Thought of the Day: Benoit and Modern Wrestling
This
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10. Austin Aries vs. Bobby Roode – Destination X
This was a match where the build to the match worked better than the overall match, even though the match itself was quite good. The story behind the match was Aries cashing in the X Title to get a guaranteed world title match here. This is where things got interesting, as you had Aries as the unbeatable X Division Champion facing the longest reigning world champion in company history. The idea was simple: take two guys who are perceived as unbeatable and put them in a match. The fact that the match was great helped a lot too.
9. Big Show vs. Sheamus – Hell in a Cell
This makes the list for the simple reason of how shocking it was. By shocking, I mean people were expecting a horrible match but we got a great showdown instead. Sheamus playing the giant killer worked very well for him as he’s strong enough to be able to move Show around, but at the same time he’s small enough to make Show’s offense look good. This turned into the heavyweight slugfest, as in a match where both guys use their biggest power moves possible and the last man standing wins. Those can get very fun in a hurry, and this got excellent by the ending.
8. John Cena vs. The Rock – Wrestlemania 28
This isn’t on here for the match, but rather the buildup. Cena vs. Rock was one of the only matches ever where I knew it would be good, but no matter how good it was I absolutely had to see it. I don’t recall a match ever before where that happened other than maybe Rock vs. Austin II. The match itself is very good but I wouldn’t call it great. Cena losing is still a questionable move, but it’s not the worst decision of all time. On top of that, a match that draws a million PPV buys has to be doing something right.
7. CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan – Over the Limit
The idea here is simple: take two guys that can work almost any style and give them 25 minutes. The match was good and the fans reacted to it. I don’t have much else here because I actually don’t remember much of the match, but the ratings I have for it seem to say I really liked it, so here’s a spot for it.
6. Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus – Extreme Rules
This was another war, with Sheamus’ arm being such a factor that you couldn’t tell if he was going to survive or not. This wasn’t really a rematch but rather the first match between them, as the first match is the infamous 18 seconds match. It was 2/3 falls because that’s EXTREME of course. These two beat the tar out of each other and it turned into an incredibly entertaining match. This match was also a part of the eventual Daniel Bryan anger management story, as he snapped in the first fall and kicked Sheamus long enough for a DQ. I like Sheamus a lot and this match was a good example of why.
5. James Storm vs. Bobby Roode – Lockdown
This was a bloodbath and seemingly the perfect blowoff for this feud. Naturally since this is TNA the feud continued over the summer and finally ended at Bound For Glory, but that’s another story. The majority of the match was an excellent brawl with both guys bleeding like crazy. Storm kept beating on Roode until he couldn’t take anymore, but the superkick knocked Roode out of the cage to keep the title on him. The problem of the match at the end of the day was there was no reason for Roode to keep the title here other than to extend the feud. If this was the blowoff, it likely would have cracked the top three.
4. Shield vs. HELL NO/Ryback – Tables Ladders and Chairs (TLC Match)
That’s likely high for this match but it blew my mind at TLC. This was the Shield’s debut match and to say they delivered is the understatement of the year. It was a 25 minute war between six guys that looked like they wanted to maim each other. There were some huge spots, with the biggest one being Rollins going off the huge ladder and into a pile of tables, somehow without breaking his neck.
On top of that, the psychology was excellent here. The idea behind the match was Shield pounding down one guy at a time, giving them a 3-2 advantage at any given time. This was played up for the entirety of the match and it worked very well throughout. The match was all about a (non) blood feud and it came off feeling like a war rather than a match. On top of that, the idea of it being pinfall or submission made things even better. I’m surprised I rated this so high actually.
3. Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk – Wrestlemania 28
If this wasn’t on this card, it would have been the best match of the night by far. This was built upon the Punk is Drunk story with Jericho pushing the idea that Punk is an addict no matter how straightedge he is. This set Punk off, setting up a war here. Much like Wrestlemania 25 though, they decided that if the champion got disqualified, he would lose the title. In other words, we need a 22 minute wrestling match from Chris Jericho and CM Punk.
What followed was a classic, with both guys showing some insane psychology and the finish coming from Punk hooking the Anaconda Vice for the second time. Earlier in the match, Jericho had kneed Punk in the head to escape the hold, so to end the match, Punk leaned his head forward to prevent the knees. I’m a huge fan of people learning during the match and adapting to it later to win. Excellent match here.
T-1. Undertaker vs. HHH – Wrestlemania 28 (Hell in a Cell)
T-1. Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena – Extreme Rules (Extreme Rules)
I tried and tried but I can’t decide between the two of these. They’re different kinds of matches but they both were home runs in what they were going for. In wrestling, there is more than kind of great story and great match to end it. These two matches were prime examples of two very different kinds of stories and we’ll look at them a bit here. We’ll start with the battle of the legends in the cage.
To begin with, when I refer to the first HHH vs. Undertaker match, I mean the one that happened in 2011, not the one from eleven years ago.
This match might have the longest buildup for a match in the modern era. Think about it. This match was legitimately built up for over three years. The Shawn matches were more or less forerunners to this match, as was the match at last year’s Wrestlemania. It helped that all three of the previous matches ranged anywhere from good to excellent. Every part of the final match was great, starting with the buildup.
The stipulation for the match was set up on an episode of Raw after HHH and Undertaker had spent a few weeks glaring at each other and cutting overly dramatic promos. At the end of the day though, a stipulation was promised. My guess was that it was going to Streak vs. career again, but in something that hasn’t happened in years, HHH offered a Hell in a Cell match at a point in the year other than the HIAC PPV.
This showed what is lacking from the HIAC PPV. As opposed to the PPV, this match felt natural and a logical progression and ending to the feud between Undertaker and HHH. On top of that, having the match come out of nowhere rather than being the inevitable conclusion makes the match feel bigger. The match fit the feud rather than the feud being made to fit the match, which you can’t get at the PPV anymore.
Now let’s get to the actual match. With Shawn as the referee, the question became could the Streak actually end. The problem with Undertaker matches at Wrestlemania is making people believe the Streak is in jeopardy. The second Shawn match and the first HHH match couldn’t get over this issue: at no point did I ever feel that the Streak was in jeopardy. The matches were good, but they didn’t hit that higher level. On the other hand, the first Shawn match and the second HHH match had me freaking out over the near falls. That’s not something that often happens, but when it does, things get awesome.
The match itself was an all out war with a ton of drama the whole way through. Between HHH massacring Undertaker with a chair and Shawn nearly stopping it to the DX finisher of a superkick into a Pedigree only getting two to Undertaker not being able to finish HHH despite using finisher after finisher. After finally finishing him with a tombstone, we got perhaps the image of the year with the three legends embracing. I’m not sure what era this ended, but it was a great way to end that era.
Now let’s move on to the next month and the other match of the year. The night after Wrestlemania, Brock Lesnar returned and laid out John Cena with an F5. They brawled a few times over the next few weeks until we got to their Extreme Rules match, appropriately enough at Extreme Rules. The bell rang and the war was on.
This match was a war from the bell and was the most physical match I’ve seen in years. John Cena took one of the worst beatings I can ever remember but he stayed in the match somehow. This match was all about violence and it worked amazingly well. It was more of a fight than a match, which is something we haven’t seen in the company in years. These two beat each other up and the place was losing their minds over it.
On top of that, and I know this isn’t the most popular opinion, but this match was a testament to John Cena, as was the match the previous month’s battle with Rock. Cena has reached the point where no one on the regular roster can give him a legitimate challenge, so they had to bring in one of the biggest stars of all time and the former UFC World Heavyweight Champion. That says a lot about where Cena is on the all time greatness scale.
