Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1995 (2013 Redo): Save Us Shawn. Again.

Summerslam 1995
Date: August 27, 1995
Location: Pittsburgh Civic Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 18,062
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

Hakushi vs. 1-2-3 Kid

The Kid is still a face here and is starting to look someone older. Hakushi is a Japanese guy who is covered in individual characters, even on his face. Feeling out process to start as they fight over a top wristlock. The Kid backflips out of a wristlock and armdrags Hakushi across the ring to take him down. Things speed up with the Kid hip tossing him down but being kicked off by Hakushi into a stalemate. They run the ropes again but both hold a rope and try superkicks but neither can connect.

Hakushi goes to the throat as Vince calls the show SummerSlime. A tilt-a-whirl slam puts the Kid down and Hakushi poses on the ropes for a few long moments. Hakushi hits a Vader Bomb for two and Vince thinks the match should be stopped. The Kid is sent to the floor and Hakushi hits a gorgeous moonsault from the mat to the floor followed by a top rope shoulder block for two back inside. A swan dive misses though and Kid sends him to the floor for a dive of his own. Back in and a slingshot legdrop gets two and a frog splash gets the same. The Kid tries a spin kick but gets caught in a quick powerbomb for the pin.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Bob Holly

We go split screen to see the British Bulldog arriving but he has nothing to say. Helmsley hooks an abdominal stretch but has to hiptoss Holly over the top after he counters. Holly comes back with some dropkicks and some jobber level offense including a backdrop. He tries a second one though and gets caught in a Pedigree for the pin.

Blue Brothers vs. Smoking Gunns

The Gunns get a near fall off some double teaming but Billy walks into an H Bomb (double powerbomb) to stop the momentum dead. Eli puts Billy in the Tree of Woe but tags in Jacob instead of doing anything about it. Jacob draws in Bart to allow for more double teaming and Eli gets two off a powerslam. Billy comes back with a face plant to Jacob and makes the tag off to Bart. Everything breaks down and the Blus are sent into each other, allowing the Gunns to hit the Sidewinder (side slam/guillotine legdrop) on Eli for the pin.

Barry Horowitz vs. Skip

Dean Douglas calls the last match a travesty.

Blayze is defending and Faye is this rather frumpy fat chick designed to be disturbing. She also has Harvey Whippelman with him as her worshiping admirer. Alundra fires off some quickly kicks to start and the 280lb or so Faye runs her over in response. A bad looking hair pull sends Blayze down and some legdrops get two. Bertha misses a middle rope splash and a victory roll gets two for the champion. Three clotheslines get no count for Alundra as Harvey has the referee. Some middle rope dropkicks stagger Bertha but she avoids a third before hitting a Batista Bomb for the title.

Taker says Kama went too far.

Undertaker vs. Kama

Kama is more famous as Godfather and is the Supreme Fighting Machine here, which is kind of an MMA gimmick. Taker pounds away in the corner to start before choking Kama down, only to be kicked in the back when he looks at the casket. Taker knocks Kama over the top and onto the casket to freak him out before hitting a quick splash in the corner. Old School connects and Kama is thrown into the casket but pops right back out. A top rope clothesline puts Taker down for a second but he sits right back up.

Taker finally fights up but gets whipped into the corner to stop him cold again. The jumping clothesline puts Kama down and a regular clothesline puts him inside the casket, but Undertaker falls in with him and the lid closes. Kama fights out again and hits a neckbreaker in the ring to put the Dead Man down again. Not that it matters as Taker stands up, hits the chokeslam and tombstone and throws Kama into the casket for the win.

Lawler did what he does best: got somebody else to fight his battles for him. He went out and got someone else to fight for him. He got a dentist. Yankem was a demented tooth fairy.”

Isaac Yankem vs. Bret Hart

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

This is the second ladder match and Shawn is defending. Michaels is over like free beer in a frat house at this point so Razor is the heel by default. The original plan was Shawn vs. Sid but I guess Vince decided to give the show one awesome match to go with the rest of the drek. Also Doc Hendrix is on commentary now. Vince says you would have to be Andre the Giant with a jetpack on your back to reach the belt. SOMEBODY MAKE THAT MOVIE NOW!!!

Razor hands Shawn the belt post match and reaffirms his face status.

WWF World Title: King Mabel vs. Diesel

Ratings Comparison

Hakushi vs. 1-2-3 Kid

Original: B

Redo: C+

Bob Holly vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Original: D+

Redo: D

Smoking Guns vs. Blu Brothers

Original: D

Redo: D

Skip vs. Barry Horowitz

Original: B

Redo: D+

Alundra Blayze vs. Bertha Faye

Original: D+

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Kama

Original: B-

Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Isaas Yankem

Original: B-

Redo: C

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B+

Redo: A

King Mabel vs. Diesel

Original: F+

Redo: F

Overall Rating

Original: F

Redo: D

The original had higher individual ratings but the overall rating was lower. I really was bad at this.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/29/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1995-worst-ppv-ever-pretty-much/

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1995 (Original): Bret Fights A Dentist

Summerslam 1995
Date: August 27, 1995
Location: Pittsburgh Civic Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 18,062
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

We’re in the In Your House era now and if you’ve read my reviews of the earlier ones, you know what my thoughts are on the booking that was going on in this era. If you haven’t, go read them now you lazy jerks. Dang people trying to just read what comes later and avoid all of the intellectual labor. Anyway, we’re in 1995 and the business is at a seemingly dead end.

No one really knows where to go right now and it would take Hogan’s shocking turn in about 11 months to change everything. Hall and Nash are clearly almost on their way out at this point, which is interesting as they’re both in the singles title matches tonight. Now if you want proof that the business has no idea where to go, think about it. We’re at the point now where your big matches are a rematch of what was a big deal….a year and a half ago, and Diesel vs. Mabel.

Yes, that’s your main event: Diesel vs. Mabel. Bret Hart is fighting an evil dentist, and Barry Horowitz has a match on a pay per view. Think about that for a few minutes while we dig into what is considered one of the worst PPVs ever, Summerslam 1995. Side note: Nitro debuted 8 days after this.

Standard intro talking about the two big matches. Oh and Shawn is a face now. In the back we have Dean Douglas who is critiquing the matches tonight. For those of you that don’t know, Douglas was Matt Striker done properly.

1-2-3 Kid vs. Hakushi

Apparently Kid is from Minnesota, Minneapolis which is a place that’s known for it’s cheap heat. Yeah that joke makes no sense to me either so just go with it. Kid more or less botches jumping into the ring so he must have gotten genuine Columbian cocaine today. Hakushi lost a match to Barry Horowitz earlier in the day so take that for what it’s worth. This is actually a pretty good match so far with some very nice back and forth stuff going on.

Waltman really isn’t that bad against other cruiserweights. The heel is completely dominating as we have a lot of smarks in the crowd who are cheering him. He’d turn face soon enough so that’s all well and good. Lawler insults the Kid and the Pittsburgh fans, which isn’t really that hard to do. He sends Kid to the floor with a SWEET looking back kick. Kid makes his comeback which is actually pretty good. It’s a lot of interesting looking high flying stuff that works really well for someone of his size etc.

Eventually he goes for a spinwheel kick and gets caught in a suplex/powerbomb kind of move for the pin. I really like that ending as it made sense to have Kid keep going for bigger and bigger moves before finally getting caught. That’s a nice little touch to end on.

Rating: B. This was a very solid opener I thought. It was fast paced and exciting as both guys were jumping all over the place and it just flowed really well. The fans were into it which isn’t saying much as this is a very hot crowd to say the least. Good choice for an opener.

In the back, Mabel says that he won’t tell Doc what his surprise is for later.

HHH vs. Bob Holly

Holly is still the racecar guy here while it’s still very early in HHH’s WWF career. He’s been here about 4 months at this time so this is easily his biggest match to date against his toughest opponent. Lawler says that HHH is the kind of guy that eats Kentucky Fried Quail. Is that an insult or a compliment? Anyway, there’s a natural heel thing about HHH that works so well with this blueblood character.

Just about everyone that he would face would have a culture clash with him because who doesn’t hate some rich guy that thinks he’s better than you? BREAKING NEWS! The British Bulldog is here! This is apparently shocking and terrible as he turned heel last week, attacking Diesel. How can something like this happen? A WWF wrestler that’s a pretty big star coming to a WWF event? Yes folks, anything can happen in the WWF, even a guy coming to work.

We of course go split screen to show Smith walking. Oh my goodness, get these people an Emmy blast it! Even being the rich guy vs. the redneck, this is a very boring match. There’s no drama to it at all as Holly just isn’t that good and HHH doesn’t know how good he is yet. Imagine telling Vince back then that HHH would not only be a ten time world champion but also his son in law and the heir to the throne. After about 8 minutes of pure boredom, HHH wins with a not yet perfected pedigree.

Rating: D+. This is just flat out boring. No one wanted to see it and it’s more or less a glorified squash match. Where’s the fun in that? In my eyes, there’s very little indeed. Seriously, why was this on Summerslam again? Did they not have anything better that they could have put on here? They spent half the time talking about Smith so even the announcers didn’t care.

We see a video talking about the WWF vs. Pittsburgh firefighters in a tug of war for some charity thing. Bam Bam, Mabel, Henry Godwin and Savio? Something just doesn’t fit in there. It’s for charity so I can’t make any jokes about it really.

Smoking Guns vs. Blu Brothers

Blu Brothers were later known as DOA, Creative Control, Harris Brothers and I think the Bruise Brothers. They’re twins so this works really well s it’s easy to get heel heat by just switching. The Cowboys are just flat out boring. They’re ok in the ring but DANG they’re bland.

This is pretty much a tag version of the previous match as no one is interested and it feels like a weak house show match. It’s about 5 minutes long and is just a heel domination leading to the hot tag and the faces hitting the Sidewinder to end it. That’s all there is to it and no one could care less at all.

Rating: D. This was even worse than HHH’s match as it just doesn’t fit on Summerslam at all. It’s a bland match that feels like it belongs at a house show on its best day. Why would someone want to pay for something like this?

Barry Horowitz vs. Skip

This is actually kind of a cool story. Horowitz for those of you that don’t know is one of the biggest jobbers of all time, ranking up there with the Brooklyn Brawler. He hadn’t won a match in years yet somehow kept a job. Anyway, one night he pinned Skip when he wasn’t paying attention. A week later he somehow gets credit for another win after going to a time limit draw. For some reason, that warrants a match here at Summerslam.

Can someone explain to me why this is happening and not maybe a tag title match? It’s the second biggest show of the year, Raw has long since been established as the A show, and In Your House has debuted. Do we really need to give these guys, a relative newcomer and a jobber time on Summerslam, but not the world tag team titles? Sunny is Skip’s manager and I’m convinced she’s an alien. No human could be that hot.

Anyway, they start hot as Barry is wearing suspenders to go with his tights. They’re gone in about 8 seconds so what was the point of them? This is actually a pretty good match with some nice technical stuff. Sunny is sent to the back, causing 75% of male viewers to change the channel. For some reason she doesn’t leave which is a good thing. Candido is impressing me actually. His offense is very crisp and sharp with no botches or anything like that.

He passed away at only 33 and he was already an established veteran so he would certainly still be active today. Skip hits his diving headbutt finisher but pulls him up at the last second which even Lawler says is a bad idea. As he’s doing this, for no apparent reason, Hakushi comes out and distracts Skip. This allows Horowitz to roll him up for the small package while Skip’s hand is very close to Barry’s package.

Rating: B. This was a very good match. The story was fine and the in ring work was very good. There’s no noticeable botches or anything like that and you get an excellent feel good moment. However, I have to ask again: is this more important than a tag title match? Even a squash tag match would be fine, but there’s no need to have these two get 10 minutes plus at Summerslam.

Dean Douglas says that Horowitz didn’t deserve to win.

Todd says that Barry should have won and shows a short clip from the ladder match. Shawn comes in and says he’ll win no matter what.

Women’s Title: Bertha Faye vs. Alundra Blayze

Now THIS is one of the weirdest characters of all time. Weighing in at 230 pounds, Faye was just an ugly fat woman that Harvey Whippleman was in love with. She wore a skirt that showed her underwear and was fat. That’s about it. What was the point or thought behind this character? We’ve been trying to figure that out ever sense. Her song was called Sweet Loving Arms if that tells you anything. They did everything they could to make Blayze a big deal and it just never worked once.

This is a pretty short match which is likely good. Blayze of course knows some martial arts because every diva is skilled with them right? How many women use a kick as a major point of their offense?

Anyway, Alundra (how odd of a name is that anyway?) hits a bunch of kicks and big moves but she can’t beat the big fat chick, leading to the worst sitout powerbomb of all time and as the champion gets her shoulder up at 2, the three comes down and we have a new champion. She and Harvey celebrate in the aisle after the match.

Rating: D+. Oy vey this was bad. Neither was incredibly skilled in this match, which wasn’t fair as both could actually wrestle pretty well. Faye was a comedy character and Blayze would get the belt back in about two months or so. This was a waste of time though and wasn’t entertaining at all.

Recap of Taker vs. Kama, which was a pretty bad feud. Kama, aka the Godfather, stole his urn at Mania and made it into a necklace. He then beat up the creatures of the night, causing this to become a casket match. They did this at an In Your House show as a dark match which wasn’t that good. This has more time and is on a bigger stage, so maybe this is better.

Paul Bearer and Taker say Kama is in trouble.

Casket Match: Kama vs. Undertaker

Kama still works for DiBiase at this point. Hmm Taker in a violent gimmick match in Pittsburgh. Same thing happened later on in the Mankind Cell match. Kama of course isn’t afraid, as no heel has been in forever. Well at least in the beginning this is far better. What this should be is more or less Kozlov vs. Taker, and that’s what we’re getting. Kama is hammering him with big power strikes and Taker is absorbing them.

