For the tag titles and likely a dark match.This was announced the week of the show and is going to be streamed for free on the WWE’s Youtube channel and WWE.com.  The champions have had the belts now for about two and a half months but were actually being used as jobbers on Raw for Big Show earlier this week.  I love the Usos but for the life of me I don’t get why they added in Gabriel and Kidd.  Apparently the team was formed on Superstars with the question from Kidd of “hey, wanna be a team” and a reply of “sure”.  That gets you in the title match at Mania now I guess.

As for a prediction, I’ll go with the champions retaining, but if this gets the title picture moving a bit it’ll be great.

Thoughts/Predictions?

It has to be up there.At the end of the day, I think it has to be.  You have a double countout, Rock having the power to restart matches all of a sudden, and the whole thing winds up being a setup for the next year’s main event.

Thoughts?

Wrestlemania 27
Date: April 3, 2011
Location: Georgia Dome, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 71,617
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Jerry Lawler, Booker T, Jim Ross
America the Beautiful: Keri Hilson

Well here we are. It’s the biggest night of the year and we’re heading to Georgia for the first time in Mania history. The main events are John Cena vs. The Miz for the Raw Title, Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio for the SD Title and HHH vs. Undertaker (not II of course). This is the night we’ve all looked forward to, and there’s that Rock guy here too. Let’s get to it.

The dark match was the US Title match but it turned into a non-title battle royal with Khali eliminating Sheamus to end it. I’m assuming the US Title match will be later.

Note that this is being written live so please excuse any marking out moments.

Keri Hilson, some singer I don’t know, sings America the Beautiful.

The voiceover guy here is like an old vaudeville voice which is kind of cool. Up first: here’s THE ROCK! The Great One looks…well great. The arena looks awesome too. Actually it’s a stadium but whatever. After posing forever he teases the FINALLY before hitting it. Bunch of Fruity Pebbles signs in the crowd. Rock promises this will be electrifying. Time for a little game: the Rock says Yabba, the people say Dabba. This somehow takes up FIFTEEN MINUTES overall and he does a huge IF YA SMELL to end it.

Video about the major moments in Mania history and the big ones tonight. Standard awesome intro video. I know they were cutting out the wrestling but this is ridiculous.

There’s the traditional big fireworks display and we get a match!

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio

WHAT THE HECK??? THIS IS THE OPENING MATCH??? The intro is great for Alberto as the video where the car comes from is designed to look like his driveway at his estate so he’s driving out of it. That’s awesome. Clay is here with Alberto. Here’s Christian to back up Edge. I think shenanigans may be afoot. This gets the big match intros because it’s a big match. Can’t fault their logic there.

I’m watching on a stream so I’ll do my best on the times but I make no guarantees on their accuracy other than in general. Edge fires away early on as Cole talks about the arm. Naturally that triggers an attack on said arm which is in trouble early. The arm work continues as is intelligent. Alberto goes to the floor so Edge flips forward over the ropes and lands mostly on Del Rio in a cool spot.

As the champion comes back in though Del Rio pulls him off the top in an armbar. The Cross Armbreaker is countered into the Edge-O-Matic as Edge gets two. Out of nowhere the armbreaker goes on but Edge rolls through to escape. Dueling chants begin. Edge goes up again but Del Rio gets the running enziguri to take him down for two. Christian and Clay get into it and Christian goes flying via a suplex.

Edgecution sets up the attempted spear but Alberto avoids. He stops in the corner and Clay grabs the arm and rams it into the post. The armbreaker goes on full force after a bit of a block. Edge reverses into a rollup/cradle move that makes Alberto break it up to escape. Edge gets the Edgecator and Alberto is in trouble. Clay tries to come in but Christian gets the tornado DDT off the apron to the floor to take him down. Del Rio escapes but walks into the spear to end this at approximately 11:00. Wow that was abrupt.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t terrible but dude, 11 minutes for this? That’s in the level of Cena/JBL at Mania 21. Not a bad match but it felt like a match that could have easily been on Smackdown as a regular main event. Alberto didn’t need to get the title yet so at least the right man won. Still though, 11 minutes?

Edge beats up the Rolls Royce post match. By that I mean he destroys it with a crowbar. Why Alberto doesn’t go after it is beyond me. Alberto yells for Christian for some reason. Oh ok Christian was helping with a ball bat. I need to pay more attention.

Cole talks about being in the main event and is in a suit, as is Jerry. They….they couldn’t really be putting that on last could they?

Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes

As Rhodes comes to the ring we get the video recap of this. In short, Rey hit Cody with a 619 with a metal knee brace that Cody exposed earlier in the match, injuring the Dashing features of Cody. If this is a few years later, look up Dashing Cody Rhodes for an awesome heel in 2010. Rey’s character this year: Captain America. Ok that’s not bad.

Rey “helps” Cody take the jacket off as Cody is all afraid of being seen. Rana takes Cody down but a shoulder block shifts the momentum immediately. Cody immediately goes for the knee which is a bit odd but whatever. Beautiful Disaster leaves Rey seemingly dead but it only gets two. I could definitely see this being the modern Bob Orton injury angle which could work for months if played up right.

A rana is eventually countered into the Alabama Slam for two. That’s one of the things I like about Cody: he incorporates things from his past into his offense, which is a sign of him growing. Also he stopped having the big Triforces on his boots which was definitely a face thing. Cody gives Rey a neck massage which I’d assume is to get his arms tingling right?

Mysterio tries to speed things up a bit but gets caught on top and it’s a delayed vertical suplex from the middle rope which is pretty awesome. That only gets two though. The crowd is mostly into this but is kind of quiet. Granted that’s what a superhero comeback is all about. Cross Rhodes is avoided and we hit the floor for a bit with Cody’s face being sent into the apron.

Back in the ring and a seated senton means we speed things up a little. Rey kind of looks like something you would see in a Captain America cosplay contest. Wheelbarrow suplex by Cody gets two. Rey finally gets him in 619 position but it gets caught and Cody hits a slingshot to send Rey’s throat/chest into the middle rope for two. Cody tries to take the knee brace off and manages to get it, meaning Rey’s knees are about to snap like a Kit Kat.

Rey fights him off to a bit and gets a moonsault press for two. Cody’s mask comes off and he gets sent into the 619 position. You can see Rey’s not moving the same without the knee brace. Rey goes up but the splash meets knees. Big kick to the head gets only two as this is a good match. Rey puts Cody’s mask on and I’m not sure if Cody knows it or not. Rey gets some running headbutts to send Cody reeling and a swan dive gets….two. Wow I would have thought that was the finish. The referee throws the knee brace out and Cody hits Cross Rhodes for the shocking (but good) pin at approximately 12:15.

Rating: B. I was into this and it was a rather fine match. Also, thank goodness Cody won here so he can continue his Phantom of the Opera kind of thing. I’m very pleased with this as Cody continues to be one of the best guys in the company at this point. I’d love to see him get a quick title feud with Edge but I doubt it’ll happen.

Snoop Dogg is with Teddy Long and Snoop is looking for talent for a tour he’s got coming up. Teddy has some WWE talent to audition for him. Regal does a rap and it’s again hilarious. Khali and Beth Phoenix do a song from Grease and get hooked more or less. Zach Ryder sings something that is apparently from a chick named Rebecca Black and Roddy Piper hits him with what might have been a coconut. Piper looks good.

Tatsu and Masters do We Will Rock You with Masters doing the pec dance to the drums. Horny is going to do a rap apparently but he can’t talk. Teddy and Snoop leave and Horny raps while the Bellas dance. At least we got the good looking twins.

Corre vs. Santino Marella/Kofi Kingston/Big Show/Kane

The change of Kozlov to Kingston was kind of a surprise but I’m pretty sure if was officially announced. I can’t complain a bit there either as Kofi should be on the card. Santino vs. Slater to start us off here. Big kick by Santino misses so it’s off to Show who cleans a few rooms. You can’t really say cleans house for one guy.

Show rams into Slater in the corner but Jackson runs him over. Everything breaks down almost immediately and Barrett takes Trouble in Paradise. This is moving around too fast to call. Cobra time and it hits Santino. The Knockout Punch ends Slater and the match in about 1:40. Yeah there was a point to this. No rating of course. That punch was SICK in the replay.

Rock hits on Eve in his first appearance in 45 minutes. He talks about making magical moments. For instance whoever comes around the corner next (without Rock looking) is going to get a magical moment with Rock. And it’s Mae Young. I was thinking it would be her. She wants the People’s Strudel. Rock says that Mae should be after Moses’ strudel. Rock have Eve escort Mae to her seat. Mae spanks Rock.

Rock does the around the corner thing again and IT’S AUSTIN!!!! I was hoping this would happen as it flat out needed to be done. This is like an old western. They’re both retired and it’s an incredible moment to say the least. They shake hands and say it was good to see each other. Totally AWESOME moment here and something that absolutely had to happen.

We recap Punk vs. Orton. In short, Orton punted Punk in the head two years earlier and cost Punk the title. Punk waited two years to get his revenge and sent the New Nexus after him. This more or less crippled the entire feud as it just died when Orton ran through Nexus the entire time. Oh and Orton had a bus for some reason and Punk hit him in the knee with a pipe or something so the leg is bad.

