Summerslam Count-Up – 2007 (2013 Redo): Welcome Home

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2007
Date: August 27, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles, Taz

Kane vs. Finlay

Back in and Finlay gets in a shot to the bad ribs to knock Kane to the outside. A backsplash to the bad ribs is good for two and Finlay puts on a half crab. This has been very physical so far. Kane finally powers up and hits an enziguri to escape. A big boot drops Finlay and some clotheslines in the corner stagger him. Kane hits a one armed side slam which is a bit of a stretch given the rib injuries. JBL is doing a great job on commentary here, talking about how a rib injury affects how you move in the ring.

Rey Mysterio is coming back! Tonight! Why did we need a promo for this?

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito vs. Umaga

No real story here other than Umaga is defending and these two are at the Intercontinental level. Kennedy tries to negotiate and gets punched in the face by Umaga. Carlito loads up the apple but gets punched as well, giving the champion complete control so far. The challengers fall out to the floor and finally start going after Umaga at the same time, though it has the same result. Carlito gets in a cheap shot from behind to send Umaga to the floor and Kennedy rams the champion into the steps.

Back in and Carlito gets two off a rollup but gets caught using the ropes. Everyone in this is either a heel or close enough to call them one. Carlito hits a springboard back elbow to the jaw for two on Kennedy but gets caught in a Stroke for no cover. Instead Kennedy goes after Umaga but gets pulled to the floor instead of getting in a cheap shot. Umaga hits a middle rope headbutt on Carlito but Kennedy saves Carlito from a charging Samoan.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Back in and Rey goes up but gets caught in the Tree of Woe which is similar to what hurt his knee in the first place. Guerrero goes right for the knee and asks him if he quits. Off to the Brock Lock (Chavo bends the knee around his neck) but Rey counters into a headscissors. Chavo stays on him though and hooks another leg lock until Rey FINALLY gets out with a kick to the head.

Rey hits a seated senton off the apron before hitting a hard kick to the head for two. Chavo catches a springboard moonsault press but gets countered into a tornado DDT for two. Chavo comes right back with a Gory Bomb for two followed by two of the Three Amigos. Rey spins out of the third and takes Chavo into the ropes for the 619 and the springboard splash for the pin.

Divas Battle Royal

Beth Phoeix, Torrie Wilson, Victoria, Layla, Brooke, Kelly Kelly, Kristal Marshall, Michelle McCool, Mickie James, Jillian Hall, Melina, Maria

Wrestlemania 24 is in Orlando.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison

HHH vs. King Booker

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Batista destroys Khali with the chair post match. Even JBL rips into Khali for such a lame ending.

We recap the main event. Cena has been champion for eleven months and Orton has been rising up the card as the legend killer. He was named #1 contender on Raw and spent the next several weeks RKOing Cena.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Ratings Comparison

Kane vs. Finlay

Original: C

Redo: B-

Carlito vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Divas Battle Royal

Original: F

Redo: D

CM Punk vs. John Morrison

Original: B+

Redo: C

HHH vs. King Booker

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Great Khali vs. Batista

Original: D-

Redo: F

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

DANG I liked this way too much the first time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/10/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2007-hhh-is-back-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2007 (Original): They’re At It Again

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2007
Date: August 26, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, JBL, Joey Styles

Well, it’s somewhat different this year but not by a lot. For one thing, Cena is the undisputed top guy in the company now, even surpassing HHH and Batista. HHH has been out of action since the Fall after tearing his quad again, and tonight is his epic return facing Booker T for no apparent reason other than he’s a big name for HHH to beat on. Your main event is Cena vs. Orton for the title, so you can really see how much difference two years makes.

I mean seriously, Cena was champion two years ago, so it’s not like they’re doing the same thing this year or anything. This was at the beginning of Orton’s rise to being one of the top dogs in the company as he is at the moment. He’d go on to win the title in about two months.On the Smackdown side, we have Batista vs. Khali. I don’t even need to make fun of that yet. Finally, the ECW Title has become much closer to what it is today, as we have Morrison vs. Punk for the belt. Also, this is about two months after the Benoit tragedy, and I’m going to leave it at that.

It’s the 20th Summerslam and we see the logos from all of the previous shows. That’s cool as I’ve been through them all recently so it’s like going through a photo album. They talk about how this is Rey’s return and the two world title matches, and then it happens. The screen flickers and we cut to an intro that’s designed after the 6 Million Dollar Man as this whole thing becomes about HHH.They talk about how Booker comes to Raw and this is apparently over who the real king is. Well at least they have a story behind it. Booker would be gone within two months and in TNA within three months. It’s a good video, but HHH should not be placed above the two title matches, period.Oh dang it I forgot about this horrid theme song. It’s by some annoying hip hop singer and it just sounds completely out of place. Wrestling is supposed to be about rock and roll, not bad hip hop/pop music.We intro the show with a all three commentary teams. JR and Lawler more or less say they know Booker has absolutely no chance at all.

Kane vs. Finlay

As best I can tell, Kane is the face here. Finlay only weighs 233lbs? Wow that’s weird. This was around the time that Finlay did nothing but hit people with his stupid club. The crowd is popping for Kane so I’ll bet on him as the face. They talk about how Kane is being pushed at the moment, even being credited with injuring Edge. For the life of me I don’t get why Kane has never gotten a world title reign that’s more than a single day.

With some of the people that have been given the belt, you can’t tell me that a guy that’s been around 12 years and has jobbed to everyone asked of him shouldn’t get a world title reign with some length. I’m not suggesting he headlines Wrestlemania, but would it hurt to let him hold it for 2-3 months or even a single month? Dreamer did it and Kane is a far bigger name and star than Dreamer is. Put the title on Kane for a bit. It’s not like he’s Barry Horowitz or something.

Yes I’ve always been a bit of a Kane mark. Kane’s ribs are hurt here as the big white tape implies, but it’s not really clear. He’s only got about 10 inches of tape. If he wants it to be clear it has to be 11 inches. Oh crud it’s the leprechaun. He’s the Cruiserweight Champion here too. It’s sad that a belt that was an integral part of WCW’s rise to prominence is now a horrible prop for a guy like this.

Why is this guy still doing this two years later. It’s just completely stupid. Anyway he causes Kane to get distracted but Kane fights back, but the ribs keep him from using the chokeslam. This crowd is way hot. Oddly enough, even though Kane couldn’t get Finlay up earlier, after another club to the ribs he CAN get him up, which is enough for the pin.

Rating: C. There we have it. The official modern starting system for PPVs is now in place, as we have a rather pointless match opening the show rather than something fast paced and exciting, because there’s just no room on the card for anything else. This is why the WWE’s PPVs aren’t as interesting to me anymore.

There are three matches now that have to be built up as main event level matches along with any other major match on the card, and it leaves no room for filler or just a good match that gives the audience a chance to look at an up and coming star.

If you have two 15-20 minute world title matches, that’s two 7-10 minute midcard matches that you can’t have, taking away at least 4 wrestlers’ chance to show what they can do on a major show. Instead we have feuds like this that go nowhere between two guys that don’t need this time. It’s the problem with the triple brands as well as the problem with having only one company, as none of these people could just be let go.

In the back, Coach is with Armando, Regal and Teddy, the three GMs. Vince comes in and asks why is there a party with all men? He asks them to find the mother of Hornswoggle, or at least the person that would later be revealed as Hornswoggle since he asks for the mother of the bastard son, who I don’t think we ever saw. Santino comes in and says nothing of importance and is thrown out. MVP comes in and asks why he’s not wrestling tonight.

I’d tell him to see my above rant but I haven’t mastered talking into the past yet. He says he wants to issue an open challenge to Matt Hardy which has a rant coming later on. Regal implies that he could be the son before leaving. I love how it was just assumed that Vince’s child was in the WWE and not maybe an accountant in West Virginia.

Rey Mysterio is coming back….TONIGHT! Yeah we were told this about 15 minutes ago.

IC Title: Kennedy vs. Umaga vs. Carlito

Ok, so maybe at this point there still was a bit of a midcard to speak of. Around this time the IC Title was actually doing really well. Guys like Hardy, Nitro (Morrison), Umaga, Kennedy and Carlito were fighting over it so you were at least having the midcard come in and fight over it. Then Jericho came in and killed things dead, which is a shame.

It would be another year when Santino won it for a second time and turned it into a complete joke that the title died for the most part, with it taking Rey and Jericho’s feud over it to turn it back into something special. Kennedy is over here or at least predictable as the fans are chanting what he’s going to say and reacting well to it. Carlito gets less than no reaction. He was in desperate need of new music at this point as it just didn’t fit his character at all.

It amuses me that of these three, only Carlito is still with the company. This is happening because of a double pin between the two challengers on Raw. JR continues his epic commentary career by saying that Umaga is going to come at everyone in this match hard, especially Kennedy and Carlito. Yeah, I’d say that’s true as that IS everyone in the match. Apparently Kennedy injured Lashley. Kennedy hurting someone? You don’t say!

Carlito hits a springboard back elbow, instantly making him cooler to me. Kennedy hits a Stroke, which he sets up exactly like he did with the Mic Check. That was something that was always an issue with Kennedy. Until he got the Mic Check, he used at least three finishers inside of a year that I can remember. He never would just pick something and stick with it.

Kennedy goes to the floor and rips up a table, stealing a monitor. He slams it squarely into the post which is called the head of Umaga, knocking him out. The challengers double team him but in a very cool spot, go for a double suplex that is countered into both of them being suplexed with one arm. With all three men down the referee starts counting to which JR says he’s not sure why. I don’t know Ross, MAYBE BECAUSE IT’S HIS JOB???

In an ending that feels rushed, Kennedy hits that rolling Death Valley Driver thing that I don’t think had a name that stuck, but Umaga casually comes in, pulls Kennedy up and spikes him for the pin to retain. That just felt rushed and WAY too sudden.

Rating: C+. This just felt very rushed at the end. I like that there was an actual midcard match here, but it was treated like a filler, which it shouldn’t have been. This was ok, but it could have been FAR better.

In another head scratching moment, we see a video talking about how Taker returns at Unforgiven. Ok, that’s fine. However, they say that no one has ever beaten him up like Henry did. Ok, let’s see. Set on fire twice, buried alive twice, beaten unconscious by Khali and Lesnar, beaten down badly by Kane many times, yeah Henry isn’t even in the top ten all time. I love the rewriting of history. Actually I don’t but oh well. This of course is ruined by that horrid pop song that is the theme. Undertaker does not need to be associated with bad pop music.

We get a recap of Rey vs. Chavo. Chavo injured Rey’s knee so that Rey could go have surgery, beating him in an I Quit match. It was followed by him wearing Rey’s mask and being annoying. They actually tried to make Chavo be a major heel, which of course just completely failed for the simple reason of he’s Chavo Guerrero.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

So yeah we’re doing the same match this year with a different storyline. It’s much better this year though as it’s about the two of them and not about Eddie. Rey does that thing where he springs out of the stage that I’ve always liked. In something I remember from the LD, Rey is painted silver. What is his obsession with super heroes? This is the continuation of the feud from last year which has no Eddie mentions now, so at least they got the hint that it was horrible.

Despite Rey being painted silver, JBL says he’s been bronzed. JBL goes on to say that Chavo will go for the knee until he either gets it or he won’t. Thank you for that one John. To continue his epicness, he says Pedro Martinez, but Michael Cole cuts him off so we have no idea what his point was going to be. Naturally the main point here is how strong Rey’s knee is. We get the Pedro reference from earlier as he talks about how Pedro’s shoulder was bad and he’s not throwing as fast anymore.

Ok that at least makes sense. See, if Cole hadn’t cut JBL off then we could have gotten a decent point out of JBL instead of him sounding like an imbecile. The paint is coming off of Rey and it just looks funny with streaks of skin showing through. Chavo works on the knee, including a bunch of holds where the knee isn’t moved at all. JBL calls Cole a parrot which is funny. Chavo gets kicked in the head and conveniently falls into the ropes in position for a 619.

I love how that happens for no one but Rey. It doesn’t hit as the knee gives out. For no reason at all Chavo goes for a slam and his knee goes out for a two. That was random. For the 100th time, JBL says that we won’t know how solid Rey’s knee is until it’s tested. WE GET IT.

Rey is mostly skin again so it looks like his mask is leaking or something. Yet again after more punishment on the knee it improves enough to go for the 619. It misses and Chavo goes for the three suplexes. This works again as Eddie is never mentioned. The fans boo him though so everything is right with the world. A 619 and springboard splash ends this.

Rating: B-. This was light years ahead of last year because the story was about these two and not Eddie, who wasn’t needed last year and this is proof of it. Rey was healthy here and you could see that he was fine. Chavo as a major heel is stupid though, and JBL’s commentary is actually quite bad as he does little other than repeat himself. This was fine though and even good at times.

Raw is on Sci Fi tomorrow.