Kama is showing fear of the coffin so we’re getting inside his head too. This is light years ahead of what we had last month at In Your House. Taker goes to the floor and DiBiase kicks at him, leading to Bearer taking his jacket off to fight Ted. That is something I’d pay to see. Ted having been retired for awhile and likely out of shape vs. Paul Bearer. Oh my goodness that would be funny.

Kama suplexes him onto the closed casket. I can’t imagine a back injury in a casket match with Taker can you? The Rest In Peace chant really is awesome here. This is kind of standard Taker stuff, which means that it’s going just fine. Taker gets beaten down, then makes his comeback.

They both go inside the big wooden box at the same time and Kama crawls out, giving us the dragging him back under visual that Shawn made famous at the 98 Rumble. Eventually it’s tombstone and the dark box for Kama to give Taker the win.

Rating: B-. I was liking this. Kama is the perfect kind of heel to feed to Taker. He’s big and strong with good fighting skills, which makes it easy for Taker to fight him off and look good doing it. This was a long feud for Taker but no one really put much thought into it. All it really was supposed to do was keep him busy until he could move onto something big, which he did as he started feuding with Mable for a few months before moving on to Diesel soon after that.

We hit the recap button on Bret vs. Isaac Yankem, who is just an agent of Lawler to try to fight Bret. Some of the lines by Todd here are great. “Lawler did what he does best: got somebody else to fight his battles for him.” “He went out and got someone else to fight for him. He got a dentist.”

“Yankem was a demented tooth fairy.” You know, for all that Bret and Kane have done for the WWF, this might be their best stuff. Think about it: Kane is a crazed dentist which sounds like a bad horror movie. Wow, See No Evil 2 here we come! Anyway, Bret is the guy that has to fight a crazed dentist. How over the top can you get?

Bret Hart vs. Isaac Yankem

Isaac is from Decatur, Illinois. That just sounds funny to me for some reason. Hart says he’s tired of Lawler, and asks if a chiropractor is next. That made me laugh. No sweet leather jacket for Hart which sucks. This is another good matchup for Hart as he’s against a big guy that he can take down after getting beaten up. That’s a nice thing to get going which always works well. Taker is apparently on the Superstar line. That’s just a funny thing to imagine.

Crowd is WAY into Bret here. This is a pretty good back and forth match for the early part as they hammer on each other with Bret slowly breaking Isaac down but Kane hitting a power move to stop Bret dead in his tracks. Eventually the big guy takes over and works Bret into the ground pretty well. Bret has a sweet counter for this neck pull move that’s hard to describe. Basically Bret back flips out of it. It’s really cool looking.

The referee grabs Isaac by the hair and pulls him away which is just not smart. It makes the wrestler look bad because a referee is manhandling them and it’s just not professional. You can hear that Vince is seriously pissed off over it. Yep he’s fired. Anyway, this is mainly over the kiss my foot match that Lawler and Hart had where Lawler had to kiss not only Bret’s foot but his own.

He says it was like kissing a hog with halitosis, which is horrible. Also, Lawler sells sea shells by the seashore for six cents on Saturdays. They’re on the floor for awhile which is just more time for Hart to get beaten up as Isaac looks good. Kane even does a very short walk of the top rope to land a leg drop to the back of Bret’s head as he was hanging over the top rope.

DAng why hasn’t he done that since? Wow has Kane really been in the WWF nearly 15 years? That’s almost hard to believe if you think about it. Finally Hart has had ENOUGH and throws a suicide dive and beats the heck out of Isaac. Sharpshooter leads to Lawler helping Isaac get out which he more or less had to do. He’s now a manager instead of a commentator so Vince is on his own.

Oh this isn’t going to go well. Brea beats on him for a bit, drawing a mad pop from the crowd, but allowing Kane to hit a double axe from the top to save the King. Lawler eventually grabs Bret’s foot and tries to pull him out as Isaac helps him. This causes the referee to FINALLY DQ them after counting to six. They hang Bret between the top and middle ropes and pull on him which has to hurt badly.

Instead of just going in reverse of what got Bret in that position, the suits that run down decide to shove Bret’s head through the ropes, hurting him even worse. Did they not pay attention to Foley losing an ear in a similar thing? Oh he’s fine though. Being this close to Canada gives Bret his super human powers. It’s kind of like the sun with Superman, but Bret could take him in Canada.

Rating: B-. This was pretty good, but it was in essence a handicap match. While that’s all well and good, this should have been Bret vs. Lawler for one big and final blowoff match, maybe in a cage. Yeah I think that would have worked just fine. Kane was a good enough choice, but the focus was more on Lawler, which hurt things a bit. Either way, the stuff in the ring was very good and this was a solid 15 or so minute match.

IC Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

No transition here or anything at all other than the Razor promo. It’s the rematch of the ladder match. It doesn’t need much of an explanation so there we go. Shawn climbs the ladder in the aisle to stare down Razor which is a semi-famous image, or at least it was back then. Vince telling someone to get down is just wrong on so many levels.

They raise up the belt which is something you don’t often see. Doc Hendrix jumps in on commentary. Vince says that you would have to be Andre the Giant with a jetpack to reach the belt. Or you could just get a ladder but who am I to argue. Doc offers up a surprising stat: only once in Summerslam history up to that point, in 1993, did the IC Title not change hands. Hey he’s good for something.

Shawn says lift it up and there’s the bell. They slug it out to start and both guys escape finishers. Shawn is knocked to the floor and then stops Razor from getting the ladder. Why? Shawn has to bring it back also doesn’t he? Razor blocks Shawn’s suplex and suplexes him to the floor. I love that move. Not sure why but I always have. Either that or it just sounds good and I’m trying to fill in space.

Both finishers miss again and we get a double clothesline to give them a breather. Razor gets to the ladder which is enough for Vince to say he’ll win. Sid, the guy that gets the winner, is watching in the back. Shawn gets the ladder and control but it’s not like the match is ending anytime soon so the drama isn’t there at all.

Down goes the ladder and Shawn and he might have hurt his knee. Oh that’s funny. Shawn’s knee never gets hurt. The fans aren’t sure if they like what Razor is doing here or not. Shawn is more or less dead and falls as Razor tries to send him into the ladder. This is a much more psychological based match than before but they have some experience this time so that might have something to do with it.

Razor has been dominating for a good while here. No attempt at going for the belt yet though which doesn’t really surprise me. Lots of leg work which is logical. Shawn manages to send Razor to the floor but another knee shot takes away any kind of advantage Shawn may have gotten. Razor is wrestling heel here and it’s working pretty well. Granted that’s his natural style so it’s easy for him.

He goes up but Shawn literally makes a diving save to send him down. Doc declares this the greatest match he’s ever seen. It’s good but seriously, the best you’ve ever seen? That might be a stretch dude. Then again given how many drugs he probably did this might be the only match he can remember seeing. Shawn suplexes Razor off the ladder and everyone is down.

Razor eats ladder in the corner and Shawn takes over. Shawn goes up and hits a moonsault press. It kind of misses but it was close enough to still look ok. A splash from the top of the ladder misses and everyone is down. They slug it out on dop of the ladder and a headbutt from Razor sends both guys flying down. Doc says Ted and Sid have to be dancing in the streets. Or they could be watching in the bac on a monitor but same thing I guess.

Shawn charges with the ladder but goes through the ropes to the floor. Razor is like screw this and gets a second ladder. He finally gets the Edge off the ladder and both guys are down again. If there’s one criticism here it’s that they’re staying down for too many long stretches of time. Granted I can totally understand them needing a break.

Vince wants to know which one is the legal ladder. Is there a ladder checking team that I’m not aware of? Both guys climb up a ladder at the same time and Shawn gets more or less Sweet Chin Music to knock Razor off. And then like an IDIOT he jumps at the belt and misses completely, crashing down onto the mat. Shawn sends him to the floor and climbs again, getting his hands on the belt but just not grabbing it. He goes up again and gets it so I’d think the second one was just a slip or something.

Rating: B+. While not as good as their initial match, this is indeed an excellent one. The problem here is simple: how do you follow the greatest gimmick match of all time to that point, especially with the same two guys in it? Every spot you can look at and say it was better the first time or that wasn’t as good as the one you did last year.

That’s the issue they’re facing here, so while this is good, by comparison it just isn’t as solid of a match, which can mainly be attributed to the expectations they had coming into this match I think.

In the back Dean Douglas has a few choice words to say about the “Bad Guy”. This leads to Ramon coming in and beating him up, kickstarting their feud which would actually be Ramon’s last in the company before heading to WCW.

\WWF Title: Diesel vs. Mabel

Please help me get through this. Mabel won the KOTR because Vince got really high one night and decided he wanted to see how well he could screw up Summerslam, so he gives us this. Let’s see, how many other options were there that are better than this? Maybe every single person on the roster? Are you telling me you couldn’t have thrown someone like Owen Hart maybe in there? He would have at least given a decent match.

The problem here is simple: Mabel is too freaking fat for Diesel to muscle around like he’s always done, and it’s going to throw Diesel off his game. Therefore, you have a champion off his game and a big man that can’t do crap. Does this sound like a good equation to anyone at all? Mabel comes to the ring as KOTR with Sir Mo. Oh yes I can see the greatness so clearly here. Vince talks about how Bulldog and Luger are here.

Ooh, why did we not have either of those as a good main event? Oh I remember. We had to use that at In Your House instead of here where it would actually matter. Luger of course would be back in WCW 8 freaking days later after infamously having been in WWF one night and debuting for WCW the next night on the debut episode of Nitro, which when you think about it is absolutely brilliant and an amazing move.

Mabel looks like an idiot with that crown. In case you can’t tell, I hate this freaking match. We keep hearing about the royal plan. Oh yes, Mabel is clearly an evil genius. Give me a break Vince. Mabel starts on offense and Diesel gets beaten up. Soon thereafter we switch that up and put Mabel on offense as I have my family hide all sharp or blunt objects to keep me from hurting myself.

Shockingly enough, Diesel can’t do much other than punch and clothesline him, mainly because it’s the only offense he can use without getting a hernia. Oh yeah, Mabel is wearing his shiny purple and gold ensemble here. Mable eventually gets back in control and as I was waiting on, he sits on Diesel. He puts his hands on Nash’s face but doesn’t pull back, yet somehow it’s called a chinlock.

This goes on for EIGHTY FOUR SECONDS. Yes, I get that Mable needs a rest in there as after 5 minutes someone of his gravitational pull would get tired. HOWEVER, a minute and a half is WAY too much to have a fat guy sitting on his opponent. That’s all he’s doing: high impact sitting. Moe comes in of course and gets beaten up. Apparently this is the great and mighty royal plan: get your manager/tag partner/fellow homeless guy to beat on Diesel.

Oh my lord my feeble brain can’t comprehend such intricate and complex thoughts! Luger runs in for the save as I think the referee has sought out psychiatric help after having to stand out there and put up with this nonsense for ten minutes. Oh wait here’s part 2 of the plan: a leg drop on the floor! Luger beats up Moe, proving that he’s indeed smarter than a 5th grader.

The referee returns from rehab long enough to count a two on Diesel. Mabel jumps off the second rope in his attempt to change the rotation of the Earth but misses a splash. This combined with what’s called a clothesline from the second rope but is more Diesel jumping on Mable lead to the slowest count of all time and a succ…..a succ… I’m sorry but there was nothing successful about this match at all. Diesel keeps the belt let’s go with that. He poses with the belt to close us out.

Rating: F+. Do I really need to explain this one any further? I hate this match and I hate Nelson Frazier, who is easily one of the worst “wrestlers” of all time in my eyes.

Overall Rating: F. This was a hard one for me, but overall the good moments of this show just can’t get out from underneath the epicness of the nonsense on the card. Hakushi/Kid and Horowitz/Skip are actually quite good matches. I was impressed with them. However, there is no way you can justify having those two plus HHH and the Guns’ squashes all be on this show.

You have a 9 match card and I could see at the very most, four belonging on a major show: the opener because you simply need a hot opener to set the stage which that one certainly meets the requirements for, the Hart/Isaac match, Taker and Kama, and the ladder match. Of the two in the middle, they could have easily been altered to put Hart and Lawler together. The second and third matches are just wastes of time, plain and simple.

The HHH match I can kind of see the point in as it gives an up and coming star a PPV match to get himself over. I can almost come to validate that one, but not by much. The Guns’ match however has no business on a PPV, none. The next match was one of the best in ring matches of the night, but I ask again: WHY IS BARRY HOROWITZ WRESTLING AT SUMMERSLAM???

Women’s match was bad but since it’s a title match it can be justified I suppose, and then the main event I’ve already vented on. I’m sorry, but an opener, a ladder match that’s an inferior version of a match from a year and a half ago and two above average midcard matches simply are not enough to sell a PPV for me.

This show is just a flat out failure. It has its moments and would have been passable as a much lower level show, but this is unacceptable as the second biggest show of the year, which is saying how bad WWF was at this time when you had this and Mania 11, perhaps the worst of all time, as your big shows. This was horrible.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Daily News Update – July 26, 2021

Find Out How Bad Raw Can Get!