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Punk goes for the knee early but that gets him clotheslined. Out to the floor and Punk is sent into the steps but he jumps/steps over them which I don’t remember seeing before. He kicks the steps into the knee of Orton to take over. The fans chant for Orton as Punk hits a top rope cross body for two.

Orton fires back with the backbreaker and Punk is down a bit. He tries to fight out of the corner but Punk gets something like a jawbreaker onto the knee. That’s a new one. Orton gets caught in the Tree of Woe and Punk hammers away. Punk gives the sign for the GTS which of course doesn’t work as Punk does what any idiot villain does and walks around before he tries anything.

Randy escapes over the back and tries the RKO but gets kicked in the head for two instead. Punk goes to the outside but gets crotched. His reaction is awesome to say the least. The fans want a DDT off the top so Orton goes up. And the fans get something similar in the form of a superplex for two in a NICE callback to Orton’s papa (that was Bob’s finisher).

Punk fights back and actually gets the figure four around the post and does it to the correct leg! Leg lock back in the ring and it’s almost an Indian Deathlock. Orton fights out and gets the Angle Slam. Finally Cole doesn’t call it something stupid. Orton goes insane again and hits the Thesz Press to ZERO reaction. Punk fires back with kicks and a leg sweep and there’s the Anaconda Vice! The hold makes no sense given the knee work but it’s not going to be the finish anyway.

Orton is in trouble but he manages to roll out of it and into the ropes in a nice little counter. Punk goes to the apron and stands on the bottom rope because he’s not that intelligent. He gets sent into the post and the elevated DDT takes him down. Orton slams the mat and doesn’t break his arm this time. The face is awesome to say the least. He takes FOREVER though and you know it’s not hitting here.

Instead he backs up for the one legged punt because you know he can get a running start after not being able to stand a few minutes ago. Thank goodness Orton falls down on the approach. Punk looks all psycho and his hair is even freakier. He goes over to Punk and gets….not caught in the RKO as Punk shot out of the back. I thought it was a botch but that was intentional. Here’s your big RKO spot as Punk tries the springboard clothesline but jumps into a nice RKO to end it at 14:40.

Rating: B-. I’m not a fan of Orton but this was pretty good stuff. They gave it some time and the knee worked pretty well as Punk went into the air rather than having to jump. Pretty good here but you kind of have to wonder where this goes from here as well as where Punk goes. Granted that’s the point of watching tomorrow I guess.

Rock is with Gene Okerlund (do your own caps) who says that Cena’s #1 fan is coming here to confront Rock tonight. And it’s Pee Wee Herman. Gene wears Cena gear and Herman does the Rock’s line. I don’t care for Herman so this was nothing at all.

Hall of Fame time. Abdullah can barely walk.

Sunny looks good for the most part. She needs to just flash the crowd and get it over with.

Animal in a tux looks weird. Ellering is there too, complete with sunglasses.

Drew Carey is murdered by the crowd and rightfully so.

Armstrong gets no reaction at all, probably because no one knows who he is.

Duggan gets a nice ovation and there’s a bowtie on his 2×4.

And now for the one that matters. Yep the roof is gone.

We get a Wrestlemania Recall….which is from Raw. It’s Cole throwing soda in Lawler’s face. I hope this is next and it is.

Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole

Booker T and JR are on commentary with Josh. They both get intros, I guess to buy the guys time. As JR is coming to the ring, Cole interrupts him, complete with an orange hoodie and headgear and shorts. I give up. Cole runs his mouth about Lawler being old and all that jazz. Oh and he runs down the barbecue sauce. Well at least this isn’t the main event like they hinted at. Cole keeps stalling for time for Lawler which is fine.

Swagger comes out to no reaction at all. We get the pushups but in mid push the glass shatters and Austin is here with ATV and I think a new shirt. Cole took off the hoodie and is in a singlet. For no apparent reason Cole jumps off the apron when Austin is charging around it and has to hide in the box. Lawler comes out to his regular music thank goodness. He looks a bit like Shawn with his attire.

Somehow this is the best built match of the night. Lawler is in his usual attire in the ring as Cole stands on his desk in the Cole Mine to warm up. Austin says ring the bell and sends Lawler after Cole. Swagger charges and gets sent into the post and then the barrier. Cole begs off and is close enough to a mic for us to hear him. He offers a handshake through a hole in the box. Is that like a glory hole for idiots?

Lawler pulls on Cole’s hand and rams his head into the box. Jerry finally climbs into the box and beats the tar out of Cole. This is awesome. Jerry destroys him and gets him out of the box. Into the GM podium he goes and Jerry tosses him into the ring. Swagger gets up and drills Jerry to put him down. Cole gets something close to a baseball slide to the send Jerry down.

Ankle lock by Swagger when Austin is distracted. The comeback for this is going to be awesome. Austin counts incredibly slowly and Cole works on the knee. Cole might have a 3 Stooges tattoo on his back. That’s something I really didn’t want to know. The fans say Cole can’t wrestle. Well he’s not a wrestler so I think that’s ok. The fans think this is nonsense. Such an impatient generation.

Cole tries a Vader Bomb (screw that Swagger Bomb stuff) from the bottom rope and Jerry powers out of it. Jerry gets some punches in but Cole goes back to the leg. The fans say boring so Cole pulls a strap down and puts on the AnCole Lock. Jerry doesn’t seem to mind and kicks Cole off to wake up the crowd. He walks it off and Cole is caught.

A mudhole is stomped….kind of. Swagger throws in the towel and Austin is like WHAT? There’s a Stunner for Swagger as the fans are way into it now. And now it is time to pay. Austin looks at his watch and Cole slaps his hand away and SHOVES AUSTIN. Big right hand by Lawler and the beating is on.

The fans get behind Lawler as the punches come in hard and there’s a dropkick. With a point to the sign and the strap coming down it’s a jumping punch from the middle rope. That gets two as Jerry pulls him up. This has to end with the Piledriver. Jerry grabs the ankle lock and Cole taps. Austin makes sure it’s really a tap in a funny bit. Cole insists he gives up and there’s the bell. Dang it that should have been the Piledriver but the ankle lock ends it at approximately 14:00.

Rating: C. This was a letdown for me. First of all the ankle lock was a pretty weak finisher and Cole was on offense too long. It wasn’t bad but they needed to change a few things out there to really make it awesome. This needed a Piledriver but I can understand Cole being afraid to take it or whatever.

Post match it’s time for a beer bash and Booker gets in the ring. Jerry takes a beer but doesn’t drink it (he’s a known non-drinker). There’s a spinarooni for Mania and why is this about Booker T again? Stunner to Booker and more beer is consumed. Jerry hasn’t drank any it seems. We get an E-Mail of all things to interrupt this. The referee overstepped his boundaries and the winner is Michael Cole by DQ. Please let this be a late April Fool’s joke. Amazingly it’s not and Matthews gets a Stunner. And the show is officially killed.

This should have been screwupable and they screwed it up. I’m in awe of their utter stupidity here.

We get a video of Wrestlemania Week and I do not care. I’m still stunned at the utter stupidity of what they just did.

Lawler and Ross are on commentary now which is cool but they couldn’t do that without the whole stupidity thing there? Yes I’m harping on it but man that was idiotic.

We recap HHH vs. Undertaker with a package we’ve seen a dozen or so times now. In short, HHH wants to break the Streak because there’s nothing else for him to do.

Undertaker vs. HHH

There’s a rock version of Taker’s theme which is WAY too up tempo for him. Oh wait that’s for HHH. Oh my it’s For Whom the Bell Tolls by Metallica. That’s cool but dude, it’s HHH. Ah there’s All About the Game. That’s more like it. He has an army and a crown and yeah you get where this is going. Still cool though. Taker does his usual awesome entrance to Johnny Cash.

The song loops as the entrance takes too long. Or maybe that was just the second verse. The lightning goes off when Taker removes his hat. The crowd is surprisingly quiet. This is no holds barred and they slug it out immediately. Taker grabs him by the head and fires him over the top with ease. We go to the floor and HHH actually wins a fistfight. His reward is being thrown into the steps.

We set up the announce table (Spanish of course) but HHH spears Taker into the Cole Mine to destroy it and put Taker down. Taker looks up at HHH and is all ticked off. Back in the ring and they slug it out again. Taker works on the shoulder and here comes Old School. That of course doesn’t work but this time you can’t blame it on him shouting OLD SCHOOL at least. Another clothesline sends Taker to the floor as HHH is favoring his left arm.

Now they set up the American announce table as Lawler is in an Austin shirt. Pedigree is countered as is the chokeslam but there’s a backdrop off the table to the floor and he’s holding that arm and wrist again. Oh yeah that thing slammed into the ground HARD. The fans chant 19-0 as the match more or less stops. Taker busts out the Taker Dive which at least cleared the ropes and hit HHH. It wasn’t great but at least he hit a person and not the floor.

We start using the steps and someone shouts about Shawn either being here or not being here to save HHH. Taker sets for a tombstone I think but gets countered and hit with a headbutt. Taker tries a running charge but gets caught by a spinebuster into the table/through the table, whichever you prefer. This has been big spot, lay down, big spot, lay down for about 8 minutes now.

