Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

So here we are. After all these months, we’ve finally arrived at Wrestlemania and as JR has put it, it don’t get no bigger than this. The main event is Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar (THIS TIME FOR SURE!), along with Ronda Rousey making her long awaited in-ring debut. It’s hard to say what to expect, other than a very long show with a lot of stuff crammed in. Let’s get to it.

I was in the stadium for this show. My seat was in the lower arena in the corner, opposite the hard camera. I was looking almost directly at the upper right hand ring post.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler are in on commentary for this, along with Saxton. I was coming into the stadium as the wrestlers came down the ramp so my timing couldn’t have been much better. As usual, it’s almost impossible to tell what’s going on to start until Aiden English is eliminated. Anderson gets rid of Viktor and it’s already time for Ziggler to do his last second saves.

There goes Hawkins (who I still can’t wait to see actually win something) R-Truth and Goldust reunite for all of eight seconds before Goldust tosses him. With an incorrect countdown to Wrestlemania clock on the screen, Primo is eliminated as well. Mike Kanellis is out (I forgot he worked here too) as Byron tries to explain the Woken Universe to JR. With Jim not exactly sounding interested, Apollo knees Breeze out.

Viktor is out next and the ring is starting to clear a bit, at least to the point where you can at least see the mat. Matt does his rapid fire rams into the buckles to rock Goldust, drawing another DELETE chant. Ryder loads up the Broski Boot on Ziggler but Mojo Rawley runs him over for another elimination to make the fans hate him even more. Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows and we take a break.

Back (After they showed the commercial in the stadium. You know, the place WHERE WE’RE WATCHING WHAT THEY’RE ADVERTISING!) with Revival getting rid of Apollo. Wilder is sent to the apron but a Dawson save allows them to eliminate Benjamin instead. The Revival is sent out at the same time, followed by Kane getting rid of the Miztourage. We cut to the crowd where John Cena is watching as a fan (because of course he is) and come back to see Cara being tossed as well.

Kane uppercuts Fandango out and Slater makes the mistake of going to the apron, allowing Corbin to get rid of him as well. Gable joins him on the floor, leaving us with Corbin, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Fandango, Kane, O’Neil and Dillinger. That means a Kane vs. Corbin showdown but everyone else interferes before anything happens. Titus starts cleaning house and throws Ziggler over his shoulders, only to get superkicked and clotheslined out. Goldust snaps off the powerslam to Ziggler and it’s Shattered Dreams to Tye.

Ziggler is ready for him though and dumps Goldust but gets punched down by Hardy. That gives us the TEN vs. DELETE showdown, which I didn’t know I needed to see. A Twist of Fate is enough to get rid of Dillinger, followed by Ziggler superkicking Kane’s hands. Kane dumps him without much effort but Corbin dumps his fellow giant to get us down to Mojo, Corbin and Hardy. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the double teaming begins. Not that it matters as we’ve got Bray Wyatt to save Hardy, allowing him to eliminate Rawley. Wyatt takes End of Days but Matt gets rid of Corbin to win at 16:34 as Wyatt wasn’t entered.

Rating: D-. Yeah this was terrible, running WAY too long and making me wonder when it was going to be over. So many of these people just don’t need to be on Wrestlemania (Hawkins, Ascension, R-Truth, Primo, Kanellis, Rawley to name a few) and they’re just extending the show by being in this. Matt winning makes the most sense as it’s not like many other people in the match are doing anything at the moment.

Matt and Bray pose post match as Bray is officially good. Now just don’t get injured and lose your spot again.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

The title is vacant coming in, Drake Maverick is at ringside and Ali is SubZero for some reason. Cedric shouts a lot and they shake hands for the sake of good sportsmanship. An exchange of shoulders goes to Cedric so Ali snaps off a hurricanrana for our first standoff. Back up and Cedric flips away to grab a headscissors, followed by a dropkick for two. Ali gets sent to the floor and taken down by a big flip dive but there’s no commercial, despite the announcers sounding like they were sending us to one. Nice change of pace for once.

Back in and we hit a waistlock to keep Ali down and a high backdrop gives Cedric two. Another waistlock and a knee to the ribs keep Cedric on target as he certainly has a game plan. Cedric plants him with a Spanish Fly and counters a tornado DDT by crotching Ali on top. With Ali stunned, Cedric goes up as well but gets caught in a super Spanish Fly, which even impresses Cena. The 054 is broken up with a shove to the floor and now we go to the inset ad for Rousey’s debut. At least they didn’t show this in the stadium, which would have almost been just as annoying as showing the whole thing.

Back with Cedric getting caught in a reverse hurricanrana and now the tornado DDT connects. The 054 hits this time but Cedric gets his foot on the ropes. Another 054 attempt misses and Alexander elbows him in the head. Ali gets elbowed down again and the Lumbar Check gives him the title at 12:18.

Rating: B-. This was a lot less competitive than I remember it being as Alexander dominated from the beginning and ran over Ali save for a little flurry near the end. Alexander winning is the right call and I’m glad neither of them went heel here. They both looked good but Ali was a step behind what he usually does here. I had a good time with it and Cedric winning is a feel good moment. That’s all you could ask for here.

Kickoff Show: Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Naomi, Carmella, Mandy Rose, Peyton Royce, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Sarah Logan, Dakota Kai, Sasha Banks, Mickie James, Bianca Belair, Becky Lynch, Kairi Sane, Taynara Conti, Sonya Deville, Lana, Bayley, Ruby Riott, Natalya, Dana Brooke

Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary. Royce, Devi, Kai, Belair, Sane and Conti are from NXT. Lynch, Bayley and Banks are the only ones to get entrances. Carmella poses with the briefcase at the bell and gets gang attacked, meaning it’s an early elimination. It’s Dana being circled (Dana: “THAT’S NOT NICE!”) and gang attacked for the elimination.

Everything breaks down and the NXT women stand tall, meaning it’s time for the required NXT chant. Becky yells at Devi for stealing the orange look and gets slammed for her complaints. Mandy gets tossed and Paige is panicking. Deville is slammed down and Belair is allowed to hit a 450 as we take a break.

Back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow on Riott during the commercial. Devi is tossed and Conti is knocked out a few seconds later. Belair whips Becky with the hair but gets kicked out in short order. Kai kicks Naomi in the face to put her under the ropes and out to the floor. Banks gets rid of Kai and Riott punches Mickie out. Now it’s Royce firing off some kicks but the Riott Squad superkick her out to a chorus of boos.

We’re down to the Squad, Natalya, Banks, Bayley and Naomi on the floor. Natalya suplexes Riott and Logan down but Bayley saves Sasha from the same. Bayley and Sasha get rid of Natalya, Morgan, Riott and Logan in short order. They stare each other down and Bayley gets the quick elimination. Cue Naomi though and the Rear View is good for the win at 9:49.

Rating: D+. I liked it better than the men’s version (that’s not exactly a high bar to clear) but egads what is the point in giving this to Naomi? She’s been doing a grand total of nothing in recent weeks (months really) and there was a story between Banks and Bayley. This feels like giving Orton the Royal Rumble last year in that someone has to win it, even if

And now, the main show.

Khloe and Halle sing America the Beautiful. They’re billed as “the future of music” but I’m not convinced. If that’s the case, I’d expect an original song.

The opening video is about having a good time, just like it was four years ago. The camera walks through the streets of New Orleans and goes into a cafe/club before someone goes onto a balcony to throw beads down to a crowd below. The regular highlight package, set to Kid Rock’s Celebrate and mixed with Wrestlemania XXX highlights (good choice really), takes us into the stadium and my goodness the set looks amazing. It’s designed to look like a Mardi Gras mask, though the bottom looks like a huge mustache over the entrance. Also, several of the wrestlers’ eyes will appear in the mask for a very cool touch.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending after both challengers beat him in one night, which is totally the same thing or something. Rollins has blue contacts in, I guess making him the ice to the fire that burns it down? Still though, looks pretty cool. In another cool addition, there are some personalized 3D projections for some wrestlers, including Miz’s name with quotes around him saying how great and awesome Miz is. These could only be seen on the monitors so I didn’t notice them until the second match.

Miz, looking even goofier than usual with what looks like a red version of Drew Gulak’s old gear, sends the Miztourage to the back so he can do this on his own. Balor has a rainbow shirt on with a group of fans in identical shirts cheering him on from the stage. The screens say “for everyone” with FOR EVER capitalized.

Balor sends Miz into Rollins to start and some rollups get two for all three of them. With Miz being sent outside, Rollins superkicks Balor in the ribs, only to get sent outside. That means a big flip dive onto the two of them as Balor gets the first real advantage. Everyone heads back inside with Rollins hitting a double Blockbuster for two on Balor. Miz takes Rollins down and grabs a chinlock for a few seconds to slow things down. A neckbreaker gets two on Balor and it’s back to the chinlock.

Balor fights up and stomps on Miz’s ribs but gets caught with a Sling Blade from Rollins. Seth isn’t done and hits a suicide dive on both guys, only to get caught in a Sling Blade from Balor. Miz’s short DDT gets two on Seth and he boots Rollins in the face to break up a springboard. A dragon screw legwhip sets up the Figure Four on Balor but here’s Rollins with a frog splash for the break. That looked much better on screen as you didn’t see Rollins until he was on the top and ready to jump.

They all head outside again with Balor escaping the shoulder breaking barricade bomb. Instead it’s a Sling Blade to put Rollins down but he’s back up with an enziguri to rock Balor. That earns him a Pele and the 1916 for two as Balor is stunned. Miz catches Balor on top but gets caught in a buckle bomb, leaving Balor to take the superplex into a Falcon Arrow but Balor reverses into a small package for two. A Skull Crushing Finale gets two on Rollins to cap off a rocking sequence.

Another Finale is reversed into a rollup for two but Balor gets crotched on top. Rollins goes up top with him but Miz is right there with a super Skull Crushing Finale (looked better than it sounds). The cover is broken up with a Coup de Grace and a second hits Miz clean. Rollins runs over with a Stomp to drive Balor’s head into Miz’s back, followed by the regular version to pin Miz for the title at 15:30.

Rating: B. This was the kind of match you expect from the Intercontinental Title as all three were working hard and the match felt very crisp at the same time. Miz will get the title back someday and break both records, as he should. I’m sure Balor will get the title as well, which is nothing but good for the Intercontinental Title. If nothing else it’s cool to see the former World Champions becoming Intercontinental Champions. That wasn’t always the case (After Pedro Morales, the next former World Champion to win an Intercontinental Title was HHH in 2001) but it’s a good way to give the title some more instant credibility.

Ad for the Andre documentary. I’ve heard good things.

Cena is still a fan. How cool would it be to have him next to you at Wrestlemania?

We recap Charlotte vs. Asuka, which is title vs. streak. Charlotte has dominated the Women’s Division for nearly three years now but Asuka hasn’t a match since debuting in late 2015. The match here is Queen vs. Empress with Charlotte saying she’s ready for Asuka.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and copies HHH’s entrance from Wrestlemania XXX with a throne and three masked men helping her off. These three: Riddick Moss, Tino Sabbatelli and Dan Matha. I’m assuming this was something about she once helped HHH off the throne but now she has her own, but it felt like a tribute to HHH more than anything else. Asuka on the other hand has 3D masks superimposed over her entrance. You know, in case it wasn’t scary enough already.

They fight over a wristlock to start with both of them flipping away, leaving Charlotte to hit the strut. Charlotte trips her down and goes for the leg but Asuka kicks her away, setting up a knee shot for two. Back up and Asuka’s hip attack is blocked so it’s time for the chops. The second hip attack sends Charlotte outside and you can see the cockiness on Asuka’s face.

Charlotte gets back in and it’s time to start cranking on the arm to set up the Asuka Lock. It’s way too early for that though so Charlotte strikes her in the face a few times but has to break another attempt. This time it’s a backpack Stunner to get Charlotte out of trouble and some knees to the head (think the Stomp but with a knee) put Asuka down again. The moonsault misses though as Asuka catches her in a triangle (SWEET!) in the middle of the ring.

That’s reverses into a Boston crab but Asuka rolls her way out of it. They head to the apron (becoming way too common) and Asuka suplexes her down to the floor in a big crash. Back in and the missile dropkick puts Charlotte down for two and Asuka is getting frustrated. They go up top and it’s a super Spanish Fly (I believe that’s three on the night so far) to give Charlotte a big breather.

Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold on the mat before switching to the Asuka Lock. Charlotte reverses that with a rollup before cutting Asuka in half with a spear for a VERY near fall. With Asuka half done, Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight, balancing on one hand because of the banged up arm. After hanging on as long as she can, Asuka ACTUALLY TAPS to retain Charlotte’s title at 13:05.

Rating: A-. I was kind of stunned at the amount of time this had as I would have bet on it being at least five minutes longer. This felt like a clash of titans and Charlotte winning gives her a very strong case for being the best of all time. Aside from not being around as long as some others, she has the resume, skill and pure skill to make her the best WWE has ever seen.