Overall, 2012 had some great matches, but the problem was getting between those matches. The TV shows are beyond watered down at this point as there’s too much TV going on. The good thing is that the PPV matches can be quite good, but the TV continues to get worse. Between the AJ saga and Aces and 8’s and Del Rio vs. Sheamus, these stories just go on too long. Still though, some matches were excellent and are well worth checking out again.
Impact
Date: December 20, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Todd Keneley, Mike Tenay, Taz
It’s Championship Thursday, meaning we’ve got three title matches in a single night. The Knockouts Title, the TV Title and the World Title are all on the line tonight, because this monthly show is on par with a $40 PPV they just had. Other than that we’re likely to get more of the Hogans arguing over Bully Ray because that’s the focus of Impact anymore. WWE turned it up this week so TNA needs to follow suit. Let’s get to it.
We open with the standard recap of last week’s show. The hosts talk about the show tonight also.
TV Title: Kurt Angle vs. D-Von
D-Von is defending and Angle has a bad ankle due to an attack last week/a legit groin injury. Angle brings out his own guys to counter Aces and 8’s in the form of Garrett, Wes and Joe. Angle gets behind D-Von to start but can’t snap off the suplex. Instead it’s a clothesline to take the champion down as Angle can’t move very well right now. D-Von is sent to the floor and the backup guys get in a big brawl while Angle waits on him to come back. All of the guys on the floor are ejected, but in the melee D-Von chop blocks Angle.
We take a break and come back with D-Von holding a basic leg lock on Angle but Kurt grabs the rope. D-Von cannonballs down on the leg ala Flair for two. That’s not old school enough for him though as it’s a Funk spinning toe hold now. Another chop block keeps Angle in trouble as Todd talks about the power struggle. What power? Aces and 8’s have the lowest title on the roster and that’s it.
Angle hits a middle rope missile dropkick to put both guys down, followed by some clotheslines. The overhead belly to belly gets two but D-Von escapes the Angle Slam and hits a really lame spinebuster for two. Angle starts rolling Germans and puts on the ankle lock, but here are Aces and 8’s again. Kurt’s three guys come out to counter them and in the distraction, the big masked man hits Angle in the back with a pipe so D-Von can retain the title at 11:08.
Rating: D+. Angle was hobbled here and that left D-Von to carry the match. That doesn’t make for an entertaining match as D-Von just isn’t good enough to hang with Kurt, even if he’s injured. On top of that, this still does nothing for Aces and 8’s. At the end of the day, it’s still D-Von. That doesn’t make anyone care at all.
Time for the Knockouts deliberation which is an excuse to have Brooke on TV more. ODB is thrown out because she has an injured husband.
Kenny King says he won last week and that’s all that matters. They’ll make good partners tonight though.
Joey Ryan/Matt Morgan vs. Rob Van Dam/Kenny King
Does Morgan plan to do anything with that robe or is it just there for now? Van Dam and Joey start things off with the champion (Van Dam) kicking Joey down. The standing moonsault gets two and it’s off to King. Morgan comes in and kicks King’s head off before it’s back to Ryan for his non-existent offense. Matt smacks King in the back of the head before it’s back to Ryan. King sunset flips him out of the corner and there’s the hot tag to RVD. King and Van Dam dropkick Morgan down and kick Ryan as well, but Kenny bails when confronted by Morgan. Matt kicks Rob’s head off to give Ryan the pin at 4:55.
Rating: C-. Not terrible here for the most part, but Ryan would be the outlier. He’s so useless and is only there for the occasional sight gag on a commercial. He’s another indy guy that has done nothing of note once he’s gotten to the main stage. I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that he owned the only company he did well in too.
We recap AJ’s speech last week.
Kazarian doesn’t care about AJ but likes that we’re five days from Christmas. He has a surprise for the fans.
Here’s Hulk for his weekly chat. He can’t believe how awesome this company is anymore and talks about how there’s going to be voting for the Impact Wrestler of the Year with Jeff Hardy being announced on January 3. Oh wait I mean the winner, which only could be Jeff Hardy. It’s not like he’s going to destroy everyone else in voting or anything. Anyway here’s Aces and 8’s to protest. D-Von says that this was Aces and 8’s year and says that next year will be as well. The bikers start to get in the ring but Bully Ray runs out for the save with his chain. D-Von says Ray is next. Hogan still won’t shake Ray’s hand.
Hardy is ready for Aries. Thankfully he says this instead of thinking it.
Tessmacher gets eliminated in another stupid Knockouts segment.
Here’s Kaz with some presents for Daniels. There’s a Christmas Tree in the ring with a picture of Daniels and Kaz on top. “That tree has TWO stars on it!” Daniels is brought out with an appletini and a scarf to sit on a throne. Kaz brings out Santa who is rather slim here. They give Santa some Zumbz pants in a funny bit. Santa asks Daniels if he’s been a good boy this year. Daniels says he got rid of the biggest loser in TNA and wants to use his Christmas wish on Styles’ kids, because their dad is so worthless.
Cue Storm who says he doesn’t like hearing these guys run down Christmas. Kaz says put him on the naughty list, which draws Daniels into the ring. Santa says hold it and Storm doesn’t think he’s the real Kris Kringle. If he’s the real Santa, why didn’t Storm get a real Red Ryder BB gun when he was six. Santa: “I’m the real Santa.” Storm: “Shut up.” Storm wants to know what he asked for last Christmas and Santa comes up with a Travis Tritt CD. Actually he wanted a case of beer, so here’s a superkick for Santa. Storm throws DVDs to the fans.
Aries asks if you could hear it. Apparently no one can hear his thoughts, but tonight he’ll prove he’s the best in the universe.
1-3-13 is Sting. Ok then.
Aces and 8’s gets yelled at by their boss for letting Bully Ray keep Hogan from getting his beating. D-Von says he has someone that can fix this and says they can be here next week. A vote says ok do it.
Mickie gets the shot.
Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Tara
Mickie grabs a bunch of quick rollups for two each but Jesse trips her up to give Tara control. A hair beal gets two and Tara pounds away a bit. She pulls on Mickie’s face and whips her into the corner with authority. Whose authority that is I’m not sure but she certainly had it. The spinning side slam is countered into a headscissors but the referee is with Jesse. A powerslam gets two for the champion but Mickie slams her down to get a breather.
They slug it out from their knees and Mickie hits a sloppy jumping DDT for two. Jesse and Tara try to leave, so Mickie dives on Jesse off the top. Jesse interferes AGAIN, allowing Tara to hit something like an atomic drop which bends Mickie’s knee back for the pin to retain at 7:00. Oh ok it was a facebuster.
Rating: D+. This started ok and then fell apart at the end. I had a hard time keeping up with what was going on in the ring, and in a match this simple that should never be the case. Nothing to see here as this match literally happened less than two weeks ago. Why would I want to see it again?
Joseph Park is still training in OVW and he’s still really bad at it. Joseph: “THAT HURT!” Danny Davis: “Do you know why that hurt? BECAUSE YOU’RE STUPID!” He sees blood coming out of his mouth though and turns into Abyss, killing his training partner with a Black Hole Slam.
TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries
Hardy is defending. Feeling out process to start with Jeff taking it into the corner. Aries slams him down but the slingshot hilo hits knees. Jeff pounds away in the corner and the challenger chills on the floor. Back in and Aries hits a running elbow to the face for two but Aries’ brainbuster is blocked. We head back to the floor where Hardy misses a dive into the barricade.
