Royal Rumble 2011
Date: January 30, 2011
Location: TD Bank Garden Arena, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

Well we’ve finally, and I do mean FINALLY arrived.  This is the first 40 man Rumble and while I’m still not behind the idea it could be good I guess.  There are only 4 matches tonight: the Rumble, a Divas match and the two world titles.  It should be fun as WWE has been on a straight up roll recently.  Let’s get to it.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Edge

Well you can’t say they’re going easy to start.  And Edge’s pyro doesn’t go off.  Remember that the Spear is banned here and if Edge uses it then Ziggler loses the world title.  Vickie comes out to do the intro and tries to start a Spear chant which is kind of funny.  We get big match intros too which is always nice.  Lawler: “Ziggler is just like Santa Claus.  Everywhere he goes he takes that old bag with him.”

Dang Edge goes from winning the match to starting the show the next year.  Quite a drop…yet he has a title here.  I love logic or whatever you call it in wrestling.  Striker is doing a great job of tossing softballs up for King to get good lines off of.  Lawler has always been a guy that needs someone to set him up but once he gets a start he’s fine.

Edge controls a lot early on with some basic stuff.  We hit the floor and it’s all Edge.  Ziggler gets a kick to the side of Edge’s head as they come back in to get his first advantage.  Off to a chinlock now as the LET’S GO EDGE chant gets going.  Sunset flip is blocked for two.  More chinlock and this time a longer version of it.  Big elbow drop gets two.

Dolph gets a running charge to send Edge out to the floor and into the barricade.  Back in that gets two.  Hey look it’s a chinnlock!  Edge fights up and a double cross body puts both guys down.  Stinger Splash in the corner misses by Zigs.  Ziggler gets that Downward Spiral into a Stunner for two.  Edge counters the Fameasser into a sitout powerbomb for two.

Uncharacteristically for Edge he goes up top but Ziggler beats him to the punch.  Cross body off the top is rolled through for a VERY close two by Ziggler.  Dropkick gets two on Edge.  Zig Zag is blocked and Edge busts out the Edgecator (modified Sharpshooter) for two.  Edge misses a charge at the ropes and the Fameasser hits for two.

Big Boot puts Ziggler down and Edge sets for the Spear in the corner.  Vickie like an idiot, yells at him to not do it.  Ziggler wants the sleeper but gets caught in the Edgecution but Vickie grabs the referee.  She and Edge get into it and Kelly of all people comes out to beat on Vickie.  As Edge is watching the catfight a Zig Zag gets two and that more or less seals the ending here.

Dolph gets the sleeper and Edge is fading fast.  Oh of course he fights it off.  He manages to get a big jawbreaker out of it instead and down goes the referee.  Vickie is down as well so there’s the Spear.  Edge pulls an Eddie and lays down too.  Cole: SOMEONE HAD TO SEE THAT!  He’s totally right you know.  Edge uses an Unprettier of all things to end it.

Rating: A-. This was a solid back and forth match, but I really don’t like the Spear in there.  Striker calls it the Unprettier which is supposed to be the Killswitch I believe?  Anyway this was a very good match with Ziggler getting some very close near falls out there.  It’s your regular Rumble match that had a challenger who simply wasn’t going to win but Dolph looked great.  Very good opener indeed.

Mania is 63 days away!  Naturally we have the Chamber in there which is going to take away a lot of that time.

We recap Miz vs. Orton which goes back to Miz cashing in.  That’s still sweet and was perfectly done.  DEMON CHILD!!!  Also Miz beat the tar out of Orton on Raw.

Miz and Riley say Miz will win and insult Boston.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. The Miz

Cole talks throughout the WHOLE entrance and then in the ring he says that this is a big match for Miz.  Thanks for clearing up that defending the world title on PPV against one of the biggest stars of all time is a big match.  Miz chant to start as it’s all Orton early on.  Back in the ring as Orton stomps away and Lawler and Cole get into it as always.  I’m still thinking that results in a Mania match which it should.  Lawler deserves a match at Mania.

Orton beats him down in the corner and Cole says this is unfair to him.  Nice flashback to Heenan in 92.  Riley interferes and here comes the Champion.  Orton fights back but misses a charge in the corner to give Miz the advantage back.  The Miz is a Triple crown winner.  Let that sink in for a bit.  Ok he kind of is at least.  Corner clothesline gets two.  More beatdowns and a knee to the ribs get two.

Orton is able to get back in there with a kick and up the ropes we go.  Superplex gets two as Cole talks about Riley.  Elevated DDT is countered by a backdrop and we hit the floor again.  Back in Miz gets two.  Miz goes up and a double axe gets two.  He throws on a chinlock as it’s all champion here.  Back to the floor one more time and Orton eats the post.

He beats the count at 9 and the beating is on again but this time with Orton in control with the Thesz Press.  Powerslam sets up the stomping.  Orton sets for the powerbomb but Riley distracts him.  Miz gets that backbreaker/neckbreaker combo he’s been using lately for two.  Angle Slam hits so Miz wants to get the title and leave.  Instead Orton kills him with a clothesline.

Since we’re looking at a split screen replay we miss what Miz hits to get two out of nowhere on Orton.  Miz misses a kick and Orton grabs a rollup for two.  Elevated (called Suspension by Striker which works also) gets two.  He sets for the RKO and HERE THEY COME!  It’s the New Nexus minus Punk who stare down Orton.  As the referee is distracted Riley gets in and in an AWESOME spot, Orton picks up Riley and LAUNCHES him over the referee and onto Nexus.  Riley was AIRBORNE!  There’s the RKO but Punk runs in with a GTS and Miz retains!  Cole jumps up and down like a little girl in celebration.

Rating: B. Good match but definitely not as good as the previous one.  The thing is that with a show like the Rumble, everything besides the one big match is pure bonus.  The two title matches have been rather good so this show is already looking up.  This was very good stuff for the most part here which is pretty much expected.  If nothing else it gives us some new direction.  Not bad at all here and a pretty good match.

Cody Rhodes gives a prepared statement while we can’t see his face which is always funny.

Divas Title: Natalya vs. Laycool

Just before the match starts we get an E-Mail, making it a fatal fourway and he adds….Eve?  Uh…ok.  Oh and the GM makes fun of Cole and all the people that complain about him.  No tagging here of course.  There isn’t much to say here as it’s an insane spot fest for the most part.  Natalya gets the double Sharpshooter on Eve and Layla which is a great visual.  Layla gets the neckbreaker on Natalya.  There isn’t much to say here like AT ALL.  Michelle kicks Layla, Eve wins the title with a moonsault.  Natalya might have pinned Michelle at the same time.

Rating: D. This was pretty bad overall.  It was a mess of a Divas match which is bad as usually they have some good stuff going for them and certainly have been recently.  This was bad and it was the epitome of a bridge to the Rumble.  Speaking of which, let’s go to that.

Bellas/Gail/Bryan segment.  It’s stupid and the same thing from Monday but with the Bellas pretending to be nice with flowers.

Rumble By the Numbers.

Royal Rumble

Punk is #1 to the shock of no one, and to no one else’s shock, Corre has a member in at #2 but they all surround the ring.  Punk gets beaten down by everyone until Nexus comes down for the save.  Cole gets an E-Mail which says STOP IT!  Everyone but Punk has to leave and only Punk is in at the moment.  LOUD Punk chant and #2 is Bryan.  The IWC just orgasmed loudly.

Bryan speeds things up and takes Punk down with some nice shots.  It’s dueling chant time as Bryan hits the top rope dropkick.  In at 3 is Gabriel.  Gabriel beats Punk up with ease but misses the 450 and Bryan tosses Justin easily.  The timing is absurd already as you expected it to.  Number 4 is Zach Ryder.  He gets both guys down in the corner and manages to get a Rough Ryder on Punk.  Bryan throws him out with ease as I hope we’re not going the 95 route.

Regal is in at #5 and he cleans house which isn’t very dirty at this point.  Lots of suplexes all around.  Regal and Bryan slug it out with European uppercuts which surprisingly Bryan wins despite not being, you know, European.  Bryan kicks both guys with ease and we get #6 in the form of Ted DiBiase.  Backbreaker for Bryan and dropkicks to him and Regal.  Down goes Punk to the following clothesline.

Bryan vs. Regal and DiBiase vs. Punk for awhile which gets us nowhere.  Seventh is Morrison to a BIG pop.  Springboard kick puts Regal down and Morrison cleans house, including with his eternal rival in Punk.  C4 to Bryan.  I had Morrison as a dark horse but methinks that’s out the window.  He gets thrown by DiBiase but lands on the apron.  Morrison gets launched to the railing and GRABS THE WALL like freaking Spiderman, climbs up to the apron, tightrope walks it to the steps and gets back in.  Ladies and gentlemen, that is not going to be topped tonight.

Tatsu is #8 and he does nothing at all.  Ninth is Husky Harris.  Regal went out somewhere in there that I missed when I was dying from Morrison’s wall grab.  Harris immediately gets in front of Punk for defense so Morrison and Bryan try to kill him.  He’s 23 and the youngest person in this Rumble.  That’s rather impressive.  We get to ¼ of the way through this with Chavo.

Seven people in there now as Gabriel, Ryder and Regal have been eliminated so far.  Three Amigos to DiBiase but Punk cuts him off.  And never mind as he takes three of his own.  Punk’s get broken up so it’s suplex time to Morrison.  Here are some for Bryan as well.  He must have done ten suplexes in like 30 seconds.  This is kind of cool actually.  FINALLY he gets the third in a row.

Number 11 is Mark Henry to clear out some dead weight.  There go Chavo and Tatsu.  Punk beats Henry down a bit as it’s time for JTG to be #12.  This portion of the Rumble brought to you by not Michael Hayes.  JTG, Henry, Punk, Harris, DiBiase, Morrison and Bryan in there at the moment.  Hey I’ve actually got this up to date!  Number 13 is Michael McGillicutty to give Punk some backup.

Punk tells him to HURT EVERYBODY.  There goes JTG as we’re getting a bit cluttered here.  Granted a lot of that is Henry and the midcard is well represented.  Harris and McGillicutty put out DiBiase to make room for Masters at 14.  Masterlock to Punk but he can’t get him out as McGillicutty makes the save.  Bryan hammers on Masters as #15 is Otunga.  That makes four members counting Punk in there at the moment.

Bryan is out almost immediately and Masters joins him soon.  Nexus cleans house and gets Morrison out too.  Over to Henry now and yep he’s gone too.  Just Nexus left in the ring now.  Tyler Reks is the sacrificial lamb at #16.  How long can he be unknown for?  There he goes of course.  So are we just waiting on Cena now?  I think that’s pretty clear.  In at 17 is Kozlov who has history here.

Why not just wait on the floor and wait for like five people to get together to at least have even odds?  Vladimir is out with ease.  Punk gets all meditational on us and it’s Truth in as the Rumble is now legal.  Striker agrees with the whole wait it out.  This is a great way to run through some of the weaker guys though.  Punk gets the corner clothesline and bulldog.  In between, he looks at the camera and raises the roof shouting WHAT’S UP in a sarcastic voice.  Funny stuff.

Truth is gone.  And here’s trouble in the form of the Great Khali.  He chops them all down and gets rid of Harris to break up this blockade.  GET BETH PHOENIX STAT!  Naturally in next is Mason Ryan (20).  India vs. Wales goes to the darker skinned ones until Ryan gets him out.  BOOKER T IS NUMBER 21!!!!!  SCREW YOU MAIN EVENT MAFIA!!!!!  Epic pop for him too and Booker looks awesome.

Kicks all around and a Book End to McGillicutty.  SPINAROONI!  SPINAROONI!  OH MY GOODNESS A SPINAROONI!  Punk charges but Ryan makes the save.  Booker is out but that was insanely awesome.  My screen froze on Booker’s eyes bugging out.  You knew it was coming.  John Cena is in next and the fight is on.  He takes everyone down with basic moves and there goes Ryan to a low bridge.  Otunga and McGillicutty to a double clothesline and it’s down to Cena and Punk!

Cena charges into a corner elbow but Punk can’t get GTS.  Double clothesline puts both men down ala Hogan and Warrior in 1990.  Number 23 is…..it’s Hornswoggle.  The look on Punk’s face is hilarious.  More or less it says “no…..freaking….way.”  Punk gets up and drills Horny but goes after Cena instead.  FU TO PUNK AND HE’S OUT!  Cena is left with Horny as #24 is Tyson Kidd.  Headscissors to Kidd by Horny sets up an FU and there he goes.  Ok no he doesn’t yet as Horny wants to do it.  Horny gives him an FU and there goes Kidd.

Twenty fifth is Slater who takes a low blow from Horny and a super Stunner which actually looked pretty cool.  Double You Can’t See Me.  Tadpole Splash and there goes Slater.  It’s Kofi Kingston at 26 and this could be awesome.  Cool moment as they stare down and look at the Mania sign.  I totally buy Kofi as a threat to Cena here which is a very good sign.  Kofi beats on him a bit but it’s really a standoff.  Swagger is 27^th and takes down the weakened guys.

Vader Bomb to Cena and one for Kofi as well.  And now….dude go for the midget already.  Swagger goes after Horny but Kofi kills Jack with a cross body.  Double Boom Drop as Horny is a bridge for Kofi to jump off of.  28 is SHEAMUS.  Oh yes.  This guy is a, and I will never ever say this again, a dark horse to win this.  Sheamus cleans house and goes after Horny.  Cena saves him AGAIN and it’s another Tadpole Splash coming.  Never mind actually as Sheamus KICKS HIM IN THE HEAD to eliminate him.

Rey is #29.  We have Kofi, Cena, Swagger, Sheamus and Rey in there at the moment.  Trouble in Paradise to Sheamus but Swagger takes him down.  Rey was on the corner and Swagger tries the running belly to belly.  Rey ducks and knocks him to the apron and a 619 takes him out.  Barrett is 30 as this is FLYING by.  Wasteland to Kofi is blocked by a kick to the knee by Rey.

Cena vs. Barrett goes to Wade in the form of a Boss Man Slam.  That could so be a finisher for someone.  Maybe Ryan?  The first #31 in history is Dolph Ziggler???  Oh crap man, that could be a shock.  He hammers away on Sheamus as Barrett is in trouble.  Dolph, Sheamus, Barrett, Kofi, Cena and Rey at the moment.  Cena is in trouble and the crowd reacts BIG.

32 is DIESEL????  OH WOW!  The crowd pops HUGE.  I can’t get used to hearing him called Diesel.  Drew is 33^rd.  Nash looks kind of awesome in there.  Drew and Sheamus hammer down Diesel who is all of a sudden getting a HUGE chant!  Dude sign this guy up!  619 to Diesel which I can’t believe I just typed.

34^th is….the Miz???  Oh wait it’s Riley.  He slides in and Cena just drills him.  Striker got cut off mid sentence in a laugh.  Barrett puts  Diesel out.  ANOTHER big Diesel chant as he leaves.  Miz sits in on commentary for a bit.  Big Show is number 35 and it’s time to clear out some guys.  Show and Diesel look at each other.  Oh dang there’s some history there.  The Celts jump Show as he comes in which doesn’t go well for the UK guys.

Miz sounds like he has a cold.  There goes Ziggler at the hands of Show.  I want to know who #40 is.  36 is Big Zeke.  Uh oh.  Show puts Drew out.  Zeke puts Show down and OUT on his own!  There are four entrants left.  Who isn’t out here yet?  Rey, Zeke, Cena, Kofi, Barrett and Sheamus at the moment.  Santino is 37^th and gets a solid pop.  He goes right at Sheamus of all people.  And now he goes for Zeke who growls at him.