Back in the ring and a chokeslam gets two. Taker loads up the Last Ride but gets rammed into the corner. More dueling chants begin and HHH fires away with punches in the corner. Taker tries the Last Ride but HHH counters in a nice callback to Mania X7 (which had nothing to do with these two facing each other. That’s never happened at Mania. Silly people) Pedigree is reversed as is a big boot to the face, the latter being via a spinebuster for two.

HHH goes to the floor and grabs a chair which of course goes across the Game’s back. Pedigree out of nowhere gets two. Last Ride gets a long two as we’re in that same formula from earlier. Taker gives the throat slit but the Tombstone is of course….not reversed for two. HHH kicked out of the tongue sticking out thing! I know they’re wanting this to be epic and while it’s good they feel like they’re trying to be epic rather than actually being epic.

Taker sets for another Tombstone, this time on the chair. Instead it’s a DDT mostly on the chair to put both guys down. Somehow this has been going almost 20 minutes. They both struggle to their feet and there’s a decent Pedigree for a long two. If Scott Armstrong didn’t have the biggest hitch in his count this side of something with a very large hitch in his count, this would have been over a long time ago.

A third Pedigree is kicked out of as this is bordering on stupid here. We get it: you can kick out of the Pedigree now DO SOMETHING ELSE! Both guys are down and HHH gets the chair. BIG chair shot to the head of Taker and he’s in big trouble. Taker does his best Terry Funk shaking impression as HHH shouts what’s wrong with you. He gets grabbed by the throat for his troubles but Taker can’t hold it.

Taker says bring it on so HHH does a throat slit. Tombstone hits Taker and of course it gets two. They try to play this off as some huge thing but dude, no one thought that was going to end it. HHH goes to the floor and it’s sledgehammer time. HHH holds up the hammer but Taker pulls him down into the Hell’s Gate and HHH is in trouble. He drops the hammer and is in big trouble. HHH tries to stand but is fading fast. He gets the hammer again but can’t get a shot to the head. HHH TAPS OUT to end this at approximately 29:10 but I had some stream issues so I’m not sure how accurate that is to the second.

Rating: B. Well it was brutal, but at the same time did anyone really believe this was ending with anything other than a big sign that said 19-0? The whole big spot rest big spot rest got really annoying and it made the match feel a lot longer than it should have. Good stuff, don’t get me wrong, but at the same time it ran too long and that hurt it in my eyes.

Taker gets checked out by a trainer post match and they do the big exit with both of them leaving at the same time. Taker can barely walk and keeps falling down. He falls down next to the ring and they have to get a cart to take him out. I’m not sure if this is legit or not but I’m leaning towards it being so.

Good time for a Don’t Try This at Home no?

Wrestlemania 28 will be in Miami as we all knew.

Laycool/Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison/Trish Stratus/Snooki

Please….make it short. Dolph is officially the business associate. Not sure if they had covered that before but it’s official here. At least Laycool looks incredible. Trish should never be allowed to not wear leather. And here’s the draw, Snooki. Oh dear. Well I guess she’s an improvement over Bieber. I can’t wait for like three years from now when this is totally dated.

The girls go at it early and the guys pull them off. Trish and Michelle start us off officially. Trish tries to tag in Snooki early but I think the small one doesn’t want in. Matrish leads to an attempt at a Faithbreaker but Trish counters into a facejam. McCool counters the Stratusphere and they fight on the buckle with both crashing to the floor. Everything breaks down and Morrison hits Starship Pain to the floor to take out Ziggler.

Off to Snooki and let the booing begin. She does a handspring elbow into the corner which is still a stupid move. A cartwheel into the WORST SPLASH EVER ends McCool at 3:15. Snooki was in the match for a total of 12 seconds. Note to future girls wanting to be a Diva: don’t bother marrying Undertaker or working to become awesome. Get on a bad reality show and get in fights in bars. You’ll get wins at Mania. No rating due to it being short and it ticking me off. Match was nothing special to say the absolute least. Perhaps the worst celebrity match ever.

There’s a new attendance record for the Georgia Dome of 71,617. That’s always cool to hear.

It’s time for the main event of Cena vs. Miz. Yes, the Miz is wrestling in the main event of Wrestlemania. BE JEALOUS! No recap at all and it’s time to go. I guess we’re running behind. Ah ok here’s a package as we see Miz’s rise to the top and interspersed with various world title wins at Mania. Miz is looking at a screen watching all this. We get the DEMON CHILD and clips of him on Real World and Tough Enough and doing all kinds of stupid things before he got serious and AWESOME as a result.

This gets the music video treatment about how everyone hates Miz but he keeps winning. Miz having his back to the camera the entire time is great. This transitions into a video about the feud with Miz constantly getting the better of Cena.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. John Cena

Miz runs through some things that look like balloons saying AWESOME. This is MIz’s moment and it’s working. Riley has the varsity jacket with him here and Miz has his coat also. Must be chilly in Atlanta. Cena’s big entrance this year: a full on gospel choir. We actually have a prayer with clips of Cena growing up and being awesome I guess. They actually say Jesus here which is a bit different. This takes a long time also, as has everything else tonight. After the prayer the choir actually sings Cena’s theme in full on gospel style. And then he sprints to the ring in a new shirt.

Cena is of course mostly booed out of the building. This is listed as Cena’s 8^th straight Mania main event which is a relative term as some of them were in the middle of the card. The bell rings twice for no apparent reason and they lock up. Miz controls early but Cena gets a hip block to get us back to even. Cena with some nice technique to get a headlock but that doesn’t last long.

They’re in a long feeling out period here and Miz stomps away to end that. Miz takes over with basic stuff but gets caught in a gutwrench suplex for two. Miz misses his running clothesline in the corner which hit earlier. Top rope Fameasser hits for two. Big boot to the head of Cena gets two. They botch something so Miz gets a dropkick to the ribs to send Cena to the floor.

Back in the ring and Cena starts his finishing sequence but can’t get the FU. Short DDT gets two for the champion. A Let’s Go Miz chant starts up as he escapes the STFU and gets caught in a neckbreaker for two. Miz unhooks the buckle which gets him nowhere. Cena gets the STF but Miz grabs the rope. Riley sends Cena into the exposed buckle and Miz gets the Skull Crushing Finale for a long two.

Down goes the referee and wouldn’t you know it that it hits just a second before the FU. Riley comes in with the briefcase and down goes Cena again. Naturally that only gets two as the fans are finally back into this. Miz goes for the case but hits Riley and walks into a HUGE Attitude Adjustment for TWO! Wow I would have bet on that being the ending there.

Out to the floor and Cena kills him with a running clothesline to send him over the barricade. Big spear onto the concrete by the fans and that looked sick. They’re both dead and this is going to be a freaking double count out. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? This can’t be. That had better be a legit injury or we’re not done yet.

And here’s Rock to make sure this doesn’t suck. There’s an e-mail and Rock says that it doesn’t matter what the GM thinks so this is restarting, no DQ, no countout, no time limit. Cena goes for the FU immediately but walks into the Rock Bottom and MIZ RETAINS!!! The pin was at 19:30 overall, counting the big stoppage.

Rating: C-. Even with the ending this was still pretty boring. They’re not hurt which is always a good thing but dude, did we need a false finish in something like this? It’s the main event of Wrestlemania for crying out loud. I get that you needed Rock out there, but make something better than that. I’m not impressed here at all which is hard to do with me at Mania

Miz holds up the title post match and Rock looks at him. The beatdown is on and it’s a People’s Elbow for Miz.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a VERY hit or miss Mania and it’s going to have a very mixed reaction I think. A lot of the booking is just kind of out there, namely Cole/Lawler. I get that they’re setting up for future shows but at the same time this is WRESTLEMANIA! There’s some good stuff but nowhere near enough to make this really work.

There are times when you just do certain things and this is one of them. Not impressed here at all and this is a huge fall down from last year. Rock helped, but there’s only so much he can do. Summerslam and Raw tomorrow better be AMAZING. The ending helps this but certainly doesn’t save it. WAY too rushed of a show and that’s the downfall of it. I’ll probably have more to say on it later but that’s my initial reaction.

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Smackdown
Date: March 30, 2012
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Matt Striker

This is going to be a different kind of show. There were only a few matches taped on Monday and if this show is like last year’s, the majority of this show will be partially taped from Miami and Axxess. It’ll mostly be a big commercial for Wrestlemania with some wrestling thrown in on the side. That’s the same thing the shows all week have done and it’s really all they can do this week. Let’s get to it.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is the Louisville Cardinals. They’re evil and need to be destroyed.

As some of you probably know, usually I watch this show online on Friday afternoon so I can save time in the reviews. Well I did that today, and the show had no new matches and was a collection of old Mania matches. Apparently that’s totally different than what the US broadcast had so this is the second Smackdown I’ve done tonight.

Zack Ryder vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew starts off with a slam but Zack comes back with some speed and a dropkick. They go to the corner where Drew gets punched in the face. He manages to throw Zack up in the air and brings up a knee to take over. Off to an armbar now and Ryder is in trouble. A gutbuster puts Ryder down and Drew hooks a combination camel clutch/armbar. Ryder escapes but charges into a boot to put him right back down.

