Wrestlemania XXXVII Night Two
Date: April 11, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Ashland Craft

It’s time for the second half of the show and hopefully it is just as good if not better than last night. This time we have the main event of Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Daniel Bryan and Edge, along with four more title matches. That should make this feel more like a complete Wrestlemania, though I’m still not sure on whether I like one or two nights better. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

America the Beautiful, with the roster on the stage.

We get the same opening video from last night, again with the Captain Jack Sparrow impersonator though with some fresh visuals.

Here are Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan to get things going….and they’re in pirate costumes. They make pirate jokes and the fans do not seem overly interested as we are thrown to our first match.

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

Fiend has been tormenting Orton so Orton burned him alive. Now the charred remains of the Fiend are back for revenge. Orton is in white gear in a look I don’t remember seeing before. We see Fiend walking through the hall backstage and he transforms from the burned version into the regular one. Before Fiend appears, here’s Alexa Bliss with a huge jack in the box on the floor (it goes above the top rope). She turns the crank and the Fiend pops out of the box like the boss in a fairly creative game.

Fiend jumps off of the box and clotheslines Orton down as the red lights are back. A release Rock Bottom plants Orton and Fiend shouts what sounds like YOWIE WOWIE. Fiend loads up his own Punt but Orton bails out to the floor. That’s fine with Fiend, who follows him out with the Mandible Claw. Orton rolls inside for the break and there’s the hanging DDT to drop Fiend for all of two seconds.

The RKO is countered so Orton sends him into the side of the box (“box like structure” according to Cole) and there’s another DDT. Fiend is back up with the crossbody and right hands so Orton sends him outside again. That means a third DDT and this time Fiend stays down for a bit. The RKO is countered into the Mandible Claw and Sister Abigail is loaded up….but fire comes out of the posts. Bliss is sitting on top of the box with the black goo all over her. Fiend is distracted enough that the RKO can finish him at 5:54.

Rating: D. And I thought the bugs on the mat were never going to be topped. The Fiend gets to lose to Orton again in another idea that probably sounded great on paper but since this company doesn’t get that there is more to it than that, this is what we get. I don’t know if they’re going with the beauty killed the beast idea or something like that, but good grief man. Is it asking too much for Fiend to be able to get a bit win without doing something stupid? Awful stuff again, and hopefully they get it out of the way here.

Post match Fiend stares at Bliss and the lights go out. When they come back up, both of them are gone.

Bayley comes up to Hulk Hogan, Titus O’Neil and Eric Bischoff as they talk about Sasha Banks and Bianca Belair. She offers Bischoff a spot on her show but Bischoff would rather have Belair on. Hogan and Bischoff leave to talk about Hogan’s new boat, though Titus does give Bayley his pirate hat.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Natalya/Tamina vs. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler

Natalya/Tamina are defending after winning Tag Team Turmoil last night. Natalya and Shayna go to the mat to start and it’s an early standoff. Nia comes in and wants Tamina, who gets what I hope are ironic cheers. Tamina’s headbutt sets up an unsuccessful slam attempt so it’s back to Natalya to take Shayna down. A catapult sends Shayna into a superkick from Tamina for two.

Shayna is back up with a knee to Natalya’s face as Jax beats up Tamina on the floor. It’s time to start in on Natalya’s leg, including a nasty stomp to twist the ankle around. Nia comes in to stay on the knee and we get some of the trademark Natalya screaming. A missed charge sends Nia shoulder first into the post but she is back up with a spinebuster with Tamina having to make the save.

The hot tag brings in Tamina (which they miss on the first try because they can’t even SLAP HANDS properly) and the pace picks up. Tamina blocks the Kirifuda Clutch is straight power and Samoan drops Shayna for two. Shayna catches Tamina on top but Natalya breaks up a super Samoan drop from Nia. That sets up a double high crossbody to give Nia two, though she seems to bang up her knee in the process.

Nia shouts at Tamina a lot so Tamina backhands her in the face. A slam (with less rotation than Lex Luger got on Yokozuna) plants (kind of) Jax for two and we get a TAMINA chant because wresting fans are annoying. The Superfly Splash misses and it’s Natalya and Shayna coming back in, with Natalya dropkicking Shayna first. The Sharpshooter has Nia in trouble but Baszler grabs the Kirifuda Clutch on Natalya to retain at 14:21.

Rating: D. What does it say that I’m relieved Nia Jax is still a champion? This went WAY too long as WWE will not give up on the idea of Tamina and Natalya being something. The match was completely uninteresting because of who was in there and it isn’t like the action was very good either. Awful match, as WWE continues to not have the first clue of how to use these titles.

We recap Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn. Sami has been going a little bit nuts because he is convinced that there is a huge conspiracy against him. Owens does not seem to buy it but Zayn has even brought in YouTube sensation Logan Paul, who doesn’t quite seem to buy Sami’s conspiracy theory. Paul is here tonight in an undefined role.

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

It’s pretty awesome that these two are getting to face each other at Wrestlemania. Sami comes out first and introduces Paul, who does not seem that popular. Owens plants him with a Pop Up Powerbomb at the bell so Sami rolls outside. That means Sami has to grab the ropes to avoid an apron powerbomb. Sami gets dropped ribs first across the top rope and there’s the Cannonball to crush him again.

The threat of Owens going to the top sends Sami outside again but this time he catches Owens with a brainbuster on the apron for a big reaction (egads). Back in and the Michinoku Driver (Cole calls it a Blue Thunder Bomb, but Graves “saves him from the internet” by correcting him. Cole: “Thanks Corey. I got enough of that last night.”) gives Sami two so he puts Owens on top.

Some headbutts send Sami flying and the frog splash gives Owens two of his own. A fisherman’s buster onto the knee knocks Zayn silly for two more but ht he’s right back with the exploder suplex into the corner. The Helluva Kick and Stunner both miss so Sami grabs the Blue Thunder Bomb for two. Another exploder sets up a nasty half and half suplex to rock Owens and the brainbuster gets another near fall.

Sami takes him up again and gets countered into the swinging fisherman’s superplex to crush Zayn and have Paul slumped over in his chair. Back up and Sami hits the Helluva Kick but makes the mistake of trying another one, allowing Owens to hit a superkick. Another superkick sets up the Stunner to pin Zayn at 9:17.

Rating: B-. A lot of what made this work was just seeing Owens vs. Zayn at Wrestlemania. These two have one of the deepest histories in modern wrestling and it must be so special to them to get to do this. Good match too, with Owens getting a win like he deserves after having such a great series with Reigns. Also, thanks for getting the show on track after the awful first hour.

Post match Paul checks on Sami as he gets up so Sami yells a lot and reminds Paul that Owens is the enemy. Paul shoves him down and storms off so Paul raises Owens’ hand. The Stunner leaves him laying so Owens can hug his family. Paul is helped out and asks why Owens did that.

Riddle runs into Great Khali and congratulates him on the Hall of Fame. He thinks Khali should open a store for giant sized people and sell giant toilets and scooters. There seems to be a communication issue so Rob Van Dam comes in to act as a translator. Van Dam says Khali says they need to dominate the market share with good marketing ideas, so Van Dam recommends his brand of rolling papers (to a big pop).

US Title: Sheamus vs. Riddle

Riddle is defending after Sheamus attacked him with Riddle’s own scooter a few weeks back. One day someone is going to have to explain the birds on Riddle’s entrance. Sheamus takes him down with a headlock takeover to start and stomps away but Riddle is back up with a choke on Sheamus’ back. That’s broken up and the swinging Rock Bottom plants Riddle again.

The Irish Curse connects but Riddle is back up with some shots to the face. Sheamus knocks him back and goes up so Riddle catches him with a top rope flipping belly to belly superplex. Some running forearms set up the exploder into the Broton into the Jackhammer for two (he can’t let the Goldberg stuff go) on Sheamus and Riddle is stunned. The Bro Derek is broken up and Sheamus sends him to the apron. Riddle flips back in for a knee to the face (looked like it was supposed to be the Brogue Kick, as Cole called it) for two.

An Alabama Slam gets two on Riddle, who is right back up with a suplex to the floor. The Floating Bro drops Sheamus again and they head back inside. Another Floating Bro gets two but Sheamus knocks him back again. Sheamus goes up top so Riddle follows him, only to have Sheamus load up a super White Noise.

That’s a bit too much though as they slip off, leaving Sheamus to hit the regular White Noise. Sheamus adds a top rope knee for two (proving that Riddle is tougher than Bruno Sammartino) so Riddle tries another springboard flip, which is Brogue Kicked out of the air (in some great timing) to give Sheamus the pin and the title at 10:49.

Rating: B-. These guys beat the heck out of each other, though some of the spots didn’t quite connect as planned. The ending made up for a lot of that though and while I’m not wild on Riddle’s short reign, Sheamus absolutely deserves something after his great run run with Drew McIntyre. Solid midcard match between two hard hitting guys, though I’m not sure where Riddle goes from here. Sheamus isn’t likely a long term champion, but him putting someone over will be a good moment.

HHH gives Bad Bunny a golden microphone to start his world tour.

We recap Big E. vs. Apollo Crews for the Intercontinental Title. Big E. won the title on Christmas night and defeated Crews to retain it. Crews thinks there have been shenanigans so he attacked Big E. Then Crews embraced his Nigerian roots and gained an accent, a scarf and a spear. Then Big E. beat Crews to retain it so Crews thought there had been shenanigans so he attacked Big E. Now it’s a Nigerian Drum Fight, which seems to be another hardcore match, in Big E.’s hometown.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Big E. is defending in a Nigerian Drum Fight, meaning anything goes and you can only win by pin or submission. Wale performs Big E.’s entrance live for a bonus. Big E. looks rather emotional and has a Feeding Tampa Bay (charity) logo on his entrance gear. Commentary explains that this has nothing to do with percussion instruments, but rather beating your opponent like a drum, though there is a gong at ringside.

There are also various weapons, including some kendo sticks, with both of them grabbing one to beat on the other. Big E. gets the better of it and they head outside, where there are indeed drums. A superkicks gets Crews a breather and he sends Big E. into the gong. Back in and Big E. spears Crews through the ropes to the floor and it’s time to pick some new weapons. Crews knocks him down and puts Big E. onto the steps. He picks up the other half and goes to the apron to crush Big E. but only hits steps.

Big E. is back up with a release Rock Bottom off the apron and onto the steps for a rather disturbing thud. A table is set up but it takes a bit too long, allowing Crews to hammer away with a kendo stick. The frog splash through the table only hits table though, allowing Big E. to nail the Big Ending. Cue a giant (Dabba Kato of Raw Underground fame) in something like a military uniform to beat Big E. down though, including a chokeslam. The giant puts Crews on top for the pin and the title at 6:50.

Rating: C+. They beat each other up well enough here and the title change was a nice moment, but Big E. being the latest star to have the big moment in his hometown is rather depressing. I’m not sure what WWE’s obsession with that is but it gets a little tiring. Also, for those keeping track, this is the second night in a row where a member of New Day has lost a title in the fourth match of the show thanks to a giant hitting something like a chokeslam.

Video on the first night of Wrestlemania.

Hall of Fame ceremony video.

The Hall of Fame class is presented:

Molly Holly

Great Khali

Ozzy Osbourne (not here)

Eric Bischoff

Rob Van Dam

Rich Hering (Warrior Award)

Kane (gets the headliner entrance)

We recap Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley for the Raw Women’s Title. Asuka has been champion for most of the last year and Ripley debuted to challenge her. Not much more to it than that and it really doesn’t need to.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Asuka

Ripley is challenging and gets played to the ring live by Ash Costello. Asuka starts fast by kicking her into the corner and then counters a charge into a drop toehold into the middle buckle. That’s enough to send Ripley outside for a breather so Asuka follows her out with a knee to the face. Back in and Asuka kicks Ripley in the back as it seems Ripley is a bit shaken up by the pressure to start.

Ripley gets in her own kick and a belly to back faceplant gets two. The fans are split here as Ripley grabs a bodyscissors and shouts about how much she wants this. That’s broken up and Ripley slows the pace for some hard clotheslines. Asuka counters a kick to the chest into a kneebar so Ripley goes with the power to muscle up into a German suplex. Some shoulders in the corner stay on Asuka’s back and Ripley takes her up top.

That can’t go well so Asuka knocks her down and nails a good missile dropkick. Asuka’s German suplex sets up the rapid fire strikes, capped off by the big kick to the head for two. Asuka goes up again but this time Ripley dropkicks her down, setting up a face first drop onto the apron (which thankfully doesn’t smudge Asuka’s eye makeup). They fight to the apron and Asuka grabs a DDT to the floor (GEEZ) with Ripley thudding hard. That gets seven, because dropping four feet from the apron to the floor and landing on your head isn’t worth an eight these days.

Back in and Asuka fires off the Kawada kicks but the sliding knee is countered into some stomps to the head. The Prism Trap is countered into an armbar but Ripley swings her into the corner for the break. A bottom rope superplex (you don’t see that every day) gets two on Asuka so she tries the Asuka Lock. That’s broken up so she misses Ripley’s head, allowing the Riptide to give Ripley the pin and the title at 14:15.

Rating: B-. Perfectly fine match, but there was no story coming in and the ending did kind of come out of nowhere. What matters here though is they got the winner right as Asuka has done just about everything she can with the title. Also, it was kind of nice to not have it be Charlotte giving Asuka a major loss for a change. Good match here, though not exactly a break the door down debut for Ripley.

We recap Fiend beating Randy Orton. That might not be the right thing to recap.

Here are Hulk Hogan and Titus O’Neil to thank the fans and everyone who made this possible but Bayley interrupts. She demands her thank you and pyro because she has been carrying this show on her back for the last two nights…..and here are the Bellas to interrupt. Bayley: “I don’t know what you heard, but John Cena is not here tonight!” Nikki slaps her and Brie gives her a facebuster as the fans are not pleased. Hulk and Titus dance with the Bellas to wrap it up.

Here’s what’s coming to Peacock, with the main focus on the Ruthless Aggression series.

