Collision – August 12, 2023: That’s How It Should Be

Collision
Date: August 12, 2023
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, Coliseum
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Caprice Coleman

We are about two weeks away from All In and the card has mostly started to come together. There are a lot of things that still need to be set up, so this week could be a mixture of new stuff plus building up what is already announced. On top of that, we also have the Trios Titles on the line with CM Punk/FTR challenging the House of Black. Let’s get to it.

Here is Dynamite if you need a recap.

Acclaimed, Christian Cage and Luchasaurus, FTR and CM Punk are all ready.

Opening sequence.

Tony Schiavone brings out Ricky Starks for a chat. Last week, Starks whipped Ricky Steamboat with a belt (which he has with him, because he’s a thief too) and as a result, he has been suspended from wrestling for thirty days. Starks doesn’t care because it had to be done. Steamboat did something wrong and had to be punished, so no it isn’t his fault. Instead, he has a manager’s license for the next thirty days because this is his house. CM Punk got the win last week but he isn’t bulletproof. Next week, the war begins.

Video on FTR vs. the Young Bucks.

Acclaimed vs. Iron Savages

Max does his rap but Bowens doesn’t have a daddy to scissor. The Savages on the other hand have Jacked Jameson with them. Bronson powers out of Bowens’ headlock so Bowens fires off some right hands in the corner. Caster comes in to hammer on Bronson before it’s off to Bounder. For some reason Caster tries a fireman’s carry, which goes rather badly. Bowens comes back in and kicks away but gets picked up, with Caster being pulled out of the air at the same time. The double drop sends us to an early break.

Back with Caster missing the top rope splash so Bowens can come back in to clean house. Boulder launches Bowens up for a faceplant though and a double spinebuster gets two. The electric chair splash is loaded up but Caster makes the save with a missile dropkick. Caster AA’s Boulder and Jameson gets Scissor Me Timbers. Stereo Fameassers finish for the Acclaimed at 8:47.

Rating: C+. The Savages are an intimidating looking power team and they made for some good opponents for the Acclaimed. With Billy Gunn gone, it would be nice to see Acclaimed getting back into the Tag Team Title hunt as it isn’t like they have anything else going on at the moment. Now can they please stop acting like Billy Gunn is dead?

Post match the Acclaimed say they’re back to being a two man team and they’ll be wrestling again on Dynamite. Gunn gets a tribute as well.

Bullet Club Gold says they’re on fire this week and the Gunns are ready to beat up the Young Bucks on Dynamite. Don’t bring superkicks to a gun fight.

Video on Adam Cole and/vs. MJF.

Mercedes Martinez/Diamante vs. Willow Nightingale/Kris Statlander

Statlander gets distracted by Martinez to start but manages to kick Diamante in the head anyway. Diamante snaps off a headscissors but it’s Nightingale coming in for a quick splash. The Pounds is blocked though and we get the Paradise Lock, allowing the villains to pose before hitting the double dropkick.

We take a break and come back with Nightingale fighting her way out of trouble. A spinebuster is enough to bring Statlander back in to clean house, including dropkicks all around. Nightingale comes back in but the villains get knocked outside. With Nightingale and Statlander outside, Martinez Razor’s Edge tosses Diamante onto them (and she almost left it short).

Back in and Nightingale Pounces Martinez but gets Sliced Breaded by Diamante. Statlander hits a fisherman’s driver on Diamante but gets decked by Martinez. Nightingale sits down on a sunset flip but Martinez turns her over and gets the pin (with an assist from Diamante) at 8:45.

Rating: C+. I get why it needed to be done but it’s annoying to see Nightingale take another pin. You don’t have Statlander lose in a tag match but hopefully this sets up Martinez as a challenger. She would be someone who can give Statlander a heck of a fight and that’s exactly what she needs.

Toni Storm is glad to have Saraya in the Women’s Title match at All In because they can keep things straight. Now if the interviewer will stop messing with Storm when she’s in a vulnerable state, things will be great. Storm promises to have her escorted out and throws a shoe.

Samoa Joe vs. Andrew Everett

Joe’s ROH TV Title isn’t on the line and he hammers Everett down in the corner. There’s the enziguri but Everett tries to flip around. That doesn’t work for Joe, who chokes him out at 1:17.

Post match Joe calls out CM Punk again, this time referring to him as a coward. Joe even gave Punk the courtesy of telling him what would happen but now it is time to convince him.

All In rundown.