 

Monday Night Raw Star Has Coronavirus, Out Two Weeks.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/monday-night-raw-star-coronavirus-two-weeks/

FULL WrestleMania Match: John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt From WrestleMania 30.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/full-wrestlemania-match-john-cena-vs-bray-wyatt-wrestlemania-30/

Surprising Former WWE Star Tells Of Bullying Great Khali.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/surprising-former-wwe-star-tells-bullying-great-khali/

WATCH: AEW Star Gets Engaged In The Ring.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/watch-aew-star-gets-engaged-ring/

RUMOR: CM Punk Signing With AEW Shakes Up Daniel Bryan Plans.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/rumor-cm-punk-signing-aew-shakes-daniel-bryan-plans/

WWE RUMOR: More Changes May Be Coming For Karrion Kross.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/wwe-rumor-changes-may-coming-karrion-kross/

As always, please check out all of the videos if you can, hit up the comments section and get on the Wrestling Rumors Facebook page.




Took In The WWE SuperShow

For the first time in far too long, I got to take in a live wrestling show on Sunday night. This was one of the WWE SuperShows, featuring both Monday Night Raw and Smackdown wrestlers. It was also part of the Summer of Cena, with Cena in a six man main event. The announcement that Cena would be on the show made the ticket sales jump, including two extra sections being opened up the day of the show. Yeah there’s something to the guy. Let’s get to it.

This was one of the largest crowds I can remember for a Louisville show, with about 6,000 tickets sold. The show started just after 7pm so they were on time.

We got a quick video of Bianca Belair arriving and being glad to have fans back. Carmella interrupted and they bickered a bit.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Belair got a heck of a reaction and you can tell how over she is with the younger fans. They have something with her and I think they know that. This was a basic match with Belair doing the athletic stuff with the power and flips while Carmella was mostly left with the cheating. There was a notable moment where Carmella went down in the corner as Belair was trying to jump over her. I had seen on Twitter that Carmella might have had some issues staying in her top (which I didn’t notice live), but she might have gone down to cover things up. Belair retained at 11:45 with a small package to a very strong pop. C.

Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre

This was a non-title open challenge, but the match was listed on the preview. McIntyre got a big reaction too, but not much bigger than Belair’s. Jinder Mahal jumped McIntyre before the bell so he was fighting from behind. They beat each other up for a bit with their hard hitting stuff until McIntyre won with the Claymore at 7:15. This was really short and I was expecting a lot more. C-.

Jinder jumped Drew post match and got Claymored.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Natalya/Tamina vs. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler

Natalya and Tamina were the faces here and it worked as well as it could have, meaning not very well in the slightest. These four just do not work that well together and you could tell watching here. The crowd did get a bit into things so it wasn’t a disaster. Tamina superkicked Baszler to retain at 8:52 after they were trying hard. C.

Of note, there was a kid behind me who was somewhere between 3-5 years old. He was there with his granddad, who didn’t seem to be overly familiar with modern wrestling. The granddad was talking to him throughout the match though, including asking if he thought Natalya would get out of trouble. The kid wasn’t quite sure which one Natalya was, but figured out that she was in red. This led to the most bizarre exchange I have heard in a long time.

Granddad: “Yeah Natalya is in the red. That’s Natalya Neidhart.”

3-5 Year Old Kid: “Like Jim The Anvil Neidhart?”

I had so many questions but this kid is being raised right.

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Kofi Kingston

This was supposed to be a handicap match but Xavier Woods was attacked in the back. He sent an angry Kingston on anyway and the singles match was on. This was pretty by the book with Kingston doing what he could but getting caught with the power. Kofi started making the comeback but got crotched on top, setting up the Hurt Lock at 9:56. Exactly what you would expect from these two in a ten minute house show match. C.

The Usos cut a quick promo on knowing they would win.

Intermission, with a few Guns N Roses songs. The Reigns promo from Friday aired with the missionary position line edited out.

Riddle vs. AJ Styles

Omos was here with Styles and it’s like watching Great Khali walk to the ring. There was no reference to Randy Orton, who was advertised for the show on Sunday afternoon before I made the drive. The crowd was behind AJ at first but he had them booing by the end. Riddle spanked AJ a few times to start so make your own GAY COMMUNITY jokes. Omos interfered but Charles Robinson heard him send Riddle into the steps. That was enough for the ejection, despite AJ dropping to his knees and begging. Riddle blocked the Phenomenal Forearm with a jumping knee and hit an RKO for the pin at 14:19. B-.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley vs. Nikki Ash

This was interesting because of the entrances. The fans were mostly quiet for Ash (more on that in a minute) and not bad for Ripley, but they seemed to be in awe of Charlotte. That is how they should be too, as she carries herself exactly like her dad did. Charlotte comes off like the biggest star in the world and that is why she gets pushed like she does. The title reigns are still ridiculous, but when you see her in this mode, you get everything WWE sees in her.

The match itself wasn’t great, as Ripley is now a full on face (even high fiving fans and smiling a lot), with Charlotte as the big bad. That leaves Nikki, who had to keep stealing shots when she could. She was on the floor a lot while Charlotte and Ripley beat each other up and then stole a double pin as the other two were fighting over a rollup to retain at 10:20.

Two things about this match. First, Nikki’s gear was rather different, as the tights were the same color as the top, basically eliminating the thong look. I’m assuming this is to keep it more PG and it’s a better look overall. If nothing else, it’s a lot less distracting.

Second, there were two guys behind me who kept yelling/talking about how the crowd sucked for not cheering in the right way for the best match of the night, including not reacting to Nikki. As obnoxious as it is to actually shout at the fans that they aren’t cheering right, the silence for Nikki makes perfect sense. Prior to Money in the Bank and the superhero deal, Nikki was just there. She hadn’t won anything of note and she had barely been around in months.

Well then she changes her gimmick, still doesn’t win any major matches, and then she wins Money in the Bank. She cashes in the next night and….yeah it’s still just Nikki Cross but now as a superhero. It’s like she won the title with a cheat code, so why should she be cheered as some conqueror? The superhero deal works and will be a smash with kids, but it isn’t going to get over until she looks like she can beat some people instead of winning a ladder match and stealing the title. They haven’t put the effort in with her yet and the crowd reaction showed it.

Roman Reigns/Usos vs. Dominik Mysterio/Rey Mysterio/John Cena

Reigns got a big reaction. The Mysterios got a big reaction. John Cena got a gigantic reaction that felt like he was coming out for a pay per view main event. You can feel that he is on another level and WWE knows that too. This was a well put together match as Cena kept wanting Reigns, even coming in to try and get after him multiple times but kept getting held back.

Rey took a long beating and Cena FINALLY got the hot tag at about 15:00 in to blow the roof off the place. Cena had Jimmy in the AA but Reigns cut him off with a Superman Punch. The spear hit the corner though and Cena gave Reigns an AA, which he more or less no sold but left anyway, leaving Jey to take the AA for the pin at 17:03. Easily the best part of the show, just for Cena’s insane star power and the match getting time while being well put together.

Cena threw gear out to end the show.

Overall, C+, as it was basically an All-Star show for a good $33 seat. They have momentum right now, but that isn’t going to last forever. As for house shows, just keep them like this for now. You had a good crowd, top stars and strong reactions. Work with that for as long as you can and stop with the double house shows for the time being.

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1994 (2014 Redo): It Was A Different Time

Summerslam 1994
Date: August 29, 1994
Location: United Center, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 23,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We open with highlights of the WWF softball team (that exists?) playing in a charity game against the Chicago media. Shawn of course plays without a shirt on. The video goes on for like five minutes with Monsoon doing commentary through every inning. Randy Savage, a former professional baseball player, hit a three run home run. The WWF won 9-7.

On to the actual wrestling tonight with Macho Man as Master of Ceremonies again. As Savage is posing in the ring, Lawler tells us that Diesel (currently Intercontinental Champion) and Shawn won the tag titles from the Headshrinkers last night in Indianapolis.

Headshrinkers vs. Bam Bam Bigelow/I.R.S.

The Million Dollar Team takes over on Fatu but a double clothesline puts he and Bigelow down. A double tag brings in Samu to face IRS as things break down a bit. A middle rope headbutt gets two on IRS and Bigelow is clotheslined out to the floor. IRS takes a double Stroke and Fatu adds the top rope splash but DiBiase has the referee. Bigelow goes after Albano which draws in Afa for the DQ.

Everyone brawls up the aisle.

We now get to the white elephant of the show: Leslie Nielsen and his partner from the Naked Gun movies is here to solve the mystery of the Undertaker. See, Undertaker had disappeared after the Royal Rumble but had vowed to return. DiBiase had a fake Undertaker doing his bidding but the real one was supposed to return tonight.

Nakano, the challenger, is a Japanese monster and has Luna Vachon in her corner. A quick clothesline and a hair drag put Blayze down as Nakano looks strong early. We hit a chinlock less than two minutes in but Blayze gets her feet on the ropes. A spin kick puts Nakano down for a few seconds but she comes back with a choke to take over again. Off to a modified Boston Crab as Nakano is destroying the champion so far.

Rating: C. This was an interesting match but it was hard to get into at times. Nakano was a monster who destroyed Blayze for about eight minutes and then Alundra got a quick suplex for the pin in fifteen seconds. Bull would win the title in a few months in Japan in a near masterpiece.

Shawn and Diesel brag about winning the tag titles but say Diesel will have no problem with Razor Ramon tonight. This is right around the time where the Kliq had taken over backstage and were basically running the company, hence them dominating the title scene.

Intercontinental Title: Diesel vs. Razor Ramon

The extra big man puts the big man in a sleeper but Razor comes out of it with a belly to back suplex. Diesel comes right back by launching Razor out to the floor, allowing Shawn to untie a buckle pad. Payton finally goes after Shawn but the distraction lets Shawn clothesline Razor down. Back in again and the champion hits his elbows and knee lifts in the corner but the referee stands in front of the exposed buckle. The referee looks at Shawn like an idiot, allowing Diesel to whip Ramon into the buckle for two.

Snake Eyes onto a covered buckle puts Ramon down again and an elbow to the back gets two. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back and a comeback attempt is countered by a boot to the face. Diesel hooks an abdominal stretch but eventually gets caught holding the top rope. Razor puts on an abdominal stretch of his own, only to be hiptossed down onto his bad back. Snake Eyes onto the exposed buckle is countered into a rollup for two and Razor starts coming back with right hands.

The middle rope bulldog gets two on Diesel as the fans are getting louder and louder. The Jackknife is countered but Diesel suplexes him down before Razor can follow up. Shawn tries to bring in the belt but gets caught in a tug of war with Payton. The referee yells at Payton so Shawn tries a superkick but of course hits the champion. Payton pulls Shawn out and Ramon pins the out cold Diesel for the title.

Diesel rants about Shawn screwing up and blames him for the loss.

Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mabel

Rating: D-. This was very dull as Jarrett had nothing to work with at all. Mabel was just so huge that it was almost impossible for anyone to do anything against him. Unfortunately for us Mabel would be pushed down our throats the next year, somehow main eventing the 1995 edition of the show. The match sucked.

The detectives are in the aisle, Undertaker pops up behind them, neither sees him, more PPV time is wasted.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

The champion makes another save before climbing up to the top of the cage, straddling the top of it. Owen pulls him back in and they continue slugging it out on the top rope. Bret rams him into the cage wall but loses his balance in the process, putting both guys back down. Jim Neidhart and Davey Boy Smith, both brothers in law of the two in the ring, are watching in the crowd.

Owen is up first but Bret makes about his 49th save of the match. Bret rams him face first into the steel and goes up again but Owen reaches through the bars to bring him back in. Back in again and Owen plants the champion with a piledriver but Bret still makes a save. Owen throws Bret down off the cage but Owen falls as well. Bret crawls for the door and gets the upper half of his body out, only to be pulled back in again by his younger brother. The drama on these near escapes is getting higher and higher.

Post match Neidhart jumps Davey Boy, throws Bret back in and locks himself in with them. A huge beatdown of Bret ensues as the Hart Brothers try to get in the cage. Davey Boy FINALLY gets in and the other brothers follow to save Bret.

In the back Owen says Neidhart is his real family. A series of great tag matches followed.

We recap the Undertaker disappearing at the Royal Rumble. 9 guys beat him up and locked him in a casket but his “spirit” levitated out of the casket, swearing to return. We get a bunch of people saying they had seen Undertaker in delis and coffee shops but DiBiase said he would bring Undertaker back.

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

Real misses a charge and falls to the floor where Fake sends him into the steps. Back in and Real wins a slugout but walks into a good chokeslam for no cover. Fake Tombstones him down but takes too long to cover, allowing for the sit up. A second Tombstone is countered into the Real one, followed by two more for the pin.

Ratings Comparison

IRS/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Headshrinkers

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano

Original: D+

Redo: C

Razor Ramon vs. Diesel

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

Original: C-

Redo: D

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mabel

Original: D-

Redo: D-

Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Original: A

Redo: A+

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: F

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D+

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/28/history-of-summerslam-count-up-summerslam-1994-from-great-matches-to-leslie-nielsen/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1994 (Original): A Really Bad Idea

Summerslam 1994
Date: August 29, 1994
Location: United Center, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 23,000
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

Well, where to begin with the changes? For one, Bret is the WWF Champion and is in the middle of his epic reign with it which would end two months later at the hands of…technically Owen Hart but Backlund got the title in one of the oddest choices ever. Your double main event here is Hart vs. Hart and Taker vs. Taker. Yeah, Taker got….he got….well he got something at the Rumble and hasn’t been seen since.
This became a comedy storyline to an extent with Leslie Nielsen from the Naked Gun movies being brought in because there had been Taker sightings. A new Undertaker had been brought in by DiBiase and of course was evil. Aside from those two matches, I remember nothing at all about this show. It’s these two matches or nothing here, so let’s get to them, and hopefully some other stuff that’s worth watching on the card as well.