Santino gets knocked to the floor under the bottom rope.  Alberto is 38 and I completely forgot about him.  Ricardo does the intro!  No one else has gotten an intro but no one else is Alberto Del Rio.  Del Rio takes his sweet time and isn’t in before Orton is 39^th.  ONE MORE TO GO!  RKO to everyone and there goes Kofi.  Sheamus is out too as is Drew.  And then, it’s Cena vs. Orton.  The crowd just went SILENT and in the awesome way I mean.

They stare it down with the Mania sign between them and there’s the clock.  And it’s Kane.  Uh, kind of anti-climactic but ok.  So it’s Kane, Cena, Orton, Santino, Rey, Del Rio and I think that’s it.  I likely left someone out though.  Oh and Zeke and Barrett.  Zeke beats up Kane with relative ease after Kane cleans some house.  There goes Zeke.  Ok now we’re down to Barrett, Kane, Cena, Orton, Rey and Del Rio.  Kane is put out by Rey!  Barrett puts out Rey!  I LOVE YOU BARRETT!!!

Final four are Barrett, Orton, Cena and Del Rio.  Cena and Del Rio are in trouble but both hang on.  Randy and John (sounds weird calling it that) stare it down again to another hush.  There they go with the punches.  Both finishers miss as FU is broken up by Barrett for no apparent reason.  Maybe he’s the new Corre member?  Del Rio vs. Cena and Barrett vs. Orton at this point.

FU to Del Rio but here comes Riley again for no adequately explained reason.  MIZ ELIMINATES CENA!!!  LET THE INTERNET ERUPT!!!  Blast it not Orton again.  Is Santino still in?  Orton busts out a bunch of his basic stuff and there goes Barrett!  DEL RIO PUTS OUT ORTON TO WIN THE ROYAL RUMBLE!!!  Wait Santino is back!  COBRA!!!  THEY WOULDN’T!!!!!  Oh thank goodness Del Rio threw him out to officially end it.

Rating: A. I was wrong.  I thought this would be overblown but it felt more epic this way.  HUGE props to WWE for putting someone new in there.  That is absolutely huge for WWE as they are actually giving someone the huge push and the momentum to do it with.  He’s a glorified midcarder and he won.  This is exactly what they needed to do with this and it worked wonderfully.  Mania has matches set up for it now and we got some great surprises.  Epic Rumble although maybe just a step beneath next year.  GREAT ending though.

Overall Rating: A. This was a great show indeed.  The Divas match was the only bad thing all night and on a card with four matches you can’t argue that in the slightest.  They’re setting Mania up very early this year and that’s nothing but good.  This was a great show as WWE now has two big wins in a row.  I’m freaking pumped up for Mania now as this was great stuff indeed.  Loved it and bring on Elimination Chamber baby!

Royal Rumble 2010
Date: January 31, 2010
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

First off, love that announcing trio. Having 6 guys was WAY too much for PPVs. I’m excited for this Rumble. Yes the title matches are easy to see, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be bad. Sometimes you need predictable matches and this is one of them. The matches look good on paper and the build was all there. The Rumble winner is pretty up in the air actually. That being said the show is starting so it’s time to shut up. Actually it isn’t but you get the point.  Let’s get to it.

The video is what you would expect: a look back. Basic but well done as usual.

ECW Title: Ezekiel Jackson vs. Christian

They’ve built this up great as it finally feels like the night Christian is going down. I’m not so sure though. Jackson is a freaking scary man indeed. My stream is very choppy so this is kind of like a fast moving slide show mixed with good audio. There goes Regal after a few minutes. Striker talks too fast at times. Cole sounds sick or something. We hit the formula based stuff which is likely the best way to do this.

Since Jackson is still limited in the ring, it’s probably best to have him be carried by the far more experienced and better Christian. We’re in our second chinlock of the match already. Seriously Striker: CALM DOWN! Christian hits the jumping reverse elbow making him awesome. And then he does those stupid claps to take that away. “Hmm, I have him down and I’ve walked around in a circle so he doesn’t know where he is.

I’ll clap since that doesn’t give him a tip at all.” Jackson hits a big clothesline and we get LARIOTO from Striker. Jackson is really limited. Like Monty Brown levels of limited. I love that slingshot kick that Christian does in the corner. Why should I care about who last won the title where? No one says a word and Striker says nothing? That’s very amusing. Sleeper time. And there’s the Killswitch out of freaking nowhere for the pin. What the heck was that???

Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill big man vs. little man and the more I think about it the more I like the ending. Christian couldn’t hang with Zeke going head to head so he stopped trying to and got a quick win. I actually like that one.

Cryme Tyme both want to be in the Rumble but only one spot is available. Apparently they’ve managed to trade Khali’s spot for a kiss from Tiffany. Apparently not. Gender stereotype humor fails and Khali imitates Urkel. Shad is almost able to look eye to eye with Khali. This is stupid on so many levels. Miz comes in and Teddy, who has no authority on this show, makes the US Title match.

Rhodes sucks up to Orton and throws Ted under the bus. I’d bet on the same thing happening later with Ted,

US Title: MVP vs. The Miz

Talk about two guys that have gone in completely opposite directions. Miz used to look like a joke and is now awesome and MVP used to look awesome and now is a borderline joke. Something tells me he’s winning tonight though. MVP was US Champion what, back in 2007 and he’s still in the same place how long later? There’s a big MIZ IS AWESOME chant. Or was it AWFUL? Either one is a good sign.

MVP is all over him to start which points to Miz hanging onto the belt. Ok, we get it: MVP hung out with some chick from The View. It means nothing at all. Ah there we go. Miz is back now. He’s grown more than anyone else I’ve ever seen in the past two years. We get it also: MVP used to be in prison. Let it die already. MVP is just a failure as a face. His character is designed to be a heel but we can’t have street wise heels that look like stereotypes of course.

Ok, so MVP hits a face crusher and literally 12 seconds later the Ballin Elbow hits. Are we supposed to believe that Miz isn’t going to get up in that amount of time? Seriously? There’s a Pounce from MVP and called so much by Striker. Oh, period. Wouldn’t want to forget that.

I actually don’t know who’s going to win here which is rare in matches like these but it’s a nice plus. And Miz hits a rollup as MVP is getting back in for the pin. And that’s what he needs: wins, even by fluke, that are clean. MVP attacks him after the match and is heavily booed. Please let that be a heel turn. Cole implies it’s not.  Blast it.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all. The ending was great here as it literally came out of nowhere. Miz needs more wins like these but it gives him more and more credibility every time which is what his character needs at the moment. I haven’t seen them get a character’s development much better than his in a LONG time and I’m loving it.

Jericho and Show continue their bromance. R-Truth laughs at Jericho and says it’s every man for himself. It’s better than it sounds but it’s still dumb.

Orton is walking. Yes indeed he is. And there’s Ted to say he’s here for him. No Cody in sight though and I was right with my prediction.

Ad for Raw. I love that they feel the need to advertise a show that you likely would have had to see in order to buy this show.

Soldiers are here. Oh they’re from the National Guard.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

And the champion comes out first for no apparent reason. Sheamus is another character that has gotten a solid push from nowhere and I’m liking it. It’s working bette than Bradshaw’s when they did the same thing and I think that’s because there’s nothing of his past to compare it to. Bradshaw had nothing to go off of in the main event either but we had known him for years and he sucked. Orton gets a bit of a pop.

Please: give him a face title run. It could work. A heel vs. heel title match isn’t something I would have guessed on but it should be awesome. I’m pulling for the Irish dude just to prevent anything resembling Orton vs. HHH or Cena again. We get the big match intros too. Orton gets a straight up face pop. Sheamus gets heat but it’s mild. Still though, likely his best ever. It’s weird seeing Orton not being taller.

Sheamus is getting a bit of heat here. I like it. MASSIVE Randy chant. The fans Vince. LISTEN TO THEM. Yep, he’s wrestling life a face too. Sheamus is dominating here as he should. I’m glad they never went anywhere with the kick he gave Lawler. Orton goes for the knee which makes a lot of sense here. There has been talk of Sheamus holding the belt until Mania. I like it. We’ve begged for a new main event guy and we’ve gotten one.

Giving him a long reign is making him far more credible as a champion and main event player. It’s a brilliant move and I think it’s working. Orton STAYS ON THE KNEE! Oh blessed psychology how I love you! Sheamus works on the arm of all things. It’s different if nothing else. There’s the boo/yay thing. Fans are more or less completely behind Orton which is something Vince needs to listen to.

Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge but his knee gives out. See what psychology can do for you? Orton hits that elevated DDT that is varying degrees of awesome. They’re trying so hard to have him be heel in this and it’s failing epically. The Punt, which again is more of a freaking place kick but what do I know. Vince started the XFL so obviously he’s smarter than I am. It misses of course because that never hits on PPV for some reason.

Oh wait forgot HIAC. There’s likely a reason for that one. Rhodes runs in and attacks Sheamus but the RKO hits, meaning Sheamus keeps the belt. YES! Came out of nowhere but whatever. The fans are calling for the RKO on Rhodes but they settle for a choke instead. Ted comes down and gets that whipping. Grr and there goes the stream again! Orton more or less fires them, HOPEFULLY turning face. And Sheamus kicks Orton in the head and everyone leaves him there. Not bad at all.

Rating: B. I liked this a lot more than I should have. The psychology was all working here and it played into the match later on which is nice. The DQ ending kind of sucked as I would have preferred Sheamus to get a pin but this worked just fine I think. Legacy is FINALLY over though which is the far more important thing.

We recap Mickie vs. McCool which is by far the best build to a match I’ve seen in a women’s match in years . It’s even better than the Mark Henry vs. Viscera match. Short version: McCool and Layla were saying that Mickie was fat and it led to this. It’s a lot better than it sounds, trust me.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool

I’m actually pumped for this thing if you can believe that. Odds are it’s going to suck but whatever. The video had Beth in it which implies she’ll be here tonight. Sweet goodness change Michelle’s music. I freak can’t stand it. McCool cuts a bad promo before the match. Mickie isn’t here apparently?

And here’s Layla in the fat suit. This was stupid Friday but cute I guess and now…never mind as Mickie is here. And it’s a 20 second match as Mickie freaking murders her. Ok then. And they bring out food and poor it on the heels. Good to know.

Rating: N/A. Not sure if I like this or not. Mickie dominating is good as it ends this quickly, but it feels flat otherwise. I think I like it though. Yeah let’s go with that.

Ad for Elimination Chamber. Yeah nothing says SPECIAL gimmick match more than two in one night baby!

We recap Rey vs. Taker, which more or less is Rey won a contender’s match and then Batista is a whiny man. Something tells me that’s your ending because he has muscles and therefore he’s a good wrestler, at least in Vince’s eyes.

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio

They call this the biggest match in Rey’s career. Yep, far bigger than winning the title at Mania I’m sure. As bad as a champion that he is, that belt looks awesome on Taker’s waist. More big match intros which while they’re usually good, they kind of don’t work for Taker for some reason. This is likely to rock or suck with no real in between. This is like a wet dream for Vince: both guys are big faces so why wouldn’t this work?

Taker at 299 pounds sounds odd for some reason. Rey gets freaking launched to the floor but lands on his feet. Nice indeed. Taker has done maybe two moves and he’s put Rey on the floor twice. This is all Taker so far. Thankfully the 619 misses. Taker goes for the Tombstone but Rey uses the ancient Chinese principle of kicking his feet to get out of it. Taker of course messes up his knee because that’s all he can do in most matches anymore.

His hip is in a lot of legit pain at this point so it’s likely not a ton of acting. We get the Asai Moonsault for the Japanese fans out there. Taker’s chest looks the same as Michelle’s used to look like. I wonder if they got them done in the same place? They seem like they’re killing time, which screams BATISTA to me.

Surprisingly enough though it doesn’t come as Taker just more or less casually hits the Last Ride after countering a flippy. Where’s Norcal when I need him? Oh yeah at a bar with muscle guys.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t thrilled here at all. The only good thing was that there was a clean ending which was my main concern here. It’s two more old guys in the main event but at least they’re popular so that’s all I can ask for. Not awful, but underwhelming.

Shawn and Kane talk. HHH and Shawn talk. Greatness personified.

I freaking LOVE that video package about the numbers.

Royal Rumble

Dolph Ziggler is first and Evan Bourne is second. Ok then. And the Zig Zag hits a few minutes in. He pulls a Davey Boy Smith though and doesn’t make sure he goes over. The Shooting Star hits and Punk is third. With the roll he’s been on lately he needs a LONG run here. He starts off hot by throwing out both guys and has time to cut a promo. The heat is there, the look is there and the ability is there.

He has to job to the old guys though right? Number four is one of Cryme Tyme. Oh it’s JTG. Please….make it quick. Hey I got my wish! It lasted just a few seconds as we get our second promo of the night. I love Punk in case I didn’t make that clear. Fifth is Khali. Don’t you freaking put Punk out to this imbecile! You know they will though. Please, sacrifice Serena or something. I beg of you Vince, use your freaking brain.

Nope, Punk gets his the beating. Oh I get it: Khali is a “fun” character so that makes the idiocy ok. He gets the vice but it doesn’t last long enough and…Beth Phoenix is 6th? Well ok then. It’s different if nothing else. Beth gets picked up and placed on the apron where she kisses Khali before ELIMINATING HIM!! Punk hits her with the GTS after a brief skirmish. Didn’t see this coming. Seventh is Zach Ryder. This is odd indeed.

Beth is odd as we get some awesome music from Ryder. Punk tries to recruit Ryder and then hits him to MASSIVE face pops. He’s alone again as this is awesome. It’s another promo. Kane or Show will put him out soon enough. He says he’s better than whoever is next and you can smell the elimination coming from here. And it’s HHH. Bye Punk. Have fun in the belly of HHH’s ego. His intro takes the better part of ever so at least he’s consistent.

Hey Punk actually lasts until McIntyre is 9th. And HHH puts out Punk to get his ego up again. Yep, can’t have these young talented and over guys taking the place of guys like HHH. HHH is called the future of the company. That’s a scary thought. DiBiase is 10th. We’re 1/3 of the way through this. Oh great. Morrison is 11th. Nothing of note is happening at all. McIntyre takes Starship Pain and here’s HHH to take his head off anyway.

Kane is 12th, To recap it’s HHH, Kane, DiBiase, Morrison and McIntyre in there at the moment. The IC Title boys take a double chokeslam and it’s all Kane meaning he’ll be out soon or last a long time. And HHH saves DiBiase. Ok then. I guess the whole end your career thing is forgives. Cody Rhodes comes up on the monitor and Striker says it must be Rhodes. What would we do without you Matty? Legacy dominates…kind of. Morrison is incredibly acrobatic.

Rhodes underrated in the ring. Striker says he’s the seed of the Dream. BAD IMAGE MAN! Kane of course is moving and Cole can’t tell McIntyre and HHH apart. MVP is 14th. Miz jumps him in the aisle and blasts him with the belt. Know what would be nice now? A shot of the ring. Oh there it is. Morrison hits a SICK springboard spinkick to the head of McIntyre. MVP is taken out as I’m pretty sure HHH is going to win here.

My guess is Shawn vs. HHH somewhere down the line because of Shawn’s incessant ego. Carlito is 15th and apparently he’s interesting. Yeah that’s nonsense if I’ve ever heard it. He hits a nice springboard reverse elbow to Legacy. That was nice. MVP will likely run in and attack Miz later. Nothing predictable at all there. HHH takes the Backstabber as do a lot of people. Holy crap he’s dominating. Sixteenth is Miz. Amazingly MVP doesn’t jump him. That’ll be next I guess.

The Skull Crushing Finale hits Carlito. The fans pop like a cherry pie for Miz vs. Morrison and here’s MVP to put himself and Miz out. Legacy has HHH in trouble and of course he doesn’t go out. Carlito hangs onto the rope and stays in. Number 17 is Matt Hardy to a huge pop. This crowd is awesome. To continue the trend he dominates and hits a bunch of people before Kane puts him out and Kane is out by HHH.