We recap the main event of Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Edge and Daniel Bryan. Edge won the Royal Rumble after returning from another long term injury, but wasn’t happy that Daniel Bryan is complaining about not getting his own shot. Bryan won the Elimination Chamber and then had to face Reigns immediately, with Reigns winning in less than two minutes. Bryan wanted another shot and had Reigns tapping at Fastlane but guest referee Edge cost him the match after accidentally getting knocked down. Therefore, it’s a triple threat for the title.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Edge vs. Daniel Bryan

Reigns is defending and Edge gets a monster pop. Paul Heyman and Jey Uso, with the lei’s, are here with Reigns. We’re ready to go after the Big Match Intros and Reigns decks Bryan at the bell. Edge hammers on Reigns but Bryan is back up, only to be thrown outside. Uso drops Bryan on the floor and then does the same to Edge, leaving Reigns as the only one up. Reigns loads up the announcers’ table but Bryan is back up with the suicide dive.

Uso is right there to take both of them down though, earning himself a whip into the steps from Edge. Reigns gets posted too and Edge is the only one left standing. The Edgecution plants Uso on the steps and medics come in to take him out. That leaves Bryan to hurricanrana Edge off the top but Edge rolls him up for two. Reigns is back up on the apron so Bryan slides between his legs to pull him back to the floor.

Bryan’s missile dropkick hits Edge and he nips up but Reigns counters the suicide dive into an overhead belly to belly. Back in and Edge counters the Superman Punch into the Edgecution but loads up the spear instead f covering. The spear is cut off with a Superman Punch so Reigns loads up his own spear. That’s countered into a sunset flip for two, leaving them to both try spears at the same time and collide.

Bryan comes back in with a Swan Dive each with Reign having to kick out. Edge is knocked outside, leaving Bryan to stomp on Reigns’ head over and over. The YES Lock goes on (and Heyman’s eyes pop up) until Edge makes a save to give us a quick breather. Bryan YES Locks Edge with Reigns making a save this time, setting up a powerbomb to drive Bryan into Edge. Reigns isn’t done though as he takes Bryan outside for a powerbomb off the steps and through the announcers’ table, allowing Edge to spear Reigns off the steps for the three way knockdown.

Edge is up first and grabs a chair to knock Reigns down again. The Crossface, complete with a piece of the chair in Reigns’ mouth, has Reigns in trouble inside but Bryan comes in with a YES Lock to Reigns at the same time. Bryan and Edge headbutt the heck out of each other for the break so Bryan stomps on Edge’s head too. The running knee is countered by Edge’s spear though and another spear gets two on Reigns with Bryan having to pull the referee out.

Edge is incensed so he chairs Bryan in the back. The chair is taken inside so Edge can chair both of them over and over as the psycho eyes are back at full strength (he was always great at those). With both of them down, Edge loads up a pair of Conchairtos, because covering is a little too basic for him. The first Conchairto hits Bryan but Jey Uso is back in to save Reigns but Edge spears him down. Reigns spears Edge down and gives him a Conchairto for the double pin at 21:49.

Rating: A-. I really liked this and above all else, it came off as a Wrestlemania quality match and main event. I’m rather pleased with the ending as well, even if it seemed like the least likely result. You could feel all three as possible winners more than once and that is a great feeling to have. Awesome main event here and by far the best match of the two nights.

A lot of pyro and replays take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. The first hour really dragged this one down a lot but they did what they could to make up for it. The very good main event helped it a lot and allowed it to overcome a fairly weak middle of the show, but that first hour was the big problem. This one felt more like Wrestlemania than the first night, though the real version is somewhere between the two with some stuff cut out. It still isn’t a great Wrestlemania or even very close, but what we got was very good and I’ll take that after last year’s mostly forgotten show.

Overall Overall Rating: B. Two good halves make for a rather good weekend and it felt like WWE was back to normal, if only for two nights. I know it is time to go back to the Thunderdome (even the new one this time) but it was so nice to have things back to normal for a change. The wrestling was mostly (though not entirely) good and we had some memorable moments, though it is pretty clear that they need to fine tune the Wrestlemania formula again before Dallas. Still though, very enjoyable weekend and it made me smile about wrestling for the first time in a good while.

Results

Randy Orton b. The Fiend – RKO

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler b. Tamina/Natalya – Kirifuda Clutch to Natalya

Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Stunner

Sheamus b. Riddle – Brogue Kick

Apollo Crews b. Big E. – Chokeslam

Rhea Ripley b. Asuka – Riptide

Roman Reigns b. Daniel Bryan and Edge – Double pin

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Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Bebe Rexha

We’re finally back with fans for the first time in over a year. That’s hard to fathom but for the first time in forever it feels like a WWE show. The card is stacked, but really what matters most is being back to normal, because it has taken a long time to get here. I know it is just for the weekend, but after such a long wait, I’ll take whatever I can get. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon welcomes us to the show and, with the roster behind him, thanks the fans for sticking with them throughout the pandemic. For tonight though, WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA!

The set is awesome, with the pirate ship decorated in WWE flags and sails. I’m a big pirate fan so that’s very cool to see.

Bebe Rexha, with a woman playing guitar, sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is actually a sequel to last year’s, as we have the traditional opening statement about it being the start of a great voyage but the Jack Sparrow impersonator takes over to talk about how we need to correct course after last year. He also thanks the fans for coming out and we get a more traditional finish for the big grand finale. The original narrator approves.

We go to the stadium, which looks great….and there is a weather delay due to lightning. The commentary team says it is just going to be a little bit longer and recaps Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley.

Shane McMahon is ready to finish things with Braun Strowman and is ready to be back in front of fans.

MVP talks about how ready Bobby Lashley is and promises to end Drew McIntyre tonight. Drew McIntyre comes in and tells MVP to do it to his face. McIntyre says Mother Nature can’t save him and we’ll do it right here if we have to. Agents and referees break it up. MVP and Lashley leave and McIntyre talks about how he can’t wait to finally get his hands on Lashley after such a long wait.

The Kickoff Show hosts talk about McIntyre vs. Lashley.

New Day is ready for AJ Styles and Omos and are glad they registered as a new team. Big E. comes in and talks about how blessed we are to see these two do work.

Commentary dubs the show Wrestlerainia.

Braun Strowman says he is going to beat up Shane McMahon for everyone who has ever been called stupid.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about Vince McMahon opening the show.

Kevin Owens talks about meeting Sami Zayn in 2002. They did not know anyone more passionate about wrestling than the two of them and have wrestled each other around the world, from Canada to America to Peru to German and everywhere else. Throughout those twenty years, no two people were talked down to like they were. Tomorrow night (we get a weird buzzing sound over the audio here), they are going to get to do this on the biggest stage of them all, but it is not the Sami Zayn Owens has known for years.

Cole and Samoa Joe are in ponchos and say we are five minutes away. Byron Saxton is off to get another microphone after his died.

Bianca Belair is ready and knows that this is the biggest night of her life.

Seth Rollins, who thinks Kevin Patrick is named Mike, is ready for “Zazzaro” and promises the performance of a lifetime when he gets to trounce him once and for all.

Miz and John Morrison are ready for Bad Bunny and Damian Priest because they will never be as wet as Johnny Drip Drip.

Long video on Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre. Lashley won the WWE Title from the Miz, who cashed in Money in the Bank on McIntyre following a Lashley beatdown at Elimination Chamber. McIntyre is now getting his one on one rematch for the title. Commentary was bleeding over during the video.

Here are Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan to welcome us to the show, and to O’Neil’s city. They hype up the show, with Hogan talking about how amazing the Hurt Lock and Claymore are. You can see the rain dripping off of Titus as they hit the catchphrases to wrap it up.

WWE Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending and has MVP with him. Cole says to be a legend of Hall of Famer, you have to have held the title. We’ll ignore how ridiculous that is as they lock up to no avail. A hard shoulder puts McIntyre down but he’s right back up with the belly to belly. Lashley drives him up against the rope but McIntyre clotheslines him to the floor. They fight outside with Lashley sending him into the barricade as you can see all the water on the mats.

Back in and Lashley grabs a swinging neckbreaker for two but the running shoulder only hits post (that is WAY too popular of a spot these days). A cross armbreaker doesn’t work very well for McIntyre but a clothesline and elbow to the face do a bit better. There’s another belly to belly and a third sends Lashley flying again. A bridging northern lights suplex gives McIntyre two but Lashley plants him with the big spinebuster for the same.

McIntyre is right back with the reverse Alabama Slam out of the corner and it’s time to head up. Lashley crotches his way out of a superplex attempt so McIntyre grabs a quickly broken Kimura. Instead McIntyre does his situp out of the Tree of Woe to send Lashley flying again. Another spinebuster cuts McIntyre off again….and he pops right back up to stun Lashley. McIntyre channels his inner Scott Steiner with another belly to belly, followed by three straight Futureshocks for two.

The Claymore is loaded up but Lashley bails to the floor, only to have McIntyre bust out the big no hands flip dive to take out both Lashley and MVP. Back in and McIntyre misses coming off the top, meaning he gets caught in the Hurt Lock. That’s reversed with a ram into the corner and McIntyre grabs a Kimura. That’s broken up as well so McIntyre loads up the Claymore but MVP offers a distraction, allowing Lashley to grab the Hurt Lock. McIntyre tries to flip around but can’t even get out using the turnbuckle climb and Lashley retains at 18:24.

Rating: B-. This started slowly and then picked up a lot of steam near the end. Lashley retaining is absolutely the right call as there is no need for McIntyre to win the title again after most of a year of holding the thing. It would have been ridiculous to have Lashley lost the title after about five weeks so it was nice to see them do the right thing after a pretty hard hitting fight.

Bayley comes up to Hulk Hogan, Titus O’Neil and the NWO in the back but they aren’t interested in her offers of Too Sweet.

Tag Team Turmoil

Five teams and the winners get a Women’s Tag Team Title shot on night two. Naomi/Lana are in at #1 and Carmella/Billie Kay are in at #2 with Carmella hammering on Lana to start. Lana avoids a charge and gets over for the quick tag to Naomi to clean house. Everything breaks down and Billie gets a sunset flip on Naomi with an assist from Carmella for the pin.

The Riott Squad is in at #3 and Billie suplexes Morgan into a low superkick from Carmella for two. They try the same assisted sunset flip but this time Carmella gets caught (Carmella: “I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING!!!”). A Codebreaker into a top rope backsplash finishes Kay but Carmella drops Riott after the fall.

Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke are in at #4 with Mandy falling down on the ramp. An early Blockbuster gets two on Riott, who has to fight out of the corner and brings in Morgan. A Codebreaker into the Riott Kick (which seemed to miss) gets two on Mandy with Brooke making the save. It’s off to Brooke for a Swanton and a small package but Liv reverses it into one of own for the pin. After the ring announcer says the wrong team name, Natalya and Tamina are in at #5 to complete the field.

The Sharpshooter attempt is countered into a small package to give Liv two so Natalya plants her with a powerbomb. Tamina comes in and gets sent into the corner with Riott sending Morgan into her ribs. Back up and Tamina superkicks the heck out of Morgan and the Hart Attack to Riott set up the Superfly Splash to give Natalya and Tamina the pin at 14:05.

Rating: D. Of course they won. Of course they won. I still have no idea what the heck WWE sees in Natalya and Tamina but I’m sure a goat and a lot of drugs are involved. Now we get to see them again tomorrow for reasons I don’t want to understand. The match itself was nothing due to how fast they had to go and then we have a terrible result. Happy Wrestlemania everyone.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro in the form of a political ad against Cesaro, as paid for by Friends of Seth Rollins. Basically Cesaro has never done anything and Rollins is the kind of a leader we need. Also Rollins is mad because Cesaro Swung him 22 times a few months ago.

Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro

Cesaro jumps him fast to start and hammers away. Rollins tries to get up top but is caught with an uppercut but a gutwrench superplex is countered into a buckle bomb for two. Cesaro is sent to the apron so he goes up (while shaking off his right arm) but gets superplexed into a Falcon Arrow for two more. The uppercuts send Rollins into the corner where more uppercutting ensues.

A clothesline turns Rollins inside out for two and the threat of a Swing sends him to the ropes. Rollins is back up with an enziguri but the Stomp is countered into the Swing, with the crowd counting along. Cesaro stops at nine to put on the Sharpshooter but Rollins is right next to the rope. The Sling Blade sets up a spinning frog splash for two and Rollins can’t believe the kickout.

Cesaro is back up with the Neutralizer for two but a second is countered into the Pedigree for the same. Rollins hits a running kick to the back of the neck but Cesaro counters the Stomp into an uppercut. The no hands torture rack spin sets up the Swing for twenty three swings (or however these people count). The Neutralizer finishes Rollins at 11:23.

Rating: C+. Good stuff here but above all else, the right result, which you never know about with some of these matches. Rollins absolutely did not need to win here while it is a huge moment for Cesaro. I’m not sure I believe that this is the start of a big push for him, but at least he won here and got the big moment for a change.

Cesaro is VERY happy with the win.

We recap Smackdown.

Bobby Roode and Robert Roode are very proud with their win on Smackdown.

Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. AJ Styles/Omos

New Day is defending and has Big E. with them, at least for their entrance. Omos is about to start but New Day talks AJ into starting instead. Kofi gets a quick rollup for one and it’s time to hit that trombone solo. Woods comes in for a chinlock and explains that AJ is not a tag team wrestler because they are effectively cutting the ring in half. The Unicorn Stampede (not Stomp Cole) has Woods in trouble, followed by a headlock takeover from Woods.

A double bulldog gets two on Styles and Woods sends him outside for a dropkick through the ropes. AJ tries to dive over for the tag but gets planted face first by Kofi for two instead. Woods goes up and AJ uses the delay to get over to Omos for the tag to a heck of a response. Kofi: “YOU GOT THIS WOODS!”

A dropkick has no effect on Omos and a crossbody bounces off of him. Kofi gets caught coming off the top and thrown down as New Day realizes they’re in big trouble. Some running elbows in the corner crush New Day and there’s a backbreaker to Woods, with Omos bending him over the knee. Kofi gets a backbreaker of his own and AJ hits a Phenomenal Forearm off of Omos’ shoulders to drop Woods. A release Sky High and the one foot on the chest finishes Kofi at 9:54.