Having Asuka do a lot of her usual stuff (albeit cranked up a few notches) was a great way to set up the match as Charlotte was able to hang on and use what she had seen along with her natural athleticism to be ready for what Asuka brought. It was hard hitting, told a story and was an instant classic. Great stuff here, which shouldn’t be that surprising.

Post match Asuka says Charlotte was ready for Asuka and congratulates her.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something (the words “Taker is here” may have been spoken) so Cena jumps the barricade (security around here sucks) and sprints up the ramp. That took something away from the women’s moment. Do the commercial and then move on to the Cena angle. It’s not going to make that much of a difference and lets the women have their full moment.

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Rusev vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending after having a three way feud with Roode and Mahal for the last few weeks. Rusev pinned Orton in a tag match to be added, along with being one of the hottest guys in the company. Aiden English (who has gotten his hair cut since the battle royal) introduces Rusev, in rhyme of course. You can see the fans heading for the concourse during the entrances, which is rather interesting given how popular Rusev was over the weekend. Aside from a Wrestlemania shirt, I saw more Rusev Day shirts than anything else. I guess the repelling powers of Mahal and Orton are too much even for Rusev Day.

The early threat of an RKO sends Mahal bailing to the floor and Rusev dropkicks Roode to the floor. Rusev cannonballs off the apron to take out Orton and Mahal as Phillips acknowledges the popularity of Rusev Day. Back in and Roode’s Blockbuster gets two, leaving Mahal to get punched back and forth between Roode and Orton. A superplex brings Roode down but it’s Mahal asking Rusev for an alliance.

Rusev, realizing that he should have been Mahal last year, stomps Mahal down in the corner instead before getting two off a belly to back suplex. Roode is back with a spinebuster for two on Mahal but gets posted by Orton. Now it’s Rusev kicking Orton down until a spinwheel kick misses. The hanging DDT plants Rusev and English is starting to panic. A pair of RKO’s take out English and Rusev, followed by one to Mahal for a near fall with Roode making the save. Mahal takes a Machka Kick but can’t get the Accolade. Instead he has to deal with Sunil Singh and walks into the Khallas to make Mahal champion at 8:15.

Rating: D. And that is the big middle finger to the fans who thought they were getting somewhere with the Rusev Day chants. WWE wants Jinder Mahal to be pushed in this role and the lack of success and complete apathy to his push means nothing. This is what WWE wants and you can chant RUSEV DAY and buy his merchandise all you want. Mahal is WWE’s guy right now and you can just deal with it until they’re tired of him. Rusev taking the fall here is all the evidence you need: your voices don’t matter here and get over it. The match was as uninteresting as these four were going to be, which was completely expected.

The Fashion Police try to give Mick Foley a ticket but Breeze likes his style, driving Fandango to his knees in terror.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon. Rousey signed with WWE earlier in the year but Angle thinks HHH and Stephanie are just trying to use her. This set off a feud between the two teams with Rousey beating HHH much, only to have Stephanie put her through a table. The match was set up because Rousey needs a debut and putting her in a tag match is the best possible idea. It lets them hide her negatives and accentuate her positives so this has some potential. Of course there’s also the potential that it’s really just about Stephanie, which certainly wouldn’t be outside the realm of possibility.

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle

In a near repeat of last year, HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles with a group of motorcycles accompanying them. I don’t know if HHH is just that big a fan of motorcycles or if he just wanted to see his wife as a biker chick again (fair enough) but this didn’t do much for me. Rousey comes out in a Roddy Piper style kilt, in what shouldn’t be a shock to anyone paying attention whatsoever. The fans give Rousey a nice reaction and Stephanie pie faces her before the bell. They’re already milking the heck out of Rousey murdering her and a hair pull makes things even worse.

The men start things off with the fans telling Angle that he still has it. Angle cranks on the arm as they’re actually treating this like a tag match to start. Stephanie offers a low bridge though and HHH sends him into the steps to really take over. A suplex brings Angle back inside and we’re just waiting on this to explode. Back in and HHH calls for and delivers a spinebuster for two. Angle kicks him away and nearly into Stephanie but HHH puts the brakes on in time. A suplex drops HHH, only to have Stephanie pull Rousey off the apron. I’ll give Stephanie this: she knows how to be an amazing heel.

Another kick to the floor is enough for the tag to Rousey and the place goes coconuts. Rousey EXPLODES into the corner (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!”) to pull Stephanie in and scores with a running clothesline. With Stephanie in big trouble (Rouse: “COME ON B****!”), Rousey takes her into the corner and unloads with rights and lefts before throwing Stephanie again. It’s already time for the arm….and Stephanie blocks it by stacking her up.

Back up and Rousey goes into Beast Mode, setting up a spinning Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee out. Rousey: “You’re the biggest cheater I’ve ever seen! I’m going to go continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls Rousey outside as well but Angle takes him onto the announcers’ table. Kurt gets thrown onto the other table so HHH can check on Stephanie. He turns around to see Rousey though and it’s time for some intergender violence.

You can see HHH thinking about it and the fans are WAY into this one. He finally agrees to it and Rousey UNLOADS on him with rights and lefts to drive HHH into the corner. A fireman’s carry has HHH in trouble but Stephanie makes the save. This was GREAT with HHH selling the heck out of the beating and making Rousey look that much better. Stephanie slaps Rousey for some reason and the chase is on, this time with Stephanie sending him into the barricade.

HHH takes Rousey down though and it’s time for Angle to unleash the suplexes. The rolling German suplexes have HHH in trouble but he tries a quick Pedigree. That’s reversed into a catapult into the corner (he always takes that so well) and the Angle Slam gets two. There go the straps (that never gets old) but Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock. Angle doesn’t seem to mind and puts the ankle lock on her (doesn’t look great this time around). That’s broken up with a Pedigree but Rousey makes a save.

A powerbomb attempt to Rousey is countered into a hurricanrana (good one too) and there’s the armbar on HHH. The place (including me) goes even more nuts until Stephanie makes the save with a sleeper (called a rear naked choke, which of course Stephanie knows how to do). That’s reversed into another armbar attempt but Stephanie blocks AGAIN.

The ankle lock goes on HHH and the villains grab hands until HHH sends Angle into the women for the break. Angle and Rousey both get posted and it’s time for the double Pedigree. Kurt sends HHH to the floor and the armbar….is blocked for a third time. Rousey FINALLY gets it on and Stephanie taps at 20:38. Dana White is shown applauding Rousey from the front row.

Rating: A-. I can’t give it anything higher than that due to Stephanie going toe to toe with Rousey (at grappling nonetheless) but this was INCREDIBLY fun and far better than anything I was expecting. They pulled every trick they could to make Rousey look better here and it worked to near perfection. She looked like someone who had been doing this for years and came off like a star who is in this for the long haul. Absolutely incredible here and as entertaining as it could have been. I had a blast, Stephanie issues aside. The ending was fine and the most important part, so we’ll call this a major success.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

The Usos are defending, the New Day has 3D pancakes and, with the call of the DragonZord, Woods’ trombone summons an army of little people dressed like pancakes. I do like the Bludgeon Brothers’ logo with the arms holding hammers to make a B. Kofi wastes no time hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jimmy but Harper makes the save. The Brothers pulls Big E. to the floor for a beating and then powerbomb Woods into the post for good measure.

Back in and Kofi’s beating continues but Jimmy tags himself in and starts kicking away. Some superkicks do a little good but Harper shoves Jimmy into the corner. Jey tags himself in as well (must be a family thing) and starts kicking away, only to have Rowan break up the double Us.

Rating: D+. This feels like a victim of time but it’s not the worst thing in the world. They went out of their way to make the Brothers look like killers and that’s exactly what happened here. I could have gone for a little more time given to the match, but something has to be cut on a show this long and this was one of the most logical choices. The Brothers won though and that’s what matters the most.

Here’s John Cena for a match, though no opponent has been named yet. A second referee runs down though and tells Cena something is wrong. Cena grabs the referee as he’s shaking his head no. This goes on for a bit….and there go the lights….because Elias is here. Elias: “Were you expecting somebody else?”

Well that someone doesn’t have the charisma Elias has, nor does he have the talent that Elias carries in his soul. Cena bails back to his seat in disgust and leaves Elias alone to sing his song, insulting the fans as he always does. As you might guess, Cena gets up and cleans house by initiating his finishing sequence.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner and hammers away, including the running clothesline. Old School sets up Snake Eyes and the WORST BIG BOOT EVER. When you’re sitting hundreds of feet away from the ring and can see the gap between the boot and the hands in front of Cena’s face, it’s a really bad sign. But remember, HE STILL HAS IT. The chokeslam is countered into a belly to back suplex but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, sending Cena falling off his feet in shock. The chokeslam and Tombstone end Cena completely clean at 2:42. Undertaker doesn’t even seem to be sweating.

So….that happened. I definitely like it better than seeing Undertaker stumble through a long match and it certainly should be memorable. Of course it’s not likely to mean anything until next Wrestlemania season, but this is the perfect payoff: Cena has been acting like a complete and utter jerk this whole time and Undertaker threw him the most decisive beating of his career. Even the Lesnar squash saw Cena get in a little offense and a near fall. Here it was a single suplex and that was it. I’m fine with Undertaker going out like this, but at this point I have no reason to believe it’s over.

Hall of Fame video. Hillbilly Jim should be done any minute now.

Here’s the big presentation to the crowd.

Jeff Jarrett. Nice reaction and the strut still looks good.

Mark Henry. No salmon jacket, no buys.

Hillbilly Jim. My hero as a young Kentucky boy.

Ivory. She’s looking better now than she did when she was active.

Jarius JJ Robertson. Did you know he’s cute? Wasn’t sure if that was made clear.

Dudley Boyz. Yep. Next.

Goldberg. I’m hoping those chants aren’t piped in. He does a Green Lantern pose with the ring to wrap things up.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn. Owens and Zayn have been going after the two of them for months now and it wasn’t clear where things were going. Then Bryan was cleared to wrestle again and everything came together at once. The evil Canadians have been attacking both of them, including giving Shane a hernia. They’ve been fired, but Bryan wants one more match with their jobs on the line. The question here is whether or not Shane turns on Bryan, which could go either way.

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Shane is in a YES jersey, with the YES being pretty clearly taped on. That sounds like a way for a quick switch to YUP (Owens and Sami’s battle cry) for me. Bryan gets his own entrance, with a Terminator style video, showing the YES chant spreading around the world, even in mainstream sports, before locking in on the home of the YES Movement, which happens to be right here in the Superdome. You can see the emotion on Bryan’s face as he comes to the ring and it’s nearly moving to see.

Owens and Zayn’s music hit but they come in from behind for the big beatdown, including an apron bomb to Bryan. That might be enough for him as the medics come in to check. Even the fans don’t seem to buy this one, as they probably shouldn’t. Shane is willing to fight on his own and YES, we get the lame punches on Owens in the corner. The jumping elbow to the jaw puts Owens down but Shane has to beat up Zayn as well.

Now of course he can do that at the same time, including a jumping kick to Owens and a Maivia Hurricane to Sami. The old hernia pops up though and brings Shane down as we have a stretcher for Bryan. We settle down to Sami taking over on Shane before it’s off to Owens (thankfully in a KO Mania III shirt) to step on the stomach. Owens: “MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY! MONEY ISN’T GOING TO SAVE YOU NOW!”

A superkick sets up the Blue Thunder Bomb for two but Owens gets knocked to the floor. The Helluva Kick misses and Sami gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Of course Shane is fine enough to hit the Coast to Coast but Owens makes the save with a backsplash onto the bad stomach. The frog splash gets two but Bryan comes back in for the save. That’s not enough for a hot tag so Sami gets out of a chinlock by slamming Sami into the mat.

NOW it’s off to Bryan for the first time in nearly three years. He takes his time coming in (as he should) before hammering away on Zayn. There’s the moonsault into the running clothesline, followed by a running knee off the apron to Owens. A missile dropkick puts Bryan down but he grabs his head….and nips up because he’s fine. That was a scary but great moment. The running corner dropkicks rock Owens and Zayn and a top rope hurricanrana drops Sami. Kevin breaks up the knee though and the Helluva Kick is only good for two. My goodness finishers mean nothing on Wrestlemania night.

Owens tells him to stay retired and gets two more off the Pop Up Powerbomb. Since we haven’t seen him in long enough, Shane takes Owens down and we’re back to even again. Back in and Sami hammers away while asking how Bryan could do this to them. That’s enough for Bryan and he unloads with the strikes and YES Kicks, even hitting the big one. The running knee into the YES Lock is good for the submission at 15:25 to keep Owens and Zayn fired.

Rating: C+. This was of course ALL about Bryan, to the point where even Shane’s usual superhero efforts seem to pale in comparison. They didn’t go with the stupid swerve finish for the sake of the storyline because this needed to be Bryan’s night. To go from having no chance to wrestling in a huge Wrestlemania match is more than you could ever ask for and he doesn’t look like he’s lost a step. If he’s back full time, WWE just got one heck of a bonus. Not a great match, but the ending was what it should have been.

