This was a comment but it’s worth mentioning to see how crazy you people can say I am.I’m going with Bayley. I can’t think of someone who is as innocent and wholesome as she is. She believes in the powers of hugs, she gives girls snap on bracelets, and the sign that she’s getting serious is cinching up her headband. Bayley is everything that a face is supposed to be, including someone who loses early to make her big comeback and win later.
And I won’t be watching it.The show started at 8 and I didn’t remember it until about 8:30. By 8:30:05, it was clear to me that I didn’t care about the show. Why would I want to spend months watching people compete to become a lower midcarder who isn’t likely to ever accomplish anything in WWE? If this was a bunch of people who had extensive training and experience in wrestling (think the Ultimate Fighter), I’d be all over it. However, when you consider one winner ever has accomplished anything significant in WWE (John Morrison, though Matt Cappotelli could have done something had it not been for his illness), it feels like a big waste of time.
Now, back to SuperBrawl 2000.
Monday Night Raw
Date: June 22, 2015
Location: Bankers Life Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole
Things have started changing again in WWE with Brock Lesnar returning last week to go establish himself as the new challenger for Seth Rollins and the World Title. Other than that we still have Sheamus waiting in the rings for the title shot, which could be the case for a long time to come. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
We open with the Beast himself and Heyman gives us a recap of what got Lesnar suspended back in the spring. This includes Rollins running from a title rematch and of course shows us Stephanie ripping off Brock’s balls because Heaven forbid we forget that. In order for Lesnar to officially return, he has to apologize to Cole and JBL. Lesnar of course doesn’t seem interested in doing so but eventually shakes JBL’s hand and rubs Cole head before shoving him into his chair.
Heyman would also like to issue an apology in advance to the chosen boy Seth Rollins. Seth was the first NXT Champion (“Gee I wonder how that happened.”) and has since been heavily protected. Now we have what’s beast for business (yes beast) because Rollins has a first class ticket to Suplex City. Brock is the once and future champion and he’s taking his title back at Battleground. This felt like the face turn promo, but it wasn’t really a turn as he left as a face.
Dean Ambrose vs. Kane
As this feud continues. Kane grabs a suplex to start and punches Ambrose in the face, followed by stomping him around the ring. Kane certainly doesn’t subscribe to the concept of mixing it up. A cross body puts Kane down and Dean follows him to the floor, only to be throw right back in. Kane sidesteps a dive and throws him into the steps as we take a break.
Back with Kane putting on a chinlock followed by a running DDT for two. Ambrose finally grabs a neckbreaker but has to stop for a nap after Kane has put everyone to sleep. Kane charges into the buckle and gets low bridged to the floor. That goes nowhere so Dean hits the rebound clothesline for two but here’s Rollins for the distraction, allowing Kane to load up the chokeslam, only to have Dean escape and hit a suicide dive. Dean goes up top and gets chokeslammed back down for the pin at 11:21.
Rating: D. So Rollins is trying to get recruits onto his side before he has to fight Lesnar and we have to sit through a boring ten minute Kane match to get the point across. Kane is just so slow and repetitive that it’s hard to stay focused during the match, let alone be entertained. Also, you couldn’t have this be a countout instead of Ambrose being pinned again?
Stills of Cena vs. Owens II.
Post break Kane sees through Seth’s plan and turns it down.
Recap of Wyatt vs. Reigns.
Prime Time Players vs. Ascension
Non-title. Titus throws Konnor around to start but everything breaks down. Viktor is tossed outside as New Day is shown watching in the back. The double teaming begins in the corner as Titus is in trouble. Konnor puts on a lame chinlock and gets suplexed down for his sloppiness. Darren gets the tag and cleans house with a northern lights suplex getting two. Titus and Konnor head outside, allowing Young to hit the Gutcheck for the pin on Viktor at 4:10.
Rating: D+. This still wasn’t anything worth seeing but it’s cool to see the champions getting a win instead of just losing every few weeks and then acting like we should still be impressed because they have the belts. The match was just there, but it’s nice to see the old formula instead of the same stuff they do all the time. Also, points to Young for really starting to become a more entertaining guy in the ring. He’s still not all that interesting but at least he’s a few steps ahead of where he used to be.
Sheamus vs. Roman Reigns
Sheamus pinned Reigns on Smackdown after Wyatt interfered. They drive each other up against the ropes to start because they’re both hosses. A slam sends Sheamus outside and Reigns slugs away back inside, only to get caught with four forearms to the chest. Sheamus throws Reigns down again and we take a break. Hopefully the break gives them some rest as this show’s action has felt like it’s in slow motion so far. Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock and hitting a running clothesline to wake the fans up a bit.
The apron boot is countered with a clothesline in a unique spot from Sheamus. He throws Reigns back first into the barricade and now Sheamus has a target. After a quick chinlock, three straight Irish Curses are good for a near fall. The Cloverleaf goes on but Reigns is quickly in the ropes. A belly to back stuns Sheamus and Reigns throws him to the floor for a whip into the table. Reigns gets back in but Wyatt pops up on screen in the middle of a tea party. He talks to someone off camera and tells Reigns to come find him. Roman bails on the match and that’s a countout at 16:40.
Rating: C+. This got going more with the back stuff at the end to give the match a story. I like that they’re giving Sheamus some wins, which really aren’t a stretch. Yeah he’s not what he used to be, but he’s still a former multiple time World Champion and a good brawler who can step up without a big stretch. Reigns is handling himself well in these longer matches too.
The camera pans back to show that Wyatt is talking to an empty rocking chair, meaning someone might have just gotten out of it.
Post break Reigns is looking for the party and finds the room, with a high group of pictures of Reigns on the wall with the eyes cut out and ANYONE BUT YOU painted on the wall. Bray can be head singing I’m A Little Teapot.