McIntyre does the go to the middle rope and jump off with the clear intention of jumping into the other guy’s raised boot spot. Ryder makes his comeback and hits the Broski Boot but walks into ANOTHER big boot for two. Zack escapes a powerbomb and Drew chases him into the corner but runs into a pair of knees. The Rough Ryder gets the pin at 5:38.

Rating: C. This was all you needed it to be. It covered both teams and hyped up the match a little bit. Not a great match or anything but it’s good to see Ryder getting clean wins, even over someone like McIntyre. I’m thinking Eve is going to play a role in the Mania match though, which isn’t a good thing.

We go to Miami where Lawler and Cole are on a set at Axxess. We see some of the stuff there, such as Undertaker’s Graveyard and the entrance you could walk down.

Video on Taker vs. HHH for the End of an Era.

Video on the Divas tag. I have no issue with looking at Maria Menunos. We’re never going to talk about Beth and Eve’s teased feud over Ryder again are we?

We see some of the art auction which goes to a children’s cancer center. Nothing wrong with that.

Recap of Punk vs. Jericho, I believe the same one from NXT.

Cole and King get in a flag waving contest.

We go back to Raw for the segment on Teddy vs. Johnny with the end of Otunga vs. Santino (they can’t show a full 90 second match?) which resulted in Miz joining Team Ace. We also get the Christian beatdown where he was put out of the match, and finally the Henry vs. Khali bit where Booker made the save for Teddy and joined the team.

Here’s Big Show in the ring to talk about his match on Sunday. He’s had some good success in this business. He won the world title in his first match and he’s won more since, but he doesn’t have a Wrestlemania moment. Wrestling in the main event for the world title isn’t a Wrestlemania moment? He says this is a bit different than most times he’s been at Mania. He can feel it in his mind, his gut and his heart. Cody is going to lose. Cody’s career isn’t going to get made. It’s going to get broken.

Video on Bryan vs. Sheamus.

Some legends weigh in on the Cell match.

Kofi Kingston vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho grabs the arm to start and works a hammerlock. Kofi speeds things up and hits a jumping back elbow followed by a clothesline to send Jericho to the outside. Back inside Kofi tries a springboard but Jericho takes out the ropes to knock him down and we go to a break. Back with Jericho in control but Kofi grabs a rollup for two.

A knee to the head gets two for Jericho. Jericho misses the crotch to the back of Kofi’s head while Kofi is in 619 position (that really needs a name) and Kofi hits the SOS for two. Boom Drop hits but Chris avoids Trouble in Paradise. The top rope cross body gets two. Lionsault eats knees but Kofi’s kick is countered into the Liontamer for the tap at 11:12.

Rating: B. Pretty solid TV match here but the ending was never in doubt. There was no way Jericho was going to lose two days before a world title match at Wrestlemania. I wish Kofi didn’t have to do the job, especially when he’s in a big match on Sunday but when you have 12 people in one match, that’s hard to avoid. Good match though.

We get the Rock vs. Cena segment from Raw to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a very good final push for Wrestlemania. I get that a lot of people aren’t going to be fans of this and that’s ok. The wrestling we got was limited but fine, as there was no way they were going to run the risk of a bunch of injuries. I’m really surprised Jericho performed at all. Good final push for the show, as this was more about getting us fired up for Mania than a regular show.

Results
Zack Ryder b. Drew McIntyre – Rough Ryder
Chris Jericho b. Kofi Kingston – Walls of Jericho

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Source

It’s Epico/Primo defending against Gabriel/Kidd vs. The Usos.  I won’t be giving my thoughts on this yet because I’m planning on a major WM Preview later tonight with thoughts on all the matches

Thoughts on this?

Brock Lesnar is in negotiations with WWE to appear at Sunday’sWrestleMania XXVIII pay-per-view event at Sun Life Stadium in Miami, Florida. The odds of the three-time WWE Champion appearing at show are ‘more than 50/50.’

Source: Pwinsider.com

Hokey smoke. Now this could be awesome, IF it happens. Brock coming back to set up Rock vs. Lesnar at Mania 29 would certainly work for me.

Thoughts?

Short question: is Shawn’s final match the best ending to an in ring career ever?If there’s a better one I can’t think of it.  He went out having a classic in the main event of Wrestlemania with some awesome storytelling involved.  I can’t think of a better way to go out.

Thoughts?

Wrestlemania 26
Date: March 29, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Matt Striker, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
America The Beautiful: Fantasia

Well, here we are. This has been one of the best hyped Manias in a LONG time and I could not wait for what was coming. Seriously, the card looked perfect and just about everyone that mattered was on it. The two biggest stars are fighting for the WWE Title. The Royal Rumble winner is fighting his former partner who turned on him.

Two legends are fighting in a career vs. streak match. This is old school booking at its finest and it’s worked like a charm. Pay attention Vince: keep things simple. Oh and Bret Hart and Vince are going to FINALLY end the Montreal Screwjob after over 12 years. Nothing major though. Let’s get to it.

Fantasia CANNOT SING. It sounds like an elephant stomping on my mother. The opening video is about everyone wanting to have their Wrestlemania moment. That’s the big thing indeed and that’s what it should be about. This is without a doubt the biggest night of the year and as JBL puts it the lights are on bright and everything is right here. That’s what Wrestlemania is all about: everyone wanting to steal the show.

It’s a beautiful thing and when it hits, there is nothing close to it in wrestling. They kind of run down the card without mentioning anything by name. This is really well done. That song I Made It is growing on me rapidly. It makes sense if nothing else so that’s all you need at times. Apparently this place is called the Toaster. Sure why not?

Unified Tag Titles: John Morrison/R-Truth vs. Big Show/Miz

Sweet GOODNESS there are some pretty ladies there. As X said, where are they the rest of the time? Yes, the pyro is cool in slow motion. Dang Miz’s theme music is awesome. Don’t expect a ton of criticism on this show as I thought it was awesome. The jacket on Miz…might be cool. I’m not sure though. I’d love to be the costume master for a company like this. It’s just awesome to get to pick the tights etc for these guys.

Imagine the memories of all of those various props and clothes in there. The ramp is really long so I have time to fill in here. We have a Spanish announce team. That and King being in a tux are nice things to get thrown out once in awhile. Now if only we had some John Wayne cufflinks. The arena looks awesome by the way. Apparently we’re in Romania for the first time ever tonight. Good show to start with I guess. Miz and Morrison start us off.

Morrison does that breakdancing legdrop of his. He’s athletic if nothing else. Show goes for maybe a Vader Bomb but Morrison kicks him in the head. This nearly kills Truth as Show falls backwards. Whose side is Morrison on here? Starship Pain misses. Show catches Truth’s plancha. That’s freaking insane. I mean Truth is a grown man and was coming down at Show. He just caught him. That’s insane. And Morrison goes for a springboard move and gets punched for the pin. What the heck was that?

Rating: D. This felt like about 4 minutes were edited out or something. It came from nowhere and just felt awkward. To be fair though, no one cared about this and it was just a way to get the tag titles on the show. Also, they knew this would be forgotten by the end of the show so why not just get it out of the way?

We recap the events of Mania week and it looks awesome. There was a golf tournament, an art show, and of course Axxess. Good night it looks awesome. Oh and there was a reading challenge too. Can’t beat that.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Remember, this is NOT a handicap match. DiBiase has the look far more than Rhodes does and it’s not even close. That could be due to the white boots he’s wearing that make him look like a freaking moron but that could just be me. Orton is WAY over. Thankfully the next night on Raw Vince got the hint and did the full face turn that he had been dying for the past few months. Remember, this is NOT a handicap match.

Everyone throws dropkicks to start. If nothing else Rhodes is cool for the Triforce. Legacy beats up Orton and you know what’s coming. Hey, did you know there are over 70,000 people there? We’re 20 minutes in and we’ve only mentioned that 8 times or so. Didn’t know if it was clear or not. Orton gets a few punches in and the place POPS. They try a leg sweep/clothesline combo but Rhodes completely misses his leg sweep.

Make that a chopblock as I forgot my move names there for a bit. Legacy EXPLODES! Rhodes channels his former jerk…I mean partner, Hardcore Holly, with an Alabama Slam. While DiBiase throws some bad punches at Rhodes, Orton gets up. In the coolest spot of the first hour or so, Orton hits the double DDT on Legacy. That was awesome, of which both members of Legacy have decent looking ones. Orton humps the mat as usual, waiting on Rhodes to get up.

No RKO though as Orton channels his inner Ray Guy (He’s a punter in the Hall of Fame. How weird does that sound?) and Rhodes is out for good. DiBiase goes for Dream Street but Orton gets a sweet little counter into the RKO and the POP! The fans love this guy to say the least. And we get the sweet pose. Love that thing.

Rating: D+. Not much here, but at the same time they did the right thing. Orton needed to beat these two to put them behind him and move on to a feud with a heel. The RKO got a pop so that’s all that matters. This was exactly what it was supposed to be. Oh and to all you morons that say one of Legacy should have gone over, you’re an idiot.

Don’t try this at home. I mean it. Do it at school or at your aunt’s house. Just DO NOT TO IT AT HOME!