Bryan and Shane celebrate with Bryan going to the floor to kiss Brie in a nice moment.

Attendance announcement.

We recap Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax. Bliss had been her friend for a long time but was eventually caught making fun of Nia’s size and weight. This didn’t sit well with Jax and it was time to SMASH. And take the title. Bliss is suddenly ultra confident despite being a foot shorter and about 160lbs lighter.

Raw Women’s Title: Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Bliss is challenging and comes down from the set on a mini platform. So that’s what happened to Bad News Barrett’s stage. Hang on a second though as Nia needs to destroy Mickie James before the bell, meaning this is truly one on one. Bliss slaps Nia due to high levels of stupid and Jax’s growl gives us a horror movie level scream in response. Makes sense actually.

There’s a gorilla press to plant Bliss as the dominance isn’t taking time tonight. That’s not the beginning of the end for some reason as Bliss starts in on the knee to take over, including a double knee to the knee in the corner. A guillotine choke is shrugged off but Nia goes shoulder first into the post (WAY too common of a spot tonight). Twisted Bliss to the floor drops Nia and the DDT gets two, shocking/scaring the heck out of Bliss all over again.

For some reason Bliss calls Nia pathetic and slaps her a few times….until Nia grabs her by the throat. A charge into the corner is cut off by another kick to the knee but Bliss’ sunset flip is tossed into the corner. Bliss is right back with a poke to the eye but Nia is right back with one of the hardest Alabama Slams you’ll ever see. Since Bliss is mostly dead, it’s a super Samoan drop to put her away for good and make Nia champion at 9:01.

Rating: D+. I was firmly in the camp of this needing to be about a minute long with Bliss getting in nothing beyond a few harmless forearms and I’m still of that state of mind. Bliss didn’t look like a joke here but there’s a time to squash the heck out of someone and that’s what we had here. Jax is a monster and should have destroyed Bliss in short order. Bliss is going to be fine with one more of those cocky promos and it really would have been better to have her get crushed here. The ending did look great though and the right person won, but it’s the wrong path to get here.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. AJ Styles is the ace of the show and has beaten everyone put in front of him. Shinsuke Nakamura won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot and we have a dream match. Both guys have promised to win and hopefully they don’t collapse under the expectations. The hype video goes throughout AJ’s career, including clips of him on Thunder and from TNA (!) because WWE can just do something like that.

Smackdown World Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by an army of violinists plus Alice Cooper guitarist Nita Strauss playing the heck out of a guitar. That’s one of the better Wrestlemania entrances I’ve ever seen with Strauss’ playing stealing the show. AJ’s graphic lists him as the Universal Champion. If nothing else he gets a cool looking spinning ring of blue light around him once he gets inside for a cool visual.

Feeling out process to start as the announcers talk about the Japanese match without talking about the Japanese match. AJ drives him into the corner but gets shoved away as they’re still in low first gear. They hit the mat with Nakamura kicking him in the face before doing his head on the chest arm waving deal. A knee drop keeps AJ in trouble but he breaks up Good Vibrations to offer some mind games of his own.

Back to the corner we go with a hard forearm rocking Styles but he grabs a backbreaker for his first major offense. A knee drop gets two on Nakamura and it’s off to the chinlock. The drop down into a dropkick sends Nakamura outside but he kicks the leg out from the apron. A kick to the head really puts Styles in trouble and a middle rope kick to the face makes it even worse. Nakamura tells him to come on but kicks AJ down. Well dude if you want him to COME ON you have to give him the chance to pull it off.

The running knee in the corner rocks AJ but he’s right back with a pumphandle gutbuster for two. It’s Nakamura’s turn to come back in a hurry though and a Landslide (Samoan Driver) gets another near fall. Some right hands in the corner have AJ rocked but he kicks the knee out to take Nakamura down. There’s the Calf Crusher but Nakamura reverses into a triangle choke (another very popular move this weekend).

That’s broken up with something close to a Death Valley Driver and they’re both down again. Nakamura gets in the kick, only to come up holding the damaged leg. There’s some logic to Styles’ plan at least. The running knee hits the buckle and the Phenomenal Forearm gets two.

AJ needs to bring out the mega guns and tries the springboard 450, which hits the bad knee and gives Nakamura two off a small package. They slug it out until AJ Peles him down, only to get kneed in the back of the head. Nakamura has had it and drives knees into the head before slapping AJ a few times. The Kinshasa is loaded up but AJ rolls through, straight into the Styles Clash to retain at 20:20.

Rating: B. Yeah they didn’t really come close to the expectations here and I can’t say I’m surprised. They didn’t have much going on in the way of telling a story other than both guys hitting their big moves and countering a few of the other’s. There’s no reason to hate either of them and that makes for a dull match if you don’t build to a big finish. It’s certainly good but it never hit that next level that people were expecting. Oh and both Royal Rumble winners lose in their title shots. What a great use of the pay per view.

Post match Nakamura presents AJ with the title….and hits him low (with some Ric Flair level force) to turn heel. Nakamura mocks the fallen champion and kicks him to the floor for Kinshasa. For some reason he flashes a Diamond Cutter sign as he goes up the ramp. Maybe he’s a DDP Yoga user?

Now this was good, but why not do this BEFORE NAKAMURA LOST CLEAN? Do it at the worthless Fastlane or on any show before this match. Give them something more personal to fight over, because what we got for a story here was lacking a bit. I don’t get why WWE thinks this has as much of an impact after a loss, because it really doesn’t work. If nothing else have Nakamura hit him low to steal the title after Kinshasa didn’t get the job done. Just something other than this.

Kickoff Show recap.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

Strowman won the shot by winning a tag team battle royal on his own and his partner has been quite the topic of debate coming into this show. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float to the tune of When the Saints Go Marching In before switching to their usual entrance. I was worried I was a bit too tired and imagined all the costumed people on the float but not so much apparently.

Strowman comes out and turns the float over off the stage but has no partner. He knows everyone wants to know who it is, but he wanted to wait until he got to New Orleans. That’s because his partner….is a member of the WWE Universe. Strowman looks around forever and finally sees someone in the crowd. He goes into the crowd (this is taking WAY too long) and finds….a ten year old boy. The boy, named Nicholas, is introduced as Strowman’s partner as Graves is losing his mind.

Nicholas is terrified (completely understandable) as Braun starts (good idea) with Sheamus. Graves isn’t sure about this as Nicholas probably has algebra tomorrow. Fans: “WE WANT NICHOLAS!” A chokeslam gets two on Cesaro but Braun gets double suplexes. With Sheamus talking trash to Nicholas, he drops a top rope knee for two. On Braun, not the kid.

Braun crossbodies both of them down and Sheamus gets backdropped over the corner for a NASTY fall, hitting both the post and the steps on the way down. That’s enough for the tag to Nicholas….who tags straight out again. The powerslam on Cesaro is good for the pin and the titles at 3:57.

Rating: F. I laughed when it happened but the more I think about this, the worse and worse it looks. If you want to do this over a comedy team or something then fine, but after everything Cesaro and Sheamus have done over the last few years, this is the best they can get? Having Brains Strowman come out there would have been a better move as this comes off as a stupid idea where they just refused to pick something and went with the first stupid idea that came to their heads. Put Hawkins out there if this is the best thing you can come up with. I didn’t like this idea as it makes it into a total joke, which shouldn’t be the case.

Wrestlemania XXXV is in New York. Well New Jersey but whatever. I’m good on that one.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns. Lesnar won the Universal Title at last year’s show and Reigns won the Elimination Chamber after doing nothing main event level for months. Reigns went on to call Lesnar out for not being here all the time and just doing what’s best for himself, which earned Reigns a series of beatings. But hey, this time for sure, right?

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and nope, the plan didn’t work. As you might expect, the fans boo him out of the building all over again because THIS ISN’T WORKING. After the Big Match Intros, Lesnar hits three German suplexes in the first thirty seconds. Reigns is right back up with two Superman Punches and a running clothesline to put Lesnar on the floor. Brock grabs a belly to belly on the outside, followed by a second one with Reigns almost landing on his head.

The fans chant for CM Punk as Brock loads up the announcers’ table. Another belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the table (no elevation at all) and Brock hits another German suplex back inside. A seventh suplex (with a fan providing helpful signs) is almost completely flat as we’re just waiting on the beach balls now.

There’s another belly to belly, during which time the fans started doing the Wave. A fan in my section started shouting about how the fans should just leave if they’re that bored because they’re ruining it for the rest of the fans. He was promptly given a DELETE chant because wrestling fans are rather horrible people at times. It’s time for another table as the fans want Johnny Gargano.

Reigns posts him on the floor as the fans aren’t reacting in the slightest. A spear sends Lesnar over the table (still no reaction) as the Wave is in full swing. The fans loudly boo….because a beach ball is taken away. Reigns gets two off a Superman Punch and two spears and it’s beach ball time again. Brock blocks a spear with a knee for two, followed by the F5 for the same. The fans still aren’t interested, because this just isn’t anything they care about.

F5, two, F5, two (Brock: “MOTHERF*****!”), the fans chant BORING (actually acknowledging the match for a change, F5 through a table (to NO reaction), F5, two. That’s enough for Lesnar as he takes the gloves off and just unloads with the hard right hands as the fans declare this awful. Reigns is GUSHING blood but hits two spears for a near fall. Not that it matters as a sixth F5 retains the title at 15:49, shocking the heck out of the crowd.

Rating: D. Here’s the thing: the match itself is a hard hitting video game match and had some entertaining spots. If you watch it in a complete vacuum, it’s actually good. The problem is, at least in this case, you can’t just ignore everything else and watch the match on its own. This was a complete and utter rejection of everything going on and you can’t ignore it. I’m not sure how much more needs to be done to make it clear that Reigns isn’t working but this might be it. Either that or we try to do this again NEXT year, just because that’s what WWE is obsessed with doing.

I have no idea where they go from here as Lesnar might not be around much longer and other than Reigns, there’s no one that could conceivably take the title from him. Reigns winning here was the logical call, but I can see why they pulled the plug. If it’s that bad though and the fans have rejected him this many times in a row, it’s time to admit defeat and move on. Hopefully that’s what the loss means, but stranger things have happened, just with Roman alone actually.

After a long highlight package, as in about seven minutes long, a cleaned up Reigns walks up the ramp to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. You know, there’s a pattern to these mega long shows. For the last three years, they’ve all started off white hot for about two hours but then they hit a road block and go sailing off a cliff. In Dallas it was the Cell, in Orlando it was the mixed tag and here it was pretty much everything after Rousey’s match (Bryan and Styles’ matches ranged from good to acceptable).

Maybe it’s having Reigns as the big finish or maybe it’s just the length of the shows, but they simply can’t maintain the momentum they set up at the start of these shows. It’s like they just run out of ideas and throw whatever nonsense they have on the screen, which may or may not work. I can get that with a small writing staff, but with THIRTY WRITERS put together into two groups, there’s never an excuse to run out of ideas this quickly.

Overall, the show is more good than bad, thanks to the first two matches, the mixed tag, Bryan and AJ, but they really needed to shed….oh a good two hours to get this down to manageable. Notice that I keep saying that year after year. Seven hours is just not something that anyone can pull off because eventually your buzz goes away. It’s happened to me three years in a row and I can’t imagine I’m in the minority. Just give us a break at some point because not everyone needs to be on the show. If you’re only good enough to be thrown into the battle royal, odds are you don’t belong on the card.

Really, the mixed tag main eventing would have made more sense (like you would EVER have to ask Stephanie if she wanted to main event Wrestlemania). If they were going to pull the plug on Reigns winning the title here, go with the feel good, fun match and let Rousey look like the big star. It would make more sense but Reigns seemed to be set in stone for that spot, pretty obvious reaction aside.

All in all, Wrestlemania XXXIV is a good show that needs a MAJOR edit to make it work. Switch the lineup around, shorten some matches, cut some matches (in other words, GET THE TIME LOWER) and you might have something great on your hands. As it is though, it falls into the same category as the other two mega long shows: a hot start, but they run out of gas because there’s a limit to how much wrestling any large group of fans can take.

Results

Seth Rollins b. The Miz and Finn Balor – Stomp to Miz

Charlotte b. Asuka – Figure Eight

Jinder Mahal b. Randy Orton, Bobby Roode and Rusev – Khallas to Rusev

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle b. HHH/Stephanie McMahon – Armbar to McMahon

Bludgeon Brothers b. New Day and Usos – Double sitout superbomb to Kingston

Undertaker b. John Cena – Tombstone

Shane McMahon/Daniel Bryan b. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens – YES Lock to Zayn

Nia Jax b. Alexa Bliss – Super Samoan drop

AJ Styles b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Styles Clash

Braun Strowman/Nicholas b. The Bar – Powerslam to Cesaro

Brock Lesnar b. Roman Reigns – F5

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

This hasn’t been quite a year yet but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night. Like a few years before, I was in the stadium for this show but haven’t seen it since I reviewed it last year. This is a show that was well received at the time and it could be interesting to see how it holds up a year later. Let’s get to it.