You really can see it coming. I hope I need glasses. Spinebusters all around. A hot crowd pops for him so that validates this I suppose. HBK is 18th and I think I feel a showdown of 1990 proportions coming. Rhodes and Carlito and DiBiase are gone. Ok we have Shawn, McIntyre, Morrison and HHH in there at the moment. Ok take out Morrison and the showdown is pretty clear.

Shawn has the second most eliminations in Rumble history apparently. Yep it’s showdown time and there’s the clock. It’ll be a jobber and…never mind it’s Cena. Vince the Survivor Series bombed with this main event so why wouldn’t this do it too? And of course he beats up DX. A double You Can’t See Me is booed to an extent. HHH stops an FU and takes a Pedigree AND HHH IS SUPERKICKED OUT OF THE MATCH! I am STUNNED as all goodness. TAKE THAT MELTZER!!!

Shelton is in now and I’m switching my bet to Cena. Shawn has put Shelton out like three years in a row or something. This is his eighth consecutive Rumble. Wow I wouldn’t have guessed that one. Cena ends Shawn’s streak and puts out Shelton. Holy Mania rematch Batman. Yoshi Tatsu is 21st. I like this guy for some reason. Of course Striker has a dumb name for him: the Poison Fist of the Pacific Rim. Cena dumps him in a few seconds and we’re back to Shawn and Cena.

Nothing overdone about that AT ALL is there? Ok Atlanta is allowed to do the WOOs. Big Show is 22nd. Show almost goes out but saves himself. Cena goes for an FU but it misses. Shawn has to skin the cat (what a name I tell you) because Chin Music misses. Mark Henry is 23rd. Well they’re having some big names in there at least. I still can’t get over HHH being out already. It’s a curveball if nothing else. Henry goes for a slam can can’t get it.

Why do I have a feeling he’s not the world’s strongest man? He gets the slam a bit later but then almost gets an FU. Masters is number 24. Have to have some jobbers I guess. He press slams Shawn and of course doesn’t throw him out. Instead he puts the Masterlock on Show and he gets tossed for it. Henry and Show go at it again as we have a clock. It’s R-Truth….AND HE PUTS OUT SHOW AND HENRY.

I guess there is a youth movement. It’s Truth, Cena and Michaels here. He shows his TNA connection by hitting Cena with the Stroke. The fans are chanting boring. This hasn’t been bad at all. Swagger is 26th as Norcal pops. This is his first Rumble. I wouldn’t have guessed that. Vader Bombs all around. NO! Stream went out! Never mind it’s back!

Kofi is 27th. There goes Truth. Jericho is 28th. Kofi put out Truth in case you were wondering. He follows that up by kicking the heck out of Shawn and then gets thrown by Cena. All three are down and here’s 29. HOLY CRAP IT’S EDGE! Ok it’s not really shocking but still cool moment. Oh yeah he’s a face. Just like he should be. Spears all around and we might not have a surefire winner now.

There goes Jericho and Edge is domination. Sweet the Edgecution is back! Fans are WAY into this. Shame Batista will be 30th. It would have made sense to just have it be Edge in at 30. Ok final four are Cena, Shawn, Batissta and Edge. Naturally Batista is dominating. Anyone of these guys could win. Edge spears him down and Cena FUs Edge so everyone is down. Shawn nips up to another great pop. That’s one of those moves that just plain works.

Shawn is dominating here and Striker screws up again by saying that Edge has had no vigor. Shawn is dominating here and this is exciting me. Cena gets kicked and si does Big Dave. Edge clotheslines Shawn to the apron and then gets superkicked back in. DAVE PUTS SHAWN OUT! The crowd just goes dead silent. That came from nowhere. This is wide open at this point. WOW I haven’t heard a crowd die like that ever.

That…might not have been what was supposed to happen. He goes nuts an goes back in, beating up referees. Could this be a Shawn HEEL TURN??? I certainly freaking hope so. More referees come down as Shawn looks freaking crushed. Striker says this is heartbreaking (no pun intended I’m sure) as he says Shawn has never achieved this. If he means beating Taker he’s an idiot. He’s also never achieved a good buyrate but we’ll ignore that.

Ok so it’s Edge, Batista and Cena. Cena reverses the Batista Bomb and Batista reverses the FU and there goes Batista! This would suggest Edge winning but I’m not so sure. He sets for the spear with those great visuals of his and it misses of course. Cena goes for a clothesline and EDGE WINS IT! YEAH!

Take that people screaming this was going to be predicable! Love that ending, even though it’s the same thing they did with Cena but not as exciting/sweet. This is what we needed too: a FRESH face that is going to get some POPS. Great move all around and a great Rumble match.

Rating: A. Very solid Rumble here. Edge winning was a very pleasant shock and I liked it a lot. They had the star power in there tonight and no Santino or Duggan or jokes like that who are just going to waste time and spots. The formula works great when it clicks and this was no exception. I was bored until HHH got dumped but it wasn’t awful before that. Once he’s gone though, it’s straight through the roof. Very good Rumble and likely in the top five ever of them.

Overall Rating: A-. I was going back and forth between B- and C+. The whole show was indeed nothing great, but there was nothing that bad really. The right people won, for the most part they won clean, Orton is a face…I think, Shawn is snapping, Legacy is OVER, and Edge is back as a top level face.

This was a very good show and if you want to say it was predictable, let me know so I can laugh at you. Fun show and worth checking out, just don’t expect a classic. Edited: what the heck am I thinking? This show was great. A-.

And so ends the history of the Royal Rumble.  I had fun doing this and I think I’ll be doing one off reviews now as it’s much easier and I can look around and have more fun and diversity with it. Anyway, thanks for reading. I appreciate it. I’ll be doing another of these for Wrestlemania so stay tuned.  Or logged or whatever the right term is.

Who do you all think will win the Rumble this year?

Smackdown
Date: January 28, 2011
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Matt Striker

It’s the final show before we hit the Rumble so I think I know what we’re going to be talking about.  Tonight’s main event is Rated RKO facing Miz/Ziggler.  Also I’d bet one a lot more from the Corre as on Monday the main focus was on Nexus so therefore the same thing needs to be done here.  Ok so it’s not that bad but it does happen a good bit.  Anyway, let’s get to it.

Oh and before I forget, I won’t be here next week for NXT or Smackdown.  I’ll be back the following week for at least Smackdown and maybe NXT but I’m not sure.  Have fun without me.

The opening is about Corre and their interaction with Teddy.  A lot of this is about how Corre might have been the guys that did it.  There’s a clock theme to it which doesn’t seem accurate by comparison to what I remember from last week, as in the timing is off from when it actually happened.  We also see Gabriel beating Edge.

No theme song again.  Instead we get to hear Vickie’s voice to open the show properly.  Teddy can’t be here tonight so she’s in charge.  She gets cut off by Orton’s music and the pop is still solid.  I love these times where people go back and forth from show to show.  Vickie cuts the music off with an EXCUSE ME.  I guess she didn’t like what the voices had to say.

Randy says he doesn’t know Vickie very well, “so you’ll have to excuse me”, for what he’s going to do to her boyfriend later tonight.  That was clever.  Miz will have to excuse Orton for taking the WWE Championship from him as well.  He puts his arm around Vickie and says by the way, nice hair.  This is oddly funny for some reason.  There is no excuse for Vickie though.  Orton’s delivery here was some of his best in awhile and I was liking it.

Here comes Dolph to stand up for Vickie.  Well at least he’s not standing up for WWE.  Dolph demands respect for himself and Vickie because after Sunday he’ll be World Champion.  Orton says around here you have to earn it, and there’s an RKO for Dolph.  This is going to sound odd, but I think the blue on Smackdown agrees with Randy.  His skin is so orange that the red on Raw makes him look weird.  As odd as it sounds I’m being serious when I say that.

Laycool vs. Kaitlyn/Kelly Kelly

Striker sings Laycool’s song which is rather disturbing.  The non-Flawless ones jump Laycool during their entrance and the beating is on in the aisle.  Is this Kaitlyn’s non-NXT debut?  She starts with Michelle and is clearly green.  Layla distracts Kaitlyn though and Michelle kicks Kaitlyn’s head off to end this at 43 seconds.  AWESOME kick and if that hadn’t ended it there was no way I would have believed it.  The replay makes it look even better as that kick was spot on.

Drew McIntyre vs. JTG

Kelly hangs out at ringside for this one.  Cole wants to know how she can criticize Drew for being aggressive when she jumped Laycool pre-match.  That’s a totally fair question but we get no answer of course.  That face pop for Drew is still slowly growing but it’s growing nonetheless.  They start off kind of staring at each other until JTG goes after him, sending him to the floor.

Drew suddenly realizes he’s fighting a jobber and starts mauling him.  Back into the ring and it’s all Drew who hits three neckbreakers in a row for two.  Since that didn’t work he switches to hammering away in the corner with clotheslines.  Drew even channels his inner John Cena and throws a decent dropkick for one.  JTG gets some jobber offense in until Drew runs him over.

After some more pounding we hit the ground for more pounding.  He adds in that modified crossface chickenwing that Sheamus has also been using recently.  Must be a UK thing.  Another neckbreaker attempt is countered into a backslide for two.  JTG gets a bit of momentum going and tries another backslide.  Drew casually rolls through it and grabs the Futureshock to end it at 4:35.  That was a nice counter to end it.

Rating: C+. Just an extended squash here but they let Drew show off a bit.  JTG is fine in this jobber role he has.  Every generation has had its share of jobbers but I guess this one has their own theme music.  They put on a fairly decent match here all things considered though and it worked fine.

Drew plays nice this week and leaves just as Kelly gets in the ring, apparently not seeing her or looking up as he leaves since the big screen shows her in the ring.  She looks at him and seems uncertain.

We recap Cody vs. Rey last week where Cody got his nose broken.  The point of this is that Cody exposed the knee brace that hit him in the face and caused his injury.

In the back Cody is interviewed and won’t turn to face the camera.  Cody has it on good authority that Rey didn’t even want to win that match.  He has a broken nose and will need extensive reconstructive surgery and is out of the Rumble.  Cody says that it’s what you do that defines you and he’s going to keep swinging.  He sounds like he’s almost crying.  A kid told him he wasn’t dashing anymore, and the kid is right.  He can’t talk anymore.  This gave me flashes of the Elephant Man, which will make perfect sense if you’ve seen the movie.

Some overly happy interviewer talks to Edge.  Edge says he doesn’t want to talk about the tag match but rather Corre.  He even remembers all of their names, including DJ Gabriel.  I never thought I’d hear that name again.  The only thing he’s going to say about the tag match is he’s going to spear Ziggler.

Del Rio says hi to Tarver who is suddenly one of the more interesting mysteries.  Why is he always standing around?

Here’s Alberto who has promised a Rumble exhibition.  Even though he has very little chance to win the Rumble, they’re making me kind of believe it’s possible, which means they’re doing the right thing.  Apparently he has 39 fighters from all over the world ready for an exhibition.  Every 30 seconds another will come out, meaning this should take about 20 minutes.

The first guy is Seth Allen who according to Striker is a former Western States Heritage Champion.  This is like a challenge mode on SvR or something.  And he’s gone.  Next up is Mike Stevens, a former Brass Knuckles Champion.  They’re speeding up the clock here.  He can’t get him out in thirty seconds so here’s Kane as a penalty.  Alberto gets the corner enziguri but charges into a chokeslam position.

Kofi comes out as I guess the clock thing is still going on.  Why did Kofi bring the belt with him?  Either way he dumps both guys out and stands tall.  The villains surround Kofi so Rey comes down to even the odds.  You know, because it’s not like he would want a guy the caliber of the Intercontinental Champion to get beaten down two days before the Rumble or anything like that right?  You know come to think of it, scratch that.  As annoying as Rey can be, it’s nice to see a pure face once in awhile instead of someone that is a face when it suits them.  Anyway, Vickie comes out to make the obvious tag match.

Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio vs. Alberto Del Rio/Kane

Well you knew there would be a tag match somewhere since it’s Smackdown.  Back from a break and there’s the bell.  Kane and Kofi start us off which could be an interesting midcard feud.  The power takes over and it’s off to Alberto.  Off to Rey now as Kofi has taken over.  Nice double teaming allows Kofi to get in a jumping elbow before he leaves.  Rey looks different for some reason.

We start talking about Cody and Striker has sympathy for him.  Josh of course is the voice of reason.  Oh joy: it’s Rey vs. Kane.  619 is teased but Kane hits the floor instead.  Back off to Kofi as Alberto gets in Kane’s face.  The good guys get a baseball slide to send Alberto into Kane and then a dive and seated senton put Alberto and Kane down respectively.

Kofi sets for the cross body back in the ring but Alberto shoves him off.  They double team Kofi even though I’m pretty sure Striker said Rey was the legal man.  Kane drops a leg for two.  Kofi tries to fight him off but runs into a side slam to take him down.  Alberto is back in and they work on the back for awhile.  Kane back in as the heels are tagging very fast.

Kane catches the foot of Kofi who has to now hop over to his corner.  In something that felt anti-climactic in a weird way, Kingston is able to get the tag and here comes Rey with a seated senton off the top to Kane.  That only gets two though so we reset a bit.  Rey tries a springboard move but Kane kicks him in the face and to the floor.  He also kicked us into a break.

Back with Alberto hitting a back elbow to Rey for two.  Now we hit the chinlock and Rey is in trouble.  Sunset flip by Del Rio is countered into that kick that Rey has been using recently to put both guys down.  Del Rio doesn’t tag but beats on Rey come more.  Kane back in as they’re tagging so often I don’t even notice it anymore.  Granted that could mean I’m getting sucked into the match which is possible as this has been good.

Kane gets Rey up in a powerslam position but Rey is able to spin out into a DDT to send both guys down again.  Tag on both sides and Kofi comes in with the springboard cross body.  Del Rio gets a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two out of nowhere.  He goes to tag but there’s no Kane due to a kick from Kofi a second earlier.  Top rope cross body gets two as Kane saves.

Del Rio gets in Kane’s face, yelling at him in Spanish.  The amusing thing is that Kane, being born in Spain, might have a better grasp of the language than Del Rio.  Alberto shoves Kane, who responds in my favorite way: KICKING HIM IN THE FACE!  Sorry that has to be caps.  There’s something so awesome to me about kicking a guy in the face to end an argument.  That could solve so many real world problems.  Anyway the 619 sets up the Trouble in Paradise to end this long match at 12:23 shown of 15:53.

Rating: B+. Probably a bit high but I got into this.  It’s a long formula match and that’s usually the best kind of tag match.  I always get a kick out of throwing two heel s and two faces together and seeing what happens.  They shifted momentum a lot here and it worked rather well I thought.  Fun match.

We get a clip from Raw of Edge vs. Miz which set up the tag match later.

Big Show comes out and seems to be in a good mood.  He talks about how when you’re 7’0, 440lbs and a former WWE Champion, sometimes people want to use you to make a statement.  Naturally he’s talking about the Corre and we get a clip of them beating him down.  That did two things: made him angry and reminded him of what it’s going to be like in the Rumble.  As he talks about never having won a Rumble, here they come.

The shirts aren’t working for me as they look like they’re in beauty pageants.  Show asks if this is how it’s going to be, always 4-1.  He challenges any of them one on one but seems to want Jackson the most.  Slater comes in from behind and we have a bell and a referee!

Heath Slater vs. Big Show

Cole: “This shows you how much heart this kid Slater had.”  Josh: “Or that he’s an idiot.”  I love listening to those two.  Slater goes for the knee but Show chops him down from his knee.  Striker points out that all four members of Corre are from different continents.  There’s a Captain Planet joke in there somewhere.  Chokeslam ends it in about 1:15.  Nothing to see here.

Show goes after the other members but Jackson takes him down with a single clothesline.  The beatdown is on but the Smackdown locker room (read as JTG, Masters, Santino, Kozlov and Bryan.  In other words, a jobber, a jobber to the stars, the tag champions that are more commonly associated with Raw, and a Raw champion.) comes out to clear the ring.