Rating: C+. Yeah that worked. They didn’t try to do anything ridiculous here as Omos did all kinds of basic big man stuff, which mainly involved him standing still or moving minimally. The size and power are enough to make him look devastating and that’s all you need to do. It’s a classic formula and I liked it quite a bit. Good stuff here and it couldn’t have been put together much better.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman. Shane has called Strowman stupid time after time so Strowman wants to stand up for everyone who has been bullied over the years. McMahon also allowed Strowman to pick the stipulation for the match, with Strowman making it a cage match.

Jerry Lawler joins commentary.

Braun Strowman vs. Shane McMahon

Inside a cage but here are Elias and Jaxson Ryker to attack Strowman with a chair, including various shots to the leg. Shane gets the chair inside and unloads on Strowman even more but it is way too early to escape. Strowman catches Shane going up so Shane pulls off a piece of sheet metal to hammer him down again. That’s good for two so Strowman, with a mouse under his eye, gets up and crushes Shane against the cage.

The big forearm to the chest drops Shane again but the leg gives out on the running powerslam attempt. Shane sends him into the cage a few times and hits the floatover DDT. The Coast To Coast connects for a rather close two so here are Elias and Ryker on the cage. Strowman knocks them both down so he and Shane go up, with Shane finding a tool box to hit him in the head. Shane goes up and over but takes WAY too long, allowing Strowman to grab him.

With nothing else available, Strowman rips the cage wall apart and drags Shane back in (that’s a new one). They both wind up on top of the cage and Strowman tosses him back to the mat (Strowman: “WHO’S STUPID NOW???”). That’s enough for Strowman to climb down….but he climbs back inside instead and shouts about how this is for everyone who has ever been called stupid. The running powerslam finishes Shane at 11:26.

Rating: D. Well thank goodness the former World Champion and professional strong man beat up a 50+ year old executive who doesn’t wrestle more than 3-4 times a year. That’s how you step up to someone. This was the story that wasn’t going to be good no matter how they presented it because Shane has completely outlived his usefulness, especially in a role like this one. At least they kept it relatively short and Strowman won, so it could have been a lot worse.

Bayley interrupts the announcement of the Hall of Fame video package and throws us to the Hall of Fame video package.

Most of the Hall of Fame class is presented:

Titus O’Neil

JBL
NWO (Hogan/Hall/Nash/Waltman)

Bella Twins

Wrestlemania XXXVIII is in Dallas, with Steve Austin making the announcement.

Booker T. joins commentary.

And now, we have an army of bunnies, one of whom loses an ear. Cue Miz and John Morrison for a “live” performance of Hey Hey Hop Hop, which is an improvement over seeing the bunnies holding their heads on.

We recap Miz/John Morrison vs. Bad Bunny/Damian Priest. Bunny is a huge rap star and a die hard wrestling fan who showed up at the Royal Rumble to perform his song about Booker T. Miz and Morrison didn’t like him, so Bunny started hanging out with Priest. They tormented each other for weeks until a match between Bunny and Morrison was set up for Wrestlemania. Miz and Morrison then painted Bunny’s multi million dollar car, which drew in Morrison and Priest to make it a tag match.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Damian Priest/Bad Bunny

Bunny gets a huge entrance of his own, coming into the stadium on a semi truck. Miz and Priest start but Miz wants Bunny instead. That’s exactly what Miz gets and Bunny looks a bit nervous. Bunny drops him with a right hand so Morrison has to remind Miz that bunnies are lucky. Another right hand sends Miz into the ropes again so he takes Bunny into the corner for a change.

A kick to the ribs puts Bunny down but he’s right back with with La Majistral for two. Morrison freaks out, saying Miz needs to start thinking like one of the best of all time. Back up and Bunny slides through Miz’s legs and snaps off a fairly long headscissors. There’s a headbutt to Morrison but he catches Bunny with an elbow. Miz comes back in with a chinlock but Bunny is back up with more right hands. A sunset flip gets two so Miz kicks him in the face to cut off another comeback.

Miz knocks him into the corner again as the fans try to get behind Bunny again. Bunny manages to get a boot up in the corner though and a tornado DDT plants Miz. The diving tag brings in Priest to clean house in a hurry, including tossing Miz at Morrison. The South of Heaven chokeslam gets two on Miz and Bunny comes back in for stereo Broken Arrows for a double near fall.

Bunny goes up top and hits a big dive to take out Miz/Morrison (Saxton: “I knew bunnies could hop but I didn’t know they could fly!”). Miz is right back in for the Skull Crushing Finale for two on Priest with Bunny making the save. Bunny hits a Canadian Destroyer on Morrison on the floor and a high crossbody finishes Miz at 15:01.

Rating: C. Yeah Bunny got in a lot of stuff here, but are you going to tell the biggest star willing to do something with WWE that he can’t do something? Bunny probably got in more offense than any other celebrity in recent memory and he looked fine enough doing it. Miz and Morrison have been treated as clueless putzes for years now so it isn’t that much of a stretch to see them lose here. Priest got in some points by association here so this went about as well as it could have, with Bunny being FAR better than I would have bet on.

Here’s the Sunday rundown.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair won the Royal Rumble and is ready to claim her destiny but Banks doesn’t want to give up the spot. Yeah it isn’t much of a story but that’s what you get when you have two pay per view matches going for the Women’s Tag Team Titles.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair

Banks is defending and they both look to be near tears to start. Feeling out process to start with Banks having to slip out of something close to a torture rack but getting caught in a double chickenwing. Banks manages to send her outside but the suicide dive is caught, allowing Belair to gorilla press her and walk up the steps for a toss over the top. Back in and Belair picks her up, does some squats, and slams her but Banks nails a running knee to take over.

The double arm crank goes on but Belair gets up and powers her into the corner. Banks is sent to the floor where she tries to pull Belair’s braid. That’s fine with Belair, who uses it to pull Banks into the post. Banks misses running double knees into the barricade and the both beat the count. Back in again and Belair muscles her up for a suplex, bounces her off the top, leans Banks forward, and then drops her back for two.

Belair shoulders her down again and then drives in some shoulders in the corner. The 450 hits knees though and Banks tries a hurricanrana, which is countered into back to back powerbombs. Banks sends her into the corner though and it’s a kick to Belair’s face, setting up a double springboard tornado DDT for two. With Belair down, Banks goes up and starts with the Meteora but changes into a splash halfway down.

Belair tries to get up so Banks uses the braid to pull her down into the Bank Statement for a rather clever setup. That’s broken up with a roll into the ropes so Banks hammers away in said ropes. Banks goes up so Belair tries a running hurricanrana, only to get tied in the Tree of Woe.

The top rope double stomp misses and so do the running knees, which go into the buckle. Now the 450 connects for two and Belair screams a lot on the kickout. The KOD is countered and Banks grabs the braid, which is used for a heck of a whip. Now the KOD can connect for the pin and the title at 17:20. Cole shouts about a kickout before switching to Belair winning.

Rating: B. I saw someone give the perfect description of this as brains vs. brawn, which is exactly what it was. Belair is an athletic freak and someone who can do almost everything you ask of her in the ring while Banks is the seasoned veteran who knows how to take on anyone. Banks couldn’t hang with Belair physically so she had to fight smart, but eventually you just can’t get around that kind of power and athleticism. Very good match and an awesome story to wrap things up.

There is a HUGE welt on Banks’ side from the hair whip. Belair celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. All things considered, including the rain, this was a pretty good show with only the cage match being bad. It wasn’t a classic, but after being away from everything for a year, I’ll certainly take what I can get. Above all else it felt like a Wrestlemania and that is what you need after such a long absence. The action was mostly good and they went with the right choices in the winners, so there wasn’t much to complain about here. Good show, and dang is it nice to have Wrestlemania, or at least the fans and the atmosphere, back.

Results

Bobby Lashley b. Drew McIntyre – Hurt Lock

Natalya/Tamina won Tag Team Turmoil last eliminating

Cesaro b. Seth Rollins – Neutralizer

AJ Styles/Omos b. New Day – Release Sky High to Kingston

Braun Strowman b. Shane McMahon – Running powerslam

Damian Priest/Bad Bunny b. Miz/John Morrison – High crossbody to Miz

Bianca Belair b. Sasha Banks – KOD

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two
Date: April 5, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re back for more of the same and that might not be the worst thing in the world. Last night’s part one wasn’t half bad but they are going to have a hard time surpassing that main event. There are eight more matches, plus the required Kickoff Show match, tonight so hopefully they can have another good one. Let’s get to it.

Here are last night’s results if you need a recap.

Kickoff Show: Liv Morgan vs. Natalya

Morgan rolls her up for two to start so Natalya does the same for a standoff. Some more rollups get some more near falls until Morgan sends her into the corner. A running hip attack hits Natalya but she’s right back with her basement dropkick for two more. Natalya clotheslines her to the floor, followed by the surfboard back inside. Natalya: “ASK HER!!!!” That’s broken up and Liv’s Codebreaker gets two. The sitout wheelbarrow faceplant gives Natalya the same and they pinfall reversal sequence with Liv getting the pin at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Imagine that: a Natalya match being technically fine but completely emotionless. That’s been the definition of her career for years now and I don’t see it changing anytime soon. Liv getting a win is fine but there is no way that she is getting anywhere near the top of the division, leaving this as little more than a way to fill time.

Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to the show in a new message.

Same opening video as last night.

Rob Gronkowski welcomes us to the show and throws us to the first match.

NXT Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is defending. The feel each other out to start with Charlotte going straight to the leg. That doesn’t work so Rhea gets in her face, earning some chops into the corner. Ripley is right back with Riptide for two and it’s time for a quick breather. They fight to the floor with Charlotte hitting a double chop but Rhea sends her into the steps. Back in and Rhea hits a dropkick before kicking away at the ribs.

A bodyscissors keeps Charlotte down but Rhea misses a running big boot and hurts her leg on the rope. Charlotte works on the leg, shrugs off a shot to the head, and bends the leg around on the mat. Rhea won’t quit so Charlotte works on the leg again. Back up and Rhea nails a basement dropkick, followed by some shouting at her own knee. The leg is fine enough for an electric chair faceplant for two, followed by a missile dropkick for the same, albeit after a delay because of the knee.

Charlotte chop blocks the knee though and Rhea is down again. The Figure Four doesn’t work again and Rhea reverses into the standing Cloverleaf. That’s broken up as well and Charlott knocks her down with another hard shot. The Figure Four is broken up again so Charlotte goes with a Boston crab instead.

Ripley gets out again and hits a quick big boot (thanks to some editing) for the double knockdown. Rhea takes her up top but gets slammed back down, though she’s able to raise her boots to block the moonsault. A horrible looking spear gives Charlotte two but the Figure Four finally goes on. The Figure Eight makes Ripley tap at 20:26.

Rating: C+. CHARLOTTE! WINS!! AGAIN!!! I have no idea why they needed to have her beat Rhea clean in their first match but I’m sure it has something to do with some kind of tribute to Ric Flair, who hasn’t had one in a while. I’m sick of seeing Charlotte with a title and it almost scares me to imagine how many titles she’s going to wind up with in the end.

We recap last night.

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley

Lana is here with Lashley. Black gets tossed around to start and Lashley hammers away, only to get low bridged to the floor. A running big boot puts Lashley on the floor but Black misses the moonsault. Lashley snaps off the overhead belly to belly but can’t get a suplex back inside. Instead Black kicks him in the chest, only to walk into a snap powerslam for two. Another suplex gets another two and Lashley loads up the Dominator, but Lana tells him to do the spear. That earns him Black Mass for the sudden pin at 7:14.

Rating: D+. This was a way to get Black on the show, and by that I mean a way for him to get beaten up until Lana and Lana alone cost Lashley the match. I’m glad Black won but if you want him to look good, just have him kick Lashley’s head off and win. It’s not like Lashley has anything going on at the moment, but now I’m sure we can get the big fallout with Lana now, because we need another part to that story.

Bayley complains about the elimination match and knows Sasha Banks won’t turn on her. With Bayley gone, Sasha is asked how much she wants to win the title. You’ll have to watch and see.

Money in the Bank ad.

Gronk would like to win the 24/7 Title.

We recap Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler. Otis was going to go on a Valentine’s Day date with Mandy Rose but Ziggler crashed it when Otis was late. Mandy wanted nothing else to do with Otis after that but it turns out that Sonya Deville stole Mandy’s phone and told Otis she would be late (and deleted the texts) so it would fall apart.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Otis

Sonya Deville is here with Ziggler. Otis misses a charge to start and gets superkicked outside in a hurry. That gets one back inside so Ziggler grabs a neckbreaker into the jumping elbow for two. The chinlock goes on but Otis is back up with a catapult. A hard whip sends Ziggler into the corner and a pop up World’s Strongest Slam plants him again. Sonya gets on the apron for a distraction though and Ziggler gets in a low blow. Cue Mandy to take out Sonya and hit Ziggler low, setting up the Caterpillar for the pin at 8:23.

Rating: D+. I was wrong on this one as I didn’t think they would let Otis pin Dolph. I’m rather please by the result and even though it wasn’t much of a match, at least they pulled the trigger on something. You can pencil in the mixed tag coming up and that’s all well and good, though I’m not sure where they can go after that.

Post match Otis picks Mandy up and they get the first kiss.

We recap Edge vs. Randy Orton. Edge came back at the Royal Rumble but Orton attacked him the next night and put him back on the shelf. Orton said Edge was an adrenaline junkie and he attacked him so Edge wouldn’t ruin his life like Orton did. To make it worse, Orton RKOed Edge’s wife (who is a Hall of Famer who wrestled earlier this year so we needed to act like he shot her). Now it’s a Last Man Standing match as this is very personal.

Edge vs. Randy Orton

Last Man Standing. Edge comes out first and glares at the stage for Orton….who is disguised as a cameraman and runs in for an RKO before the bell. The bell rings and it’s another RKO but Edge falls to the floor at nine. They fight back backstage with Orton knocking Edge through some doors. It goes onto the gym with Orton knocking him down again, setting up some choking with a rope on a machine.

Edge gets out and hits a dropkick through some machines before choking away at Orton. Some forearms put Orton in a chair and Edge pulls himself up on a bar for a seated senton of all things. Back up and they slug it out into another room with a red light. Both guys are sent face first into a garage door and it’s back into the arena. Orton shoves him off a platform and into the barricade before they stumble backstage again.

