Survivor Series 2023 (2024 Edition): Two For One

Survivor Series 2023
Date: November 25, 2023
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

So believe it or not, the focus is going to be on WarGames and in this case it means the good guys need one more star to help fight off Judgment Day. In theory that is going to be Randy Orton, who has been gone for about a year and a half and isn’t quite back yet. Other than that, Damage CTRL is facing another ragtag group of women so let’s get to it.

It’s almost weird to see the old Then Now Together Forever intro after the change at Wrestlemania XL.

The opening video focuses on WarGames, because what else was it going to be?

The cage is lowered.

WarGames recap:

• Two wrestlers start and fight for five minutes.

• After five minutes, the team with the advantage (as determined before the match) gets a three minute advantage.

• The teams alternate until all ten are in and then it’s first pin/submission to win.

Women’s WarGames

Charlotte, Bianca Belair, Becky Lynch, Shotzi
Bayley, Iyo Sky, Asuka, Kairi Sane

Lynch and Bayley start things off with Lynch sending her into the cage, only to get sent into the buckle. Bayley catches Lynch going up top but Lynch rolls over her and they slug it out. Lynch’s exploder sends her flying but Bayley gets in a ram into the cage. They go between the rings so Bayley can get in a suplex as they’re certainly going with the violence to start. The fight goes into the other ring and Lynch sends her into the cage a few times.

The Disarm-Her goes on but here is Dakota Kai with a kendo stick through the cage to break it up. That’s enough for Bayley to take over and it’s Shotzi coming in, with a ram of the door onto Bayley’s head, to take over. Naturally that means a bunch of chairs and weapons are thrown in, because THE BIG DOUBLE CAGE isn’t enough. Shotzi sets up the chair and Bayley has to climb the cage to get away from some rather painful swings.

They all go up the cage and ram each other into the steel until Bayley crashes down. Stereo forearms from the to take her down again but it’s Iyo Sky coming in to tie it up, complete with a chain. For some reason Lynch and Shotzi don’t see her coming and get beaten down, as WarGames seems to make people a bit slow. A springboard double missile dropkick puts Lynch and Shotzi down again and Bayley is back up. Lynch gets double superplexed down for a crash but Shotzi fights out of the corner, allowing Belair to come in.

Belair whips with the hair and the fans rather approve. A spinebuster puts Bayley down but she and grab the braids, only to get suplexed down. Lynch and Shotzi are back in with a guillotine legdrop and top rope splash before Kairi Sane is in to even things up. Well eventually that is, as she takes her sweet time getting a trashcan lid and then headscissoring Belair anyway.

The sliding forearm against the cage sends Belair into the cage before it’s time to bury Shotzi under some chairs. The pop up elbow drop crushes Shotzi but Belair is back to throw Sane onto Bayley and Sky. Charlotte comes in to complete her team and Sky is sent crashing into the cage. Naturally the fans want tables but have to settle for a top rope double Natural Selection (which Graves has to point out to Cole, who realizes his mistake in a funny bit) to Bayley and Sane.

Charlotte starts climbing the cage but Sky, with a chain, gets o her shoulders and gets all the way to the top. Sky drops the chain to Kai, who ties it around a trashcan so Sky can pull it up (that was clever). Sky puts the trashcan over her head and dives onto the pile (she LOVES that spot), who were nice enough to stand there while Sky took forever to get ready (fair enough). Asuka is in to complete the field and she has some colored kendo sticks. And a table. And a fire extinguisher.

Therefore, a good minute after her clock ended, Asuka gets in and WarGames officially begins. Damage CTRL all grab weapons to hammer on the others, with Lynch and Belair being tied together with the chain like they’re in an old western. Shotzi is back up but gets misted by Asuka to cut her right back down. Lynch is put inside the trashcan and dropkicked down for two and it’s time to set up a table. Belair and Lynch come back with powerbombs out of the corner though and Charlotte goes all the way up top for the huge moonsault to wipe out everyone.