Rollins can’t get the Stooges on his side. They remember those Dumb and Dumber comments of his.
Kofi Kingston vs. Neville
Kingston jumps over Neville a few times to start but gets pulled into a headlock to slow things down. A shot to Neville’s ribs sets up a top rope ax handle as Xavier steals a camera for some pictures. Kofi is sent to the floor and knocked off the apron, drawing New Day over to go after Neville. This brings out the Prime Time Players to even things up but all four are ejected, allowing Neville to kick him in the head and hit the Red Arrow for the pin at 4:30.
Rating: C. Neville is now getting his own showcase matches as this was just about giving Neville a TV win instead of much anything else. He’s a full on midcard guy now and it’s amazing to see how smoothly his transition has gone. Kofi will be fine because he’s Kofi Kingston and is incapable of falling from his spot on the card.
King Barrett vs. Zack Ryder
Cole says that R-Truth has been thinking he’s King since beating Barrett last week. It would actually be the night before but be glad he got it that close. Ryder starts with a flapjack and corner clothesline before quickly fighting out of a chinlock. Barrett runs away from a Broski Boot but gets taken down by a baseball slide. Back inside and Ryder gets crotched on the top, setting up the Bull Hammer for the pin at 3:21.
Rating: D+. So we officially know that Ryder is beneath Barrett on the totem pole. I know it should seem obvious, but when you’re losing back to back matches to R-Truth, how clear is it? I’m all for seeing Ryder on TV more often as he’s still a fun character who can fire up the crowd, even though he loses every time he’s out there.
Owens says he was born to be in a WWE ring and wants to hurt Cena.
Here’s Cena for the first time after his attack by Owens at Money in the Bank. He holds up the title and calls it a symbol of excellence of which he is very proud. Cena recaps their feud and talks about Owens attacking him at Money in the Bank and then laying out a defenseless musician last week. Now Owens wants a US Title shot at Battleground and Cena has a choice. He could run like Owens did, or he can fight like a champion will. The answer seems to be a yes but here’s Owens to interrupt.
Kevin has been called a lot of things over the years, ranging from overweight to out of shape, but he’s someone who gets what he wants. He wanted to beat John Cena and he did, and he wanted the NXT Title and he got it. Now Owens wants the US Title and he’s going to get it, assuming Cena agrees to the title match. Owens calls himself an evil foreigner and speaks French, but Cena says the people are indifferent to Owens (no they’re not) and speaks French and Chinese. The match is on and the champ is here.
Rollins goes to the Authority to try to get some backup but HHH tells him to find it himself. Stephanie suggests getting the band back together, but HHH thinks it might cost him the title. Seth is perplexed.
Bella Twins vs. Naomi/Tamina
The Bellas have Alicia Fox in their corner. Brie takes Naomi into the corner to start so it’s quickly off to Tamina to work over Brie early on. Naomi knocks Nikki off the corner to break up a tag attempt but Brie gets over for the hot tag, meaning the Bellas are clearly wrestling as the faces here, because WWE has no idea how to book the Bellas these days. Brie hits a middle rope dropkick to Tamina, only to walk into the Rear View. The second Rear View hits Tamina by mistake, setting up the Rack Attack for the pin on Naomi at 3:44.
Terminator Genisys clip with Roman Reigns spliced in.
Ryback vs. Mark Henry
Non-title and Big Show is on commentary. Ryback throws him down to start and takes it outside right in front of Show. Henry tosses Ryback into the barricade, much to Show’s approval. Back from a break with Ryback shrugging off a chinlock and hitting the Meat Hook, followed by a top rope splash for the pin at 6:24. Not enough shown to rate but this was another match designed to set up the big match down the line. The splash looked good too.
Show glares at Henry post match.
Tough Enough preview.
Ryback is ready for anyone in the triple threat match but the title means everything to him. His parents hadn’t spoken in 15 years but his title win brought them together, even for one night. It doesn’t matter if the entire world comes after his title, because he’ll just say feed me more. Big Show comes in and mocks Ryback’s speech but Ryback is ready to fight. Ryback actually leaves him laying, shouting that Show isn’t so big now. That was a good speech by Ryback and the details he adds are a good way to make the fans connect with him.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Adam Rose
Lana is such an afterthought since she joined Ziggler. Before the match, Rose rips on the crowd and says we don’t get real art, or true love like he and Rosa have. Adam takes his time kissing Rosa and gets dropkicked in the face as Rusev is watching in the back. The referee tells Ziggler to get off Rose in the corner, allowing Adam to take him down and drop some elbows. A sleeper goes nowhere and Ziggler drops his own elbow for two. Rose goes up top and dives into a superkick for the pin at 3:05.
Rating: D. Well the match was nothing so I want to talk about Lana some more. Remember like two months ago when she was getting some of the loudest pops of the show? Well now she’s just there and does nothing during the match because we’re destined to get the same thing from Ziggler until the end of time. Rose is good in a role like this though.
Ziggler takes Lana’s hair out of the bun and kisses her, freaking Rusev out again. He throws his crutches and falls down because of the bad ankle. Summer Rae of all people comes up and hands him a crutch.
The Authority has a meeting in the back with Noble saying he and Mercury are wise like Yoda. HHH says the Stooges know Rollins better than anyone and Stephanie wants the two of them and Kane to hear Rollins out.
Here’s Seth to try to get his backup back. He calls out Kane and the Stooges, but insists that this has nothing to do with Brock Lesnar. This is about the three of them and family. Rollins apologizes to all three of them and asks him to be part of his family again. Kane gets a special apology because he isn’t a dinosaur (Seth: “They’re extinct and you’re alive and well.”) and is Seth’s favorite WWE Superstar of all time.