Vickie and her heel Divas talk about their match. I don’t pay attention because Michelle looks good. Jillian comes in to sing and Santino shows up. He bites a Slim Jim and Jillian becomes Mae Young who of course kisses him. Another bite and it’s Mean Gene. Ok that makes things better. One more bite and it’s Melina. Dang that hair is hot.

Money in the Bank

Kofi is out first and is more or less the weakest of the three favorites. His hair looks like a buffalo came in it. He’s wearing white trunks here for some reason. He’s only been qualified for 6 days at this point. MVP is in second. No one cares. At least he’s not in red anymore. Bourne is third so we have our high flier. Three Raw guys so far. Fourth is Swagger to a nice reaction. He debuts the Angle look here and those pushups…don’t appear here.

That sucks because they rock. Shelton is 5th and he belong here. Matt gets a nice pop. Ziggler is in next and I legit forgot he both existed and was in this match. McIntyre, one of the other favorites, has the majority of his entrance cut which sucks. He’s IC Champion here in case you forgot. Kane….you need a better push. Yes I know that’s one of the biggest debates here. Get over it. He has a big black eye which might be from Shawn on Monday.

Christian gets a decent pop as the odds on favorite. There are a ton of ladders and there we go. Drew goes for it maybe 30 seconds in so of course it doesn’t work. In a cool sequence, everyone goes up but everyone else pulls them down. Bourne touches the case and FTS wants to cry. Swagger is in front of the turnbuckle, Matt is in front of him, a ladder is in front of them, Kofi is thrown into the ladder.

That…wouldn’t hurt as much as it would seem to. Ziggler almost gets there but we remember he’s Dolph Ziggler so we know it’s not ending yet. Kane powerbombs Kofi onto a ladder. Freaking OW. I’m not sure if I like the ten men or not. On one hand, it keeps things from being all boring and whatnot as you have someone getting hurt and then others coming back and then repeat. On the other hand, yeah right. Striker says some people think Swagger can carry the WWE. HA!

In a cool spot (shocking I know) there’s a ladder in the ring and Swagger is under it. Matt and Christian have a ladder each and ram it through the rungs to spear Swagger with it. I like that. Bourne and Christian fight on the ladder that’s bridged between the rope and the ladder in the middle like a scaffold. Bourne knocks Christian down and like an IDIOT hits a shooting star press onto Christian. Yeah he deserves to get beaten here.

Matt takes a front flip onto the scaffold ladder. Yeah he’s broken SMACK DAB IN HALF! Sorry the Oklahoma guy got me there for a minute. Naturally this is a spotfest, but what did you really expect? Kane gets a BIG pop when he makes a save. He throws a ladder at Ziggler which is very cool looking. Dolph gets put between a ladder and gets worn out with it. Yep it’s broken. Trouble in Paradise puts Kane down.

In a BRILLIANT spot, Kofi takes the two pieces of the ladder and walks from the corner to the middle using them as stilts. That’s AWESOME. That is why these matches stay awesome: making new spots like that. Drew makes the save but Matt stops him. I would have bet on that being the ending. Matt stays up there FOREVER but can’t get the stupid thing off. That’s just idiotic but whatever. Seriously, he has like 5 chances to get it and doesn’t do it.

Matt: YOU ARE A FREAKING IDIOT! Christian takes him down with the reverse DDT so Cole says it was a Twist of Fate. Yeah, the hint would be that Christian is ok. Swagger is back now and it’s him vs. Christian.

Swagger puts Christian down…and fiddles with the case…and fiddles with it…and writes the great American novel…and WINS THE FREAKING THING. THAT is your Mania shocker right there. No one, and I mean NO ONE saw this one coming. Match felt short, which you’ll hear a lot more tonight. Had to pause there. Norcal’s explosion is still giving us tremors.

Rating: B. This would start at a B in case you were wondering. These matches are ones that you can’t grade like a normal match based on the amount of people and the gimmick involved in them. While not as good as some of the others, the idea is cool.

Naturally WWE is going to have a PPV about it instead of letting it be a Mania exclusive but that’s their idiocy for you. Swagger winning is a legit shock though so I can complain about that one at all. Solid stuff though but I could have gone for more people in the ring at once and more spots.

Ad for Extreme Rules.

Hall of Fame time, and for once the class is AWESOME. When Mad Dog Vachon is the worst wrestler and smallest star, that’s saying A LOT. Gorgeous George’s wife is awesome. I want to see Uecker’s speech. That could be hilarious. Ted DiBiase is the best heel of all time. End of argument. Yes that includes Hogan and Flair. That laugh is just amazing.

FINK!!! He brings out the Class of 2010. The entire Hart Family represents Stu. I want to punch Bruce in the face.

We recap HHH vs. Sheamus. This was almost the world title match but they woke up and realized it should be a regular match which I can more than live with. Apparently Sheamus is jealous of HHH. That makes sense. I’d be jealous of his wife if nothing else. HHH eliminated him at Elimination Chamber to really set this up. We get Ultimate Warrior clips. That’s saying a lot.

Sheamus vs. HHH

The view from the top of the stadium with the tiny ring in there is awesome looking. They say no one has had a first year in WWE like Sheamis has. That’s true. When Lesnar did three times what Sheamus did in one year, it was WWF still. HHH gets a nice pop but it doesn’t hold up that long. Ok I’m wrong on that one. HHH has made Wrestlemania? Not sure on that one. HHH looks a tad chubby here. Maybe that’s just me. Ok the entrance is still cool.

He looks like a huge star and he’s supposed to. Talk about a contrast of skin tones here. HHH goes for a Pedigree about a minute in. That’s credited to Mania experience. Uh, why? Isn’t that called going for a finisher early? I’d want to do that in any match. Since HHH got big in the Attitude Era, we hit the floor. The figure four goes on and Flair is reference. Does that make AJ and HHH some kind of brothers? Ok, we get it: HHH is a veteran.

Oh and he’s the Ace of Spades now. What the heck does that even mean? Sheamus likes to yell when he kicks people. It’s rather annoying. Stop it. DO YOU HEAR ME YOU MILKY SKINNED IMBECILE??? Hey that actually worked. He channels his inner British Bulldog and hits a running powerslam. Nothing wrong with that. HHH breaks the momentum with a DDT. That might not work due to that hair though.

Striker: Tie your mother down, here comes HHH. So Striker has random shouts of incestuous bondage. Right. We get a nice finisher reversal sequence that ends with Sheamus hitting the bicycle kick. He gets another after HHH kicks out but both guys are down. Doesn’t that suck? HHH falls on his face and Striker says it’s experience. Lawler has some sense and says it might have been dumb luck. Thank you Lawler. And there’s a Pedigree from nowhere for the pin. Ok then.

Rating: B-. This was pretty solid I thought. It came off like a main event level match and that’s what it was supposed to do. Also, there was a big thing here about how Sheamus should have won. Ok, that’s freaking stupid. HHH is a bigger star and at the big shows, the bigger stars are supposed to win.

This guy debuted a year ago and he’s wrestling a 12 time world champion at Mania. What more do you want? It’s his best match ever by about a mile also, so this worked out fine. Good match, but not a classic like Lawler claims it is.

Slim Jim Ad. OH YEAH!

We recap Rey vs. Punk. This was a cool buildup I thought but it could have been a bit more. Rey sang Happy Birthday to his daughter and Punk interrupted him. Rey cost Punk his spot in MITB. Rey’s son Dominic is taller than he is. That’s the same kid from 05 in the Eddie feud. That’s just amusing.

Rey Mysterio vs. C.M. Punk

Oh sweet Punk has a mic. Punk needs to actually win a match once in awhile to make this gimmick work perfectly though. These promos get better every single time. Rey is dressed like a character from Avatar tonight. Oh just take me now. It can’t get stupider than this. It just can’t. Yep, Rey looks like a freaking moron dressed like that. He truly does. Gallows interferes early and it’s Punk in control. Straightedge prevails again!

Punk’s tights make me think of GI Joe for some reason. Aren’t the Na’vi really tall? See, the costume makes no sense. Punk gets a SICK kick to the side of Rey’s stupid looking head. We get a CM Punk (sucks) chant going and Rey kind of botches a backflip off the top rope into a DDT. It was close though. And Rey manages to tick me off again by doing the Eddie dance before throwing out a Frog Splash. HE IS DEAD. LET IT GO. I freaking hate the 619.

After some botched heel interference, the springboard splash ends this, saving him from joining the Straightedge Society and gaining him…nothing at all. Ok then. Not agreeing with the ending here, but it could be ok I guess. Oh and Cole says you never mess with another man’s family. I don’t see why not. Eddie did it and he gets a dozen tributes a year.

Rating: B-. Pretty good stuff here I thought. These two have decent chemistry together, but like I said I would have preferred Punk to win for a few reasons. If nothing else this could continue though so that’s a perk. Pretty solid stuff here overall.

We recap Bret vs. Vince. No way am I recapping this. If you don’t know this story by now, why are you here? The image of Vince in Bret’s sunglasses is cool.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Man that is weird to type. Bret is in street clothes here. That’s the right thing to go with I think, as if nothing else he’s likely not in the shape he was before so why embarrass yourself? Are you listening Flair? Vince comes out and says that he has insurance for this match and it’s going to be a lumberjack match. And of course they’re the Hart Family. Bruce is a douche, period.