We take a break and come back with Aries getting two off a slingshot hilo. Aries pounds away for a bit more until Hardy gets a boot up. The champ dives into a boot though and we’re right back where we started. A front suplex puts Austin down but Aries comes back with a forearm and a running dropkick in the corner for two. The brainbuster is escaped again so Hardy hits a backwards facebuster out of a powerbomb for two. In other words imagine a powerbomb lift but Hardy keeps rotating Aries backwards so that his face slams into the mat.
Hardy hits the Twisting Stunner but can’t cover fast enough. Aries gets an elbow up in the corner and tells the referee he sucks. He jumps into an atomic drop but manages to kick Jeff into the referee. A low blow stops Hardy and Aries FINALLY hits the brainbuster. In a cool ending, Aries covers Hardy but Roode pulls the referee out. Bobby counts two and as Aries turns around, he gets a big spinebuster from Roode. The Twist of Fate sets up the Swanton to retain at 18:05.
Rating: B-. These two have chemistry together and it sets up the three way match even more, or at least Roode vs. Aries. It would seem like Roode is turning, but I think he’s going to be much more of a tweener than an actual face, which is the right move for him. Good match here and a nice ending to a bad show.
Hogan says he’s going to fix the title picture and says Aces and 8’s is the real distraction. He says not to worry about Brooke and Bully, but sees the two of them kissing to end the show.
Overall Rating: C-. This show didn’t really do much for me. These Championship Thursday shows are never anything of note because NOTHING EVER CHANGES. It’s just a title match but when you never see a title CHANGE, it doesn’t mean anything anymore. It’s pretty clear we’re headed for a three way at Genesis, which is ok but it doesn’t really do much for me. The idea of someone new in Aces and 8’s next week might help a bit, but it needs to be someone who is actually able to challenge the big names. As usual, nothing has changed as of ten PM on a Thursday night, which is getting old.
Results
D-Von b. Kurt Angle – Pin after a masked man hit Angle with a pipe
Joey Ryan/Matt Morgan b. Kenny King/Rob Van Dam – Carbon Footprint to Van Dam
Tara b. Mickie James – Facebuster
Jeff Hardy b. Austin Aries – Swanton Bomb
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews
NXT
Date:
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: William Regal, Tony Dawson
We’re into the new cycle of NXT now, but the problem continues to be the gap between the current WWE product and the current NXT product. It’s a bit off putting to have the Shield version of Rollins on Raw and this version of him on NXT. It looks like we’re moving towards Rollins vs. Graves in the main event scene around here. Oh and Big Show vs. Bo Dallas is tonight. Let’s get to it.
The opening video is all about Dallas vs. Big Show.
Welcome Home.
Primo/Epico vs. Usos
Jimmy starts with Primo and we quickly hit the mat. There’s an armdrag to put Primo down but Primo comes back with a hammerlock. Primo rolls away from an arm hold by Jimmy and we’ve got a standoff. Rosa gives Primo a quick kiss which earns him an elbow to the face. Back to the armbar and here’s Jey for the first time. Epico comes in as well and immediately puts on a chinlock which doesn’t last long either. This is a back and forth match so far but no one has any kind of long term advantage.
The Usos load up the Superfly Splash but Primo bails to the floor for a breather. Jey is all cool with that and hits a HUGE dive to take out the cousins. We take a break and come back with Epico holding a chinlock on Jey. Epico rolls some belly to back suplexes for two. Primo gets the same off a dropkick as the fans want Carlito. Jey avoids a dropkick in the corner and gets Primo caught in the Tree of Woe for a few seconds.
Hot tag brings in Jimmy but the referee didn’t see it. Nice touch. Jey counters a whip into the corner and hits a big backdrop to give himself a breather. There’s the real hot tag to Jimmy and a Bubba Bomb takes Primo down. The running Umaga attack in the corner sets up a Samoan Drop for two. Everything breaks down and a Jimmy superkick sets up the Superfly Splash to Epico for the pin at 8:28 shown of 11:58.
Rating: C+. They stuck with the formula here and it worked really well. The Usos are so talented and smooth together out there but they can barely ever get on TV. The few times recently where they were on television, they got the biggest reactions of the match. Interesting how that works. Anyway, good stuff here and a nice opener.
Post match the lights go out and it’s Ascension (complete with recently released Kenneth Cameron) on the screen, telling the Usos that the war is far from over.
Camacho/Aiden English vs. Big E. Langston
Camacho can pick anyone to fight Langston with him and he picks this jobber? English has to start and is immediately pounded down by knees in the ribs and a running clothesline. Langston drags English over to Camacho and extends English’s hand for a tag but Camacho bails. Big Ending ends English at 1:12.
Post match there’s another Big Ending and the FIVE, then does both of them again. The reactions for the FIVE thing are tremendous.
Percy Watson vs. Kassius Ohno
Watson speeds things up to start and pounds on Ohno’s back to start. Ohno comes back with a suplex and a corner splash followed by some high energy stomps/knees to the head. Off to a dragon sleeper by Kassius followed by some choking on the top rope. They chop it out a bit but Ohno charges into an elbow to the face. Percy makes his comeback but the Persecution is blocked. Ohno Blade (or whatever he’s calling that elbow now) knocks Watson out cold at 5:23.
Rating: D. I am so bored with Ohno. The guy is talented but he’s got NOTHING going for him at all. He’s a bad guy who likes to strike people, but his attitude is all wrong for it. There’s nothing to dislike about him and that makes him a weak heel. He’s just kind of there and has his time every week. Watson continues to be nothing.
Ohno shouts at Regal post match.
Here’s Seth Rollins for a chat with JR. Seth says he’s here for anyone that wants to fight him and he’s not hard to find. Corey Graves jumps Rollins from behind and puts him in the 13th Step leg lock. Graves talks about how his tattoos all tell a story and now he wants the Title. He says Rollins feeds off the fans and he’ll see Seth in his nightmares. Not bad here but calling himself the Savior of Misbehavior isn’t going to get him over.
Cena tells us to watch the NXT Year In Review show next week.
Bo Dallas vs. Big Show
Non-title I’d assume. This is about what you would expect to start: Dallas goes nuts with strikes and is easily shoved away. The beating goes on for awhile until Dallas gets on his back and chokes away. Show falls back on him to break the hold but misses an elbow. Dallas escapes the chokeslam but a bulldog is countered with a basic slam. WMD ends this at 4:53.
Rating: D. What in the world were you expecting here? It’s a tiny minor league guy against a massive world champion. I have no idea why they picked Show here because it doesn’t do Dallas any good and the match sucked as a result. I don’t get this one at all, as there are a ton of guys you could bring in to beat Dallas but get a better match out of him at the same time. Odd choice here.
Overall Rating: C. This didn’t work all that well for me. It wasn’t a bad show or anything, but this didn’t really advance anything. The only storyline stuff we got was Ascension vs. Usos which we’ve done before and Ohno staring at Regal. Oh and Graves vs. Rollins, but we already knew that was coming. Not much to see here but it wasn’t terrible or anything.