They don’t seem to accept so Seth gets close to begging until Lesnar interrupts. Kane loads up the elbow pad and Lesnar jumps to the apron, but the three of them leave Seth all alone. Kane and the Stooges try to go after Lesnar but they’re easily fought off because they’re Kane and the Stooges (I knew they should have gone with Iggy), leaving Brock to bust out the Germans to a huge face reaction.
Kane breaks up the F5 with a chokeslam but it’s time for the Big Bald to take a German of his own. This time it’s a Kane chop block breaking up another F5 to Rollins, who adds a chop block of his own. They bend the knee around the post and crack it with a chair to finally have Brock in some trouble. Brock tries to fight back but Mercury comes in to leg dive him, allowing Kane to put him back down. The springboard knee to the head sets up another chokeslam, followed by a Pedigree to leave Lesnar laying as the show ends.
Overall Rating: C. I really liked the way this show was laid out for the most part. A lot of the matches were bigger names getting wins over lower level acts, which doesn’t hurt anyone involved and lets you advance stories a few more steps without blowing something big or making anyone look weak. Ascension, Ryder and Rose losing does nothing to hurt them but the people that beat them get to look successful. That’s smart, logical booking.
The rest of the show was……well it was there. It wasn’t bad or anything but this felt like a very long three hours. There are a lot of issues in WWE and to be fair to them, you can tell when they’re trying and just run out of ideas/get bogged down by the time. That’s what happened here as they really didn’t have three hours of meaningful television in them and the show would have been much better at two hours. There was enough good to carry this show though and that’s a big improvement over some of the stuff we’ve been getting in recent weeks.
Results
Kane b. Dean Ambrose – Chokeslam from the top rope
Prime Time Players b. Ascension – Gutcheck to Viktor
Sheamus b. Roman Reigns via countout
Neville b. Kofi Kingston – Red Arrow
King Barrett b. Zack Ryder – Bull Hammer
Bella Twins b. Naomi/Tamina – Rack Attack to Naomi
Ryback b. Mark Henry – Top rope splash
Dolph Ziggler b. Adam Rose – Superkick
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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After all the pay per views in the span of a few weeks, this show marks the beginning of a recently unthinkable FIVE WEEK build to Battleground. The big stories are Sheamus now holding the Money in the Bank briefcase and fellow heel Seth Rollins retaining the World Title last night in a long ladder match against Dean Ambrose. This means that Rollins won a major match on his own. I wonder if we’ll hear about that tonight. Let’s get to it.
Before we get started, there was one last tribute to Dusty Rhodes. Yeah it’s the same one, but Dusty deserves as many as WWE wants to give him.
The main story throughout the night was the Authority picking the next challenger to Seth’s title. This means that people were trying to impress them all night, because the Authority are the king and queen of WWE and the wrestlers are all just their playthings, sent out there to dance and perform at the Authority’s will. Throughout the night there were people having regular matches which for some reason meant more, even though it’s almost never someone you see earlier in the night because WWE has gotten very, very stale in its format. We’ll get to the next challenger at the end.
Rollins came out for his big victory speech and bragged about being that much better than Ambrose. They’re doing a great job of keeping Ambrose from beating Rollins and when he finally does, which he will one day, it’s going to be a big moment. As Rollins took all the credit (literally thanking himself over and over in a great heel touch), Ambrose came out and cleaned house, saying he wasn’t leaving the ring until he got another fight against Rollins. This went on for awhile until Sheamus came out for a fight, eventually losing to a rollup. Why would you ever want to win something in WWE? It almost guarantees a losing streak.
Case in point: R-Truth beat King Barrett for the second time in two days, this time in about twenty seconds. Barrett beat him down post match and talked about how serious this was to him. I’m picturing Barrett running around talking about how TOTALLY IMPORTANT it is that he’s a king while everyone else laughs at him, because that’s how interesting wrestlers are treated around here.
Kevin Owens bragged, Dolph Ziggler challenged him to a non-title match, Owens beat Ziggler in the same match Ziggler has had for the last year. In case you can’t tell, I really, really do not care about Dolph Ziggler. Word on the street is that he was about to leave the company and I can’t say I’m complaining.
Paige tried to get the Divas to help her fight the Bellas but this somehow tied into the Authority and the rest of the division not wanting to get on their bad side. This is pretty clearly setting up some NXT callups and I’m terrified of what might happen to them. The Bellas beat Paige in a handicap match later in the show.
Sheamus helped Kane beat Orton in a nothing match. This was supposed to make me think Kane is a viable contender to Rollins. That’s hilarious, if not a bit stupid.
With an unintentional assist from Ryback, Miz beat Big Show via countout. This was fine as a quick help to the three way feud.
Roman Reigns wanted to fight Bray Wyatt, but Bray did his usual freaky promo before holding up a picture of Reigns playing with his daughter. See, that’s at least that’s a specific thing for Wyatt, who usually only speaks in riddles. It’s a baby step, but at least a step.
Machine Gun Kelly, a rapper I’ve only heard of through WWE, rapped for the better part of eternity and was then beaten up by Kevin Owens. That alone made the way too long performance worth it as Owens is one of the coolest heels in a very, very long time.
Neville/Prime Time Players beat the New Day in a fun six man. It’s good to see Neville added into a feud so he has something to do instead of just floating from match to match.
The big reveal was, of course, Brock Lesnar, which opens up a ton of storyline plotholes but his Suplex City/Exit F5 shirt more than made up for it. A few of these plot holes:
1. Cole’s lawsuit, which isn’t so much a plot hole as they addressed it on WWE.com, but they really need to mention it on Raw. It just needs to be a quick line of “we settled it out of court” but it needs to be said on TV.