The set is one of the most intricate they’ve ever done, with a big Wrestlemania globe (ala Universal Studios) and a roller coaster next to it (I think you get this). There’s also an inflatable ring atop the structure above the regular ring, which I somehow didn’t notice until about an hour and a half of being in the stadium). The theme was the Ultimate Thrill Ride and the visual certainly works. It’s really cool looking and worked very well. Unfortunately the stadium isn’t the best looking in the world and it made the whole thing feel a bit out of place. Oh and the CRAZY LONG RAMP, which is something like seventy yards long.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Austin Aries vs. Neville

Aries is challenging after Neville has dominated the division for months and needs someone fresh to challenge him. The fans are behind Aries, which isn’t that surprising though Neville was nothing short (ok he was always short) of awesome at this point. Aries takes him down with an armbar but Neville is right back out with a headscissors. Back up and Neville has to bail to the floor so Aries has a rest on the top rope. I know it’s a Shawn Michaels spot but Aries sells the heck out of it.

Neville comes back in and eats a basement dropkick, followed by the middle rope elbow to the back for two. The suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head though as the back and forth continues. A missile dropkick gives Neville two and we take a break. Back with Neville holding a chinlock (They even do it on the Kickoff Shows!) but taking WAY too long to glare at the crowd before trying a middle rope Phoenix splash (makes sense given his King thing).

One heck of a backdrop puts Neville on the floor and Aries is right back after him with the suicide dive. You can hear the fans getting back into this and that’s a good result from these two. The main reason to put something like this on is to get the fans fired up for the real show and it’s a great place to put them in.

They come back in with Aries blocking the superplex and nailing his own missile dropkick (looked awesome too) for a near fall. A snap German suplex plants Aries though and Neville takes over again. Another suplex gets another two and Neville is starting to look annoyed. With the technical stuff not working, Neville just kicks him in the face in the corner.

Aries is fine enough to reverse the Rings of Saturn attempt into a rollup and now the Discus knocks Neville hard to the floor. Back in and Aries hits a top hurricanrana and the 450 (with a really annoying crowd reaction shot) gets two. The Last Chancery goes on but Neville rips at the eye (which was recently reconstructed) to break the hold. Aries is writhing in pain and it’s the Red Arrow to retain the title at 15:40.

Rating: B. I remember hearing that this would be on the Kickoff Show and being very relieved as I didn’t think the main show would allow it nearly the amount of time that it needed and deserved. I’m glad to see that I was right here as they had a heck of a chess match here with both guys getting in everything they could and showing how back and forth the whole thing was. Neville cheating to win in the end fit him well, as he finally had someone who could match him and had to take a shortcut. Really good stuff here as Neville continues his unbelievable roll.

If the pay per view started here, it would have been a perfect Kickoff Show. But nah, we need two more matches.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Rob Gronkowski, a friend of Mojo Rawley, is in the front row. Big Show’s music plays everyone but Braun Strowman to the ring. Braun tosses Primo two seconds into the match as the ring needs some serious cleaning out. Kalisto and Simon Gotch are tossed as well and Strowman eliminates Slater. Jimmy Uso and Goldust follow them out as they’re not wasting time here.

There goes Konnor but it’s time for the Show vs. Strowman showdown. Everyone stops to watch but Sami jumps Braun due to reasons of general stupidity. That goes nowhere so it’s Strowman dumping Show. Everyone goes after Strowman but he gets rid of Viktor in the process. Strowman is eliminated, making him look like a loser/afterthought in the process (oh….just wait). Hawkins is out and Ziggler gets to do his usual false hope spot. We get into the required “everyone hits everyone but doesn’t really try to win” portion as things slow down.

Ziggler low bridges Truth out as I manage to remember that Truth is employed. There goes Rhyno and Ziggler is thrown over the top, only to hang on again. There goes English, followed by American Alpha dropkicking English out. Jey Uso and Jason Jordan are tossed, followed by Chad Gable as the ring is really thinning out. Tian Bing gets rid of Fandango and Breeze, followed by Henry eliminating Sin Cara (in some sweet Wrestlemania gear). Henry is out next as there’s nothing between these eliminations.

Ziggler superkicks Bing out and that’s about it for Tian’s career accomplishments to date. Sami’s Helluva Kick gets rid of Epico and we’re down to nine. It’s been too long since Ziggler was nearly eliminated so Harper chokes him on the apron this time around. Mojo dumps Bo and Mahal eliminates Crews, followed by Rawley tossing Ziggler. Harper is out next and we’re down to Mojo, Jinder, Titus, Dain and Zayn.

A running clothesline gets rid of Titus but Dain eliminates Sami, completely sucking the life out of the crowd. Why you ask? Well we’re left with Dain, Rawley and Mahal. How excited would you be? Jinder gets clotheslined down and we get a Dain vs. Mojo showdown. A Pounce drops Dain but Jinder pulls Mojo through the ropes and out to the floor. Jinder follows him out and sends Rawley into the barricade, right in front of Gronkowski.

That means a drink going into Gronkowski’s face and here he comes over the barricade. This gives us the funniest part of the show as a security guard runs over to stop him, only to have a ringside guy tap her on the arm as some referees come over and allow Gronkowski to get in. Gronkowski runs Mahal over (your future WWE Champion everyone) and Mojo’s running right hands get rid of Dain. Another running punch to Mahal gives Rawley the win at 14:09.

Rating: D-. And this just LAUNCHED Mojo to the moon right? I know the idea here was to get Gronkowski involved (possibly as a substitute for Shaquille O’Neal) but Sami Zayn was RIGHT THERE to get the big win but nah, let’s go with the nothing guy winning the match. This wasn’t the best result for the battle royal but at least they were trying with Rawley, who took the time to talk to an entire group of fans when I saw him walking through Axxess that same weekend. Hopefully he gets somewhere in the future. The rest of the match was terrible with everyone being thrown out in short order and a bad ending.

Kickoff Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and I have no idea why this was on the Kickoff Show. Corbin crushed Ambrose underneath a forklift to set this up, giving us the hilarious visual of the referees trying to LIFT IT UP despite the key being in the ignition. They waste no time in fighting to the floor with Dean getting the better of it and heading back inside.

That earns him a hard whip to send Ambrose’s ribs into the post and give Corbin a nice big target. Or 24 of them in this case. A choke shove puts Dean down for two and Baron whips him into the barricade for good measure. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Dean avoids a charge to send Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin avoids the top rope elbow and blocks Dirty Deeds for good measure. That earns him a trip to the floor but Baron knocks him out of the air on a slingshot dive.

The top rope elbow puts Corbin down again though and Dean gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. These two aren’t exactly clicking so far. Deep Six gives Corbin two and works on the ribs a bit more. The Rebound Lariat runs Baron over again but he’s right back with a powerbomb to stay on the ribs. That’s about it for Corbin though as Dean jumps up and hits Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one but the bigger issue was with the ending, as Baron winning the title would have made the most sense. Making it even worse was the fact that Baron won a street fight non-title rematch two days later but none of that matters as the Superstar Shakeup changed everything a week later. The match was nothing to see either as they didn’t go into the brawl that would have suited them best.

And now on the main show, which is FIVE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES LONG. Sweet goodness and they wonder why it’s hard to make new fans.

Tinashe, who looks like a low rent Beyonce (still very attractive though with a great voice) sings America the Beautiful. This includes the Air Force flyover, which will nearly knock you off your feet.

The opening video is about how everyone wants to come here, either as a fan or as a wrestler. This is the biggest show of the year and it is the ultimate thrill ride. The video turns into a roller coaster, starting with some historic moments and going into clips of wrestlers on tonight’s show. It’s continuing the theme and that’s a good thing when so many of these shows only have a loose theme at best. Ignore the fans cheering for Miz and AJ Styles and booing the heck out of Roman Reigns of course.

Here are your hosts for the evening: the New Day, in Final Fantasy inspired gear, with Kofi riding in on their bicycle powered ice cream cart. I still have one major question: HOW DID THEY NOT HAVE ICE CREAM FOR SALE??? They teased that for weeks and NOTHING. I was looking forward to it but for some reason it just never happened. After some dancing and gyrating, Xavier says there were a lot of options to host the show. Fans: “WOO!” It was your boys the NEW DAY who got the call though and they get to tell us about all the action that we’ll be seeing tonight.

It’s time to officially pulls their levers (making Kofi and Xavier cringe) and Big E. starts sending the smiling glances over to Woods as he freaks out. This was just after the sex tape fiasco, which was hinted at but never mentioned on WWE TV. In other words, this was a nice little inside joke for the fans while not giving away anything that would be un-PG. Well done and the way this needed to be handled. New Day’s level of rock is confirmed and that’s it, wrapping up this year’s installment of an unnecessary addition to the Wrestlemania card.

We recap AJ Styles babysitting Shane McMahon. AJ lost the Smackdown World Title to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and Daniel Bryan/Shane put him in the Elimination Chamber instead of giving him a one on one rematch for the title. That’s not cool with AJ, so he beat up Shane to set up this year’s “Shane can totally wrestle if you give him one of the best performers in the world” match. They’ve attacked each other a few times each since with Shane’s punches somehow getting a little worse since last year.

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Shane’s kids are at ringside because what would Wrestlemania be without them? AJ isn’t interested in throwing punches so a quick standing switch sends Shane into the ropes. A headlock and snapmare have Shane down as AJ is toying with him to start. Shane gets in some armdrags and takes Styles down for a rollup, giving us some frustration to send AJ outside.

Back in and AJ punches him in the face as it turns into a boxing match. You know you don’t have to ask Shane to do that twice so we let the suck fly, followed by an elbow to AJ’s face. One heck of a baseball slide sends Shane over the announcers’ table as control goes hard to Styles. Back in and a knee drop rocks Shane again but of course he can shake off the Phenomenal Blitz.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up and Shane starts his dance that was stupid back in the 90s so today it’s awesome (like everything in the Attitude Era). An Angle Slam gets two on AJ but he’s right back with the Calf Crusher. Shane reverses into a rear naked choke, a cross armbreaker and something like the Rings of Saturn. He trains MMA you see. AJ shrugs them off and drops Shane again but the springboard 450 is countered into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a one armed Styles Clash, and of course Shane is up at two.

They slug it out and the fans are entirely behind AJ, even more than you might have expected them to be. I know he’s going to be the favorite coming in but this star treatment of Shane is making it even worse. The ref gets bumped (well duh) and it’s trashcan time. AJ loads up his own Coast to Coast but Shane throws the can at him (with AJ having to pull up on the dive, making it look horrible). Phillips: “AJ has stepped into Shane’s world now!” You mean high flying wrestling?

Shane’s Coast to Coast gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The big elbow misses but of course Shane is fine enough to counter the Phenomenal Forearm into a Maiavia Hurricane. That’s not enough from Shane though as he gets to try the shooting star, which only hits mat. The Phenomenal Forearm connects to finally put Shane away at 20:31.

Rating: B. Well that was Shane, with some Shane on the side and then more Shane to wrap it up. AJ looked awesome but that’s all he supposed to be. This was all about Shane getting to counter and hang with AJ, which doesn’t do Styles any good. A 40+ year old who doesn’t wrestle shouldn’t be hanging with a guy who was World Champion less than three months ago. But hey, Shane, right?

James Ellsworth is having issues working out so Ric Flair comes in to give him a Snickers. Then Ellsworth becomes Charlotte. Uh, yeah.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens. Their friendship had been having some issues of late so Jericho put together the Festival of Friendship, an over the top celebration of all things Owens and Jericho. At the end of it, Owens turns on Jericho and beat the heck out of him. Jericho came back and cost him the Universal Title at Fastlane so Owens is coming for Jericho’s Universal Title. The question became could Owens win without Jericho and now we get the chance to find out.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging. Jericho’s entrance brings back the countdown for a nice touch. Throw in the light up scarf and a big List of Jericho on the stage and this is advantage Chris. They slug it out to start with the Walls going on less than thirty seconds in. That sends Owens bailing to the floor and a top rope forearm to the head drops Owens back inside. Owens kicks him in the face and hammers away to take over.

We hit the chinlock, with some horribly obvious spot calling, followed by the backsplash for two. They head outside for the third time with Jericho backdropping his way out of the apron powerbomb. Jericho chops away and gets two off a super hurricanrana but gets clotheslined down. The frog splash misses, the Lionsault hits knees, and the Swanton hits knees as well to give us a slow down stretch.

Now the Lionsault connects for a delayed two but Owens gets in his own Walls of Jericho. A rope is grabbed so Owens tries the Cannonball, only to be reversed into the Walls. Kevin grabs the rope for the break and is right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for two. Another Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Codebreaker but Owens touches the rope with one finger for the save. That’s a sweet heel touch. Owens rolls outside and superkicks the knee, setting up the apron powerbomb to give him the pin and the title at 16:46.