Edge’s head gets bounced off of another wall for a six count and it’s time to go into the office area. This time it’s Orton being sent into a wall but Edge kicks him in the ribs at nine. Orton gets thrown onto the big table so Edge pulls himself up onto part of the ceiling to drop an elbow. The cameraman gets knocked down but another one catches them up in the big storage facility in the back.

Both of them bounce off of various things until Orton knocks him onto a storage crate. Edge gets sent into some steps and Orton starts looking around. That’s good for another nine so they wind up in what looks like the promo area. Edge throws something at Orton’s leg to take him down and some more shots to the face do it again. Orton is placed on a table and drops a huge elbow.

They go to a truck with a cover on the bed and Orton hits the hanging DDT for nine. Edge climbs onto some crates and then on top of an NXT semi truck. Orton and the referee follow them up and it’s a spear to drop Orton. That’s good for nine but another spear is countered into an RKO.

Edge is up at nine as well but Orton has dropped down to the floor next to the biggest ladder I’ve ever seen in WWE (it’s on the floor and is WAY higher than the top of the semi truck). Instead Orton takes some chairs up to the top of the truck to load up the Conchairto. Edge grabs a head and arm choke though and Orton is out. Hold on though as Edge waves off the count so he can hit the Conchairto. Orton is finally done at 36:39.

Rating: B. This one is going to be divisive and I can understand that. If my math is right, this was the longest non-Iron Man match in Wrestlemania history, though it didn’t feel that long. It felt like two guys who wanted to hurt each other and were doing whatever they could to accomplish that. I liked the unique atmosphere and some of the spot, with the Conchairto making for a good finish.

After a quick breather, here’s Mojo Rawley with the Mob chasing him. Gronk shows up and dives off a platform to take out the pile, allowing him to pin Rawley for the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Street Profits vs. Austin Theory/Angel Garza

The Profits are defending. Dawkins shoulders Theory down to start and the champs start working on the arm. That’s fine with Theory, who sends Dawkins to the floor, allowing Theory to mock the dancing. Garza gets in a superkick on the floor, TAKES OFF HIS PANTS, and misses a clothesline so Dawkins can tag Ford in.

A DDT gets two on Ford and Garza hits the moonsault onto both champs on the floor. The Lionsault gets two more on Ford back inside but Ford pops up with an enziguri. Dawkins comes in and runs Garza over, only to get caught in Theory’s TKO. Ford frog splashes his way in for the save though and Dawkins gets the cover to retain at 6:23.

Rating: D+. If ever there was a match to cut for the sake of time. This was a weird one as there was no reason to believe the title change was taking place and then the finish felt like something the heels would do to win. There are no teams to challenge the Profits at the moment and I don’t see Theory and Garza changing that anytime soon.

Post match Garza and Theory stay on Ford but Bianca Belair runs in for the save. That means a KOD on Zelina.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Lacey Evans vs. Tamina vs. Naomi vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending and this is under elimination rules. Tamina shrugs off the gang attack to start so Lacey chop blocks her down. The other four slug it out with Bayley and Sasha double teaming Lacey. Naomi makes a quick save as a mini tag match breaks out. Tamina comes back in to run everyone over and we actually get a Team Bad reunion. That lasts for all of three seconds as everyone goes after Tamina, including something off the top each. A dog pile pin gets rid of Tamina at 6:23.

Naomi dives onto Sasha but Lacey misses a dive onto Bayley, earning a ram into the steps. A sunset flip gives Naomi two on Bayley and Sasha at the same time, followed by a sliding slip to both. The Rear View hits Sasha and a Bubba Bomb into the reverse Rings of Saturn….is broken up by Bayley. The Bank Statement gets rid of Naomi (Bayley: “DANCE TO THE BACK!”) at 10:36 and we’re down to three.

Bayley shouts about Lacey’s daughter though, allowing Lacey to avoid the running knee. Sasha is knocked silly instead so Lacey small packages Bayley for two. Back in and Sasha yells at Bayley, who shoves Sasha out of the way of the Woman’s Right. Lacey hits the second attempt though and Banks is done at 13:23.

After a replay where you can hear Cole shouting commentary, Bayley mocks Lacey with a salute and shoves her face against the rope. Lacey gets posted for two so Bayley ties her arm to the corner with the tag rope. Since that’s kind of a stupid plan, Lacey kicks her way out and hits the slingshot Bronco Busters in the corner. After a slow motion salute, Lacey’s double jump moonsault gets two. Cue Sasha with a Backstabber to Lacey though and Bayley’s weird bulldog driver retains at 19:15.

Rating: D. Well that was long and served little purpose. Bayley has held the title since last May (save for a four day Charlotte reign) and I’m not sure what else there is for her to do. Unless they do Bayley vs. Becky (unlikely), what is the point in keeping it on her much longer? I’m sure we’ll get to Bayley vs. Banks again eventually, but dang that sounds as appealing as watching this match all over again.

Titus O’Neil takes Gronk’s place as host.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is in Los Angeles.

We recap The Fiend vs. John Cena in the Firefly Fun House. After Cena said that he didn’t want to wrestle at this year’s show, Fiend popped up to challenge him. Cena accepted, and then Bray Wyatt went on to say that he blamed Cena for the rise of the Fiend. See, Cena beat him at Wrestlemania XXX and messed with Bray’s mind, leading to the creation of the Fiend. Therefore, tonight Cena goes to the Fun House.

John Cena vs. The Fiend

Cena makes his entrance but the Firefly Fun House pops up, with Bray saying that Cena is about to face himself. Then Cena is teleported to the Fun House (apparently the same way Seth Rollins got there back in October), where Ramblin Rabbit sends him through a door after the Fiend. Cena follows and finds the Vince puppet, asking if Cena has the ruthless aggression to make it in this company.

We see Wyatt copying the Kurt Angle promo to challenge Cena from 2002 and here’s 2020 Cena in 2002 Cena attire. Cena keeps saying RUTHLESS AGGRESSION but misses a bunch of shots. Bray: “You can look but you can’t touch!” And now it’s the Saturday Night’s Main Event opening, with Bray standing behind a cage and imitating Hulk Hogan. Cena (Johnny Largemeat) comes up and starts rapidly lifting weights, apparently destroying his arms in the process.

Vince and the Mercy the Buzzard are on commentary as Bray asks what happens when Cena realizes that Ego Mania has been running wild on him. Bray sends him off camera to the Smackdown Fist where Cena is the Dr. of Thugnomics, with Bray dancing to Basic Thuganomics. They’re back in the ring and Cena finds out that he can only speak in rhymes, including a Husky Harris reference.

Bray calls Cena a bully and a horrible person who takes the weaknesses of others and turns them into jokes. With that, Bray gives him the floor so Cena throws him Deez Nuts. Cena, in the Babe Ruth jersey from last year, misses a charge and gets knocked out by a chain. Now it’s Bray back in the Wyatt Family gear and sitting in the rocking chair as we see clips of Wrestlemania XXX.

The fans wanted and needed him that night and now it’s time to rewrite his own story. They’re back in the ring now with Bray dancing with the unconscious Cena and loading up Sister Abigail. He lets Cena go though and drops down, handing Cena a chair in a recreation of Wrestlemania XXX. Bray tells Cena to fix his mistake from last year but Bray disappears away from Cena’s swing.

And now it’s…..NWO MONDAY NITRO??? Bray is Eric Bischoff (with the jacket and a Wolfpac shirt) and introduces Cena as Hollywood Hogan. Cena takes Bray down and unloads as we see clips of Cena’s past. He wakes up as himself and sees that he’s beating up Huskus the Pig. The Fiend appears behind him and gives him the Mandible Claw to knock Cena out. We hear Cena’s promo about ending the most overrated overhyped superstar ever and the Claw goes back on with Bray counting the pin. Cena teleports away and the Fiend stands alone.

No rating as this wasn’t a match but I got into this. It’s a rather interesting character study of Cena and you can get what they’re going with in Fiend making him face his fears. Back in the day, CM Punk said that Cena had become the New York Yankees: the big bad who held people down and used money to get what he wants (or going from the Real American Hogan to Hollywood Hogan as they used here).

That’s what Fiend is showing Cena here and it scared Cena that he had changed so much and become what he fought against for so many years. Now granted, if you haven’t been glued to WWE for the last….oh eight years or so, this made no sense, but the effort and thought was ALL there and I got most of what they were going for, plus some of the complete insanity that went along with it. Not a match, but kind of a fascinating weird look into the WWE psyche.

We cut to Titus O’Neil. Titus: “I don’t know what I just saw.”

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Drew McIntyre. Lesnar is World Champion but Drew eliminated him from the Royal Rumble and then won the whole thing, earning him this spot. Drew has kicked his head off a few times since then to show he can hang with Brock.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and gets Claymored for two after about ten seconds. Another Claymore misses and it’s time to go to Suplex City. The F5 gets one and Brock isn’t happy. Another F5 gets two and there’s the third for another two. Another F5 is countered and McIntyre hits two more Claymores. A fourth gives Drew the pin and the title at 4:28.

Rating: D. I’m happy that McIntyre won but GOOD GRIEF STOP DOING THAT SAME MATCH OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER! It’s a cool idea one time and then don’t do it again for years. This is all Lesnar does anymore and now it’s creeping over into other main events too. It loses its impact when they keep doing it again and again and now you’ve grown to expect it every time. Anyway, great moment to end the show and McIntyre as champion is awesome, assuming they don’t have Lesnar win it back in two months again.

Overall Rating: C-. I didn’t like this one as much as last night’s but it still wasn’t terrible. This one definitely felt like the bigger show and had the more intriguing matches (for the most part). I’m not wild on some of the booking decisions but it felt more like a Wrestlemania and that’s what matters. The crowd being gone didn’t bother me as much either, but the wrestling itself just wasn’t as good. Overall, not bad but last night’s felt tighter and more enjoyable.

Overall Overall Rating: C. With something like this, it’s almost impossible to give the thing a fair rating. When you factor in the day in between and the weird atmosphere, the show was pretty much just ok. There were some very good matches but some that made me wonder why I was wasting my time. Overall it’s an enjoyable one off, but I’m still not behind the idea of a two night Wrestlemania going forward. Until WWE can cut these things WAY down and trim off so much of the unnecessary stuff, it needs to be one night and one night only, just for the sake of sanity if nothing else.

Results

Charlotte b. Rhea Ripley – Figure Eight

Aleister Black b. Bobby Lashley – Black Mass

Otis b. Dolph Ziggler – Caterpillar

Edge b. Randy Orton when Orton couldn’t answer the ten count

Street Profits b. Angel Garza/Austin Theory – Frog splash to Theory

Bayley b. Sasha Banks, Naomi, Tamina and Lacey Evans – Bulldog driver to Evans

Drew McIntyre b. Brock Lesnar – Claymore

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Wrestlemania XXXVI Night One
Date: April 4, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
Host: Rob Gronkowski

Sweet goodness that does not feel right. I’m not sure what to expect tonight because WWE didn’t feel the need to tell us what was going to be taking place on either night. This show is going to have about a hundred asterisks in the history books and that’s perfectly fine, but it doesn’t make things any less disappointing (not that it’s WWE’s fault). Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cesaro vs. Drew Gulak

Gulak takes him down by the arm to start but Cesaro powers up with a backbreaker to get out of trouble. That earns him a LeBell Lock (which Cole calls a Crossface, missing the point of the move almost entirely) to send Cesaro outside so Gulak dives on him for a bonus. Back in and Cesaro’s arm gets snapped across the top rope and a clothesline puts him on the floor again. Cesaro gets sent into the steps but he’s able to uppercut Gulak out of the air back inside for two. The Neutralizer can’t work but Cesaro uses the left arm uppercut and goes with a (no hands) spinning torture rack slam for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: C. Just a match here and it did well enough with the warmup stuff, though my goodness it’s going to be a rough couple of nights. The lack of crowd reaction is going to hurt things a lot but that was always going to be the case. They were a little more energized than usual, but Cole on his own and nothing else as far as noise is going to make for some tough going.

Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to the show to explain that we are on a closed set with no audience. Tonight, they are going to be making people happy, because this is Wrestlemania. There’s your first WWE pat on the back of the night.

Instead of an original version of America the Beautiful, we get a montage of versions of the song played at previous Wrestlemanias. That’s a good one at least.

The opening video goes into the full pirate theme but the narrator says hang on a second because this is too cliched. Instead, he walks us through everything included, such as shots of heroes and catchphrases. It turns into a regular trailer, complete with the same narrator telling us to forget everything we know coming into tonight. Fate leads the way and fate has a funny way of surprising us. We go into For Those About To Rock for a better intro. I love pirate movies so this worked well for me.

Rob Gronkowski welcomes us to the show and says he’s the right man for the job because he knows how to start a thirty hour party. Mojo Rawley comes in to take some chops and it’s time to go to the ring.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Kabuki Warriors vs. Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross

The Warriors are defending for the first time since mid December. Asuka laughs at Bliss to start and it’s off to Sane before anything happens. Kairi knocks Bliss down and messes with her bow so it’s a slap to the face, allowing Bliss to mess with Kairi’s hair for a change. It’s off to Cross for a running basement dropkick but Sane powers her into the corner. Asuka comes in and gets forearmed in the chest as everything breaks down.

Nikki dives off the apron to take out Sane, meaning it’s time for a hug back inside. Back in and Nikki sends Sane to the floor, only to have her dropkick through the ropes cut off. Cross gets taken into the corner but manages a sunset flip for two, setting up the tag to Bliss. That’s fine for Sane, who hits an Alberto top rope double stomp for her own two. Asuka works on an armbar but her bulldog is broken up.

Not that it matters as a kick to the face drops Bliss for two more. Bliss gets up and avoids a charge, allowing the hot tag to Cross to pick up the pace. Sane rakes her eyes but Asuka walks into the Purge. The Insane Elbow breaks up the cover though and they’re both down again. Cross goes for a rollup but gets pulled into the Asuka Lock.

That’s broken up with Twisted Bliss but Sane Intercepts Bliss to put everyone down. Cross catches Sane on top but gets caught in a powerbomb/top rope forearm combination for a rather near fall. Back up and Cross hits the Purge to drop Sane, setting up Twisted Bliss for the pin and the titles at 15:03.