When they came out, it couldn’t have been much more obvious what was coming. Oh great Bruce is the referee. And of course the Harts turn on Vince before the match starts. Bret’s first punch gets a pop. Bruce, ever the douche, counts when Vince is on the floor in a match with no countouts. Vince is on the floor and the whole family beats him up including a Hart Attack from the top via the Hart Dynasty. Vince hasn’t landed a single shot.

He does however find a tire iron under the ring. Bret gets about 10 shots in with the tire iron over a few minutes. He goes for the legs and the fans go nuts. Nope not yet. Nice tease there though. He sets for it again but it’s a low blow instead. Good to see some old Bret stuff in there. David slides in a chair…which Bret sits down in. Ok this is a bit awkward. Also it’s amusing that Lawler is behind Bret here when he used to HATE Bret.

SWEET chair shot from Bret. He goes OFF on him with it for a total of TWENTY chairshots, breaking Austin’s record of shots to Rock at X7. And then he puts on the Sharpshooter and kills the Montreal Screwjob forever. Vince literally did not hit anything, not even a punch.

Rating: A+. Now before X jumps down my throat for this, you have to consider what this was about. This wasn’t about a competitive match or storytelling or anything like that. This was about Bret getting revenge on Vince. Vince never should have gotten anything in here and literally he didn’t.

Bret completely destroyed him for ten minutes and then the match ended with Vince giving up to the Sharpshooter. That is all you could have wanted out of this and the most infamous moment in wrestling history can be laid to rest. That alone makes this perfect.

Now can we make Bruce Hart fall into a hole?

Mania 27 will be in Atlanta.

The attendance is announced. That’s always cool. Of course we launch fireworks that few in the arena can see. Ok then.

We recap Edge vs. Jericho, which is a simple revenge story. This year they kept things simple and it worked very well. Jericho was showing some emotion here and it worked very well. Oh and spear, spear, SPEAR!

Smackdown World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Edge

This should be good from an in ring perspective if nothing else. Edge looks to have lost a bit of weight. They start by feeling each other out as you would expect I would assume. It is a bit odd that they try to make their tag title reign sound important when they were together what, maybe a month? Jericho and Edge trained together? I don’t remember that. Jericho is controlling which is what you would expect. Oddly there was no control period by Edge. That’s most odd.

Hey, did you know Jericho beat Austin and Rock in the same night? Edge hits a nice running clothesline from the apron to the floor. It’s the simple moves that work the best sometimes. Edge hits a sunset flip from the middle rope. Ok then. Codebreaker is blocked. Pretty good match so far. Edge, complete with the great looking eyes, goes for a spear but in a SWANK counter, Jericho jumps over and more or less gets a schoolboy into the Walls.

Since Edge is a face though he doesn’t tap. Has that ever beaten a prominent face? The Edgecution hits but of course it’s not called that anymore because the announcers suck. They point out that Jericho never gets hurt. That’s very true actually. Jericho goes for a spear but winds up hitting the Codebreaker for two. Jericho goes for the ankle which makes sense. As someone with very bad ankle problems, it really is smart to go after them if you’re fighting someone.

Walls go on again but Jericho switches to a half crab. Well he did train with Lance Storm. The crowd is having fun with this. He gets to the ropes in case you were wondering. Jericho goes for the belt but that doesn’t work. Ok never mind it does since the referee goes down. A really bad Codebreaker gets the clean pin.

I would not have seen that one coming at all. Post match, Edge gets him on one of the tables and after a running start, spears the living tar out of Jericho into a barrier which clearly will be an injury spot.

Rating: A-. That’s likely too high but I really liked this match. It was entertaining the whole time through but it needed a few more minutes. I really like the surprise ending where Edge loses when he was more or less seen as a lock. That’s risky booking but here I think it came off very well. Very good match and definitely the best of the night so far.

We talk about the battle royal before Mania which Tatsu won. Good for him.

Face Divas vs. Heel Divas

Seriously do the rosters matter here? It’s 5 on 5. That’s all you need to know. Vickie is one of the heels so of course she’ll be the focus of the whole match. Beth looks great in white. That is all. So everyone beats up Vickie until Michelle makes a save. They alternate back and forth with everyone coming in and hitting someone with a finisher until we’re left with Beth and Vickie. Michelle puts Beth down and Vickie hits a “Hog Splash” on Kelly for the win. She managed to botch a cover. That’s hard to do. This was like 3 minutes long.

Rating: F. Seriously, what the heck was this? Eddie, I never thought you were anywhere near what people made you out to be, but you deserve better than this.

Time for Cena vs. Batista. I know you know the story so I’ll spare you the details. The crowd exploded for the graphic coming onscreen.

WWE Championship: John Cena vs. Batista

Love them or hate them, this is THE money match right here. Period and end of story. There is no other combination that is a selling point like this is right here. This is what Mania is supposed to be about: the biggest stars in the world squaring off for the world championship. I’ve loved the buildup for this and it was what I was looking forward to more than anything. Oh and Cena’s thing this year is a group of Air Force drill people spinning rifles until Cena runs through them.

Far better than last year if nothing else. We start with the feeling out period as the announcers argue over who is stronger. That’s an interesting argument actually. The idea is Cena’s neck injury from about a year and a half ago is still bothering him. Sure why not? Batista counters the FU into a DDT that was PAINFUL looking. Apparently if your opponent’s arms and legs go limp, he’s in trouble. Ladies and gentlemen, the insights of Matt Striker!

If your opponent is losing the ability to support their own weight, THEY COULD BE IN TROUBLE! And the fans have already turned on Cena with the Boo/Yay thing. And then there’s a very face pop for the Five Knuckle Shuffle which is countered into a spinebuster. You would think there would be a shift to booing there but not really. STFU is hooked and we’ve cranked it into a higher gear. In a cool spot, we hit a test of strength on the top rope. That’s new if nothing else.

Five Knuckle Shuffle from the top as he channels his inner Jannetty. Yes, a Marty Jannetty move landed in a Mania main event. Batista Bomb gets two and a mouth from Batista that could swallow Molly Holly’s head. Jannetty and Molly Holly got mentioned in this match. Wow. Cena gets a SWEET counter into the FU out of a reversed Batista Bomb. He rolled from slipping over the shoulders to what looked like a tombstone to the FU.

Amazing and he threw Batista about a mile but it only got two. In almost the same spot that his neck got hurt in, Batista catches Cena in a spinebuster from the top. ANOTHER Batista Bomb is countered into the STFU for the tap. It looked like a weak version but the shot of Batista’s leg made up for it. Cena being named a 9 time champion just makes it seem a bit weak though as it always does.

Post match, Cena celebrates with the crowd and we see a guy saying Cena sucks and Cena acknowledges him. That right there is something I freaking LOVE about Cena. Guys like Hogan got a mixed reaction like that and acted like they were still the most over thing ever. I’ve always hated that as it’s just idiotic.

It’s like when WCW said there isn’t a seat to be found as we scan over the crowd seeing all the tarped off areas and empty seats. Cena talks about the booing. It makes him seem more down to Earth which I like for a change.

Rating: A. Sweet match here as these two continue to be the Austin/Rock of their generation. Like I said this is the money match of this generation. The chemistry here is undeniable as Cena is one of the few guys that brings out the best in Batista. This is what a Wrestlemania main event match should be about and it delivered in a big way.

Another Extreme Rules ad.

And now, it is time. This had to be the last match, period. Flair vs. Shawn should have been as well but that’s another story. I’m again not bothering to explain this one as it’s Career vs. Streak. End of explanation. They call it the most anticipated match in Mania history. Not sure on that one.

The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Well here we go. This is one of two matches this show was sold on so you know it’s going to be good considering who’s in it. This many years after he debuted, Taker’s entrance is still awesome. Taker is rocking something that makes him look a bit like a boxer which works. We hit the staredown and Shawn does Taker’s throat slit. Keep that in mind. Taker dominates early, hitting Snake Eyes and Old School in the first minute or so.

He tweeks his knee on Old School though and Shawn goes for it. Old guys know psychology. Shawn goes for the arm which makes sense as it takes away the Tombstone and Last Ride. Oh and remember there are no count outs or DQs. Both finishers miss and the crowd is liking this a lot. And now back to the knee. The arm work was brief so that’s fine. Taker teases the rope dive but Shawn slides in and takes out the knee again. Good after what happened with that move last year.

Shawn busts out a figure four and much like Flair, PUTS IT ON THE WRONG LEG. The straight leg gets hurt. How hard is that to get? Nip Up is caught in a chokeslam. I like how he just launches him with those at times. An ankle lock is on as Shawn is fine maybe 8 seconds later. He gets the heel hook out of it and Taker is in trouble. He gets out though because Shawn isn’t an American hero. Shawn gets tombstoned on the floor. Ok then.

Shawn is dead apparently. Someone comes out to check on him and of course the match keeps going. Striker, CALM DOWN! The Last Ride hits but Shawn kind of counters into an X Factor so the impact is lessened. I can forgive him for being up quickly for that. Shawn gets out of Hell’s Gate with a nifty counter where he jumps over into a rollup. That was ni…SWEET CHIN MUSIC! Of course it gets two but that came from nowhere. The camera missed most of it.