Results
Usos b. Epico/Primo – Superfly Splash to Epico
Big E. Langston b. Camacho/Aiden English – Big Ending to English
Kassius Ohno b. Percy Watson – Ohno Blade
Big Show b. Bo Dallas – WMD
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews
Wrestling Champions From Chicago
Date: April 5, 1963
Location: Chicago Coliseum, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 3,140
Commentator: Bob Elson
This is about ten days after my father turned ten years old. After holding the record for about two weeks, the Washington DC shows I did have lost their spot as the oldest show I’ve ever reviewed. This is presumably a TV show from the local promotion, which means I have no idea what to expect here. Bobo Brazil is in the main event and that’s all I’ve got. Let’s get to it.
The music sounds like something out of a circus which is fitting for a wrestling show.
Apparently this is the International Wrestling Alliance which I’ve never heard of.
Brute Bernard/Skull Murphy vs. Bavarian Boys
The Boys are Rudi Jacobs and Harry Wenzel. This is 2/3 falls and I have no idea who is who here. Brute and Harry start things off. Brute and Skull look almost identical so I’m in trouble with telling who is who. They double team Wenzel and a double kick to the chest gets two. After some more cheating it’s off to Murphy who is quickly taken to the mat. Jacobs comes in and works on the leg which fires up the crowd. The Boys are tiny by comparison so this is likely power vs. speed.
Jacobs gets Bernard tied up in the ropes and hits a cross body before bringing in Harry for some kicks to the face. Back to Jacobs for some dropkicks to a still tied up Bernard. They’re picking the pace up very quickly. Harry comes in again and they head to the mat for a chinlock/bite from Bernard. The heels (Bernard’s team) double teams Wenzel in the corner and we’re told that they only have until four to break rather than five. That’s interesting.
We get a modern classic as the hot tag is made but the referee doesn’t see it. Some things never change I guess. A double slam on Harry is enough for the first fall for Murphy and Bernard. To start the second fall, things break down for a bit until it’s down to Wenzel vs. Murphy. Harry takes him to the mat and tries a surfboard (called that here) but Bernard makes the save. Rudi comes in with a MISSILE DROPKICK (that was a HUGE spot back then) for only two.
Jacobs gets caught in the corner in the same sequence we had earlier on. Murphy gets thrown across the ring in a surprising power display by the much smaller Bavarians. Back to Bernard as everything breaks down again. Some near falls are broken up until it’s Murphy hiding in the corner from Wenzel. Harry scrapes Murphy’s eye with his boot and cranks away on the arm for a bit.
Back to Jacobs for a lot of whipping into the corner before putting on a leg lock that I can’t see the details of. Murphy blocks a snap mare attempt from Wenzel before Harry goes back to the arm. The idea of selling hadn’t quite been perfected at this point. Johnson comes back in for a bunch of dropkicks and gets a very fast submission off an abdominal stretch. Yep, very different time here.
The third fall begins with Murphy claiming a back injury and not wanting to face Wenzel anymore. The ever nice referee makes him come in anyway and things slow down a bit. We keep stalling for a few more minutes so it’s off to Jacobs instead. The big guys take over with some cheap double teaming until it’s down to Murphy vs. Wenzel again. Bernard comes in and finally gets in some offense with knees to the chest and a lot of stomping. This doesn’t last long as it’s quickly back to Jacobs but it was fun while it lasted.
Rudi pounds away in the corner and sends Brute flying before it’s off to Murphy again. Skull hides in the corner and brings Skull back in immediately. These are really fast paced tags. Murphy and Brute tag about three more times in fifteen seconds before we get down to Brute vs. Jacobs again. The abdominal stretch goes on (called the Cobra Twist here) Bernard again but Skull comes in with a headbutt, giving Bernard the winning pin on Jacobs to end the match.
Rating: B-. I don’t know if it’s the expectations for this to be slow because it’s old or what, but this match was REALLY fun. They played up the power vs. speed formula before the formula had been invented and it came off like a really entertaining match. I’m really surprised by that and it’s worth seeing more from these guys. Good stuff.
The Bavarian Boys complain about getting cheated. They have a right to and talks of a rematch are heard. Some German is also heard.
IWA World Title: Bobo Brazil vs. Moose Cholak
This is 2/3 falls as well and I think Bobo is challenging. Moose is a BIG guy, weighing well over 300lbs. His nickname is Golden and he wears headgear ala Rick Steiner. Moose wins a slugout to start and sends Bobo to the mat. Bobo isn’t a small guy at all either so this is going to be a brawl I’d assume. They slug it out again and Bobo takes him down this time before putting on a quick chinlock.
Moose punches him into the corner but Bobo comes back with chops. He goes after Moose’s headgear but can’t quite get it off. Moose headbutts Bobo (Bobo’s finisher) and they slug it out again. Bobo staggers him with a headbutt of his own so they head to the mat. Moose kicks away at the leg and cannonballs down on it like Flair. Bobo shrugs that off and works on the arm a bit. Moose is whipped into the corner and literally the ring moves. Out of nowhere Cholak hits a knee to the chest and a splash for the first fall.
Bobo chokes him into the corner to start the second fall and goes after the gear again. We hit the chinlock again before Moose bails to the apron. Moose misses a charge in the corner and Bobo backdrops him down to tie us up at a fall apiece. Moose takes him to the mat by the arm to start the third fall. There’s a half nelson by the champ into a bodyscissors as we kill some time. After a few two counts in the bodyscissors by Moose, Bobo escapes and puts on a chinlock of his own.
The champ makes it to a rope as we’re told that the curfew is almost up. They go to a test of strength and I think you know what’s going to happen here. Bobo is in trouble but headbutts his way out of trouble. Instead of power, Brazil tries to take it to the mat but winds up in the ropes instead. Cholak goes after the leg again in a hold that looks like a cover.
Bobo hooks a headscissors but Moose hooks one of his own at the same time. Basically they look like they’re…..never mind. Moose headbutts away a bit more to take over but it seems to tick Bobo off. He chops away in the corner and hits the Coco Butt which is acting way more like a signature move than a finisher. They slug it out until the curfew and the draw.
Rating: C. This would have been WAY better if they cut out about five minutes of the time killing. Bobo was always a crowd favorite because he had a ton of charisma. I’m not familiar with Cholak but he did pretty well out there. He makes for a solid heel champion, even though I can’t find much information on this particular title.
Moose insists on being announced as champion. He wants a rematch with more time, despite saying Bobo is a poor sport.
Overall Rating: B-. I enjoyed this a lot more than I expected to. They had some very solid matches on here and promos to set up rematches when one ended with cheating and another in a draw. I’d love to see some more from this territory as the show was really entertaining. Good stuff here and worth checking out.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews
Tribute to the Troops 2012
Date: December 19, 2012
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole
This is the tenth anniversary of the biggest publicity stunt WWE does every year. The wrestling tonight is going to be light and the ratings are going to be a lot more lax with this show. The main idea here is to have the troops feel good and there’s really nothing else to it other than that. Let’s get to it.
The standard video from the President and opening video of “it means more to us” start things off.
Sheamus/Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big Show
The governor of Virginia is here. They’re playing this up as live or at least recent, as they mention Orton’s separated shoulder from the Smackdown that aired 12 days ago. Actually the injury seemed to occur in this match so who knows what’s going on. Orton and Ziggler start things off with Barrett pounding away. The commentary is talking about the stuff that happened in the last two nights, so either it was recorded later or they had some BIG spoilers given to Cole and JBL. Show and Ziggler are knocked to the floor and walk away for the countout at 2:20. Well that was pointless.
