Impact Wrestling – May 9, 2024: That’s Interesting

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 9, 2024
Location: Albany Armory, Albany, New York
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re done with Under Siege and it wasn’t the most eventful show in the world. The System came out on top in the main event but it still seems that we’ll be seeing Broken Matt Hardy challenging for the World Title at some point. Other than that, we need to start the build towards Slammiversary in July. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long Under Siege recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is the System for their big championship celebration. Everyone comes out with their titles, with the local Arena Football League cheerleaders welcoming them to the ring. Brian Myers brags about everyone on the team being a champion and says they don’t have enough time in the show to list off all of their accomplishments. Moose talks about being better than the 90s Bulls before Eddie Edwards praises Alisha Edwards for her greatness.

Alisha has a video on the team…but Broken Matt Hardy breaks things up. He is here to break the System but now he understands them a bit better. This is not over because it is just the beginning. Hardy wants to see Moose’s Super Bowl ring and calls Alisha a snow witch. The brawl is on and Matt fights them off with a chair, at least until the numbers get the better of him. Ryan (not Nic) Nemeth of all people comes in to make the save with a kendo stick. The cheerleaders do the DELETE pose. This was good, save for everything involving Matt Hardy.

We look at Mustafa Ali beating Ace Austin to retain the X-Division Title at Under Siege.

The ABC is ready to face Speedball Mountain, with the winners facing each other for a future X-Division Title shot. There’s no tension between them…or at least so they say.

The System yells at Santino Marella about what just happened but he has an announcement that is going to help them. Stay tuned.

FBI vs. First Class

Little Guido is here with the FBI. Clayton suplexes Swann down to start and scores with a t-bone suplex to send him flying again. Francis comes in to run some people over, allowing him to choke Clayton on the ropes. A double clothesline puts them both down and the double tag brings in Jaz and Swann, with the former cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Francis chokeslams Jaz, setting up a frog splash to give Swann the pin at 3:35.

Rating: C. It’s a heck of a lot better to see the new version of the FBI instead of trotting out the old guys for one more hurrah. Having Guido out there to tie the generations together is a nice touch and the team isn’t all that bad. Francis continues to reinvent himself after leaving WWE and he’s doing pretty well at it. Swann took a heck of a beating here before picking up the win, which was a bit of a surprise.

Jake Something and the Rascalz both complain to Santino Marella about various things. Marella makes a tag match, with Deaner coming in to be Something’s partner.

Alan Angels is back with Sound Check with Kon and Steph de Lander as his guests. Angels thinks de Lander and Kon are dating but that’s not true. When Angels is told no, he hits on de Lander, meaning it’s time for Kon to beat up security. And that’s that.

Rascalz vs. Jake Something/Deaner

Hold on though as Deaner has some options from Santino Marella. We can keep this as a regular tag match or maybe make it an Albany Tornado match. The people vote and tornado it is. It’s a brawl to start (as it’s supposed to be) with Something slamming both of them next to each other. The Rascalz are sent to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Something on the floor and Deaner getting double teamed. Something gets rammed into the post, leaving Wentz to hit a running shooting star press for two on Deaner.

That takes enough time for Something to fight up and clean house, including tossing Wentz at Miguel to cut off a suicide dive (that was great). A sitout powerbomb gets two on Miguel but he’s back up with a poisonrana. Stereo covers get stereo near falls as the fans voice their approval. Miguel and Something head outside, where Miguel blinds him with the spray paint. That leaves Deaner to get caught with a backbreaker/double stomp combination for the pin at 9:45.

Rating: B-. This was a back and forth match which was a good bit better than I was expecting. Something is feeling like…well something actually, as he has the look and power to feel like a monster. He just needs to win, pardon the expression, something already or none of that potential matters. Deaner is going to be fine with the People’s Choice stuff, as it’s tailor made to get him cheered.

Post match Steve Maclin runs in to wreck the Rascalz.

Maclin goes to the back and gets in an argument with Frankie Kazarian, suggesting that a deal they had fell through.

We get a sitdown interview with Mike Santana, who is very happy with his return at Rebellion. Yes he is most known for his time with LAX and he is very happy with what happened back then. Then he was away for five years and lost his dad just before the pandemic hit. He needed to save his own life and….more on this later. They’re treating Santana like a big deal and that is a good thing.