Booker is in the back with Todd. The king says that HHH will have little to be happy about tonight. Book sounded weird here as he sounded unhappy with what he was doing and he stumbled a bit. It was almost like he was nervous.

Divas Battle Royal

The winner faces Candice at some time in the future. Candice comes out first and does nothing of note, other than have a really annoying theme song. Since all of them start at once, here they are in the order they’re introduced: Maria, Beth, Melina, Jillian, Mickie, Torrie (she’s still there at this point?), Victoria, Krystal, Michelle, Brooke, Layla, Kelly. Yeah, raise your hand if you know who’s winning this already.

It’s kicking and punching and hair pulling a go-go here as that’s all most of these girls can do at this point. I’m so bored right now I can’t put it into words. People are being eliminated here and the announcers aren’t even calling it. You can tell they’re bored out of their minds too. Candice is actually sitting in a director’s style chair with palm fronds sticking out of the back of it. I can’t think of words to describe how awful this is.

Beth is very loudly heard calling spots to the girls that have no clue what they’re doing. Apparently this isn’t over the top rope as Victoria goes between the bottom and middle ropes and is gone. Can this please end any faster? They’re all wearing pink or orange for the most part so it’s hard to even tell who everyone is. The final four are Melina, Beth, Torrie and Michelle. Final two are Michelle and Beth. This lasts all of 4 seconds as Beth wins. Thank goodness this is over.

Rating: F. It was sloppy, it was long, it was boring. What more do you expect of a grade here?

With literally no transition, MVP comes out with people carrying a cooler. Literally, we see Candice and hear his music in the same shot. He says no one cares about the Divas. That’s just comical because it’s about as close to true as you can get. He talks about how he’s better than everyone else and challenges Matt to a beer drinking contest. This was during the time that MVP was hurt and it derailed the Matt beats MVP for the title storyline.

The problem was simple: this feud had been going on for awhile now and Matt wouldn’t win the title until the END OF MAY. Part of this was that Matt’s appendix burst, putting him on the shelf for a few months. Vince was I guess obsessed with Matt beating him for the title as he let this drag on for nearly a year. The problem was that we stopped caring. These two competed in everything: arm wrestling, boxing, pizza eating, basketball, beer drinking, and I could go on for a good while longer.

The problem was simple: we wanted something new and we couldn’t get it because of the injuries. Just go to someone else! Hardy gets something close to a pop I guess. Apparently this coming Friday these two have a tag title shot. That was another segment of this feud. This is just stupid as they argue for even longer to fill more time. Matt says he won’t even try.

He talks about how a few weeks ago, MVP got Evander Holyfield to substitute for him, and I think I know where this is going. Yep, the glass shatters and Steve Austin is here. This segment just got better and now it’s no longer filler. The fans are going nuts for this. I love the line JBL says. Cole is talking about how it’s completely fair as MVP did the same with Holyfield. “It’s completely different. That was just Evander Holyfield. THIS IS FREAKING STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN!”

Only in professional wrestling would you hear that. Austin hits the ropes a few times and does some pushups. Only Austin would consider beer drinking an athletic event. He throws in some jumping jacks for good measure. He hasn’t said a word at this point either but the fans are WAY into him. They start drinking and Austin kicks him and stuns him of course. Two things: Austin kicks him in the title belt, so would that even make him keel over?

Second, MVP takes the stunner really well. He jumps backwards but not way too high like Hall did. That always just got annoying, but MVP more or less bounces back. That was well done. JBL’s ranting about how Austin isn’t a fair opponent is really quite funny.

Wrestlemania is coming to Orlando.

In the back with Vince and the GMs, Cryme Tyme shows up and says one of them could be his son. Vince is apparently not liking being called V Mac, but Vinny Mac was fine I suppose? This was back when CT was a big deal almost before being release for screwing up an official at a house show.

They start a dance party in the back, with Coach, Long and Regal dancing around Vince. Regal actually was quite good. He goes on his own but turns around to have Ron Simmons in front of him. A single obscenity follows.

Back in the arena the girl that does the theme song dances to her own song. Yeah that’s not stupid at all.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison

This was a very well built up feud. Morrison had taken Benoit’s spot and therefore his championship at Vengeance and has feuded with Punk since. He really hadn’t proven himself yet, but they built him up very well. They didn’t make him seem like a guy that was in over h,is head, but rather a rookie wonder, almost like Orton was three years prior to this.

Punk is very popular here as despite what the IWC would want you to think, Punk has been popular in WWE since the day he showed up and is way over to this day. Punk got this in a 15 minutes of fame match against Morrison, which was a cool idea: last 15 minutes or pin the champion in that amount of time and you get a shot. Punk chasing the belt for awhile was a good idea to me as it usually works best that way.

Obviously they didn’t want Morrison as their first choice, but he stepped up and made this work, and you can tell that it meant a lot to his career. Soon after this he would be paired with Miz for nearly a year and a half, forming one of the best tag teams in many years as Punk would become a major player in the company soon. This is a preview of the future of the company here, so it should be solid.

They start with a fast technical series which works really well for them. That’s a side you see from them both on a fairly decent rate and it’s working as always. Morrison hits a reverse neckbreaker, pulling Punk through the ropes and slamming his neck on the apron. That looked painful to say the least. This is a very fast paced match with neither guy getting a long lasting upper hand. The crowd is way into it also so it’s not just me that likes it.

Punk busts out a moonsault, and people say he’s bland in the ring. He uses all kinds of stuff. Anyway, Punk goes for a rana but Morrison holds on. He tries to get his feet on the ropes but misses them, which isn’t really his fault as he just couldn’t reach them. Either way, Morrison wins but Punk “got robbed.” I know that was lacking jokes, but this was just a freaking good match. It was very fast, both guys were sharp, the offense wasn’t boring, and the ending made great sense. I loved this.

Rating: B+. It was just barely 7 minutes and it left me wanting more. You can’t ask for much more than that. These two have always had great matches and this was no exception. This is a rare occasion when people called the future actually live up to that billing.

Raw is still on Sci-Fi tomorrow night.

Booker T vs. HHH

We start with a way too long recap of Booker humiliating JR and King. That’s fine as it sets the stage just a bit. Booker comes out and has the crown and robe and that’s all well and good. Now let’s get to the problem with this. The HHH return is so over the top here that it’s horrible. I’ll show you them both and you compare them  For one thing, just having his own face on his tights isn’t something I want to see. How ridiculous does that look? HHH of course gets beaten down at first, only to make the comeback. The basic idea here is that HHH is awesome, Booker is pretty good and Sharmell is annoying.

In something that I find amusing, HHH goes after Booker’s leg. While it’s not hurt, that’s a nice little thing that shows that HHH is thinking. I like it and yes, I’m making it out to be cooler than it really is. Anyway, Booker hits some big moves including the Book End, but HHH is up, because it’s his return match. Did you really expect him to lose? More on that later. Booker counters two Pedigrees here, one of which he does by just punching HHH’s leg. That’s so simple that it’s brilliant.

Anyway, of course HHH wins with a pretty weak looking Pedigree, but he gets it, and then a standing ovation from JR and King. Ok, there’s being glad a guy is back, and then there’s just flat out overkill. We get it: HHH is a great wrestler and one of the biggest stars ever. No one is questioning that, but this is just taking it too far. He celebrates for a long while, which I’m fine with, but don’t make it look like it’s the second coming.

Rating: B-. Eh, it was two A list guys so it had the star power. There was little story between the two, but in this case I like that better. This was about HHH returning, not HHH vs. Booker. It worked just fine in that regard. Yes the announcers were WAY over the top, but to be fair the storyline was written that way. Now, this is where the IWC showed how idiotic it was to me. I remember one of the first real arguments I got into on WZ was over this match.

There were people that said HHH was burying Booker here, as he hadn’t had a match in 9 months and he beats a major star. Ok, nonsense. Now I’ve made no secret of the fact that I’m not a huge HHH fan. Like Cena, I’m relatively indifferent to him. There are moments where I’ll applaud him and there are moments when I’ll boo him. However, there would be no justification at all for him losing here.

Yes, Booker is a major star. HHH is a bigger one. HHH was returning. Booker was doing nothing. He was put into this feud because he had nothing else to do on the show. It had been a year since he was in a top level angle, as he had a very short feud with both Taker and Matt Hardy. Remember those feuds? I don’t either. He had been out for about a month with an injury and came back to be put with HHH.

Booker was a world champion a year ago at this time, but in the world of professional wrestling, that’s an eternity. Booker had no business beating HHH. How is he being buried? He’s facing a bigger star and he lost. Did Hulk Hogan bury the One Man Gang or King Kong Bundy when he beat them? No he didn’t because they weren’t on his level, just like Booker isn’t on HHH’s level. Hopefully most people reading this just said duh at most of that, as I’d hope you have more intelligence than that.

Update: Undertaker is still returning at Unforgiven. Nothing has changed in the last hour.

We get a recap of Batista vs. Khali, which just isn’t going to be a good idea if my KB-sense is correct. Basically, Khali says he can’t be beaten and Batista says he can beat Khali. Khali debuts the head vice and that’s all there is to it.

Smackdown World Title: Great Khali vs. Batista

Batista is about 6’6 and he looks tiny, as does the belt and the chair. That’s freaking scary. It’s weird hearing the lack of the Punjabi Playboy music which is rather awesome actually and better than this is. Champion came out first here which is always kind of odd. The palm trees around the entrance are stupid looking.

Khali beats him down early and the Animal is in trouble early on. Big Dave gets in a bit of offense but walks into the chop to take him back down. Khali grabs the neck grip rather than slipping his hands up like 5 inches for the Vice Grip. Batista starts going on as this is already a very dull match. Yep the fans think this is boring. I can’t really argue much with that.

Cole tries to tell us that the fans are getting restless which is amusing. Bradshaw says Khali is monkey butt ugly. Well you can’t say he’s not blunt. Batista gets a spinebuster to get out of the Vice Grip but can’t get the Batista Bomb. Khali hits the Punjabi Plunge for two. Singh slides in a chair to Khali and there’s the cheap DQ. Really that’s it?

Rating: D-. Oy this wasn’t good. Vince instantly thinks that every muscle guy like Batista can do what Hogan did. That’s just not the case. Hogan was able to make the others look great because Hogan was a far better wrestler and thinker than he was given credit for. Neither of these guys have that mental aspect that makes a wrestler great. Their styles are far too similar and almost nothing Batista can do can make him look sensible or effective against Khali.

Batista isn’t nearly as bad as he’s made out to be, but this wasn’t a fair request of him. Now last year against Booker was a different story. Booker is a big guy, but not big enough that Batista couldn’t do something with him. This one is much harder to blame on the Animal as Khali is just too big to do anything with. That’s not his fault, but rather the person that green lit this match.

Post match, Batista gets the chair and beats Khali up. Or does he beat him down. Diagonally? Or is it horizontally?

The Condemned is on DVD.

Vince is in the back and Regal says there are some women here for him. You know who they’re going to be. Mae says she wants to be the mother of his next bastard son and shoves him onto a couch and kisses him. Moolah pulls her out by the hair and they leave. Vince says he liked it. Sadly, Moolah would pass away in about two and a half months due to complications from a shoulder operation.

We get a short recap of Cena vs. Orton. It’s a very basic concept. Cena has beaten every heel on the roster except one: Randy Orton. Cena turned around one night and got RKOed. It’s a very basic build but it made you think that Orton could do it. Cena had held the title longer than anyone in over twenty years at this point, so anything was possible. Orton had injured HBK, RVD, Dusty Rhodes, Slaughter and others, so it was a distinct possibility that he could take Cena out here as well.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

The fans are certainly going with the flow here as Orton is booed and Cena isn’t booed as loudly. He gets another mixed reaction which is something I’ve always liked. We get something you don’t see any more as the referee checks each guy for weapons. It takes a few seconds and makes things look more legit, so why not bring that back? Lawler mentions that Orton has a fan club in Lichtenstein.

That’s too absurd to make up so I’m going to assume it’s true. If so, that’s pretty cool to me. They start out with a headlock, which is about as basic of a move that you can start with, and in a big match it works every single time. Orton takes the early advantage and holds onto it for a good while, which also makes sense. They’re following a very basic formula here and there’s nothing at all wrong with that.

Since this is a long Orton match, we hit about the 4 minute mark in total chinlock time. That’s added to the two minutes of headlock time, making this match VERY BORING. We’ve been at this about 15 minutes and Cena has been in control about 45 seconds. Oh wait, could this be a comeback? Nope, Orton counters with that backbreaker he does which starts from what you ask? A chinlock. Of course this is the most damage that Cena has ever taken since that happens every match.

Oh and Orton is coldblooded. You’d think he was a reptile, or maybe even a viper. Yeah that string of jokes is getting old to me also. Of course Cena kicks out of the move that injured RVD because he’s John Cena blast it. Ross says Orton is Viper-like. And so it begins. Orton goes for the RKO but Cena shoves him off and we’re on the floor and more violence ensues. Back in, Cena starts his real comeback, this time with Orton being beaten down pretty well.