Oh never mind here’s Booker to say continue the match after a break. Back with Orton pounding on Dolph. Sheamus comes in and gets dropkicked down, but Show drops to the floor to tie his boot rather than face Sheamus. There are the ten forearms to Dolph’s chest and it’s back to Randy to pound away in the corner. He charges into a boot though and Ziggler takes over. A dropkick gets two for Ziggler and it’s off to Show for some pounding. Cole talks about cannonballs and muskets for some reason. Show misses a chop in the corner but Orton’s arm goes out. There’s the injury.
The referee immediately starts checking on him and we cut to the crowd, presumably to not see the X sign. A tag brings in Sheamus as Orton is looked at on the floor. You can see Cole with his head on his hand so I’m guessing he and JBL are just sitting there, meaning the commentary was done later. Sheamus cleans house but goes up top and jumps into a chokeslam. That’s reversed into White Noise for two as Ziggler makes the save, so Orton gives him a very weak looking RKO. Show gets one as well and it’s a Brogue Kick for the pin at 12:54 all together, counting the time Booker took to restart the match.
Rating: C-. I know these shows are for the live fans, but for the seventeen people that watch Smackdown every week, these pairings are so old it’s not even funny anymore. This is where mixing the main event and midcard would work wonders. Do that on Smackdown a bit and then matches like these aren’t as bad. The match wasn’t bad but the injury slowed things down a lot and you can’t hold that against them.
Fergie says hi.
The US Gymnastics Team (there are four here and the team is the Fierce Five) read off a teleprompter about how much they love the troops. Maybe the fifth was fixing the screen.
Gonzo talks to Pepe and Rizzo but the latter two are busy staring at Layla. Eh the Muppets can make anything better.
Flo Rida performs. I see what else is on.
Cena says everything you would expect him to say.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Ryback
Del Rio says we’re here for the troops, but today is also Ricardo’s birthday. He asks for a chorus of Happy Birthday, but Del Rio sings in Spanish because he’s a heel here….I think? Del Rio is slammed down to start but a Ricardo distraction lets Alberto get in some kicks to the leg. A powerslam puts Del Rio down but Ricardo jumps on Ryback’s back for the DQ at 1:30.
Ricardo takes a Shell Shock, as does Del Rio a few seconds later.
Kid Rock performs.
Josh tries to interview Kermit before he’s on MizTV. Statler and Waldorf have some insults of course.
Some soldiers TOUT IT OUT!
Time for MizTV with the Muppets. Miz doesn’t want to talk about Kermit’s new single, but rather he wants to expose him. Miz wants to know the REAL story about what’s going on with Kermit and Piggy. To be fair, that’s a REALLY good question. Kermit: “For me, it’s still don’t ask don’t tell.” Ok point for a funny line. Kermit says he thought Miz was a good guy, but Miz insists he’s just awesome instead of a good guy.
The second guess is Miss Piggy. Miz wants to know what the deal is with these two, so Kermit says they’re just a frog and a pig who care about each other. This turns into a REALLY battle, so Miz says let’s have them get married RIGHT HERE. Damien Sandow interrupts. Kermit: “HALLELUJAH!” Piggy: “WHAT?” Kermit: “Uh I mean….How dare he???”
Sandow makes fun of Miz and says that 78% of the fans have taken the pictures of the Muppets out of their wallets and replaced them with pictures of Sandow. He says that Miz and Piggy are both overrated hams, causing Piggy to go into karate mode. Miz decks Sandow for her.
Damien Sandow vs. The Miz
This is joined in progress after the break with the Muppets watching from the stage. Miz pounds away in the corner and we head to the outside. All Miz so far as he high fives some fans. Back in and Damien pounds away before we hit the chinlock. Kermit of course is having his nightly crisis on the stage until Miz comes back with a flapjack. The Reality Check is broken up and Sandow hits a kind of running Blockbuster for two, but Miz counters the pin into a rollup for the pin at 3:30.
Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but Kermit freaking out is always funny. I’m a die hard Muppets fan and they’ve been by far and away the highlight of the show so far. Just fun all around here, albeit with a boring match for the most part. At the end of the day though, if you want Miz to get over, having him defend the Muppets isn’t the worst idea in the world.
Piggy kisses Miz post match and he likes it.
The Miami Heat love the troops.
Katie Couric loves the troops.
Flo-Rida performs Wild Ones.
We look back at Tribute to the Troops over the years.
HELL NO is in the back and they need a third man to face 3MB. Bryan has picked Little Jimmy, and Kane likes the idea. Truth comes up and says that Little Jimmy’s cousin Ugly Frida is getting married and Little Jimmy has to be there, so it’s Truth teaming up with them tonight. After the match is over, they can go to the club or karaoke or kill some spiders.
Kane blames Bryan for this. Bryan: “IT’S NOT MY FAULT! NO! NO! NO!” A voice from off screen says yes, and it’s Animal from the Muppets. They shout at each other until Animal calls him Goatface. Bryan turns around and runs into…..a talking goat. “Cousin Daniel?” Too funny.
HELL NO/R-Truth vs. 3MB
We cut to a shot of the crowd during HELL NO’s entrance, apparently because Kane tripped and nearly fell off the stage during his entrance. McIntyre and Truth start things off with nothing going on. Bryan comes in and fires off some kicks in the corner, but HE HAS TIL FIVE. Mahal puts on a chinlock for no significant length of time before it’s off to Kane. He cleans house and pounds on Slater, hitting the side slam and top rope clothesline. Everything breaks down and Jinder and Heath break up a double chokeslam. Truth makes a blind tag and there’s the chokeslam to Mahal. Little Jimmy pins Slater at 3:27.
Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but it wasn’t supposed to be anything major. HELL NO needs some opponents in a hurry, as the division is already falling back into obscurity like it always has been. 3MB needs more character development as they can only be clueless schmucks for so long.
Kid Rock performs Born Free.
Cesaro makes fun of the USA and says Switzerland is better. He gets Cena tonight.
Sam the Eagle salutes Cena.
Some guy from Twilight and Sharon Stone love the troops.
John Cena vs. Antonio Cesaro
Cesaro doesn’t even get an entrance. That should tell you where we’re going here. The Muppets introduce Cena, which is completely awesome. Cena pounds him down to start but Cesaro throws him into the corner to take over. They head to the floor with Cena being rammed into the steps. Back in and the gutwrench suplex gets two and here’s the comeback. Cena shrugs off everything Cesaro did, hits the Five Moves of Doom and wins with the AA at 5:23.
Rating: C. If you don’t get why this match happened the way it does, go watch a test pattern. That’s more on your intelligence level.
The locker room empties out and Cena gives a speech about how awesome AMERICA is to end the show. Oh wait there’s one more thing: some more wrestlers come out dressed as reindeer pulling Santa in a sleigh. I don’t recognize Santa this yeah but the idea is there. Cena throws gifts to the fans and the wrestler walks around high fiving people to really end the show. A closeup of Santa shows that it might (emphasis on that word) have been Johnny Ace.
Overall Rating: C-. This didn’t work for me. I get that it’s supposed to be a special, but that’s where it falls short: nothing about this felt special. It felt like a dull Smackdown with a few musical performances thrown in to fill in some time. The being in America part is understandable, but it really takes away a lot of the fun from these shows. It’s not bad, but after this many hours of WWE in the previous three days, it was REALLY hard to get into this show. Not terrible, but this should have been the Christmas Eve Raw. No one is going to watch that anyway, so why waste major stories on it? The Muppets were awesome though.