I love stuff like that as it makes things feel more shocking. Taker blocks another kick and hits the biggest Last Ride ever for two. Shawn was at least 11 feet in the air. Awesome looking. Taker looks furious.

And now, we go to the floor. This might not end well. Why do they take such care of the monitors? I’ve never gotten that. And I mean in kayfabe before you freak out on me. Taker goes for a Last Ride through the table but Shawn counters and hits Sweet Chin Music to put Taker on it. He slowly climbs up to the top rope and launches a picture perfect moonsault.

Now if only he had hit Taker’s chest and not his leg. I legit thought his leg was seriously hurt for a bit until he got up on it a bit later. Back in the ring Shawn hits the THIRD superkick and IT gets two. This isn’t quite last year’s match but it’s VERY close. Another kick is blocked into a chokeslam but his knee is out. Tombstone also gets two and the crowd is losing it over these twos. Taker is TICKED. There go the straps. Shawn hasn’t moved yet.

Taker starts the throat slit but can’t finish it. Just like he did for Jeff Hardy, he can’t bring himself to hurt him anymore. After he shouts at Shawn to stay down, Shawn does his own throat slit, admitting he just can’t do it. He then does the unthinkable and slaps Taker. This was four days ago and 3000 miles from me and the look on Taker’s face scared the heck out of me. Taker is livid and picks up Michaels for a JUMPING TOMBSTONE.

Shawn is of course legally dead now and the career ends. No music plays at first, which is a very nice touch. The crowd isn’t sure what to do. I collapsed when he got the pin on my first viewing and it’s still a tiring match to watch. Taker staggers up and does his pose as 18-0 flashes up on the screen.

That, to say the least, is mind blowing. More on that later. Taker gets him to his feet and they shake hands like they should do. It’s Shawn’s moment as Mr. Wrestlemania gets a standing ovation. He walks up the ramp, and Jerry Lawler puts is perfectly: Shawn, it’s over. Good-bye. Thank you.

Rating: A+. It’s not as good as last year’s was, but this was an epic match to say the least. We knew who was going to win, but that’s ok here to me. The ending was perfect as Shawn gave up and was defiant until the end. If someone is going to end it, Taker is a fine choice and the angle was perfect.

It’s a very emotional match, but that takes nothing away from the quality of it. The best word I can think of for this is satisfying. Everything you could want is in here and it’s a fitting end to the show. Shawn, I was never a big fan of your’s, but your career was remarkable to put it as low as I can. I’ll miss you.

Overall Rating: A. GREAT Mania. Nothing at all feels slow on here at all. Even the Divas match is at least fast paced and at three and a half minutes with hot women, how much can you really complain? This had it all as there is history, title changes, surprised, tons of emotion and a perfect card. Shocky made a comment that it’s in the top three Manias ever and he might be on to something actually.

It’s behind 17 for me and off the top of my head that’s it from a quality standpoint but I haven’t thought about it much. This was a great show though with the big matches all being great and the others being very good as well. Nothing was truly bad other than the Divas match which is totally overlookable. Great Mania and ABSOLUTELY worth seeing. I loved it.

And now for three bonus sections. Of course I’m going to do more for a Mania review. It’s the biggest show of the year and I started my reviews with Mania.

To begin with, this Mania set up the upcoming year rather well. As always, Mania marks both the beginning and the end of the year. Cena is back on top which is fine as he should be there. Jericho was a shocker to retain for me and maybe they’re showing confidence in him.

Swagger, Sheamus, Punk, Christian, Kofi and others are ready to take this company over while the current generation of stars in Cena, Batsita, Orton and HHH can more than hold down the fort and bring those guys up. That’s how you have a good company: a well rounded new generation that is ready to take over. I have high hopes for the company as the roster is clicking and the stories have been great thanks to them slowing things down and going with basic angles.

The older generation is dying away as Montreal is finally laid to rest and Shawn is retired now. That’s how things should be as guys from 8 years ago like Cena and Orton are the top guys now and they have been groomed for these spots. I have high hopes for this company as this is the best its looked in many a year.

Item number two is the Streak. This my friends, is the most amazing achievement in wrestling history. “But KB, all it means is he’s been booked strong at one point a year.” Yeah that’s hogwash. To begin with, the Streak didn’t mean anything until 2001. I don’t think it was even mentioned until around that time. Second, think of this. Shawn Michaels is called Mr. Wrestlemania. He’s wrestled at that show 17 times.

Mr. Wrestlemania has not competed at Wrestlemania as many times as Taker has won there. Let that sink in for a moment. The Streak is an angle in and of itself. What was the argument between Shawn and Taker over both times? Nothing other than beating Taker at Wrestlemania.

There is no equivalent to it in all of wrestling and there never will be. To even be around for 18 years is an accomplishment. The thing is just amazing and hopefully it will never die. It’s my favorite part of the show and it never fails to deliver.

And now we move to the white elephant in the room. Shawn Michaels, arguably the best performer ever, has retired. Like I said I was never the biggest Shawn fan, but to deny his talent or the impact he had on wrestling would be ridiculously unfair to him and his legacy. He changed the way a lot of wrestlers perform and there are many reasons why, all of which you can see by watching him.

He stole the show so many times and retired as better than probably 95% of the wrestlers in the world. He went out on top on his own terms which is all you can want. He was one of the best ever and maybe the best ever, but that’s an argument for another time. I’m sad to see him go, but glad that he went out like this. In his speech the next night on Raw he more or less said he wasn’t going to TNA which is great as he would likely wind up jobbing to people beneath him.

Also, if he ever wants to, Vince would welcome him back with open arms. His exit was classy and perfectly done and to me it would be a shame if he came back, but I could live with it. It’s sad to see him go, but nice at the same time as he can go in peace. Have a good retirement Shawn. You’ve earned it.

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 29, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

I really hope this is an improvement over last week’s less than stellar effort. The main story is probably going to be Hogan being convinced to take the GM job which we all know that he’s going to take. Hopefully they have more time for Storm this week as he got pushed aside for Hogan and Garrett last week, which is ridiculous but such is life in TNA. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week with Dixie, Sting and Hogan making a decision about the GM spot.

Dixie says she’s given Hogan a week to think about it and hopefully she’ll know some more tonight.

Here’s Roode with additional security this week. Wasn’t he not supposed to be seen until Lockdown according to his lawyer? Roode says you all better respect him because without him, this company is nothing. At Victory Road, Roode accomplished his goal and proved that he’s better than Sting ever was. As for Dixie, if she wants to stick her nose into the champ’s business, she’ll get what’s coming to her. As for what the lawyer said last week, it only has to do with him wrestling.

The security is here for Storm’s benefit, not his own. When you’re the champ, you don’t need any luck. That brings out Storm who makes fun of the mall cops. Storm goes after Roode but Bully Ray runs out to deck Storm. Storm gets in one shot and Ray runs. Cowboy tries the superkick but Roode runs. Storm says he wants both Roode and Ray tonight and the champ says ok.

Gail gives Madison a tiara/crown. She’s the queen again.

Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne

Madison jumps her during the entrance and Tazz has nothing to say. How in the world did he fall from a tough miserable man to Pigeon Man? Madison takes over to start but Velvet gets in a boot to set up a basement dropkick for two. Madison gets in a few shots and a slam but Velvet comes back with a “spear”. A “bulldog” puts Rayne down the sitout Pedigree (apparently called In Yo Face) ends this at 2:58.

Velvet says she’s coming to get her Knockouts’ Title back.

Ray doesn’t like getting chummy with Roode for tonight.

We go to what looks like a park where Hogan and Dixie’s meeting is recorded. Hogan takes some of the blame for the whole going crazy and taking over the company. This goes on for a few minutes and basically is Hogan saying I used to be great but I don’t know if I’m right for it anymore. Dixie says we need you and begs him a bit because that’s what you have to do with Hulk. The end result: they’ll talk more in the arena tonight. This ran about five minutes which we’ll never get back.

We recap Crimson and Morgan’s breakup. They fight next.

Angle says no rematch for Hardy because Hardy is a crybaby. If Hardy gets a win over Mr. Anderson tonight, he can have his rematch.

We get ready for Crimson vs. Morgan but here’s Austin Aries to interrupt. He says he’s got a problem right now and that problem is called Bully Ray. Ray interrupted him in a title defense last week and that’s not ok. Aries’ balls are as big as Ray’s calves. He respects a guy like James Storm who stands up for himself, so if Storm wants a partner tonight, Aries would love to help him out.

Matt Morgan vs. Crimson

They’re brawling in the aisle as we come back from a break. Into the ring they go with Morgan pounding down onto the head of the Red Enthusiast. Crimson makes a comeback and they head to the floor. Back inside with Crimson in control but Morgan comes back with some rights….and there’s a spinebuster to put him right back down for two. Crimson misses a spear in the corner and Morgan takes over, but they brawl to the floor and it’s a double countout at 3:48.

Rating: C-. What exactly were you expecting here? This has been going to Lockdown the entire time and everyone has known it. The match there won’t be bad and I really hope they don’t blow the winning streak (as lame as it is) on Morgan. Not much to see here but some of Crimson’s power stuff wasn’t bad. He needs to talk more though.

