Hell In A Cell 2022: That Hurts Just Looking At It

Hell In A Cell 2022
Date: June 5, 2022
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole

It’s time for one of the big gimmick shows and I think you know what is headlining. However, things have changed a bit at the last minute, as Cody Rhodes has suffered a torn pectoral muscle, meaning his match against Seth Rollins will be more than a bit different. The match is still on and inside the Cell, but I’m not sure how much Rhodes can do. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at some of the history of the Cell before moving on to talk about almost every match on the card.

We recap Bianca Belair defending the Raw Women’s Title against Asuka and Becky Lynch. Belair won the title from Lynch at Wrestlemania but Asuka then returned and wanted into the title picture. Now Lynch has jumped back in as well, meaning the triple threat is the only option.

Raw Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch

Belair is defending and it’s Becky dropping to the floor to start. Belair tells Asuka to bring it so it’s a clothesline to take her down early on. Lynch takes Asuka’s place so Belair slams her off the top and looks rather pleased. Asuka comes back in to clean house though and Becky is down again. That lets Asuka go up but Becky Iconoclasms her down onto Belair for two each in a smart move.

A Hennig necksnap gets two on Belair and Lynch kicks away at Asuka. The middle rope Fameasser knocks Belair out of the ropes for two and the top rope legdrop gets the same, with Asuka making the save this time. Asuka wins a strike off with Lynch and snaps off a German suplex for a bonus. There’s the running hip attack for two but the Asuka Lock is countered into a rollup for two.

The Disarm-Her is broken up but so is Belair’s KOD. Belair hammers away at both of them in the corner at the same time and the handspring moonsault gets a double two. With that not working, Belair puts Asuka on top but has to kick Asuka away. Belair moonsaults over Asuka but gets caught in a Codebreaker, with Becky taking one of her own. The double hip attack gets two each so Asuka ankle locks both of them at once.

That’s broken up as well so it’s Belair putting Asuka down on the floor, only to walk into the Manhandle Slam from Lynch. Asuka makes a diving save and everyone is down. Back up and Asuka misses the hip attack, allowing Belair to grab the Disarm-Her in the ropes. Belair breaks that up with the KOD attempt but gets knocked out to the floor. The Asuka Lock has Lynch in trouble but Belair comes in off the top with…..something that doesn’t seem to have been timed right. The hold is broken up anyway and Belair is sent into the buckle. Lynch Manhandle Slams Asuka so Belair is right there to steal the pin and retain at 18:16.

Rating: B. This was the action packed match that you would have expected and it worked out rather well. The ending doesn’t surprise me at all as Asuka seemed to be there to take the fall so Lynch and Belair can continue to look strong on the way to whenever their next showdown may be. It might not have been a classic, but this was the best choice for a hot opener that they had.

Cedric Alexander tries to talk his way onto MVP’s good side but MVP insists that the Hurt Business is done.

We recap MVP/Omos vs. Bobby Lashley, which is all about Lashley wanting to get his hands on MVP for good. This has involved three Omos vs. Lashley matches and adding MVP is the st they can do for some fresh blood.

MVP/Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

MVP starts but immediately hands it off to Omos for the big staredown. Lashley slugs away but isn’t willing to go for a test of strength. Instead, Lashley kicks him down again but Omos drops him with a few shots. Now MVP will come in to kick away but MVP goes after the eyes. Omos comes back in but Lashley knocks MVP to the floor and kicks Omos down. A suplex attempt is countered into a gordbuster though and Omos drops him face first onto the turnbuckle.

There’s a running boot to Lashley and they head outside, with Omos awkwardly driving him through the barricade. Back in and MVP gets one before pounding away at the downed Lashley. A quick spear hits MVP but Omos makes the save. Cue Cedric Alexander for a failed interference attempt on Omos, who shoves him to the floor. Another spear cuts Omos down and the Hurt Lock finishes MVP at 8:17.

Rating: C. This could have been on any given edition of Raw and I don’t think that is much of a surprise. Lashley has now run through both of them and there is little more to do, unless you want to have Lashley crush MVP as well. I would hope not as it is time to move on, but at least they have made Lashley look like a giant slayer.

Post match Lashley is fired up and holds up a fan’s WWE Title. Lashley vs. Reigns would be a fine title match, assuming Reigns ever bothers to show up.

Commentary confirms Cody Rhodes’ torn pectoral muscle but he will be in the Cell against Seth Rollins anyway.