Results
Randy Orton/Sheamus b. Dolph Ziggler/Big Show – Brogue Kick to Big Show
Ryback b. Alberto Del Rio via DQ when Ricardo Rodriguez interfered
The Miz b. Damien Sandow – Rollup
HELL NO/R-Truth b. 3MB – Little Jimmy to Slater
John Cena b. Antonio Cesaro – Attitude Adjustment
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews
Today
KB
Smackdown
Date: December 18, 2012
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Josh Matthews, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole
This is a special show so that they can start taping the holiday episodes sooner. This is live as well as commercial free for no apparent reason. After last night’s Slammys, we’ve got a lot of places we can go now, so hopefully the show tonight is as good as Raw was last night. It’s hard to say what to expect from these shows though as they can be hit or miss. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap from last night as you would expect a show to do anymore.
The main event is Cena/Sheamus vs. Big Show/Ziggler as you would expect.
We open with MizTV which has to be the most frequent talk show segment in years. The guests tonight are Ziggler and AJ who haven’t been confirmed as a thing yet. Langston is with them as well. Ok considering AJ and Ziggler kissed on the stage, maybe they are a thing. Miz asks why all of this stuff has happened and AJ says ask Cena why he played with her heart. She lost her job as GM to keep Cena’s good name clean and we get a clip of Cena kissing AJ.
AJ goes on a rant about having her heart broken by Cena. We get a clip from thre weeks ago with Cena and Vickie talking about the bows Vickie found in the locker room. Cena made fun of them, AND THAT IS A PLOT POINT. Yes, an eight second line about FREAKING BOWS is the reason this story is happening. Then Cena told AJ to stop coming to the ring with him, like she was some dirty little secret. Cena is supposed to be better than that, but he broke her heart. Therefore, she broke Cena’s chances at TLC.
Miz asks who Langston is so AJ says he’s Big E. Langston. Ok then. Miz doesn’t really care about what’s going on because AJ is crazy. Apparently that work ticks her off, but she’s proven to Dolph that she’s not crazy. He doesn’t care that Cena won Superstar of the Year, because he stole the show and Cena’s girl. Miz makes fun of AJ for being a sl** and says Ziggler is the sixth member of One Direction. Langston lays out Miz.
Teddy comes up to talk to Booker T with a prospect for a job later. It’s Brad Maddox and Booker goes off on Teddy. Long says that Brad is a good prospect because he has a big social media following. Booker gives him the chance because Teddy says Booker knows what a second chance means. What is with the references to him being an ex-con lately? Maddox gets the match and finds out his opponent later.
Damien Sandow vs. Sin Cara
Rey’s music hits for some reason but there’s no Rey. Cara speeds things up to start and Damien bails to the floor. Back in and Cara walks the corner for the armdrag, followed up by a springboard missile dropkick. Cody breaks up a springboard something and Cara is down on the floor. That gets two for Sandow back inside, as does a suplex. A quick chinlock goes nowhere so there’s the Russian legsweep.
The Wind-Up Elbow misses, but Sin can’t get anything going. Back to the chinlock for a bit until Cara escapes and hits a quick cross body. Cara dives on the Scholars on the floor….and here comes the Shield. They have Mysterio’s mask and throw it at Cara, allowing Sandow to hit the Terminus for the pin, appropriately enough at 6:19.
Rating: D+. Dull match here which didn’t go anywhere. Shield attacking various people is still a good idea, because at least they’ve proven they can back it up. Not a terrible match here, but once Mysterio didn’t show up it was clear that something was up and Shield is the right idea. We still need some reasoning behind these attacks, but it’s not bad yet.
Post match, Shield destroys Cara and hurts his knee, which is likely a way to get Cara off TV for a legit knee problem he’s been having.
Flo-Rida and Miss Piggy waste some time so we can get Cara out of the ring.
Santino Marella vs. Tensai
This is fallout from the presentation of an award last night. Santino grabs a headlock to start but Tensai runs him over. Santino does his power walk thing but stupidly tries to slam the big bald guy. Instead he escapes a powerslam and tries a German suplex. That goes nowhere and a slam completely fails. Off to a weak looking chinlock by the monster before a cross body is no sold. Santino does his signature stuff and finally slams Albert. The Cobra is blocked and Santino is put in a sleeper. The Cobra hits the top of Tensai’s head to no effect. The backsplash misses Santino and he steals a pin that was clearly going to him the whole time at 4:18.
Rating: D-. Tensai, go away. Get off of my television, go back to Japan, go to Belarus, go wherever will take you, but get away from me. You’re a joke, not interesting, not anything to see, and just annoying overall. Just go away already so no one can miss you. Why he was hired back I have no idea.
Cara has a severely injured knee.
We recap the Cena/Flair/Punk/Heyman/HELL NO/Shield/Ryback segment from last night.
Kofi and HELL NO are in the back with Kane telling Kofi to watch over his shoulder for the Shield tonight. Bryan looks ticked off and apparently he’s mad for not winning a Slammy last night. Kofi pulls his Slammy out. “You mean like this one?” They try to console Bryan by reminding him that he got to hang out with Flair, but make the mistake of saying Flair has the best catchphrase ever. Bryan: “NO! NO! NO!” Funny stuff.
Kofi Kingston/HELL NO vs. Prime Time Players/Wade Barrett
Mysterio apparently has a neck injury from the attack by Shield. Kofi and Titus start but Kingston goes right for Wade, allowing the heels to take over. Young gets dropkicked down and here’s Bryan to kick him a lot. There’s the surfboard hold by Bryan and it’s off to Kane for a low dropkick to Young’s chest. Back to Daniel for a dropkick of his own as I think this match is going to last awhile.
Bryan fires off the kicks to Young in the corner but gets caught in a Stun Gun to change the momentum. Barrett comes in to pound away for a bit, but Bryan dives away for a tag to Kofi. The IC Champion goes off on Wade but Young breaks up Trouble in Paradise, allowing Barrett to clothesline Kofi to the floor. The Players work over Kingston as we look at the crowd to see if Shield is coming. Apparently Mysterio’s neck injury is a SEVERE neck injury and not just a regular one. Good to know.
Barrett pounds away on Kofi a bit for two before it’s back to Young. Kofi finally comes back with a tornado DDT out of the corner, allowing for a double hot tag to Kane and Titus. The masked man takes over and hits a side slam for two. The top rope clothesline misses and there’s the Clash of the Titus to Kane, but Bryan makes the save. Everything breaks down and Darren gets the tag. Bryan pulls Titus to the floor and the chokeslam pins Young at 10:45.
Rating: C-. Not bad here but where are we supposed to go with either of these feuds? HELL NO has beaten the Players time after time, while Kofi has beaten Barrett in their PPV title match. Then again, these feuds are likely going to keep going because that makes it easier on the writers, and Heaven forbid they have to figure out something new.
It’s the top of the hour so let’s hit that recap button.
Sheamus explains some UK comedy show to Cena but he doesn’t get it. He says Langston is the strongest person he’s ever faced, which seems to turn Sheamus on. Sheamus asks what’s up with AJ. “You can tell me, no one is around.” Cena whispers in Sheamus’ ear and Sheamus starts to laugh but is disturbed by something Cena says. John says more though and Sheamus isn’t sure what to think. He looks scared but Cena was kidding him. Sheamus: “But is that even possible?”
Here are Punk and Heyman with something to say. Punk says the fans are going to look back in the years and be shocked that they didn’t vote Punk Superstar of the Year. He talks about how the fans clearly don’t care about winning and losing, meaning they’re the kinds of parents who put their kinds in t-ball where they don’t keep score so the kids don’t know how big of a failure they are. Punk rips on Cena for being a mockery of the words on his shirt: Hustle, Loyalty and Respect.