Macho Man opens the show. Wait what? How long was he there anyway? I know he was at Starrcade 94 and had a bit of a build up to his appearance there, so this must have been one of his very last appearances. He uses a line from All About Eve which makes me smile. He throws it to Vince and Jerry so this was really just to get the crowd into the show.

Ah apparently this is his last WWF appearance. We’re told that there are new tag champions which I guess happened at a house show. Might help if I told you who the new champions are. It’s Shawn and Diesel. We run down the card and mention that Davey Boy is there in the crowd. Remember that as it plays a roll later one.

Bam Bam Bigelow/IRS vs. Headshrinkers

The Headshrinkers are the team that lost the tag belts, so I guess this was going to be a title match coming into this show? We’re getting more towards the modern look of the arena here as we have the lights in the shapes of dollar signs and the opening doors to the arena. This is part of the Million Dollar Team which is the original Cabinet but much better. Vince confirms that this was supposed to be a title match but now is non title which sucks for the heels.

I always like the Headshrinkers for some reason. When they were being built up as the top face team they worked like few others. Lou Albano is managing them now as this guy is the king of tag champions for some reason. They’re wearing crowns that look like Native American headdresses for some reason. Bigelow of course would soon be starting up the feud with LT that would just suck so heavily, making the 11th Mania perhaps the worst of all time. The Samoans are quite over here.

Fatu would of course later become known as Rikishi, the thong wearing, dancing Samoan. Bigelow would of course become IC’s porn. Faces are completely dominating for the majority of this match, which leads me to believe they’ll wind up losing. Of course as soon as I type that the Corporation takes over.

This lasts about a minute as the faces are in control again. Eventually they hit their double stroke and top rope splash move but it turns into a big fight with Afa beating up Bam Bam. It’s a DQ win for the heels (called it) and all four brawl up the aisle. Vince doesn’t understand why that’s the decision.

Rating: C+. It’s not bad, but it felt like it was in fast forward. Nothing was given time to develop which I guess is what an opener should be. This was fun I’d say, although me liking the Headshrinkers has a lot to do with that more than likely.

We go to the back where Leslie Nielsen is on the Undertaker’s Trail. There’s even a sign saying Undertaker’s Trail and an arrow. We can also hear his thoughts as he narrates. He runs into one of his co-stars who looks like Taker in the dark and they stand on a case, followed by them arguing over which of them is on the case. This is dumber than it sounds.

Razor says he’s getting the IC title back from Diesel. Walter Payton is going to be with him for no apparent reason.

Women’s Title: Alundra Blaze vs. Bull Nakano

Ok, Blaze is more commonly known as Madusa so that’s what I’ll be referring to her as partially. Nakano is a Japanese wrestler who is apparently a big deal over there. She comes out with Luna to Orient Express’ old music. This is the original women’s title, which is one of the biggest jokes in the history of wrestling, but in a way caused the Montreal Screwjob.

The division was a flat out waste as Blaze was the only woman that ever did anything with it, mainly as she was one of the few American women that could wrestle in the company. Anyway, she was champion for just about ever until she bailed for WCW. She’s the one that dropped the belt in the trash on live TV and made Vince paranoid to the point that he was afraid Bret would do the same thing with the WWF Title.

Anyway, you know the rest and here were are with the title match that no one cared about and most won’t today. Nakano just wasn’t someone that Americans cared about and got the same treatment that Chono and Muta got in WCW: Great workers, but no one cared at all. Nakano probably weighs about 200 pounds or so. Her hair is about a foot tall. There’s a Y in Blaze but I’m sick of the red lines under it.

This match is pretty bad. The problem simply was that women’s wrestling was somehow less serious back then than it is now. Blaze would be barely above an average worker in today’s product, but back then she was Trish and Lita rolled into one.

This is just not that interesting as it’s sloppy and your stereotypical women’s match in a lot of ways, from hair throws to poor execution. It’s ok I guess, but it’s really not that great. Blaze hits some bad looking takedowns before dodging the top rope leg and hitting the German suplex for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was just there. It wasn’t that great but it wasn’t that terrible. The women’s division was just horrid back then and part of the reason was there wasn’t enough talent to warrant a whole division. Blaze was a pioneer for the division but there were far more talented workers later on.

Diesel and Shawn are with Todd, talking about their title win and then the IC Title match tonight. Diesel was actually quite good on the mic.

Intercontinental Title: Diesel vs. Razor Ramon

Diesel is champion here which is a very forgotten reign, especially since he’d get the world title in about three months. For some reason Shawn is introduced after Diesel is, despite him accompanying Diesel to the ring. Crowd pops like a coconut for Razor, as I still don’t get why he never got a short run with the world title. Yet again, a face befriends a local sports legend. Razor is wearing sky blue boots, which he can actually work I think.

The good thing about Razor here is that he’s a big guy so he can wrestle with big guys but he has the speed tactics here to counter Diesel, which makes this a very interesting match in my eyes. This is pretty standard yet solid fare here as Razor starts out hot and fast with Diesel eventually taking over with slower power moves which work very well for him. I still don’t get the point in Walter being there but that’s just me.

Shawn gets involved and helps beat on Razor as the football legend is still rather worthless in this match other than for moral support which is worthless of course. Shawn and Diesel combine to get the buckle exposed and ram Razor’s back into it. Jerry asks why Payton is there and is ignored. That’s a funny thing to me as even Vince has no idea but just won’t admit it. Walter has of course done nothing to counter Shawn this whole time.

We get a short comeback from Razor but it’s nothing of note really, which makes me wonder why I’m noting it here. Correction it’s a decent one as he throws those great right hands of his. After Shawn keeps getting involved and the referee keeps going after Walter, Shawn goes for the IC belt and he and Walter fight over it. Shawn loses the tug of war and goes for the kick. Of course it misses and Razor pins Diesel for the belt.

This would happen again and would result in Diesel and Shawn splitting, leading to Diesel taking the world title in November. Payton joins in celebrating despite doing jack. Diesel stalks Shawn up the ramp. Oh good grief Walter’s son is there too. Why not his old roommate while we’re at it?

Rating: B-. I’m sorry Chicago residents/Bears fans, but Payton was worthless in this. He’s an amazing running back and a great man, but there was no need to have him here. Put 1-2-3 Kid there or something, but not a football player with no connection to the match at all. Match itself was fine though as these two have that natural chemistry together. Fun match but Payton hurt things in my eyes.

We go to Macho who says nothing of note at all.

Vince recaps what we just saw, which shows Walter talking to the referee while Shawn is getting ready to kick Razor. Ok, that means one of two things. Razor slipping out was pre-planned or Walter is a freaking moron that will let his buddy get kicked. Yeah, great move there.

We go to the back with Diesel saying he’s mad at Shawn for costing him the belt and saying that Payton wasn’t even an issue. Shawn says it’s ok and he’ll get Diesel out of this.

Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

Oh I had forgotten about this. This was actually a really well done story in my eyes. Here’s the idea: Luger and Tatanka are feuding with DiBiase’s team. Luger is constantly being offered a spot on the team for a big amount of money but he always turns it down. Things of course start looking like he took the money but never completely. Tatanka and everyone else is convinced that Luger is guilty, so the two of them are having this match here in which Luger allegedly will show that he sold out.

This was drawn out and really well built up to the point that we were believing Lex was evil now, when I think the real answer is pretty obvious. DiBiase keeps doing all kinds of things to imply that Luger has sold out including helping him win a match and DiBiase going into Luger’s locker room. Luger continues saying that DiBiase can do all kinds of things but Luger has never done anything wrong, which is very true.

Luger gets a somewhat mixed reaction, being about 70-30 for the face pop. The cheers are louder, but the booing is there. DiBiase isn’t there either, which is a point of interest I guess. He hits the corner and the boos are MUCH louder now. Bell rings and they’re arguing over whether or not he sold out. The whole point of this is waiting on DiBiase to come out and help Lex and the match is just kind of meandering along which isn’t good at all as it makes the match boring. You need a good match to go with a good story to make something really successful and this isn’t doing it. It’s ok, but just ok.

Finally DiBiase comes out with a big bag full of money. As Luger is looking at him and the money, Tatanka rolls him up for the pin. Post match, Luger goes after DiBiase and Tatanka attacks him, turning heel and legitimately surprising a lot of the fans. The heels hug and the fans are LIVID.

Tatanka beats the tar out of Lex and leaves with Ted, but turns around to beat on Lex some more. He puts the Million Dollar Dream on him to put Luger to sleep and follows with the ultimate humiliation of putting the money in his mouth. Why that is humiliating I have no idea but it looks awesome.

Rating: C-. This is a great example of the angle being far better than the match. The match was pretty bad but the angle was excellent. This was a total swerve and while it’s clear it was going to happen now, it was really well done at the time. The match sucked but the angle makes up for it.

We’ve only got three matches left, so this one is yours. Why this took place is beyond me. At the end you get a sample of the brilliant comedy that the company had going for it at the time.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mabel

This is filler on the second biggest show of the year. This was a rather bad time if you didn’t get that. Well that’s not really fair as there was filler at almost any show back in the day. Vince says he’s a fan of good rap. Therefore he’s not a fan of Oscar and Mabel. Jarrett won’t shake his hand to start us off. Nice old school heel work there.

Mabel does Jarrett’s strut which isn’t bad. Basic story here as Jarrett can’t fight him at all due to the gravitational force of Mabel’s gut sucking the good out of this match. Jarrett shoves Oscar into the steps and then Mable eats post. Jarrett just tries to get Mabel down and of course nothing works until Jarrett gets pulled out of the air when attempting a top rope double axe.

Sleeper goes on and Mabel does his stupid falling kick thing. Knuckleball Schwartz (and mine is bigger than his) is on strike. Ok then. Jarrett, like an idiot, goes after Oscar for fun and gets crushed for his troubles. Middle rope splash misses Jeff. Mabel misses a sit down drop and Jeff actually gets the pin. I’m at a loss for words to describe how much of a waste of time this was.

Rating: D-. Just a totally pointless match here as they made no secret at all of there being no need for this match. Basic big vs. little guy here as nothing of note was going on here at all. Get on to something else please.

The detectives are in the arena and Taker’s silhouette is behind them. I really hate this show.

We get a long buildup package on Bret vs. Owen which was very well done, especially the masterful jobs from Survivor Series and Mania, which was the absolute classic that was Bret vs. Owen. Owen’s heel work in this was absolutely masterful. This was built up for nearly a year and is one of the best feuds that I can ever remember. I’m enjoying looking back at this as it really was well done and you could feel the tension here.

Owen pinning Bret clean at Mania was mind blowing at the time and still is to this day. Bret’s old partner Neidhart has joined up with Owen as well which makes thing even more amazing. The beauty in having Owen win was that it made you believe he could do it for the title here tonight. That’s a great bonus and it makes matches better and more believable. Bruce, their brother, went off on him, while wearing a leather jacket.

Did Stu make his fortune as a leather tanner or something? Owen did a promo in the cage about a week before which was great. I know this is long but the recap is about 10 minutes long. Stu and Helen are interviewed at ringside which I don’t think I’ve ever heard before. Helen sounds typical but Stu sounds very odd indeed. Not how I imagined it, but the man is an absolute legend and one of the few people who played a big role in shaping the business into what it is today.

I can’t think of anyone that’s trained more stars than he has. Davey says that he wouldn’t want to be in the ring with Bret tonight. Neidhart is there too and he’s an Owen supporter. This is really intricate and intense and is one heck of a story if I do say so myself. I’m hyped for this match and I’ve seen it probably 8 times.

Bret is apparently getting over strep throat. I’ve had that about 30 times and if you’ve never had it, consider yourself lucky. It’s misery. Bret says he doesn’t hate Owen but he does hate Neidhart because Jim made Owen jealous in the first place. He says this ends tonight.

WWF Title: Cage Match-Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Since I’ve explained the story pretty well, I’ll spare you another retelling of it. Owen’s heel music owned. Bret’s face music owned. Sweet goodness this match rocks in all areas. Never marked out for a Bret match before but I am on this one. In a nice touch, Owen’s name graphic doesn’t show up until he’s in the cage and Bret’s music is playing, almost like he’s a jobber. The bell rings and we’re off immediately.

For some reason we have no commentary at the beginning. Ah there it is. I’m watching this on my laptop and the audio is the kind where half is in one ear and the rest is in the other on my headphones. The referee is outside which is a good thing to me. That enziguri from Owen just never gets old. They’re starting out really slowly which is also good as they’re not going for broke immediately but rather telling a story out there.

Both go for the quick exit very early on which is a nice touch. Owen wants to beat Bret and Bret just wants to end this as the title is secondary to him. We get a really good camera shot from over the corner of the cage. That’s a unique shot that’s cool looking. Owen lands a dropkick and then a nip up before literally diving at the cage wall, desperate to get out. This is just hilarious looking but at the same time you can see how desperate Owen is to win here.

That’s yet another nice little touch. It’s the little things like that which can make a match great as they show that the workers are thinking and not just wrestling. They’ve been going about 10 minutes so far and it’s pretty even at this point. Pretty sure this is escape only which is what a cage match should be. Screw that pinning and submission nonsense.

Lawler keeps trying to play up Bulldog vs. Hart from 92 but Vince says that it means nothing, which is true as they were friendly afterwards, especially since Davey was gone for a long period of that. The good thing about this match is that it’s not about the cage but about the wrestlers and the cage is more of a prop. That’s always better. This is a ton of last second saves and close calls which keeps the fans on their toes.

They trade sharpshooters as I’m very close to the end of the match and I have nothing to make fun of here as it’s a great match. They chase each other up the cage but Owen’s leg gets tied up and Bret drops down to keep the title. Post match, Neidhart jumps the rail and beats on Bret for a bit before taking him back inside the cage and locking the door.