All About the Numbers and a rundown of the card eat up five minutes.

Rated RKO vs. The Miz/Dolph Ziggler

Miz is out first and wants to talk about…The Truman Doctrine?  Yeah, he talks about a foreign policy doctrine from the late 40s.  What does this have to do with anything?  Nothing according to Miz.  It doesn’t matter at all.  It also doesn’t matter what Randy Orton does; the Miz is leaving the Rumble with the WWE Championship.  Another decent Miz promo.

Orton vs. Ziggler to start us off.  Basic back and forth until Orton takes over with a clothesline.  He pauses to chase Miz though and Ziggler gets the advantage.  Off to Edge who puts his head down and takes an X-Factor for two.  Over to Miz who gets an assist from Riley to take over.  Randy gets in a quick shot though and gets into RKO position!  He stares down Miz…and we take a break?

Apparently there were technical difficulties and that wasn’t a scheduled break.  That explains a lot.  Either way, Ziggler pulled Randy out before it could hit.  Back with Miz holding a chinlock on Orton.  Randy tries to fight back but Miz gets a nice combination (has Orton in a reverse DDT position and drops his back down like a reverse Facecrusher before hitting a neckbreaker.  Kind of like a modified Reality Check).

Corner clothesline is attempted but Orton lands one of his own.  Off to Edge and Ziggler as we’re getting close to the ending it seems.  Edge sets for the spear on Ziggler but Riley interferes so he has to settle for the Edge-O-Matic for two.  Zig Zag is blocked and there’s the spear for the clean pin at 7:50 shown of 11:20.

Rating: C. Basic main event tag match here but I was surprised as to hoe it ended.  It’s not bad but I couldn’t get into this one.  The ending really didn’t work for me as it takes away a lot of the drama for Sunday, like can Edge pin Dolph?  Well yeah apparently he can.  Granted I don’t think many people are buying the show to see that match so I can pretty easily forgive them there.  That being said, not a great match at all but still decent enough.

Post match Vickie bans the spear and says that if he uses it on Sunday, Ziggler is champion.  This earns Dolph three straight spears to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Much better show this week.  They covered a lot more stuff here and it worked better than the previous one.  This built up the title match and the Rumble at the same time which is good.  There was no point to just doing the Rumble as we got that on Raw so they focused on both world titles here.  Couple that with some decent wrestling and it’s definitely a good show.

Results

Laycool b. Kaitlyn/Kelly Kelly – Big Boot to Kaitlyn

Drew McIntyre b. JTG – Futureshock

Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio b. Alberto Del Rio/Kane – Trouble in Paradise to Del Rio

Big Show b. Heath Slater – Chokeslam

Rated RKO b. Dolph Ziggler/The Miz – Spear to Ziggler

Royal Rumble 2009
Date: January 25, 2009
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 16,685
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Matt Striker, Todd Grisham

There are really no differences at all between this and what you see today other than a few face and heel changes. Everyone is here for the most part other than Christian I think. Yeah there’s just not much that’s changed since then other than DX reuniting. We have five matches tonight, one of which is the new Smackdown Champion Jeff Hardy in his first title defense against Edge, although someone has been trying to get him lately.

Also we have Cena defending against JBL in the token title match of the year. Other than that it’s just the Rumble which more or less was the most predictable match in history as all of one person was mentioned at all in the buildup to it. That being said, let’s get to it.

The opening video is the standard thing of all the Rumble winners and all of the logos but it’s cut off by Orton’s music and clips of him being a bastard to the insanely hot Stephanie. Vince gets kicked in the head to stun the crowd. Yeah, they’re not making it obvious at all who was going to win here.

The slow motion replay of the kick shows that it’s INSANE. There’s no pyro for the opening as it’s all serious and stuff. In other words, the fans get cheated to a special part of the show for Vince. Oh never mind there’s the pyro. Still kind of stupid though.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. Jack Swagger

Jack was the undefeated rookie here, having won the title two and a half weeks ago. This is the mostly pointless rematch. Matt gets a great pop and I wonder why he’s never been pushed harder than he has been yet. It’s a shame that Swagger is being depushed, but to be fair tonight for the Little People Court Raw he had a good match with Cena so maybe the push is back. He has no pyro yet so that sucks. We even get the big match intros here.

Since it’s 2009, Swagger is a cowardly heel at the beginning. Hardy brawls for the most part as Striker points out that he can’t out wrestle him so why try? That’s a great point at least. We get a replay of a great right hand from Matt. That was sweet. Hardy is doing really well so you know how it’s going to end in case it wasn’t clear yet. Swagger works on the arm which is the one he uses for the Twist of Fate. I know because Striker told me.

See why he’s the best in the world today? Swagger is working the shoulder really hard here and uses some unique stuff, including a boot to the shoulder. That’s something I’ve seen a few times but rarely enough that it’s effective. I’m not sure if I like or dislike the big 2 signs in the front row for counts. They always disappear after the first match so I’m guessing someone takes it from them or they get tired of it.

Striker goes way too insane by saying who the last North Carolinian to win a world title in Detroit (Steamboat in 87). That’s saying a lot. This is a good match with a lot of close calls. They’re getting some time too so that helps a lot. Hardy goes into the post as it was already hurt. Swagger hits the powerbomb for the pin to retain and let us hear his awesome music. Hardy sits on the steps with his head in his hands. Remember that for later.

Rating: B. I really liked this. It was a decent length of about ten minutes and had a ton of close calls and near falls. The arm stuff was good and it played into the ending to give it some psychology. That gives it most of what makes a great match so this is easily solid for an opener.

Orton is here and no one is talking to him. They’re making this seem like the big deal that it’s supposed to be.

Raw Women’s Title: Melina vs. Beth Phoenix

Melina is gyrating like there’s no tomorrow and it’s working very well. Beth is with Santino here but it’s getting close to the end. Santina would be debuting soon enough to suck the life out of everything again. Beth is just freaking gorgeous. I love that backflip she does to get into the ring. Santino gets a massive chant, proving that no one cares about the women and care about comedy.

Thank you Vince for crippling wrestling and making the comedy more important. Beth very clearly calls a spot to Melina and then whips her in. Beth shows off her power by lifting Melina up with one arm. That’s just freaking scary. Beth’s thong is sticking out which is of course awesome. She gets a leg lock on Melina that’s in so deep that her foot is touching her head. That can’t feel good. Beth actually pulls the leg back to ram it into her head. FREAKING OW MAN!

They botch the heck out of something as Melina is trying to come back. Melina hits an INSANE move where she spins around Beth’s side to get the rollup for the title. That was awesome looking.

Rating: C-. There were far too many botches in there but the submission thing and the ending were both cool. It was your standard Diva match so that’s not saying a lot. Melina’s selling of her back was great here though and it helped the match a lot. Not bad, but still far from great due to the sloppiness. They had a submission match soon after this.

We recap the JBL vs. Cena feud, which is mainly about the JBL and HBK feud over the money or whatever. It was stupid and one of those “real” angles that never work for me. It’s like saying Shawn makes no money from wrestling or anything like that which is just ridiculous. Being conservative, let’s say Shawn makes a quarter million a year. That’s FAR more than enough to live a decent life, but he needs to be sold to JBL to make ends meet?

Shawn more or less lays down for JBL to get the pin. The problem that plagued this at the end was that it ended way too fast. It should have been at Mania instead of No Way Out. To be fair though, that wound up being the wrong choice as Shawn and JBL did what they should have done at Mania.

We see JBL and Shawn in the back and JBL says that if he wins tonight, Shawn is a free man and paid in full and can be in the Rumble. JBL leaves and Shawn looks in a mirror for awhile and then turns around to have Taker staring down at him. He says that sometimes you have to go through a lot to get to Heaven. Yeah they did the right thing.

Ad for Mania.

Raw World Title: JBL vs. John Cena

Cena was kind of casually mentioned in the package. Until the Taker cameo, I would have believed a title change here. The crowd is split on Cena as always. I would have actually believed them going with JBL vs. Shawn, but Taker switched me to reality. The idea here is that Cena is off his game because he has to keep his eye on Shawn. For instance, they’re on the floor and Cena ducks a clothesline but Shawn is in front of him and Cena gets ready to duck the superkick and JBL gets a shot in.

Never mind that the kick would have cost JBL the match but whatever. JBL had lost a bunch of weight at this point and actually looked like he was in very good shape. He lost probably 40 or 50 pounds and actually had a stomach. Shawn is more or less stoic on the floor. There’s a Ram Jam sign in the crowd, which is the finisher of the main character in The Wrestler.

We cut to a shot of Shawn about once every 30 seconds as Cena is more or less a pawn in this, which is ok I guess as this was just another title match for him. Cena has the STFU but due to Shawn standing there he gets nervous and JBL can get out. The Clothesline hits but it just gets two. There goes the referee and we have a bad looking double clothesline spot. Oddly enough we can see the ECW announce table over Shawn’s shoulder and there’s no Todd Grisham. That’s most odd.

Shawn gets in the ring and starts tuning up the band. He kicks Cena and JBL begins his second world title reign. Yeah I don’t buy that either. Oh of course he kicks JBL. Ok he kicks Cena too. He lays JBL on top of Cena as Cole says he doesn’t get it. That might be because Cole is freaking stupid. Yeah it must be. Shawn leaves and shakes his head as Cole tries to figure out the complexity of this.

Have fun Mikey boy as it doesn’t exist. Another referee comes out and we get two. Both guys are out as Cena kicks out so it looks like he’s spooning JBL. DANG that first referee has been out for a long time. He got ran into not freaking shot. Cena gets an easy FU for the pin. Oddly enough it has no name here and was called his move by Lawler in the replay.

Rating: C. Usual stuff from these two with the focus on JBL and Shawn like it should have been. That’s ok here though as it set up the big blowoff with them next month. Like I said Cena was more or less a pawn here and that’s all he should have been. This got JBL and Shawn much further along and it worked well. The match wasn’t that good but it rarely was with these two so what are you going to do.

Buy Legends of Wrestlemania and mess with history.

We recap Edge vs. Hardy which was the result of the Stairwell “Atrocity”. Basically, it seemed like someone wanted to hurt Jeff. There was that, plus him and his girlfriend being run off the road, and him having his face burned by pyro. I went to a house show a few weeks after that and he didn’t appear because of it. I’ve never seen so many kids look so sad. Anyway, Edge denied everything as he was the obvious most likely suspect. This is Jeff’s first title defense.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Jeff Hardy

Wow. Back in 2000 or 2001 who would have thought that would be realistic? Jeff is WAY over. The celebration for him winning the title was absolutely perfect. My goodness I want to freaking shoot Vickie. Oh she’s Edge’s wife at the moment. It’s no DQ now also. Edge is flanked by Chavo. Edge gets speared as the bell rings, which is stupid as he didn’t need to since there’s no DQ. The WE WANT CHRISTIAN chant starts in about 10 seconds.

Christian would debut again in 16 days and he was already done with TNA and had made it known that he was coming back to WWE. You know the more I watch these shows, the more spots I see called by guys. I wonder if that’s just because I’ve seen a lot or if it’s because it’s becoming more of an issue with these young guys. After Jeff dominates for a bit, Chavo’s interference gives Edge the advantage.

Now we get some stupid hockey jokes after Edge slams his head into the table three times. Geez there’s another called spot. And now it’s weapons time as Edge brings in a chair which doesn’t work. While both are on the apron, Jeff hits a Twist of Fate which pretty much sucked. And there’s the ladder because Jeff is the Sabu of the WWE. Chavo makes a save but gets thrown off and jumped on. Jeff jumps off onto Edge.

I use the term jump loosely as he more or less falls and the splash turns into a headbutt. It looked ok but sloppy. Passable at least. This is the referee with the hitch in his count which is so annoying. Edge counters the Twist of Fate into a DDT which impresses JR. Why? It’s not like that move has never been countered before. That’s why it never worked as a big time move. Think of the leg drop or the Sharpshooter or the Stunner in the earlier days of it or the tombstone.

When one of those connected, it was OVER. Jeff and Edge never had one of those, which is what makes them look weak. Vickie comes out and breaks up the pin off the Swanton. Here’s Matt with a chair and you can feel it coming. The crowd just goes silent over the chair shot and the look from Matt is GREAT.

This was an awesome moment with Edge looking back and forth with an awesome what the heck just happened look on his face. The complete lack of commentary here helps a lot. Matt walks away stoically. This would lead to their two match series that sucked because they didn’t go anywhere near as insane as they could have.

Rating: B-. Not bad but not great here. They had their standard good match that went about 20 minutes. That’s all you need really at the end of the day. The real story here was of course Matt vs. Jeff which is fine as it was a great story that the matches couldn’t live up to. They went fine though here and that’s fine.

Ad for No Way Out, which is now just called Elimination Chamber.

Orton says he’s not worried about Vince. This was the start of the STUPID mental disorder or whatever it was. That could have worked if he never said he didn’t have it or whatever but the whole thing was just stupid. Jericho shows up and says good job on kicking Vince in the head.

We get a recap of all of the Rumbles which never gets old. This is the really cool one with the following stats, accurate as of coming into the 09 Rumble:

22 winners (in 21 matches, but remember Luger and Hart were co-winners)

598 competitors (this is odd as there was one match with only 20 entrants and I don’t think there are enough to knock out twelve people over the years, unless they’re counting all the times where a guy gets beaten up on the way to the ring)

36 people that Austin eliminated, a record that Kane will likely break someday.

11 people that Kane threw out in 2001 which is insane

11 consecutive Rumbles for Kane, which is awesome

1 woman ever for Chyna

62 minutes 12 seconds which is the official record I guess, even though if you listen to the commentary for the 92 Rumble Flair was in for about 70 or so, which was false.

2 seconds that the Warlord lasted.

3 times that Austin won, which is also a record

1, the number with the same amount of winners as number 30, which is insane when you think about it. Note that in the video for this they only show Shawn when talking about the number one spot.

27, which has had 4 winners (Studd, Yoko, Hart, Austin in 2001)

70 which is the percent that since 1993 that the winner has won the world title at Mania.

This was an AWESOME package that got me completely in the mood for a great Rumble.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals this year. Rey has number one and Morrison number two. If they had any idea what kind of a classic they would have in the fall they would be amazed. Rey’s mask makes him looking like a member of the Klan. Ross and Lawler are doing the commentary which just makes this feel right. One thing I like that they’ve got going here is they have a big Mania 25 logo in the corner of the arena and everyone keeps pointing to it.

Miz and Morrison are of course tag champions here. Rey does an awesome spinning move around John to get to an arm drag. Number three is Carlito. He’s a face here as he’s part of the Smackdown tag champions which would be unified at Mania. Oh no wait it was before Mania because we had to have a Kid Rock medley. MVP, just having turned face is 4th. Khali is 5th as not a lot is happening. He of course dominates the whole thing and chops the heck out of them all.

I hated the match he had with Rey when Rey was world champion. It completely killed Rey’s credibility for months. Kozlov, still undefeated and with a decent amount of heat is 6th. He drops Khali in about 5 seconds. MVP and Carlito are both out now so it’s Rey, Morrison who has been hiding and Vlady. It’s HHH at number 7 to a roar. After a facebuster, HHH throws him out with ease. Orton is 8th and it’s on.

The clock came up very fast for him as I’m assuming HHH was afraid of being in there with two good workers like Morrison and Rey. Morrison gets a 619 and Cryme Tyme come out and flip a coin to decide who gets in and it’s JTG. The clock is going WAY too fast here as DiBiase is 10th. Morrison and JTG both go over but hang on and kick at each other in a cool looking spot and then DiBiase and Rey do it and then HHH and Orton do it. That’s either cool or stupid.