They brawl out of the arena.

Joseph Park goes to look for Abyss info in the technical truck. Apparently he (Joseph) used to play college football.

Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy

If Hardy wins he gets a shot at Angle at Lockdown. The Guns are back next week apparently. Feeling out process to start with no one having a clear advantage. The announcers have to talk about the Bischoffs because this is TNA after all. Now a shift to talking about Hogan. Jeff hits his double leg between Anderson’s legs for two but Anderson comes back with elbow drops.

He calls for the Mic Check but Jeff elbows out. Twist of Fate is countered and they ram heads with Jeff falling to the floor. And here’s Kurt to jump Hardy. He hadn’t done it yet when I typed that. It was just that obvious. Low blow and a post shot before Jeff is sent back in and the Mic Check ends this at 4:27.

Rating: D+. Nothing of note here because of the ending but it couldn’t have been more obvious that they were doing that. Angle vs. Hardy will happen at the PPV I’m sure, maybe in Lethal Lockdown. Either way, nothing match as they wanted to keep both guys looking strong which is understandable.

Here’s the debut of Longnecks and Rednecks, Storm’s music video. It’s set in a bar and has some clips of Storm in TNA.

ODB and Eric plan the wedding. This is annoying. Eric wants to wear the dress. ODB finally gives up and fires the good looking blonde wedding planner. They’re going to get married three days before Lockdown inside the cage. That’s in two weeks.

Here’s Eric with yet another challenge for Garrett. Eric talks about how great he is and how he has a contract that says he can get TV time whenever he wants. Every day he makes a checklist of what he wants to accomplish. On his recent list, he’s wanted to get rid of Sting as GM, get Dixie to find a less competent GM, and increase his personal wealth, all of which he’s done. However, he can’t get rid of his son, so he calls Garrett out right now.

Eric says that Garrett has a chance to leave with his health, because at Lockdown Eric wants to see him face Gunner again. Garrett can walk away right now though, but Garrett grabs the mic and calls Eric a jerk. He’s not going anywhere and putting him in a cage is a dumb idea.

Video on Storm training out in the country. He talks about how Roode broke up Beer Money and how the fans want him to take Roode out.

Hogan arrives at 10:30.

Bully Ray/Bobby Roode vs. Austin Aries/James Storm

Aries and Ray start but after Ray runs his mouth for awhile he bails. Storm tries to tag himself in to face Roode but the champ runs. Aries takes Roode down and we take a break as he wants the Bully. Back with Aries getting what he wants as the announcers talk about Hogan’s decision. Aries takes Ray to the mat and makes him look like a fool before chilling in the corner. He pounds on Ray but charges into a big old boot.

We get into standard tag team match formula with the heels pounding on Austin with double teaming tactics. Aries elbow Roode down and takes out Ray with a missile dropkick. There’s the hot tag as Storm cleans house. Roode is caught but Ray makes the save. Closing Time hits Ray and Roode spits beer in his face, allowing the Last Call to hit for the pin at 12:22.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t all that impressed here. Most of the match was Aries getting beaten on until we got down to the ending. Still though, Storm isn’t getting much time to show off which isn’t a great idea as he’s been the hottest thing in the company for months now. Not a terrible match, but nothing we haven’t seen a dozen times.

Here’s Dixie to bring out Hogan for the big decision. She believes in Hogan and wants him to take the position. Is it the one he demonstrated in his sex tape? Hogan says he doesn’t really want to do it because of what happened with Immortal, but here’s Sting to keep up the begging and worship of Hogan, because that’s what this company is all about. Oh and he brings out half the faces with him (D-Von doesn’t even bring his belt with him). All the big name faces are there: AJ, Storm, Anderson, Morgan, Hardy…..and Garrett of course.

Sting kisses up to Hogan and says take it already. Hogan wants to make sure it’s a clean slate and wants a guarantee that Sting will ALWAYS have his back. Sting wants to make sure that it’ll be the Eye of the Tiger Hogan. He says he’ll have Hulk’s back and Hogan takes the job, of course. Gee that was such a big sacrifice for him. Hogan celebrates with the rest of the good guys to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a step up over last week’s show but I really don’t like the way TNA seems to be going. It seems that they’re going more towards the idea of talking and drama rather than wrestling (9 matches combined in two weeks) and focusing more on Bischoff and Hogan. Tonight they didn’t go two minutes without talking about Hogan’s decision and that’s not good when they’re coming up on the second biggest show of the year. It wasn’t a bad show by any means, but I don’t like the way things seem to be going.

Results
Velvet Sky b. Madison Rayne – In Yo Face
Matt Morgan vs. Crimson went to a double countout
Mr. Anderson b. Jeff Hardy – Mic Check
James Storm/Austin Aries b. Bully Ray/Bobby Roode – Last Call to Ray

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WWF Wrestling Challenge
Date: January 10, 1988
Location: Civic Center, Fort Meyers, Florida
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Hopefully this week is a normal episode in this series. From what I can tell this is a series of squashes plus some highlights from a SNME match with Bundy and Hogan which is really there for the post match stuff. Other than that there’s not much going on as the stuff for Mania wouldn’t get rolling until February. Let’s get to it.

British Bulldogs vs. Steve Lombardi/Terry Gibbs

Gibbs and Smith start things off as Heenan is saying the Islanders are innocent in the Matilda theft. Off to Lombardi and the Kid. There’s the snap suplex and it’s off to Gibbs. We get an inset interview from the Islanders with an empty leash which apparently explains that they don’t have Matilda. Lombadri gets in some offense on Dynamite but a clothesline puts Steve down. Back to Smith for some suplexes. Powerslam puts him down but Gibbs saves. The gorilla press headbutt combo ends this.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here but the Bulldogs continue to be awesome. It was a backdrop for the feud with the Islanders which is fine. Heenan’s crazy laughter is pretty creepy in its own right. Nothing to see here as a match but the Bulldogs were totally awesome and made up for the squash aspects of the match.

We get a clip of Matilda being dognapped which is a couple of minutes long. Basically there was a Bulldogs vs. Islanders match and Matilda went after Heenan. The Islanders got knocked to the floor so they stole Matilda.

Jack Tunney says that until Matilda is back, the Islanders are suspended without pay.

Ron Bass vs. Omar Atlas

Atlas tries to use speed which works for about thirty seconds. Heenan spends the match ranting about Tunney and the banning. Bass gives a quick inset interview about how tough he is. A modified Pedigree (no arm trap) gets the pin easily for Bass.

Dino Bravo has a new manager: Frenchy Martin. Bravo says he’ll be coming after Hogan and the title this year.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Dusty Wolfe

No name for the jobber here. Total dominance by Bigelow who shows off with some nice jumping stuff. Bigelow misses a charge in the corner and Gorilla names the jobber: Dusty Wolfe. Bigelow brushes off the offense and hits a suplex followed by a slingshot splash to literally squash Wolfe.

We go to Gene for an explanation about the Rumble Royal. Yes that’s what he said. He explains the concept and brings in the Killer Bees who are excited to be in it.

Danny Davis/Hart Foundation vs. Doug Wellington/???/???

Davis starts with let’s say Wellington. Clothesline gets two for Wellington and it’s off to Jobber #1. Bret comes in to run him over and drop an elbow before bringing in Neidhart. Here’s Jobber #2 and I don’t think Gorilla knows their names either. Hart Attack and we’re done quick.

Here are the highlights from Hogan vs. Bundy which runs like 10 seconds and is Hogan whipping Bundy into the corner and dropping the leg for the pin. Post match Andre comes in and chokes him out. The British Bulldogs come in but can’t do a thing. An army of guys come in and Duggan hits Andre with the 2×4 to break it up.

We go to DiBiase and Virgil who bring out Andre and Heenan as his latest purchase. This was a common thing back in the day: this promo aired “in the arena” on both Superstars and Wrestling Challenge. It’s the same thing and it ends with Andre saying he’ll get the belt for DiBiase.

Jerry Gray vs. Sam Houston

This is actually joined in progress for some reason. There’s nothing to see here. Gray hammers on him for a bit, Houston hammers back, a back elbow puts Jerry down and the bulldog wins it.

Greg Valentine vs. Pete Sanchez

Total domination with a lot of slams from Valentine. He sends Sanchez to the floor and puts him down inside with a belly to back. Elbow drop and figure four end this quickly.

Koko B. Ware vs. Rick Renslow

Renslow is a very hairy man. He jumps Koko to start but gets knocked down with a variety of dropkicks. Ghostbuster (brainbuster) ends this. It was barely a minute long.

Steamboat is looking forward to a good year in 1988. He has another mouth to feed now because he has a son. Steamboat wants the IC Title back and he wouldn’t mind getting his hands on Rick Rude either.

Gorilla gives us a preview of next week and we’re out.

Overall Rating: D. I really wasn’t that into this one. The longest match was about three minutes long and the matches were somehow more boring than on Superstars. It’s not terrible I guess but it’s nothing that you’re going to want to watch on a regular basis. Naturally that’s what I’ll be doing, but I have an unhealthy obsession with this time period in WWF history. Bad show, but it was about what you would expect on this show.

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