We then get the siege of the cage as all of the Harts try to get in before Smith goes up the cage and knocks Owen off. This takes like 4 minutes to finally accomplish which actually is kind of a cool looking sight. Finally Smith runs the heels off. They help Bret to his feet before we go to the back to talk to Owen.

Rating: A. This was a great cage match as there’s the natural chemistry and rivalry there, and if you give these two thirty plus minutes, are you expecting anything less than greatness?

Owen and Neidhart are in the back as Owen talks about how only Bret ever got cared about and how Jim was his best friend. It’s better than it sounds.

Recap of Taker vs. Taker. Short version, Taker disappeared after the Rumble to heal an injury and hadn’t been seen since. He returned but he was different, controlled by DiBiase. This was actually Brian Lee who was Chainz in the DOA in a few years. We get testimonials from regular people, making this seem like Elvis sightings. I refuse to believe that these people are wrestling fans.

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

DiBiase brings out the fake one and then Fink says that his opponent is the one and only Undertaker. We get a casket rolled out as well as this entrance is just taking too long. The casket is opened and inside is a huge urn. Bearer takes it into the ring and actually opens it, revealing….a really powerful flashlight. This goes on for several minutes as I’m pretty bored. This somehow triggers Taker to appear and walk down the ramp.

When I say walk, I mean move…..kind of. Fake Taker looks to weigh about 340. While this is kind of a cool moment, Bret and Owen should have closed the show. It’s not that bad though and it could have gone over far worse. Real Taker is in purple and fake is in gray. Real even throws out a leap frog that is amazing to see when you think about it.

The crowd is still popping but so much of their emotion was taken out of them by the previous match that it’s just hard for them to get hyped here, and I can’t blame them. This is a cool idea, but it just shouldn’t have gone last. This is pretty basic for the most part. Real leads for the early part, fake takes over and dominates the majority, standard Taker comeback with three tombstones to get the emphatic win for the real Deadman.

The count is slower than the walk that got him there though which is odd. Ted is ran off as Taker poses like crazy to end the show. Actually it doesn’t as we throw it to Macho to end the show. Actually it doesn’t as we go to the detectives in the back who open Taker’s casket to find nothing. Then one finds a briefcase which is closed. “The case is closed!” We go off the air like that. When I was a kid I never got that joke and it’s still awful today.

Rating: B. The match was fine, but it shouldn’t have gone last. At least we got a decent moment to end on with the real Taker standing tall, or in his case kneeling moderate. The comedy thing was just a waste as they never even interact with Taker, but that’s a good thing.

Overall Rating: C-. This really is just a one match show as the rest is just pretty silly. Luger and Tatanka’s angle is great, the cage match is excellent, and that’s about it. The comedy thing with the detectives was just flat out stupid on all levels and I certainly could have done without it.

They’re on screen all of 3 minutes and they have nothing but sight gags and dumb moments. I didn’t get the point back then and I don’t now. There’s nothing much to this show other than the cage, so I’d say find a copy of that and the buildup and other than that, go watch a better show as this isn’t that good.

 

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Daily News Update – July 25, 2021

It’s House Show Day!

 

Several Names Missing From WWE Training Sessions, Who Was There.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/details-wwe-training-sessions-several-wrestlers-missing/

VIDEO: Margot Robbie Slept With A John Cena Cutout In Her Bedroom For A Year.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/margot-robbie-slept-john-cena-cutout-bedroom-years/

Double Up: Professional Wrestler Sets National Records In Different Sport.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/impact-wrestling-star-sets-national-records-different-sport/

Kane Was Almost The Big Green Machine.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kane-almost-big-green-machine/

VIDEO: WWE Shows Look At Its Amazing Charity Work.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/video-wwe-shows-look-amazing-charity-work/

WWE Doing Something Cool With Summerslam For The First Time.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/wwe-something-cool-summerslam-first-time/

As always, please check out all of the videos if you can, hit up the comments section and get on the Wrestling Rumors Facebook page.




Ring Of Honor Best In The World 2021: Let Them In

Best In The World 2021
Date: July 11, 2021
Location: UMBC Event Center, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 1,250
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Caprice Coleman

It’s time for the fans to be back here as well, which should make things a little more energetic. Ring of Honor has been one of the more consistently quality TV shows as of late and now they need to make that work on television as well. That might be easier said than done though so let’s get to it.

It really is cool to see some fans back.

Tracy Williams is out of the Tag Team Title match due to being hit by a car a few weeks back, so Jay Lethal will be defending in his place.

Pre-Show: Demonic Flaimta vs. Rey Horus

This is a rematch from the Survival of the Fittest qualifying round. Horus knocks him to the floor to start and snaps off a hurricanrana from the apron. Flamita gets whipped into the barricade but he is fine enough to dropkick Horus out of the air back inside. A running kick to the head gives Flamita a rather arrogant near fall and it’s time to slap Horus in the mask. Flamita stays cocky and cuts Horus down with some chops. Horus gets back up for a middle rope bodyscissors to the floor, naturally setting up the big no hands dive.

Back in and Horus hits a crazy springboard spinning tornado DDT for two. They get back up and slug it out until Flamita gets in a sitout powerbomb for two of his own. A frog splash onto Horus’ lets leaves both of them down until they slug it out from their knees. Back to back superkicks rock Horus, who grabs a satellite DDT for two more. Horus goes up top and gets pulled down with the MuscleBuster into the knees to the chest. Another superkick gives Flamita two so he tries another, only to get sunset flipped to give Horus the pin at 9:49.

Rating: B-. Take two luchadors and let them fly all over the place for about ten minutes. What better way is there to wake up a crowd for the rest of the night? Ring of Honor, like many other promotions before it, knew what they needed to do here and it worked out again. These guys were all over the place and that’s exactly what they should have been doing.

Post match Flamita drops Horus again and even spits on him.

Bouncers vs. PCO/Danhausen

The Bouncers have Ken Dixon with him. Brawler Milonas jumps PCO before the bell and it’s Danhausen in early trouble. Beer City Bruiser comes in to slam Danhausen, allowing Brawler to send him into the corner by the neck. A running clothesline drops Danhausen again and it’s time to choke on the ropes. It’s off to Bruiser for a clothesline of his own and it’s a Samoan drop into Brawler’s falling splash.

Danhausen avoids a charge in the corner though and manages a German suplex, allowing the hot tag to PCO. Striking abounds, setting up a crossbody of all things. PCO busts out a pair of dives onto both Bouncers and helps Danhausen chokeslam Bruiser. Cue Sledge to stare at PCO and Danhausen but Brawler takes PCO down.

Bruiser hits something like a Vader Bomb from the apron to the floor to crush PCO (egads), leaving Danhausen alone. Danhausen gets caught in a powerbomb from Brawler (Danhausen: “NO! PUT ME DOWN!”), which he slips out of to set up a hurricanrana off the apron and into the post. A quick pat wakes up PCO and Danhausen’s headbutt rocks Bruiser. Goodnighthausen is broken up so Danhausen manages an AA onto the teeth. The PCOsault finishes Bruiser at 9:05.

Rating: C. I can go for this kind of lighthearted comedy where they make no secret about what they are doing. Yeah it’s goofy but that’s the point, as Danhausen is in the exact right spot. If you want to have him team with PCO as a goofy team for awhile then so be it, as they aren’t going to win the titles or anything. Have some fun and don’t go anywhere beyond that.

Post match, PCO and Sledge have their staredown with Danhausen breaking it up.

The opening video looks at some of the bigger matches. They’re keeping it simple here.

PJ Black/Brian Johnson vs. Briscoe Brothers

The Brothers are back on the same page after beating each other up on their farm. Johnson yells at the fans on the way to the ring, because they’re all fat people who got fatter during the pandemic. He doesn’t like the idiot Briscoes either because they all like kissing their cousin. We even get a few jabs at Mama Briscoe, which is not likely going to go well. Johnson brags about being the best in the ring and on the mic so everyone will know his name.

It’s a big brawl to start (again, you don’t mess with a mama) and the Briscoes get the better of it, because Black messed with Mama Briscoe. Mark uses a chair for a big dive to drop Johnson and we settle down to Mark chopping at him inside. Jay comes in for the uppercuts and Mark does the same, as Ian says Happy Birthday to his mom (who you shouldn’t mess with either).

It’s off to Black, who kicks Mark in the face a few times to take over. Johnson adds a slam into an elbow drop for two and the referee takes some yelling. Mark isn’t having that though and fights up to bring Jay back in. The yelling and fighting are both on with Jay getting the better of things on Johnson. Black breaks up Redneck Boogie and Jay accidentally knocks Mark outside.

Johnson’s rollup gets two and Black breaks up the Doomsday Device. The Spike Eskin plants Jay and sets up a 450 to give Black two of his own. Jay kicks Black off the apron and Mark hits the kick through the ropes to Black. The apron Blockbuster drops Johnson and there’s the Cactus Elbow. Back in and the Jay Driller into the Froggy Bow finishes Black at 8:06.

Rating: C. This could have been fine as a TV main event so it works out well for a pay per view opener. The main point here was to establish that the Briscoes are back on the same page, which is a nice followup after their Fight On The Farm. It didn’t have much drama, but should there be between these teams?

We recap EC3 vs. Flip Gordon. EC3 was not happy with Gordon cheating to win a tag match because it does not fit with EC3’s Quest For Honor. At least it’s better than whatever he had been doing in the past few months.

EC3 vs. Flip Gordon

I’m not big on either guy so let’s get this over with already. They shake hands to start, with Gordon pulling him into a headlock for the opening bell. A hard shoulder drops Gordon but he’s right back up with the headlock. Gordon goes after the knee to take over and unloads on him with chops in the corner. A Ricky Steamboat style double chop puts Gordon down again but he takes out the knee in the corner.

There’s a dropkick to the knee to put EC3 on the floor, with the fans not sounding pleased. The leg cranking is on back inside but EC3 powers out, meaning it’s off to a chop off. The Psycho Boy takes Gordon down but the knee gives out again, allowing Gordon to bail to the floor. Gordon sweeps the legs and wraps the knee around the post to take over again.

Back in and the Submit To Flip goes on until EC3 makes it over to the ropes. Gordon goes up but gets top rope superplexed back down for the big crash. Gordon’s springboard….something is chopped out of the air but the knee doesn’t let EC3 follow up. A low superkick rocks EC3, who smiles up at him. That means it’s an Angel’s Wings into the Purpose (Bank Statement) finishes Gordon at 11:14.

Rating: C+. They worked a nice match here and both guys looked good, though it wasn’t exactly a smash. EC3 sold the leg well as it messed with his offense, but I’m still not sure I get what he is doing. It seems to be working for him, but a bit clearer of an explanation would be nice.

Post match Gordon slaps him in the face instead of shaking his hand, so EC3 extends his hand again. Another slap gets the same result, so Gordon spits in his face and walks off.

Six Man Tag Team Titles: Dalton Castle/Eli Isom/Dak Draper vs. Shane Taylor Promotions

Shane Taylor Promotions (Taylor/Soldiers of Savagery (Moses/Khan), with O’Shay Edwards) are defending. Castle’s jumpsuit is back and so are the Dancing Boys, because they better be. Draper takes Khan to the mat to start as we hear about Khan being a prince in Cameroon. Khan goes with the power and runs him over, allowing the double tag off to Isom and Moses. A dropkick staggers Moses but Isom tries a waistlock for no apparent reasons.

Castle comes in instead and points out that the fans are chanting for him (not exactly). The threat of wrestling earns Castle a hard push back into the corner but he low bridges Moses outside. The tease of a dive lets Castle drop to to the floor and hop onto the barricade for some more dancing. Back in and Castle gets all fired up on Shane, who drops him with a single chop. Isom comes in again and is planted with a spinebuster, allowing Khan to come back in for a suplex.

It’s back to Draper, who snapmares Khan down to drop a knee to the face, allowing Castle to snap off a t-bone suplex. The fast tags continue with Isom coming back in for a belly to belly, but Castle wants to come in instead. The delay lets Moses come in and wreck the challengers as everything breaks down. Back in and Draper picks up the pace, along with Moses for a powerslam, only to be told that Shane made a blind tag.

For some reason Draper thinks he can Dr. Bomb Taylor, who easily reverses into the Marcus Garvey Driver instead. Castle breaks that up so Isom comes back in for a rather impressive Air Raid Crash….as Castle is being tended to by the Boys on the floor. Isom goes up instead of covering but has to shove Castle off for trying to go up at the same time. That’s enough for Khan to hit a super Jackhammer (geez) and it’s time for the parade of finishers. Taylor has had enough of this and hits Draper with Welcome To The Land to retain at 10:56.

Rating: C. This was a very story heavy match as Castle continues to be a bit of a self obsessed pest, but how can you not love the jumpsuit? Isom continues to look like a star in the making and Ring of Honor is about the only place he could make that work at the moment. I’m still not sure why these titles exist, but the match was ok enough.

We get an ad for Honor Pals, Ring of Honor’s version of Wrestling Buddies, because those are the greatest wrestling toys ever.

Silas Young vs. Josh Woods

Last Man Standing and this former mentor vs. former mentee. They even make things a bit more interesting by pointing out that Young is 3-0 in Last Man Standing matches, making it his signature match. Woods jumps him from behind in the aisle though, because woods is smart like that. Young gets sent hard into the barricade but he is right back up with a springboard clothesline to put Woods on the apron. A hard forearm to the back cuts Young down again and Woods knocks him outside again.