They go for the throwback, but they botch it and Cena comes at his head instead of his back, making it look like a running neckbreaker or Morrison’s diving neckbreaker that he used to do. They speed things up a lot as it’s both guys trying to hit their finisher. Orton gets caught in the STFU but gets the ropes.

Cena is ticked and despite Orton being in the hold for a good while, he hits the RKO out of nowhere. At least he sells the hold just after it so maybe I could go for that. Cena kicks out and the crowd is WAY into this. Cena is up way to fast and hits the fastest FU in history to win clean before collapsing from the RKO. Replays and photo opportunities close us out.

Rating: B. This is a tale of two matches. The beginning part of it is just flat out boring. However, the last 5 minutes of this is great stuff with the crowd eating from the palms of their hands. These two can bring it pretty well most of the time and this was fine. They built from slow to fast which is how things are supposed to go. This was a solid main event and should be in two weeks.

Overall Rating: B. This was a very back and forth show with good and bad stuff. Some of the matches are just flat out horrible and some of the matches are great. The ECW and WWE title matches are great as was the Austin segment. This was a solid show all around I think and while I’d avoid the Diva match and Batista’s match, the rest of the show is certainly good so it’s recommended.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – August 10, 2020: The Best Raw In At Least A Week

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 10, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

For the first time in a very long while, some interesting stuff actually took place last week. That would include both Raw Underground and the debut of Retribution, but the problem with any WWE story is that at some point it has to go somewhere, and that’s where they get lost. I’m not sure what to expect here and that scares me. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Kamala.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

We open with Samoa Joe in the ring for a contract signing. Seth Rollins comes out with Murphy, followed by Dominik, because they really do think this is what we should use to keep the fans’ interest early. Dominik comes out with a kendo stick and Rollins laughs him off for treating this like a joke. Joe doesn’t think much of Rollins treating this as a joke and asks why Rollins is acting like this. Why did he take out Rey Mysterio’s eye, have Murphy take out Aleister Black’s eye, and think about going for Joe’s eye last week?

Rollins threatens Joe and says that he himself is the only one with no choice in this whole thing. He goes into a rant about everything he has done around here with everyone not thinking anything of his efforts. All he is doing is for the greater good and when is it going to be enough? Dominik says it never will be because Rollins’ greater good is for himself. Rollins calls him ungrateful because everything Dominik is doing is because of him.

Dominik is ready to go, so Rollins says Dominik wouldn’t last ten seconds against him in a regular wrestling match. That’s why Rollins is going to do him a favor: Dominik can bring his kendo stick at Summerslam. Or any weapon he wants for that matter, so there are no excuses. Rollins and Dominik both sign, with Rollins being rather pleased.

Seth Rollins vs. Humberto Carrillo

Rollins grabs an armbar to start and sends Carrillo to the apron. Carrillo comes back in with a sunset flip and hammers away in the corner, only to get crotched on top. The belly to back superplex is broken up but Murphy’s distraction means no moonsault. Dominik kendo sticks Murphy though and Rollins gets the boots up to block the moonsault. A superkick sets up a powerbomb into the Stomp to finish Carrillo at 3:03.

Rating: D+. The match was decent enough but the lack of interest in anything they’re doing here hurts things a lot. There is only so much that can be done with such an uninteresting story and hopefully they make a change. It seems that they’re teasing Samoa Joe getting involved somehow, and that’s probably as good of a move as they can make. Dominik isn’t ready for this and that becomes ore obvious every week.

Post match Rollins and Murphy beat Dominik down, including a series of hard kendo stick shots. Rollins even takes the shirt off so the shots can hurt more. Murphy and Rollins tie him into the ropes with Rollins saying HI DAD over and over. With Dominik still helpless, Rollins has Murphy grab some more kendo sticks and now Murphy gets in his own shots. The double beating continues with Murphy saying that Dominik is a WWE Superstar now. This was a heck of a brutal beatdown with Dominik being destroyed and I do want to see him get back up and fight. Just find something else to say about him other than he’s Rey’s son.

Post break, commentary is rather serious about what we just saw.

Video on Retribution’s attacks last week.

Andrade vs. Angelo Dawkins

Before the match, Zelina insists that she had nothing to do with Montez Ford being poisoned. Why would she mess with the most important night of her team’s career? The Street Profits can have the smoke, because Angel Garza and Andrade want the Tag Team Titles. The lights go out again during Dawkins’ entrance because Retribution is around somewhere tonight. Dawkins jumps him from behind to start but Andrade gets in such a hard right hand that Dawkins loses his headband.

Back up and Dawkins hits a dropkick to send him outside, where Andrade sweeps the leg to send Dawkins face first into the apron. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Dawkins fights back with the clotheslines and the jumping spinning elbow. Andrade sends him into the corner again though and it’s the running knees for two. Back up and Andrade gets punched out of the air for no count as Vega has the referee. Cue Bianca Belair to pull Vega off the apron though and the spinebuster gives Dawkins the pin at 4:02.

Rating: C-. I was surprised by Dawkins winning here but it’s not like Andrade has been anything but a tag guy in recent months. The poisoning thing is interesting, but I’m hoping that they don’t go with some outsider and just have Vega be the person behind it. Go with what makes sense instead of the surprise in this one.

Bianca Belair vs. Zelina Vega

Joined in progress with Vega being driven into the corner and then muscled over with a snap suplex. Vega pulls her into a triangle choke but Belair powers out and hammers away in the corner. A poke to the eye gets Vega out of trouble again and she hits Belair in the face for a bonus. There are the running knees in the corner for two but Belair has had enough of Vega and tries the KOD.

That earns her some elbows to the face though and Vega headscissors her throat first into the middle rope. A crossbody is countered into a gorilla press drop though and Belair is annoyed again. Belair unloads on her with forearms to the back and throws Vega down with ease. Vega avoids a charge into the post and pounds away, only to get powerbombed out of the corner. The KOD is enough to finish Vega at 6:13.

Rating: D+. This was a scrappy one as Belair was pounding away on Vega as much as she could but Vega wasn’t quite enough of a threat to her. There is only so much that you can do here and Belair was only in limited danger. Again: go with what makes sense instead of something screwy and it’s that much better.

Post match Belair says she and Ford like to keep their careers separate, but Belair had to do something to stand up for her husband. Dawkins says Ford isn’t missing Summerslam and they’re bringing the ruckus and the red cups.

Here is the Hurt Business for the VIP Lounge. MVP says this is a more serious episode and talks about being the man who told you so. Last week, you had weird things going on with the lights going out in his match. He is a seasoned professional and a world class athlete but he can’t win titles in unsafe working conditions.

Cue Apollo Crews, to say MVP is always complaining and making excuses. MVP says Crews was the one who missed Extreme Rules because he had a bad neck. Crews says that he can make bad decisions because he’s a bad man. At Summerslam, the only lights that are going out are MVP’s. Crews charges the ring and throws the couch to the floor to clear the ring.

Apollo Crews vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title and joined in progress with Shelton driving him into the corner, only to have Crews flip forward and hit the dropkick. Benjamin throws Crews outside though and gets in a knee to the ribs as the referee keeps a close eye on the MVP and Lashley. Back in and we hit the chinlock until Crews fights up and hits a crossbody. Crews drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs and the Stinger Splash for a bonus. The Toss Powerbomb doesn’t work so Crews settles for a powerslam into the standing moonsault. Crews gets back up but Lashley offers a distraction, allowing Shelton to grab a rollup for the pin at 5:11.

Rating: C-. The athleticism was good, which shouldn’t be a surprise given who was in there, but it doesn’t quite make for a great match. This still seems to be building towards Crews vs. Lashley, though I’m not sure when we are actually getting there. Shelton not losing for a change is nice, though I’m still not thrilled with a champion losing again.

Post match Lashley goes after Crews with the full nelson but MVP calls him off because that would take him out of the title match again. Crews gets in a quick shot and runs off.

We go outside where Retribution throws a cinder block through a window with the WWE logo.

Mickie James is back and says she has gold on her mind. Lana and Natalya, in matching outfits, come in to say Mickie can’t be the face of the division without a Tik Tok. Natalya says she has won more than anyone else and that makes her the best of all time. Natalya and Lana: “HASHTAG BOAT!” Mickie says Natalya should know better and tells Lana that boats sink. Mickie leaves and the two of them call her rude. The new outfit didn’t help Natalya’s charisma.

Video on Raw Underground.

Ivar is flirting with a blonde when Erik, Ricochet and Cedric Alexander come up. The blonde says not to yell at Ivar because he’s cute. Not so much with Erik. How many times can they do that same joke? Ricochet and Cedric crack up.

We look at the beating of Dominik again.

Cedric Alexander/Ricochet/Viking Raiders vs. Akira Tozawa/Ninjas

Ricochet kicks a Ninja in the face to start and it’s a middle rope double stomp to the back into a Downward Spiral. Another Ninja gets kneed in the face and it’s off to Ivar for the knee to the ribs. Another one to the face rocks the Ninja but the third Ninja, who seems to be R-Truth in disguise, won’t get in. Tozawa yells at him and the other Ninja gets the Viking Experience for the pin at 1:10.

Post match it’s Truth and he rolls Tozawa up for the pin and the title.

Drew McIntyre promises to beat Randy Orton at Summerslam and make it clear that Evolution has passed him by. If Kevin Owens beats Orton tonight, he and Drew will be having a long talk.

Liv Morgan vs. Peyton Royce

Before the match, the IIconics accuse the Riott Squad of wanting to stab each other in the back. Morgan takes Peyton down to start and hammers away before they head outside. The brawl continues for a bit until Morgan sends it back inside for two off a rollup. Peyton gets kicked into the corner but Riott deals with an interfering Royce. That’s enough for Royce to get in a cheap shot and finish Morgan with the Deju Vu at 2:06.

Post match the Squad doesn’t see eye to eye again.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Shayna Baszler with Bayley and Asuka causing the no contest.

Shane McMahon is ready for Raw Underground.

It’s time for Raw Underground, with Cal Bloom vs. Riddick Moss. They fight in the ring and then brawl to the floor, with Moss sending him into a bunch of poles. Back inside and Moss slugs away again, eventually dropping Bloom with a shot to the head for the win. Good for them if this is a way to boost someone like that. The dancing girls are notably absent this week.

Asuka vs. Bayley

Non-title, Sasha Banks is with Bayley, and if Asuka wins, she gets the Raw Women’s Title shot against Banks at Summerslam. Asuka starts fast and hits the hip attack in the corner. Bayley catches her on top though and a sliding elbow gets two. Back up and a lot of shouting lets Asuka get two off a backslide, followed by a kick to the face. The lights flicker some more and it’s Asuka up first with a running shoulder into a release German suplex.

The hip attack gets two on Bayley and she gets tied up in the corner for a running stomp. That’s enough to send Bayley outside and we take a break, coming back to Bayley getting stomped down again. Bayley pulls her down into a kneebar of all things though and kicks away at the leg for a bonus. The referee gets distracted by yelling at Bayley, allowing Banks to ram the leg into the apron to give Bayley two. Asuka is right back up to pull her into a grounded Octopus and then a cross armbreaker.

Bayley stacks her up for two and then pulls Asuka into an Indian Deathlock of all things. Banks goes to taunt Asuka with the title, causing Asuka to reverse into a kneebar. That’s reversed as well and Asuka hits a running knee attack for two more. Asuka puts her on top but Bayley knocks her down, setting up the top rope elbow for another near fall. A sunset bomb sends Asuka into the corner but Bayley stops to mock Kairi Sane, only to get pulled into the Asuka Lock for the tap and the title shot at 15:05.

Rating: B. There is something interesting about Asuka being Bayley’s Kryptonite as Bayley has never beaten her in a singles match. What we got here was another good, hard hitting, back and forth match with two women beating the heck out of each other. I’m not sure how surprising the result was, but they had a good time getting there.

Back at Raw Underground, Arturo Ruas destroys an unknown.

Post break, Dabba-Kato destroys another unnamed victim, with a testicular claw included. Post match, Shayna Baszler gets up to get in the massive Kato’s….well chest actually but Shane breaks it up. Shayna goes to the ground and starts beating up a woman but a blonde makes the save. Shayna beats her up too, then does it again to a second blonde, who did show some submission skills. All three of them go after Shayna at once but she beats them all down with throws and strikes. The first blonde gets Kirifuda Clutched to give Shayna the win.

Retribution has turned over someone’s car and beat on it a little bit more.

Randy Orton vs. Kevin Owens

Ric Flair is here with Orton. Owens gets headlocked to start but they fight outside in a hurry. Orton pokes him in the eye, only to be sent face first into the announcers’ table. Back in and Owens stomps away before shouting a WOO at Flair. The Stunner doesn’t work so Owens goes with the superkick instead, setting up the Cannonball. Owens seems to bang up his shoulder on the landing, even as Orton bails to the floor. That’s fine with Owens, as he hits another Cannonball against the barricade and we take a break.

