Monday Night Raw – July 14, 2008: Crash TV

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 14, 2008
Location: RBC Center, Raleigh, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Somehow it’s been about three months since I’ve done one of these. It’s the last Raw before the Great American Bash and the big match on the Raw side will see Batista challenging CM Punk for the World Title. Other than that, JBL continues to think he runs the show and it’s still not quite interesting. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week, with Batista becoming the #1 contender for CM Punk’s World Title. Then Kane snapped and went all evil (again), this time attacking Jerry Lawler and Michael Cole.

Shane and Stephanie McMahon want us to all pull together to get through the times without Vince McMahon around. If things don’t get better, actions will be taken.

We go to the arena where Shawn Michaels is attacking Chris Jericho before Jericho can say anything. Lance Cade runs in for the save to get Jericho out of harm’s way.

With the three of them gone, here is Kane, complete with a small bag. Kane leans over the commentary table and says he’s sorry as the fans chant for Lawler. Then Kane walks off without getting physical.

In the back, Shawn Michaels has attacked Chris Jericho again and it has to be broken up.

Mickie James vs. Katie Lea

Non-title and Paul Burchill is here with Katie. Mickie grabs some early rollups for two each but the hurricanrana out of the corner is blocked. Katie pulls her around by the hair for two and we hit the reverse chinlock. We’ll make that a regular chinlock but Mickie is right back up. Mickie’s tornado DDT is blocked but now the hurricanrana works. The top rope Thesz press puts Katie away.

Rating: C-. Katie’s time seems to have come and gone, which is a shame as there is always the place for a British villain. Mickie is in need of some fresh challengers as she has been champion for awhile and no one seems to be giving her a threat. Granted that is likely to wind up being Beth Phoenix, as there isn’t anyone else who feels like they are on Mickie’s level.

Post match Paul and Katie go after Mickie until Kofi Kingston makes the save. It would have been rude for him not to make a save after Paul looked over his shoulder that many times.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Paul Burchill

Kingston is defending, the women are still here and we’re joined in progress with Kingston hitting a jumping elbow. A small package gives Kingston two before he grabs an armbar. An armdrag sets up another armbar as they’ve certainly slowed down a bit. Back up and Kofi’s dropkick gets two and it’s right back to the armbar.

Burchill fights up again and kicks him out of the corner for two, setting up a waistlock. A gutbuster and backsplash give Burchill two but Kingston fights out of another waistlock. Kingston’s Russian legsweep sets up the Boom Drop but here is Katie on the apron. That’s broken up by Mickie and Trouble In Paradise retains the title.

Rating: C. This was mostly armbars and waistlocks, which didn’t exactly make for an entertaining match. Other than that it was Kingston beating someone who didn’t feel like much of a threat. That being said, Kingston needs to pile up some wins to make himself feel more like a champion so giving him another win helps as much as anything else.

Santino Marella tells Matt Striker about his open challenge tonight. Cue Kane to ask about CM Punk. Santino: “Did you try the Pepsi machine?”

Post break Kane goes up to CM Punk, saying deep down inside, he knows someone is dead. Punk doesn’t know what is going on but Kane wants him tonight, one on one. Punk isn’t sure but Kane says this isn’t about the title. As usual, Punk is down for a challenge and the match is on. Punk asks about the bag Kane is carrying but Kane clutches it closer and leaves without saying anything.

A serious John Cena talks about how Vince McMahon is not here and he is trying to keep a good face on. Then JBL challenged him to a New York City Parking Lot Brawl and Cena can’t smile anymore. For those of you who don’t know what it’s about, it’s a war instead of a match. The two of them will be fighting in a circle of cars in a parking lot and anything goes. It’s about breaking bones and ripping flesh and we will find out if a man’s pride will fold. The question is why Cena would accept such a challenge but the reality is he and JBL don’t like each other.

Cena is down for one more fight at the Great American Bash because JBL considers himself a great American, which makes Cena sick. He’s happy to try to break some of JBL’s bones and send the face of a great American through every window he can find. Cena wants to see some real fear from JBL because this isn’t a fight with some pretty boy. Extreme violence is promised and here is Cryme Tyme to stand beside Cena, who accepts the challenge. As for tonight, let’s make it a six man with JBL finding any two partners he can.

Santino Marella vs. ???

It’s open challenge time and here is….Beth Phoenix to answer. They fight over a lockup to start until Beth shows him a double bicep. Beth takes him down and hammers away before easily powering out of a headlock. A slam gives Beth two but Santino shouts about being a man, only to miss a charge into the corner. That’s enough for Beth to grab a rollup for the fast pin, leaving Santino rather flummoxed.

Here is Kelly Kelly for a match but Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase interrupt. They know she has a match tonight….but they don’t care so she can leave. Cody talks about how the two of them have gotten a lot of unfair criticisms but they’re not bad guys. They’re just better than their fathers. When you’re this talented, you don’t need to pay dues. Imagine what happens when they enter their primes.