Woods grabs a chair but Young shoves the referee into him (smart) to take it away. A chaos suplex off the barricade drops Woods again and it’s time to set up a table. We’ll add a ladder next to the apron, with Ian explaining that it’s there to fix the lighting. Woods sends him into the ladder and throws in a table of his own. Said table is set up in the corner, followed by a bunch of running strikes to Young in the corner. Young picks him up for a drive through the table though and it’s time to slug it out from their knees.

Woods pulls him into a leglock with Young crawling underneath the ropes and tapping to no avail. Yet another table is set up next to the other one on the floor but Young gets in a low blow for a breather. For some reason Young tries a running hurricanrana and is quickly powerbombed onto the ladder for his efforts. Woods throws in a bunch of chairs but gets caught in a backbreaker back inside. A chair shot to the back has Woods in trouble and Young nails Misery for a nine count. They slug it out on the apron above the two tables….and Woods German suplexes Young through both of them for the win at 13:10.

Rating: B-. That’s how it should have gone as these guys beat each other up for a good while until Woods survived. They built up the idea that Young was the best guy at this kind of match and then had someone beat him. Woods has been ready to break through to the next level for a long time now, though I’m not sure if this is going to be the big step forward.

During Hour One, Vincent challenged Matt Taven to a cage match in August and then beat him down.

From the trainer’s room, Taven accepts.

Brody King vs. Jay Lethal

Tracy Williams is here with Lethal. King powers him down with no effort to start and tells Lethal to bring it. A strike off doesn’t work for Lethal either so it’s a very early Lethal Injection for one. King bails to the floor so Lethal hits four straight suicide dives. That isn’t enough to put King down so Lethal hits a baseball slide, which doesn’t put him down either. Instead, King knocks him down again and throws him over the top by the throat. Back in and Lethal is chopped down in the corner as he can’t get anything to work so far.

King hammers away in the corner but Lethal slips out of a superplex and hits a powerbomb. That doesn’t last long either as King is back with a snap piledriver. King pounds him into a chair and hits a running crossbody to knock them both down. A Death Valley Driver onto the apron gets two on Lethal and he can’t even stand up for the Ganso Bomb. That means a hard running lariat to knock Lethal even sillier, followed by a pair of Ganso Bombs for the pin at 10:43.

Rating: C+. The more I see from this version of King, the more I’m expecting him to be the Final Battle World Title challenger. He was treated like a monster here and basically squashed Lethal, whose biggest stuff didn’t do much damage. That’s the right way to go with this and the Ganso Bomb looks like the biggest weapon going at the moment. Nice job.

We recap Mike Bennett vs. Jonathan Gresham for the Pure Rules Title. Bennett won a Pure Rules gauntlet match to earn a title shot but Gresham flat out said he didn’t respect him. Bennett has heard that over and over again but Gresham says this is all about his legacy. Now it’s time for Bennett to prove him wrong.

Pure Rules Title: Mike Bennett vs. Jonathan Gresham

Gresham is defending and this is under Pure Rules, with an extended pay per view time limit. Cary Silkin of all people joins commentary as the fans seem split to start. An early lockup goes nowhere as they seem to be taking their time here. Gresham grabs a waistlock to start the grappling but gets taken to the mat without much effort. They pop back up with Bennett shouldering him down to make things seem a bit more serious.

The threat of a London Dungeon (seated armbar) sends Gresham going straight to the rope for the first break. Gresham pulls him down and starts cranking on the arm for some unnatural angles. An armdrag sets up a hammerlock and Gresham cranks on the other arm at the same time. Now it’s time to twist the ankle at the same time as Gresham’s confidence is going up. Back up and Gresham’s running shoulder hurts Bennett’s arm again.

The Kimura goes on so Bennett uses his first rope break in a smart move. Gresham is sent outside so Bennett tries a dive, only to get pulled back into the Kimura. Bennett taps to no avail before going back inside for another rope break for a bit of a weird sequence. Back up and Bennett goes for the arm as well, meaning Gresham needs his second break. Bennett uses the good arm to hit a Death Valley Driver for two and the seated armbar goes on again.

With that broken up, Bennett clotheslines him down but the arm gives out on a piledriver attempt. Another clothesline gets two on Gresham but the arm is banged up. Gresham is smart enough to use his feet to pop the arm and Bennett is in a lot of trouble. The Cobra Twist sends Bennett to the ropes for the third and final time so a pair of springboard standing moonsaults have Bennett knocked to the floor. Gresham adds a suicide dive but Bennett is right back up with a powerbomb for two.

That’s fine with Gresham, who pulls him into the Crossface. Somehow Bennett crawls out and rolls Gresham into the corner. The piledriver connects for three…but Gresham gets his foot on the ropes for his final break. Gresham switches it up and pops the knee this tine but Bennett stacks him up on a rollup attempt for two of his own. With the arm not working, Gresham ties him in a nasty looking kneebar for the tap to retain at 19:21.

Rating: B. There is something so fun about watching Gresham pick apart a limb like that as he turns it into a science. Bennett was trying hard here but got taken down piece by piece, with Gresham taking him apart to win in the end. This was a heck of a performance and it is great to see him do it every time. The problem is I’m not sure who is going to be able to beat him, as he is virtually unstoppable in this kind of a match. In other words, whoever takes the title from him is going to look awesome and get a heck of a rub.

Jay Lethal is too banged up to defend the Tag Team Titles so Tracy Williams asks Jonathan Gresham to take his place. Gresham reluctantly agrees.

TV Title: Tony Deppen vs. Dragon Lee

Deppen is defending, Lee has La Bestia de la Ring in his corner and Kenny King is on commentary. They go straight to the slugout to start with neither being able to get very far with the forearms. They try chops instead with Lee knocking him into the corner, where Deppen reverses for more chops of his own. Lee gets knocked outside so Deppen follows him, only to get kicked in the chest.

Deppen pounds him down again, setting up a suicide Canadian Destroyer, which is only good for two because the Destroyer is more played out than the DDT. Back in and Lee is fine enough to hit a shotgun dropkick in the corner. With Deppen in trouble, Lee puts him on top for an Alberto double stomp to the apron (dang that always looks rough) but Deppen is right back in with a small package for two.

It’s bad enough that King heads to the ring for a distraction so it’s an exchange of no sold German suplexes. Lee hits a poisonrana but Deppen pops back up for the double clothesline to put them both down. Back up and Lee kicks the knee out the Dragon Driver gets two more as frustration is setting in. More kicks just fire Deppen up and he chops away, only to get suplexed into a powerbomb. The Incinerator gives Lee the title back at 10:10.

Rating: C+. This was a spotfest and that might get a little annoying in a hurry. What are you supposed to do when a match features a suicide Canadian Destroyer for two? They weren’t even bother to sell a lot of the time here and while I get the idea, it was hardly the best thing to see. Entertaining perhaps, but it took me out of things more than once.

King comes in to celebrate so here are Homicide and Chris Dickinson to chase them off. They’re challenging for the Tag Team Titles next so here are the champs to start the match less than two minutes after the previous one ended.

Tag Team Titles: Foundation vs. Violence Unlimited

Rhett Titus and Jonathan Gresham are defending for the Foundation in a Fight Without Honor (basically a street fight). The brawl is on in a hurry with Gresham beating Dickinson up on the floor. That leaves Titus to send Homicide into a chair in the ring as the violence begins. Dickinson catches Titus on top though and shoves him into an open chair (freaking ow man) but Gresham is back in with an abdominal stretch on Homicide.

With that broken up, Gresham kicks the chairs out….as Titus gives Homicide a Falcon Arrow through the timekeeper’s table. Back in and Dickinson chokes Gresham with I believe a shirt but can’t quite get an armbar. The Death Valley Driver gets two on Gresham and Homicide is back with a super cutter on Titus. That’s not even good for a cover as Titus is up with a powerslam with Dickinson having to make a save. Titus goes Rob Van Dam with a dropkick into a chair (not quite a Van Daminator but close enough), leaving Gresham to Octopus Homicide.

Dickinson breaks it up again and it’s a camel clutch into a Homicide basement dropkick. An STF has Gresham in more trouble and Homicide throws in a table, which Gresham shoves out while still in the hold. Gresham won’t tap so Homicide busts out a fork but Titus breaks it up with a gutwrench suplex. Titus sets up the table but Dickinson breaks up a superplex attempt, meaning it’s a super Razor’s Edge to send Titus crashing through the table. Homicide busts out the always terrifying Cop Killer on Gresham for the pin and the titles at 11:01.

Rating: C. I couldn’t get into this as it was like they had two different matches going on at once. Gresham was trying to do his technical stuff and the other three were having a hardcore brawl (makes sense for Homicide and Dickinson). It also felt like they were flying through everything here to get things done in a hurry, especially with the fast start. Not bad or anything but I couldn’t get into this.

Here is Maria Kanellis-Bennett to introduce former Ring of Honor broadcaster Lenny Leonard, who will be calling the Women’s Title tournament. We even have brackets!

Sumie Sakai
Rok-C

Mandy Leon
Vita VonStarr

Max
Holidead

Angelina Love
BYE

Alize
Gracia

Mazzerati
Nicole Savoy

Allysin Kay
Willow

Marti Belle
Adora

Some of those are missing first/last names but that’s as much as we get.

Actually hold on though as Vita VonStarr is out due to breaking rules, so we have a replacement: Chelsea Green, who says this is what freedom looks like. She just spent two and a half years being deemed unworthy so she is here to prove that she is enough. The Maryland Athletic Commission has deemed her unfit to compete, but she will be ringside throughout the tournament watching everyone. Her scars remind her that she is unstoppable and in one month, she is taking this division to the forefront of wrestling. So we still don’t know who is getting the final spot.

We recap the World Title match. Bandido won Survival of the Fittest to earn the shot and he is coming for the unstoppable Rush.

Ring of Honor World Title: Rush vs. Bandido

Bandido is challenging and gets jumped at the bell, with Rush hitting the Bull’s Horns at six seconds for a one count as he pulls his foot off of Bandido’s chest. They head outside with Bandido being whipped into the barricade to take the beating into the crowd. Back to ringside and a heck of a whip sends Bandido into the barricade, setting up the whipping with the camera cord.

They get back inside with Rush cockily kicking away and stomping on Bandido’s head. There’s another kick to the face in the corner and Rush is feeding off of the crowd. Bandido falls outside and Rush cracks him in the leg with a chair. More playing to the crowd lets Bandido get up for a desperation dive, his first offense in about five minutes. Back in and a shooting star press gets two on Rush as the leg is mostly fine. Rush grabs (kind of) him low to ask where something is but charges into an attempt at the X Knee.

That’s broken up as Rush hits a superkick instead, only to get caught in a crucifix bomb for two. An overhead belly to belly sends Bandido hard into the corner and he gets dropkicked out of the air. Rush sends him outside for a big dive and let’s get a table. Bandido manages to get back inside for a superkick though and a running shove sends Rush through the table. Back in and they trade some snap German suplexes until Bandido hits a pop up touch of the head (supposed to be a cutter).

That earns him a spinning kick to the head (fair enough as it was nowhere near a cutter, which commentary pointed out) and they’re both down again. It’s Rush up first to drag Bandido to the apron by the hair but Bandido is back up with the super fall away slam. The 21 Plex connects for two and the fans think this is awesome. Bandido charges into another suplex into the corner and Rush starts tearing at the mask. A shove of the referee is enough for Bandido to grab a rollup for the pin and the title at 16:04.

Rating: B+. These guys started fast and didn’t stop, which is how a match like this is supposed to go. They had one heck of a hard hitting fight with Rush being the monster who got too cocky and let the athletic freak catch up to him in the end as he went over the line. The match absolutely didn’t feel like sixteen minutes and it was the right call as Rush had been champion for far too long already. Heck of a main event and worth a look as Bandido jumps through the glass ceiling.

Post match, La Faccion Ingobernable runs in to beat down Bandido, with Rush getting in a belt shot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s a rather good show with the main event leading the way, but it was also a bit longer than it needed to be and a match or two could have been dropped. What matters most here though is some stuff happened, as so much of Ring of Honor TV feels like it just keeps happening with no end in sight. Good show here, but it could have used more than a few adjustments.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 23, 2007: We’re Getting There

Smackdown
Date: February 23, 2007
Location: ipayOne Center, San Diego, California
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

No Way Out has come and gone, with the big story being Batista attacking Undertaker to end the show. It wasn’t quite a heel turn but rather Batista being more aggressive and ready to fight. That should make things all the more interesting on the way to Wrestlemania and we could probably use some more stuff to build it up. Let’s get to it.

Here is No Way Out if you need a recap.

We open with a long video recapping Undertaker vs. Batista being set up, plus the No Way Out attack.

Michael Cole brings out Batista for a chat and if that was a heel turn (it wasn’t), it didn’t work. Batista isn’t going to need Cole as he talks about being familiar with Undertaker before he came to WWE. Undertaker is the Phenom and Batista has nothing but respect for him. That being said, he cannot apologize for what he did at No Way Out.

Undertaker chokeslammed him a few weeks ago, which is why Batista promised that payback is a b****. As far as Batista is concerned, they are even as they go into Wrestlemania. If it gets ugly, it gets ugly, but no one is disrespecting him. No matter what happens, Batista is leaving Wrestlemania as World Champion. Batista stayed to the point here and it worked.

We get a look at Rey Mysterio’s career, starting with his history with Eddie Guerrero.

Maryse, laid next to a fire, welcomes us back to the show.

Matt Hardy/Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Joey Mercury/Deuce and Domino

Ashley and Cherry are here too. Mercury drives Hardy into the corner and hammers away as JBL berates Cole for losing his voice at the pay per view. Hardy fights back and backdrops Mercury over the top onto Deuce and Domino, meaning London and Kendrick can start the double teaming. Domino finally offers a trip off the top though and it’s Deuce taking over with some knees to the ribs.

