Smackdown – July 1, 2022: Nope.

Smackdown
Date: July 1, 2022
Location: Footprint Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Money in the Bank and that means we probably need a lot of talk about the percentages of wrestlers who successfully cash in. I for one could go for some good old statistics to make me care about the show, as it isn’t like there is much else to say. Maybe they can surprise us though. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The participants in the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match are on ladders in the ring (save for Omos) and talk about how they want to win on Saturday. It means they can cash in, with Seth Rollins saying Summerslam sounds like a good idea. Sami Zayn says he’ll win and keep the contract in the Bloodline’s house. MVP laughs off the idea of anyone but Omos winning and there is no one who can do anything to stop them. Sheamus wants to beat Brock Lesnar, though Drew McIntyre says he has already done it.

Cue Miz (Drew: “The frickin MIZ?”) to says he is a two time Mr. Money in the Bank winner and deserves to be in the match. Cue Ezekiel to say what you would expect, followed by Happy Corbin doing the same. Madcap Moss joins in and here is Adam Pearce to make a battle royal.

Battle Royal

Omos, Ezekiel, Madcap Moss, Happy Corbin, Miz, Sheamus, Seth Rollins, Drew McIntyre, Riddle

Not just a battle royal, but a GOOD OLD FASHIONED battle royal. It’s a brawl to start with no one being able to do much with anyone. Omos tosses Ezekiel and does the same to Moss, followed by Miz, leaving Corbin and those already qualified. McIntyre and Omos have their slugout, which goes badly for McIntyre as he gets thrown down. Sheamus gets tossed into the corner as well and Rollins eliminates himself in a smart move, only to have Riddle go outside (not eliminated) and hit an RKO on the floor. Everyone gets rid of Omos and we take a break.

Back with the villains taking over on Riddle and McIntyre, which lasts as long as you might expect until Sheamus hits the forearms to Sami’s chest. Riddle is back with a Bro To Sleep to Sheamus, followed by the snap powerslam (minus some of the snap). Back up and Sheamus knees Riddle out, leaving us with Sheamus, Sami, Corbin and McIntyre. Sami Helluva Kicks Sheamus by mistake but Sheamus is fine enough to Claymore McIntyre.

Now it’s McIntyre getting to clean house, though he doesn’t actually eliminate anyone. With Corbin on the ground (not eliminated, meaning he’s winning), McIntyre hits the Futureshock on Sheamus. Sami comes back and gets Claymored, setting up the elimination. Sheamus is almost dumped but it’s Corbin coming back in to toss McIntyre and Sheamus at the same time for the win at 15:25.

Rating: C-. What else is there to say about a match like this? It didn’t have any stakes and Corbin was telegraphed as the winner as soon as he was the only one not in the ladder match left. It isn’t an interesting match and it wasn’t that good, but at least it filled up the first half hour of the show.

Corbin is happy with his win but has nothing to be said about Pat McAfee.

Video on Natalya vs. Ronda Rousey, mainly focusing on last week’s showdown and exchange of insults.

Natalya laughs off Ronda Rousey’s threats and mocks Rousey’s movie career. Now she is going to make Rousey tap out and become the two time Smackdown Women’s Champion.

New Day vs. Viking Raiders

Before the match, Kofi says it’s great to be in Phoenix in June. Woods: “Kofi it’s not June anymore.” Kofi: “JU-LYING!” That somehow wins him $5 but it’s time to get serious. Last week the Vikings were back and attacked them, so get out here right now and get your Asgards kicked. The team is officially billed as The New Vicious Viking Raiders, just to hammer in the idea. It’s a brawl before the bell and New Day is left laying after a bunch of shield shots. No match.

Happy Corbin, Ezekiel, Miz and Madcap Moss are arguing over who should be in the Money in the Bank ladder match. Miz: “I WAS ON THE TODAY SHOW THIS MORNING!” Moss: “I’m just happy to be here.” As Miz looks appalled by that statement, the four way for the spot is announced for later, making the entire first half hour of this show a waste of time.

Asuka/Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss vs. Shotzi/Raquel Rodriguez/Lacey Evans

Becky Lynch comes out to join commentary as Asuka shoves Shotzi into the corner to start. Evans comes in to take Asuka into the corner and there’s the slingshot Bronco Buster. A sunset flip slows Rodriguez down so Bliss comes in for a change. Rodriguez splashes her in the corner to cut that off, followed by a running shoulder to drop her again.

Liv comes in and gets taken down in the corner by Shotzi. That sets off the parade of flips and dives as the Raw women stand tall as we take a break. Back with Bliss dropkicking Rodriguez as Cole tries to talk to Lynch and McAfee actually calls the match. Shotzi takes over on Bliss and grabs….I think a Boston crab, but Bliss escapes.