Cue Jim Duggan of all people to interrupt, saying he knows their dads. They’re old school, just like him. The difference is the old school people respected the generations that paved the way for them. DiBiase and Rhodes are better athletes, but they have a lot of growing up to do. Cody says Duggan might be on to something but Cody calls out Duggan for being 54 years old and trying to relive some glory days which weren’t that glorious in the first place.

DiBiase asks if Duggan thinks he still has what it takes anymore, when he’s really just here looking for a reaction. Duggan is the one who needs to grow up, and the two of them leave. JBL pops up on the screen to say they have earned the right to team with him in the main event. They’re in.

CM Punk vs. Kane

Non-title. Kane chokes him into the corner to start but Punk kicks his way to freedom. Punk manages to kick him out to the floor, where Kane cuts off a slide to take over again. The basement dropkick gives Kane two and we hit the cravate. We’ll make that a chinlock until Punk fights up and strikes away. A series of kicks sends Kane into the corner but the bulldog out of it is broken up. Instead Punk hits a heck of a kick to the head for one and a high crossbody gets two. Kane knocks him outside where Punk grabs a bulldog, which is enough to beat the count for the win.

Rating: C+. That was about as good of a way out as they had as Kane is the new monster and Punk is the new champion so there was only so much they could have done. At the same time it might have been better to not make the match in the first place, but at least Punk didn’t lose. Punk is always going to fight from behind and winning by countout is about as good as he can get in this spot.

Post match Kane throws in a bunch of chairs and wraps one around Punk’s neck but Batista makes the save. Batista helps Punk up so Punk offers him a handshake, but Batista wants the title. Batista gives him a not so nice slap on the face so Punk shoves, earning himself a spinebuster.

We look back at John Cena and Cryme Tyme destroying JBL’s limo last week.

Chris Jericho vs. Paul London

Lance Cade is here with Jericho, who pounds London into the corner and hits a running boot to the head. London gets sent outside in a heap before Jericho chokes on the ropes back inside. A spinwheel kick gives London a breather but he misses a high crossbody. Jericho hits a butterfly backbreaker and calls out Shawn Michaels before grabbing the Liontamer for the fast tap.

Post match Jericho says London can take that loss like he would and learn from it, or take it like Shawn Michaels and do nothing. Cue Shawn to say nothing will change between them and teasing more violence.

Jamie Noble hits on Layla, suggesting that they can be the Raw power couple. Layla says she doesn’t date short men but Noble says he’s way above average in the ring. Noble offers to jump the next guy who comes through here so cue Snitsky to tell him to be quiet. Layla isn’t impressed so Noble stands up to Snitsky. Even Layla realizes this is stupid as Noble calls Snitsky out to the ring. They wind up in said ring and a pumphandle slam leaves Noble laying.

We get the Shane/Stephanie McMahon plea for unity from earlier tonight.

Great American Bash rundown.

John Bradshaw Layfield/Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase vs. John Cena/Cryme Tyme

Cena and Rhodes start things off with Cena slugging him into a corner but glaring at JBL. The release fisherman’s suplex drops Cody Rhodes again, setting up another glare. Shad comes in for a release butterfly suplex to DiBiase so it’s back to Rhodes to kick away at JTG. Rhodes makes the mistake of telling JTG to shine his shoes and gets taken down with a Sling Blade for his troubles.

JBL comes in and is smart enough to taunt Cena in, meaning we get some double choking in the corner. JTG’s comeback is cut off by a dropkick to the knee and the villains get to take over on said knee. The leglock goes on and we take a break with JTG in more trouble. Back with JBL hitting a hard clothesline and the slow beating continuing.

Rhodes goes old school with a spinning toehold until JTG kicks him away, which still isn’t enough to get over for the tag. JTG finally gets away and brings Cena back in to pick the pace way up. JBL bails and it’s an FU to DiBiase into the Throwback to Rhodes. Cena’s top rope Fameasser hits Rhodes but JBL is back to break up the STFU…for the DQ. That’s a pretty lame reason for a DQ but sure enough. Even Lawler doesn’t seem sure why that was a DQ.

Rating: C-. This was slow and not exactly good, with the ending feeling like a rather pitiful way out. It’s not a good sign when commentary is confused about what happened, even when it should have been pretty clear. I get that you don’t want a champion jobbing, but JBL couldn’t have used a chair or something a little more violent? Other than that, it was a rather long heat segment on JTG and that wasn’t the most thrilling way to go.

Post match JBL walks off and taunts Cena to follow him to the back. Cena gives chase and realizes he has to go into the parking lot (where a camera happens to be waiting). Then he stands around a lot in total silence until JBL finally jumps him from behind with something metal. JBL sits the unconscious Cena in front of a car and crushes him, then gets out and realizes what he’s done to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I wasn’t quite thrilled with this show as the focus was on Cena vs. JBL, which hasn’t been an interesting feud in a long time. The World Champion feels like a third wheel behind the battling John’s and Shawn vs. Jericho. There is some good stuff going on closer to the top of the card, but my goodness the lower part of the show isn’t exactly holding the rest of it up.

 

 

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