Jericho is 11th. Well no one can say that they’re sticking with small stars in the opening. Despite the star power, not a lot of interesting anything is going on, mainly because it’s so clear Orton will win. Mike Knox and the beard of awesome is 12th. Knox would somehow manage to get into the Elimination Chamber next month which blew my mind and sucked at the same time. Miz is 13th.

He was about to start making fun of Cena and becoming the awesome character that he still is to this day. Morrison takes a sweet RKO and then so does Miz and JTG. He gets stopped by a Pedigree as HHH throws out Morrison and Miz while Finlay is 14th.

In a SWEET spot, Rey goes over the top to the floor but walks on Miz and Morrison to stay alive. That was awesome. How in the world are we almost halfway done with this? Rhodes is number 15. Rey gets a springboard and Orton takes him down with an RKO. The lights go out and Taker is sixteenth. Taker is on one side of the ring and everyone else is on the other. He beats them all up and throws out JTG with ease of course.

The crowd is way into him. That’s why he’s still getting pushed. Gold freaking Dust is 17th. WHY does he still have a job? He has no gimmick and is slipping in the ring. He and Cody have a showdown and Goldie beats him up. This is being written on December 23rd. My wish for Cody: that he makes 1/10 of the impact Goldust made. He’s got a long way to go. Rhodes puts out Rhodes and Orton is very proud. Punk gets number 18.

That pop doesn’t exist according to Vince as he deserves to be jobbed to Cena in less than two minutes. He won the IC Title about two weeks prior to this and the Triple Crown in less than a year. That’s amazing. Vince disagrees apparently. Yeah I’m a Punk mark, get over it. He hits GTS on HHH which surprises me. Henry, still a heel and not yet the Kool Aid Man is 19th.

The ring is WAY too full here with twelve or thirteen people in there. Shelton, the US Champion, is 20th. Punk and Jericho are on the top for some reason and Shelton does a running double Downward Spiral to them, which is called a reverse DDT by JR because he’s an idiot. Regal is 21st and he’s the guy that Punk beat for the IC Title.

Mysterio puts Henry out which is of course perfectly fine. Kofi, still not a big deal at all but getting very popular very fast, is 22nd. Taker is bleeding which I’d assume is hardway and he throws out Shelton. Kane is 23rd. Rey is upside down and hanging on in a weird looking position. Lawler counts 12 or 13 people in there. Kane and Taker hook up for awhile for a double chokeslam on DiBiase. Punk puts Regal out. R-Truth is 24th.

There are WAY too many people in there and even more just laying around and doing absolutely nothing at the moment. That’s the problem with having people last a long time in there. They’re used to ten to twenty minute matches at most so this is the equivalent of a rest hold. Rob Van Dam is 25th to an EPIC pop. The whole match stops to watch.

Something that would crack me up is if they didn’t know he was coming. He does his top rope kick to Kane who just watches it happen. I know there’s no point in having him in there as there’s no way he’ll win, but he’s a WRESTLER and a former world champion. There’s his validation. Kendrick is 26th. He manages to put Kofi out and then be thrown out in 15 seconds. Van Dam is just so ridiculously over it’s scary.

Dolph Ziggler, still meaning nothing, is 27th. He runs into Kane resulting in a quick elimination. There are at least 14 people in there and most of them are doing nothing with maybe 4 really working in there. Ross actually says they’re trying to keep up with the action. Santino is 28 and breaks Warlord’s record by being clotheslined out in 1 second by Kane who was right there. Hogan got a running start to put out Warlord which explains the time lapse.

HHH and Taker go at it which is always awesome. Jim Freaking Duggan is 29th. REALLY? This is what ticks people off about the modern WWE. Shad can’t get in there? Primo can’t? Instead we put a 50 year old jobber in there instead. Yes he’s won before but we don’t wheel Luger out to be in there also.

Big Show is number 30, so here’s your final group. You may need a pillow as this might last into the night. The group is Rey, HHH, DiBiase, Jericho, Knox, Finlay, Rhodes, Taker, Punk, Kane, R-Truth, RVD, Duggan and Show. That’s 14 people. DO YOU THINK THAT’S ENOUGH? Well since they’re all in here let’s get rid of them. Everyone stops except Duggan who keeps punching someone while everyone else stops to watch which looks really stupid.

He and Taker have their requited showdown and Kane does the required run in to stop it. Show puts out Duggan. Jericho jumps on Show which is amusing now. Truth gets thrown out by Show after a beating. Show throws Punk over three times and then knocks him out with a right hand. Punk’s selling is masterful. You know, the selling he demonstrated when he tapped to Cena in 2 minutes at the Slammies because that made SO much sense right?

Show puts out Knox and Rey as Horny comes in for no apparent reason and then Kane eliminates Finlay. Van Dam nods at a referee which I’d assume means something. Show and Taker go at it of course because that has to happen at least once every six months. Yeah Van Dam goes out soon after so I’m assuming a referee signaled that he was next out or something. I’ve always wondered how they knew when to do that.

Taker puts out Jericho and we’re down to seven. We’ve got Legacy, the big trio and HHH. There goes Kane, shocking no one as he jobs first. Legacy goes after Taker which is surprising. Taker counters with a double clothesline and a chokeslam for Orton. He doesn’t throw him over because he has to win though. Taker and Show have a boxing match or something resembling one. Taker has somehow shrunk from 7’0 to 6’11 to 6’10 to now 6’9 over the years.

Orton tries and RKO but just gets shoved off which never gets old. Taker and Show fight on the apron and Orton puts Show out who then pulls Taker out. Priceless being caught in a double choke by Taker made me imagine them in the locker room and Taker saying boys I’ve got cups older than you so sit down. That leaves us with Legacy and HHH as it’s all about him again.

This is a step down from HHH, Batista, Cena and Kane from last year. You ever notice how HHH is ALWAYS around near the end of these things? He was close in 98, won in 2002, 3rd in 2006, 2nd in 2008 and 2nd in 2009. That’s most interesting isn’t it? He of course throws out Legacy and then Orton dumps him for the completely inevitable win. Massive posing takes us out.

Rating: D. This just wasn’t that good. WAY too many people and WAY too much laying around just drained the life out of it. Van Dam coming in was great but Orton was so clearly the winner here that it sucked the life out of it. That’s something I burned Sly on once as he said that this was one of the best Rumbles ever and then slipped and said that the way you determine a good Rumble is by saying anyone could win.

I asked who else could have won in 09. I’m waiting on a reply to that and it’s been nearly a year boss. Anyway, this wasn’t interesting to me back then or now as it was just about HHH vs. the world and that’s simply not interesting. Of course, they would feud for the majority of the year and kill Raw in the process, but Vince is in love with Orton despite what ratings say so there we go.

Overall Rating: B+. Rumble aside, this is a great show. You have four solid matches with drama and title changes and storyline advancement. What more could you ask for out of this thing? I really liked it and it came out very well. The Rumble itself was pretty bad but then again so was Raw as a whole this year. As for the show, watch it but stop the DVD before the Rumble but after the Rumble package.

So that’s the Royal Rumble up til now. Since this is December 23rd, I have no idea what the 2010 card is going to look like so I have no predictions. Overall, the Rumble is the epitome of hit or miss in the company as some like 92 and 04 are classics and great matches while some like 95 or 99 make you long for a 2000 WCW PPV. It’s been able to make stars like Benoit and Shawn while at the same time some have won it and then done nothing like Duggan, Studd and that Austin guy.

It’s the most unique battle royal in wrestling and it’s the real start to Mania which is what it should be. That first three months or even four months of the year is predicated on this one match and other than one year it’s always been at least a 40 minute match so you’re in for a long one. This is definitely something special, and to think it all started so Vince could screw Crockett. Anyway, tomorrow is the Rumble and I’ll likely be pumped.

Sheamus is currently world champion and I still can’t get over that. Anyway, thanks for reading this and I hope you liked it. That wraps up the big four but I’ll be around with random reviews and some stuff from other companies so keep reading or start if you haven’t read this. Wait what?

Impact
Date: January 27, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
Episode Title: Crimson Sees Red

It’s almost a go home show tonight as they’ve spent more time building up to February 3^rd than Against All Odds which is perfectly fine as 2/3 is a huge show.  Also, it’s nice to see TNA building up to a major event for weeks rather than hours.  When you do that, more people might actually watch.  Anyway, tonight we’ll likely be focusing on the new THEY and hopefully finding out some more about how Crimson is connected to this.  Also expect more about Angle vs. Jarrett.  Let’s get to it.

As usual we open with a recap of last week, mainly focusing on Jarrett/Angle and then Crimson.

Angle opens the show properly without music for some reason this week.  He talks about last week and everything that happened before moving on to how he made a promise not to wrestle again.  But sometimes there are things you have to deal with, and in this case it’s Jarrett.  He’s the best in the world and he does it for the people.  Would the people want to see Kurt in the ring one more time?  Based on the cheers it seems that they would.

Bischoff and Immortal come out and Bischoff says that there’s no way he’s wrestling again because he’s retired.  Kurt apparently needs to find a new hobby.  Eric sends Immortal down and they beat the heck out of Kurt.  Taz mentions that Eric took away the pyro and music so that’s covered.  Crimson runs in with a bat for the save and clears the ring.

Flair goes on a classic rant, saying that THEY is him, Bischoff and Hogan and are already here.  Hogan hasn’t been seen in two months but he’s still here I guess.  Flair, as Kurt’s god, lifts the ban on Angle wrestling and makes Angle vs. Jarrett tonight.  Jeff loses it but Flair finishes his statement and makes it Angle/Crimson vs. all of Immortal.  Flair’s face is beet red.  He screams more as we go to a break.

Back with Eric taking credit for making Angle says he’d retire if he lost.  “Ric, have you lost your mind?”  Flair of course responds with taking off his jacket, shouting at the top of his lungs and talking about Kool-Aid.  This is absolutely hilarious and I really don’t know if that’s intentional or not.

Dixie speaks tonight.

Sarita/Tara/Madison Rayne vs. Velvet Skye/Mickie James/Angelina Love

We see the Beautiful People in the back but Winter grabs Angelina and asks why are you doing this to us?  Love says chill because Velvet is my BFF.  Winter is crushed and screams, beating the tar out of a wall or something.  Dang it quit having the camera on anything other than Velvet during her entrance?  This is under elimination rules because a gimmick is needed in at least half the matches on a Russo show.

They brawl before the match starts and then we get a bell.  Tara vs. Angelina to start but it’s off to Sarita and Mickie soon.  Dixie is the topic of course and we get the legal ruling on Immortal and TNA next week.  Also she’s still President.  I’m assuming that means a figurehead spot at the moment?  Off to Velvet and Sarita now as Velvet is still obsessed with beating her.

Madison tries to come in but Mickie counters her.  Madison tries to load up the glove but is thrown out by Velvet.  The distraction allows Sarita to roll her up to make it 3-2.  Mickie gets in but is sent to the apron soon.  She gets rammed by Tara’s elbow pad and Madison comes in.  Madison is knocked down and falls on her own glove to knock herself out and Mickie gets the pin.  A second later Sarita rolls up Mickie to get us down to Angelina vs. Sarita/Tara.

Angelina gets a small package on Sarita for two as we take a break.  Back with Anelina vs. Sarita still.  Angelina reverses a belly to back and gets a spin kick for two.  They show a reply of the Madison elimination and see that she completely missed the glove that knocked her out but that’s an understandable error as fast as she was falling.  We cut to the back with Velvet on the ground holding her head.  Winter vs. Velvet for Angelina’s affections works for me.

Over to Tara now after a long body scissors by Angelina.  Tara lasts just a few seconds as it’s back to Sarita.  Sarita gets something close to a snap suplex for two.  We’re over 12 minutes into this match now with a lot of it being this handicap match.  I don’t remember a Knockouts match this long in awhile other than maybe the cage match.  The heels double team Angelina a bit but Love fights them off and hits the Botox Injection to Tara to make it 1-1.  Sarita gets a rollup reversed and Angelina gets the win at 13:35.

Rating: C-. The match got a lot better once we got down to 2-1.  The first half was incredibly sloppy and they were going too fast with the eliminations.  I’m not sure what the point was to it going so long but it wasn’t a bad match.  I like them having an angle in the division if not multiple angles too.  Nice to see that for a change.

Angle is on the phone with someone and says they have to accelerate their plans.  Kurt wants the person here tonight.

Back with Matt making fun of Anderson’s saying things twice deal.  Matt says Anderson won’t make it to February 3.  He also mentions having Cold Blood which gets some emphasis.

Kaz is at the announce table.  We’re going to have three triple threats over the next three weeks.  The winners will meet at Against All Odds for a final triple threat for the #1 contender spot.  Wow think they’re taking enough time getting to that?

Max Buck vs. Amazing Red vs. Chris Sabin

We get comments from everyone with Red saying he’s the original face of the X Division, Max saying it’s either his or his brother’s time and Sabin says destiny is knocking at his door (Kaz: wouldn’t that upset Velvet Sky?  Sabin and her date if that makes no sense).  It’s a wild match as you would expect to start with Max being sent to the floor a few times.

Big dive by Sabin takes out Red and it’s Max vs. Sabin in the ring.  A low dropkick gets two.  Surprisingly enough Kaz is the most entertaining part of this match.  Jeremy chokes Red on the floor for a bit.  That apparently doesn’t work as he gets a dropkick off the top to take out both guys.  Red gets his speed going to take down Max with a spinning DDT.  Red dives at Sabin who catches him in a suplex position and slams him down into a neckbreaker for two.

Max vs. Sabin now with a nice gymnastics routine resulting in a faceplant by Max which gets two for him.  Nice kind of sunset bomb by Red for two as Jeremy pops up so his brother can still win.  Red goes up but gets crotched by Jeremy.  Elevated DDT out of the corner by Max is enough to pin Red at 5:10.  Fun match.

Rating: B. Fun match indeed here in the vein of the old school Cruiserweight matches in WCW.  This was a spot fest and that’s exactly what the X Division should be.  These matches are great ways to get a crowd going and it was short enough to not get dull.  Fun match and exactly what it needed to be.

Karen is paranoid about Kurt being on the phone.  Jeff says to calm down but Karen is still worried.

Jeff Hardy is up next.

Back with Velvet saying she’s fed up with Winter who attacked her.  She tells Angelina to deal with Winter or she will.

We recap Jeff vs. Anderson and their feud to hype up next week.

Here’s Jeff.  I still don’t see him as a big star when I look at him.  I didn’t in WWE and I don’t here.  He yells at the fans and says that they’re all a bunch of smarks and internet junkies.  At BFG he took the title and the money because he is TNA.  Half the fans chant for him and half of them chant where’s your title.  Now let’s talk about the jerk.  Jeff says he’s going to win the title back next week and shove it in all the fans’ faces.  This was just…bad.  He sounded like a guy in OVW that has been around for three months.

Anderson comes down to the ring and holds up the title.  He says Jeff complains and moans a lot, sounding like Charlie Brown’s mom.  Everything in wrestling is about wins and losses apparently and right now Anderson has the big win.  Anderson says that even after what Hardy has put the fans through, they still like him.  Next week it’s all about the title and when the match is over, Anderson will still be the Total Nonstop Action Total Nonstop Anderson.  I’m not a fan of Anderson but he destroyed Hardy here.

Eliminate the Hate PSA.

Crimson says a few weeks ago he was here for his brother Red.  Recently though he was given an offer he couldn’t refuse.  Next week we’ll find out who that offer came from.  Could they make this any more obvious?

We get a recap of what Crimson has done.  Abyss is hurt badly apparently and is out indefinitely.  No word on the TV Title.

Here’s Velvet with no music.  She calls out Winter with a ton of profanity.  Winter comes out and Velvet drills her before she can get in.  This goes on for awhile until Winter beats her down with some shots.  Angelina finally comes out to break it up.  The fans chant She’s a Screamer.  I want to end the Impact Zone audience.

Pope is on his way to the ring as we take a break.