Rating: C+. Not bad but they never cranked up the violence that you would have expected after seeing the Festival of Friendship. These two should have been ready to destroy each other and instead it’s just a match with Owens working the ribs and looking for a powerbomb. They accomplished the goal of making Owens look like he can win on his own, but this isn’t the way they should have gone about it.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match. Charlotte and Sasha Banks had raised the women’s division to entirely new levels and Charlotte needed a new challenger. Enter Bayley, who won the title on Raw in a big surprise, completely defeating the purpose of her character and leaving her with nothing to do. This problem would plague her for the next year and still does to this day. Nia Jax was added to the other three because you need to have as many people in Wrestlemania matches as possible.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending under elimination rules. The tube men are at ringside for a special change of pace. Sasha rides in on the back of a chauffeured car because that’s what Sasha does. Charlotte gets a crazy amount of pyro, making her look even more like a star than usual. Everyone goes after Nia to start but she wrecks them in increasingly short order. A Banzai Drop crushes Bayley and Nia throws Charlotte off the apron onto both Bayley and Sasha. There’s something about people being thrown around like weapons.

All three get together to go after Nia with Sasha wisely grabbing the leg to keep her in place. Charlotte boots Nia in the face for a double German suplex for two in a painful looking crash. Nia is back up and tries a second Banzai, only to get TripleBombed out of the corner for the elimination at 4:08.

As usual, Nia chokes in the big match because that’s just how she rolls. Charlotte pulls Bayley to the floor and it’s Sasha hitting a flip dive to take the champ down. As you might expect, it’s the corkscrew moonsault from the top to take Bayley and Sasha down again in a huge crash.

Back in and Natural Selection is countered into a failed Bank Statement attempt. Instead Charlotte gets two off a backbreaker and rips off a turnbuckle pad in frustration. Sasha’s top rope double knees are good for two of her own and the Bank Statement goes on. Sasha goes with a rollup and the kickout sends her face first into the buckle for the elimination at 8:10.

Bayley comes back in and gets her knee rammed into the exposed buckle. The moonsault, with the wind blowing Charlotte’s hair around, only hits mat to give Bayley a near fall. Charlotte is fine enough to go after the knee and grab the Figure Eight. Bayley gets to the rope so Charlotte takes her into the Tree of Woe, only to get backdropped from the top in a big crash. The big elbow is enough to retain the title at 12:04.

Rating: D. Why can’t they get these big matches right? This was completely backwards with Nia being thrown in there at the last minute and lasting all of four minutes. Then it’s Bayley not really overcoming the odds and just pinning Charlotte after shrugging off some of the offense. It’s not some come from behind win or a big moment, but really just a match where Charlotte happened to lose.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Hearing Jim Cornette’s voice in WWE is just wrong.

Diamond Dallas Page. Nice reaction and WELL deserved just for his stuff with Hall and Roberts alone.

Rock N Roll Express. WAY overdue.

Rick Rude. See the Rock N Roll Express.

Teddy Long. I defy you to not smile at this.

Eric LeGrand. Warrior Award and that’s fine.

Beth Phoenix. Fine enough if a female entrant is required.

Kurt Angle. Yep. Moving on.

Support the Boys and Girls Club! Fair request actually.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

No real story here as this is they’ve just been feuding and it’s time for a title match. Anderson and Gallows are defending and this is a ladder match because we have to have one. Enzo and Cass’ speech is short this time as they say they’re climbing every rung to win the titles. We’re ready to go….and here’s New Day. Yeah remember them?

Anyway they’re in wrestling gear here but first, an announcement. This is now a FATAL FOUR WAY with one more team to be added. That would be the HARDY BOYZ, making a shocking return and giving us a legitimate Wrestlemania moment. Before the music hit, I stood up and said “they wouldn’t”, which was aided as I couldn’t see that New Day was in ring gear. Amazing moment here and the twenty six million YouTube views suggest that it’s quite the popular idea. Cole says thinks are about to be BROKEN and Matt does the DELETE pose.

It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) and the Hardys waste no time with Poetry in Motion to Gallows. Enzo and Cass are taken down as well as the fans are entire enamored with the Hardys all over again. A Whisper in the Wind takes both Sheamus and Cesaro down and it’s time for the first ladder. Jeff goes up but it’s Gallows making a pretty easy save. Cesaro comes back in and climbs onto Gallows’ shoulders for a double stomp onto Anderson’s ribs. Well that worked.

This time it’s Enzo and Cass coming in, just to make sure that everyone gets their turn in you see. That goes nowhere so the Hardys bridge the ladders between the ring and the apron but Cesaro and Sheamus slam them together. With a little too much Sheamus on offense, Cass launches Enzo over the ladders like a cannonball to take him down.

Back in and Sheamus hits the ten forearms to Gallows while Cesaro Swings Anderson. Despite what Cole thinks, that’s not exactly working together. We hear about the Tag Team Titles not changing hands at Wrestlemania in SIXTEEN YEARS (that’s inexcusable) until Sheamus Brogue Kicks the heck out of Cass. Enzo shoves the ladder over to drop Gallows and Sheamus and goes up, sending Graves into hysterics over the horrible possibilities.

Sheamus and Gallows come back in for the save but don’t bother to knock him off the ladder. Instead it’s Anderson climbing the ladder and knocking Cesaro into the ladder. There’s a Magic Killer to Cesaro but Matt hits them both with a Twist of Fate, including a big one off of the ladder to Anderson. Jeff hits the required Swanton off the ladder to drive Cesaro through a bridged ladder, leaving Matt to pull the titles down at 11:05.

Rating: C+. There’s only so much you can get out of a ladder match like this with almost nothing to it other than the big Hardys return. That being said, they absolutely got the ending right as there was no other way to go here. Enzo and Cass weren’t going to work after something as special as the Hardys showing up so don’t even try. There wasn’t much to this in the way of high spots either, but this was ALL about Matt and Jeff, as it should have been.

Jimmy Fallon is here.

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella, which is mostly about Nikki and Cena teaming together for the first time ever. The idea is that Cena won’t marry Nikki so Miz and Maryse are better, meaning we’re just waiting on Cena to pop the question here. In the show stealing moment of the year though, Miz and Maryse did some parody videos of Cena and Nikki and Total Divas/Bellas, giving us some of the funniest things WWE has ever done.

They nailed the ridiculous nature of the shows to perfection and made Miz look like the guy who should be ready to break through every ceiling above her. Oh and Maryse as Nikki Bella: sweet GOODNESS that worked on about a million levels. Finally though, a year later with Miz and Maryse now as parents, Cena’s jokes about Miz “firing blanks” are pretty much dead.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Nikki Bella/John Cena vs. Maryse/The Miz

Al Roker is guest ring announcer for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than having a celebrity appearance. This is Maryse’s first match nearly six years and she doesn’t look like she’s lost a step. Cena and Nikki run down the ramp and we see a wide shot for a cool visual. Cena’s mom is in the front row and he seems shocked to see her, which would be a heck of a surprise.

The women start and there’s no contact for a minute so let’s bring in the guys instead. Miz poses on the ropes and then bails to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Miz finally stomps away as we finally make contact nearly two minutes in. Maryse gets in a poke to the eye so Miz can fire off a left hand. Cena and Nikki have had no offense so far. The fans are very pleased with Miz’s beating of Cena, mainly because they realize how awesome those Total Bellas parodies were.

Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner but Maryse breaks up the hot tag attempt by pulling Nikki off the apron. A DDT gives Miz two and he slowly does Daniel Bryan’s pose (How amazing is it that the match could ACTUALLY HAPPEN?). The YES Kicks keep Cena rocked but Miz makes the mistake of telling Nikki that she can’t see him.

A big slap puts Miz on the floor and a diving tag brings in Nikki. Some bad forearms to Maryse’s arms (Shane could do better than that) don’t do much damage so Nikki runs Miz over instead. Back in and Nikki’s big forearm sets up stereo Five Knuckle Shuffles. The AA and a Rack Attack 2.0 give us a double pin at 9:38.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? Miz beat Cena up for about eight minutes and then it was hot tag Nikki to put the villains away Hogan style. After all the work and amazing promos, this is Miz’s Wrestlemania reward. I’m so glad this is what they went with instead of Cena vs. Undertaker, which was likely possible at this show. But hey, Total Divas and Total Bellas got a plot out of it.

Post match Cena says this is what Nikki wanted when she was rehabbing her neck. He tells a downright creepy story about Nikki being groggy before going inf or surgery. Apparently Cena asked if Nikki knew he would marry her one day. She said yes, and today is that day. Cena proposes and we get the big moment as she says yes. I’m SO glad this is what Cena, in the final few years that he has in WWE, is spending one of them doing this. It’s a sweet moment, but my goodness do this on Total Bellas where the fans want to see it.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. HHH, in another dumb story. So Rollins was HHH’s big ace in the hole a few years back and everything was all evil and great. Then Rollins tore his ACL and had to vacate the World Title, which HHH took as not being good enough to be the top guy. Let me repeat that: HHH said that leg issues were signs that someone wasn’t good enough to be the man in WWE. HHH then cost the returning Rollins the title to turn him face but now it’s time for revenge with a fired up Rollins wanting to burn the place down to destroy HHH.

Seth Rollins vs. HHH

Anything goes and, as usual, HHH gets the coolest entrance of the night with a big motorcycle and a police escort, plus Stephanie as a CRAZY HOT biker chick. Seriously, I know she can be irritating but she can rock the heck out of some leather pants. He gets the biggest entrance every year and it takes up a bunch of the spotlight but I can live with it if she’s in outfits like that.

Rollins’ entrance involves holding up a torch and touching it to the ground, sending digital flames down the ramp. I get the burn it down thing but it’s rather lame, along with coming after the really cool entrance. Well done again HHH, as he continues to be smarter than most wrestlers today.

They waste no time in slugging it out with Rollins getting the better of it (therefore I must remind you: HHH once won a slugout with modern day Brock Lesnar) to knock HHH outside. A dragon screw legwhip takes Rollins down by the knee that wasn’t hurt in the first place. Rollins shrugs it off and punches him away, followed by an enziguri back inside. The suicide dive sends HHH into the barricade and it’s already time for the announcers’ table. As usual, Rollins tries a Pedigree onto the table but gets countered with a DDT which doesn’t break the table.

HHH cranks up the violence with a chair to the knee before bridging Rollins’ knee between the ring and the table so he can drive his own knee into Rollins’. Back in and the slow knee work continues, because that’s how HHH loves to work on a show this big. Rollins tries the sunset bomb but hurts his knee all over again. It’s fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb and a hard whip sends HHH over the corner to the floor. With HHH staggered, Rollins goes up top (Graves: “He’s screwed if he hits this or not.”) and scores with a high crossbody to the floor.

Since it’s an anything goes match, Rollins loads up a pair of chairs and a table on the floor instead of just bashing HHH with the chair. A frog splash to the back keeps HHH down but he kicks the knee out to cut Rollins off again. HHH takes forever to get up top though and gets a chair pelted at his head, setting up the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. You know, on the bad knee.

Stephanie breaks up the Phoenix Splash by pulling the knee onto the ropes and we hit a reverse Figure Four. That’s reversed into a Gargano Escape of all things but HHH goes smart by punching him in the knee. The reverse Figure Four goes on outside so Rollins reaches underneath the ring to find weapons. Naturally this includes the sledgehammer but HHH lets the hold go.

Back in and Rollins’ knee is fine enough for a low superkick to the face, followed by an enziguri to really hammer the point home. Stephanie takes the hammer away from Rollins though and a Pedigree gives HHH two. The fans barely even reacted to that one and I can’t say I blame them.

HHH channels his inner CM Punk and loads up a super Pedigree but gets backdropped down (already done by Bayley earlier). Now the Phoenix Splash gets two but neither can hit a Pedigree. Instead HHH hits him in the knee but walks into a superkick, which knocks Stephanie off the apron and through a table. That wakes the fans WAY up just in time for the Pedigree to give Rollins the pin at 25:25.

Rating: B-. This is an interesting one I was bored out of my mind watching it live but it flies by watching it back. That being said, the constant knee work got very dull, especially when it wasn’t even Rollins’ bad knee. As usual, the Stephanie bump got by far the strongest reaction of the night because it’s something you don’t see very often. It’s not a bad match at all but you EASILY could have chopped off ten minutes and no one would have missed a thing.

