taz is sounding a little nervous (Taz: “That was Veda. That was Veda.”). Starks crotches him on top though and grabs the running Dominator (Roshambo) for the pin at 5:20.

Rating: C. Probably the best match of the night so far and I can’t say I’m surprised. Johnson is one of the better of the jobber crew and Starks has been consistent from the day he debuted. I can also go for Taz as his big supporter on commentary, though it would be nice to see that translate to Starks being in a big match on Dynamite. The back injury probably kept that from taking place already, but hopefully it is coming up soon (or at All Out).

Post match, Wardlow comes out and gives Johnson an MJF campaign button, which Johnson wears to avoid more pain.

Tony Donati/Baron Black vs. Santana and Ortiz

Santana throws Black down to start as we talk about the destroyed minivan. An atomic drop into a Backstabber gets Black out of trouble but Santana pulls him into the corner. Donati comes in and gets DDTed in a hurry, followed by a quick suplex. A running elbow in the corner sets up a sitout powerbomb, followed by a kick to the face for the pin at 2:41. That worked.

Lance Archer vs. Jon Cruz/Jesse Sorensen

Jake Roberts is here with Archer. Hold on though as there’s no Cruz, because Archer is carrying him to the ring and then drops him to the floor. The bell rings twice for some reason and Archer blasts Sorensen with a shoulder. Cruz tries to interfere and gets thrown into the corner, setting up some alternating running shoulders. The two manage to kick him down and are promptly planted in a hurry. Cruz is chokeslammed onto Sorensen and for some reason makes the save. The double EBD Claw finishes at 2:39.

Post match Jake teases the DDT but drops Cruz instead.

Alan Angels vs. Billy

That’s Billy….with Austin Gunn of course. Well Austin leaves, but good thing he was there or you might not know who Billy is. Oh and that’s Alan 5 Angels because the Dark Order is still doing the numbers thing. Billy shoves him down a few times to start and a right hand does it again. Angels gets sent hard into the corner a few times and they walk around on the floor for a bit. Back in and Billy hits a Jackhammer for two but Angels is back up with a shotgun dropkick. A release tilt-a-whirl slam plants Angels but he avoids the Fameasser and kicks at the legs. Billy doesn’t mind and hits the cobra clutch slam for the pin at 4:01.

Rating: D+. Of all the Billy matches he has had in AEW where he didn’t do much other than play the hits and not exactly make me want to see his son, this was the latest. Billy still looks good but it isn’t like I’m going to go out of my way to see what he does these days. Good for him for sticking around and staying on Dark, but it isn’t like it’s anything more than nostalgia.

Post match the Dark Order run in for the beatdown until Austin makes the save with a chair. Billy: “I’M AN OLD MAN!”

Butcher and Blade/Lucha Bros vs. SCU/Private Party

Butcher shoves Daniels down to start and hits a running corner clothesline for a bonus. It’s off to Kazarian for some High/Low but Kazarian gets taken into the corner for the choke from Blade. Kazarian takes Blade down into a rollup for two and it’s off to Kassidy. A slingshot hilo gets two on Blade but Fenix comes in to take Kassidy down. Kassidy is back up with a hurricanrana so it’s Pentagon and Quen coming in.

Quen cranks on the arm and brings Daniels back in as the fast tags begin. A top rope stomp to the arm gets two on Pentagon and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Pentagon hits a Sling Blade so Blade can come back in to hammer on Kassidy. Butcher whips Kassidy hard into the corner and Pentagon adds the loud chop against the ropes. Fenix’s near Muta Lock doesn’t last long and the good guys are drawn in so Butcher can choke on the ropes.

Fenix superkicks Blade by mistake though and the hot tag brings in Quen to clean house. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Fenix trades kicks to the head with Quen until they’re both down. Daniels Rock Bottoms Pentagon and looks to set up the BME but Fenix breaks it up in a hurry. Private Party hit stereo dives onto Pentagon and Butcher. The Fear Factor plants Daniels with Kazarian making a save and it’s the suplex onto Blade’s knees to pin Daniels at 10:54.

Rating: C. The star power and time helped this one a bit though there isn’t much going on here other than a fast paced ending. That’s the case with most of these bigger Dark matches, but at the same time it’s nice to have something a little more serious after an hour and twenty minutes of squashes. Daniels taking the pin makes sense too, as it’s not like SCU needs any wins to be a big deal around here.

Post match the Bros aren’t happy Butcher and Blade got the pin.

Quick preview for Saturday’s Dynamite wraps us up.

Overall Rating: D+. It isn’t a bad show but at the same time there is only so much that can be said about a show that comes and goes like this with nothing of note. The wrestling was ok at best and I’m not going to remember anything that happened on it next week. The longer times seem to be the new norm and as annoying as that is, it’s what AEW loves to do and that’s the kind of thing you have to like if you’re going to be around here.

Results

Kip Sabian b. Michael Nakazawa – Deathly Hallows

Sonny Kiss/Joey Janela b. Frank Stone/Shawn Dean – Splits splash to Dean

Shawn Spears b. Will Hobbs – Death Valley Driver

Hybrid 2 b. Initiative – 630 to Avalon

Abadon b. Red Velvet – Cemetery Walk

Colt Cabana/Dark Order b. Ryzin/D3/Faboo Andre – Double front flip DDT to D3

Ricky Starks b. Lee Johnson – Roshambo

Santana and Ortiz b. Tony Donati/Baron Black – Kick to Donati’s face

Lance Archer b. Jon Cruz/Jesse Sorensen – Double EBD Claw

Billy b. Alan Angels – Cobra clutch

Butcher and Blade/Lucha Bros b. SCU/Private Party – Suplex onto Blade’s knees to Daniels

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