2. After Stephanie freaked out of Lesnar and sent him away because she hadn’t captured a good set of balls in a long time, they’re just bringing him back to beat up their guy? Is this supposed to be a test? Or are they dumping Rollins to go with Lesnar, who was all insane and violent and nowhere near as controllable as Rollins?
3. What if Rollins wins? Is he supposed to just say “yeah it’s cool Authority. I don’t mind you throwing the biggest, baddest monster ever. What are we doing for dinner tonight?”
Overall this show was about setting up Battleground, which again has the potential to be one of the more entertaining shows in a long time. Granted a lot of that is due to Brock, but that’s why you bring him in. I wasn’t wild on the story of wondering who the opponent was going to be because Lesnar really wasn’t all that shocking. Still though, good enough show which wasn’t the same old repetitive stuff we’ve seen time after time. There are some plot holes that have to be addressed however, but you can do that in just a few quick promos.
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Landel was an interesting case as he was a self proclaimed Ric Flair tribute wrestler, down to the same look (plus about 50lbs), style, robes and finishing move. However, he had a lot of drug issues over the years which stopped his pushes several times. He was talented enough to be a solid midcard guy though and had some solid matches and runs back in the 80s.
Early word says that it was a car accident which Landel came home from, but was later found unresponsive.
Money in the Bank was always going to be a different kind of show as they had to fly through the build do to the lack of time. However, it was also helpful as we didn’t have to sit through a month of people just fighting each other for no reason other than they would be in a contest determined by completely different means of winning. Let’s get to it.
We’ll get the biggest deal out of the way first: this show took place just a few days after the passing of the American Dream Dusty Rhodes. The show opened with a touching tribute as the roster came on stage to have the bell rung ten times, followed by Dusty’s famous theme music being played one last time. This is one of the few wrestling deaths that actually got to me, which is surprising as I never cared much for Rhodes over the years. However, it’s always good to see WWE give their heroes the kind of treatment they deserve.
However, there’s also some really stupid stuff to get through, starting with the pre-show match. R-Truth beat King Barrett because that’s what almost everyone does to Barrett. In theory this leads to Truth as the self professed King and Barrett running around saying “NO! I’M THE REAL KING!”, because he hasn’t been embarrassed enough yet. I’m not sure when we reach that point, but I’m scared to think of how bad it could get for him.
They started the regular matches off fast with the Money in the Bank ladder match, consisting of Sheamus, Randy Orton, Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston, Roman Reigns, Neville and Kane. Sheamus won in what was actually a pretty big surprise, meaning it was time for people to criticize it. However, let’s take a quick look at why Sheamus was at worst the second best option to win.
Neville – Not ready
Kane – Will you be serious?
Kofi Kingston – The longest of long shots but never a real contender
Dolph Ziggler – Dead in the water for months if not years now and potentially leaving in the near future. This would have been the weakest choice imaginable as Ziggler isn’t a main event guy anymore.
That leaves us with three options.
Randy Orton is always a possibility, but we’ve seen Orton vs. Rollins how many times now? He would have been a good fall back option, but it feels like something we’ve seen so many times now that there’s nothing to rehash.
Roman Reigns was definitely the heavy favorite but let’s imagine the reaction if he wins. “Man, WWE never mixes things up anymore.” “Reigns wins, just like everyone knew he would.” “Can we get a surprise for once?” Well that’s what we got, as Bray Wyatt remembered he had a reason to be mad at Reigns and interfered to cost him the match.
That leaves Sheamus, nearly through process of elimination. He may not be the most exciting option, but at least he’s a former World Champion and has been doing well enough in the new heel role. If this leads to him taking over the Authority enforcer role from Big Show/Kane, it’s certainly a plus. If Sheamus wins he’ll be little more than a transitional champion, but he gets a recharge out of it. I see little problem here, but I’m sure I’ll be told why he’s so boring and all that, meaning I’ll point out why doing the obvious Reigns win wouldn’t have been much more interesting.
The match itself was the expected good Money in the Bank match, but as usual there were too many people in there. It lead to a bunch of sitting around for people, with Ziggler especially taking long rests outside on the floor instead of going for the briefcase. I could go for taking this down to five people or so and letting there be some drama instead of just piling the same spots we see every time. It’s still entertaining though.
Nikki Bella beat Paige to retain the title with that big forearm after the referee caught the Bellas cheating because that’s how the match was scheduled to end instead of having the ending that actually follows the rules of wrestling. The match was actually good stuff as they had the longest title match since 2006 and the match worked accordingly. That’s a telling sign going forward, but that being said, how many Divas would be able to survive a five minute match, let alone over eleven? Nikki is getting better but this Bellas storyline is long past its expiration date.
Ryback and Big Show did an average power match until Miz ran in to make it a three way feud, which is clearly what they’ve wanted to do the entire time. Why they didn’t just MAKE IT THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE is anyone’s guess, but I’d assume it has something to do with wanting to stretch feuds out for the sake of stretching them out because they think just waiting means building a story.
Cena vs. Owens II was outstanding, just as you would expect it to be. I liked it better than the first match but I won’t put up much of an argument if you liked the first one better. The key here though was Owens’ post match attack on Cena, as he continues to be the best heel in the company by just being a jerk that thinks he’s better than everyone else. Yeah he’ll run when it’s not his time, but when the bell rings, he’ll go toe to toe with anyone.
That’s what makes all the chicken heels annoying: it’s clear WWE knows how to book another style but they just don’t. Owens could be in the title picture tomorrow if they wanted him to be, but I’m sure it’s time for a gimmick match with Cena because that’s what they do.