Bliss escapes and brings in Asuka, who seems to no sell and enziguri and grabs the ankle lock. That’s broken up and Asuka hits the hip attack for two. Another hip attack misses in the ropes so Liv tags herself in and hits the Codebreaker, with Rodriguez having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Oblivion finishes Shotzi at 13:18.

Rating: D+. This is the kind of match that makes me loathe Money in the Bank season. This was the better part of fifteen minutes for the sake of building momentum towards a match that has nothing to do with pinning each other. The teams will be fighting each other tomorrow and absolutely none of this will matter. Somehow this is all WWE does for the ladder matches and it’s an even bigger waste of time every year.

Sonya Deville asks Adam Pearce about the handicap match last week and has FILED AN OFFICIAL COMPLAINT. Deville slaps him in the face and leaves. I said an audible “oh good grief” on that one as this dumb power struggle story continues.

And now, a GAME SHOW between the Usos and the Street Profits, with Kayla Braxton presiding. This means Braxton asks questions, such as are the Usos scared to lose. They aren’t scared because they run all of the shows but the Profits say the Usos just run to the grocery store for Roman Reigns.

As for the Profits, it has been a year and half since they have been champs, and now there are rumors they aren’t getting along. Ford: “Where did you hear that?” Dawkins: “Dirtsheets?” Profits: “Probably.” Ford talks about the Usos’ family, prompting the Usos to say “respect”. They talk about legacy, trash talk each other and steal the other team’s catchphrases before staring each other down. I was promised a game show here but there was no game show to be found.

Max Dupri is ready for his Maximum Male Models showcase.

And now, Max Dupri for the debut of his models. Dupri introduces the models, starting with ma.çè (pronounced “Mah-Say”), yes spelled that way and formerly known as Mace), with Dupri explaining how physically perfect his physique is. Next up is the former Mansoor, but now known as Man.soor (with the letters having symbols over them that I don’t know how to type). Pronounced “Man-Swah”, he has a fanny pack around his neck, drawing in some Michael Hayes comparisons. Believe it or not, McAfee is a huge fan and Cole is trying not to break. For a lower midcard gimmick, I’ve certainly seen worse.

Ronda Rousey reminds us that her daughter is nine months old instead of ten like Natalya said. Oh and she’ll make Natalya tap tomorrow. Keeping this short and sweet is a good idea.

Money In The Bank rundown.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Happy Corbin vs. Miz vs. Madcap Moss vs. Ezekiel

It’s a brawl to start with neither being able to do much. Ezekiel and Moss are left alone with the former hitting a slam but getting elbowed in the jaw. With Ezekiel on the floor, Corbin comes back in to clean house, only to have Miz break it up. Everyone else is on the floor with Miz missing a charge and being sent into the announcers’ table. Corbin sends Moss into the steps and chokeslams Ezekiel onto the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Corbin in control but Moss is back with the Punchline for two as Ezekiel makes a save.

Ezekiel’s middle rope crossbody is countered into a fall away slam but Miz is there with the running knee to Moss. Deep Six cuts Miz off for two more and Corbin is frustrated. Ezekiel is back up to clean house until he has to break out of Corbin’s chokeslam attempt. A jumping knee rocks Corbin and there’s a spinebuster to Moss. Miz gets sent into the corner but comes back with the Skull Crushing Finale for two as Corbin makes the save. Corbin hits End of Days on Miz but takes too long looking at McAfee, allowing Moss to send him into the post and steal the pin on Miz at 10:34.

Rating: C. So yes, the entire first half hour of this show was a TOTAL WASTE OF TIME because it meant absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things. That is a very Money in the Bank season match and I can’t say I’m the slightest bit surprised. The ending probably helps set up McAfee vs. Corbin, which is going to be fun later in the month, but it would have been nice to do something a bit more important for this show.

McAfee mocks Corbin to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Nope. This was the kind of show that I can’t stand and yet here it was with every one of the problems that you would expect from a show like this one. It felt like they were trying to fill in the two hours that they had here with stuff that either meant nothing or wasn’t good enough to make a more important show. It’s the reason why I can’t stand this time of year in WWE and I’m not surprised it was any worse this time around.

Results
Happy Corbin won a battle royal last eliminating Drew McIntyre and Sheamus
Asuka/Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss b. Raquel Rodriguez/Lacey Evans/Shotzi – Oblivion to Shotzi
Madcap Moss b. Ezekiel, Happy Corbin and Miz – End of Days to Miz

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.