Here is Gabby LaSpisa, a wrestling podcast host, to bring out Ash By Elegance for a chat. After Ash’s handler comes out for the big introduction, Gabby asks about….Ash’s last name, but apparently Elegance is a lifestyle brand. Gabby has never heard of it and doesn’t like being insulted so we look at Ash attacking Havok with a chair after their match at Under Siege. Maybe Ash is mad because Xia Brookside beat her a few weeks back. Handler: “WHERE DID YOU GET THAT FOOTAGE???” Gabby: “From the TNA+ app.” Cue Brookside to issue a challenge for a rematch for Ash’s rings. Deal. This was really not very good as talking isn’t Ash’s strong point and Gabby wasn’t much better.

We look at Joe Hendry being interviewed about his theme song climbing the UK charts.

Santino Marella has his big announcement: the Champions Challenge, a 16 person tag next week, featuring Moose/Jordynne Grace/Mustafa Ali/Brian Myers/Eddie Edwards/Masha Slamovich/Alisha Edwards/Laredo Kid vs. Matt Hardy/Steph de Lander/Sami Callihan/Eric Young/Ryan Nemeth/Jody Threat/Dani Luna/Joe Hendry. That’s up next week, with Josh Alexander being replaced by….I’m assuming Nemeth due to injury. That’s quite the match, though egads it’s going to be chaos.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Will Ferrara

Gresham, wrestling in a mask, starts fast with a dropkick and ties up the arm as commentary talks about Gresham spitting up ink during his match with Kushida at Under Siege. Ferrara sends him into the corner but gets taken down with a springboard moonsault. Gresham rams the knee into the mat a few times before rubbing the ink into Ferrara’s face. A Mandible Claw finishes Ferrara at 3:31.

Rating: C. Something tells me Gresham’s poison/evil ink deal is going to get annoying rather quickly. Gresham is someone who doesn’t need much to make him work as he’s that good in the ring (and is looking in the best shape of his career). Putting something goofy on him like this could make things a lot more complicated than it needs to be and unfortunately that’s where we are now.

Gail Kim drives to a mountain retreat and finds a meditating Gisele Shaw, saying they need to talk.

Speedball Mountain vs. ABC

The winners face off in a singles match for a future X-Division Title shot against Mustafa Ali, who is on commentary. Bailey takes Bey down to start and it’s off to Seven for an assisted twisting moonsault. It’s back to Bailey, who gets elbowed in the face to cut him off rather quickly. Austin comes in and stomps on Bailey in the corner, setting up Bey’s kicks to the back. Bailey is back up with a middle rope dropkick to Austin, meaning Seven can grab a DDT. Seven’s swinging slam gets two on Bey but it’s way too early for Bailey’s shooting star press. The crash leaves everyone down and we take a break.

Back with Seven and Bey coming in off the double tag and an exchange of shoulders. Bey’s DDT is countered into a suplex but said suplex is countered with a knee to the head. Everything breaks down again and all four are knocked down in a hurry. ABC stomps away to take over but Bailey superkicks Bey to the floor. Seven drops Austin for two but Bey knocks Bailey into the cover for the save.

ABC is sent outside and Mountain hits a pair of dives to drop both of them. Back in and Bailey hits Bey with the tornado kick but gets sent outside. Austin hits the big flip dive to take Mountain out at the same time. We pause for Austin to yell at Ali, leaving Bailey to kick Bey into a dragon suplex from Seven. Austin gets Birminghammered into the Ultimate Weapon for the pin at 17:00.

Rating: B. Fast paced back and forth match here and the stipulation made things all the more interesting. TNA is doing some good work with figuring out some unique ways to set up title matches. Mountain isn’t exactly a great team but they are a thrown together pairing who are doing well enough. ABC isn’t doing much these days, but there isn’t much else for them to do as a team anyway. Maybe we’ll get another singles run from both of them, though almost anything they do is likely to work out.

Overall Rating: B-. This show was in a weird place as there wasn’t much at Under Siege and yet they needed to get things going for the next show. The big tag match next week should be good and I’m curious to see where it goes. Other than that, we had enough good action to get by, though it was more a show designed to get us to the bigger stuff than anything else.

Results
First Class b. FBI – Frog splash to Jaz
Rascalz b. Jake Something/Deaner – Backbreaker/double stomp combination to Deaner
Jonathan Gresham b. Will Ferrara – Mandible Claw
Speedball Mountain b. ABC – Ultimate Weapon to Austin

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