Pitbull performs the theme song and eats up way too much time.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. Orton joined the Wyatt Family after becoming tired of being beaten down by the team. Then he won the Royal Rumble and promised to never cash in the title shot on new champion Wyatt. It wound up being a ruse though and Orton used his newfound access to the Wyatt Family compound to destroy the whole place. Then Bray poured Sister Abigail’s ashes over himself and gained her powers as this story got REALLY stupid. There was also something about Luke Harper nearly becoming #1 contender that went nowhere but warrants a quick mention.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and has a viper go down the ramp, which he himself called stupid. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton takes him down with a Thesz press and some right hands. They head to the floor for more right hands but Bray goes caveman with a running headbutt back inside. And then the lights go out (which I thought was a blackout) until the mat is covered with a projection of maggots. We’re about two minutes into the match and this is already in the pantheon of dumbest ideas ever.

Bray runs him over again and this time it’s worms on the mat. The referee jumps out of the ring, possibly because he wants to go work for a sensible company like TNA. A Rock Bottom into a backsplash gives Bray two but Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two. I mean, it doesn’t matter as they’ve completely lost the fans after that stupid, STUPID idea but never let that stop WWE.

They head outside again with Bray diving off the apron and straight into a dropkick. Sister Abigail into the barricade drops Orton again but he’s back up with an RKO to knock Bray silly on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker. Orton’s hanging DDT looks to set up the RKO but this time Sister Abigail connects for two. But hang on because let’s hit those roaches to complete the trio of stupid! Orton is finally done with all this nonsense and hits the RKO for the pin and the title at 10:13.

Rating: F. You are the winter, fall and spring. You are the sun that summertime brings. You are the stars in the nighttime sky. You are my girl and I’m your guy. You got me all tied up in knots and I’m lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m just lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m lovin’ you lots and lots.

That doesn’t make sense? Neither does what we just saw. Moving on.

The pilots from the flyover are here. That’s kind of cool.

We recap the Universal Title match, which all started because of a video game. Goldberg came back at Survivor Series to face Brock Lesnar in a rematch of the nightmare that was Wrestlemania XX. In a shocker, Goldberg won in about a minute and a half. Then it was decided that Goldberg could win the title again. He went on to eliminate Brock from the Royal Rumble and then won the Universal Title in about thirty seconds at Fastlane. Lesnar needed to defeat Goldberg once and for all so we’re having the match for the title tonight. This is all narrated by Paul Heyman, who talks about fantasies coming to an end in a nice touch.

Here’s the thing: you could do this same story without the title. Have Lesnar put up his career to get one more shot at Goldberg (it’s not like there was any doubt on the winner here anyway) so let us have the original plan: Owens dropping the title to Jericho (who never won the World Title as a face) and then Lesnar winning it the next month. Nah. We need GOLDBERG winning the title in a nostalgia moment for whatever reason.

Universal Title: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Goldberg is defending and gets the long walk to the ring which might as well be the long walk to the gallows. Lesnar wastes no time and hits three German suplexes in nineteen seconds. In a great visual, the camera is on Lesnar when Goldberg cuts him down with a spear. A second spear sends Lesnar bailing and the third spear takes Lesnar through the barricade. That’s the first MINUTE of this match as they’re certainly starting fast.

Back in and both finishers are escaped, setting up another spear to Lesnar. The Jackhammer gets two, making Lesnar the second person to ever kick out (the other being Hogan, who only did it because of a missed cue). That means another spear (Heyman: “HE’S IN POSITION AGAIN!”) but this time Lesnar leapfrogs him and Goldberg hits the buckles. More suplexes (make it ten total) set up the F5 to officially conquer Goldberg at 4:47.

Rating: B. This was PERFECT for what they had to work with. Goldberg wasn’t going to be out there for a long match (he didn’t in his prime either) and they went with the right path. This was as action packed of a nearly five minute match as all you could have done. That first spear looked awesome and Goldberg gets to go out on his big moment. I’m pleased, though not as much as Goldberg, who probably made a ton of money for less than ten minutes combined of wrestling time in his comeback.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Alexa is defending and this is the most thrown together match that I can remember in a good while. They’re also rushing through the entrances due to the time issues. You know, because NOW they care about time issues. Naomi is the hometown girl and MY GOODNESS the Glow entrance is a sight to behold in a stadium. There are no tags of course so it’s a big brawl to start.

Naomi gets sent to the floor for a double suplex from Natalya and Carmella. Back in and Becky kicks the two of them down but James Ellsworth (Remember that?) grabs Becky’s foot to take over. Bliss breaks up a cover and screams at Carmella to get out of her ring. The DDT gets two on Natalya but Becky breaks it up this time, only to have Ellsworth come in. No Chin Music is countered into a Bexploder and it’s Naomi coming back in this time.

Naomi slingshots in to sunset flip Natalya, who German suplexes Becky at the same time. Speaking of the same time, Natalya tries a double Sharpshooter on Carmella and Naomi but can’t get the legs up. Well, not surprising, but it’s so bad that the camera cuts to her back. Naomi comes back in for a Rear View to Bliss and a big dive to take everyone out. Back in and Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn makes Bliss tap for the title at 5:33.

Rating: D. The timing issues KILLED this and there’s no way around it. Much like the ladder match earlier, there’s nothing you can do when you have five minutes and six people in a match. Naomi winning the title back is cool, but I still have no idea why her winning it back in her hometown is supposed to be some huge deal. Yeah it’s cool, but it’s not like this is some great moment.

Wrestlemania XXXIV is in New Orleans. Those songs will drive you crazy by the end of the weekend.

New Day comes out to thank the fans for the record attendance of 75,245. The team is still funny but egads they could have been cut out of this whole thing and not been missed.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker. Reigns eliminated him from the Rumble and now we have a match to determine who is the real Big Dog.

Jim Ross is out to do commentary for the main event. That’s even more impressive when you consider his wife died days before this show.

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

No holds barred, first announced before the entrances. Reigns is booed out of the stadium, as has become a custom. In a smart move, Undertaker rises from the middle of the ramp (with a cool visual of smoke building up and clearing to reveal him standing there). I completely missed this as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring and saw him climbing the steps.

Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and knocks Reigns to the floor. Back in and Reigns knocks him over the top as well, with Undertaker landing on his feet. Reigns hammers him down to take over and they head outside so this can be more of a brawl, which is the only way to go. The apron dropkick (to a standing Undertaker) puts Undertaker down again but he wins a slugout back inside. Reigns hits him in the face and Undertaker just looks mad.

Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the legdrop for two. The threat of a chokeslam sends Reigns outside again and this time the apron dropkick is punched out of the air. Another dropkick staggers Undertaker but it’s a chokeslam onto the announcers’ table. They climb onto the other tables and it’s a spear to drive Undertaker through (almost in a running spinebuster) for the double knockout.

Reigns is the only one back in….and Undertaker sits up. Back in and Reigns does the corner clotheslines into the corner right hands, meaning the Last Ride (an AWFUL one at that with little impact and more Undertaker dropping Reigns than slamming him down). It’s chair time but Undertaker takes it away and beats him down instead. A quick Superman Punch knocks Undertaker into the ropes but another is countered into a chokeslam onto the chair.

The Tombstone gets two and the fans, who are supposed to be smart at Wrestlemania, seem shocked at the kickout. Off the first Tombstone. In a Wrestlemania match. Who’s the smart one here? Another Tombstone is loaded up but this time Reigns backflips….and just can’t lift Undertaker for the counter. They try a few more times but just stop for the sake of embarrassment with Reigns trying a Superman Punch instead.

The spear connects but Undertaker is fine enough to put on Hell’s Gate. The rope is reached for a break (erg) and Reigns unloads with the chair. Another spear gets another two and another spear gets another two and another Superman Punch (Undertaker sits up and falls over) sets up another spear to give Undertaker his second Wrestlemania loss at 22:57. That last sequence took nearly five minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s not terrible, but Undertaker looked like an old man who should have hung it up a few years ago. The problem here was the crowd being completely dead and it showed really badly. There’s only so much energy you can have in an academic match at the end of a seven hour show. Reigns winning makes complete sense but it was a bad match (the botches and CRAZY amount of time spent standing around didn’t do it any favors) and there’s no way around that.

Reigns gets the big pyro display behind him as he stands on the ramp (great shot) but we’re not done yet. Undertaker slowly sits up and we go to a bunch of replays. Back to live and it’s Undertaker standing in the ring with the hat and coat on. I use that term loosely as it looks like Mark Callaway standing there dressed as Undertaker. For the first time, it seems like we’re seeing the real person instead of the character, which is a MAJOR change for him.

He looks around to the crowd, takes off his gloves, coat and hat and folds them up in the ring. With the fans applauding, he goes outside, kisses Michelle McCool, and walks up the ramp. Undertaker stops, looks back one more time, raises the fist, and lowers down through the ramp, fist still in the air, to end the show with the gong sounding one more time. There was no commentary for the last ten minutes, without even a goodbye (appropriate here).

That’s about as perfect of a sendoff as WWE has ever done. It was emotional, it felt special, and it came off like the real thing. Undertaker is the last vestige of that older generation and him breaking character for the first time ever and leaving is incredible to see. It’s why I don’t want to see him wrestle again and why it makes me sad to think that he will. Incredible stuff, and Thank You Taker.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s no way around it: this show is way way way way way way way WAY too long. I got through an hour of the show a few days back (you know I’m not watching this in one sitting) and looked down at the bar in near horror of how little space I had covered. Five hours, plus TWO HOURS of a Kickoff Show is just too much, especially when there’s stuff to be cut. What could be cut? Well off the top of my head:

AJ vs. Shane (move AJ to ANYTHING else and drop Shane) entirely or at least cut it down by about eight minutes

Corbin vs. Ambrose (I know it’s the Intercontinental Title but on a show this huge, it’s understandable)

Smackdown Women’s Title (it’s just nothing and felt like total filler)

Five to ten minutes each off of Reigns vs. Undertaker and HHH vs. Rollins (those combine for nearly fifty minutes total)

Pitbull

AT LEAST get this down to four and a half hours of main show. That can’t be too much to ask, right?

Other than the timing issues though, the show is mostly solid. There’s a ton of good stuff up until the mixed tag and then things start to fall apart. The Universal Title match was as perfect as it was going to be get but there’s just so much bad around it (Bray vs. Orton, Reigns vs. Undertaker, HHH vs. Rollins in that match that is still going on somewhere, with HHH still working the knee) that the good is dragged down.

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the timing issues as there’s almost no way to make a show this long work. It’s too much to sit through and it becomes a chore at the end. Just cut this down by a good hour (or two) and things are much better, but bigger is better for WWE and that’s not changing anytime soon. As it is, the show works more than it misses but it’s still not a classic by any means.

Ratings Comparison

Neville vs. Austin Aries

Original: A-

2018 Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

2018 Redo: C-

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Original: C-

2018 Redo: D

Hardy Boyz vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. The Miz/Maryse

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Original: F

2018 Redo: F

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Original: D-

2018 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Yeah I overrated a lot of this the first time around. It’s good, but not that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/04/07/wrestlemania-xxxiii-a-long-wait-for-a-long-show-with-a-long-ramp/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips
America the Beautiful: Tinashe

I was in the stadium for the show so this is my second time seeing it. My seat was in the upper deck and I had the hard cameras opposite me with the set (amazing visual which looked even better at night) on my right, basically in line with the upper right hand corner of the ring. This presented a bit of an issue as you could see two of the screens above the ring, meaning I was looking at most of one screen and the right side of another. In other words, when New Day was out for example and standing Woods, Big E. and Kofi, I was seeing Kofi, Woods, Big E., and Kofi again. That took some getting used to.

The ramp is HUGE, apparently running eighty yards and coming down from what would have been the second deck of stands.

Pre-Show: Austin Aries vs. Neville

We take a break and come back with Neville holding a chinlock, as is the common action when coming back for some reason. Neville takes too long yelling at the fans and misses a Phoenix splash, allowing Aries to hit the big ax handle to the floor. Another kick to the face stops Aries but he shoves the superplex away.

Pre-Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Only Big Show and Braun Strowman get introductions. We see Rob Gronkowski in the front row, just in case you wanted to have some drama about the ending. Braun tosses Primo at the bell and Kalisto goes out a few seconds later. What in the world happened to him? Gotch and Slater are gone, followed by Jey Uso and Goldust. Everyone has been put out by Big Show and Strowman so far to really hammer the idea home.

That makes sense though as you have to get rid of a bunch of the dead weight in this thing. Ziggler is sent to the apron for a second time but hangs on again and manages to backdrop Truth out. Rhyno follows him to the floor and Mahal puts Ziggler on the apron again to no avail. American Alpha dumps English, Axel and Jimmy Uso as the ring is rapidly clearing out.

Mojo finally gets rid of Ziggler and Titus kicks Harper out (Huh?) to get us down to five. Sami clotheslines Titus to the floor but gets dumped by Dain to suck the life out of the crowd. Mahal is down in the corner so we get Mojo vs. Dain, which sounds a lot more interesting than I was expecting. A tackle actually drops the monster but Mahal sends Mojo through the ropes to the floor.

Gronkowski gets in and runs Mahal over and Rawley hits the running right hand to Dain, setting up a clean elimination. Mahal gets sent to the apron and eventually the running fist gives Mojo the win at 14:08. I was legitimately scared they were going to give it to Mahal at the end so well done on the fake out.