Back with Owens hammering away some more and throwing in a strut (with another WOO). Orton gets knocked outside but sends Owens’ bad arm into the steps and then the barricade. Back in and Orton rakes the boot over Owens’ face and drops a knee. The chinlock, with a rake to the eye, goes on but Owens is back up in a hurry. Owens hits a clothesline into the backsplash but Orton knocks him down again and puts him on top. Orton gets knocked off the top and the Swanton connects for two. The Stunner is blocked though and it’s the RKO to finish Owens at 13:16.

Rating: B-. That’s the kind of win that can give Orton a nice boost. Owens is a former World Champion so a win over him means something, while losing to Orton is hardly a major defeat. It helps that it was a pretty good match too, with Owens getting in quite a bit of offense.

Post match Flair poses with Orton, who wants a microphone. Orton asks Flair to hang on a second and we take a break. Back with Orton saying he loves Flair after all these years, but he shouldn’t have been in this match with Owens. Of course he cares about Flair, but they will not be together any longer. Flair is a liability to him these days and that can no longer be the case. About eighteen years ago, Flair bailed Orton out of trouble in Peoria, Illinois and Orton thinks that he did it because he wanted Orton to be the son that he never had.

Flair starts crying and Orton talks down to him over having a pacemaker and going into a coma last week. Is this the best that Flair can be? Flair says that he’s not the same man he was before but there are some things that Orton wants to hear. Of course Flair wants to be in the spotlight. He’s 71 years old and he’s on Raw. Flair wants to be there with Orton when he wins his 14th, 15th, 16th and 17th World Title. He doesn’t want to see Orton beat John Cena’s record, because it’s his record.

Orton knows what it’s like to be where Flair was because Orton’s dad did it for years. Flair knows Orton is the greatest of all time and as soon as he got out of intensive care for 31 days and out of a coma for 12 of them, all he wanted to do was tell the people he cared about that he loved them. All he is now is Charlotte’s dad so he wants to have a good time with Orton.

They hug, but Orton hits him low and leaves Flair laying. Orton looks down at him, goes to the corner, waits for the lights to flicker, and then hits the Punt (with the lights off so we don’t see the contact in a clever way around it) to end Flair. Orton whispers something to Flair and here’s Drew McIntyre to chase Orton off, shouting “EVEN HIM???” Medics and Adam Pearce come out to tend to Flair.

Overall Rating: B-. Maybe it’s because things were such a mess last week, but this was WAY better than what they have been doing in recent weeks. Above all else, it felt like they have a series of targets in mind and focused on every single one of them in a row. The show wasn’t all over the place for a change and you can see what they are going for. The closing segment was quite good and the show worked as a whole. There was nothing outstanding and the wrestling wasn’t the best, but there was a focus here and that has been sorely missing from the show over the last few….well probably years. Good stuff.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Humberto Carrillo – Stomp

Angelo Dawkins b. Andrade – Spinebuster

Bianca Belair b. Zelina Vega – KOD

Shelton Benjamin b. Apollo Crews – Rollup

Peyton Royce b. Liv Morgan – Deja Vu

Cedric Alexander/Ricochet/Viking Raiders b. Akira Tozawa/Ninjas – Viking Experience to Ninja

Asuka b. Bayley – Asuka Lock

Randy Orton b. Kevin Owens – RKO

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




AEW Women’s Tag Team Tournament Episode 2: One Of The Worst Shows In Years

IMG Credit: AEW

Women’s Tag Team Tournament Episode 2
Date: August 10, 2020
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Veda Scott

We’re back with presumably the second half of the first round, meaning the tournament is probably going to go another three weeks at most. One of the two matches has been announced and there is a bit of a surprise entrant included. Last week’s show wasn’t quite a smash so hopefully they pick it up a bit this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a quick recap of last week’s first round matches.

Opening sequence.

Big Swole draws her name and gets….someone she knows, whose name isn’t important enough for her to say. Dasha names her Lil Swole. Sure why not.

Leva Bates and Rache Chanel are teaming together.

Quarterfinals: Leva Bates/Rache Chanel vs. Big Swole/Lil Swole

Bates, with Peter Avalon, brings Chanel a book about fashion, much to Chanel’s appreciation. As Veda talks about how great Lil Swole is (And mentions that she is a former Shimmer World Champion. Since I have to do research to find out who these well known wrestlers are, that’s enough to tell me that it’s Nicole Savoy.), she takes Chanel down by the arm to start. Back up and Lil is sent outside, where Big carries her around the ring for the save.

They get back in with Big taking over on Leva, with Lil grabbing the Rings of Saturn. Chanel makes the save by tapping her in the head with a brush and Lil is taken into the corner. Some prancing sets up a kick to Lil’s face but Lil powers out of the corner, allowing the hot tag to Big. Chanel is powerbombed down but Bates spears Big down. Lil loads up a powerbomb with Chanel making a save, though the referee doesn’t notice the count. Instead, Chanel is sent outside and it’s a short Downward Spiral/Natural Selection combination to finish Bates at 8:45.

Rating: D. This really didn’t work, and it wasn’t just that I was trying to figure out who Lil was for the first part of the match. I know that she’s a big deal on the women’s circuit, but there is a pretty big leap between the women’s circuit and here, so it might be a good idea to tell us a little something more. Maybe you can’t say the Savoy name (fair), but don’t act like she is some kind of household name that we should just know on sight. It’s not like Trish Stratus or Lita walked through that door. The match itself was quite the mess, with Chanel being a comedy wrestler and Bates not being a threat to anyone. Just a miss all around.

Ivelisse draws Diamante as her partner.

Madusa pops in and makes Dasha draw, because somehow she didn’t know she was in the tournament. Dasha gets…..Rachael Ellering. At least they say her first name this time around. So to recap, we’ve needed to bring in Cameron and the interviewer to fill out the field? Plus one of the Dark jobbers? All for the likely reason of giving Brandi and Allie a trophy?

Quarterfinals: Rachael Ellering/Dasha Gonzalez vs. Ivelisse/Diamante

Ivelisse elbows Dasha in the face but Dasha is back with an armdrag into a nipup. A front flip into a bad forearm sets up an equally bad dropkick to put Ivelisse into the corner. That means it’s off to Ellering vs. Diamante, with the former taking her down by the arm. There’s a running shoulder to put Diamante down, allowing Rachael to give a rather long pose.

A double suplex drops Diamante again and there’s a cartwheel moonsault from Dasha. Diamante blocks a suplex attempt and brings Ivelisse back in, meaning it’s a Lotus Lock (full nelson with the legs). Some running elbows in the corner set up a Downward Spiral for two on Dasha and Ivelisse hammers away. Ivelisse misses a spinning kick to the head though and the hot tag brings in Ellering to clean house.

Ellering hits the running backsplash for two on Ivelisse, who accidentally knocks Diamante off the apron. A middle rope legdrop gets two on Ivelisse, with Diamante making the save. Diamante pulls Ivelisse out of the way of a splash in the corner, followed by a wheelbarrow Stunner on Dasha. A rather snappy Code Red finishes Dasha at 10:15.

Rating: D-. I can’t believe it but they managed to make the first match look that much better. Dasha isn’t a wrestler so I don’t blame her for this. She has had at least one match on the NXT Florida circuit but even a long time there is nowhere near enough to make you ready for this spot. Diamante isn’t good and Ellering is just coming off of a torn ACL. What were you expecting this to be? Whatever it was, this was probably worse.

The Swoles talk about having chemistry for a long time and use the word swole for almost everything.

Dasha, who just lost, can’t stop smiling because that was something she had wanted to do. Dasha: “I had my first loss in AEW and hopefully it won’t be my last.”

Ivelisse and Diamante say they are a threat.

Overall Rating: F. This was terrible and I can’t think of many other ways to put it. To go with the blunt option, there are not enough women available to AEW to make a tournament like this (which isn’t even that big) work. The women are giving it their all but they are not ready for this spot in this kind of a structure. The company doesn’t have enough women to make this work and what we saw here was painful.

I don’t remember the last time I wanted a show to end more, and that includes the last year plus of Raw. This isn’t on the women for the most part, as they were put in over their heads. I feel sorry for them, but more than that I feel relieved that this thing is only going for two more weeks (in theory at least).

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




205 Live – August 7, 2020: When This Show Makes Me Mad

IMG Credit: WWE

205 Live
Date: August 7, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Drew Gulak, Vic Joseph

We’re back to the cruiserweights and for the first time in a good while, that doesn’t sound like a complete waste of time. Things have been getting a little interesting around here, or at least as interesting as a show regularly featuring Tony Nese and Ever Rise is going to be. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Ever Rise vs. Mikey Spandex/Marquis Carter

Let’s get these goofs out of the way early. Parker armbars Spandex (what a name) to start as Gulak talks about proper fish tank maintenance. Parker misses a charge, allowing Spandex to slam him for one. It’s off to Parker to knock Spandex down and stomp away but he gets in a dropkick for a breather.

Carter comes in for some running forearms and a springboard elbow gets one on Martel. That’s about it for Carter, who gets taken down into a backbreaker/running knee combination as the fans seem to be cheering for Ever Rise. I know these people are paid but is it really worth that much? Anyway the elevated Codebreaker finishes Spandex at 4:15.

Rating: D+. Well that happened, as I guess we are supposed to care about Ever Rise now? I mean, I can’t imagine many people do, but you do need to give them a win every now and then to make sure the important teams beating them gets a little something. The team isn’t so much bad as they are lame, and in a lot of ways that’s a lot worse, as has been the case with them so far.

We see Legado del Fantasma kidnapping Fandango on NXT, and what happened later that night.

Here is Legado del Fantasma for a chat and they carry Fandango out with him. Escobar talks about how they come out here every week and try to explain that they are just better because lucha libre is not a gimmick. Fandango is thrown over the barricade and then inside, with Escobar talking about Breezango playing dress up. They spit in the face of Escobar and the disrespect stops right now. The rest of the team goes after Fandango and cut off an invading Tyler Breeze as well. Escobar says anyone who speaks his name again will face the same future.

Tony Nese vs. Danny Burch

Oney Lorcan is here with Nese. They lock up to start with neither getting anywhere. The threat of the half crab sends Nese bailing to the ropes so Lorcan takes him to the mat and works on the arm instead. Nese’s waistlock is countered into a headlock so Nese rolls over to the ropes again. Back up and Nese starts the dodging, setting up an elbow to the face for two.

The chinlock goes on but Burch fights up and grabs a headlock takeover. That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex for two and it’s off to the front facelock. Burch’s throat is snapped across the top rope and the Lionsault connects, but Burch is already in the ropes. At least he didn’t waste time. Nese stays on the ribs with a bodyscissors before throwing a chinlock in for a bonus.

That’s broken up as well and Burch clotheslines him into the corner. A suplex gives Burch two and Nese pretty easily loses a slugout. Nese kicks him in the face for two of his own, followed by a second to keep Burch down. The 450 misses but here’s Ariya Daivari to rake Lorcan’s eyes. Lorcan is sent into the Plexiglas and seems to bang up his knee, but he sends Burch back to the ring anyway. Burch sends Nese into a variety of things and grabs a hanging DDT for the pin at 10:53.

Rating: C. WHY DOES DAIVARI HAVE TO KEEP COMING BACK TO THIS FREAKING SHOW??? He isn’t interesting now, he wasn’t interesting before and he is never going to be interesting, but for some reason he has one of those job for life deals and keeps coming back despite never being anything that matters in the slightest. Is ANYONE going to be upset if he isn’t on the show and someone else can get his spot? I actually groaned when I saw him show up and that’s one of the worst reactions you can have for any wrestler. WWE seems to need one on every show though, and I guess Daivari is this show’s version.

Overall Rating: D+. Daivari’s appearance alone sucked the life out of this show for me, which is saying a lot on a show featuring Ever Rise in one of the two matches. I’m not big on Nese but somehow he was the second best thing about the show. This was a major downward spiral for the show and I’m almost scared to see where it is going. Just because someone is on the roster doesn’t mean you have to use them, and that is where 205 Live gets confused. Someone pay Daivari to sit at home already and let the show go somewhere. That isn’t going to happen though, as the 205 Live cycle continues.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – August 6, 2020: A Good Match And REALLY?

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: August 6, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

Let the recapping continue as we move towards Summerslam at what somehow feels like a rushed and slow pace at the same time. This week’s TV featured the big ideas of Retribution and Raw Underground, both of which could be quite interesting if WWE can pull off a miracle. I’m not sure how they are going to go in short form, but WWE has done weirder things. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Humberto Carrillo vs. Arturo Ruas

Ruas has been on NXT before and has spent a good deal of time in Evolve. Carrillo ducks a big kick to the head to start and they grapple into the corner. An armbar takes Carrillo down but he spins out of a wristlock without much effort. A crossbody sends Ruas into the corner for a running dropkick to the floor. Ruas is back inside before the dive though and that means a jumping knee to the face back inside. Back in and Ruas kicks away before grabbing the quickly broken chinlock. An armbar works a bit better but Ruas misses a running knee in the corner. The high crossbody gives Carrillo two and it’s a torture rack into a faceplant for the pin on Ruas at 5:27.