Rating: C. This could have been worse but it went on a good bit too long. The title change was supposed to be a feel good moment but when the titles have never meant anything beyond their first few weeks, the impact isn’t really there. Cross was pushed as the star of the match and it was fine enough, though I have no faith in the futures of the titles.

The Artist Collective have a plan for Daniel Bryan.

Elias vs. King Corbin

Hold on though as Corbin shows us a clip of his attempted murder of Elias last week so Corbin demands a forfeit. Cue Elias to break the guitar over Corbin’s back and a good posting so we can get started. Elias elbows him down for one and a swinging neckbreaker gets the same. Corbin gets in a toss to the floor though and Elias is sent shoulder first into the post. Some elbows to the shoulder keep Elias down as Cole tries to make this story sound intense.

Corbin shouts at commentary a lot and then sends Elias shoulder first into the post again. Elias manages to reverse a whip to send Corbin’s shoulder into the post though and it’s time for a breather. Some clubberin in the corner puts Corbin down but he grabs Deep Six for two. Elias knees him in the face for two more but Corbin rolls away before the top rope elbow launches. An uppercut lets Corbin put his feet on the ropes for two so Elias grabs a rollup with tights for the pin at 8:53.

Rating: D. Raw style match here and that’s not the best thing in the world. It was fine for a revenge match as Elias was aggressive but pinning Corbin is more damaging to him than pin. That being said, Elias being launched off a ten foot high balcony is just an eight day injury now? Come on already.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler. Lynch has been Raw Women’s Champion for a year now and has beaten everyone there is to beat but Baszler won a triple threat match, also including Bayley, at Survivor Series. Baszler was unstoppable in NXT and bit Becky’s neck to draw a lot of blood. Then she ran through the Elimination Chamber to earn the title shot in the most obvious result in years. Becky has been trying to play mind games but Baszler is such a killer that she doesn’t seem too bothered.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler

Becky is defending and drives her semi truck to the arena for her big entrance. Baszler wastes no time in going for the Kirifuda Clutch but Becky is outside in a hurry. Baszler follows but Becky sends her into the steps a few times and Baszler is banged up early. Back in and Becky hits her missile dropkick, setting up a beating in the corner. It’s too early for the Disarm-Her though and Becky has to get out of the Kirifuda Clutch.

A spinebuster into a double underhook spinning faceplant gets two and Becky is sent to the apron. They slug it out until a Rock Bottom onto the apron plants Baszler. A powerbomb into the cross armbreaker has Becky in trouble until she stacks Baszler up for two. That’s reversed into the Disarm-Her on Becky, followed by a knee to the face for another near fall.

Becky goes to the apron and gets in a Stunner over the ropes, setting up a quickly broken Disarm-Her over the ropes. Baszler reverses that into an even more quickly broken Kirifuda Clutch to send Becky outside. This time Baszler follows her out and swings Becky head first into the announcers’ table like she did on Raw. Back in and the standing version of the Clutch goes on but Becky flips backwards into a cradle to retain at 8:42.

Rating: B-. Uh….ok then. I have no idea why they need to keep the title on Becky at the moment as she has literally held the title for a year and is getting close to the modern record. I’m not sure what the point is in keeping it on her here as the only thing left is a submission match with Baszler or a one on one match with Rousey, which doesn’t seem likely. Good match, but pretty confusing result.

Undertaker is getting a limited series on the WWE Network. Makes sense given the upcoming 30 year mark.

Intercontinental Title: Sami Zayn vs. Daniel Bryan

Zayn is defending with Cesaro, Shinsuke Nakamura and Drew Gulak all at ringside. Sami hits the very long pause button to start and Bryan finally gives chase, allowing Cesaro to cut Bryan off. They do the same thing again but this time it’s Nakamura playing Cesaro’s role. Gulak and Cesaro get into a fight on the floor until Gulak sends Nakamura over the barricade. Gulak nearly gets in a fight with Sami for the DQ but Bryan finally chases Sami down on the ramp.

Bryan starts in on the leg as Sami loudly begs off, only to be sent outside. That means a heck of a suicide dive, followed by a running dropkick in the corner for a bonus. Some knees to the face have Sami rocked but he scores with some forearms to slow Bryan down. Bryan fights back up but Cesaro and Nakamura jump Gulak. That earns them a double suicide dive, allowing Sami to kick Bryan out of the air for the surprise pin at 9:20.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with another surprising finish. Sami is a rather good choice for the cocky champion who keeps surviving and after everything he’s done over the years, I like the idea of letting him have the title for a bit. Throw in the issue of Bryan possibly self quarantining and there was little reason to switch the title here. Well other than the idea of Bryan facing a challenger of the week in one great match after another.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Jimmy Uso vs. Kofi Kingston vs. John Morrison

Morrison is defending for his team in a ladder match. Some monkey flips don’t work to start so everyone goes to the floor to grab a ladder each. Jimmy gets knocked down first and comes up holding his leg. Morrison stomps both of them down on the mat but has to fight off the SOS onto the ladder. Trouble in Paradise misses as well and it’s Kofi vs. Jimmy slugging it out on top.

A running dive over the top takes down Morrison and the ladder and they’re all down on the floor. Back in and Morrison hits the super Spanish Fly on Kofi, followed by the Superfly Splash from Jimmy. Kofi headbutts Morrison off the top of the ladder before diving off the top with the double stomp to Morrison’s chest. Jimmy slides in another ladder and wedges it inside the standing ladder.

A HARD whip sends Kofi face first into the bridged ladder and Morrison gets superkicked out of the air. Jimmy goes up but Morrison shoves the ladder over, sending Jimmy down for the big crash (it was such a drop that he changed directions after landing). Kofi catches Morrison on top for the slugout but here’s Jimmy with another ladder to put all three up at once. They all pull the title hook down at once and it’s a triple headbutt to knock Morrison down with the titles to retain at 18:36.

Rating: B. This felt like a good ladder match that would have made it into a great one had it been in front of a crowd. What we got was good enough though and the dives and landings were rather awesome. I liked this more than almost anything else but my goodness it’s hard to watch them land like this with no one being there to watch. Good match, but sad in its way.

We recap Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins. Seth has turned into the Monday Night Messiah but Owens doesn’t think much of him. They both had teams built up but the AOP is sidelined due to Rezar’s injury and Samoa Joe is suspended. Therefore, it’s one on one with the idea that Owens has never had a Wrestlemania moment. That’s not quite how history works, but it’s what we’re getting.

Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens

Rollins is in white but the glove has been some king of Tiger King referenced. Owens slugs away to start and hits a backsplash to put Rollins on the floor in a hurry. A backdrop onto the apron has Owens in trouble and a Falcon Arrow onto the apron makes it even worse. The suicide dive is broken up with a right hand but Rollins is fine enough to hit the Sling Blade.

Owens hits a DDT to get a breather and the Swanton connects for two. The Pop Up Powerbomb misses and so does the Stunner, allowing Rollins to hit an enziguri. Owens blasts him with a clothesline though and it’s a double knockdown. Rollins is up first and hits some superkicks to set up the Stomp, only to get reversed into the Pop Up sitout Powerbomb for two. They head outside with Rollins hitting him with the bell….and that’s a DQ at 10:09.

Hold on though as Owens says Rollins isn’t much of a god if that’s the best he can do. Owens wants to continue it No DQ so Rollins is back in to knee him in the head as the bell rings. Rollins throws him to the floor and the steps bounce off of Owens’ head, followed by a chair to the back. Owens bells him in the head a few times (it rings even if you hit someone with the board underneath it) and then climbs the sign for a huge backsplash to send Rollins through the announcers’ table. They stagger back inside for the Stunner to finish Rollins at 17:26 (counting the break in the middle).

Rating: C. I wasn’t big on this match in the first place and the whole Owens has never had a Wrestlemania Moment deal is still stupid but at least they didn’t stick with the DQ. This feud has lost almost all of the steam that it had in the first place so hopefully it’s done here. Granted when you don’t have much of a TV show to lord over, you’re not going to be the best messiah in the world.

Mojo and Gronk talk about how great the show is when R-Truth comes up to complain about how hard everything is. Gronk knocks him down and Mojo gets the title back. Notice the completely fine announcers’ table in the background.

Paul Heyman scares Charly Caruso but says Drew McIntyre is the one who should be afraid. In 24 hours, McIntyre is being exposed as a fraud and he can crawl out of the ring, victimized and conquered.

We preview tomorrow’s matches.

Smackdown World Title: Braun Strowman vs. Goldberg

Goldberg is defending. Strowman can’t get the powerslam and it’s a pair of spears to drop him in the first minute. Make it three straight for two and then a fourth cuts Strowman down again. Strowman counters the Jackhammer into the powerslam and then another one and then a third and then a big running fourth for the pin and the title at 2:13. You could have gone either way but it’s better to have someone actually active instead of Goldberg. Strowman as champion is about two years overdue, but I can’t imagine this lasts very long.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is in Los Angels.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Undertaker, which is all about AJ not being impressed by the modern Undertaker. He has called out Undertaker’s real life family and Undertaker has been acting more like BikerTaker than the Deadman as they head into a Boneyard match.

Undertaker vs. AJ Styles

They are in a graveyard for this one and there goes the gong as a hearse pulls up to the gate. The casket is pulled out by some druids and it’s AJ inside for a good surprise. Undertaker rides in on the motorcycle to Metallica and AJ talks about Michelle McCool digging the grave. Undertaker goes after him so AJ grabs a rock, only to get sent into an open casket. Undertaker punches through a window and cuts his arm open but throws AJ on top of the hearse anyway.

Some right hands knock him off the hearse and Undertaker has a seat while asking if AJ wants more. After Undertaker quotes Clubber Lang (“You want some more? I got a lot more.”), AJ throws some leaves in his face and gets in a low blow. Undertaker stands up after some right hands and knocks AJ down again, this time into a grave. Cue the OC as this has turned into a western.

A bunch of light comes out of a building and the walls come down to reveal a bunch of masked men. They surround Undertaker and do the eternally brilliant thing of attacking him one at a time. With that taken care of, Anderson and Gallows jump Undertaker but he isn’t about to be hit with a shovel. Instead Undertaker takes it back and beats them down, allowing AJ to break a tombstone over his back.

AJ hammers away and calls him an old man but breaks his fingers on Undertaker’s head. They fight through a wall and both lay on the ground sound like they’re dead. AJ says Undertaker is nothing but Undertaker flips him off and says come on. A shovel over the back puts Undertaker down in a grave and AJ goes to the machine with a barrel of dirt. Then a light shows up behind him and Undertaker pops up to beat on him some more. AJ climbs up a well placed ladder to get on the roof of the barn, so Undertaker makes flames come up to keep him in place.

Anderson and Gallows are up there too, with Gallows being thrown off. Anderson gets Tombstoned onto the metal roof and Undertaker chokeslams AJ off the roof. Undertaker climbs down and asks AJ what his wife’s name is now. They’re just getting started as Undertaker carries him over to the grave. AJ apologizes so Undertaker picks him up and says AJ put up a great fight. Undertaker hugs him and says most people wouldn’t have given him that kind of a fight. Undertaker turns to leave….and then knocks AJ into the grave. Undertaker gets in the machine and pours the dirt on AJ for the win at about 18:30.

Rating: A+. I don’t know what else you could have wanted from this match. This went so far beyond anything resembling sane or rational and went into complete insanity territory, making it one of the most entertaining things I can remember WWE doing in a LONG time. Of course it’s not good but that’s the point. This was entertaining, and that’s a lot more than you are going to get out of most Undertaker matches these days. Watch this and be prepared to laugh quite a bit, because it’s like Final Deletion but with production value.

AJ’s hand sticks out of the dirt as Undertaker gets on his bike. He throws up the fist so more fire comes up on the building and the Undertaker symbol lights up to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I’m really not sure how to grade this one but I liked some parts of it well enough. The problem really is in the atmosphere, as the show feels so weak that there isn’t much that can be praised. The people were working hard and I feel so bad for them to not get their big Wrestlemania stadium experience. What we got was fun at points, but the lack of crowd energy or big show feeling made it more of a chore to watch at times. It definitely has its moments though, and I didn’t hate it by any means. Check out the main event for sure though, probably with some friends to watch with you, and have a good time.

Results

Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross b. Kabuki Warriors – Twisted Bliss to Sane

Elias b. King Corbin – Rollup with tights

Becky Lynch b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Sami Zayn b. Daniel Bryan – Helluva Kick

John Morrison b. Kofi Kingston and Jimmy Uso – Morrison pulled down the titles

Kevin Owens b. Seth Rollins – Stunner

Braun Strowman b. Goldberg – Running powerslam

Undertaker b. AJ Styles – Undertaker buried Styles

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown
Date: November 10, 2006
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re done with Cyber Sunday and that means it is time to get on the road to Survivor Series. The big story coming out of the pay per view is King Booker not only keeping the World Heavyweight Title but also becoming the Champion of Champions. That means he needs a new challenger and odds are we find that out tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here is Cyber Sunday if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Booker retaining the title thanks to Kevin Federline.

Here are King Booker and Queen Sharmell for a chat. Booker talks about how he kept the title but alas, like Alexander the Great, he has no worlds left to conquer. He lists off some names he has beaten but here is Teddy Long to interrupt. Long brings a bunch of photographers for some photos of Booker because we need to celebrate his victory.

Booker agrees that he defeated everyone when his back was against the wall, but last week there was someone protecting him. That would be Batista, and Long owes him a big favor. As a result, Batista is getting a title shot at Survivor Series, but it might not be against Booker, because he is defending the title right now. Booker: “I’LL SUE YOU!”

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is challenging and drives Booker into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. The Fujiwara armbar goes on to keep Booker in trouble but he fights to his feet. That earns him a clothesline to the floor and we take a break. Back with Booker firing off knees in the corner as we hear about Lashley being on Team Cena at Survivor Series against Team Big Show.

Lashley comes back with the delayed vertical suplex (with JBL saying it reminded him of Rick Rude) but Booker avoids a charge to send Lashley’s shoulder into the post. Booker crotches him against the post for a bonus and a superkick gets two. The armbar stays on the bad arm but Lashley is up in a hurry, meaning Booker has to kick him in the face. Now it’s a shinbreaker to keep Lashley down again and we hit the spinning toehold of all things.