Rating: D. Yeah it was boring (and flat out bad at times) but it was on the pre-show and we got a good choice for the winner (and not just because I picked Rawley for the win). This is the kind of match where you can give someone a rub without damaging anyone else so if it bombs, no one loses anything as a result. The Gronkowski stuff was harmless (and gave me a good laugh with the referees having to get rid of security) and Rawley is going to energize the crowd. Also, what the heck happened to Strowman? He goes from a potential main eventer to this in a month? Really?

Pre-Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose charges right at him and gets dropped twice in a row. Corbin tries his slide underneath the bottom rope and gets taken down by a suicide dive. Back in and Dean is sent ribs/back first into the post as the beatdown begins. We get another audio break with no video break and come back (I think?) with Corbin working on the ribs. A choke shove (stop stealing from Alexa Bliss) drops Ambrose for two and Baron sends him into the barricade to vent some frustration.

Back in and we hit the chinlock with Dean looking more bored than in pain. Corbin is sent shoulder first into the post but the top rope elbow is partially blocked. Dirty Deeds is fully blocked but Corbin is sent outside. Dean sends him into the steps and now the top rope elbow connects. Back in and Deep Six gets two on the champ, only to have the rebound lariat put Corbin down as well. Corbin gets up first and starts talking trash, only to take too much time with End of Days, allowing Ambrose to grab Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:54.

The opening video focuses on the Ultimate Thrill Ride concept with a camera going down a roller coaster. Almost everyone on the card is seen at one point. All of the usual suspects were booed out of the building, though Miz and Maryse got one heck of a pop. Lesnar received a mixed reaction, which could make for one heck of an interesting Raw World Title match.

AJ Styles vs. Shane McMahon

AJ reverses that into a one leg/arm Styles Clash for two (because that move is worthless anymore) and both guys are spent. A slugout goes to Shane but the referee gets bumped, allowing AJ to go and grab a trashcan. As luck would have it he loads up Shane for the Coast to Coast, which is broken up by Shane using the can to knock him out of the air.

US Title: Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Charlotte goes right after Nia with Sasha and Bayley helping, only to have the monster shrug them all off. Sasha and Bayley get splashed in the corner, leaving Charlotte to chop away at Nia. With Bayley and Sasha on the floor, Nia throws Charlotte onto them and everyone is down. Back in and everyone goes after Nia at the same time, including a big boot into a double belly to back suplex for two.

Charlotte bails to the floor and tells the two of them to fight, only to pull Bayley to the floor so Sasha can score with a flip dive. Charlotte busts out the corkscrew dive and hits it PERFECTLY for a change, which is an incredibly rare sight. Back in and Natural Selection is countered the Bank Statement but Charlotte slips out again.

The Hall of Fame Class of 2017 is presented:

Diamond Dallas Page (LONG overdue for what he did after retirement if nothing else)

Rock N Roll Express (Even longer overdue)

Teddy Long (One of the most versatile performers ever)

Beth Phoenix (Good worker in a bad era)

Kurt Angle (One of the best of all time and easily deserving of the headlining spot)

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Anderson and Gallows

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Hardy Boyz

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella. This is built around the idea of Miz and Maryse being a real couple and Cena/Bella being a robotic couple who are only there for the cameras. Cena and Nikki finally started acknowledging their relationship on TV and a mixed tag was set, which set up some hilarious parodies of Total Bellas with Miz and Maryse impersonating Cena and Nikki.

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. Miz/Maryse

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Anything goes. In his annual over the top entrance, HHH comes out on a three wheeled motorcycle flanked by police motorcycles. This is completely redeemed by Stephanie as biker girl in leather pants. I know she gets on my nerves a lot but my goodness she looks great here. Seth has a torch for some reason, which I guess symbolizes burning the place down. Rollins kicks him to the floor to start but a dragon screw legwhip to the good knee takes Rollins down.

HHH throws him in the reverse Figure Four which put Rollins out for weeks but Rollins reverses into a modified Crossface. That goes nowhere so HHH chairs the knee again and puts the hold on outside. Rollins tries to go underneath the ring to find whatever he can, including a sledgehammer which he throws to HHH for reasons of general stupidity. They head back inside with Rollins not only being able to stand but also being able to win a slugout.

That one spot COMPLETELY woke the crowd up after this long match had sucked the life out of them and shows what happens when you finally give the fans the comeuppance that a villain has earned (granted it might be nice if it happened more than once a year but you take what you can get with Stephanie). Rollins hits the Pedigree for the pin at 25:25.

Rating: C+. Major knee issues aside, this was actually much, much easier to sit through on a second viewing. It was a horribly boring match live and I was checking out reaction to the show instead of paying attention to the match. This viewing felt like the time was cut in half and I never really got bored.

Pitbull and company perform. You could actually see the fans stand up almost in unison and head for the concourse.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

The pilots from the fly over are here.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

The Jackhammer only gets two (I believe Hogan is the only other person to kick out of that, which I think was due to Nash missing his cue) and you can see the life come back into Heyman. Goldberg loads up another spear but Lesnar leapfrogs him, sending Goldberg into the buckle. Seven more German suplexes (for the sake of the Tye Dillinger TEN from the crowd) sets up an F5 to give Lesnar the title back at 4:47.

Naomi and Carmella are put in a double Sharpshooter which falls apart before Natalya can even turn it over. The MickDT gets two on Becky and Mickie runs into a superkick (literally, as in she was out of range and had to move forward). Naomi clears the ring and hits the Rear View on Bliss before diving onto everyone else. Back in and Bliss punches Naomi out of the air, only to get caught in a weird submission (kind of a reverse Crossface actually) to give Naomi the title at 5:33.

New Day announces the attendance record of 75,245. Again, I forgot they were a part of this show.

We recap Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns. This is your pretty standard story: Undertaker is the old guard and Reigns is the new young star who thinks this is his yard. I know you hear this kind of story with Undertaker a lot but it really did feel different this time around.

Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker

This is announced as no holds barred, which is a new stipulation. In a very smart idea, Undertaker rises out of the middle of the ramp instead of walking all the way down. I completely missed that as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring as he was getting in. No matter how old he is, that entrance is still chilling live.

Undertaker starts fast and knocks Reigns to the floor and says this is still his yard. Back in and Reigns scores with a right hand before sending Undertaker over the top and right onto his feet. Reigns goes into the steps, only to come back with a Samoan drop to put Undertaker down. They head outside again with Undertaker popping him in the jaw to cut off the momentum, which makes sense from someone billed as a great striker. They head back inside again with the Snake Eyes into the big boot dropping Reigns for two.

Reigns poses in front of the big fireworks display in what would normally end the show.

He takes off the gloves (just like last year), the coat and finally, with a heavy sigh, the hat, leaving all of them in a pile on the mat. Undertaker finally leaves the ring, kisses Michelle McCool in the front row, and walks up the stage to the riser that brought him up for his entrance. With one last look back (and what appear to be tears), Undertaker raises his fist one last time as he descends to the gong sounding and THANK YOU TAKER CHANTS.

Results

AJ Styles b. Shane McMahon – Phenomenal Forearm

Kevin Owens b. Chris Jericho – Apron powerbomb

Bayley b. Nia Jax, Sasha Banks and Charlotte – Top rope elbow to Charlotte

Hardy Boyz b. Anderson and Gallows, Sheamus/Cesaro and Enzo Amore/Big Cass – Matt pulled down the titles

John Cena/Nikki Bella b. Miz/Maryse – AA to Miz and Rack Attack 2.0 to Maryse

Seth Rollins b. HHH – Pedigree

Randy Orton b. Bray Wyatt – RKO

Brock Lesnar b. Goldberg – F5

Naomi b. Carmella, Alexa Bliss, Mickie James, Becky Lynch and Natalya – Arm trap submission to Bliss

Roman Reigns b. Undertaker – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Takeover: New York
Date: April 5, 2019
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson

We’re finally in the big city for what might be the best show of the weekend (I’m looking at you ROH/G1. Impress me.) with a new NXT Champion guaranteed in the main event. Other than that we have all title matches up and down the card with the United Kingdom Title on the line as well. I guess I can deal with this if I have to. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look at the history of Takeovers (and Arrival) before getting to tonight’s card. The history was rather quick and that’s fine in something like this.

Tag Team Titles: War Raiders vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet

The Raiders are defending and come out with vikings beating on drums because they’re awesome that way. Ricochet and Black won the Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic to get the shot. Black and Rowe start things off and they actually go technical with Rowe taking him down but not throwing a right hand at a downed opponent. Back up and Black puts his foot on the side of Rowe’s head as the mind games continue. They bump fists and it’s off to Hanson vs. Ricochet, much to the fans’ delight.

Ricochet goes with the speed and sends Hanson outside, leaving Rowe to take a dropkick. Black moonsaults to the middle and has a seat next to Ricochet as the NXT chants go up again. Back in and the pace quickens with Hanson sitting on Ricochet’s chest in the corner, setting up a slam to drop Rowe onto him again. With Ricochet mostly crushed, Rowe starts in on Black’s arm but the second tandem slam is cut off with a legsweep.

Ricochet already comes back in for a kick to the head and a springboard clothesline drops Rowe. Black’s elbow to the face gets one and we hit a seated abdominal stretch as the fans go nuts over something in the crowd. They chant YOU DESERVE IT until Rowe fights up and throws Black down with a slam. Hanson comes in to clean house, including the running clotheslines in the corner. Ricochet has had it with the beating and FALL AWAY SLAMS HANSON for your WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT/MAMA MIA spot.

Black and Rowe slug it out with Black kicking him in the head but getting kneed out of the air. A knee strike of his own sets up a heck of a German suplex for two on Rowe and the fans get to breathe while applauding. Hanson and Ricochet come back in for a flip off until Ricochet scores with his own kick to the head. That’s fine with Hanson, who hits a Tajiri handspring elbow (he shouldn’t be able to do that) for his own near fall. Ricochet knocks him off the top but it’s a blind tag, allowing Rowe to knee him into the corner.

Rowe throws Hanson into Ricochet in the corner and it’s a springboard clothesline/German suplex combination for two more with Black coming off the top with a double stomp for the save. Hanson gets sent outside and moonsaulted by Black, who takes a suicide dive from Rowe (whose feet got a little caught on the ropes). Ricochet busts out a corkscrew Space Flying Tiger Drop but it’s Hanson with a Cannonball off the top because it’s ok if he kills everyone.

Ricochet and Rowe dive back in to break up the count and it’s Black coming in as well. Rowe growls at him and takes a sweet Black Mass, knocking him silly. The 630 connects but Hanson shoves Black onto the cover for the save. Another 630 misses and Hanson blasts Black with a clothesline on the floor. Back in and Thor’s Hammer hits Ricochet and Hanson suicide dives onto Black. Fallout to Ricochet retains the titles at 18:39.

Rating: A. Yeah that was incredible and an instant classic with all four doing things that shouldn’t be humanly possible. Hanson alone is an athletic freak and their power moves are more than enough to carry them as far as they need to go. Ricochet and Black are going to be fine as they have solid chemistry, though Black still seems more like a singles star. Anyway, outstanding opener as the bar has been set.

Post match, hands are shaken and Black/Ricochet get the big sendoff to the main roster. Well they certainly deserve that.

Piper Niven and Toni Storm are here.

We recap Velveteen Dream vs. Matt Riddle. Dream finally won the big one by winning the North American Title back in February but Riddle showed up to get a better look at the belt. Dream didn’t like someone taking his spotlight and the match was made.

North American Title: Matt Riddle vs. Velveteen Dream

Dream is defending. Riddle comes out in a pinstripe jacket and Dream…..is the Statue of Liberty, sitting on a throne carried by four men ala Macho King Randy Savage. There certainly are some similarities. The fans are split (of course) and Dream doesn’t like that posing on the corner. Riddle starts kicking at the knee and Dream is completely dominated when he tries to take it to the mat. A springboard armdrag into an armbar has Dream bailing to the ropes as the champ is in early trouble.

They go to a back to back test of strength until Riddle flips over him and reverses a monkey flip into a cross armbreaker. That’s broken up as well so Dream gets smart by stomping on the bare foot. Dream gyrates the hips and gets gutwrench suplexed for his efforts. Riddle picks him up again and gyrates his own hips, allowing Dream to get out and hit a dropkick. With Riddle outside Dream tries a dive but lands in a German suplex on the floor. Back in and Riddle sends him flying with an exploder suplex but it’s too early for the Bromission.

The threat of an armbar sends Dream bailing to the ropes for the break and he’s right back up with a release German suplex. Riddle doesn’t sell German suplexes though and it’s a jumping knee into a fisherman’s buster for his latest near fall. Some forearms in the ropes show some frustration from Riddle so he counters what looked to be a powerbomb into a triangle. With that broken up, a GTS into a German suplex gives Riddle two. Kicks and knees to the chest make Dream HULK UP, meaning it’s a big boot and clothesline to the floor.