This turns into an anti-Flair promo because Punk says he never loses. He’s been champion for nearly 400 days and he’s still here two weeks after having knee surgery. He’s not on strike like the Pittsburgh Penguins because he doesn’t have an off season. No one can beat him, and here’s Ryback. You know, that guy that loses every match he’s in anymore. Ryback actually talks, and says that on the first Raw of the year, he’s getting his title shot against Punk.
Antonio Cesaro vs. Ryback
Ryback throws Cesaro to the floor to start and pounds his head into the mat back inside. The Goldberg chant start and Ryback hits the Thesz Press and a splash. All Ryback so far. Cesaro bails to the floor before the Meat Hook can hit and gets his belt to leave. Ryback heads to the floor and tries to throw Antonio back in, but Cesaro escapes and sends Ryback into the steps for a nine count.
Back in and Antonio hooks a cobra sleeper for a few moments. Ryback misses a charge in the corner, sending his shoulder into the post. A middle rope European Uppercut gets two for Cesaro and it’s off to a cravate. Ryback fights up and pounds Cesaro down before hitting the Meat Hook. Shell Shock gets the clean pin at 5:11.
Rating: C. Erg. If you need to put Ryback over someone to keep him strong, PICK SOMEONE OTHER THAN THE FREAKING UNITED STATES CHAMPION. This was just a step above a squash as the steps and post did way more damage to Ryback than Cesaro did. The match was nothing good either, but the fans were WAY into it.
We see Miz going through Navy training. He also flies a plane. Riveting stuff.
AJ comes up to Kaitlyn in the back and Kaitlyn doesn’t want to talk to her. Kaitlyn tells AJ she’s tired of this and a brawl breaks out.
Divas Title: Eve Torres vs. Kaitlyn
We get a freaking recap of the brawl that just happened ON A SHOW WITH NO COMMERCIALS. REALLY? We REALLY NEEDED THAT??? Kaitlyn gets thrown down to start and Eve hits her running flip splash for two. We head to the floor with Eve still in control. Nothing happens there so here’s a Downward Spiral for two by Eve.
Off to a chinlock by the champion (Eve if that wasn’t clear) until Kaitlyn gets two off a small package. A sloppy middle rope sunset flip gets two for Kaitlyn as does the reverse DDT. Kaitlyn dives onto Eve off the apron to the flor as this just keeps going. Kaitlyn goes up but Eve grabs the referee’s foot….AND THAT’S A DQ at about 5:20.
Rating: D. OH GOOD FREAKING GRIEF. If there was EVER a time to change this stupid belt, it was right here. Kaitlyn isn’t anywhere near good in the ring and now we have to sit through a long match until we get to THAT stupid ending? Give me a freaking break. Terrible match with a bad ending on top of that.
Ziggler says he’s a future world champion when Show comes up. He threatens Ziggler and Langston looks to stare Show down, only to have AJ stop him. Show threatens to kill Dolph if he tries to cash in tonight.
We recap the Sheamus/Show stuff from last night which included the attempted cash in by Ziggler, only to see Cena spoil it. Jerk.
Brad Maddox vs. Brodus Clay
Brodus pounds away with headbutts to start and drops some elbows. Maddox comes back with a quick dropkick to the side of the head for one and we hit the chinlock. Brodus comes back with a splash in the corner and suplex to set up the splash for the pin at 2:08. Same Maddox match as always.
Post match it’s the Shield to beat down Brodus. They actually hit the SuperBomb.
Dolph Ziggler/Big Show vs. John Cena/Sheamus
Apparently Santa Claus is hosting Raw on Monday. Shouldn’t he be working? Cena and Ziggler start things off with Dolph ducking under a Cena punch and strutting a bit. Off to Show so Cena can fire away punches with little effect. Show misses the chop and gets dropkicked into the corner. Show pounds him right back down again and it’s off to Ziggler for some elbow drops.
Cena backdrops Ziggler down but can’t make the tag before Show comes back in. He stays in for about two seconds so it’s back to Ziggler. Dolph misses a splash in the corner and there’s the tag to Sheamus. He hits the ten forearms on the apron but has to stop to punch Show before he can hit White Noise. The Cloverleaf is broken up with Sheamus being kicked to the floor. Show takes Sheamus’ head off and the match slows down again.
Sheamus gets pounded on now as we hit the second heat segment of the match. Show gets in his usual power stuff, followed by Ziggler pounding away for awhile with his usual stuff. Back to Show whose chokeslam is countered into a DDT to put both guys down. The double tag brings in Cena to face Ziggler and everything breaks down. Sheamus and Show head to the floor and then up the ramp as Ziggler gets two off the Zig Zag. There’s the AA to Dolph but Langston comes in for the DQ at 11:30.
Rating: C-. Why, it’s almost like this was EXACTLY THE SAME THING THEY DID LAST NIGHT. Good grief are the writers that creatively bankrupt? I mean, it’s the NEXT DAY and you can’t come up with another idea? This match did very little to make me feel better about this show, which has been the same story that this match had: no reason for it to exist.
The heels pose to end the show. Seriously, that’s it. Oh wait we do get a commercial for Tribute to the Troops because EIGHT HOURS OF TV THIS WEEK ISN’T ENOUGH.
Overall Rating: D. What in the world was the point in this being a special? The lack of commercials makes an already tiring show even more exhausting as you don’t get a breather if you want to see the whole thing. The main event was your standard main event tag match and it’s nothing to see at all. There’s nothing of note here and while it’s not a horrible show, it falls into the same category Smackdown stays in anymore: completely unnecessary viewing.
Results
Damien Sandow b. Sin Cara – Terminus
Santino Marella b. Tensai – Pin after Tensai missed a backsplash
HELL NO/Kofi Kingston b. Prime Time Players/Wade Barrett – Chokeslam to Young
Ryback b. Antonio Cesaro – Shell Shock
Kaitlyn b. Eve Torres via DQ when Eve grabbed the referee
Brodus Clay b. Brad Maddox – Splash
John Cena/Sheamus b. Dolph Ziggler/Big Show via DQ when Big E. Langston interfered
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews
Monday
Date: February 13, 1999
Location: SkyDome, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 41,432
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole
This is yet another go home/special show which feels like all I do in 1999. Due to something airing on USA on Monday, Raw was pushed back to Saturday, which is the day before the PPV. The main event tonight is a gauntlet of some kind with Austin having to face the entire Corporation for some kind of prize. I’ve also done the Raw after this and the link is at the end. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of the Rumble where Austin was ambushed by the Corporation.
Here’s Austin to open the show to a HUGE pop. He can’t wait until tomorrow night to get his hands on McMahon, who better have his track shoes on so he can run for as long as he can. After that, he’s going to walk over Vince’s body and head straight to Wrestlemania. Austin guarantees bloodshed, and it’s not going to be his. Cole: “That means it’s going to be the boss’!” Seriously, he was the BEST they could do? REALLY?
Cue Mankind who likes the sound of the word bloodshed. He says that he might have to go get some of Vince’s blood on his new white shirt tomorrow night. That’s a bit morbid wouldn’t you say? Anyway Mankind says that he’s ready for Wrestlemania, but tonight one of the two of them is going to take a beating. He reminds Austin that he’s the WWF Champion until he isn’t anymore. See, when Foley says things like that he can get away with it. When Cole says it, he sounds like an idiot.