Rating: C-. Yeah it’s still Carrillo, but it is nice to see someone fresh in there with him. WWE has this many people in and around Orlando so bring them onto the show and spice things up a little bit. It isn’t a great match or anything, but at least they did something fresh for a change.

From Smackdown.

We go to the Firefly Fun House where Bray Wyatt has a snorkel because he was looking for Braun Strowman. Though maybe the alligators have already eaten Braun. All Bray ever wanted to do was save Braun but now HE is awake and HE wants something Braun has. Until HE gets it, none of you are safe. Let him in.

From Smackdown again.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Nikki Cross

Bayley is defending and Sasha Banks and Alexa Bliss are the seconds. Cross starts fast by knocking Bayley around and hitting a monkey flip. The Purge is broken up so Nikki slams her head first into the mat over and over. Bayley is back with a shot in the ropes but Nikki sends her outside in a crash as we take a break. We come back with Bayley running Nikki over and sending her into the buckle. A belly to back suplex drops Nikki on her head for two but a shot to the throat gets her out of trouble.

There’s a tornado DDT for two on Bayley and a reverse DDT onto the apron has her in more trouble. Back in and Nikki gets two off a Regal Cutter but Bayley snaps her throat first across the rope. Bayley goes over to the announcers’ table to mock Nikki’s dance for reasons of general cockiness, allowing Nikki to take her down by the leg. A dropkick through the ropes takes Sasha down and they fight over some rollups for two each. Bayley pops back up and hits the bulldog driver to retain at 10:30.

Rating: C+. They were just starting to cook and then Bayley finished her in a hurry to retain. It didn’t last long but they had me believing they might pull the surprise for a bit. That’s hard to do given how dominant Bayley has been but they need to have someone give her a real challenge because you can only do these same things over and over so many times.

Post match Bayley and Banks leave and the copyright comes up but we stay with Bliss trying to help Nikki up. Nikki says no and shoves her down before leaving on her own. Cue the Fiend of all people to kneel next to Bliss and hold out his hand, which she looks at while shaking her head. Fiend Mandible Claws Bliss to end the show. If we have to do this one more time, that’s a different enough way to go to make it more interesting.

Here’s Drew McIntyre for a chat. He talks about Randy Orton has spent twenty years preying on vulnerability and then coming after McIntyre last week after an Extreme Rules match. McIntyre should have seen it coming and that’s on him. He has gotten in trouble for being lazy before and that was why Vince McMahon fired him. Orton has had everything handed to him over the years though and has gotten in so much trouble over the years that he should have been fired a long time ago.

Cue Orton with Ric Flair to say he wants to be here because he enjoys being here. He enjoys hitting RKOs and punting heads. Orton likes Drew’s spirit, which is going to make beating him at Summerslam all the sweeter. Reigns says Orton should have been fired years ago and he’s right. Orton should have been fired multiple times but Drew was the one who was fired. That’s because Orton was more valuable to this company than Drew ever could be. He has gotten chance after chance because he is the chosen one, then now and forever.

Drew has been quoting legends, but what has he done that makes him that great. McIntyre talks about Undertaker saying he pulled Orton up to his level in the Last Ride, but when has Orton ever done that? How about ten years ago? When Drew’s career was falling down around him and he was self destructing, a kind word from someone like Orton could have changed everything.

Drew looks at Orton and sees a selfish jerk, so at Summerslam it’s time to cash in some receipts both for himself and all the legends that Orton has kicked in the head. This time though, Orton will see it coming. This was good stuff and the kind of thing that can build up a match that makes all the sense in the world on paper.

Riddick Moss vs. Mustafa Ali

Moss throws him down with straight power to start and then does it again for a bonus. Ali’s chop has no effect and a dropkick doesn’t do much better. Another hard shot to the face gives Moss an early two and we hit the chinlock. We take a break and come back with Moss being pulled off the top but taking out Ali’s knee in a smart move.

Moss stomps away in the corner and a leglock sends Ali to the ropes. That’s fine with Moss, who wraps the knee around the post. A snap suplex gets a very delayed two and we hit the half crab. That’s broken up and Ali kicks his way out of the corner, setting up the rolling X Factor for two. The tornado DDT gets the same but the 450 misses. Moss’ neckbreaker is good for the pin at 11:06.

Rating: C+. That’s one of the best Main Event matches I can remember in a long time and I can’t say I’m surprised. First of all, you have Ali, who has shown that he can go with almost anyone on the main roster, but is stuck here for some reason. Then you have Moss, who has been treated like a big deal around here but can’t get on the main roster shows to save his life. Wouldn’t you think he’s at least worth a shot at this point? Good match here though, especially for where they are.

We look at Sonya Deville jumping Mandy Rose and cutting her hair.

From Raw.

We look back at Seth Rollins destroying Rey Mysterio and tormenting his family.

Here are Seth Rollins and Murphy so Seth can make a statement, but first he wants to ask Tom Phillips if he is an unbiased journalist. What was he doing last week when Dominic was attacking Seth with a kendo stick? Rollins starts shouting about Phillips cheering him on and inciting his rage. It’s the bias (oh it’s time to get topical) that causes these problems, so Murphy is going to take care of Phillips. Samoa Joe stands up and says that isn’t happening because he was laughing harder than anyone last week.

Rollins says Joe doesn’t want to do this but Joe says he does. Rollins and Murphy roll inside and tell Joe to come join them. Joe takes off the coat and we go to a break. Back with Joe still not in the ring but here’s Dominic with a kendo stick to lay out Murphy and Rollins. Dominic hits a big dive off the top to take both of them down and the two run off. Rollins grabs the mic and says the match is on for Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C-. What a confusing show. There was no mention of either Raw Underground or Retribution, but we have time for the Mandy vs. Sonya deal and DOMINICK??? For the life of me I don’t get why we are supposed to care about him so much but WWE is going to make sure that he is there no matter what. Even if the guy winds up being fine, I’m not sure how he can warrant this much attention so early. Anyway, Moss vs. Ali was good, but the rest of the show was your usual fare, which you can take or leave.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Ring Of Honor TV – August 5, 2020 (Best Of Joe Hendry): I Believe In Best Of Shows

IMG Credit: Ring of Honor Wrestling

Ring of Honor
Date: August 5, 2020

We’re on to Joe Hendry as the possible options continue to dwindle around here. Hendry is someone who seems to have all of the potential in the world and the singing is a great deal, but I’m not sure he warrants an episode all to himself. Then again these things have a pretty good track record. Let’s get to it.

Naturally Hendry handles the opening, with his own music video.

Hendry talks about everything that he has been doing since the pandemic started. This includes rapping about his team with Dalton Castle and communicating with him through green screen. They have since fallen out (They have?) but let’s go back to a better time. From ROH TV, February 5, 2020.

Master and Machine vs. Dalton Castle/Joe Hendry

Hendry takes Master down with an early wristlock but it’s back up so they both miss some kicks to the head. Master’s hurricanrana works well enough but he has to slip out of a fall away slam to send us to a break. Back with Castle vs. Machine with Castle wrestling him down and scoring with a suplex.

The chinlock doesn’t last long but Machine has to get out of a Bang A Rang attempt. Master puts him down and belly to back suplexes Master into a moonsault. A double stomp into an elbow gets two on Castle but it’s off to Hendry in a hurry. Hendry’s delayed vertical suplex connects for two and it’s already back to Castle for a chinlock. Make that a chinlock from Hendry, followed by a suplex from Castle.

Master gets in a kick to the head though and it’s Machine coming back in to pick up the pace. Castle and Hendry get beaten up, including a spinebuster to Castle and a spear to Hendry. The Skywalker Elbow gets two on Hendry but he’s right back up with a double fall away slam. Everything breaks down and Master is shoved into a Codebreaker, setting up the reverse Sling Blade for the pin at 10:45.

Rating: C+. This worked better than I was expecting as Master and Machine (not Master and Commander as I keep wanting to put) are a rather nice treat that I wasn’t expecting. Castle and Hendry are getting better but it took so long to get there that it doesn’t feel like it’s worth the time.

Hendry talks about how he has been around Ring of Honor for about a year, and this is the match that probably got him signed.

From Honor Reunited: London 2018.

Joe Hendry vs. Jonathan Gresham

Gresham’s full nelson is broken up in a hurry and it’s an early standoff. More grappling goes to another standoff and Gresham asks for some more grappling as the match stops again. Hendry grabs his own full nelson and has to go to the ropes for the break this time, which gets some questionable applause. They fight over wrist control with Hendry getting the better of things as Gresham can’t quite escape. Gresham finally flips him away and we get another standoff, though this one includes a handshake.

Hendry is taken into the ropes and Gresham gives him a little pat on the face, which seems a bit cruel. Gresham slips out of a hold on the mat and offers a handshake but Gresham isn’t sure as we take a break. Back with Hendry offering a hammerlock and then spinning Gresham to the floor for the escape. Gresham seems to know he was shown up and heads back inside, only to get kicked to the floor again. Back in again and Gresham takes the leg again, but this time he avoids getting kicked to the floor.

Hendry grabs a waistlock and wrestles him to the floor as frustration begins to set in. Gresham heads inside again and takes Hendry down twice in a row, setting up a crisscross. A shoulder puts Gresham down and a jumping knee to the face does it again, earning Hendry some applause. They fight over a small package and roll around the ring, followed by a pinfall reversal sequence. Gresham gets caught with an uppercut but comes back with a standing springboard moonsault. An Oklahoma roll finishes Hendry at 9:24.

Rating: C+. This was better than a lot of these evenly matches matches as they gave you a sense that it wasn’t planned. So often they feel like a recital but that wasn’t quite the same case here. Of course they had obviously planned sequences, but I liked it well enough to keep me interested and not have my eyes rolling, so well done for something like this.

Here’s a commercial for a Hendry CD collection, with songs all about wearing masks in the pandemic.

Hendry wraps it up with maybe his favorite ROH match. From Honor United 2019.

TV Title: Shane Taylor vs. Joe Hendry

Taylor is defending and they both have their entourages with them, though it’s one on one when we get ready. During the referee’s instructions, Shane calls him a ballerina and they lock up against the ropes. Hendry takes him into the corner for a shove off as Castle isn’t all that impressed so far on commentary. Taylor spins out of a wristlock so Hendry does it a little bit better, which doesn’t mean much when you consider Hendry’s much smaller size.

A big shoulder drops Hendry and we take a break. Back with Hendry shouldering him to the floor but Taylor pulls him down with a Tower of London. The big leg on the apron makes it even worse and for some reason Hendry tries a suplex back inside. This goes as well as you would expect so Taylor chinlocks some sense into him. Back up and Hendry gets sent outside for a whip into the barricade. We take another break and come back with Hendry sending him into the barricade to even things up again.

Taylor is sent into the barricade a few more times but comes back with a shot to the face for two more. Hendry finally does hit that suplex and starts striking away, setting up a Codebreaker for another two. That means another slugout until Shane hits a heck of a package piledriver for a great near fall. A middle rope splash gets a slightly less great two but Hendry is up with the fall away slam into the ankle lock. Hendry even sits down with it before being kicked away. Taylor slips out of a slam though Greetings From 216 retains the title at 15:59.

Rating: C+. Hendry is someone who should be a star but it isn’t clicking for some reason. Maybe it’s the fall away slam finisher but the whole package isn’t coming together. That being said, it’s not like he is going to be pushed as anything more than a midcarder around here anyway. Just get things together so we can see what all he can do.

Hendry thanks us for watching because this is the best wrestling in the world. They can’t wait to get back in front of the fans so keep checking them out.

Overall Rating: C+. I keep really wanting to like Hendry as he has a great look and can do some good stuff in the ring, but it doesn’t feel like he is the star they want him to be. Granted having a fall away slam for a finisher probably has a lot to do with that. He could be a nice addition around here though and that’s what they seem to be doing with him, so keep doing this and they’ll be fine.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2006 (2013 Redo): Questionably Stacked

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, John Bradshaw Layfield

The opening video is about DX taking over the company with their sophomoric jokes. The other matches get some lip service as well.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo puts him on the top rope and tries to powerbomb Rey to the floor but Rey fights out to avoid death. They facejam each other down to the mat and both guys are in trouble. Back up and Rey gets two off a springboard cross body. A hard kick to the head gets the same for Rey before he hurricanranas Chavo into the 619. The seated senton misses and Mysterio hurricanranas both guys out to the floor.

