Impact Wrestling – August 31, 2023: There’s A Lot To Do

Impact Wrestling
Date: August 31, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re done with Emergence and Bound For Glory is starting to appear over the horizon. Before we get there though, we have Victory Road and Impact 1000 to cover and at least one of those shows has some special names already announced. Tonight will probably see some more names and matches set for those shows, while we also get the Emergence fallout. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Emergence recap.

Knockouts Battle Royal

Gisele Shaw, Killer Kelly, KiLynn King, Courtney Rush, Masha Slamovich, Jody Threat, Alisha Edwards, Vanna Black, Savannah Evans, Jessicka

For the Knockouts Title shot and they start fast with the brawling around the ring. Edwards and Black tease an early alliance but get beaten up by the Death Dollz. MK Ultra gets rid of Black for the first elimination and Evans/Shaw toss Kelly and Slamovich. Rush is out as well, with Shaw going out around the same time.

Jessicka is eliminated as well (onto the ramp, which counts as the floor) and Evans follows, leaving us with King and Threat to slug it out. King Neutralizes Threat but the King’s Curse is countered, allowing Threat to hit a German suplex. Then Alisha comes in to eliminate both of them because she was never eliminated (erg) for the win at 7:07.

Rating: C-. Not much of a battle royal here with the always annoying “oh, you forgot this one” ending. Edwards getting the short term title shot is fine as it isn’t like Victory Road is the place for some kind of title showdown. That being said, I don’t remember the last time Impact held a traditional battle royal and that helps this feel so much more fresh.

We look at Steve Maclin returning at Emergence and going after Josh Alexander’s recently repaired tricep, allowing Moose to beat Alexander.

Alexander takes blame for the loss and apologizes to the Motor City Machine Guns. He wants the World Title back and Alex Shelley doesn’t like Alexander touching the belt. Shelley tells him to earn a shot so Shelley can show him he’s not a transitional champion. That works for Alexander, so here are the Rascalz to mock the Guns, with a singles match set for tonight.

Alisha Edwards celebrates with Eddie Edwards and declares themselves the power couple of Impact. Oh and she’ll win the title.

Crazzy Steve vs. Mike Bailey

Steve wears a mask to the ring and has a much creepier entrance, which leaves Tom Hannifan a little disturbed. Steve goes for the eyes to start and that’s a DQ at 16 seconds.

Post match Steve goes after the referee before whipping out a fork to go for Bailey’s eyes again. Cue Black Taurus to try and calm Steve down but Steve goes after Taurus’ eyes as well. Steve goes for security’s eyes as well. This was more good stuff from Steve.

Brian Myers brags about Moose and Eddie Edwards winning at Emergence. They’re ready for a six man tag tonight. Bully Ray comes in to tell Eddie to leave because they have a problem with PCO. Myers: “No, you have a problem with PCO.” With Moose and Myers gone, PCO can be heard screaming in the background.

Will Ospreay will be at Turning Point and Bound For Glory.

PCO almost catches up to Bully Ray, who catches him in a door. PCO shouts about how Ray tried to kill him, but Ray calls him Carl and says he wants the man back, not the monster.

Eric Young vs. Kon

No Deaner after an attack at Emergence. Young knocks him into the corner and hammers away. A spinebuster plants Young for two and Kon gets to slowly pound away. Back up and Young scores with some right hands, only to be tossed out to the floor in a big crash as we take a break. We come back with Kon grabbing a nerve hold but Young fights up again. Kon misses a charge in the corner and Young hits the Death Valley Driver for two.

Young’s top rope elbow gets the same but the piledriver is easily blocked. The full nelson slam gives Kon two but Young clotheslines him to the floor, setting up the big dive. There’s a piledriver on the floor to drop Kon again, only to have him beat the count at nine (erg). Back in and Young hits another piledriver for the pin at 13:01.

Rating: C. It really is amazing how much easier the Design is to take when Deaner isn’t involved. Kon isn’t much better and is a rather generic big guy but he doesn’t have the bad things that drag Deaner down. This was a passable match, even if Young didn’t do much other than punch for the first half.

Lio Rush doesn’t know why Chris Sabin wants another shot at him. Maybe his brain is still scrambled, but pick the time. Kushida comes up with his Ultimate X and says Victory Road.

Jordynne Grace is coming back at Victory Road.

Deonna Purrazzo is upset at her loss to Trinity at Emergence but she has faced setbacks before. She finds it interesting that Grace is only coming back now, but maybe it’s because she lost to Purrazzo so many times. The challenge is on for Victory Road.

Zachary Wentz vs. Chris Sabin

Trey Miguel and Alex Shelley are here too. Sabin sends him outside to start and Miguel offers some advice. Back in and some armdrags into an armbar have Wentz in more trouble. A boot scrape to the eyes cuts off a comeback attempt and Sabin stays on the arm. Wentz’s arm is sent into the buckle but he’s able to send Sabin outside for a change. There’s the big dive to take Sabin down again and we take a break.