Here’s the Corporation with Rock saying that he needs to clear a few things up. He gives Mankind directions to the Smackdown Hotel, but says instead of checking Mankind in, he’s going to bash Mankind’s brains in. Rock calls himself the chosen one which isn’t a name that ever stuck. As for Austin, Vince says that Steve has no chance, just like he had at the Rumble. He loved hearing himself announced as the winner of the Rumble, and he’d like to hear it again on Sunday.
Vince guarantees that none of the Corporation will interfere in the match. If they do, he’ll fire all of them and they’ll all be out of jobs. After Sunday, nothing will be the same for Austin. Also tonight, Austin will be facing Mankind in a non-title match with Vince as guest referee. Vince’s face was AWESOME here as he looked downright maniacal.
Mark Henry stares at Debra.
D’Lo Brown vs. Jeff Jarrett
Before the match, Brown has a surprise for Henry. To make sure Henry stays focused, here’s someone nice he can look at. Brown introduces the debuting Ivory, basically as Henry’s love slave. Jarrett jumps Brown to start and hits a DDT onto the arm. Brown comes back with a spinwheel kick as Henry hits on Ivory. Jeff puts on the Figure Four but Ivory’s distraction lets Brown escape and hit the Sky High. Nothing here.
Post match we get a catfight.
Earlier today, Val Venis and Ryan Shamrock were spotted at a hotel.
We recap Val and the Shamrocks, which has ticked Ken off to no end.
Here are Val and the very good looking Ryan. Kevin Kelly asks them about about why they’re doing this and sex lines ensue. Ken runs out and beats up Val. He beats up some referees too because he’s insane.
Val says he’s going to take care of Ken tonight.
Goldust vs. Gillberg
Goldust gets some blue roses before the match. Gillberg tries the spear and is shoved away with ease. Goldie stomps away and hits a clothesline followed by the Curtain Call. Here’s Blue Dust who is shown on the screen with just some grapes covering him up. Gillberg rolls up Goldust for the pin.
Gillberg gets Shattered Dreams as a reward, followed by Goldust getting a Blue Bath, meaning he’s covered in blue paint.
Earl Hebner says that none of his referees will officiate Shamrock’s match Sunday. If a replacement can’t be found, Shamrock has to forfeit the title. Couldn’t that be used by corrupt referees to cost someone a title?
Here’s DX with something to say. Apparently on Sunday it’s HHH/Pac vs. Chyna/Kane. HHH tells Chyna that she can’t even draw a walk in the game because she doesn’t have any balls. Pac wants Kane as well and says bring it. Road Dogg says there’s not going to be a third fall in the 2/3 falls match with Snow. He moonwalks here a bit for no apparent reason.
Gunn takes off his shirt off and reveals his referee shirt. Dogg: “You want a job at Foot Locker?” Billy is going to referee the IC Title match and that’s it. Nothing more to this segment than that: everyone talking about their matches and setting them up a bit better. Why don’t we get this more often today? Oh that’s right: we need 958 recaps and to have the GM talk for an hour a night anymore.
Steve Austin vs. Mankind
Vince is guest referee and this is non-title. He has the two guys come to the middle and says that anything goes here. The use of assorted furniture is acceptable and kicks to the groin would be appreciated. Austin says someone is taking a beating, but it’s not himself or Mankind. Vince stares Austin down and turns around into Mr. Socko and the Claw. The Corporation runs out for the save but are easily beaten down. No match of course.
Post break, Vince puts Austin in the Corporation Gauntlet, minus Rock.
Godfather vs. Viscera
Mideon sits in on commentary and has an eyeball in a jar. Godfather pounds away on the fat man and gets a boot up in the corner to block a charge. Godfather gets Viscera down with a suplex but Mideon runs in for the fast DQ.
Val and Ken are fighting in the back and Billy Gunn is dragged into it.
X-Pac vs. Kane
Let it continue. Pac fires off kicks to start but a spinwheel kick is caught in a spinebuster for two. Kane throws him around even more before sending Pac to the floor. The big man tries to crush Pac with the steps but hits the post instead. A dropkick sends Kane off the apron and we head back inside. Chyna comes in for the lame DQ.
HHH saves Pac from a Chyna Pedigree.
Road Dogg is out cold in the back and bleeding from behind the ear. Medics look at him but he says to find Billy, who didn’t do this to him.
Here’s Al Snow with something to say. He says that he’s going to take his Hardcore Title back and claims that Roadie stabbed him and Head in the back. Snow wants a hardcore match and issues an open challenge, but no one answers. His answer is to have one with himself, so he beats himself up with weapons. We have a referee for no apparent reason as Snow puts himself through a table. Bob Holly comes out to help Al but gets punched for his efforts. They brawl into the crowd and I guess this is a match. Back to ringside quickly and they hit each other with chairs. Referees pull them apart so this wasn’t really even a match.
Droz beats up Kevin Kelly for calling him a punk.
Steve Blackman vs. The Rock
Rock pounds away to start but Blackman comes back with his usual kicks. Steve pounds away but gets caught in a DDT for a big pop. Rock heads to the floor and FINALLY tells us that he’s cooking a nice Rockwich with extra Rock Sauce. Back in and Blackman gets in some kicks, only to miss a bicycle kick. Rock Bottom and Elbow end this.
Rating: D+. Total squash here which is exactly what it was designed to be. Not everything has to be some big and epic match, and this is a good example of that. Rock would go on to be world champion again very soon, but he just fought a midcard guy. The thing is: it worked fine. Try this and I think you’ll be ok modern WWE.
Steve Austin vs. The Corporation
It’s a gauntlet match and Shamrock is up first. Slugout to start of course with Shamrock taking him down. The fans tell Vince that he screwed Bret. Austin escapes the ankle lock and hits the Stunner, but here’s Test for the DQ. He’s the next man as well and is Stunned in less than a minute, but Kane runs in for the seconds DQ. Kane chokes away in the corner but gets caught by the Thesz Press.
Austin pounds away but Kane gets a boot up to stop Austin. There’s the chokeslam but Austin kicks out at two. The Tombstone is countered into a Stunner but Chyna comes in for the DQ. I think the match only ends in a pinfall which is why they keep running in. Chyna comes in and takes a Stunner so here’s Boss Man. Austin hooks a sleeper but Boss Man escapes and gets the nightstick for the DQ. Austin is dead so Vince comes in and pins him.
Rating: D. You can barely call this a match as it was really just a way for Vince to get one up on Austin. The longest of the falls lasted about 80 seconds, so what are you expecting this to be? Nothing to see here but Vince’s charisma is incredible when he’s out there with Austin which makes up for some of the flaws. Also it’s less than seven minutes long so how annoyed can I get?
Vince talks trash to end the show.
Overall Rating: C-. Definitely not their strongest show, but they set up the cage match pretty well. The world title match was glossed over though, which is pretty annoying in general. I don’t even think the stipulation (last man standing) was mentioned here at all. After those two matches though, the level of interest fall off a cliff. I had to look up the rest of the card and I just watched the go home show. That’s a bad sign.
Here’s St. Valentine’s Day Massacre if you’re interested:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/16/st-valentines-day-massacre-austin-vs-mcmahon-one-on-one/
Here’s the February 15th Raw if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews
Anyone
2. Last night Cena says how much he respects Flair, but he’s perfectly fine with Shield beating him up. However, when Ziggler, a guy that beat him clean the night before (no rules means interference is clean) tries to legally cash in a MITB case, Cena runs to the rescue. Was he in a rousing game of pinball earlier?