The Prime Time Players took the Tag Team Titles from the New Day in a surprising upset. However, the more you think about it, the more you think about it, the more it makes sense. This was the first time New Day was in a standard tag match (due to Kofi’s injuries in the ladder match) and they lost the belts. It makes sense, which is why it’s so surprising that WWE actually went with it.
The main event saw WWE World Champion Seth Rollins beat Dean Ambrose in a very, very long ladder match. This was a very solid option for a main event, but I’m hoping they take a break from Ambrose vs. Rollins for a while. It was a long, brutal match but the comebacks got a bit too much to handle near the end. They could have cut five minutes out of the match to make it a bit better, though it was still an excellent match with some great drama. When you can make me believe that something I know won’t happen might happen, you’re having a good match.
Overall, Money in the Bank was exactly what I was expecting it to be, which made for an entertaining show. The ladder matches were always going to be fun, meaning they were more than carrying the show. That leaves you with anything else as a bonus, which consisted of a fun Divas match and an outstanding rematch between Owens and Cena. For a show thrown together in two weeks and the third in seven or so weeks, that’s quite impressive.
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So I was at the Half Price Bookstore (praise be its name) and four a nice selection of reasonably priced wrestling books earlier in the week. Five days later and I’ve read them all so it’s time for some quick recaps.
The first three are all by my, for lack of a better word, mentor Scott Keith, who has been doing what I do for about 20 years now. He wrote a bunch of books back in the day and here are a handful of them.
First up we have The Buzz On Professional Wrestling from 2001, which is more like a textbook for newcomers. It maps out the basic ideas of the major wrestling companies and professional wrestling in general. This was about 99.9% recaps for me and would be for most people reading this, but it’s designed to be mainly the basics, which is an interesting concept.
Second was Wrestling’s One Ring Circus from 2004, which is much more focused on a single period. In this case, the focus is on the time period from the InVasion up through Wrestlemania XIX, breaking down each time period and all major points in between. This was a quick read and is meant as more of a mockery of HHH and Stephanie during this period, but there are definitely some valid criticisms of a time period that not a lot of people are fans of. It’s also interesting to see John Cena mentioned as a young potential star without the tongue planted firmly in cheek.
Finally from Mr. Keith we have 2006’s Wrestling’s Made Men, which is the same concept as One Ring Circus but focusing on post Wrestlemania XIX up through mid 2005. In this case it’s a collection of pay per view recaps with extra details filled in. This isn’t as interesting of a time but there is definitely a lot of stuff worth checking out in it.
Finally overall we have a more traditional wrestling book with Bill Watts’ The Cowboy and the Cross. Watts is one of the more controversial figures in wrestling history as he’s a very old school guy who pushed Mid-South to a very impressive place in wrestling. He’s one of the few bookers who was destroyed by a force completely outside his control (the collapse of the Texas oil industry), but that style didn’t exactly work well in WCW.
The problem with Watts is he comes off as someone who has almost never been wrong in his entire life and seemed to have every great idea in the history of the business. If someone disagreed with him as a talent, it was time to throw hands and no one ever beat Watts. Like ever, including Verne Gagne, who would rather back down that fight him.
He also loved Danny Hodge at a level that is probably unhealthy. Don’t get me wrong: Danny Hodge is one of the toughest men to ever live and probably the only wrestler who could defeat Kurt Angle in a shoot (note that I said could, not would), but you would think he cured cancer, invented pizza and single handedly got the Kardashians off TV and Justin Bieber deported to Mars.
Overall though, Watts is definitely someone whose story is worth reading, though you should take some of it with a grain of salt. He comes off as one of those guys who was successful, but I have some issues with a few of his stories. Also, there are some moments where he doesn’t do himself any favors shaking the stereotypes of being a bit of a chauvinist and racist, but it’s not the worst in the world.
One final note: a lot of his book is dedicated to talking about his Christianity. I have zero issue with that and always enjoy hearing someone talk about it, but there comes a point where even I was thinking “good grief man, we get it already.” The book is worth checking out for some of the details on stuff, but like I said, some of the stuff he takes full or even majority credit for sound a bit shaky.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Ring of Honor
Date: June 17, 2015
Location: Ted Reeve Arena, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, King Corino
It’s week three of Global Wars and this show will feature the debuts of some major New Japan stars. The big story continues to be the battle of the Jays as Lethal and Briscoe get ready for their showdown at Best in the World 2015. There’s only one more week after this before we get to something fresh so let’s get to it.
We open with……the opening sequence. Makes sense.
Decade vs. War Machine
War Machine is Hanson/Ray Rowe, a pair of monsters who look like vikings with foot long beards. Decade is BJ Whitmer/Adam Page here. The fans tell Whitmer to shut up but he reminds them that the microphone is a lot louder than they are. Whitmer doesn’t think King Corino learned his lesson a few weeks back, so Colby Corino, who remember is 18 years old and might weigh 180lbs, is his replacement.
Rowe starts with Page, who immediately tags in Colby. Corino gets right in Rowe’s face and slaps him, setting up a tag to Hanson. Rowe tags out and a big side slam plants Colby down. Back to Rowe for a nice backbreaker into a gutbuster into a powerbomb on Colby. Rowe throws Colby over to Page but Page won’t tag. A belly to back suplex/guillotine legdrop finally ends Corino at 2:12. This was an angle instead of a match and I’m starting to get into this, even though I’m not entirely familiar with Corino vs. the Decade’s backstory.
Here’s Cedric Alexander, who has been on a losing streak lately after being billed as a breakout star last year. He has to start getting some wins, and he wants to start with the undefeated Moose. Here’s his chance.