We get the big staredown between Lynch and Charlotte, who hug for the rather positive reaction. The Figure Eight and cross armbreaker go on but Sane is up for the save. Shotzi is back up to drop Asuka for two with Bayley making a save of her own. Bayley Rose Plants Lynch but gets caught with a Sliced Bread from Shotzi. Belair is up with the fire extinguisher and Charlotte spears Bayley. The KOD hits Bayley as well and the super Manhandle Slam through a table finishes her off at 33:37.

Rating: B. It had the carnage and violence with the weapons, but there is always a lack of intensity to these matches that hold them back. Part of it stems from the people coming to the ring but then pausing to get their weapons. Other than that, it was the usual WWE WarGames: a lot of brawling and hitting other people with weapons, with the cage mainly being there to jump off of rather than for violence, which is more than a bit odd.

The winners pose on top of the cage.

Chelsea Green, Piper Niven and the Alpha Academy are enjoying some Ruffles when Pretty Deadly come in to argue over whether they’re chips or crisps. R-Truth comes in to say they’re Ruffles.

Sami Zayn tells Jey Uso that Randy Orton, the last member of their team, isn’t here yet. Jey isn’t surprised and takes the blame because the Bloodline injured him two years ago. Sami says it’s not his fault and things seem to be ok.

We recap Miz challenging Gunther for the Intercontinental Title. Gunther is the longest reigning champion and doesn’t think much of Miz, who wants the title back. To say Miz has no chance here would be an understatement.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Gunther

Gunther is defending and commentary spends his entrance talking about how he is almost unbeatable, even giving Miz’s long shot betting odds. Miz kicks at the leg to start and a chop just annoys Gunther. A much better chop puts Miz down but he’s back up with more chops and some left hands in the corner to actually take over. Gunther gives chase but gets his leg wrapped around the post to slow him down.

The Figure Four around the post stays on the leg, though it’s good enough to boot Miz out of the air back inside. Gunther slows things down a bit and chops away to drop Miz again. A release German suplex sends Miz flying and a big boot lets Gunther pose as the dominance is on. Back up and Miz strikes away at the knee again, with a shinbreaker slowing Gunther down. Some kicks to the chest stagger Gunther into the corner and a tornado DDT gets two.

The Skull Crushing Finale is blocked though and Gunther grabs his powerbomb for his own near fall. The sleeper goes on so Miz goes to the corner, pulling the turnbuckle off in the process. A low blow into the Skull Crushing Finale gets two (with Cole letting us know that “MIZ IS GONNA DO IT!” to ruin the moment) and Miz is shocked. The fans want to see it again but Miz gets caught in the sleeper. That’s reversed into a ram into the buckle so Miz can roll him up for two (with a Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper reference), only to get blasted with a clothesline. The top rope splash into the Boston crab retains the title at 12:19.

Rating: B-. This was about as good as it was going to be as there was just no reason to believe that Miz was going to win. Even his big near fall was only so good, as pretty much no one was on Gunther’s level at this time. Miz going after the leg to slow Gunther down was a good story, as Miz can still wrestle a fine match given the chance. It was a good match, but there was just not much drama and that held it back.

Judgment Day is ready for WarGames and is rather pleased that Randy Orton doesn’t seem to be here. Even if he shows up, he might poison the other team and Judgment Day wins anyway.

We recap Dragon Lee vs. Santos Escobar. This stems from Escobar turning on Rey Mysterio and the LWO, so Lee is standing up for the team (replacing Carlito, who was also injured by Escobar). Pretty simple story here and that’s not a bad thing.

Santos Escobar vs. Dragon Lee

Escobar forearms away to start and stomps him down, setting up a quick backbreaker for two. Some running knees in the corner send Lee outside, where he has to escape having his leg crushed in the steps. A running hurricanrana off the apron sends Escobar outside and there’s the big running flip dive.