The chinlock goes on and it’s back to Domino to kick away. A double release gordbuster gets two with London making the save as we take a break. Back with Joey working on a waistlock but having to pull Kendrick down by the hair to cut off the comeback. Not that it matters as Kendrick gets over for the tag off to Hardy. House is cleaned for a bit as everything breaks down, including Hardy grabbing the Twist of Fate to finish Mercury.

Rating: C. I learned one thing from this match: I never need to see Hardy vs. Mercury in any form again. They aren’t interesting and they have been done to death at this point, so find something new for both of them to do already. London and Kendrick vs. Deuce and Domino isn’t there yet, but they should probably switch the titles already if they’re going to.

Vickie Guerrero has everything taken care of, though details are scarce.

We look at Edge qualifying for Money in the Bank.

Rey Mysterio won the 2006 Royal Rumble.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Non-title. Chavo knocks him into the ropes to start but gets caught with a hiptoss. A dropkick puts Chavo down again and Scotty hammers away in the corner. That earns him a dump over the top for a crash to the floor, meaning Scotty has to beat the count back in. Chavo cranks on both arms at the same time until Scotty fights up for a small package.

That earns him a big boot and we hit the abdominal stretch to keep Chavo in control. Scott fights out again and makes the clothesline comeback, though he does throw in a backdrop for a bonus. Chavo gets in Two Amigos but Scotty escapes the third, setting up the Worm. That’s enough to send Chavo outside so Scotty hits a running flip dive off the apron. Back in and Chavo grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the cheating pin.

Rating: C. These two had a nice little match here as you wouldn’t have expected these two to get much time. Chavo is someone who has long since been established as a big name in the division so he isn’t going to lose much by being in trouble against Scotty for a bit. Good enough here as Chavo gets to brag about a win and Scotty gets to do his biggest stuff.

Raw Rebound.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Kane vs. King Booker

Falls Count Anywhere and Queen Sharmell is here with Booker. Kane gets pounded down into the corner to start but comes right back with his assortment of uppercuts. They head outside with Kane dropping him onto the barricade for two and they’re back inside in a hurry. Booker hammers away in the corner again so Kane hits him in the face. Kane adds a knee to the ribs and falls down by mistake, allowing Booker to get in a shot of his own.

It’s time to go back outside with Kane being sent face first into various things. Back in and Kane ducks a bell shot to the face, meaning it’s another trip to the floor so Booker can get sent into hard objects. Booker DDTs him on the stage for two but Kane is fine enough to beat him back to ringside. Sharmell’s distraction allows Booker to get in a bell shot to send us to a break, because a bell shot isn’t the end of the match.

Back with Booker working on the arm and getting two off the hook kick to the face. Kane gets tossed outside, where he grabs a chair to smash Booker in the head for two. Back in again and Kane hits some running clotheslines in the corner, setting up the side slam for two more. Booker sends him outside but dives into the chokeslam….and here is Great Khali to beat Kane down. Khali sends him through the barricade and leaves, allowing Booker to steal the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure who thought this needed nearly eighteen minutes but it set up Kane vs. Khali and gives Booker something to do at Wrestlemania. It felt like they didn’t know how to fill that much time as you can only go to the floor to brawl so many times and they went way over the quota here. It wasn’t bad, but it was long and overstayed its welcome.

Post break, Khali comes up to Booker for a handshake. Khali leaves so celebrating can ensue.

We look at Ashley’s Playboy cover reveal.

Rey Mysterio forced JBL to retain.

Finlay/Leprechaun vs. Boogeyman/Little Boogeyman

No Way Out rematch and there is no Leprechaun to start. He does pop up from under the ring skirt in fear and we take a break. We come back joined in progress with Finlay working on the arm….and then stomping on the worms. Cole freaks out over said worms as Little Boogeyman hits Finlay low.

Now the Leprechaun comes in for the brawl until Boogeyman and Finlay come in to take out the counterparts. Finlay hits Boogeyman with the Shillelagh and the Leprechaun hits a jumping DDT for the pin. This was nuts in a good way, with JBL freaking out over Cole cheering for Rey to beat him in the clip before the match making it even better.

Maryse, with champagne and in very limited clothing, welcomes us back to the show.

We look back at Batista’s opening speech.

Next week: Undertaker responds.

Here is Rey Mysterio, on a cane due to knee surgery, to the big hometown reception. It takes him the better part of a minute and a half to get in the ring and the wincing is strong. Rey talks about how great it is to be back in the ring, but it is even better to be back in his hometown. His rehab is ahead of schedule….and here is Vince McMahon to interrupt, with security following to surround the ring. Vince talks about how big of a star he is and brags about Wrestlemania, even though Rey can’t be there.

We hear about the Battle of the Billionaires with Vince promising to humiliate Donald Trump and shave him bald. Vince can’t wait to make Trump squeal (that’s good for a shiver) and pull his hair out by the roots. We should get Rey’s opinion on this, so Vince drops to a knee to ask Rey, who thinks Vince is a loser.

That’s fine with Vince, who brings out Umaga to meet Rey. Cole and JBL don’t seem to get what is happening here as Vince asks if Rey wants to change his pick. Then Vince hits Rey low and the beating is on, including a splash to the bad leg. Rey gets stretchered out to end the show. The hometown curse strikes again and it shouldn’t be much of a surprise. At least we got to hear about Trump on Smackdown this time for a change of pace.

Overall Rating: C-. This was one of those shows where they kind of slowed the pace down and got us ready for next week when Undertaker will be back to get us to the next big thing. Outside of Batista vs. Undertaker, we don’t have much going on in the way of Smackdown exclusives. Maybe that can be fixed up, but I’m not sure what exactly could be added. Smackdown isn’t exactly heavy in feuds, but they still have a long time to go before Wrestlemania to figure something out.

 




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1993 (Original): Not So Fast

Summerslam 1993
Date: August 30, 1993
Location: Palace of Auburn Hills, Auburn Hills, Michigan
Attendance: 23,954
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Vince McMahon

Well, it’s a different time for the WWF now, as there’s no Warrior, no Hogan and Savage is commentating. This presents a big problem: there’s no one to lead the company as the top face. After Hogan bailed and never put Bret over which is something that I know isn’t for sure as to whom to blame, but something still isn’t sitting right with me about it, Bret was the top face by default. However, the top heel was Yokozuna, who beat Bret already.

Due to his size and allegedly (nonsense) the fact that Bret couldn’t have a good match with him, Lex freaking Luger of all people is turned face to try to slay the giant. This all happens on the Fourth of July weekend on the USS Intrepid where there was a body slam contest. No one can manage to slam Zuna, and the contest allegedly ends.

OR DOES IT?

A helicopter lands on the boat and the fans chant for Hogan. Nope, not him. Macho Man? Already made an attempt. Ultimate Warrior? One last guess. …Andre the Giant? He’s already dead, so no one knows. It’s….Lex Luger? Yes, it’s Flexy Lexy, the guy that had been a pompous jerk of a heel since the day he got there. Apparently he’s now very proud to be an American and he wants to stand up for America and slam the AMERICAN Samoan.

Of course he does it to a huge pop and an instant mega face push. However, Yoko doesn’t want to give him a title match. So what’s a newly top face to do? Rent a bus and drive around the country of course! Yes, Luger comes up with the Lex Express and drives around the country meeting fans like he’s trying to win the 1872 Presidential election. It’s somehow dumber than it sounds as Luger even has a theme song called I’ll Be Your Hero.

This may in fact be the most obnoxious thing that has even been attempted by Vince McMahon. There’s pushing someone down our throats, and then there’s this. The one problem: Luger never won the belt. He never even pinned Yoko that I recall. He was supposed to get the epic win at Mania 10, but he got drunk at a bar the night before and blabbed the plans to everyone, so there was a last second change and Bret got the title to close Mania 10, leading to his real reign with the belt.

Luger was gone in about a year, running back to WCW where people got closer to caring about him. This is the first encounter with him and Yoko. Other than that, there’s really nothing going on at all. Bret and Lawler are finally starting their two year feud so that’s kind of the second big match on the card I guess. Let’s get to this.

Our opening is…a music video of Lex Luger and his trip around America. He wears stars and stripes shirts and sleeps with a folded up American flag in his arms. This actually could have been an epic victory for him, had he you know, WON THE FREAKING BELT! That’s what makes this look so bad in hindsight: he never won the title. Had he done that, it’s the payoff for all the over the top nature of this angle.

Ted DiBiase vs. Razor Ramon

The Million Dollar Man was done on PPV after this, injuring his neck early in 1994 and being forced to immediately retire. Razor here is mad over as he’s getting that big push that he’s most known for. Coming soon: the IC Title feud with Shawn that got Shawn his jump up the ladder and yes that was intentional. This is over DiBiase offering Razor a job as a servant and Razor having that pesky pride of his.

It’s cool because I reviewed the go home show of Raw a few weeks ago so I actually know some of the buildup for these matches, or at least what there is of it. Anyway, this is probably Razor’s biggest match to date. DiBiase is looking a bit chubby here. This match is really just kind of boring. DiBiase dominates for the majority of the match, which isn’t saying much as it runs about seven and a half minutes total.

It’s mainly just slow paced and standard DiBiase stuff which is fine as he’s always very solid, but the fans are just dead for this. Now near the end of the match, Ted takes the cover off of the buckle and gets slammed into it, leading to the Razor’s Edge. The crowd is losing it for this as I hardly ever remember seeing a crowd go from dead to insane that fast. Naturally this is the end of the match, and the end of DiBiase’s time in the ring.

While he was certainly far from his prime, he was hardly falling apart out there. His stuff was solid, but it might be good that he got out when he did, given the new direction the company was going in. I’m not saying he wouldn’t have had a place, but his style is slower and more thought out than what was wanted in the new era. It’s sad to see one of the greats have to go, especially when two days ago he was with his time as GM of Raw.

Rating: C-. It was a bit boring and that hurts it a lot. DiBiase was there to put Razor over and that’s exactly what he did, so points for that. Razor was on the rise and this was another match that put him over even more.

Todd Pettingill (the man that replaced Sean Mooney) is with the family of the Steiners, which is cool I think. He’s interrupted by Jim Cornette in the ring.

Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Heavenly Bodies

Steiners are the home town boys so their pop is of course epic. Now the Heavenly Bodies are an interesting subject. They were the Dudleys of Cornette’s Smokey Mountain Wrestling, meaning that they were the undisputed biggest thing there, but unlike the Dudleys, that didn’t translate in the big companies. As for SMW, that place rocked. All kinds of guys were there and a lot of them got over because of their work there.

Guys like Lance Storm, Kane, Jericho and Foley mixed with some veterans, some local guys and Cornette calling the shots, and how can you go wrong? The problem was the business as a whole was in deep trouble at that point and Cornette, while being successful to an extent, only lasted about four years. However, in those four years he co-promoted with Vince, which was a pretty big deal at the time. SMW could have worked very well, if the timing and business as a whole had been better.

Even still, it did quite well all things considered. Big brawl starts as the heels take over early but the Steiners start taking over as Scott takes over and dominates which is always fun to watch. He was the prototype for what the modern day athlete was supposed to be but due to what has to be steroid abuse, he’s now a shell of his former self. Cornette has a neck brace on for no reason at all.

Eventually the heels take over on Scott and you can put the rest together from there. We go to the melee with Rick taking over to fight off the forces of evil as the fans are freaking out for the hometown boys. After Rick gets his with the tennis racket and Scott saves him the Frankensteiner ends it.

Rating: B-. This was fine. It’s nothing special and was just a token defense but is that really a bad thing for the hometown boys? I certainly don’t think so. It’s about 10 minutes and the faces were in a bit of trouble, so what more can you ask for out of this? Solid little match that did its job well.

We go to some guy named Joe Fowler who is a new interviewer that I don’t ever remember again. He’s with Shawn and Diesel and asks about how Shawn can’t hold onto the belt and that Diesel got it back for him from Perfect. Fowler actually wasn’t that bad at this and while he was a bit too perky, he wasn’t awful.

IC Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Shawn Michaels

This is the blowoff of the feud that had been built up……….4 months ago. The buildup for this match was nothing short of a masterpiece but by the time they got to the match the interest was pretty much long gone. I’ve never figured out why they waited but I’d assume an injury or something like that. Either way it was a bad idea for waiting so long as it could have been the hottest feud in the business at the time.

Anyway, this is your main midcard match of the show. Perfect, even probably past his prime, still just rocks on all levels. We get a plug for Radio WWF out of nowhere which was one of the oddest ideas I’ve ever heard of. Ross and Monsoon would call the show on the radio. Heenan apparently gets hit in the eye by something and isn’t happy about it. Very fast sequence to start and it of course ends in a botch as I have no idea who did what or what they were going for but it looked absolutely horrid.

Anyway, they go into a standard sequence as they jockey for position and Heenan talks about how Diesel will be the big factor here. This referee counts WAY too fast. If he had worked for WCW they would have won the wars. After they go to the floor, Shawn lands a stiff thrust kick to Perfect’s chin. That kick was so sweet that it was almost like music. Shawn continues his perfect streak of being too loud about calling spots which gets annoying after awhile but is part of the business.

I’m kind of skipping over a lot but a good match makes me do that. There’s little to complain about here which makes it hard to come up with jokes. Perfect hits a move that I always thought would be insanely hard to pull off: a running dropkick. That just looks hard to do and makes Perfect look even better. The ending to this is just flat out bad. Perfect gets the Perfectplex but Diesel pulls him outside and they start fighting in what could have been a very interesting feud.