Kevin Owens vs. Ezekiel

Owens has been going nuts in an attempt to prove that Ezekiel is really Elias. How this match will help him accomplish that isn’t entirely clear. Owens yells to start so Ezekiel hits a jumping knee and a top rope elbow for a very early two. That sends Owens outside so Ezekiel beats him up and then sends him into the announcers’ table. A posting cuts Ezekiel of though and it’s a backsplash for two back inside. The middle rope moonsault gives Owens the same and frustration is setting in. Owens: “THAT’S ELIAS!!!”

The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by some choking, with more screaming, on the ropes. Back up and Ezekiel slugs away, only to get caught in a tornado DDT for two. The Swanton hits knees though and Ezekiel gets a needed breather. Ezekiel unloads in the corner and hits some running splashes, followed by a spinebuster for two. The pop up sitout powerbomb gives Owens two of his own and now he wants Ezekiel to admit it. That earns Owens another knee but this time Owens catches him on top. A superkick into the Cannonball sets up the Stunner to give Owens the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C. Ezekiel has been having some better matches and this was his best yet, but I’m not sure why you would have Owens win clean here. It doesn’t help Owens prove Ezekiel’s identity but it takes away a lot of Ezekiel’s momentum. This doesn’t seem to be the most logical way to go, but maybe they have some kind of twist coming in the whole thing.

Quick recap of Judgment Day vs. AJ Styles/Finn Balor/Liv Morgan. The team wants Styles to join but he keeps saying no, so destruction has been promised.

Judgment Day vs. Liv Morgan/AJ Styles/Finn Balor

It’s a big showdown and brawl to start with Morgan hurricanranaing Ripley into the corner. Back up and Ripley hits a headbutt, setting up a delayed vertical suplex. Morgan is back up with a middle rope dropkick and it’s off to Styles vs. Priest for a change. A Pele kick rocks Priest so Balor comes in to start on the arm. Priest manages to get in a cheap shot though and Balor is sent outside, with Edge sending him into various objects.

Back in and a hard whip into the corner rocks Balor again. A flapjack cuts off the hot tag attempt and it’s Priest grabbing the chinlock. That’s broken up and Balor hits a Pele, allowing the hot tag to Styles. House is cleaned and the Phenomenal Forearm drops Edge but Priest breaks up the pin. Morgan and Ripley come back in with the former grabbing another hurricanrana. A crucifix bomb gives Morgan two but she has to escape Riptide and hands it back to Balor.

Everything breaks down again and Balor/Styles hit stereo slingshot dives. Back in and Ripley breaks up the Coup de Grace but Styles is back in with the Phenomenal Forearm to Priest. Edge posts Styles but Balor is back up with the Sling Blade. There’s the shotgun dropkick in the corner as a trainer can be seen checking on Styles. Ripley’s distraction breaks up the Coup de Grace so Morgan cuts her off, only to have Edge spear Balor down for the pin at 16:04.

Rating: B-. Good enough match here, though this feud needs to end as Judgment Day needs to move on to someone else. I’m not sure who that is, but they have soundly beaten Styles and company and need to go do something else. Maybe someone jumps onto the team tomorrow, but it isn’t exactly an interesting story this time around as Judgment Day has dominated everything they do against Styles.

Bobby Lashley comes up to Cedric Alexander in the back and asks what that was. Alexander says that was him doing something for himself, which Lashley can understand. Just don’t do that again.

We recap Madcap Moss vs. Happy Corbin. The team split up after Wrestlemania and Corbin put Moss on the shelf. Moss then came back a lot more serious and tonight it’s about revenge.

Happy Corbin vs. Madcap Moss

No Holds Barred. Moss doesn’t waste time in clotheslining Corbin outside and they’re quickly up by the entrance. That doesn’t last long as they’re right back in the ring, with Moss hitting another clothesline to send Corbin back to the floor. Moss grabs a chair but Corbin knocks him down, only to have Moss throw another chair at him. Corbin knocks him down again and loads up a chair back inside, only to be drop toeholded face first into said chair.

The Punch Line is broken up though and Corbin gets two off of Deep Six. Corbin puts a chair in the corner and of course is sent face first into it, allowing Moss to start chairing him down for a change. Moss knocks him outside but a charge is cut off with a chop block. The chair is wrapped around Moss’ neck and sent into the announcers’ table to knock him even sillier. Back in and the steps are placed in the corner, with Corbin fall away slammed into them. The Punch Line connects and Moss Pillmanizes Corbin’s neck with the steps for the pin at 12:04.