Here are Christian Cage and Luchasaurus for a chat. Cage calls this the biggest family reunion he has ever been a part of, as everyone in North Carolina is related. North Carolina has its fair share of second bests, like Michael Jordan compared to LeBron James and Ric Flair compared to himself. No one respects him, but the one who disrespects him the most is Darby Allin.

Now Allin already says that he is half dead inside, but if he keeps coming after Cage’s TNT Title, he’ll make up the other half. Cue Arn Anderson with his son Brock (Arn: “This is Greensboro, North Carolina, they know us around here.”) and Arn reminds Cage that Luchasaurus is the REAL champion. Cage tells him to come in here right now but Arn says if this was twenty years ago, he’d hit the spinebuster and win the title. For now though, we’ll do this instead.

TNT Title: Luchasaurus vs. Brock Anderson

Luchasaurus is defending and he wastes no time in knocking Brock to the floor. A belly to back drop puts Brock down again and we take a break. Back with Luchasaurus hitting a chokeslam and a clothesline to the back of the head for the pin at 5:22. Not enough shown to rate but it was a squash.

Post match Darby Allin runs in for the save with the skateboard. Allin threatens to do something rather painful with the skateboard and then challenges Christian for a match next week. Cage is in, so Allin promises to beat them both.

Here is Powerhouse Hobbs for a chat. Last week, an opportunity presented itself for All Out. Hobbs has not found any peace for the last few months, so he went back home and found the one thing that means something to him: The Book Of Hobbs (which he has in his hands). The next chapter is called Redemption, so he wants the Redeemer here right now. Cue Miro, but QTV jumps him on the way. Hobbs doesn’t seem to have expected them, but Miro beats them down anyway. That leaves Hobbs to hit the spinebuster on Miro and leave him laying, complete with book (at least he has something to read).

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Jim Ross comes out to call the main event.

Trios Titles: CM Punk/FTR vs. House Of Black

The House, with Julia Hart, is defending. Punk and Matthews start things off and yes the fans are split again. A headlock doesn’t get Punk very far so it’s off to Cash for a headlock takeover. That’s broken up and they get to stare at each other for a bit. Some arm cranking works a bit better so it’s off to Harwood for the snap suplex. A legdrop gets two and it’s off to King for the power.

Harwood chops away at him and adds a basement dropkick. Punk goes up top but dives over King to clothesline Murphy. It’s back to Punk vs. black and they sit down to look at each other but everything breaks down. The three way slugout takes us to a break and we come back with Black knocking Harwood down and grabbing the chinlock. Harwood fights up but it’s back to King to take care of that.

Black misses the big spinning kick to the head and the DDT plants him. Punk gets the hot tag to pick up the pace as JR gives his usual lament about the DDT not finishing anyone. Matthews slips out of the GTS so Punk drops him again, but a Hart distraction lets Black get in the crotching. King hits a heck of a Cannonball to Punk in the corner and we take another break. Back again with Punk still in trouble as Matthews grabs the chinlock. Punk fights up and hits a quick GTS, allowing the tag off to Wheeler to pick up the pace.

Everything breaks down and the House is knocked outside, leaving Wheeler to hit a big dive. Back in and King suplexes FTR down but they manage to superplex King instead. Punk’s top rope elbow gets two and we need a breather. Harwood brainbusters Matthews and black and Punk kick each other in the head to leave everyone down. A top rope headbutt hits King….but here is Samoa Joe to choke Punk out. That and a Hart distraction lets King hit a lariat to retain the titles at 26:55.

Rating: B. They didn’t have much of another option for the finish as they don’t want to change the titles and you don’t want Punk taking a fall. Joe more or less said he was going to mess with Punk and this is as good of a way as you’re going to get to cover both of those things. The action was good as well and it made for the big fight feel, so this worked as a main event.

Overall Rating: B. Rather solid show up and down here, with matches that worked, both long and short. They pushed some things towards All In and All Out and that’s exactly what they needed to do. There was nothing on here that was an instant classic or anything close to it, but this was a very nice way to spend two hours on a Saturday night.

Results
Acclaimed b. Iron Savages – Fameasser to Bronson
Diamante/Mercedes Martinez b. Willow Nightingale/Kris Statlander – Assisted sunset flip to Nightingale
Samoa Joe b. Andrew Everett – Koquina Clutch
Luchasaurus b. Brock Anderson – Clothesline to the back of the head
House Of Black b. CM Punk/FTR – Lariat to Harwood

 

 

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