Back in and Escobar kicks him in the head, setting up a super hurricanrana for two. Like any good rudo, Escobar goes after the mask but Lee is fine enough to tie him in the tree of woe for thee double stomp. Back up and Escobar hits a heck of a superkick but Lee muscles him up into a sitout powerbomb for two. Escobar shrugs that off and his a Canadian Destroyer, followed by the Phantom Driver for the pin at 8:20.

Rating: C+. WWE was doing what they could to make Lee into a bigger deal around this time but it was only going to get so far when he kept losing. Escobar was running through the LWO on his way to a showdown with Rey Mysterio whenever Mysterio got back and he had to beat Lee on the way there. This wasn’t a great match, but it kept Escobar looking strong and it’s nice to have something other than a title or WarGames mach on the show.

New Day is here with a Slim Jim car.

We recap Zoey Stark challenging Rhea Ripley for the Raw Women’s Title. Stark is the new tough star and Ripley needs a fresh victim so the match is on.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Zoey Stark

Ripley is defending and Stark actually double legs her down to hammer away to start. A dropkick sends Ripley outside and there’s the dive off the top to take her down again. Back in and a missile dropkick continues Stark’s hot start but Ripley headbutts her into the next county to cut that off in a hurry. Stark is right back with a DDT onto the apron and a springboard corkscrew senton gets two. They go outside again with Ripley dropping her onto the apron and then sending her into the post to really take over.

Ripley cranks on both arms back inside and then stomps her down before taking Stark up top. What looks to be a super chokeslam is countered into…I have no idea what Stark was doing there but she gets two and screams a lot. Ripley elbows and kicks her in the face, setting up a belly to back faceplant. Riptide is countered though and Stark hits a running knee for two. The Z360 is blocked as well and now Riptide can connect to retain the title at 9:16.

Rating: C. This got a bit sloppy after that whole thing off the top, as even commentary didn’t seem sure about what was going on. Other than that, it was Ripley against someone who only felt like so much of a threat. That’s part of the problem with someone becoming as big of a star as Ripley: you can only have so many realistic challengers to her and that is becoming an issue here.

Randy Orton still isn’t here and Jey Uso still blames himself.

We recap the men’s WarGames match. Judgment Day is the big monster heel stable on Raw and a bunch of people are sick of them, so violence ensued and the match is on. Drew McIntyre is in with Judgment Day for the sake of getting his hands on Jey Uso in a cage. It still isn’t clear if Randy Orton will be here, as he hasn’t been around in about a year and a half at this point.

Men’s WarGames

Cody Rhodes, Seth Rollins, Jey Uso, Sami Zayn, Randy Orton
Damian Priest, Finn Balor, Dominik Mysterio, JD McDonagh, Drew McIntyre

McIntyre and Priest stare each other down on the stage as Balor goes to start with Rollins (who doesn’t have a Randy Orton here yet). They start fast with Rollins diving over the ropes to jump Balor and hammer away. The fight is quickly on and Rollins sends him into the cage a few times and they change rings, where Balor escapes a buckle bomb. Balor sends him into the cage to take over and there’s a Sling Blade to drop Rollins again as a CM PUNK chant starts up.

A superkick gives Rollins a breather but Balor backdrops him onto the plate between the rings. The Coup de Grace misses though and Rollins grabs a quick Sling Blade. Rollins drops him again and it’s JD McDonagh to uneven things, albeit a good bit less than five minutes into the match. Rollins kicks him on the way in but gets hit with a kendo stick for his efforts.

Balor and McDonagh take turns choking with the kendo sticks but Rollins sends McDonagh into the other ring. That’s broken up in a hurry and a middle rope kendo stick to the back puts Rollins down again. Jey Uso is in next (McIntyre gives him a death stare) and chairs McDonagh down before firing off the YEET punches. The dancing spit punch puts Balor down but McDonagh is back up with a running Spanish Fly.

Rollins makes the save and hammers on Balor in the corner as the clock runs down. McIntyre is ready to get in and go after Uso but Priest cuts him off, saying they stick to the plan. Rollins and Uso jump him as he comes in but the other two make the save, allowing Priest to whip out a baton and take over. Priest hits some running shoulders in the corner, followed by a lifting Downward Spiral to Rollins.