Here’s Pope who says that maybe he said some things that shouldn’t have been said but he said some things that should have been said.  Pope is pure which is why he always wears white.  Tonight he’s going to confess to something.  Pope talks about how so many people aren’t honest with themselves and don’t like the people they’re around.

He’s better than all of us apparently, so he’s going to kneel down and confess.  He gets about one knee down but pulls up saying that he doesn’t like Joe.  Pope goes on a rant saying he is going to fix things like he always has.  Next week someone is going to confess just like he did.

Flair is giving Fourtune a pep talk and for no apparent reason Eric Young is there.  Fourtune leaves and Eric stays.  Flair goes off on him and says the title Eric has means nothing.  Eric leaves saying good talk Ric.  This was kind of pointless.  The Eric aspect I mean.

Back with a recap of Hogan’s arrival in TNA and how it led to the whole THEY story.  When you condense it really well like this the angle actually looks and sounds pretty awesome.

Dixie is on the phone and says that the day in court will be next Thursday and we’ll hear the decision that night.  This phone call lasted all of 30 seconds.  So in other words control of a major company and a fraudulent contract signing can be settled in court in a single day along with the action of that day in court being enacted on the same day?

Eric offers a rebuttal, saying next week Immortal will get the gold back and Hogan is back too.

Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Anderson

Matt hammers Anderson down a bit but can’t get a move off the top.  He does manage to drape Anderson’s arm over the top though and gets a one arm DDT for two.  Anderson’s arm goes into the post while the announcers plug next week’s major show.  The top of Anderson’s calves near his legs are really pale.  Lots of arm work here but Anderson gets a spinning neckbreaker for two.

Anderson’s rolling fireman’s carry slam is reversed and Matt uses an FU for two.  Twist of Hate is countered into the rolling fireman’s carry slam for two.  Mic Check is blocked and there’s the Side Effect for two but Anderson rolls him up for the pin at 4:12.  That came out of nowhere.

Rating: C+. Quick match but pretty good here.  They used a lot of counters and it was pretty fast paced.  They kept this short which is probably a good thing at this point.  It gave Anderson a slight injury going into the title defense next week, so I have very few complaints here for once.

Post match Jeff comes out for the beatdown.  RVD runs out for the save but the Hardys get away.  You know maybe RVD would be able to sneak up on them better if he didn’t have loud music saying ROB VAN DAM as soon as he came out.

Angle and Crimson are coming to the ring.  Angle says they’re not alone out there.

Kurt Angle/Crimson vs. Immortal

Immortal here is represented by Beer Money/Kaz/Rob Terry and Gunner/Murphy.  AJ is in street clothes as is Flair.  They’re staying on the floor it seems.  No Jarrett?  AJ is on the apron now and you have to tag here.  The referee makes them switch corners for some reason.  It seems like they’re wasting time.  Crimson vs. Roode to start with Roode hammering him back in the corner.  Is this Crimson’s official debut?

He takes over on Roode very quickly with a shoulder block and a Falcon Arrow for two.  Off to Angle who gets only a moderate pop for his first official match in months.  Kaz comes in and Angle takes over.  Off to Storm now who takes a suplex.  Angle knocks all of Immortal off the apron but Storm is able to hit a Backstabber.  Superkick misses and down goes the referee.

Angle Slam to Storm and it breaks down rather quickly.  With Angle in trouble we get Jarrett’s music.  He and Karen come out and Jeff wants Kurt on his own.  Kurt easily grabs a German but Immortal beats him down.  I’m assuming the match was thrown out at some point earlier.  Stroke to Angle and Jackson James runs out for the pin at 3:35.  No rating as the vast majority was a big beatdown.

Morgan runs out as apparently the call recipient.  I was wondering where he was tonight.  The numbers catch up with him though…and there go the lights.  A siren goes off and SCOTT STEINER is back, pipe in hand.  He clears the ring to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was very similar to Raw in that the only point of it was to build up to the big show.  In that sends it certainly worked, but at the same time the lack of wrestling hurts it a bit.  This was good for a go home show but as a regular show it wasn’t that great overall.  I want to see the show next week though, so that’s definitely a win for them.

Also I won’t be here for the review next week so I’ll see you in two weeks.

Results

Angelina Love/Velvet Sky/Mickie James b. Tara/Madison Rayne/Sarita – Angelina last eliminated Sarita to win
Max Buck b. Amazing Red and Chris Sabin – Elevated DDT to Red
Mr. Anderson b. Matt Hardy – Cradle
Immortal b. Kurt Angle/Crimson – Stroke to Angle

Royal Rumble 2008
Date: January 27, 2008
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,798
Commentators: Tazz, Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Jim Ross

You think that’s enough commentators??? Anyway, this is kind of a forgotten show other than the ending, which to be fair was completely awesome and shocking to say the least. Cena is out with an injury here and likely is going to miss everything until Mania, which sucks but that’s the way it goes. I was just starting to get into WZ around this time so that should give you an idea of what was going on back then.

Anyway, other than that we have Edge vs. Rey and Orton vs. Jeff Hardy, as he begins his year long quest for the title that truly was awesome on a lot of levels. The Rumble and the fact that this is in MSG of course are the reasons to watch the show, so let’s get to it.

The intro is as standard as you could possibly imagine, with the guys getting on a New York subway and then all of the Rumbles being mentioned, especially the big ones. Except for 04 because Benoit doesn’t exist.

Ric Flair vs. MVP

This is a career threatening match, as Flair’s next loss would be his last. This means that it’s about as obvious as the fact that Becca has balloons under her shirt that Flair isn’t losing here. Since we’re in MSG tonight, we have the altered entrance ramp. Also, we have an annoying theme as with every time the name of a guy is shown on screen, it looks like a subway going down the tracks, complete with loud sound effects.

Because you know, that’s what I need over Flair’s music: train sounds. Flair says it’s an honor to wrestle many times in MSG and that he debuted here 32 years ago. That’s just freaking scary. MVP’s music cuts him off. He’s US Champion here. Fans are clearly all over MVP. The age difference here is insane. Flair’s chops are always great for some reason. It makes me smile watching him for some reason.

To put Flair in perspective, when he first won the US Title, MVP was four years old. Flair had debuted before MVP was ALIVE. Think about that. MVP is 37 years old and 35 here, and Flair has been wrestling since before that. That’s insane. MVP actually busts out a crossface chickenwing as I’m happy already. Flair goes for the legs, which if nothing else is the one thing he’s never changed over the years.

MVP gets the Drive By and the easy pin. Wait what? Yeah he got the three, but Flair’s feet were on the ropes. You could hear the crowd just go silent in a split second which was awesome. Flair goes for a quick rollup but gets two. It amazes me that a man in his 60s has this kind of charisma.

It really is impressive. Flair counters the Playmaker into the figure four for the tap out. That’s the thing here: Flair beat MVP clean, which makes MVP, a champion, look weak. That’s not good at all, but I get that Flair’s career ending is FAR bigger than his title reign.

Rating: B-. This was a fine match but like I said I don’t like the booking here. A DQ or count out would have been fine, not a clean submission though. This was really a basic match but it worked fine. It’s nice to see someone get a clean win for once after a decent back and forth match. WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE THIS ONE THOUGH? Ok so I shouldn’t be that mad, but it’s still annoying.

Vince and Horny are in the back where Vince is explaining the history their family has at MSG. He says Horny has to win as Finlay comes in. Horny gets really excited. Back up an erase that. It’s fairly obvious where this was going.

Chris Jericho vs. JBL

JBL had cost Jericho the title at Armageddon because Jericho had bumped into him. That started the feud that led to this. It included an instance where JBL more or less tried to lynch Jericho and hurt his neck and throat badly meaning Jericho couldn’t talk for awhile. This is clearly a long time ago as Jericho has only won the IC Title seven times here. JBL is freshly out of his short retirement where he was a commentator.

Jericho looks odd as heck with the long tights now which is weird as he wore those for the majority of his career. JBL had called out Jericho’s kids and said their dad was a coward to make this personal. Jericho keeps spearing JBL but the punches he throws are pathetic. Jericho works on the back which makes sense here as JBL retired earlier because of a bad back. After a brief skirmish on the floor we go back in and JBL hits the best looking Hot Shot that I’ve ever seen.

JBL has lost a lot of weight at this point and looks a lot better. The fans are rapidly getting on him though. Jericho hits the post on the floor and he’s bleeding but not terribly. This match isn’t that good. It’s like they’re trying to find a story out there and it’s just not working at all.

We’re back on the floor again and Jericho is in control now. As JBL tries to set up a table, Jericho just blasts the tar out of him with a chair to get the DQ. That was an awesome shot. Jericho pulls out a rope and gets back at JBL for trying to hang him. Bradshaw is down for awhile after it. The beating got a great reaction for Jericho though.

Rating: D+. This just wasn’t very good at all and it was a mess most of the time. I get the part about trying to beat up JBL from Jericho’s point of view, but this was just all over the place and didn’t work well period. The ending made a lot of sense as Jericho didn’t care about the win but just hurting JBL, so I’m fine with that, but this just wasn’t very good at all.

Ashley, who is in need of a cheeseburger or something like that is looking for Maria but Santino cuts her off and says she’s not doing Playboy. Yeah she is.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Edge

Rey got this shot just by winning a Beat the Clock challenge. I’m really getting tired of people getting shots over things like qualifying matches. There are no personal feuds anymore. Orton vs. HHH got close I suppose but Orton had the title match anyway. Edge is with Vickie here and oddly enough comes out first. This was around the time when there was an attempt at having a stable called La Familia and it just failed completely.

Nothing came of it and it bombed completely. Granted that could be because it was Edge, Hawkins and Ryder, Chavo and Bam Neely with Vickie Guerrero. That’s not exactly Flair, Blanchard and the Andersons. Heck that’s not Flair, Windham, Anderson and Roma. Rey is seen just standing there waiting on his entrance which hurts things a lot. Rey’s mask looks like that of a Trojan. Where does he find these things at?

His Mania masks and outfits could work wonders as a drug education program. “Kids, do drugs and you might wind up as a short Mexican wrestler with tattoos who dresses up like the Joker.” The idea of X hearing that as a kid would explain so much. The roles are messed up here as Rey is booed out of the building and Edge gets a great pop. We hear Edge’s very impressive resume to start us off. Rey botches the heck out of rana and gets booed out of the building again as a result.

Oh man the heat on Rey is great. Actually isn’t that bad? I’m not sure. The referee catches Hawkins and Ryder about to cheat and throws them out. If nothing else Ryder can go and listen to his radio. He needs an education on how to be a lackey so maybe it taught him everything it knows. It’s 315am and I’m tired. Give me a break.

Rey’s leg is hurt. It’s so weird to hear these references to recent events and hear things that you remember. This was almost two years ago. That blows my mind. Edge starts working the knee which again makes sense here so you can’t argue that at least. The referee is good here as he checks on Rey a lot but never gets in the way. That’s a nice little touch in there.

Rey’s quick stuff is just completely insane. Also he’s selling quite well here so I’m rather pleased with him here. In a nice touch, Rey kicks Edge in the face but uses his good leg. That’s very smart as he has enough to stand on the bad one, which while a bit of a stretch is believable, but he gets offense in and stronger offense than he would by using the weak leg. That’s not bad at all.

And there goes the intelligence as he goes up top and does a double stomp. Rey, your lack of intelligence disturbs me. In a cool spot he makes up for it though in a unique spot. With Edge on the floor, Rey gets a hobbling start but slides face forward so his arms go first and grabs Edge by the head for a tornado DDT. That’s very smart because he protects the leg. That my friends is psychology.

Rey hits a splash from the top after the 619 but Vickie pulls the referee out after jumping out of her wheelchair. Rey goes for another 619 but Vickie jumps onto the apron and he kicks her. This of course would put her in the wheelchair for months. Rey stops for a second to go oh crap and when he hits a springboard, Edge hits a great spear for the pin. Vickie gets the big sympathy thing from Edge as she is wheeled out.

Rating: A-. I really liked Rey here and for the life of me I don’t get the crowd. To be fair though, New York is the mother of the smark towns so that is your likely answer. This wasn’t bad at all for a token title defense. It came off pretty well with the knee being a great point to work with. Rey impressed me a lot here with some of his innovations to protect his leg. This came out very well and I liked it a lot, Vickie aside.

Flair comes out of the shower and Kennedy is waiting on him. He says he would love to beat Flair. Shawn makes the unneeded save with a great line of “kids these days”. Shawn makes fun of himself which is always great stuff. Batista shows up as does HHH and it’s awkward. I know this because they tell us it’s awkward. Shawn of course pushes his new shirt.

Orton and Hardy are getting ready.

Maria, looking mostly hot comes out for the first ever HD Kiss Cam. This goes on for like 90 seconds and is just annoying. Ashley comes out for no apparent reason. Good night she’s disturbing looking and gets no reaction. The mention of Maria in Playboy draws out Santino in a JEALOUS RAGE!!! He has someone under a cover too. There’s a jobber joke there somewhere.

I love how Santino makes fun of the New York teams here but earlier this year he did the decent jersey bit. He says the Giants will choke in the Super Bowl. Considering what happened, that’s just hilarious. I’ll give him this: he can draw cheap heat like no one not named Mick Foley. Under the sheet is of course Big Dick Johnson in Patriots apparel. In other news, X is defecting to the Jets. Ashley looks like the pole she belongs on.

Mike Adamle does the intro for the video package, famously calling him Jeff Harvey. We go to the video package, and easily this is one of the best ones the company has ever put together. Instead of just highlighting the three weeks leading up to the match (it was 6-7 here so that helped a lot) they show miniature bios of Jeff and Randy and their roads to getting here, with Jeff’s set to Rooftops by the Lost Prophets and since that’s one of my favorite songs it helps a lot.

They then have a thing where they jump back and forth between two segments on Raw: Randy punting Matt while Jeff is in the ring and Jeff’s INSANE dive onto Orton off the Raw set that was a legit scary thing. The problem was simple though. As Norcal put it after that, “Man, is Jeff gonna jump off the roof at the Rumble?” That summed it up right there: how could Jeff top this? Either way, this has me way into the match that I know the ending to and took place nearly two years ago. That’s very impressive.

Raw World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton

The key to this whole match is simple: Jeff could win. That was the whole thing anyone could talk about on WZ leading up to this: Jeff could win. Jeff is IC Champion here. Orton doesn’t hear voices yet. We get the big match intros which work well here. There’s no crowd confusion here which is a plus. They do the stupid bell ringing twice thing so in other words the match isn’t going on right now but whatever.

It’s a really basic thing to start but Orton is playing to the crowd really well now that he’s in control. Jeff gets a great baseball slide and Orton hits the barrier and his head looks like it’s not attached. That looks awesome. Ross is WAY too excited over this match. Orton tries to leave with the belt as he draws great heel heat. He’s a lot better here than he usually is.

In an unintentional great visual, the belt is on the ground and Jeff is down stretching his arms out and he can’t reach it. I don’t think he knew it was there but it looked great. Orton busts out the Orton Stomp just to tick me off a bit. It’s an old Ronnie Garvin move so no wonder it annoys me.Orton’s offense has been kind of all over the place and there’s been very little flow to this.

It’s been more or less a long brawl, although to be fair we’re 8 minutes in which from what I’ve seen is about half of the match so there’s time left. And just as I say that Jeff makes a comeback and we hit the floor again. Back in the ring, Jeff takes a GREAT shoulder post shot. That might have been the best I’ve ever seen as he freaking dives for it. This just isn’t that interesting of a match.

I think the problem simply is that the buildup was so awesome and then at the end of the day, it’s going to be a Randy Orton match which means it’s likely not going to be that good. Jeff comes back with an awesome looking Whisper in the Wind, which is my favorite Hardy move. It more or less ended with his leg slamming into Orton’s head so it almost looked like it ended with a Fameasser or a leg drop.