Anyway, Shawn jumps at Perfect but he gets punched for his efforts. Shawn rolls in and lands on the referee, breaking up the count, but after Diesel rams Perfect’s shoulder/head area into the post, the referee continues his count and we get a count out. That was either a botch or running out of time, either way it didn’t work.

If you want to do the screwjob finish then let Diesel interfere and let Shawn get the pin but don’t just go with the count out. Post match Perfect gets the double beatdown and Shawn says he’s the greatest IC Champion.

Rating: B-. This was a very fun albeit short match. This really could have been something good with more time and a finish. That being said it was far from bad with one pretty bad botch that was at least in the beginning of the match. It just was too short and I hated the ending though.

Fowler is with the 1-2-3 Kid who says he’s nervous but ready. Again, Fowler is too perky but he seems solid enough.

IRS vs. 1-2-3 Kid

This is the other feud that comes from DiBiase vs. Razor. Kid was the indy darling at the time and when he got signed what would become the IWC exploded in excitement. What the heck happened to this guy? He became so completely worthless later in his career. Kid was Colin Delaney of his day, but unlike Colin, Kid actually had some skill and would win some matches. He was also far less annoying.

This is really short and not that interesting as even the commentators don’t want to talk about it as you can hear. The big deal about it is that the fans make fun of IRS’ name. Eventually he hits a clothesline of all things to get the pin. That’s really the best they can come up with? Heenan makes some dumb jokes to end this.

Rating: F. No one cared, it wasn’t interesting, and it sucked. What kind of grade did you expect here?

Todd is with Bret’s family, namely Owen, who is rocking one of the worst mullets ever, and Bruce. Stu had knee surgery and can’t be there tonight. They talk about the Hart/Lawler feud, which leads us to this.

Bret Hart vs. Jerry Lawler

This is for the title (more like name) of undisputed king of the ring. There’s no real title or anything which is good. Bret is one of 12. DAng Stu was tearing it up yo. Lawler is on crutches as he comes out. Todd asks him what’s going on. Apparently he’s injured. Gee you think? Never would have been able to figure that out without the crutches, the ice pack on the knee or the limp. The heel heat that he gets is so basic and so good that it’s uncanny.

Lawler blames his injury on his car as he talks forever. Apparently he’s not allowed to wrestle here tonight. Vince is ticked off over this. Imagine, a guy changing the match at the last second, especially one over a knee injury in a Bret Hart match. Yep, Vince has every right to be upset. Instead, he’s going to let his court jester fight Bret instead. This leads to…

Bret Hart vs. Doink the Clown

This was random as all goodness. Doink had been just beating up jobbers and all of a sudden he’s fighting a former world champion at Summerslam? This made no sense and I’m still not sure why they picked him. He does his confetti/water trick, which leads to one of the dumbest things I’ve ever seen at a wrestling show. He throws water on Bruce Hart, so Owen easily opens the railing up and walks through to ringside.

That’s a GREAT lesson to teach people: how to get past the guardrail. Anyway of course Bret is ticked off and beating on Doink early. The clown was such a great gimmick that it’s unreal. Think of the Joker from Batman and make him a wrestler. There’s Doink. This incarnation of him was someone that was a great wrestler that hid behind clown makeup because he was so mentally disturbed. How great of an idea is that?

He dominates most of the match which is Bret at his best: getting beaten up. Doink even puts an STFU on Bret as the young John Cena eats a sausage. He puts the Stump Puller on Bret and grabs the top rope for “additional leverage”. I get home sometimes that would help, but how in this case would that help?

Maybe I’m just missing something but I don’t see it at all. Here’s Bret’s comeback and you can connect the dots yourself here. Sharpshooter goes on, but GASP, Lawler comes in and hits Bret with the crutch! WHO THOUGHT THAT WOULD HAPPEN? Vince’s commentary here is hilarious as he’s panicking over this, thinking that such a thing could never happen.

Rating: B. This was actually pretty good. The in ring work with both guys was solid as Doink really was good in the ring, or at least until he turned face just after this match. Bret of course was great and Lawler made himself look evil here, continuing the feud that wouldn’t end until Summerslam 1995.

The heels head to the back but WAIT! JACK MOTHER TUNNEY is here to stop them! That leads us to this.

Bret Hart vs. Jerry Lawler

This is going to be quick. What are you expecting here? It’s maybe 5 minutes long and it’s Bret beating the tar out of him, a short heel dominance and a Sharpshooter for the tap out. The main thing here though is that Bret leaves the hold on for OVER THREE MINUTES as apparently he wants Lawler’s grandkids to have knee problems. A small army of suits and referees get rid of him but naturally the decision is reversed to give it to Lawler. Owen’s cowboy boots are making me crack up with laughter.

Rating: B+. It was Bret beating up his enemy which is always fun to see. That’s just not something you can’t beat as Lawler is such a great cowardly heel that working with Bret was perfect. The post match thing made you believe Lawler’s career was over, but this feud would go on for two years, on and off.

We see a promo from Borga, talking about how Luger is stupid for wanting to save America when it has slums like the one he’s in. This was I guess on location in inner Detroit.

Bret and co. says it’s not over with Lawler.

Ludvig Borga vs. Marty Jannetty

Oh dear this is going to be bad isn’t it? Borga is just a beast that was only there about 8 months before being let go for no apparent reason. It was rumored that he would take the title from Taker (not sure where he would have gotten it, maybe at the Rumble?) and then lose it to Luger at Mania 10. I’ve never heard any concrete plans on that but I’ve heard rumors similar to that too many times to not think there’s at least some credibility to them.

Marty of course has his head handed to him here as the Finn is a boxer and just punches Marty’s ribs into oblivion. This is a pure squash here and Marty lands a couple of super kicks that meant nothing at all. Borga’s finisher was the torture rack, which I would have nearly died of laughter from if he’d beaten Luger with.

Rating: D+. It’s a squash and a long, drawn out one. Marty was ok in the ring I guess, but this was better suited for a Raw or something I think. Ludvig would dominate jobbers for a few months before being placed in a real feud, but the ankle injury was too much for him and for some reason he got let go. It was one injury. I’ve never gotten why he never came back.

Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez

This is a Rest In Peace match which means street fight. This is the blow off match that no one really wanted to see. The Giant had run in at the Rumble to beat up Taker on behalf of Harvey Whipleman, who I still need clarification on whether or not he’s a human being. They had the worst Taker Mania match ever (not Taker’s fault) and they waited 4 months to have the rematch….for no apparent reason.

No transition at all as Borga’s music is still playing as Fink is announcing. Was there really a point to the caveman look? I never got that. Oh, for the 100th time someone has stolen the urn. The pop for Taker is epic of course. I’m starting to get the reason why Taker got so big so fast, among the obvious reasons: Bobby Heenan. The things Heenan would say about Taker made him just awesome sounding.

As soon as the gong strikes, Bobby says: “See ya!” That’s such a tiny thing but it works so well. He’d always do that and it would always work. No Paul Bearer for no apparent reason. We’ve clearly seen that Gonzalez is taller and that Taker is walking normally, yet Vince says Taker is towering above all and gliding to the ring. Vince, pay attention please. Heenan: I bet Johnny Cash has a picture of him in his pocket. Norcal will love that line.

Apparently Bearer being gone has been the case for awhile now. This is a lot better than at Mania, mainly because Gonzalez has figured out a bit more of his own style and isn’t as horrible as he was before. Also the lack of rules suit them both better in a match like this. Taker looks tiny which is saying a lot. It’s mainly back and forth with Taker continuously reaching for the urn “like it’s a tag partner.” Eventually Bearer returns with a black wreath.

Whippleman and Bearer “fight”, resulting in Bearer getting the urn back. Heenan says NO NO NO, Bearer says OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSS! Taker sits up of course and it’s on. Taker hits about 5 clotheslines before hitting one from the top to get the pin. Gonzalez I guess turns face after the match by beating up Harvey. That went nowhere.

Rating: C+. This was FAR better than what they did back in April. The rule changes saved this along with the shorter match. It just flowed much better and looked more like something these two would do, as it was a brawl and not a match. Not great, but compared to what they had done before, this was Savage vs. Steamboat.

Fowler is with Yoko, Fuji and Cornette. Cornette says his typical great heel stuff here and puts over Yoko.

Smoking Guns/Tatanka vs. Bam Bam Bigelow/Headshrinkers

Yeah to put it mildly this is filler. The Guns were pretty new at this point. It’s great to see the cowboys and Indian getting along so well here. Ross and Monsoon are on radio here. Ah it’s for the Armed Forces Network. I can live with that. SHAWN MICHAELS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING! Samu and Tatanka start us off. Heenan makes fun of the Cleveland Indians and Dallas Cowboys, which makes me be irritated.

Both Tatanka and Bigelow go for cross bodies at the same time which is a weird looking visual but it worked rather well.  Billy punches Rikishi and gets kicked in the face as a result. Why couldn’t he have been kicked out of the company instead? Vince insists they are REAL cowboys. Oh dear. Samu kicks him into the corner to get a tag to Bart.

Crowd is DEAD of course. Bigelow hits a dropkick to take him down for two. Not quick Jim Nedihart’s but close enough. This is just boring beyond belief. It’s like a long Superstars match rather than a long TV match which is REALLY bad for 93 standards. Bigelow rams Bart’s head into Fatu’s which is rather funny.

Bart dodges and Bigelow hits the post so that Tatanka can come in and hopefully end this nonsense. Slam to Bigelow which is kind of impressive. Top rope cross body gets two. Tatanka starts up his racial stereotypes and Bigelow just hits him to stop such idiocy. A triple headbutt hits but a triple splash misses so Tatanka can roll up Fatu for the pin.

Rating: F+. That triple splash was cool looking but this was AWFUL. Like I said, total Superstars match here and nothing more. Horribly boring match and no one cared at all.

We interview Luger’s bus driver. Let me repeat that. We interview Luger’s bus driver. He has a monitor and is watching Summerslam from inside the bus. That….might be the funniest thing I’ve seen since Summerslam began. Yeah, it is. He’s driven Lex around the country for 2 months and he can’t get a bleacher seat to the show? He talks about how great Luger is in what might not have been scripted. He’s talking like this is a real thing, so either he’s not scripted or he needs a job in WWF.

Fowler does something that I like here: he says he’s going to ask a stupid question. Can I get a Hallelujah chorus? We have an interviewer that knows he asks stupid questions. WHY DID THIS GUY LEAVE???

Todd interviews some of the fans.

To further shove the red white and blue down our throats, there are American flags sitting on top of the commentators.

In something else that makes me laugh. Fink asks for the fans to please rise. He gets booed. He then asks if the people will show some respect. When did Fink become a heel manager? The Japanese national anthem is sung. We have a master of ceremonies for the main event, and for no reason at all, it’s Randy Savage. He brings out some guy to sing the National Anthem. Savage looks like the Incredible Hulk meets the Uncle Sam poster.

WWF Title: Lex Luger vs. Yokozuna

And here we go. Yoko’s entrance takes FOREVER. Luger of course gets the pop of pops as he enters to Stars and Stripes Forever. This is easily one of Yoko’s best matches ever. Luger wasn’t much, but he could fight big guys with the best of them. His power game worked perfectly against Yoko, and when it’s USA vs. the evil foreigner, it’s hard to mess it up. WWF managed to screw up the ending, but not the match.

I can sum up this whole match with ease: Bobby Heenan praises Lex Luger. Heenan, perhaps the greatest heel manager of all time, is praising a face. Luger kicks out of everything but never quite hulks up. The crowd is red hot the whole match, which runs nearly 18 minutes for easily one of Yoko’s longest. He’s moving really well here as he hadn’t ballooned to his massive girth yet. The idea is that Yoko simply can’t put him away no matter how close he gets but he can’t hit the Drop either.

They beat on each other with Luger making comeback after comeback but never being able to slam Yoko. After Heenan is losing his voice, Luger makes his final comeback and “slams” Yoko. Heenan screams that it was a hip block, which is actually more impressive as you’re slamming someone using one arm instead of two, but who am I to poke at the Brain? Now, we get to the ending, which for the life of me might be the stupidiest thing I’ve ever seen.

Luger hits the steel forearm and knocks Yoko out of the ring and out cold, drawing the count out. Why? What in the world was the point of not giving Luger the belt here? The tag line of the show was “Someone has to stop him” with a picture of Yoko Banzai Dropping the American flag. Dude, this was a layup and they blew it. Seriously, why would you not give Luger the belt in this case?

He was wildly over, he had a whole storyline that lasted all summer, and the buildup was perfect for that Hogan/Andre moment. However, they waited 8 months to give Luger another shot and in between Luger feuded with Yoko and Fuji’s team still. Why not give him the belt here? For the life of me I do not understand this booking.

Luger may not be a great worker but the fans were WAY into him and the storyline would have been perfect. Anyway, of course we have balloons and confetti falling as Luger and Savage celebrate winning nothing to go off the air.

Rating: B-. This is a fine example of a match that needs two ratings, one for the match and one for the ending. The match was actually pretty good but the ending makes no sense at all. I’ve ranted on it already so I’ll spare you another one here. Yoko looked excellent here and far better than usual.

Luger was feeling it out there as this was one of his better matches, despite using his old stuff. In this case it worked and the crowd was hyped. Very good match that if it had a legitimate finish could have saved the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show just sucks. Nothing of note happens, the matches are just head scratchers, and the ending is AWFUL. The show just has nothing huge happening at all as Bret’s matches were a combination of solid but random and short but intense. Taker was a feud that I though ended half a year ago. Shawn’s match was good but forgettable, and I’ve ranted on the main event already. Just a bad show overall which is reflective of the company as a whole at this point. Avoid this.

 

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