Superstars – September 7, 1991: Death, Taxes And Cyclops
Superstars
Date: September 7, 1991
Location: War Memorial, Rochester, New York
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper
We’re done with Summerslam and that means it’s time to talk about the big wedding. The real main event of Summerslam saw Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth get married and this week we’ll be seeing what happened at the reception. Other than that, it’s your usual Superstars goodness so let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Roddy Piper goes OFF about Sid Justice being the only one willing to stand up to Jake Roberts and Undertaker. More on this later.
We run down the show.
Texas Tornado vs. Bubba Monroe
Commentary goes into their somber tones about the wedding reception and how horrible things were for Savage and Elizabeth. Piper shifts over to Tornado, who wrestles Monroe down to start. We get an insert interview from Tornado, talking about how Sgt. Slaughter should stay in seclusion after turning his back on his country. Tornado punches him in the ribs and hits the Tornado….we’ll call it a strike of some sort in the head region as it certainly wasn’t a Punch for the pin at 2:24.
We go to the wedding reception (Bobby Heenan shaking his head in sadness as he shakes Savage’s hand is great). They do the first dance and cut the cake and throw the boquet. Then it’s time to cut open the presents…which includes a cobra. Undertaker pops in to SMASH Savage in the head with the urn and Jake Roberts taunts Elizabeth with the snake.
Sid Justice is the only person to stand up to them, chasing Roberts off with a chair. Undertaker’s urn shot was great and there is something funny about someone filming Roberts tormenting the bride. Heck of a segment here, as it was so over the top that the villains look totally evil as a result.
Skinner vs. Scott Summers
Make your own Cyclops jokes. Skinner takes him down to start and ties him in the ropes for a neck snap. Skinner’s insert promo mocks the Dragon before Skinner hits something like a Pedigree into the reverse DDT for the pin at 2:04.
EVENT CENTER!
British Bulldog is ready for various villains, including the newly debuted BULLY.
Jimmy Hart and the Nasty Boys are ready to beat up various teams, including the Legion Of Doom. Knobbs accuses Jack Tunney wearing LOD shoulder pads so he must be on the LOD’s side. There’s a visual.
Virgil vs. Chris Duffy
For some reason Virgil’s entrance is missing. Virgil slugs away to start (must be mad about his missing entrance) and sends him outside for a dive. Back in and a slam sets up the Million Dollar Dream to give Virgil the win at 2:23.
UPDATE!
We look back at Bobby Heenan on the Funeral Parlor, where he suggested that the WWF Title was nothing compared to the REAL World Title. On top of that, there are some very loudmouthed people around here, like Roddy Piper. This brought Piper to the set, where he said Hogan was the only real champion. Piper says he scares Flair and spits on the belt to send Heenan running.
Berzerker vs. Kerry Davis
Mr. Fuji is here with Berzerker, who throws Davis around with ease. Berzerker ties him in the ropes for some running boots then throws him over the top for the countout at 2:27.
The Rockers want the Tag Team Titles and don’t care who they fight.
Harvey Wippleman brags about the Bully taking lunch money and stealing girlfriends at proms.
Bushwhackers vs. Barry Hardy/Duane Gill
The Beverly Brothers pop in to unveil the Genius as their new manager, which fits pretty well. The Bushwhackers do their wacking and stomping for about a minute and a half before Hardy grabs a headlock. That earns Gill some right hands to the floor and we wack a bit more. Some kicks in the corner set up the Battering Ram, followed by a double gutbuster for the pin on Gill at 3:45.
Rating: C-. It’s almost strange to see a match get so much time on this show. It doesn’t help that it was just an extended squash, with the stuff at the beginning taking up so much time. The Bushwhackers were never going to be anything serious, but at least they were good as a way to get the fans into things, which is what they did here.
We go to the Funeral Parlor with special guest….IRS? That’s the best you have? Bearer likes the idea of talking about DEATH and taxes and brings up the estate tax. IRS says even death is no excuse to not pay your taxes, which is kind of awesome. Bearer brings up Big Boss Man attacking wrestling, which IRS says makes him a tax cheat because he’s going after the government who taught him his trade. Bearer: “I think he’s just a hick cop from Georgia.” IRS wants RECEIPTS and walks off. This was some mixture of bizarre, stupid, and amazing.
We look at Bret Hart winning the Intercontinental Title at Summerslam. Roddy Piper praises Bret’s parents, saying Stu is a great man, even if Piper can’t understand a word he says.
Warlord vs. Mark Thomas
Slick is here with Warlord, who knocks him down to start and then hits a heck of a flying shoulder. We get the insert promo from Warlord, who wants the Intercontinental Title but settles for a knee lift to Thomas. A suplex sets up the full nelson and Thomas is done at 2:45.
Greg Valentine is going back to basics. Wait….WE’VE BEEN SEEING THE ENHANCED GREG VALENTINE???
Ted DiBiase and Sherri are upset over losing to Virgil but DiBiase seems to have a plan.
Here’s what’s coming next week to wrap it up.
Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was the usual collection of mostly meaningless stuff, but there is a lot going on here that has me intrigued. You have what feels like Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair on the horizon, plus everything that is going to come out of the wedding reception deal. Randy Savage is going to be ticked off and that makes for some great stuff. This was basically the kickoff for the post Summerslam run and that has me interested.
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