A top rope flip dive takes out Rollins and Uso and Balor chairs Uso in the back. Sami Zayn comes in to even the sides, and takes his sweet time doing so. McDonagh, ever the nitwit, swings a kendo stick at Zayn, who takes it away and blasts him with it instead. The table is thrown in, which the fans find UCEY. Zayn is fired up as he stomps away, setting up a Blue Thunder Bomb to Balor. With the villains down, Zayn goes up and grabs a pipe, which is used on various opponents in rather painful ways.

A kendo stick to the back rocks Balor and Zayn throws the stick out of the cage, possibly by accident. McIntyre is in and throws Rollins and Zayn around without much effort. That leaves McIntyre to finally go into the other ring with Uso, who slugs away but gets dropped by a neckbreaker. The rest of Judgment Day is back up to hammer away, but McIntyre’s Claymore runs into a superkick from Uso.

A 1D puts McIntyre down and Cody Rhodes is in, with Cole immediately going into the Dusty Rhodes tribute. Cole: “Cody also invented a big event in this city as well!” And we move on. Rhodes cleans house and suplexes Balor onto McDonagh for a crash. It’s bullrope time (of course) and Rollins joins Rhodes in taking out Balor and McDonagh. Dominik Mysterio is in to complete the Judgment Day and gives Rhodes Two Amigos…and then realizes he’s surrounded.

The big group beatdown has the fans rather pleased and a table being set up in the corner makes them even happier. The rest of the villains save Mysterio and the fans chant for Orton. That’s switched to Punk, followed by silence as McIntyre and Priest hit a triple chokeslam (and a good one at that). McDonagh adds a moonsault, Balor hits the Coup de Grace and Mysterio drops the frog splash.

Priest Razor’s Edges Rollins through a table and the clock ends….but there’s no Orton. Instead here is Rhea Ripley with Priest’s Money In The Bank briefcase, which for some reason is enough to bring Orton out (no cash-in) and egads the fans are happy to see him. Orton gets in the cage (no weapons) and slams the door, which bounces back open in a funny bit. House is quickly cleaned, mainly because Judgment Day comes at him one at a time.

McIntyre gets in a shot on Orton and the big beatdown is on. Everyone else is back up for the save and Orton and company hit quintuple hanging DDTs. Orton teases an RKO to Uso but Uso superkicks Priest to save Orton instead. The RKO drops Mysterio and it’s a parade of finishers to the villains. Everyone goes after McDonagh, who tries to escape but Zayn and Rollins follow him up top. With Orton on the mat, Zayn and Rollins throw McDonagh into an RKO, leaving Rhodes to Cross Rhodes Priest for the pin at 34:22.

Rating: B+. I liked this one a bit more than the women’s version, mainly because it felt more like a fight rather than a big series of weapons spots. The pop when Orton came out was insane and it made things feel special. You don’t see that kind of thing very often and the whole thing was about as violent as this is going to get. Seeing Mysterio and Mysterio get beaten down was a good way to go and this felt like an all-star team coming together to take out a mostly unified opposition. Solid main event here, and while it wasn’t a classic WarGames match, it was good by WWE standards.

The good guys celebrate, the copyright notice comes up….and the impossible happens as CM Punk is back for the first time in almost ten years. The fans take over the IT’S CLOBBERIN TIME and Punk hugs a bunch of fans. This was an absolutely insane moment that I never thought I would see. Even after Punk left AEW, it was hard to fathom and yet here it was. Great way to end the show and dang it worked.

A long recap ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. This show was centered around two matches and those matches both delivered. The other three were just filler to get us from one big match to the next and that’s a fine way to go. The big stories here were the double returns at the end and those worked rather well. It helps that the show was less than three hours from start to finish so they didn’t waste any time. Good show here, with the special moment at the end being worth a look.

 

 

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