A small package gives Lashley two so Booker clotheslines him right back down. Back up and Booker’s leapfrog is powerslammed out of the air for a heck of a crash and a near fall. Sharmell offers a distraction though and Booker gets in a thumb to the eye. Lashley shrugs that off too but another Sharmell distraction lets Booker roll him up with trunks to retain.

Rating: C+. This was a bit rushed but they did their thing well enough. Booker cheating to win makes sense but it isn’t like Lashley was going to get the title so soon after Booker had his big win on Sunday anyway. I had fun with it and Booker did everything he could to make Lashley’s offense look great. That’s how you make someone look better in defeat and it is what happened here.

Post match Booker goes for the ax kick but Lashley clotheslines him down instead.

We get the first (of likely many) videos on the history of Batista vs. Finlay.

Here’s what John Cena has done to promote the Marine.

MVP comes in to Teddy Long’s office to complain about last week, but Long is about to watch the DVD of See No Evil (with DELETED SCENES). That isn’t cool with MVP, who mentions being from the streets. That’s cool with Teddy, who gives him a street fight with Kane next week.

Chris Benoit comes up to Chavo Guerrero and Vickie Guerrero and asks what happened to them. He asks if this is about Eddie’s estate but Vickie tells him to worry about something more important. Like Chavo taking the US Title at Survivor Series.

Jimmy Wang Yang/Matt Hardy vs. Sylvan/Gregory Helms

I feel like I’m watching a Lethal Lottery show. Helms chokes Yang as JBL rants about how much he can’t stand Yang at all. A backbreaker sets up a chinlock but Hardy comes in for the save, allowing Yang to be double teamed. Sylvan comes in for some knees to the chest and Helms whips Yang hard into the corner. A dropkick into a belly to back slam gets two on Yang, who spinwheel kicks Sylvan out of the air. The hot tag brings in Hardy to hammer on Helms and plant him with a Side Effect. Everything breaks down and Sylvan is sent outside, allowing Hardy to hit the Twist of Fate from the top to finish Helms.

Rating: C-. Perfectly fine enough match here, even with Hardy vs. Helms seemingly continuing for eternity. Hardy’s comeback worked well and he carried a lot more of the match than Yang, but it wasn’t like he could bring it up to another level. This felt like four people being put on the show for something to do instead of for a particular reason and that is rarely a good idea.

More on Batista vs. Finlay.

Here is Mr. Kennedy for Undertaker’s answer to a Survivor Series challenge. He talks about how Undertaker debuted sixteen years ago at Survivor Series and has made an amazing legacy for himself. That’s good, but look at what Kennedy has done in so little time. He has beaten all kinds of World Champions and is ready to move to Raw or ECW and show what else he can do, but Undertaker is standing in his way. Kennedy wants Undertaker out here right now because he is ending Undertaker’s career at Survivor Series. More taunting ensues and the gong goes off.

Undertaker does the full entrance and even takes his hat off, allowing Kennedy to hit him low. The beatdown is on with Kennedy hammering him in the head with the microphone. Undertaker is busted open and more microphone shots put him down. Kennedy gets in his face and says his own name before leaving, with Undertaker sitting up but not being able to get very far. This was a good segment for Kennedy, who set this up and then beat Undertaker down. He’ll get wrecked at Survivor Series, but it worked for him here.

Chris Benoit vs. KC James

Non-title and James has Michelle McCool with him. JBL sings McCool’s praises, saying he likes women, even if Cole doesn’t. Benoit hammers away in the corner and a knee to the ribs sends James outside. Back in and James elbows him down and grabs the chinlock with a knee in the back to keep Benoit in trouble. Benoit suplexes his way to freedom and it’s time to roll the German suplexes. The Swan Dive sets up the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: D+. No time to do much here but it was a nice way to show that Benoit is on a roll. It’s also smart to use low level tag guys like James here, because he isn’t going to be hurt by a loss to Benoit. They did things exactly as they should have here and no one was hurt, so what else can you ask them to do?

Batista is going to be on Smallville.

Boogeyman vs. TJ Dalton

Boogeyman throws him inside, catches a kick, eats some worms and finishes with the chokebomb in a hurry.

Post match, Dalton gets wormed.

Another Batista vs. Finlay video.

Kristal yells at Miz for not getting rid of Boogeyman. Worry not though as Miz will beat Boogeyman in a match next week.

One last Batista vs. Finlay video.

Batista vs. Finlay

Batista shoulders him down to start and then hits him again for a bonus. Finlay goes to the ropes so Batista pulls him back to hammer away some more. They head outside with Batista blocking a posting and hitting a clothesline. We take a break and come back with Batista holding a kneeling bearhug. More forearms in the corner have Finlay in trouble and a backdrop makes it worse.

There’s a backbreaker to keep Finlay down as this has been one sided so far. It’s back to the floor for a big boot to Finlay but the Leprechaun hits Batista in the leg with the Shillelagh. Finlay gets in a kick of his own and it’s time to work on Batista’s knee. The cranking and stomping on the knee ensues with Finlay putting on a standing leglock. Back up and Finlay misses a charge into the post and Batista hits some shoulders to the ribs.

Something like a Muscle Buster of all things drops Finlay but the knee is too banged up. Some clotheslines set up a powerslam to plant Finlay but he goes to the knee to slow Batista down again. That lasts for all of two seconds as Batista hits another clothesline for two. Cue Booker for a distraction but Batista sends Finlay into him, setting up the spinebuster for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was surprisingly one sided for a good chunk of the match as Batista dominated most of it. The knee thing didn’t mean much and Finlay never felt like a threat to win. I know Batista is on his way to the World Title shot at Survivor Series and it’s hardly bad to have him look dominant but you would expect something a little more competitive here.

Overall Rating: C. It’s nice to have Cyber Sunday out of the way so things can have a fresh focus, but there wasn’t anything important here. They mostly played it safe and didn’t try anything out of the ordinary, so we’ll call it a nice and easy first step towards the pay per view. Batista vs. Booker is the only way they could go and I’m sure the Survivor Series matches will get some nice build going forward. There’s nothing wrong with taking it nice and safe and that’s how they went here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Hardcore Justice 2021
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

It’s the Impact Wrestling Wrestlemania weekend offering with the hardcore themed show, as operated by Tommy Dreamer. Now for once this actually makes sense, though somehow Dreamer is likely to be main eventing the show as well. The card looks decent and has been built up on Impact as of late, so it feels like an actually pay per view. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features Eric Young talking about how he has a sickness and violence is the only cure. Tommy Dreamer has that same sickness and tonight, Young is willing to provide the cure for him.

Ace Austin/Madman Fulton vs. TJP/Fallah Bahh vs. Josh Alexander/Petey Williams

Austin, TJP and Alexander are feuding over the X-Division Title and got to pick their own partners. Alexander gets run over by the huge Bahh to start, including getting knocked to the floor. Back in and Bahh strikes away but Alexander takes him down by the leg. Williams comes in but gets knocked into the corner by TJP. A drop toehold lets Williams hit a dropkick to the back, only to get pulled into TJP’s Octopus variation. It’s off to Austin, who is taken down for a nasty arm crank from TJP.

Bahh comes back in and gets caught in the corner for some shoulders from Fulton. Some double teaming sets up a running crossbody to Bahh’s kneeling back for two but Bahh backdrops his way to freedom. Williams tags himself in to take over on Austin and it’s back to Alexander for a quick German suplex. A blind tag brings Fulton back in to side slam Alexander for two and a big boot lets Austin come back in.

Austin’s spinning legdrop gets two but Alexander pops back up with a powerslam. Austin kicks him into the corner for the hot tag to TJP and the pace picks up. There’s a tornado DDT to Austin and everything breaks down. Bahh crossbodies Fulton down and the Mamba Splash hits Austin but Alexander tags himself in to steal the near fall. Williams Sharpshooters Austin and Alexander ankle locks Fulton but TJP grabs a choke on Williams at the same time.

Bahh breaks the whole thing up and it’s Fulton having to save Austin from the Canadian Destroyer. Everything breaks down again and Fulton cleans house with everyone going down. TJP knocks Alexander into the corner for a facewash and the Canadian Destroyer hits TJP. Williams stomps on Bahh’s ankle and Alexander ankle locks him for the tap at 13:41.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what it should have been with a hot opener featuring some talented people. The Canadian Destroyer may have become one of the biggest jokes in wrestling but there is still a little something special about Williams using it. This was all about the main trio though and they could tear the house down at Rebellion. Good stuff here and they’re off to a solid start.

Here’s what’s coming today.

Hernandez vs. Shera

This is a chairs match dubbed Chairly Legal. Dang it why do I have to love puns? The exchange of shoulders goes to Shera and he hammers away in the corner. Hernandez gets in a shot of his own though and the first chair shot goes over Shera’s back. Some chairs are set up at ringside but Hernandez spends too much time on the building, allowing Shera to chair him down. Back in and Hernandez gets in a chair shot of his own and wedges some chairs in the corner.

Shera goes face first into a chair in the middle of the ring for two and the big ax handles keep him down. A quick spinebuster gives Shera two and they head outside with Hernandez taking over again. Some chairs are thrown in and Shera manages to superplex him onto the pile for two. Hernandez is right back up with chair shots of his own but here is Rohit Raju to blast Hernandez with a chair. A confused Shera gets the pin at 9:01.

Rating: C. Another not too bad match here with Shera getting a lot better, mainly due to not having everything focused on some stupid dance. The chairs were the focal point here and they didn’t go outside of that, which made enough sense for a one off match like this. Hernandez is fine in this role and that is all he needs to be. Not a great match but it fit in well on a show like this one.

We go to Swinger’s Palace where Chris Sabin and James Storm aren’t happy with being told to take the night off. XXXL comes in and can’t get a seat so a match is set up for…well actually one isn’t because XXXL gets to sit down. Matt Cardona comes in to ask what the deal is around here. He says Swinger has been in wrestling for 150 years so here is Dreamer to it’s MATCH TIME. This isn’t Wrestle House….but Dreamer is in charge so we’re having Cardona vs. Swinger in a Crate American Bash.

Doc Gallows vs. Black Taurus

Karl Anderson and Crazzy Steve are here too. Taurus hammers away to start but misses a crossbody, allowing Gallows to hit a clothesline to take over. Gallows knocks him down again and hammers away, including an uppercut to cut off a comeback attempt. A suplex sets up a chinlock for a bit before a trip to the floor.

Taurus is sent over the barricade and we head back inside for another chinlock. With that broken up, Gallows hits a bit boot but Taurus fights up with a shot to the ace. A top rope clothesline sets up a 619 into a missile dropkick for two on Gallows. Anderson offers a distraction though and it’s a superkick into a chokebomb to finish Taurus at 9:01.

Rating: D+. This was mostly a squash until Taurus had a nice comeback. I like Taurus a good bit but there is no way he should be beating Gallows here. That being said, there is only so much that can be done when Gallows isn’t exactly giving him much throughout the match. The Brothers are not exactly my favorite people in Impact and this didn’t do much to change that idea.

Violent By Design is ready to cure Tommy Dreamer and company.

Matt Cardona vs. Johnny Swinger

Crate American Bash, meaning there is a crate at every corner with something inside to use. Swinger, with the Swingerellas, gets rolled up to start and lies about the tights being pulled. Back up and Swinger hits a strut but needs to hide in the ropes, allowing Cardona to do his own strut, which will always work. Some forearms to the back set up a Paul Orndorff elbow on Cardona and it’s time to grab the first crate. Inside….is a framed photo of Scott Hall, which is a call back to the WCW version of this match because reasons.

Swinger knocks him off the apron and into the barricade for a breather. Back in and Swinger goes for the second crate but Cardona takes him down with a jawbreaker. Swinger pulls him off the ropes though and opens the second crate to find…a rat trap. Ok that was funny. Cardona gets his knees up in the corner and adds the middle rope dropkick.

Back up and a collision gives us another double knockdown but Cardona is up first. The third crate has….something Cardona likes but he doesn’t pull it out. Swinger gets the other crate and finds some brass knuckles for a big smile. That’s about it for the smiling though as he charges into Radio Silence for the pin at 7:53.

Rating: C-. Total comedy match here and there is nothing wrong with that. Swinger is someone who has gone from a complete groan to one of the more entertaining things about Impact Wrestling, which has been a great surprise. I’m guessing the third crate has some kind of toy or action figure inside, which would be appropriate for the match, though it does make me wonder why Dreamer had these things sitting around. Anyway, this was fine.

Cardona takes the third crate with him.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu at Hardcore Justice 2010. You need this on a taped pay per view? This eats up nearly ten minutes.

XXXL is having trouble keeping up with James Storm and Chris Sabin’s drinking.

Here is Sami Callihan to say he tries to help people, including Trey Miguel. It worked last week and under his mentoring, Miguel could reach the next level. Passion is about taking what you want and since Sami wants to be on Hardcore Justice, he is going to be on Hardcore Justice. The open challenge is on.

Sami Callihan vs. Sam Beale

Beale is Miguel’s student and Sami runs him over to start. Sami offers him a free shot and then knocks Beale down again. Beale’s face is rubbed into the mat and Sami bites him a bit before taking it outside. Some right hands have little effect on Sami, who snaps off a t-bone suplex to drop Beale again. Back in and Beale rolls him up for two so Sami nails a hard clothesline. The package piledriver finishes Beale at 4:05.

Rating: D+. This was a storyline advancement rather than a match and while I’m not a fan of the angle, it’s not like they spent a lot of time on it. Sami messing with Trey is either going to result in a big match at Rebellion or them being the Tag Team Champions. Neither is overly appealing but PLEASE DON’T MAKE THEM A REGULAR TEAM! Just let them fight and be done with it already.

We recap Brian Myers damaging Matt Cardona’s eye Jake Something’s eye. Therefore, it’s a hardcore blindfold match.

