Smackdown – September 5, 2008: HHH Doesn’t Know Baseball
Smackdown
Date: September 5, 2008
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz
It’s finally the last show before Unforgiven and that means we aren’t likely to be in for the most thrilling show. Other than the World Title situation, Undertaker is still mad at Vickie Guerrero, which means we could be in for a lot of more spooky stuff which leads nowhere. Hopefully we have something better than last week, which was dreadful. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
We open with a recap of Vickie Guerrero being scared of Undertaker, who is swearing vengeance. Vickie has begged for forgiveness but Undertaker doesn’t seem agreeable.
Opening sequence.
Here is HHH to get things going. He explains the concept of the Championship Scramble, which sounds like something you order at Denny’s at 3am. Now he’s never been great at math, but he has about a 15-20% chance of keeping his title but here is Shelton Benjamin to interrupt. Benjamin talks about what it is going to take to retain the title and he is the gold standard when it comes to talent.
We see a clip of Benjamin laying HHH out last week, though HHH points out that it came after HHH beat him. HHH calls him a good cheap shot artist and invites him to come try his luck face to face. Cue MVP to interrupt, saying he’s better than HHH, Benjamin and “the Charismatic Enigma” (MVP: “Whatever that means.”). MVP and Benjamin argue but HHH asks how long they’ve been in this company.
HHH says this is the week before a pay per view so he comes to the ring to talk about defending his title at the pay per view. HHH: “That’s called a promo.” He then explains what is supposed to happen: While he’s doing his “promo” (yes he does the finger quotes), these guys interrupt him and talk a bunch of trash that they know they can’t back up.
HHH then proceeds to insult them and their families or something like that, leading to them attempting to beat him up. Then he fights back, sending them running off to the back and we don’t see them the rest of the night. That’s a very simple formula but apparently it isn’t ringing a bell to them. HHH: “I swear to you, I am going to be champion for like the next century.”
Cue The Brian Kendrick, who gets decked, and Ezekiel Jackson, who offers a distraction so Kendrick can kick HHH down. MVP and Benjamin run in for the beatdown but Jeff Hardy runs in for the save. Jackson breaks up the Swanton but HHH is back up with a chair, which just annoys Jackson a bit. The slightly less serious promos continue around here and they continue to be father funny.
Bam Neely vs. R-Truth
Chavo Guerrero is here with Neely. R-Truth armdrags him to start but gets driven into the corner so Neely can hammer away. The neck crank doesn’t last long for Neely as R-Truth fights up and hits the jumping kick to the face. The spinning forearm and the top rope missile dropkick connect, setting up the ax kick for the fast pin on Neely.
Here is Undertaker (with Peacock cutting off his entrance) to say that he won’t forgive Vickie Guerrero. Instead he plans to kill her, put her in a coffin and light it on fire so she’ll be in H*** with her husband Edge. Then the lights go out and Undertaker disappears.
MVP vs. Shelton Benjamin
Non-title. Before his entrance, Benjamin pops up on screen to talk about how precious gold is, but he is even more precious. Both of them seem freaked out over Undertaker vanishing and keep looking over their shoulder as they come to the ring. They go straight to the brawling, with MVP getting the better of the slugout on the mat. Benjamin knocks him to the floor though and MVP teases leaving, only to deck Benjamin for coming to get him. Back in and Benjamin jumps over him but MVP scores with a running big boot. Benjamin shrugs that off though and grabs Paydirt for the fast pin.
Rating: C+. Benjamin winning is fine and in this case it has a bit of a build towards the title match at Unforgiven. I like the idea of mixing things up a bit here, which you don’t get very often with heel vs. heel matches. It lets things feel a bit fresher, and that is something that is often welcome after seeing the same people rotated against each other.
Maryse insults Maria’s hand made gear, saying we don’t want a wardrobe malfunction tonight. Maryse’s gear is custom made and Maria might not have the curves to fit into them.
Maria vs. Maryse
Maria charges at her to start and the brawl is on, with the two of them heading outside. Maryse hits a clothesline to take over, followed by a backbreaker for two back inside. A catapult sends Maria throat first into the ropes and Maria flips over for a reverse chinlock. Back up and Maria snaps off a running headscissors but misses a high crossbody. The DDT gives Maryse the quick pin.
Post match Michelle McCool comes out to stare Maryse down.