Rating: C. Moss’ new look and attitude make all the difference in the world for him as I could take him somewhat seriously. I don’t know how high of a ceiling he might have but this is a lot better than whatever he was doing before. Either way, this feud needs to be done, as there is no reason for Moss to beat Corbin again. That ending should write Corbin off for the time being, but it probably won’t.

Corbin is stretchered out.

US Title: Theory vs. Mustafa Ali

Theory is defending and hometown boy Ali gets a big special entrance. An armdrag sends Theory outside and there’s the big high crossbody to take him down again. Ali gets posted to put him in trouble but he manages a drop toehold to send Theory into the buckle. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Ali is back up with a spinwheel kick.

Ali’s rolling neckbreaker drops Theory again but he’s fine enough to hit a springboard Spanish Fly for two of his own. Ali is able to knock him down again and heads up top, only to get crotched. A Town Down is countered into an STF but Theory makes the rope. The tornado DDT plants Theory again but the 450 misses, allowing Theory to chop block the already banged up knee. A Town Down retains the title at 10:19.

Rating: C+. I knew Ali was losing his big hometown title shot, you knew Ali was losing his big hometown title shot and the world knew Ali was losing his big hometown title shot. WWE isn’t going to give the fans that kind of feel good moment, especially when Ali has more punishment to receive. This was the biggest layup on the show and that is one of the things WWE might want to work on.

We recap Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins inside the Cell.

Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins

Inside the Cell and Cody has a torn pectoral muscle. Rollins cranks up the evil by coming out in Dusty Rhodes polka dots but Cody’s chest steals the show, because it looks AWFUL, making him seem all the nuttier for being out there. Cody starts firing off the left hands and manages a Disaster Kick, setting up a not so great Cody Cutter. The Figure Four goes on but Rollins manages to reach underneath the ring and grab a tool box. That doesn’t work so it’s a kendo stick to the bad arm to break things up.

Rollins stabs him in the chest with the stick and then knocks Cody into the Cell. Cody manages a whip of his own but can barely follow up. The steps off the shoulder rocks Cody again so Rollins puts on Cody’s jacket. He also grabs the weightlifting belt to beat on Rhodes before setting up the table. The fans chant THANK YOU ROLLINS as he steps on the bad arm in the corner. Cody can’t powerbomb him through the table but he can avoid the frog splash through the table, leaving Rollins down.

With nothing else working, Rhodes pulls out a bullrope with a cowbell so Rollins is confused. Rhodes ties one end around his wrist and Rollins does the same, giving us an impromptu bullrope match. Cody takes him down and hits a superkick, setting up the cowbell to the head for two. Rollins gets in another shot and unhooks the rope, allowing him to set up a table. A one armed Cross Rhodes gives Cody a quick two but the arm gives out on a powerbomb attempt.

Rollins cranks on the arm and toss powerbombs Cody through the table for two. It’s sledgehammer time but Cody kicks it away and hits a Pedigree for two of his own. Cody grabs the hammer but gets caught with the Stomp for two more. Another Stomp is countered into Cross Rhodes from Rollins but Cody pops up and hits one of his own for the double knockdown. They both go for the hammer but Cody switches to back to back Cross Rhodes. Now Rhodes picks up the hammer and hits a running shot for the pin at 24:18.

Rating: B+. That’s on a heck of a sliding scale as Cody was almost literally fighting with one arm. Having him win, especially before he goes off for surgery that might have him missing all the way through the Rumble, is quite the choice. It might be a feel good moment, but Rollins is going to need some time to recover from that kind of a loss. Cody looked like an absolute star and points for an amazing effort, but that arm was about as gruesome as you could get and it was hard to watch at times.

Overall Rating: B. Like many WWE pay per views, you don’t need to see much on the show, but it could have been worse. WWE continues to be a lot easier to watch when they don’t have the storyline nonsense eating away at your sanity and that was the case here. Most of the matches are ok to good, with the opener and main event being worth a look. This was the definition of a C level pay per view that did pretty well, but it had such a lame build on the way here that it was really hard to get excited for anything. Hopefully they can move on now, because these feuds are WAY past their expiration dates.

Results
Bianca Belair b. Asuka and Becky Lynch – Manhandle Slam to Asuka
Bobby Lashley b. Omos/MVP – Hurt Lock to MVP
Kevin Owens b. Ezekiel – Stunner
Judgment Day b. Finn Balor/AJ Styles/Liv Morgan – Spear to Balor
Madcap Moss b. Happy Corbin – Moss Pillmanized Corbin’s neck
Theory b. Mustafa Ali – A Town Down
Cody Rhodes b. Seth Rollins – Sledgehammer to the face

 

 

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