Brian Myers vs. Jake Something

Striker: “Look up the last time someone named Jake was in a blindfold match.” Good grief. They’re both blindfolded and there are weapons at ringside. Myers gets knocked outside early on and finds a trashcan lid to take Something down. In a smart move, Myers grabs him by the wrist and then finds another weapon to hit him in the head. They head back inside with Myers dropping him again and covering, albeit with Jake on his stomach.

Back up and Jake manages a sitout powerbomb, followed by some Scott Hall style shoulders while holding Myers’ wrist. Myers manages to find the referee and send him into Jake. The knockdown allows Myers to pull up the mask and hit a low superkick, which draws out Cardona with the third crate. Cardona slaps the mat for a distraction and slides Jake the crate. A shot to the head knocks Myers out and opens the crate, revealing a bunch of action figures. Jake hits a Boss Man Slam for the pin at 5:14.

Rating: D+. Another match that wasn’t supposed to be anything more than a fun idea that advanced a bigger story. In that regard it worked out well and it isn’t like this is going to be anything more than that. Cardona vs. Myers is slowly growing on me and as long as it doesn’t get treated as anything overly serious, it should work out well. Now give Jake a new last name and everything gets better.

Tommy Dreamer and his team (Rich Swann/Willie Mack/Eddie Edwards) are ready for Violent By Design.

Rosemary vs. Alisha vs. Havok vs. Jordynne Grace vs. Susan vs. Tenille Dashwood

Weapons match and the winner gets a Knockouts Title shot at Rebellion. Actually hold on as Su Yung comes out to attack Susan and we have a replacement. Yung is too much for Dashwood, who runs off rather than deal with her. Grace hammers on Alisha in the corner while Rosemary and Havok knock Young outside. That team lasts all of three seconds before they knock each other to the floor. Dashwood grabs Grace’s leg so the chase is on, meaning Kaleb With A K almost hits Dashwood with a frying pan by mistake.

It’s time for the staple gun and Kaleb With A K takes the shot to save Dashwood. That leaves Havok to legdrop Alisha for two with Grace making the save. The big staredown goes to Grace, who cuts off Alisha’s try with a trashcan. Grace plants Alisha for two with Yung making the save this time as you can see Susan being taken to the back (only took the referees the better part of ten minutes to help her). Yung beats on Grace until Havok comes in with a noose to take her down. Rosemary gets the Upside Down on Grace and it’s time for little red bag of thumbtacks.

Alisha hits something like a reverse DDT to drive Rosemary into them before whipping out a kendo stick (which is dubbed Kendra). Yung gives Alisha the Mandible Claw to cut that off and drag her away, which can’t end well. Havok and Grace slug it out with Havok knocking her down (allowing Striker to get in the always wrong “they’re all the same height on the mat”) and going up. Cue Nevaeh to throw powder in Havok’s eyes though and Kaleb With A K adds a superkick. Grace is back up with a Vader Bomb to Havok but Dashwood comes in and steals the pin at 9:43.

Rating: C-. This started to drag a bit in the middle but Dashwood winning actually surprised me. It is nice to see her FINALLY moving up as she has every tool imaginable but for some reason nothing has clicked yet. The weapons were a pretty minor part here but hopefully this leads to Yung returning full time. Susan isn’t working so give us what works better for a change. Not much of a match, but the right person won.

XXXL is very drunk but still want their match. James Storm says it’s time…..to play beer pong apparently. Chris Sabin throws the ball at the cup and knocks it off the table, so Larry D. offers to show him how it’s done. This misses completely, with Swinger dubbing him Knuckleball Schwartz. Storm throws a ball at Larry and the fight is on with Storm and Sabin standing tall, allowing Storm to drop a ball in the cup for the win. Swinger panics because he forgot to pay for his insurance.

Deonna Purrazzo talks about how important Jazz is but her time has passed. Tonight Purrazzo will prove that and it is title vs. career.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jazz

Jazz is challenging with her career on the line. An early spinwheel kick gives Jazz two and she starts in on the arm. That’s fine with Purrazzo, who catches her with an arm snap across the top rope. The armbar is on but Jazz gets in an elbow to the face, only to get pulled into a Downward Spiral for two. Purrazzo stays on the arm and ties Jazz’s limbs around the bottom rope for a change of pace. Some kicks put Jazz on the floor so she has to pull herself back in, allowing Purrazzo to stomp away some more.

They head outside with Purrazzo hammering away until Jazz runs her over. It’s time to throw in some weapons and they head inside again, with Jazz nailing the snap jabs. An X Factor gets two but Purrazzo goes after the arm again to take over. The title is brought in but Purrazzo pulls it away and chairs her down. A DDT onto the chair gives Jazz two and frustration is setting in. Jazz can’t get a double chickenwing so Purrazzo snaps off an exploder suplex. The Queen’s Gambit retains the title at 13:08.

Rating: C+. They were going for the big, emotional moment here and came pretty close to nailing it. Jazz might not be the biggest legend of all time but she has wrestled everywhere and done pretty well for a long time, so it is more than ok to give her something like this. Solid enough match too, making this feel like a good co-main event.

Post match Purrazzo leaves and Jazz gets the big sendoff, with Jordynne Grace coming in to thank her. This would be a lot better if Striker would shut up about Mama calling on the Louisiana wind and her children always waiting. Just….stop talking sometimes man.

Tommy Dreamer has been attacked so the main event will be 4-3.

Eddie Edwards/Willie Mack/Rich Swann vs. Violent By Design

This a Hardcore War, meaning WarGames (minus the cage) with two men starting for three minutes and the team who won a coin toss (Violent By Design) sending in another man after two minutes. Two minutes later, the other team evens things up. Once all eight are in, it is the first fall to win with No DQ of course. Eddie Edwards and Deaner start things off on the floor as Striker wants Dreamer to come out in the Willis Reed or Kirk Gibson moment.

They knock each other around on the floor before heading inside, where Eddie hits a belly to belly suplex. That sends them back outside…and then get back in, with Eddie hammering away to take over. The Backpack Stunner connects as time expires, with Striker, who read the rules earlier, not being sure who has the advantage. Rhino is in to make it 2-1 and the slow beating is on. Brown talks about how Rhino has changed, to the point where Rhino won’t even speak to him.

As I try to imagine Brown and Rhino as a team with Rhino doing the head shake, Willie Mack, with Kenny and a chain (which Striker thinks sounds like a country song) comes in to even things up. The good guys take over with various weapons shots, including a toaster (Brown: “I love French toast.”) until Joe Doering comes in to make it 3-2.

Edwards and Mack jump the monster but he knocks both of them down at once without much trouble. Deaner puts Mack’s hand in the toaster and bends it back until Rich Swann is in to even it up. Swann cleans house, including kicking Doering low, with a handicap parking sign. With Violent By Design down, Swann and Edwards set up a table at ringside as Eric Young comes in to complete the villains.

Young brings in a hockey stick to beat on people in various painful ways until the countdown is on and…..Trey Miguel evens things up with a golf club. Miguel gets in Doering’s face and gets crushed with a crossbody, which has Striker loudly thanking God for Doering. Deaner beats on Mack but gets caught with Swann’s handspring cutter. Rhino Gores Swann through a table in the corner for two, meaning it’s time to go to the corner.

The Tower of Doom plants everyone but Doering, who puts Eddie on a table outside. Miguel gets up with a top rope Meteora to drive Doering through Eddie through the table though, leaving Mack 3-1 inside. Rhino is sent outside and a pop up Downward Spiral gets two on Doering with Young making the save. Young is back up with the piledriver to finish Mack at 20:25.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good but felt a bit like the hold house show versions of WarGames in the NWA days. Yeah it’s a big, violent match but don’t expect anything taken to the next level. Miguel coming in to replace Dreamer was a surprise and Dreamer not getting the spotlight was nice. They did well enough for a main event here, but it’s no classic, at least partially due to Striker’s odd obsession with Doering.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure how much more you were expecting from a hardcore themed show over Wrestlemania weekend. It advanced some stories and gave us a few good moments with some talented wrestlers. For $10, that’s about all you can ask for and it worked out as well as could be expected. Nothing worth seeing on here, but if you throw it on, you won’t have the worst time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: November 7, 2006
Location: Mark of the Quad, Moline, Illinois
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

We’re coming up on December To Dismember and that means the Extreme Elimination Chamber is coming. You might consider this a warning, but we need to have some more participants set for the thing. I’m not sure what else we are going to have on the way there, but this place is in need of something fresh. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with Paul Heyman dressing like a gorilla to attack Rob Van Dam from behind. Heyman can be a weird guy.

Opening sequence.

Extreme Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Mike Knox vs. CM Punk

Knox sends Kelly Kelly to the back to make him even more of a heel. They trade shots to the face in the corner to start with Punk kicking him in the head for two. Knox elbows him in the face though and starts stomping away until Punk ties him in the ropes for something close to the Anaconda Vice. The springboard clothesline sends Knox outside and an Oklahoma roll gives Punk two back inside. Knox knees him in the back for two and a backbreaker makes it worse.

We hear about these two being parts of Team Rated RKO and Team DX at Survivor Series as a backbreaker gives Knox two. Punk fights out of a chinlock so Knox powerbombs him down. That doesn’t last long though as Punk is back up with the series of forearms but another backbreaker gives Knox another two. Knox takes him up top but a superplex is broken up, allowing Punk to hit a high crossbody. The Anaconda Vice makes Knox tap.

Rating: C-. This was about all you could have expected, though I can’t imagine this is the end of the feud. Punk is a rising star and Knox could be any muscle headed numskull who is there to stand in his way. The Kelly Kelly factor still needs to be dealt with, but for now this was all it needed to be.

Elijah Burke and Sylvester Terkay are now in ECW. Well they certainly are new.

Here is Paul Heyman, with security and gorilla head, for a chat. He promises announcements tonight but first of all, we take a look at him attacking Rob Van Dam last week. That’s why tonight it’s Van Dam/Hardcore Holly vs. Big Show/Heyman himself. One more thing: we already have four participants in the Extreme Elimination Chamber and a fifth will be named tonight. Therefore, we’ll have the final name announced next week, and it can be anyone from Raw, Smackdown or ECW.

CM Punk will be on Ghost Hunters tonight.

Daivari vs. Little Guido

Great Khali is here with Daivari and Trinity is here with Guido. It’s a brawl to start with Daivari getting the better of things and ripping at Guido’s face on the ropes. A sunset flip doesn’t do much for Guido as Daivari sends him into the buckle for his efforts. Guido gets in a dropkick for two but it’s the hammerlock DDT to give Daivari the fast pin.

Post match Khali lays out Guido again.

Here’s what John Cena has done to promote the Marine.

Extreme Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Test vs. Tommy Dreamer

Test elbows him in the face in the corner to start but Dreamer is right back with the Cactus Clothesline. That earns Dreamer some rams into the post to keep him in trouble and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Make it an armbar, followed by a chinlock as Test can’t make his mind up. Dreamer fights up and hits a neckbreaker but the DDT is blocked. The referee misses a low blow from Test and it’s a big boot into the TKO for the pin.

Rating: D+. Another match where there wasn’t a ton of drama coming in but that’s fine. Sometimes you need to just get the job done and that is what they did here. I know Dreamer is the ECW original but is anyone asking to see him in a big time title match? Test might not be much, but he’s higher on the food chain than Dreamer right now.

Rob Van Dam/Hardcore Holly vs. Big Show/Paul Heyman

Heyman is in a track suit and has the security with him. Van Dam goes for Heyman to start but gets knocked down by Show, who takes him into the corner. Heyman is bouncing up and down on the apron as Show hammers away on Van Dam. It’s too early to dive over for the hot tag as Show takes him down again and chokes away on the mat. The fans are actually chanting for Holly, which is about as bizarre as you can get.

Holly goes outside to scare security away from Van Dam, causing Heyman to panic and shout about keeping Holly back. A running clothesline drops Van Dam again and Show holds his arms back so Heyman can get in a few slaps. Van Dam tries slugging away and gets dropped with another clothesline. Show misses a charge though and gets caught with a spinwheel kick in the corner. Van Dam gets over for the tag….and Holly turns on Van Dam because of course he does. The referee throws it out as Holly chairs Van Dam down.

Rating: C. They weren’t really hiding what they were going for here as Holly didn’t do anything physical until the end of the match. The more I think about it, the more I think this might be a better move, as Punk is starting to move up the ladder and can be the second face on the show. I know Holly was getting cheered, but he is going to have a pretty firm ceiling above him no matter what. It might not be the best move in the short term, but it is in the long term.

The Alabama Slam onto the chair leaves Van Dam laying to end the show as Styles thinks Holly is working with Heyman to get into the Chamber.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here, but rather the fact that they have something to build towards. It gives the show a much needed structure and narrative, which have been lacking for most of its run so far. I’m curious as to who is going to be the final entrant, but they could absolutely use another name from outside to build up the roster. Not a great show, but an encouraging one.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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As always, please click on all of the videos if you can and get on the site’s Facebook page.

How Becky Lynch Could Return At WrestleMania 37.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/possible-plans-becky-lynchs-return-wrestlemania/

VIDEO: The Great Debate: Greatest WrestleMania Title Win.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/video-great-debate-greatest-wrestlemania-title-win/

Historic Announcement Made For WrestleMania 37.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/historic-announcement-made-wrestlemania-37/

Surprise Winner Of The Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/surprise-winner-andre-giant-memorial-battle-royal/

What It Would Take For Rock To Return To WWE..

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/take-rock-return-wwe/

Peacock Edits Off Another Monday Night Raw Segment.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/peacock-edits-off-another-monday-night-raw-segment/

Here’s The Reason The Hurt Business Was Broken Up.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/heres-reason-hurt-business-broken/

Insane Becky Lynch Angles That Almost Took Place In WWE.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/insane-becky-lynch-angles-almost-took-place/

Violence X Suffering: Lucid Dreams
Date: April 9, 2021
Location: Cuban Club, Ybor City, Florida
Commentators: Various

We’re back with another midnight show from GCW’s the Collective and that could mean a lot of things. I don’t know anything about this promotion or anything about this show, so as usual I’m coming in blind. That is kind of the point of a show like this, but hopefully they aren’t on until almost 3am again. Let’s get to it.

So the show is delayed due to the prior event running long and did not start until 1am.

Opening sequence.

Nick Gage says this is Violence X Suffering motherf*****.