Granted it was completely by accident but whatever. Orton gets out of the way of the Swanton a bit later but gets sent to the floor. Jeff completely misses a top rope moonsault that at least they cover up with a quick camera cut.

Jeff more or less landed next to Orton which they of course show on a replay because the camera people are freaking stupid at times. And we go back in and Orton counters a Twist of Fate into the RKO to end it. I get that the move is supposed to come out of nowhere, but that ending came out of nowhere and not in the cool exciting way but in the that felt like it was bad way.

Rating: C-. The problem here like I said earlier is the hype. The hype here was off the charts and they simply weren’t going to be able to live up to it no matter what. That’s where this match lost it and that can’t be blamed on Orton and Hardy. That being said, this just was kind of a mess.

It’s not awful, but it’s a letdown and just not very good. Hardy wasn’t ready yet, but this was a good test for him. He would chase the title all year (minus the three month suspension for being an idiot and getting high) before winning it in a SHOCKER at Armageddon.

Royal Rumble

They actually have Michael Buffer doing the ring announcing. That’s awesome. He just sounds right doing this to say the least. Taker is number one and Michaels is number two, because it’s completely realistic to think that two guys that were numbers the last two last year would be numbers one and two this year. Buffer messes up his name though. He says it right but he sounds like there should be something coming after it.

They say a few people have come in at number one and won the match but they don’t say who, obviously due to the suckitude of Rey’s win. That’s all it could be right? We’re into minute number three of Taker’s entrance at this point. BIG old pop for Shawn. Well we know they’re not going out first. Did I mention all 6 guys are calling the Rumble this year? Yes because we need two guys to scream about everything, two analysts that aren’t that good and two idiots.

Santino is number three because two Hall of Famers aren’t good enough and we need comedy. Shawn kicks him in the face and Taker dumps him out. Well at least it was the right decision. Intervals are 90 seconds this year. Shawn counters Old School because no one has ever done that before. Khali is number four to a groan. Taker jumps him as the announcers point out how he used to knock Taker around, yet neglects to mention that Taker put him out with relative ease last year.

The smart crowd of course goes into the You Can’t Wrestle chant. Taker puts him out in about a minute for the second year in a row. Hardcore Holly, who is a tag champion here along with Cody Rhodes, is number five. It’s an even numbered year so it’s time to push him again. John Morrison, just starting to get over as a tag wrestler here, is number 6. Shawn and Morrison need to be given 20 minutes one day to just tear the house down.

Dreamer, who asked for his release today, is number 7. These intervals are WAY shorter than 90 seconds. Batista is in maybe a minute later. Taker and Batista have the big showdown that lasts just a few seconds before Dreamer goes after Batista and gets thrown out. They reference the clocks going fast as Horny is 9th. Oh screw it. He goes under the ring as Batista spears Taker.

We’ve got Holly, Horny, Morrison, Shawn, Batista and Taker in there. Ok, that might have been 45 seconds this time. Chuck the stupid biker Palumbo is 10th. It was another vain attempt to make him mean a thing and it failed completely. He’s just turned heel and no one cared in the slightest. He was feuding with Noble of all people and couldn’t beat him. That’s saying a lot.

Taker throws Morrison but he makes a nice save to stay in. Amazingly, Noble is 11th, just after his rival Palumbo. He’s gone in about thirty seconds thanks to Chucky. Punk, who would win the world title in the summer, is number 12. He just lost the ECW Title a few weeks before this to Chavo but would win MITB at Mania. He puts Palumbo out just before Rhodes is 13th. Umaga is 14th and nothing at all is going on here.

He’s got the incredibly bright red tights on here and he puts Holly out after shouting a lot. This is just terribly boring. Snitsky, amazingly still with a job, is number 15. Rhodes and Punk almost gets him out but that fails of course as Rhodes isn’t over yet. Morrison and Punk go at it renewing the real rivalry as Miz is number 16.

Taker and Umaga, who were supposed to feud about a dozen times but never did for whatever reason, fight for awhile until the minute passes and Shelton comes in at 17. Michaels kicks him out with ease. Well ok then. After about 30 seconds, Jimmy Snuka is 18th. Seriously? That’s the best you can come up with? He looks AWFUL. This is what I don’t like about WWE.

Shelton, a young guy with talent is in there for 15 seconds and Snuka gets a few minutes. What’s the point in that? Taz says that Snuka and Miz live two complete lives. He then throws in different, which helps because I thought they were the same person there for a bit. Nice job clearing that up there buddy. In at number 19 is Roddy Piper of all people. WHY?? To be fair he gets a great pop and looks decent.

Oh good night he took his shirt off. He needs to keep that freaking thing on. Old worlds collide as Piper and Snuka fight with everyone else stopping to watch them fight. Ok, the clock might have made it 30 seconds there as this is ridiculous. Piper is awesome but not in the ring in 2008. Kane comes in at 20 and I think you know the drill. He puts Piper and Snuka out to thankfully clear out the WAY to crowded ring a bit.

It’s still way too full but that’s a lot better. We get a big mess with Shawn, Taker, Snitsky and Umaga as Carlito is 21st. Shawn might have a broken nose. 22 is…Mick Foley? Well, I guess it makes more sense than Snuka and Piper. He gets a HUGE pop. He and Horny qualified together a few weeks before this. They’re chanting his name so I can actually accept this one to an extent.

At the moment we have Taker, Shawn, Morrison, Batista, Horny (under the ring), Punk, Rhodes, Umaga, Snitsky, Miz, Kane, Carlito and Foley. See what I mean about it being too full? To be fair though, that’s an awesome list of people for the most part. Kennedy is 23rd to a freaking ROAR. If he could have stayed healthy and been used right, he could have been a huge deal. Ok no he wouldn’t have been but when he was hot he was very hot.

Freaking Big Daddy V brings the combined talent in the ring down about 1000% though at 24. Snitsky is put out by Taker but he turns around into Sweet Chin Music to eliminate him but before Shawn can turn around Kennedy dumps him. That was fast paced if nothing else. Taker beats on Snitsky because he’s ticked off. Kane beats on BDV who isn’t wearing a shirt and is therefore disturbing. Rhodes is thrown over but skins the cat to stay alive.

WHO CAME UP WITH THAT NAME??? Did wrestling promoters like to skin cats or something? Just a freaking weird choice for a name. Mark Henry is 25th. Miz is in trouble and Horny pops out to pull him out. Punk takes a double headbutt from Henry and V. That can’t hurt that bad as both are hollow.

And here we have the proof that the ECW Title means nothing as Chavo is number 26. He’s a world champion and can have any title shot he wants if he wins. So, could he fight himself? Edge and Orton aren’t in here, yet he is. There’s all the proof you need that the ECW Title means nothing. Kane puts Morrison out. Horny tries to do the same thing to Henry that he did to Miz and he gets pulled back in.

The two big black men try to decide who gets to eat him but Finlay jumps the gun to save him. He uses that club and gets disqualified for it which is nonsense and Horny leaves with him, as both are gone. Elijah “Deangelo Dinero” Burke, who I swear to you has talent and potential even though I’ve never seen it but everyone says he does so it HAS to be true right? Chavo puts out Punk. Don’t worry Punk fans as he would have a much better year in the future.

Batista goes under the bottom rope to the floor. HHH is 29th and so it begins, as everyone starts wondering who number 30 is. There goes Rhodes. Big Daddy V follows. He puts out Foley which is still an awesome sight. This has been way over 90 seconds as to the next entrant. Burke is gone. Umaga takes a Pedigree and there’s the clock.

In easily the biggest Rumble shocker of the all time and arguably one of the biggest shockers in wrestling history, JOHN CENA IS NUMBER THIRTY! He had gotten hurt on October 1st and it was said he would be out until Mania at the least. This was easily the best kept secret in the company probably ever as NO ONE, and I mean NO ONE saw this coming. The LD more or less exploded at the time and with good reason.

This was EPIC. MSG has goes silent and then erupts in about 4 seconds as even New York is stunned. Everyone stops dead in the ring as I wonder who actually knew about this. Oh before I forget the final group is Batista, Umaga, Kane, Carlito, Kennedy, Henry, Chavo, HHH and now Cena. Carlito and Chavo are out in seconds thanks to Cena as the winner is about as obvious as possible now. Henry is out now and there’s your showdown as he walks into HHH.

As they fight you can see Chavo running to the back which is very odd. Batista spears the heck out of Umaga as Kennedy is put out by Batista and then he does the same to Umaga, to make the final four Batista, HHH, Cena and Kane who is put out to get us to three. The IWC was about to commit mass suicide at this point based on these three being the finalists. All three do their taunts to each other and it’s on.

Batista is put out and we’re down to two. And there it is, as Cena becomes the most hated man in New York City in less than ten seconds. Well he is from Boston I guess. In the most predictable elimination in Rumble history, Cena FUs HHH out to end it and go to Mania, even though he would lose in a triple threat that really should have just been HHH vs. Cena. Posing closes the show.

Rating: C-. And most of that is for Cena. This just wasn’t that good of a Rumble as there were too many spots near and after the middle that were just boring beyond belief with nothing of note happening. It was ok, but nothing great at all. Cena’s return is absolutely awesome though and makes the match on all kinds of levels. It’s ok, but there are far better Rumbles.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked it. It’s not a terrible show by any sense of the word, but at the same time, it’s certainly not great. There’s no truly great match on the card but it’s fine for what it is. Cena returning turned the company upside down and more or less reset the whole road to Wrestlemania.

Hardy and Orton is ok but not great at all. There’s decent stuff here, but with just five matches it’s a bit hard to get behind. Check it out for Cena’s return and that’s about all, but don’t avoid it if that makes sense.

I added three new pages which will be permanently linked on the top of the page.

Contact – My e-mail address for this site where you can get in touch with me for questions, comments, suggestions or anything like that.

Donations – Well I had to put it up sooner or later.  If you’re interested in helping me get my hands on various shows including the monthly PPVs from both companies or just running the site in general, or if you just want to send me some cash, my PayPal information is in there.  Anything would be appreciated.

Entire Archive – Again, trying to cover the costs of this place, if anyone is interested in the entire archive of well over 300 shows I’ve reviewed, the information about it can be found in there.

Added in some sites that I like, some of which are wrestling related but some of which aren’t.  Enjoy.

Royal Rumble 2007
Date: January 28, 2007
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 13,500
Commentators: JBL, Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Jim Ross

Well, there are two main differences here. First off is ECW is back. They’re still complete and utter crap as they tried to be a legit place and not AAA, so take that for what it’s worth. The other thing is Angle is gone, having went to TNA where he still is today in a SHOCKER. That’s not hyperbole either as it legitimately was a stunning turn of events. This was the first real step for TNA to show that they were legit and it’s still an awesome moment to this day.

As for the people still on Vince’s payroll, we have Batista vs. Kennedy and Cena vs. Umaga in a last man standing match, both of which are of course for the titles. If nothing else these are perfect Rumble title matches so let’s get to this show. Also, something historic happens here which I’ll get to later on.

The intro is the standard thing about the title matches and the Rumble, with the main focus being on the Rumble and Cena. That’s fine. They do however mess up and say that the Road to Mania has been around for 20 years now. No it hasn’t, as the Mania tie in didn’t become official until 93. Look back at the first two shows: Duggan won, and wound up losing in the first round of the tournament.

In 89 Studd won and was a guest referee at Mania. This may be relatively common knowledge, but just in case someone here hasn’t noticed, Vince likes to rewrite history every now and then. This is being billed as the most star studded Rumble in history. I haven’t looked at the entrants but I’m guessing that’s not true given some of the shows I’ve seen. Oh and the ECW guys are Extremists here.

Hardys vs. MNM

Melina is amazing looking to say the least. I know I often say that there’s no real point to this feud, but in this case there really isn’t much of one. MNM had broken up as the Hardys had reunited but rather than as a team they’re more like two singles guys teaming, which I usually hate but the history together makes it ok.

The Hardys were on a Survivor Series team together so they restarted the team and for the awful December 2 Dismember show (we’ll get to that someday) they threw out an open challenge which MNM accepted. This was supposed to be a one night reunion so the next month when they teamed up again in a 4 team TLC match, Mercury took one of the sickest bumps ever which was completely by accident.

Paul London did the seesaw thing with a ladder where he jumped on one side to launch the other up and the corner slammed into Mercury’s face and completely shattered his nose and part of his eye. It looked awful and he’s still got a protective mask on. Jeff is the IC Champion here. Oh and they’re the Hardys, not the Hardy Boys. You can really see the strides Nitro (Morrison) has made here and it’s impressive. Apparently Matt has a dislocated jaw.

They actually bring up a decent point here as they say that since Matt has a bad jaw, he hasn’t been able to eat solid food and might not have his peak energy. For once, that works. Jeff’s pop is epic. The beauty of the way the Hardys fight is that even if they botch the heck out of most of what they do, it fits their style and it could be believable that they meant to do that. Melina is letting loose those screams which I actually like.

Ross says he hasn’t made a lot of women scream. I’ll leave that one up to you guys. Jeff is so spotty that it’s insane. I usually don’t notice it, but DANG he’s bad here. This match feels like they were told to go out there and have an epic tag match rather than just having one and that’s not a good thing. MNM is ok, but at the same time this match is just sloppy and that’s hurting it a lot.

The crowd is about half into this but at the same time they’re not into it if that makes sense. Ross mentions that this is a one fall match to open the show. Why don’t they have more 2/3 falls matches? Those can be fun when they’re done right but you never see them again.

Matt gets the hot tag to start completely dominating the match. The usual double finisher ends it which was really quite lackluster. Oh and apparently Matt is on Smackdown and Jeff is on Raw, completely going against the theory of the freaking brand split as it comes closer and closer to dying every year.

Rating: B-. This just wasn’t that good. I like that they were trying to have a big time tag match, but these teams just weren’t clicking. It was FAR better at December 2 Dismember, but I think here that they were trying to top that match which was just a bad idea. This match was all kinds of sloppy and the ending wasn’t anything special. This was ok at its best and too long at its worst.

We go to the back where Teddy Long and Coach are running the drawing and Kelly is there barely dressed. Edge shows up, leading to him calling Coach Coacher and Coach calling Edge Edger. Take me now. Kelly was still an exhibitionist at the time and loved to tell everyone that. Rated RKO were the tag champions here so Orton shows up. Let the gay jokes begin. King Booker shows up to make fun of them as this is just rather stupid and unfunny.

Ad for the All Grown Up Wrestlemania, which was a campaign I actually liked for a change.

Thanks to a band we’ve never heard of for a song that has no bearing on the show and won’t be heard again.

We recap Test vs. Lashley, which more or less consisted of Test “dominating” ECW and wanting a title match because of it. There was a triple threat with RVD in there somewhere too that meant nothing at all. Test is apparently an impact player.

ECW Title: Test vs. Bobby Lashley

Take a wild guess as to how this is going to go. Just take a guess. Test was a guy that Vince kept trying to push but it never worked. That might have had something to do with Test having all the momentum in the world and Vince pushing Big Show instead back in 99 when Austin left. Oh yeah Big Show is gone now too. Lashley was another guy that Vince was seemingly ready to pull the trigger on but never got to do so which kind of sucks.

Lashley does the Lesnar entrance where he jumps to the apron and the pyro goes off. That would be more impressive if X-Pac wasn’t the first guy to do it often. There’s no big match feeling here at all. This is as basic of a match as you could imagine. It’s like they were reading a book about how to have a power vs. power match.

Lashley dominates for awhile, Test sends him into the post, Lashley gets a short comeback, Test hits the big boot and Lashley kicks out, so Test walks out. Seriously, that’s the entire 8 minute match.

Rating: D-. What in the heck was the point of this? What was the point of ECW as a whole back then? When did we reach the point where ECW had a back then? Anyway, this was really weak as there was just no point to this whatsoever and the match completely failed. Lashley wasn’t that solid yet and Test didn’t help matters in the slightest. This didn’t go well at all and it showed badly here. Horrible match with a stupid finish.