ECW Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Sabu finally knocks him through the table off a springboard from the chair but Show pops up and electric chairs Sabu down. A Vader Bomb crushes Sabu and Show brings in two sets of steps. He bridges a table across them but his chokeslam is countered into a DDT through the table. Sabu sets up another table but charges into a chokeslam through it for the pin.

Layla won the Diva Search earlier this week.

We recap Hogan vs. Orton. Hogan is a legend, Orton is the legend killer, I think you can do the math. There was a stupid bit with Orton hitting on Brooke thrown in which went nowhere.

Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan

We look at a big party yesterday which is exactly what you would think it was. This was also the announcement for WWE 24/7, which was nowhere near as cool as it sounded.

Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. King Booker

Post match Batista “destroys” Booker, which translates to him not being able to get him up for a Batista Bomb until Booker clearly pulls himself up. Again, this feud went on for three more months.

Jeff Hardy is coming back tomorrow. Why bother announcing it when you can have a big surprise like that?

D-Generation X vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon

Vince and Shane head back to the entrance and send out the Spirit Squad as the first line of defense. Superkicks, backdrops and Pedigrees abound, getting rid of the Raw Tag Champions (the cheerleaders) in less than fifteen seconds. DX beat the Spirit Squad about five times in this whole thing but never won the tag titles. I never quite got why.

Wrestlemania 23 is in Detroit.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

We hit the chinlock for a good while until Cena breaks the hold with pure power. Cena hits a knee to the chest but walks into a big boot for two. Edge goes up top and fights off Cena so he can hit a top rope clothesline for two. Off to a camel clutch but Cena again powers out of it. Both guys are down so Lita sends in a chair. Edge picks it up before throwing it down out of fear in a cute bit. Cena initiates his finishing sequence but the FU is countered into the Impaler for two.

Edge goes up again but has to escape the FU off the ropes into an electric chair but Cena gets two off a victory roll. A middle rope cross body is rolled through into the FU but a Lita distraction makes Cena drop Edge. The champion is sent into his chick and Cena gets a close two off a rollup. A double clothesline puts both guys down until Edge rolls over for two.

Ratings Comparison

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Big Show vs. Sabu

Original: C

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: D

Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair

Original: B-

Redo: B

Batista vs. King Booker

Original: D

Redo: D

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. D-Generation X

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Edge vs. John Cena

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: C

Other than Hogan, not a lot changes here. This show pretty much is what it is.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/09/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2006-hogan-and-dx-are-in-charge-are-we-in-1998/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2006 (Original): The Odd Ball

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, JBL

So a few things have happened since last year, but a lot of the show is the same. DX is back, feuding with the McMahons, Edge has risen to prominence and is the WWE Champion, and Booker is now a British guy. Your main events are Booker vs. Batista and Cena vs. Edge, along with the DX vs. McMahon tag match. The other major difference is the return of ECW, which as usual has one match. This is far different than the ECW you see today, as the title match is Big Show vs. Sabu.

Hogan is here again, this time against Orton, while Flair and Foley are having an I Quit match, which would be Foley’s last big angle as he would leave for awhile very shortly after this, returning in about 9 months for a few appearances here and there before becoming commentator for about a month before leaving for TNA. That’s enough recap from me, so let’s do this. Oh one last thing. Angle would be released 5 days after this show and would debut for TNA about 5 weeks after this.

The opening video is generic to say the least. It’s just promos and clips from the three major feuds. I’m really disappointed in this.

The 6 announcers welcome us to the show which takes a few minutes. Lawler says that he’s the WWE’s original party animal which just amuses me.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Remember how I said I was disappointed? That’s nothing compared to this. This contest is being held because these two have been fighting over who was closer to Eddie. This is nothing short of disgusting to me. Eddie passed away less than a year ago, and this isn’t even the first angle that was because of him. I get that he was a huge star, but you don’t need to use him to further storylines.

Chavo says that Rey is living off of Eddie’s legacy, which in reality he likely was as he got the world title at Mania, but that’s a different argument for a different time. They show video packages of both men’s relationships with Eddie as I feel like I’m in 5th grade. Seriously, this is like two 8 year old girls arguing over who someone’s real best friend is. However, the other friend just happens to be dead. See? No matter how you say that it’s not respectful or paying tribute. IT’S CREEPY.

Also, the whole Dominick storyline is completely omitted. In other words, thanks to the magic of WWE, the whole angle about Eddie trying to destroy Rey’s family and steal his son has been completely forgiven. And people wonder why WWE is criticized so much. Apparently Chavo is retired or something but this is a one night only event. If only that were true. As much as I can’t stand JBL in the ring, he’s pretty good on commentary.

It’s nice to have him out there as he was a wrestler far more recently than Tazz was. Chavo cost Rey the title. Thanks for mentioning that 3 minutes into the match. JBL makes an Arturo Gatti reference which is just weird to hear at this point. Chavo is complaining that Rey is trying to make a name off of Eddie. Yeah, I don’t need to criticize that. JBL calls Chavo’s comeback the biggest one since the resurrection. Again, don’t even need to make fun of that.

JBL goes on to say that these are two of Smackdown’s best. If this is one night only, wouldn’t that mean he’s not on Smackdown at the moment? Rey is having mask issues so we take a short break. Ok I like JBL. He’s actually really good at this. They both stand on the top rope and…just kind of jump off. Yeah that spot looked really stupid. Bradshaw keeps calling him Shavo which is getting annoying.

Yeah JBL is already getting annoying. If he says “He’s a Guerrero!” one more time I’m going to scream. Eddie was a groomsman at JBL’s wedding? How much do they want to break down the walls between reality and kayfabe? 619 but Chavo avoids the senton and they go to the floor. Vickie, now with about another 50 pounds on her and in full annoying mode heads to the ring and goes after Chavo for no apparent reason, slapping him.

The three amigos get Chavo booed out of the building. Cole calls a hurricanrana a headscisscors. Since Chavo got booed out of the building for the triple suplexes, Rey does them as well as everyone is being booed now. Rey goes up for a frog splash and Vickie tries to stop him, resulting him in him getting crotched. Chavo hits a suplex which is called a brainbuster, leading to the frog splash as Vickie screams to win it. Post match, they still won’t shut up about how it’s about family etc.

Rating: C+. The match was fine, but the rating is hurt a lot as this storyline is just flat out horrid. It’s completely disrespectful, and while it got both of the Guerreros jobs, it just wasn’t needed. There were about a dozen other ways to do this that wouldn’t be disrespectful at all, nor would they have ticked off the crowd. I hated this, but the wrestling was ok I guess. It would have been better if I had watched it muted.

Booker and Sharmell are in the back with Booker still being British, which is oddly a far better gimmick for him. He was completely generic as Booker T, but this is quite memorable. Edge and Lita come in and they argue about who the most powerful couple in wrestling is. That would be Vince and Linda.

This would lead to the triple threat challenge at Cyber Sunday which was all three championships on the line at the same time and was ended by Kevin freaking Federline. They make a bet about their title matches that didn’t mean anything at all in the end.

Ad for the best managers DVD. That’s a lost art in wrestling anymore.

It’s time for the ECW title match. The story is pretty simple: Big Show is ECW Champion and Sabu wants to be. Sabu won a ladder match against Van Dam on ECW to get this match, albeit with help from Show. Styles screams that this was VINTAGE ECW. Is this a running joke that we just never caught on to?

ECW Title: Sabu vs. Big Show

This is extreme rules, and for the ECW WORLD Title. Yes it was called a world title back then. For those of you that haven’t seen Sabu before, consider yourself lucky. He’s the epitome of everything that’s wrong with hardcore wrestling as his skills were limited at best and dangerous at worst. However, he was an extreme icon, so it’s all good. The ECW belt looks like a toy on Show. Within 5 seconds of the bell, Sabu has hit Show 4 times with a chair. That’s a good way of foreshadowing the match.

Show steps on it and crushes the chair which looks cool. This is more or less just Sabu using weapons and Show beating him up. It’s a simple formula but it’s working to an extent. The chair shots sounds SICK. If you think Hardy botches moves, he’s Bret Hart compared to Sabu. It’s table time, as Sabu is the guy that made them famous, far more so than the Dudleys who are more known for them.

Sabu gets him through the table which the more I think about it the more I think that it is nowhere near as great of a spot as it’s built up to be. A Vader Bomb pretty much kills the Arabian. Big Show brings in a table and stairs which is a cheap indy show name if I’ve ever heard one. Show sets up a tiny bridge with a table over two sets of stairs.

Sabu climbs on it and of course it falls over, so he sets it again as Show just looks at him. Naturally, he’s booed for it. Chokeslam through the table ends this, even though Sabu is on the table and therefore his shoulders are technically up, but why am I trying to use logic on a match like this?

Rating: C. It was a hardcore match with good chair shots. What are you really expecting here? It was fine for what it was, but it’s nothing special. Sabu as usual was just flat out horrid and Show didn’t have to do much. It was ok, as long as you don’t take it too seriously.

We see Layla winning the Diva Search. Yeah I don’t care either. In the divas locker room, Layla shows off her horrible acting skills while Trish yells at her for saying she doesn’t belong here. Truer words have never been spoken. Three years have passed and Layla still can’t do crap. Of course, in the end Trish is fine with it and everything is cool. They take her into the shower and spray her down with water. Yeah, it’s stupider than it sounds.

A band called the Teddybears did the theme song. Is there a point to these things that I’m missing?

We get a recap of Hogan vs. Orton, which is billed perfectly as legend vs. legend killer. These Hogan highlight packages are always cool. More or less all this happened for was to get Hogan’s reality show pushed and to promote Brooke. Orton hit on her and Hogan stopped him, resulting in Hogan getting RKOed on a car.

We also get highlights of all the legends that Orton hit with the RKO, which is a decent list I guess. We even got a parody complete with impersonators. More or less, this is Orton replacing Shawn, but lower on the card, as it should be.

Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton

Wow Hogan goes on third? That’s very surprising. Unless I’m overlooking something, this is Hogan’s last match to date in WWE. He appeared once other than this at the 15th anniversary where he fought off Khali, but other than that he’s been gone. You know it’s a good thing Vince is rich. He has to pay a lot of money for roofs. Hogan of course gets the legendary pop that he deserves. Ross of course mentions that Hogan has a bad knee. Hulk Hogan doesn’t get hurt you idiot.

Hogan definitely is looking smaller here, but he’s still muscular. The reaction for Hogan really is awesome. I love the old school merchandise like the towel and shirts. The entrance goes on forever just like the old school ones did. This is always fun and this is no exception. This is a much better reaction than he got last year and I think it’s because they got the formula right: Hogan vs. evil. That was the problem with Shawn.

He was still a face so why would we want to see Hogan beat him up? The fans didn’t buy it so while it worked, it wasn’t great. It’s weird seeing someone being taller than Orton. In a head scratcher, Hogan gets put in a headlock and goes down to one knee in just a few seconds. Everyone goes a bit blind as the headband goes off. They use an overhand wristlock and it looks decent. I’m quite surprised. Other than shoving Orton at the beginning, it’s been all Orton.

Dang it why is it that every time I say that the comeback begins? Hogan gets on the second rope and punches him, which for some reason surprises JR. It’s not like this is a new thing for him. He hits a clothesline with authority, which is another term that’s never made sense. How can a clothesline have authority? Can it give you an infraction while you try to start a resistance? The bias for Hogan and his rule breaking will never cease to amuse me.

In a weird time, they mention that the fans from the old AWA days remember the times when he refused to obey the rules. Why not just go with the time he was a heel in the far more famous WCW? Maybe there’s something to that theory of WWE never mentioning WCW because they know it’s better. Orton finally goes for the knee which is what makes sense all along, as given away by the massive knee braces on both legs.

They finally mention that Hogan was the main event of Summerslam 90, which I’ve long since theorized. Apparently Orton is craving to be loved. Thank you Sigmund Ross. Orton slides under the big boot just like Shawn did last year and hits the picture perfect dropkick. Screw Bob Holly. Orton’s dropkick is perfect. Now here we have something that makes me change my mind about a lot of the criticisms that Hogan gets.

Randy hits the RKO and covers, and Hogan doesn’t kick out. He puts his foot on the rope. That’s very subtle but when you think about it, that’s a huge show of respect to Orton. Of all of the big finishers that Hogan has been hit with over the years, I’ve never seen him not kick out of it with that big power move. He didn’t power out of the RKO. He had to use the weaker kickout. That’s a huge show of support for the young kid and it makes him look dominant.

The thing is they never mentioned it as a big deal, despite it being one of the biggest rubs that Hogan has ever given anyone. Anyway, Orton celebrates because he thinks that he’s beaten the legend himself and maybe he has a right to, but Hogan’s foot didn’t go unnoticed by the referee despite the announcers being completely oblivious to it.

Hogan staggers to his feet and limps around in a circle shaking his head which is a truly sad sight to see in my eyes as he just doesn’t have the physical strength anymore to do it the way he used to. We all know how this is going to go. Hogan circles Orton, shakes a finger in his face, kicks him in the head and after about 15 seconds, drops the leg for the pin.