The Brian Kendrick vs. Jeff Hardy
Ezekiel Jackson is here with Kendrick. Hardy starts fast by hammering him down in the corner but Kendrick gets in a kick to the back of the head. Kendrick grabs something close to a dragon sleeper, followed by another kick to the head for another two. The chinlock goes on for a bit before Hardy avoids a charge into the corner. Hardy hits the slingshot dropkick and hits a sitout gordbuster to plant Kendrick again. An Alley Oop gets two and they head outside, where Jackson gets in a cheap shot by sending Hardy into the barricade. Back in and the Kendrick gives Kendrick the pin.
Rating: B-. These guys worked well together and Kendrick’s rather surprising push continues. What matters the most is that he feels like enough of a wildcard that he has to be watched on Sunday. The more options there are to leave with the title the better and this helped Kendrick get closer to that spot.
Vickie Guerrero arrives and is livid at a wheelchair waiting on her, as she did NOT order it. Now get these cars out of her way! The cars are not in her way.
Super Crazy vs. Ryan Braddock
Crazy kicks him down to start and the fans seem to approve. Back up and Braddock hits a shot to the back of the head, only to charge into a boot in the corner. Crazy hits the moonsault for the fast pin.
Post match here is Vladimir Kozlov to drop Crazy and demand better competition. Cue the Big Show to mock his own lack of action lately, but he’s feeling a little competitive too. They’re both ready to go but here is Vickie Guerrero to tell Kozlov to get out. Vickie tells Show to get out as well, or face indefinite suspension.
With no one else in the ring, Vickie talks about Undertaker, saying she has lifted his suspension and even apologized. She will no longer be a victim because she has been through so much in her life. Therefore at Unforgiven, she will get what she wants: an apology from Undertaker. Without Edge or someone to fight for her, this is really not working.
Brie Bella vs. Victoria
Victoria starts fast and grinds her down with a headlock. That’s broken up and Bella pulls on both arms before sending Victoria outside. Victoria rams her into the apron and they go back inside, where Victoria sends her right back outside. Brie crawls underneath the ring again and is out the other side rather quickly, setting up the rollup to pin Victoria again. Must be grabbing a Gatorade or something under there.
WWE is at the Republican National Convention and want you to vote.
Raw Rebound, again all about Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels.
Unforgiven rundown.
HHH is asked about his matches tonight and on Sunday, with the question being about his greatest concern. HHH: “Right now, probably global warming or maybe the economy.” Anyway, he talks about looking your next challenger in the face and here’s Jeff Hardy. HHH isn’t sure if anyone can complete a thought without being interrupted. Hardy is sorry for interrupting the “promo” and calls himself HHH’s problem at Unforgiven. HHH says Hardy already has two strikes against him and there’s the old saying: three strikes and you’re out of the game. I think the saying actually goes “HHH doesn’t know how baseball works.”
HHH vs. Great Khali
Non-title lumberjack match, with the other people in the Scramble as lumberjacks. Khali hits an early clothesline to start and sends HHH outside, where the lumberjacks get in a stomping. We take a break and come back with Khali working on a nerve hold (you knew that was coming).
The elbows in the corner have HHH in more trouble as Tazz actually explains the idea of a lumberjack match. I actually love it when commentary does stuff like that, as it’s something longtime fans know, but what about someone who is watching for the first time? Take ten seconds and clear it up for them.
Anyway, HHH gets knocked outside where the villains jump him, with Hardy going over for the save. Hardy gets taken out and the chokebomb gives Khali two back inside. HHH actually goes up and hits a middle rope shoulder but the lumberjacks pull him outside for another beating. Hardy flip dives onto them for the big save, leaving HHH to hit the spinebuster. The Pedigree is blocked again though and Khali gets the vice grip, which is actually broken up. A headbutt staggers Khali and HHH hits the Pedigree for the pin.
Rating: C+. These two had an odd chemistry together and this worked well enough. The lumberjacks at least tied into everything else and HHH gets to slay a giant to look like he’s a bigger deal on the way to the title match. That’s all you need out of something like this and it was still better than the lame battle royals on Raw.
Post match Hardy goes in to help HHH up and then gives him the Twist Of Fate (fans are NOT sure what to make of that) to end the show.
Overall Rating: C+. This had some good enough parts, oddly enough with most of it coming from HHH. The Undertaker/Vickie Guerrero stuff continues to be the most “get this over with” story going, but the stuff with the World Title is holding up well. Most of the action was just ok, but I laughed a lot at the opening promo and the main event worked well enough. Now just nail it at Unforgiven.
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