The ring announcer screams and swears a lot. Oh yeah this is going to be a really long night. This goes on for a good bit as he keeps wanting us to be louder.

Here’s Rich Swann, whose entrance takes a good while because he gets in a lot of dancing. Then a fan calls him a fake Kofi, earning him a “F*** THIS GUY” from Swann. Apparently Tony Deppen isn’t here tonight so Swann is substituting, meaning it’s open challenge time.

Rich Swann vs. KTB

The much larger KTB grabs a waistlock to start but Swann slips out, only to be taken to the mat in an Oklahoma roll. That makes Swann look up at KTB as commentary keeps making music reference. Swann is back up with a dropkick into a hurricanrana for two but KTB is back with a chop in the corner. A running shoulder into a falling headbutt to the ribs gets two on Swann.

Some strikes to the face have KTB rocked but Swann dives into a spinebuster for two. We hit the chinlock but Swann fights up and nails a quick dropkick. The middle rope 450 gets two on KTB but Swann has to pull himself up. KTB catches him off the top for two more so Swann busts out the Lethal Injection for two. The frog splash gets the same so KTB gets up and drops him again, setting up a Lionsault for two of his own. Swann has had it with this and enziguris him down, setting up the middle rope Phoenix splash for the pin at 11:30.

Rating: C+. This was about as they could have done under the circumstances. It wouldn’t surprise me if the promotion found out that Deppen couldn’t be there and they just found whomever they could to fill in. Swann is a talented enough name with enough star power to make something like this work so they did everything they could and the match wound up working.

Respect is shown post match and we pause to sanitize the ropes.

Someone named Masa Slamavich is at ringside and doesn’t seem to be on the schedule.

AJ Gray vs. Daniel Garcia

Pure Rules, meaning three rope breaks, only one closed fist to the face and a much more technical focus. Both of them have seconds as well. They go with the grappling to start with the bigger Gray taking him down without much trouble. Back up and Gray’s shoulder doesn’t do much good so Garcia takes him down into a leglock. Gray reverses that into some kind of a weird Figure Four variation to put Garcia in trouble.

Garcia uses a rope break so Gray is right back with a very big backsplash to crush him again. They get up again and Garcia goes for the leg again, meaning Gray needs his own rope this time around. Garcia slaps on a front facelock and switches into a bodyscissors, meaning Gray needs another rope break. The chinlock goes on but Gray isn’t having this and powers up for a heck of a Death Valley Driver to drop Garcia.

A pair of powerbombs plants Garcia twice in a row but somehow he is back up with a Shining Wizard. Garcia grabs a Crossface and Gray’s escape means he is out of rope breaks. Back up and Gray smashes him with a lariat so Robert Martyr, Garcia’s second, puts Garcia’s hand on the rope. With that broken up, Gray grabs an STF and Garcia is in trouble. Martyr gets creative by pulling the rope back so it smacks Gray in the face (not a DQ because reasons) to stun him fairly well. The Sharpshooter, with Garcia leaning all the way back and pulling on the leg, makes Gray tap at 13:09.

Rating: C. This was a much more technical match and it was only so interesting in the first place. I’ve seen a few Garcia matches this weekend and they aren’t the most thrilling things. He is rather skilled with the technical stuff but he isn’t exactly interesting. It’s another case of someone just kind of being there and that doesn’t keep much attention. Gray is a hard hitter who can grapple and has some good charisma, which is a nice combination.

Post match Garcia doesn’t let go so Gray’s second comes in, earning a Sharpshooter of his own as Garcia isn’t seeming that nice. Martyr yells at Garcia, earning himself a piledriver and a Sharpshooter of his own. Masa Slamavich comes in and tells Garcia to hit her so Garcia tries, only to have to bail from a quick piledriver attempt.

KC Navarro/Marcus Mathers/Andy Brown/Ninja Mack/MV Young vs. TJ Crawford/Gabriel Sky/Ken Broadway/Myron Reed/Dante Leon

Elimination rules. It’s a big brawl to start with Ninja Mack hitting a big corkscrew dive off the top and back to back big flip dives off the middle/top ropes. Leon is back up with a reverse Spanish Fly off the middle rope to plant Mack. Sky and Navarro fight off to the side as no one is in the ring. They start throwing stuff at each other and you can barely see what is going on. Sky climbs onto a wall and flip dives onto everyone.

People keep walking around in the dark and hey we bother going back to the ring where Young powerbombs Sky into a half crab. That’s broken up and Sky hits a running knee to the side of the head. Young spears him out of the air for two as you can hear a fan explaining who the wrestlers are. Sky hits a top rope double stomp to get rid of Young at 7:47. Brown comes in and gets caught with an enziguri but someone crotches Sky on top. An AA into a Backstabber gets rid of Sky at 8:52.

A package piledriver gets rid of Leon at 9:45 so here’s Broadway to strike away at Brown. Broadway muscles him up with a German suplex and a bridging German suplex finishes Brown at 10:39. Navarro comes in and small packages Broadway for the pin at 11:04. Crawford grabs a sitout powerbomb on Navarro and a distraction sets up a brainbuster to pin Navarro at 12:34.

Mathers and Mack come in to kick away at Crawford with Mathers being sent outside in a hurry. Crawford hits a running kick in the corner and backdrops Mack out to the floor. Back in and Mack kicks him in the head but the middle rope Phoenix splash hits raised knees to give Crawford the pin at 15:23. I believe we’re down to Mathers vs. Crawford/Reed so Crawford hits a double underhook faceplant (think a double underhook Dominator) to drop Matters.

They fight to the apron with Mathers hitting a piledriver and Crawford is right back up in about ten seconds. Mathers gives him a low superkick and a flip DDT gets rid of Crawford at 18:40 and we’re down to Mathers vs. Reed. They slug it out and Mathers hits another flip DDT for two. Reed is sent outside but catches a dive and hits his hanging F5 off the apron onto the concrete. Back in and an Air Raid Crash finishes Mathers at 20:59.

Rating: D. The action was fine but commentary was perhaps the worst that I have ever heard. It wasn’t even commentary as much as one guy (the second was fine) did nothing but shout over and over again, probably screaming EAT THAT about 30 times, including after every single big move. This already isn’t my style of wrestling and then everything else about it is driving me crazy. They had a 20+ minute spot fest with the first ten minutes being spent walking around in darkness. The match itself was acceptable but my goodness commentary was a nightmare.

Brian Cage vs. Chris Dickinson

Well the star power just went up. Dickinson looks like he can barely walk due to some kind of a leg injury but he slugs away anyway. Cage is right back with a powerbomb and Dickinson is in trouble early. We go intelligent with the Indian Deathlock to stay on the leg but Dickinson crawls to the floor.

Cage follows him outside and hammers away as he is getting to pick his spots here. Dickinson is busted open and commentary starts making fun of his mom’s accent. Back in and Cage works on the leg again but Dickinson fights up and strikes away. A belly to back suplex sends Cage flying and they fight outside again with Dickinson hitting him in the ribs with a door. Back in and Dickinson manages a missile dropkick into a nip up but Cage is right back with a sitout powerbomb.

Dickinson knocks him down again and hits a running kick to the chest, followed by a delayed vertical suplex for two. Cage is right back with a shot to the knee though and the Figure Four goes on. That’s turned over so Cage blasts him with a clothesline, only to get caught in a dragon screw legwhip. Dickinson grabs his own Figure Four but Cage powers out of that as well. Cage runs him over and grabs another Figure Four for the tap at 14:42.

Rating: C. Who would have bet on some psychology in something like this? Granted when you have Dickinson barely able to walk to start it isn’t that hard to figure out, but this wasn’t what I would have expected. Nice stuff here, though it went longer than it needed to, especially given the injury and this time of night.

2 Cold Scorpio vs. Eli Everfly

This is Lucha Rules meaning….well I guess we’ll find out. Scorpio laughs at the smaller Everfly and dances a bit at the bell. Everfly is driven into the corner but comes out with a wristlock, which sends Everfly down without much effort. The armbar has Everfly in more trouble but he’s back up with a chop and a very springboardy headscissors.

Scorpio isn’t having this and hits a quick wheelbarrow German suplex to send him flying. A big clothesline drops Everfly again but he gets up top. That doesn’t work for Scorpio, as his fall away slam sends Everfly sailing. The half crab goes on but Everfly eventually slips out as commentary continues its worship of Scorpio, now trying to get him on Wrestlemania. Back up and a wheelbarrow Stunner gets two on Scorpio and Everfly kicks him to the floor.

One heck of a top rope moonsault takes Scorpio down again, even if Everfly’s legs hit him in the head. Back in and Everfly hits a top rope cutter for two more and they’re both down again. A running clothesline drops Scorpio again and a sunset flip is good for the same. Scorpio hits something like a Pele into the Tumbleweed for the pin at 11:54.

Rating: C+. The ending was a bit flat but they did a nice job of telling the story of Scorpio not taking him seriously enough and almost getting caught. Everfly can do all of the flips and you are only going to be able to get so far at that size. The story and action were good though and I can always go for some more of Scorpio.

Jordan Oliver vs. Jimmy Lloyd

This is billed as Ace vs. Ace. Oliver slaps him in the face to start and they get into the brawl. Lloyd gets driven into the corner for the chops and a running spinwheel kick makes it worse. Another shot sends Oliver outside but his suicide dive is cut off by a chair to the head. That puts Lloyd down and egads there is a lot of broken glass under there. Egads that’s from Spring Break that I’m watching later isn’t it? Back in and Oliver hits him with some chair shots to the head for two but Lloyd, now bleeding, gets in a few shots of his own.

Oliver sends him face first into a chair in the corner as commentary goes onto a rant about how worthless referees are. The turnbuckle pad comes off but Oliver is sent into it instead, drawing more blood. Lloyd sends him into a chair but Oliver is back with a series of strikes to put both of them down. Commentary can’t remember Oliver’s name, even as they knock each other down again. Oliver hits a German suplex but Lloyd is back with a pumphandle driver for two as one person tries the THIS IS AWESOME chant.

It’s time to bring in a third chair so Oliver uses the distraction to grab a German suplex for two more. A clothesline gives Oliver another near fall and it’s time to adjust the chairs. They get on the chairs until Lloyd piledrives him through the chairs for two. Well of course that’s only two. Oliver is back with a double underhook piledriver for a near fall of his own. With nothing else working, Oliver goes up for his super cutter but Lloyd hits him low for the pin at 14:44.

Rating: D+. This was another one those matches where they do a spot, then sit around, then do a spot, then set up some kind of a weapon spot, then do a spot, then we finally get to the point. Throw in the commentary being able to do very little that swear a lot and say EAT THAT and it was quite the long sit. Oliver is getting better in the ring in MLW, but Lloyd felt like one of those not so great hardcore guys and that made for a messy match.

They brawl to the back.

JTG vs. Dr. Cube

No DQ. Cube is a guy with a cube for a head from Kaiju Big Battel. JTG dives onto Cube and his people to start, with Cube losing his cube (as in the box around his head) early on. A powerslam gives JTG two with one of Cube’s lackeys making the save. Cube slaps away and whips JTG into the corner, where the turnbuckle pad falls off. JTG gets sent outside so the goons can stomp on him so he powerbombs one onto the rest of them.

Back in and Cube hits a top rope knee to the back of the head for two and commentary keeps swearing about how bad the referees are. Cube’s goons come in again and set up a bunch of tables and doors, with a double chokeslam putting JTG through one such door. One of the goons hits a twisting shooting star to give Cube two. Now the goons bring in the light tubes to break over JTG’s back and he is cut BADLY. My eyes jumped up at how much blood was on his back but he comes back to clean house.

A double light tube shot to the back hits Cube but it’s time for the goons to come back in and beat JTG down again. Cube grabs the mic and gets in a shouting match with commentary…..and it’s freaking Big Cass coming in for the save. Cass cleans house and leaves JTG with Cube, who pours out thumbtacks. JTG hits him low and powerbombs him into the tacks, followed by a second for a bonus. A running Razor’s Edge into a powerbomb (close enough) finishes Cube at 14:04.

Rating: F. Nope. As amazing as JTG’s transformation is, this is every stupid hardcore trope that gives indy wrestling a bad reputation (whether it is deserved or not). Throw in the same EAT THAT commentary guy and the other one who wouldn’t shut up about how much he hated everything and this was about as irritating as it could have been. Just get on with the show already, and stop with the horrible commentary, please.

And now, a Lio Rush music video. Or at least part of one.

Low Ki vs. Lio Rush

I’m not big on either of them, but at least we should be in for a heck of an upgrade after the previous match. Feeling out process to start but the pace picks up in a hurry with Rush doing his running dodges. A kick to the face puts Rush on the floor and he needs a breather. Back in and a test of strength goes to Ki, who kicks him into the corner and hammers away. Ki suplexes him down for two but Rush fights back up as commentary says this is the White Ranger (Rush) vs. a bus boy (not Rush).

Rush’s comeback is cut off and Ki grabs a chinlock to keep him down. Back up and Rush slides into the corner to counter a whip as commentary (apparently Joey Janela of all people) starts singing. A handspring elbow drops Ki and a hurricanrana gives Rush two. Rush loses his shirt and a Falcon Arrow gets two on Ki as Janela talks about liking veal.

They go up top with Rush snapping off a super hurricanrana but Ki rolls through into a double stomp. Commentary talks about eggplant as Rush fights out of the Ki Crusher. Rush hits a hard DDT for two but misses Rush Hour. Ki gets up top for the double stomp and the pin at 10:09.

Rating: C. Yeah this was fine. It was late and they were rushing around, but it’s not like it mattered at this point. Granted when commentary is ignoring the match to talk about anything else that comes to mind, there isn’t much that the wrestlers can do no matter what. Completely acceptable wrestling and that’s all it needed to be to be an upgrade.

Overall Rating: D+. There were good parts to this, but the bad outweigh the good so badly that it completely ruins anything positive that could come out of the show. Ignoring the extreme/hardcore nonsense and commentary completely ruining more than one match, it just wasn’t that good in several parts. You really can tell the difference in the talent levels though, as the bigger name wrestlers were on a different planet in almost every possible way. There are worse shows, but the bad stuff is some of the stuff I can’t stand the most on this kind of show.

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