I love how nonchalant Hogan is after the legdrop, as if to say yeah I know he’s not getting up for a month. Lawler marks out like an 8 year old for this and I love that. If this were anyone else I’d hate it but in this case it’s fine as this is Hulk Hogan. He’s the greatest ever and he should be treated as such. As Hogan celebrates we see a guy with a tattoo of Hogan all over his entire back. That’s either creepy or awesome.

Rating: B. This is exactly what a modern Hogan match is supposed to be. You have a young guy that is kind of proven but not quite and he just can’t beat Hogan despite getting close. Now some of you again might say that Hogan didn’t give Randy the rub here, but on a closer look he did.

That lack of a kickout of the RKO was in reality was huge. It made Orton look like a monster because it was enough to stop the super kickout from Hogan, which no other move has ever done in history. That’s about as big of a rub as you could give.

We see a big party that was held yesterday announcing the debut of 24/7. Kennedy is there, which amuses me.

Foley is in the back and Melina comes up and hugs him. Now this was a very interesting storyline that I wish had been given more time to develop. Flair had run down Foley in his book and Foley did the same. There was a real life feud between these two but they’ve since patched things up. Melina was a real life friend of Foley who was stuck in the middle of this for some reason. They had agreed to an I Quit match here after having a pretty bad one at Vengeance.

Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley

Sweet goodness Lillian is amazing looking. Foley brings in some weapons with him. It’s weird seeing Foley more or less as the heel and Flair as the face. There is legit animosity between these two which always helps things get better. Foley jumps him and it’s on. Running knee to the face in the first ten seconds from Foley. And then he does it again with the garbage can.

Mandible Claw goes on and Flair is down. This is more or less a squash almost but Foley grabs the mic and says make it easy on yourself and say it’s over. Naturally it’s not over and Foley gets barbed wire. On his alternate commentary from his DVD, Foley says he felt he didn’t have aggression here and he felt bad about it. Flair wraps barbed wire around his hand and CHOPS FOLEY. This left a HUGE scar on his chest that he shows on the DVD and it’s awful looking.

Barbed wire board is rammed into the face of Flair and he slides under the ring to blade I think. Oh yeah he’s busted open. The fans want tables. Something I’d like to do here is time how long between that chant starting and the amount of time before they’re introduced. Teasing them like that is a great idea as we have to wait for awhile instead of instant gratification.

Barbed wire board dropped on Flair results in him shouting obscenities to Foley. Foley busts out the tacks as there hasn’t been much of anything from Flair here. Flair is slammed onto the tacks for the second time in about two weeks after Show did it to him on ECW recently. Dang there are a ton of tacks in Flair’s arms.

Time for the barbed wire bat here. Flair is bleeding like crazy at this point. And now Flair sends him into the post and beats his arm with the bat. Foley is apparently wearing a Japanese Cactus Jack t-shirt. BIG bump as Foley is on the apron and Flair gets a running start with the bat and sends Foley to the floor and he bangs his head on the concrete. Cue Melina down to the ring to check on Foley who is out and the referee stops it.

Ok never mind as Flair decides that’s not enough so we’re going to keep going. Flair says he didn’t say I Quit so we keep going. He beats on Foley even more until Melina throws the towel in for him and says he quits. Foley still didn’t say I Quit so I don’t get why Flair would accept that either. Oh ok he didn’t. Foley quits seconds later I think after Flair threatens to hit Melina.

Rating: B-. On Foley’s DVD he does commentary for this match and he says that it wasn’t a very good match despite having a massive scar on his chest from the barb wire spot. He said that he never really took this as far as he could have to make it a truly bloody classic, but he thought it was ok. I would have to disagree with him to an extent though as it was at least decent.

Having Melina play into the equation at the end was a great move, despite her turning on Foley and having him fired less than a week later. I also really like the false ending as it makes you wonder how far they’re going to take this one.

Vince and Shane are in the back with Estrada. They more or less say that Umaga will be backing them up tonight. JBL gets in one of the best secretive lines you’ll ever hear as he calls him Armando Ali Baba Estrada. Back in OVW, Estrada played an Iranian character named Osama. That’s a very nice little inside joke.

Smackdown World Title: Booker T vs. Batista

There’s no buildup here other than Booker is champion and Batista never actually lost the title but had to drop it due to injury. Booker’s wife just does nothing but shout “All hail King Booker!” over and over. JBL’s sucking up is quite humorous. She’s at 11 times already. After 15 of them, we finally get Booker’s entrance. Isn’t that in essence a jobber entrance? He’s already in the ring when his announcement is made. Yep, Booker gets no respect.

Batista gets a solid pop but nothing mind blowing. This was one of three consecutive Smackdown PPV main events involving these two, so you really don’t have to think that hard about why there were jokes about how repetitive these shows were. If I remember right these two had a legit fight backstage at some point and Booker beat up Batista with relative ease.

They botch a spinkick spot but I’m not sure who is to blame. Booker throws the kick but Batista wasn’t there so they had to have him keep spinning. It didn’t look that good. We get a loud and long boring chant as the first 2-3 minutes of this is primarily Booker having Batista in a chinlock. Batista is quite rusty here which is certainly playing a role here. Booker hits him with the scepter on the floor, which means Batista is moving even slower than he was before and that’s saying a lot.

Back in to an arm hold, which is the same thing as a chinlock in essence. The crowd chants she’s got herpes at Sharmell. This is just amusing. Booker gets crotched by missing a kick, so Batista, ever the strategist and in ring general, picks him up and drops him the same way over another rope. What’s the point of that? Couldn’t he do something more original than that?

Booker hits a missile dropkick which used to be his finishing move in WCW, yet here is just a run of the mill move and the same thing happens with the Book End. JBL makes a bowling analogy which makes me shake my head. Batista hits a jackhammer which Booker pops up from. I love how neither of these guys have an original move to save their life.

Batista hits a bad full nelson slam to set up the power bomb. Sharmell runs in and slaps Batista for the DQ. Yes that’s actually the finish they went with. Post match Batista beats up Booker and BADLY botches the Batista Bomb. He barely got him up and it looked like he was trying to use it on Khali.

Rating: D. For the second year in a row Batista has the worst match of the night. It was barely over 10 minutes long, it was about 4 and a half minutes of rest holds, and the finish was completely stupid. Batista botches so much out there that it was just horrid. If you want to know where the stigma of Batista sucks comes from, I present to you Exhibit A. This was just flat out awful all around and felt like it belonged on Smackdown.

Jeff Hardy is coming to Raw.

DX is talking to someone who we can’t see and they tell him that Vince said Umaga is the biggest monster in the company.

Recap of DX vs. the McMahons and the feud that Satan is afraid of. This feud went on ALL summer and produced only a handful of decently funny moments. It was way too long and was stupid, primarily as it was DX vs. the Spirit Squad, who were tag champions at the time.

Despite beating them about 5 times, DX never won the tag titles. Why that’s the case is beyond me. It might be because they couldn’t have two major stars as champions. That couldn’t happen. We need our male cheerleaders blast it!

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. DX

In case you’ve forgotten it, Shawn made his Summerslam debut in a 6 man tag in 1989. Just thought I’d remind you because JR has only said it at the last three Summerslams. We get the traditionally way too long DX intro. Good night Lillian looks great. HHH says that we need to get ready to suck it. Shawn says if you’re not down with that, they’re going to tell you to suck it. Well I’m glad we’ve got so many choices to pick from.

To say JR doesn’t like Vince is an understatement. Apparently one day Vince will run a hostile takeover of the afterlife. Spirit Squad runs out and uses their trampoline to come in. Two backdrops, a toss over the ropes, Sweet Chin Music and a Pedigree later they’re gone and HHH has a new sweatband. Finlay, Regal and Kennedy run out to beat on DX. The McMahons haven’t even left the stage yet in case you were wondering.

While the club from Finlay would usually drop Khali, since it’s used on DX, it has little effect at all. Big Show is here now and as they try to fight him, we finally have some logic as the other EIGHT GUYS that DX beat up finally wake up and help out, so it’s 9 on 2 here with the McMahons still to come. See, this is the first time ever that I can recall where Vince finally had a brain and realized he owned an army of guys to beat up whomever he was feuding with at the time.

He’d always send one at a time. You own the company Vince. Send out 10 guys at once or something to beat the other dude up. See how effective it can be? I really feel sorry for Styles and Tazz as they’ve been sitting there all night doing nothing after calling a single match. That’s just stupid. Why not have them sit up near the entrance so they can at least go sit in the back after their match? HHH goes through the ECW table as Vince and Shane finally are in the ring.

JR is really getting annoying with this running Vince down. We finally have a bell. It’s Vince against Shawn to start. Ross calls the heels the money maniacs. That’s like the main event of Summerslam 88 from my nightmares. HHH is still on the floor from the chokeslam through the table. HHH tries to get up but Shane hits a baseball slide to knock him onto JR and King. Ross flips HHH over as he’s ticked off about being covered by a big sweaty man.

The way it looked was just quite funny. Demolition Decapitator or whatever that move was called lands on Shawn. The McMahons hit a Hart Attack which is just appropriate being used on HBK. This is followed up by a Doomsday Device. This is actually kind of cool. Of course HBK kicks out though and this isn’t even surprising to the announcers. You have to love the power of kayfabe don’t you? Shawn finally gets a tag and HHH looks perfectly fresh.

Even Hulk Hogan thinks a comeback like this is stupid. JR says it’s adrenaline. I say it’s nonsense. As if 9 run ins weren’t enough, we make it a perfect ten as Umaga comes out. Oh wait it’s 11 since Estrada is with him. We now have 15 people in this match, not counting the referee and 4 announcers, all of which have been involved in this match. Counting Lillian, that’s 21 people that have been at ringside that we know the names of and have been involved in this match somehow.

Anyone else think that’s a lot? It turns out that the person DX was talking to was Kane who chases Umaga off to start their feud which, shockingly enough, Kane jobbed in. Shane sets up for Coast to Coast but Shawn…knees him in the leg I guess, to stop it. Of course it’s called Sweet Chin Music. It’s probably good that he did that as Shane would have been about a foot short. Vince takes both finishers to end this mess.

The recaps and celebration goes on for about two and a half minutes just to make sure we know that this was really a huge win for our triumphant heroes. Somewhere around JR’s 8th sports analogy for how amazing DX’s win is, the faces are finally about to leave the arena. Oh wait, we have MORE replays for you. To begin with, they set for their double pose but I think Shawn’s elbow is hurt as he can’t do the double bicep. He was holding it earlier after going ove the top rope with Shane.

They do a very good job of changing the camera angle for the Shane kick as it’s from behind Shawn now and therefore looks like he actually got the kick. That’s very smart and well done so points for that. Some big fat guy comes out about a foot and Shawn sort of acknowledges him, which I’d assume is someone saying to wrap this up as it’s over. I don’t think he was supposed to be on camera.

Rating: C-. This was a very hard one to grade as it’s just a mess. With more than ten people running in that aren’t involved in the match at all, it’s a hard one to grade. However, I’ll give them credit for FINALLY getting the idea behind Vince as the evil owner right. However, at the end of the day, there was too much going on here for it to be taken seriously. The flaw with this feud is simple: DX are former world champions, and Vince and Shane are businessmen.

There’s no reason to believe that the McMahons would have a chance at all here. Granted they got the theory correct by adding in a lot of people that know what they’re doing to make the feud more interesting. It was better than I’m making it sound, but it wasn’t great.

Kane actually helped out a lot here as he took away some of the ridiculous odds for DX. JR needs to shut up though, as for about 20 minutes he did nothing but talk about how great DX was and how evil the McMahons were. It’s one thing to mention it a few times, but he must have cracked the 20s in times he complained about it. It was completely annoying and WAY overdone.

Wrestlemania 23 is in Detroit.

Time for the final recap of the night as we look at Cena vs. Edge. They tried as hard as they could to make this an epic feud and they got as close as possible without actually getting there. Edge won MITB in 2005 and shocked the world by stealing the title in January after an Elimination Chamber win by Cena. I remember watching that match and texting a former friend of mine that was a diehard Cena mark. I told her the next day that Cena lost the title to Edge and she almost fell over.

The reaction was great. Cena got the title back soon enough but Edge won it from RVD on Raw in July. Edge beat up Cena’s father 6 days prior to this, and Cena is the hometown boy here. We cut to the theme song of the show to get more clips from this feud, including the live sex celebration that as I’ve said a dozen times, was nothing special. It truly wasn’t. It was them moving around under a blanket and nothing more. Big freaking deal.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

Apparently if Edge gets disqualified he loses the title. Cena gets a VERY mixed reaction. The main selling point here is Cena’s father, which makes a lot of sense actually. Lita needs to freaking cut her bangs. You have a hot face. Show it off. She’s Women’s Champion here which was her final reign I believe. Correction it’s her next to last reign as she would lose to Trish next month in Toronto so Trish could retire as champion.