Moose vs. Cedric Alexander
Moose has Stokely Hathaway and the very lovely Veda Scott. Cedric’s dropkick has little effect as the huge Moose slams him down but misses a splash. They head outside with Cedric escaping a slam and sending Moose into the post. Back in and Moose hits a nice dropkick of his own to put Alexander on the floor and us on a break. We come back with Cedric hitting a big dive to the floor, followed by a nice springboard tornado DDT for two.
That’s not cool with Moose who takes his head off with a hard clothesline, followed by some hard chops. Cedric comes right back with a bunch of dropkicks in the corner but Moose spears him down. Both guys are in trouble and Veda slips Moose a wrench. He isn’t interested in using it, so Cedric takes it away and blasts Moose in the head for the pin, giving Moose his first loss at 9:05.
Rating: D+. The match was back and forth but what in the world are they thinking with the booking? Moose is less than a week away from a #1 contenders three way on pay per view and you give him his first loss on the go home show? This is a very bad choice in booking and they really need to think these things out. I do not get this, but I’m assuming it leads to Veda leaving Moose.
Matt Sydal/ACH vs. Tetsuya Naito/Hiroshi Tanahashi
Sydal is formerly known as Evan Bourne, ACH is a high flier and Tanahashi is basically the John Cena of Japan. The Japanese guys won’t shake hands to start, in theory making them heels here, even though an ROH crowd isn’t going to boo a star like Tanahashi. Sydal and Tanahashi trade go behinds to start until Matt takes him down for a standing moonsault. A double tag brings in Naito and ACH with the fans being split. They take their time to start until Naito slugs him down in the corner to take over.
ACH avoids a clothesline and does some unnecessary flips before dropkicking Naito in the face. Tanahashi knees ACH in the back and throws him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Tanahashi missing a middle rope swanton but still preventing a hot tag. We hit the chinlock from Naito as I’m struggling to find things to say here. There’s no real story here other than company vs. company and the announcers aren’t giving me any information about any of the four guys.
Naito sends him into the corner for a basement dropkick. ACH finally counters a hurricanrana and makes the hot tag to Sydal, who comes in to clean house. In a nice counter, Sydal loads up the standing moonsault but Tanahashi is waiting on him with a German suplex. ACH fires off a bunch of kicks to Tanahashi and a clothesline for two. A German suplex from ACH gets the same and he mocks Tanahashi’s air guitar. Tanahashi puts on his Texas cloverleaf but Naito tagged himself in. Granted the referee didn’t seem to notice, leaving ACH to have to grab a rope.
The New Japan guys break up Sydal’s Asai moonsault but ACH hits a big dive to take both of them down. Back in and ACH hits a kind of springboard downward spiral to Tanahashi, followed by Sydal’s shooting star for two. Now it’s ACH going up top for a 450 but Tanahashi seemingly got the knees up. A sling blade sets up the High Fly Flow (frog splash) to give Hiroshi the pin at 11:12.
Rating: C+. Fun match but it got a bit messy near the end. I still don’t get why they’re trying to make all the Japanese guys heels when they’re naturally faces for the most part, especially with fans like the ROH crowd. Still though, good enough match here and it got the crowd going like it was supposed to.
It’s time for the contract signing, as run by ROH match maker Nigel McGuinness. TV Champion Jay Lethal is up first with World Champion Jay Briscoe following him up. Briscoe is flanked by his brother Mark and for a pair of rednecks, I’m really not feeling shirts with Twitter handles on the front. Both guys sign up and McGuinness talks about how this is the biggest match in ROH history.
Lethal would love to flip the table and beat Briscoe down right now, but he’d rather have Briscoe at his best. Notice that Lethal repeats the date of the show instead of just saying “at Best in the World”. Briscoe promises to beat Lethal so bad that Lethal has to become Black Machismo again and those are fighting words. The belts are held up for a big jawing session to end the show.
Overall Rating: C+. I’m looking forward to getting through this Global Wars stuff as it’s really taking away from the ongoing stories. Instead of a bunch of Ring of Honor stuff, we’re getting a meaningless series of matches which don’t make either promotion look better than the other. They did a good go home build to the title vs. title match though, which I liked a lot better than anything else on the series so far. Good episode, but I’m looking forward to the first regular ROH show.
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Two buddies of mine run it and I got to be the first guest. There’s a lot of talk about current wrestling, but a good chunk is dedicated to the WrestleZone Forums E-Fed, where you create your own character, write up a promo for him, and then a panel of judges decides whose promo was better (yours or your opponent’s) and writes up a match between your characters. In this episode, I critique the e-fed a bit and talk about various things going on in wrestling today, ranging from the Bullet Club to Lucha Underground to WWE to the required ripping on TNA. Check these guys out as one of them is well read and the other……well he tries.
Thunder
Date: January 26, 2000
Location: MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 6,323
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson, Mike Tenay
We have a new World Champion in Sid Vicious but something tells me we’re in for some shenanigans. In other news tonight, Terry Funk has promised to bring in reinforcements against Kevin Nash. I’m sure this has nothing to do with Arn Anderson talking to some guy named Champ who needed to be told to put on his pants. Let’s get to it.
In case you were wondering, of the 6,323 in attendance, 2,510 were paid.
Quick recap of Nitro’s World Title situation.
Gene calls out Sid for a chat to start. Sid must be on top of the world and talks about standing up for WCW on Monday. Well no one did for almost all of the NWO civil war (including Schiavone) so better late than never I guess. The NWO tried to block the powerbomb and he was still able to win anyway because it wasn’t meant for the NWO to win every single match. That kind of thinking would get you fired back in 1997.
Cue Nash and the NWO with the boss saying this is one of the things he hates about being commissioner. As commissioner, he has to abide by the stipulations and the one from Monday was that Sid had to beat Ron Harris. He shows us a clip of Sid using the powerbomb, which hadn’t been banned at that point in the show, and pinning the wrong Harris brother. Now we get to the stupid part: the clip continues to show Sid being counted out of the ring because the match against Ron never actually ended because Sid didn’t pin him. Therefore, Sid didn’t win.