Cena is in the back getting looked at by the doctor. Umaga injured his ribs the Monday before. Vince comes in and says that Cena won’t be able to forfeit as Cena can’t see him. I really hate Vince at times.

No Way Out promo. My goodness that was an AWFUL show.

We recap Kennedy vs. Batista. The idea here is that Kennedy has beaten 6 world champions in a year, so he’s getting a title shot here. Kennedy won a Beat the Clock Sprint to get the shot. I’ve always liked that idea, at least to an extent. I think Kennedy stole Norcal’s shirt.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Mr. Kennedy

Kennedy cuts a promo before the match saying exactly what you would expect him to say. Kennedy had no official move yet so he’s unlikely to win. I think it was a neckbreaker or a DDT or something like that but he changed it every week. JBL keeps trying to offer analysis and keeps yelling at Cole for interrupting him which gets funny. At least it’s not Joey Styles because he would have a black eye from it.

Kennedy uses a weird looking leg lock. Imagine a figure four, but with the guy that’s in it on his stomach. It looked rather awesome. A knee to the leg causes JBL to declare that’s how you win a world title. I thought it was by getting a pin or a submission on a world champion in a title match but what do I know? This is mainly Kennedy working on the knee, which is smart but it’s the safe way to go.

With Kennedy being allegedly the future of the company, shouldn’t he do something that’s a bit more interesting or fresh? Batista makes his comeback, actually selling the knee (PAY ATTENTION TAKER!) and goes for the Bomb. It doesn’t work though as Kennedy shoves him into the referee.

He gets a low blow and the neckbreaker but we have no referee. There’s a very loud and very noticeable Kennedy chant, which thankfully was listened to this year as he would win MITB. However, due to about 1000 injuries nothing would come of it. Batista hits the Batista Bomb for the easy win. JBL freaking out over it is kind of funny.

Rating: B-. This was pretty good for what it was I thought. It wasn’t supposed to be a classic showdown but rather a token title defense for Batista so that he could manage to get something else under his belt and get Kennedy the title shot that he had earned. There’s nothing at all wrong with that and it worked. The match itself wasn’t that great, but the point here wasn’t to have a great match but to make Batista and Kennedy look good and that’s what happened.

Hornswoggle shows up to pick his number. He beats up Coach after getting one. Oh looks it’s Khali and Horny because that joke never gets old. He takes three of them and leaves two, allowing Kelly to make a joke and Ron Simmons to show up to validate his existence.

The Marine is on DVD.

Mania promo, set to Ladies and Gentlemen by Saliva. They actually mention that at their concerts. Saliva is in the crowd.

So Umaga had been an unbeatable monster that challenged Cena for the title at New Year’s Revolution but lost so naturally he gets another title match at the Rumble. The idea is that Cena could barely keep Umaga down for three so ten is impossible. Umaga crushed Cena with a splash through a table at Raw. You know, I wonder how you can have more than one last man standing match. Wouldn’t that mean there have been more than one last men standing, which is impossible?

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Umaga

The end of the video package sounded like Taker’s music for some reason. Ok I’m back now, as Lillian with her hair pulled back and more or less wearing a swimsuit as it’s a top that ties behind her neck and one of those nearly invisible skirts she wears. Lawler says that Umaga reminds him of King Kong. You know, the guy that lost in the end. The start is of course, Cena getting his teeth kicked in by Umaga because he’s injured and can’t breathe.

And you know, because Umaga is a monster and Cena is the second coming of Hogan so naturally he has to be beaten down to get us to the big comeback at the end of the match. This was around three months into Cena’s year long reign that made him the most hated man in wrestling. On a completely unrelated note, Lee, Ricky and I joined the forums about three weeks before this show. Umaga puts the steps into the ring but when Cena lifts them, it’s an amazing feat of strength.

He throws them at the Samoan, but here it looks awful as the camera shows perfectly the Umaga takes it on his hands. When Kane did the same spot a few months ago, it looked and sounded great. This looked like them trying to replicate it and failing miserably. We get a bearhug, which at least makes sense here. The fans want tables. I could go for a nice lawn chair actually.

The steps are put up in the corner and Umaga does the hip ramming but misses which would actually hurt. That and a step shot gets a 7. The announcers are completely pro Cena here and aren’t even trying to be diplomatic. The formula here is Cena gets beaten up, Umaga dominates, Cena hits a big move to draw even then Umaga puts him down again. The genius that is Cena figures that the Five Knuckle Shuffle is better than slamming Umaga on the steps.

He goes for an FU but in a SICK looking spot, Umaga falls forward and Cena’s head apparently slams into the steps being crushed by Umaga’s fatness. That’s just as painful looking. On a second look it might have landed on the part of the steps with nothing there but still it looked great. That gets 9 and also a LOUD Cena sucks chant. After taking another beating, Cena hulks up but takes a Samoan Drop to put him back down. I really hate the Spike.

It was just freaking stupid on so many levels that it’s unreal. Seriously, look at Umaga and the stuff he does, and then his finishing move is a thumb to the neck. That’s just freaking DUMB. Ross calls Umaga Youmaga, so maybe that’s where Regal got that from. He hits the post so Cena nails him with a monitor as Umaga decides to take a nap there I guess.

Cena is bleeding from the step crushing by the way. We hit the floor so Cena hits post. The no selling by Umaga is getting a bit annoying but it’s quite bearable. At least they have their stereotypes right here as nothing is hurting his head. With Cena draped over the announce tables, Umaga gets a running start and runs down the tables to go for a splash on Cena which of course misses.

I’m glad as if Cena had gotten up from that it would have been completely ridiculous. That gets a LONG 9 which the fans boo the heck out of. For some reason Lawler thinks you have to be in the ring to answer the ten, which is just stupid but it’s Lawler so it’s expected. Estrada gets some metal thing and takes the ring apart to hand Umaga the turnbuckle, as in the part that hooks up to the post. Of course Cena ducks and hits an FU.

Thankfully he’s up before the referee starts counting as it would have been ridiculous if he stayed down. However it gets dumber as after a metal shot puts him down, Cena puts the STFU on Umaga using the ropes to choke him out.

For some reason Umaga completely no sells the first attempt and is up almost immediately after Cena lets go but Cena does it again to keep him down for ten in what I would assume was miscommunication. That’s your lesson for the day kids: it’s ok to take a rope and tie it around a guy’s neck for about 20 seconds until he stops moving and breathing, as long as you keep your title!

Rating: C. This was about as much of a textbook example of a last man standing match as you could have asked for. What I mean by that is that it was about as safe of one as you were going to get. I don’t think anyone bought that Umaga was a legit threat to the belt so take that for what it’s worth.

The match is certainly ok, but it’s little more than that, which I guess is to be expected in something like this. It ended this rivalry though and gave Cena another successful title defense so that makes up for some stuff I suppose. Not bad, but not great at all.

Commercial for Mania.

Flair draws his number.

Royal Rumble

Lillian is amazing, period. Flair is first, continuing his horrific run of luck for Rumble draws as this is the 3rd time that I can think of where he draws in the first 3 spots. Finlay is number two which is certainly an odd pairing. History is altered again as Flair has now not made it an hour in 1992, despite according to Monsoon making it about 70 minutes that year. We have 90 second intervals here in case you were wondering.

Cole makes it sound like this is for the title. It’s not, which is why it’s a bad idea. Kenny Dykstra, who allegedly was a great talent which I never saw, is 3rd. He and Flair were feuding I think. He was a year old when the first Rumble happened. That’s just scary as Flair was like a 5 time world champion back then. Finlay is heel here in case you were wondering. Matt Hardy is 4th. Lawler, JBL and Cole are doing the commentary here.

Since there’s no JR they can actually get words in edgewise. JBL says this is the closest thing in wrestling to an endurance contest. Other than you know, the iron man match which is an endurance contest. Edge is 5th. The first five have been Raw Smackdown Raw Smackdown Raw. That’s rather odd. Flair goes through the ropes and goes to get a chair. He and Edge have been feuding for awhile too. Does no one like Flair?

Flair goes out and then Dykstra follows him as Dreamer is 6th. You know what the chant is already. Finlay knocks everyone down and oddly enough is dominating. JBL says Lawler hid for 30 minutes in 1996 because he thought there was a young woman under the ring. That actually made me laugh. Sabu of all people is 7th. Naturally he gets a table which Cole says he’s made a career out of.

That’s either a thinly veiled insult or a general observation. Given that it’s Cole, I’d say it’s the later as I don’t think he’s intelligent enough to know how to thinly veil something. He makes up for it by knowing all of Sabu’s attributes which is actually impressive. Helms is Gregory Helms, still the Cruiserweight Champion that he became last year. We have Finlay, Hardy, Edge, Dreamer, Sabu and Helms at the moment.

We get our second Sabu chant in less than three minutes which makes me shake my head very hard. Helms has been wanting to stop being a cruiserweight at the time. In other words he wants to have a career. Shelton is 9th. They tease about 4 people going through the table but no one goes through it. Lawler points out that if used right it could save someone, which is actually true.

Kane gets us to double digits and of course we hear about all of his records, including most consecutive rumbles and 11 guys thrown out. And yet he can’t get a 4 week world title reign. Dreamer and Sabu are tossed easily, with Sabu being chokeslammed through the table. Well at least they made it quick. CM PUNK is 11th. Good night I hate how far they’ve depushed him lately.

He was supposed to have a twenty minute war with Lashley to end the Elimination Chamber at December 2 Dismember so that both guys would be made at once. Heyman thought that up. Punk was also supposed to make Show tap out in that match in about 5 minutes. Show, who was losing the title to Lashley anyway, had no problem with that and since he would be leaving in two days anyway had no problem putting Punk over really strong on his way out.

Vince of course HATED this and had RVD pin him first, leaving the likes of Test and Hardcore Holly, you know, REAL MAIN EVENT GUYS to battle it out instead. Naturally the fans HATED this as Punk was incredibly over and no one wanted to see Holly and Test in a main event. Vince of course blamed Heyman and he was fired as a result.

Punk would get the ECW Title in October and begin the biggest launch in company history, breaking the record for fastest time to win the Triple Crown, with the ECW title thrown in as a bonus. He has since tapped to Cena in 2 minutes at the Slammies and who knows what else as we’re 9 days from Christmas when this is being written and you’ll read it in about 5 weeks.

King Booker is 12th, about ten months before jumping to TNA. He puts Helms out in about 4 seconds. Super Crazy is 13th. Nothing happens. Jeff Hardy is 14th and hopefully something happens here. The Hardys of course work together and hook a move called the Spin Cycle on Crazy before fighting Kane which I like for some reason that I don’t understand.

Sandman, to a song that sounds nothing like Metallica is 15th. He gets a great cane shot to Jeff and a few others but Booker puts him out in about 15 seconds. Thanks for that. Orton is 16th. He and Edge, the tag champions, put out Crazy and the Hardys inside of a minute. In at 17 is Benoit, in his final Rumble. He’s US Champion here because that’s all he’s ever done. The announcers talk about Punk like he’s a jobber or something.

Oh I forgot he was on ECW at the time. RVD is 18th, just about to be gone from the company. He would be gone I think in June. Kane puts Booker out so he goes back in and puts Kane out. They fought at No Way Out and that was the end of it. They fight for awhile until Viscera comes out at 19th. He’s wearing white pajamas so there we are. Nitro is 20th. Nothing of note is going on here.

More or less it’s just a lot of guys making sure that they get close to being thrown out without actually doing so. Kevin Thorn, the guy that just never got pushed is 21st. Shelton gets insanely close and keeps off the floor which is indeed impressive. Oh for the love of heck Hardcore Holly is 22nd. Still, nothing of note is happening with far too many people in the ring at the moment.

Shawn Michaels, still of DX, is 23rd to blow the roof off the place. With EVERYONE else trying to get Viscera out, Shawn puts Finlay out. A superkick to Viscera allows everyone else to put him out. He puts Shelton out too. They actually imply that Holly could win as Masters is 24th. I’ve actually liked his face turn recently, and not just because I find him attractive. Nitro is out thanks to Benoit.

Oh yeah HHH is out with an injury again and wouldn’t be back until Summerslam. Chavo is 25th as this is somehow only his 3rd Rumble ever. Benoit puts Thorn out. I’ve spelled his name wrong both times I’ve mentioned him in here. MVP is 26th and he’s not quite a medium sized deal yet. He and Kennedy had been feuding with Kane and Taker. Masters is out. Every time Van Dam has been in the Rumble, he’s made the final 6. That’s not bad at all.

Carlito is 27th which is where 4 men have won from which is rather impressive. Shawn hangs on like someone that hangs on rather impressively. Khali is 28th and he’ll likely get rid of a bunch of people. Yep, there goes Benoit and Holly. He would win the world title in July once Edge got hurt…again. He chops the tar out of everyone and Miz is 29th. Good night did he ever come a LONG way since then. He has the same music too. Yeah he’s gone in 5 seconds.

Van Dam is out. Punk is the 5th in a row for him. Carlito is number 6. Chavo makes 7. They say that no one can beat Khali as Shawn beats on him to no avail. I think it’s about as obvious as possible who 30th is here, but it’s going to be awesome no matter what. Cole: “no one can stop Khali.” JBL: “we have our Wrestlemania main event.” Lawler: “if I were number 30 I’d have second thoughts. GONG! All three: “OH YES!” Taker power walks to the ring and it’s on.

Final group: Khali, Taker, Shawn, Orton, Edge, MVP.They slug it out and after a bad clothesline, Khali is out. Somehow Taker looks small next to him, and that’s just scary. Since Khali wiped everyone out, we have 5 people left: MVP, never mind he’s gone so the final four are Shawn, Taker, Edge and Orton. They really are getting good at this final four thing.

Orton pops Taker with a chair and Rated RKO double team him. Edge of course goes for the double cross and this somehow allows Shawn to take an RKO. Taker is bleeding. We get a mini handicap match with quite a few chair shots in there. Ok it’s more like two but whatever. They go for a conchairto but Shawn comes in for the save and the double elimination to set up the old school explosion.

Both guys are down though, and you know what’s coming. Taker sits up, and then Shawn nips up a few seconds later. Lawler says he isn’t sure if this has ever happened before. Oh I give up. We get my favorite Taker spot as he throws Shawn into the corner. The fans are way into this. This turns into of course a great one on one match. They fight on the apron with Taker showing off by barely hanging on much like Shawn would do.

They go back and forth with some great stuff as neither guy can keep the advantage. Shawn gets ahead for awhile but Chine Music is blocked to set up a chokeslam. Tombstone doesn’t work though and Taker gets kicked in the face. He goes for a second one, but Taker moves and puts Shawn out, to become the first guy from the 30th spot to win the thing.

That’s not great odds for the luckiest spot in the match. Taker poses for a LONG time to end the show, which is fine. The fans are uh, not thrilled with Taker putting out Shawn when he was that close to winning, and Shawn was in the main event of Mania anyway so it makes even less sense.

Rating: B. The ending makes this whole thing as they let the old guys go out there and prove that old school is better than the young guys. Having the two mini matches at the end was a nice little touch. There were far too many dead spots in there though which screwed things up.

The lineup ws good though and it was nice to see the ECW guys not really do much as they didn’t need to, other than Punk. This was fine though and the ending was great so that helps a lot. It could have been better, but I liked it.

Overall Rating: B. While nothing here is great, there’s only one bad match in the ECW Title match which at least is short. This kind of sums up the company as a whole around this time: not bad at all but nothing that jumps off the page that’s great. Taker would go on to win his second world title at Mania, ending the run there against Evolution by beating Batista.

When you think about it, you realize how freaking insane the Streak really is. Anyway, this was a pretty good show but not great. If you like the modern WWE you’ll like it and vice versa, so there you go.