Lita was gone in November, leaving the whole division completely destroyed, the issues of which are still being felt to this day. This is more or less standard stuff with Edge getting close to a bunch of count out wins. On one of these, Edge knocks Cena to the floor and Cena’s eyes are just hilarious. They’re bugged out all over the place as he looks like he just remembered that Christmas is tomorrow or some other cliché from a bad movie.

For some reason I have My Immortal by Evanescence stuck in my head. As you can tell, this match isn’t holding my attention that well. Fans are solidly behind Edge it would seem. You have to love that in Cena’s hometown he’s still not popular. This was the era that Cena was beginning to be truly despised by a lot of fans in, as he was just constantly shoved down our throats, and it would only get worse as the year long title reign was coming.

However, I think those criticisms are unfair for one simple reason: who else was the title going to go on? HHH would be injured in just a few months, HBK lost to Cena at Mania before feuding with Orton and would leave for knee surgery (which had to be legit. It’s an HBK knee injury after all), and Cena was feuding with Edge right here. In short, who was there left to put the belt on, Umaga? See what I mean? There were no other choices other than for Cena to hold the title.

We get a Cena chant that is a lot stronger than I think it actually was if that makes sense. Cena starts his huge comeback of all his standard stuff, complete with an STFU. Lita sets up with the belt to hit Cena but Edge says no as it would cost him the title. She slips him some brass knucks after he makes the ropes though. FU is countered and Edge nails him in the back of the head with the brass which sounds awesome to end it and the show.

Rating: C+. This was fine, but just fine. It’s nothing epic at all despite what the announcers would like you to believe. There really wasn’t a solid main event this year and it showed bad. This would probably be the best choice for it though, as there’s not a lot that would have topped this.

Either way, the match was just ok, but it felt like the title should have changed here. It would change the next month in Toronto as Cena was booed out of the building, so why wait? Why not have Cena get the big win here in his own hometown? Either way, this was ok but nothing great.

Overall Rating: C+. This show is the epitome of slightly above average. Everything on it is just ok. There isn’t a big moment or a big match that makes it jump off the page at you, as Flair and Foley or Cena/Edge is probably the match of the night by pure default. It’s an ok show and watchable, but it’s nothing great at all.

DX vs. McMahons was ok, but just ok. That’s the only thing I can think of to describe any of the matches on here: ok, but just ok. It’s nothing special at all and because of that, it’s right in the middle of recommended and not recommended. Some might like it but others will be bored out of their minds.




Impact Wrestling – August 4, 2020: Two For One

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: August 4, 2020
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Madison Rayne, Josh Matthews

Things got turned around in a big way last week with the premiere of Wrestle House, which became the major focal point of the show. That may or may not be to your liking, but there were enough good moments that made me willing to try another show built around it. Other than that, we have the continuing adventured of Eddie Edwards as World Champion. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

TNA World Title: Heath vs. Moose

Moose is defending. Moose powers him into the corner to start but Heath comes out slugging away. They head outside as Josh hypes up Heath’s WWE career, though he doesn’t think much of the 24/7 Title. Then why mention it if you’re trying to build him up? Heath fights back on the floor and sends Moose into the barricade before taking it inside again. A hot shot drops Heath again and the choking begins.

Heath gets in a few right hands until Moose dropkicks his head off for two. There’s a pump kick to Moose and more right hands but Heath blocks a kick to the face. The comeback is on with some forearms and a side kick for two. No Jackhammer Needed only hits the buckle but the ref gets bumped. The Wake Up Call (Zig Zag) connects but Heath has to check on the referee. That means a low blow into a rollup with tights can finish Heath at 8:55.

Rating: D+. They were in a bad spot here as Heath was only going to win on some kind of a fluke at best and that wasn’t likely when you have EC3 waiting in the wings for Moose. Heath is fine for a midcard guy and it doesn’t seem like they are going to be pushing him as anything but that, which is a nice relief. Not the worst or anything, but there was no drama and it was mostly a squash anyway. Also, they hyped up the Wake Up Call as Heath’s signature move. I don’t think I can remember him using it before.

Show preview.

Willie Mack doesn’t like what Eric Young did to Rich Swann and doesn’t know what Rich’s big announcement is tonight. He’ll be there for Rich though.

EC3 talks about being punished by everyone from his employers to himself and now he needs to reset things. He’s coming for the TNA World Title so he can burn it to the ground.

Jimmy Jacobs brings out the Motor City Machine Guns for a chat. Shelley talks about the effort that they have put in over the years, but now they are back to show they can do it again. That includes Sabin coming back after his third torn ACL. The two of them were training to get Sabin back in the ring and then they realized that they still had the magic in the ring. They talk about the current teams in the company including the North, who come out to cut them off.

Alexander isn’t happy with the Guns getting this chance to tell their story after the North had more than a year as champions but never got that opportunity. Page freaks out over the idea that the Guns beat them, because the Guns didn’t beat the real North. The Guns laugh it off because the North sounds like they were going to die as champions. They’ll give them their rematch right now, but the North would rather wait for Emergence. As they should, since the Guns are apparently cheaters who would fight when the North is in street clothes.

Kimber Lee comes in to see Deonna Purrazzo after seeing Jordynne Grace take Purrazzo out. Lee offers to take care of Grace for a shot at the title. Deal.

And now, Wrestle House, complete with intro sequence. Taya Valkyrie has everyone come into the living room and says it’s time to deal with the hygiene issues, including the horrible BO around here. Johnny Swinger: “Bob Orton is here? Sweet!” That’s not what Taya has in mind, and hands out some personal grooming kits.

Kylie Rae wants to know when they are getting back to the Impact Zone because she is #1 contender. That goes nowhere so Alisha Edwards teaches Rosemary how to seduce a man. Swinger says he isn’t hard to get, but Alisha says not only is she married, but Swinger couldn’t handle her. Swinger knows he can handle both of them. Cue Tommy Dreamer and it’s MATCH TIME!

Johnny Swinger vs. Alisha Edwards/Susie

Cody Deaner is referee and Alisha shouts that she is intense. Swinger hits the double bicep pose and asks if they have ever seen a set like these. That earns him a double legsweep, but he thought he was supposed to sweep them off their feet. Now Swinger wants to hook up so the beatdown is on, including another double legsweep. The women make a wish (Swinger: “Stretch me! Like Sherri Martel!”) and Swinger doesn’t seem pleased. A double splash finishes Swinger at 1:48.

Back in the house, Kylie Rae introduces herself to John E. Bravo (again). Kylie was talking to Rosemary and heard that they can’t leave until Bravo, ahem, takes the hint. Bravo will do that when he is ready, but Kylie seems impatient.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Sami Callihan wins the World Title from Brian Cage on Impact, October 29, 2019.

The Good Brothers find their car door open and their beers poured out. Cops come up and say that looks like an open container in the car. Ace Austin and Madman Fulton comes up to laugh so Gallows grabs him by the throat. Gallows is arrested.

Brian Myers is coming soon.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Eddie Edwards vs. Sami Callihan

Eddie is defending….or at least he would be if Rob Van Dam didn’t jump Sami on the stage as Katie Forbes bounces. Sami gets up and heads to the ring anyway, where he slaps Eddie to say he’s ready to go. Eddie hits a tiger driver in the first five seconds for a near fall and drops some knees to the head. Josh goes over the history between these two and asks if Madison had a rival like this. Madison: “Probably.”

Sami sends him outside for a hard suicide dive into the barricade and sends Eddie back inside. That’s fine with Eddie, who hits his own suicide dive. They go to the apron with Sami raking the eyes and hitting a quick piledriver, only to realize that he has to throw Eddie back inside. Sami sends him into the barricade instead of into the ring, setting up the running chop. Back in and Sami gets two off a running elbow and we hit the chinlock. Eddie fights up and hits a clothesline and they’re both down again.

Some chops in the corner set up Eddie’s Blue Thunder Bomb for two but Sami is right back up with a brainbuster for the same. Sami’s running forearm gets two more so Eddie forearms him right back. The tiger driver gets two on Sami, who pops back up with a piledriver for two with Eddie’s foot making the rope. Sami grabs a chair for some illogical reason but walks into the Boston Knee Party. Another into the back of the head retains the title at 11:54.

Rating: C+. This was a fine enough match and the two of them have always worked well together. I’m not entirely crazy about the World Title being defended every week, but it is far too early to write off something like this. If nothing else, Eddie is one of the most consistent people in all of the promotion and can pull it off.

Back to Wrestle House, where Bravo walks away from a distressed Kylie. Taya and Rosemary ask Kylie where he went but Bravo has left. Match time!

Rosemary vs. Kylie Rae

Taya is referee and distracts Kylie so Rosemary can jump her. Someone at ringside: “RING PSYCHOLOGY!” Kylie reverses into a headlock, which is reversed into a headscissors. Rosemary’s legs are tied up and she can’t slap Kylie, causing her to ask what sorcery is this. Rosemary insists that Kylie is a liar and tries to jump her but has to settle with sending Kylie face first into the mat instead.

A missed charge in the corner lets Kylie hit an uppercut and Taya counts a very slow two. Back up and Rosemary hits a spear for a rather fast two. Some of the other wrestlers cheer for Rosemary though, allowing Kylie to hit a superkick for the very slow three at 4:26, much to Taya’s annoyance.

Rating: D+. Well you knew they weren’t going to have Kylie lose to anyone while she is still #1 contender. Taya and Rosemary as the oddball friends is still an interesting idea, though Kylie is someone who can be a star in the division for a good while. Not a great match, but Kylie getting a come from behind win is a good idea.

Post match Bravo checks on Rosemary while Kylie celebrates. Bravo knows what is going on and likes Rosemary a lot, with Rosemary suggesting that Taya doesn’t have to know everything. Taya comes over to yell at Bravo and sends him away. Rosemary: “As long as it takes.”

Back in the arena, Anderson is trying to get Gallows out of jail. Ace Austin comes up and gets popped in the jaw, so here’s Madman Fulton to jump Anderson from behind.

Hernandez recruits Reno Scum to get his money back from Rhino. Why is this still going?

Chris Bey/Rohit Raju vs. TJP/Fallah Bahh

TJP takes Bey down by the arm to start and they fight over wrist control, as so many people do these days. Back up and they run the ropes, with TJP grabbing the ropes to annoy Bey. It’s off to Raju, but not before Bey gets taken down by the arm. Bahh comes in and cleans house as we take a break.

We come back with Raju breaking up a double splash and Bey taking TJP down for two. Raju’s low superkick gets two on TJP and there’s a running knee to the face for the same. Bey grabs the double arm kick but TJP kicks his way to freedom. A tornado DDT plants Bey and the hot tag brings in Bahh to clean house. Raju knees Bahh in the face and everything breaks down. TJP suplexes Bey down a few times but Bahh is sent outside. Bey loads up a springboard cutter but gets pulled into TJP’s cross armbreaker for the tap at 10:49.

Rating: C. This was all about setting up the likely title shot and based on that, mission accomplished. There wasn’t much of a spark though as it felt like a means to an end for the most part. I like Bey quite a bit and having Raju as a lackey is a step up from Swinger….I think. Maybe.

Preview for next week.

Here’s Rich Swann on crutches for a major announcement. Swann talks about how far he came through hard work and dedication. He became a professional wrestler and proved the doubters wrong. Then in January, he destroyed his ankle and leg and was told to expect a limp for the rest of his life. That meant no more wrestling so he worked as hard as he could to get back here. He started getting better and was given a clean bill of health so he was back at Slammiversary.

That’s where he pinned Eric Young and was ready to face Eddie Edwards and Ace Austin to win the title. Then Young got jealous and stomped his leg with a steel chair. Now he’s back where he was seven months ago and the doctor said it’s different. If Swann gets back in the ring, he won’t live a normal life. Swann has to think about his family and therefore, he has to retire. He thanks everyone and hopes he has made a positive impact.

Cue the locker room to surround the ring and slap the mat in Swann’s honor. The Rascalz hold the ropes open for him and help him get to the floor. Swann gets to the stage….and here’s Young to take the crutch and hit him in the leg again. Everyone (minus Swann that is) chases Young off to end the show. This was REALLY good as Swann sold the heck out of everything and I can even live with it being about Young.

Overall Rating: B-. The ending segment helped a lot but the Wrestle House stuff continues to be in a completely different world. I’m not sure where that is all going but it is certainly a different way to go with things. The rest of the show is good enough and this was a little better than last week’s, so maybe they can start getting back on the right track.

Results

Moose b. Heath – Rollup with tights

Alisha Edwards/Susie b. Johnny Swinger – Double splash

Eddie Edwards b. Sami Callihan – Boston Knee Party

Kylie Rae b. Rosemary – Superkick

TJP/Fallah Bahh b. Chris Bey/Rohit Raju – Cross armbreaker to Bey

 

 

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