So on Monday, the referee counted Sid out and had the decision announced, and THE SAME ANNOUNCE TEAM DIDN’T SEE THE NEED TO BRING THIS UP??? I get that some things have to be done differently in wrestling and you have to suspend some disbelief, but this goes into “there is no way someone could possibly be this stupid” territory. Anyway, since Sid didn’t win on Monday, the World Champion is…..Kevin Nash.
However, tonight Sid will have a chance to get the title back inside Caged Heat against Ron Harris and Nash himself. However, the powerbomb is still banned and Sid has to pin Nash. Why Nash would do that isn’t clear, but then again this is two title changes, Hell in a Cell and another World Title match in two days so I really shouldn’t be surprised.
Gene reminds Maestro that he has never performed here at the MGM Grand. Maestro is offended and Symphony actually says “how rude”. Ok then.
The NWO has slot machines delivered to their locker room.
Maestro vs. Norman Smiley
Maestro comes out with his usual piano…..and Norman brings out a team of Las Vegas showgirls. The girls dance to the ring with Norman, who of course is wearing a white tuxedo and top hat because he’s awesome like that, and do the spanking dance. Maestro jumps him from behind because he’s a cultural swine. Smiley gets in a chair shot and it’s already time for a ladder, which fits so well here for some reason.
The whip is reversed though and Maestro sends Norman face first into the ladder and it’s time to go backstage. I’m going on a limb and assuming this is hardcore. Just thinking out loud of course. Norman is whipped into a bunch of things and then through a table as they find a sarcophagus. Well of course they do. Inside is…..the Kiss Demon, because demons live in coffins right? Norman is terrified and passes out so the Maestro covers him for the pin. It’s not long enough to rate, but that may have been the most insane match I’ve seen this year and it didn’t even run two minutes. That says a lot.
The NWO gambles a lot.
Liz and Luger have Sting memorabilia
Cruiserweight Title Tournament First Round: The Artist Formerly Known As Prince Iaukea vs. Kid Romeo
Just like on Nitro, Romeo starts fast and hits a quick Thesz press and sends Prince over the corner and out to the floor for a meeting with Paisley. They slug it out on the floor as Standards and Practices, in street clothes this week, are here with Ms. Hancock, who certainly isn’t in street clothes. Well maybe on certain streets but not the most common ones.
Back inside and they slug it out as Hancock sits on the announcers’ table. Romeo hits a spinwheel kick followed by an enziguri and a missile dropkick for two with Paisley offering a distraction. Romeo goes after her and gets nailed in the back, setting up a reverse suplex to send Prince to the second round. Can we see a bracket to this thing?
Jeff Jarrett hits on 18 and gets a 3 for 21.
Terry Funk vs. Kiss Demon
Yes, this is a thing that is happening. They slug it out to start (did you expect anything less?) and Funk takes over with some very lame headbutts. Some boot choking in the corner leads to Funk being thrown outside but he whips Demon into the barricade, because Terry Funk is the second biggest face in this company after Sid Vicious. Back in and Funk gets annoyed that his neckbreaker only gets two, so he takes a swing at the yellow bellied varmint Nick Patrick. Again, your hero in this match.
A low blow and butterfly suplex get two for Demon, because when you think of a demon, you think of butterflies and suplexes. Funk ducks a right hand and busts out the Tumbleweed, which you may know as Kiwi Roll. Basically it’s a rolling sunset flip with Funk literally rolling him around in a circle before stopping for the pin.
Rating: D. Terry Funk, the second biggest face in this company, just had a match with the Kiss Demon. I want to hate this idea, but at least he’s interacting with the younger guys. For some reason I can’t imagine Nash actually knowing that the Demon wrestles for this company or that he’s a character that actually exists. Points to Funk for that at least. And I do mean least.
Kidman vs. Vampiro
Rematch from Nitro where Kidman won a good match. Vampiro starts fast with a headlock and shoulder, followed by a pair of suplexes. This would seem to be your fast paced wrestling match of the night. I’m as shocked as you are that Kidman is in this role yet again. Kidman’s right hands in the corner don’t work that well and Vampiro sends him outside and then into the barricade. So Vampiro is a face but acting heelish here. Got it.
Back in and Vampiro’s top rope spinwheel kick (a face move) gets two, followed by Kidman’s hurricanrana for the same. More kicks from Vampiro look to set up an electric chair but Kidman victory rolls him for not a victory. YOU CAN’T POWERBOMB KIDMAN but he can bulldog you, only to have Vampiro crotch him on top for a super Nail in the Coffin for the pin.
Rating: C+. This has been another show where Kidman has the match of the night and I’m sure it’s going to continue to get him nowhere. Well other than with Torrie but that’s a different story. He’s still fun to watch but you can add him to the list of people in WCW whose talents are being wasted while we get more Sid vs. Nash.
Some cops investigate gambling allegations against the NWO and there’s a Wayne Newton look a like. This goes nowhere.
Total Package vs. Buff Bagwell
My levels of apathy towards Bagwell continue to reach new bounds. Buff takes over with a slam to start and we’re already on the posing. I’m surprised they even bothered with a move to start. Luger knees him in the ribs but eats right hands in the corner, only to come back with an atomic drop.
Two Lex clotheslines lead to more posing and it’s time to choke a lot. An elbow gets two and an elbow gets two and then Luger charges into an elbow. I’ve heard of someone being all elbows but a match being one? A low blow stops Buff’s comeback but Buff is up first and does his usual generic offense. The Blockbuster connects but Liz comes in with the ball bat for the DQ.