Back with Wentz kicking him in the chest for two and grabbing an armbar/neck crank. The rope gets Sabin out of trouble and a straitjacket suplex rocks Wentz again. There’s the tornado DDT for two but Wentz kicks him in the back of the head. A half nelson slam gives Wentz two and a handspring knee drops Sabin again. That doesn’t last long as Sabin is back up with a knee and they’re both down (this lasts a bit longer). Sabin pulls him into an STF but the other two get in a fight on the floor. Sabin sends Wentz outside for a suicide dive onto both Rascalz. The Cradle Shock finishes for Sabin at 14:03.

Rating: B-. I’m a bit surprised by the new champ losing, though getting beaten by Sabin is hardly a terrible upset. This should set the Guns up for a Tag Team Title shot though I’d hope they don’t win them back that fast. Other than that, you had a nice match here and it shouldn’t be a surprise given who was in there.

Post match Miguel runs in for a cheap shot on Sabin, allowing the Rascalz to bail.

We look at the Rascalz cheating to beat Subculture, with the Good Hands and ABC getting in a fight during the match.

ABC want the Tag Team Titles back but the Good Hands come in for the argument. A match seems likely.

Subculture is talking to Santino Marella about getting a rematch against the Rascalz. Sami Callihan and Rich Swann come in to say they want the title shot. The #1 contenders match is made instead. With everyone else gone, Joe Hendry and Yuya Uemura come in to say they want a title shot too. Santino thinks it’s a little too early for that.

Here are Kenny King and Sheldon Jean for a chat. King brags about his greatness and his Digital Media Title reign, including his recent title defenses. Cue Tommy Dreamer of all people to say we need to hear the REAL story of Emergence. Before King beat Johnny Swinger in the match of Swinger’s life, he heard that his father in law had passed away. Then King jumped Dreamer, as many have done before.

Swinger had to leave but he called Dreamer to check on him and everything was cool. Then he saw King and Jean at the bar, ignoring the show’s main event. Dreamer talks about how he remembered Dreamer trying to get all kinds of advice from the veterans and now this. King doesn’t care and talks about how Dreamer used to be the one with the women in the bar. Now Dreamer won’t leave so King can have the spot because he won’t let go of anything.

Dreamer says he never left early and King has never even been in a main event. Dreamer turned down millions of dollars from WWE and WCW because he believed in something and listened to people like Mick Foley and Terry Funk. Yes Dreamer is 52 years old and he looks at people like Sting and Chris Jericho or the 107 year old PCO. That makes him wonder why King doesn’t just knock them out to take the spot.

King says Dreamer doesn’t have anything he wants but Dreamer talks about losing his mom, being diagnosed with skin cancer and losing Terry Funk in the span of three months. All he has left is his career, so let’s do title vs. career at Victory Road. Dreamer leaves before King can answer. It’s an interesting story, but it’s still Dreamer and that holds things down a lot.

Awesome Kong is back at Impact 1000.

Gail Kim says if Kong is back then so is she. All past and previous Knockouts are invited back. Kim almost being summoned by the return of Kong is a cool way to go.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Steve Maclin wants to torture Josh Alexander at Victory Road. He has a target and is ready for bagging and tagging.

Moose/Brian Myers/Eddie Edwards vs. Frankie Kazarian/Jake Something/Sanada

Kazarian slugs away at Myers to start and Sanada comes in for a double suplex. Something clears the ring and we take an early break. Back with Sanada fighting out of Myers’ chinlock and firing off a string of dropkicks. The Paradise Lock doesn’t last long as Edwards drives Sanada into the corner to take over.

There’s the Blue Thunder Bomb for two on Sanada and a knee drop gets the same. Myers stomps away for two and it’s time to crank on Sanada’s face. Sanada hurricanranas his way out of a powerbomb and an enziguri staggers the heck out of Moose. It’s back to Kazarian who is happy to beat on Edwards some more. The Unprettier drops Edwards for two and stereo crossbodies put both of them down.

Something gets to come back in and clean house, including a pop up powerbomb to Moose. Back up and Moos muscles Something up for a powerbomb but gets Shining Wizarded by Sanada. Kazarian puts Myers down and crashes out to the floor with Edwards. Myers’ Roster Cut is countered into Into The Void to give Something the pin at 14:00.

Rating: B. They got rolling by the end here and it seems that they’re trying to do something with Som….yeah please change his name. Anyway, this was a good way to make Jake look like a bigger deal as not only was he in the main event but he hung in there with higher level talent. Now follow up on it and give him some more wins.

Overall Rating: B-. Not as good as last week’s awesome show but a completely acceptable two hour show. What matters here is getting some things set up for a few upcoming shows, which is hard to do when you’re coming off a big show. That being said, Impact has done this for a few months now and manage to make it work most of the time. Good show here, as they again do exactly what they need to do.

Results
Alisha Edwards on a Knockouts Battle Royal last eliminating Jody Threat
Mike Bailey b. Crazzy Steve via DQ when Steve gouged Bailey’s eyes
Eric Young b. Kon – Piledriver
Chris Sabin b. Zachary Wentz – Cradle Shock
Jake Something/Sanada/Frankie Kazarian b. Eddie Edwards/Brian Myers/Moose – Into The Void to Myers

 

 

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