Rating: D-. Good grief fire both of them. Luger somehow has even less of an offense than when he wasn’t trying and Bagwell is getting even less entertaining than he already was. I guess it’s time for Luger to start breaking everyone’s arm in an attempt to make him an interesting killer but for some reason I don’t see it working. These two fought WAY too many times over the years.
Post match Luger gets in more bat shots and goes to Pillmanize the arm but referees make the save.
3 Count had an autograph signing at the Nitro Grill when the Mamalukes came up and started a fight. Music haters.
3 Count vs. Mamalukes/Disco Inferno
We start with a performance but the band has to dropkick the Mamalukes off the apron. Some big dives take the Italians out again and Shane covers Vito for two to start. Shane hammers away in the corner but gets powerbombed out and kicked in the face for his efforts. Off to Johnny for several lifts on a military press, followed by Disco coming in to stomp away in the corner.
The middle rope elbow misses though and it’s off to Evan. I’m not sure what to think about four dancers being in the same match. Fandango must have been watching this show. Evan speeds things up and cleans the bottom half of the house before it’s off to Shannon as everything breaks down. The double hiptoss into a powerbomb plants Moore though, setting up the Last Dance from Disco for the pin.
Rating: D+. Nothing to see here and it’s nice to see the champions get another win, even if it’s at the expense of 3 Count. Yes they’re stupid but they were so goofily entertaining that I can’t help but like them. Disco is starting to find his groove as the manager/occasional partner too, which is good for him as he deserves a little something.
Post match Vito sings some Sinatra as the other two dance. This brings out David Flair, Crowbar and Daffney to clean house, allowing Crowbar to play air guitar as the others……dance?
Funk and Anderson are looking for Sid. I really hope this isn’t revenge for London back in 1993.
This Week in WCW Motorsports.
Nash gives the roster a pep talk. Quote: “Let’s go out there and put the old guys over!”
Booker T. vs. Jerry Flynn
Booker has to be able to win this right? Like, he has to. Jerry jumps him from behind to start and knocks Booker over the barricade. Please don’t make Booker a hardcore guy. Jerry fires off a bunch of kicks inside but misses another one in the corner. Booker hits his signature kicks and the forearm, followed by the 110th Street Slam (whipping spinebuster) for the quick pin. Thank goodness.
Anderson and Funk have a meeting with Sid.
Ernest Miller reminds us that he’s here and talks about loving Vegas to get the fans on his side….but then says he hates the people here. After some old school calling out a fat boy fan, it’s time to dance. Disco, 3 Count, Ernest Miller. The money in this company is a dance team gimmick.
Kimberly says she’s still friends with Buff even though she counted him down last week.
Nash has a meeting with the Harris Brothers in the back.
Finlay and Knobbs hug for some reason, allowing Knobbs to steal a wrench from Finlay’s pocket. You would think Finlay would notice it missing.
Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Fit Finlay
Winner gets a shot at Knobbs for the Hardcore Title, which shows Knobbs to be a coward by stealing the wrench. My goodness why does the Hardcore Title have a better story than the US Title? Finlay grabs a headlock to start but his shoulder block has no effect. Back up and Bigelow splashes him in the corner as we see Knobbs watching from the back. Finlay gets tired of selling and rolls outside to set up a table.
An attempt at a suplex over the ropes and through the table is easily countered, allowing Bigelow to go up, only to miss the headbutt. It should be wrench times but Knobbs is a thief (maybe he can get a job in the criminal field once the wrestling thing stops working for him), Bigelow hits Greetings From Asbury Park (pretend Finlay’s head hit the mat) for the pin.
The cage is lowered.
WCW World Title: Sid Vicious vs. Ron Harris vs. Kevin Nash
Inside Caged Heat, meaning the Cell and anyone can win but Sid must beat Nash. Also the powerbomb is banned. Nash is defending and Ron is in a suit. We again see the clip from Nitro which no one bothered to reference because WCW announcers are off having ham sandwiches and finger painting during commercials. The cage is chained shut as Harris and Nash double team Sid like you would expect them to do.
They head to the floor with Sid being knocked around the ring and Nash driving him into the cage wall. It works so well that Nash does it again twice in a row as this is total domination, as you would expect. For no apparent reason, Nash and Harris go inside for a few seconds before coming back outside to choke with a TV cable. They go inside again and, as in every triple threat ever, the two in control argue over who gets to cover.
Sid fights back for a bit until Nash gets in a shot to the ribs to take over. They head outside again with Sid going into the cage for I think the fifth time. We get some blood from the arm but Sid finally blocks a ram into the steel and takes over again. Harris is thrown inside for a chokeslam (with Ron landing on his arm) and Sid pulls Nash down into a Crossface of all things for the win and his second World Title in three days and the seventh World Title change in nine days.
Rating: D-. I don’t know if that’s meant as a knock on Benoit or just WCW trying to be cute, but I can’t help but shake the idea that Nash would have never tapped to Benoit in a million years. This was just a step ahead of Kidman vs. the Wall inside the Cell, though it still ranks as probably the second worst Cell match of all time. There was no need for this to be in the cage, especially not two days after the first match. Also, odds on the submission not counting because Nash said Sid had to pin him?
Ric Flair of all people comes out to applaud Sid, which is called a passing of the torch.
Overall Rating: D. This company has gone from slow as molasses one week to WOULD YOU PLEASE SLOW DOWN the next week. Things are going way too fast in the World Title scene and it’s getting harder and harder to keep up and/or care at this point. Flair is a welcome sight as you know he’ll be at least solid if not very good. There’s good stuff on the show but the gap between the main event and midcard isn’t going anywhere. Welcome back to 1998.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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