There’s the ax handle as we get both sides of the Mega Powers. Dream hits a Fameasser but dives into a jumping knee. A Codebreaker of all things gives Dream two but his running knee is countered into an ankle lock. Riddle switches feet to block Dream kicking him in the face but Dream is right back with a superkick. The wind up DDT sets up the Dream Valley Driver and Dream goes up.

The Purple Rainmaker is countered into most of the Bromission, sending Dream bailing to the ropes. Riddle takes him into the corner for a release German superplex into a corkscrew Swanton for a crazy hot near fall. A superkick doesn’t work for Dream as Riddle knees him into the Bromission but Dream flips back over for the pin at 17:33.

Rating: A. Well those were some of the best near falls I’ve ever seen and they actually got me on the finish. Riddle teasing the heel side during the match because his athleticism couldn’t get around Dream’s creativity and unorthodox style. This was an incredible match and the kind of match that Dream needed to win to really establish himself. I’m surprised that Riddle got pinned so soon, but he didn’t lose much at all from this. Great match as Dream steals another show.

More respect is shown post match.

Earlier today, Kushida signed with NXT and he’s in the crowd here.

We recap Pete Dunne vs. Walter for the United Kingdom Title. Dunne has held the title for nearly two years and is out of big challengers so Walter, a rather large man, is here to give him the fight of his reign. This should be amazing.

United Kingdom Title: Pete Dunne vs. Walter

Vic Joseph replaces Watson on commentary and Dunne is defending. Feeling out process to start with Dunne not being sure what to do with someone this size. Walter tries a choke but Dunne goes to the fingers to escape and even avoids a chop. Another chop misses and Walter tells Dunne to bring it. The champ gets slammed down into an armbar and now the chops start connecting, with Dunne looking a bit scared. Back up and a big boot keeps Dunne in trouble as Walter lays him on the top rope.

In a scary sight, Walter climbs the ropes as well and stands on Dunne’s throat as it’s one sided so far. They go back inside with Walter chopping his way out of a leglock and putting on a Boston crab. Dunne makes a rope and goes for the finger again so Walter boots him in the face to the floor. Back in and Dunne goes with the kicks to the head, allowing Dunne to moonsault onto the big man. For a change of pace, Dunne goes up top and, after bending the finger again, hits a slow motion sunset sitout powerbomb for two.

A top rope double stomp to the floor has Walter in more trouble but they’re right back inside. Dunne tries a moonsault over him but slips, allowing Walter to shotgun dropkick him down. Walter’s powerbomb, with Walter coming off the mat for the cover, gets two and they’re both a little spent. Walter chops him and gets slapped in the face, earning him another chop and a kick to the face. Dunne is picked back up but gets pushed back down in a test of strength for another stomp.

Another powerbomb is countered with an enziguri and they’re both down with the fans applauding. Dunne heads up top with his back to the ring, meaning Walter is right back up with a sleeper superplex (Who does that?) for two more. Somehow Dunne is alive and snaps both fingers, setting up a crucifix bomb for two. The fans are split as Dunne stomps at the side of Walter’s head so Walter kicks right back while still on the mat. Dunne has to flip out of a sleeper and kicks at the head even more.

Dunne traps both arms with the legs and bends the fingers back (FREAKING OW MAN!) but Walter gets a foot on the rope. A heck of a clothesline knocks Dunne off the top but Walter’s splash is countered into an attempted finger snap. That’s broken up with raw power though and Dunne is down again. Dunne won’t let go of the hand, even as Walter stomps him in the head.

A huge lariat breaks the grip but Dunne nails one of his own and hits the Bitter End for another two. They go to different ropes and pull themselves up because it’s time to slug it out. Dunne absorbs the chops so Walter kicks him in the head for no cover, sending Nigel into a near fit. Walter goes up top but Dunne is up again and tries a triangle. That’s reversed into a super jackknife bu Walter STILL doesn’t cover. A top rope splash FINALLY finishes Dunne at 25:30.

Rating: A. I need a nap. That was one of the hardest hitting fights I’ve ever seen with both guys beating the fire out of each other as only they could. The fingers and chops were used a bit too much but my goodness what more could you want? They had to take the title off of Dunne eventually and this was the only way that it could have gone. Walter is one of the few guys who could conceivably beat him and they just happened to get there in another classic.

Edge and Beth Phoenix are here.

We recap the women’s Title match. Shayna Baszler is out of one on one challengers so it’s Kairi Sane, Io Shirai and Bianca Belair at the same time. Belair’s “being undefeated is a mindset” promo still makes my head hurt.

Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Io Shirai vs. Kairi Sane vs. Shayna Baszler

Shayna is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Shirai and Sane are sent outside early on and it’s Belair having to flip out of Baszler’s Kirifuda Clutch. Back in and everyone goes after Baszler as Sane and Shirai start teaming up. As expected, they’re left alone and have to fight each other but Shirai flips out of a headscissors. Shayna and Bianca take their places and it’s Baszler grabbing the hair, only to have Belair pull her face first into the post. A running elbow gives Sane two on Belair and it’s a baseball slide to Baszler.

Shirai springboard missile dropkicks Belair but walks into a fall away slam. Baszler is back in to clean house and load up a gutwrench superplex on Belair, which is turned into the Tower of Doom (you knew that was coming). Shirai launches Sane over the ropes onto Belair and Baszler, followed by the middle rope moonsault for a bonus. Back in and Belair gets caught between Shirai and Sane until Baszler pulls Sane outside. That means a gorilla press to send Sane onto both of them, leaving Baszler to come back in.

The double chickenwing slam is countered into the Kirifuda Clutch but Belair powers back up for the KOD. Shirai dives in for the save and hits an X Factor. Back to back moonsaults hit Baszler for two with Sane making the save. That gives us Shirai vs. Sane with Shirai being slammed onto Baszler. The Insane Elbow hits Baszler with Shirai DIVING back in for what might have been a late save. Belair catches Sane on top and hits a double KOD on Sane and Shirai but it’s Baszler coming back in to kick Belair down. The Kirifuda Clutch makes Belair tap at 15:30.

Rating: B. Thank goodness as Belair was getting way too close to winning and I can’t handle hearing that many of her inane promos. Baszler winning is interesting because who is left to beat her? Candice LeRae would make the most sense, but that seems like a long way off. Maybe we’ll get there someday, but Baszler is going to need something to bridge that gap. Anyway, easily the worst match of the night and it was quite good.

We recap the main event, with the original plan of Tommaso Ciampa defending the NXT Title against Johnny Gargano being shelved because Ciampa needed neck surgery. Therefore, Adam Cole won a five way match, earning himself the spot in the title match against Gargano in a 2/3 falls match.

NXT Title: Adam Cole vs. Johnny Gargano

The title is vacant coming in and it’s 2/3 falls. Cole sends the Undisputed Era to the back so he can do this on his own. The fans are behind Cole and it’s off to the mat about a minute and a half in. Gargano works on a hammerlock but gets reversed into a headlock. Back up and it’s an armdrag into an armbar to to keep Cole in trouble. That’s broken up and Cole bails to the floor where he manages to catch Gargano with a jumping enziguri. A hard knee to the face rocks Gargano and we hit a chinlock.

Gargano fights up again so Cole pulls him right back down into a dragon sleeper. That’s broken up too and it’s a double crossbody for a double knockdown. They bring it up another gear with Gargano nailing a belly to belly, setting up the rolling kick to the head. The slingshot spear gets two and a tornado Downward Spiral is good for the same. Cole is right back with the Backstabber out of the corner for two of his own. They fight over a small package and it’s Cole up first with a jumping enziguri. Another exchange of rollups goes nowhere so Cole hits the Last Shot for the first fall at 13:54.

The second fall begins and it’s a German suplex into another Last Shot for a very close two. Gargano spears him to the floor but walks into the fireman’s carry backbreaker. Back up and Cole can’t get a superbomb so Johnny reverses into a super White Noise (Ciampa move) for two of his own. With that not working, Gargano hits a slingshot DDT onto the apron but breaks the count, allowing Cole to post him twice in a row. Back in and Johnny grabs the flipping armbar (Ciampa move) before switching over to the Gargano Escape for a very fast tap and the tie at 20:52.

We pause for a second as Gargano has a cut on his head but it’s not a bad one. Gargano’s discus lariat sets up a swinging kick to the head but the brainbuster to the knee gives Cole two. The Lawn Dart sends Cole into the middle buckle for two so it’s double enziguris and double superkicks for a double knockdown. Cole is up first with a straitjacket suplex but Gargano is back with a reverse hurricanrana. The low superkick sends Cole outside and Gargano is crushed again. He goes out to get him and it’s a wheelbarrow suplex into the apron to put Gargano down again.

Back in and Gargano’s slingshot spear is blocked with a superkick, setting up Cole’s middle rope Canadian Destroyer for a very close two and the fans are losing it again. Gargano rolls outside and Cole tells him that he fails so Gargano throws him over the announcers’ table. The table is cleared out but Cole hits a Fairy Tale Ending onto (not through) the table instead. Cole wants the countout so Johnny dives back in at nine, right into a low superkick for another near fall.

The next Canadian Destroyer is countered into the Gargano Escape and here’s Roderick Strong for a distraction. Kyle O’Reilly breaks the hold as Cole is tapping and the referee goes down. High/Low from Fish and O’Reilly gets an even closer two so Gargano backdrops Cole onto all three of them. The Era gets beaten up on the floor but it’s two more superkicks into the Last Shot from Cole….for two. Another Last Shot misses and the Gargano Escape makes Cole tap for the title at 38:15.

Rating: A-. Yeah it worked and while it needed to be Ciampa, this was the best ending they could have had given what they had. Gargano FINALLY overcoming the odds to win the title was the feel good ending that the show needed, especially with Gargano defeating the entire Era to win. Some of the near falls were a bit much and there were a few too many superkicks, but they nailed the ending and that’s what mattered most.

Candice comes out to celebrate and they go into the crowd to hug their parents. They walk to the stage….and it’s Tommaso Ciampa….to hug both of them to end the show.

Overall Rating: A+. Oh like it could be anything else. Those first three matches are as great of a three match stretch as you’ll find and that’s more than enough to carry whatever else was on the show. It got the big ending, the various classics and absolutely nothing close to bad. What else can you get out of a three hour and fifteen minute show? Another incredible show and that’s just what you get from these shows.

Results

War Raiders b. Ricochet/Aleister Black – Fallout to Ricochet

Velveteen Dream b. Matt Riddle – Rollup

Walter b. Pete Dunne – Top rope splash

Shayna Baszler b. Bianca Belair, Io Shirai and Kairi Sane – Kirifuda Clutch to Belair

Johnny Gargano b. Adam Cole – Gargano Escape

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Rev Pro: New York
Date: April 5, 2019
Location: New York Hilton Midtown, New York City, New York
Commentators: Andy Boy Simmonz, Kevin Kelly

I’ve seen these guys twice live and had a good time with each of the shows so this was a must for the list. I don’t really follow their stories all that closely but I know enough of the names to keep up. This show will have a mixture of British wrestling and New Japan so it’s going to be quite the combination. Let’s get to it.

Kelly welcomes us to the show and says we’ll be ready to go in just a bit. Fifteen minutes later we’re ready to go.

Owner Andy Quildan welcomes us to the show and says part of the delay was wrestlers at the merch tables (fair enough). We get the traditional requests for the cheering but no “London says they’re louder than you”.

Karl Fredericks/Clark Conners vs. CCK

That would two Young Lions from the New Japan Los Angeles dojo vs. Jonathan Gresham/Chris Brookes. Clark and Gresham go straight to the mat and it’s actually a standoff, which you wouldn’t expect against Gresham. A chop off goes to Conners and the bigger Fredericks comes in to shove Gresham into the corner. Brookes comes in and gets taken down by the smaller Fredericks, as the Young Lions are certainly good on the mat.

Fredericks powers him into the corner and it’s a double leglock from the Lions, drawing Gresham in for a save. Speaking of Gresham, he comes in off a blind tag and catches Conners in a German suplex. Brookes comes back in and slaps on a leglock with Fredericks picking Gresham up and throwing him away to make a save. A dropkick to Gresham’s leg gives us a double knockdown and everything breaks down. Stereo Boston crabs from the Lions are broken up with some kicks from Brookes and we hit the ten minute mark.

Fredericks throws Conners into Brookes and it’s another chop off to put Brookes in trouble. A Jay Driller with Gresham adding a kick to the head gets….two with Conners shoving Clark into the cover for the save. I thought that was it. Clark and Gresham forearm it out until an enziguri into a standing Lionsault has Clark rocked. The ankle lock goes on with Gresham pulling him up into a bridging German suplex for two more. Gresham has had it and it’s a discus forearm….for two more with Gresham being shocked. A spinning kick to the head knocks Conners silly for the pin at 13:35.

Rating: B. Considering that the Lions are trainees, this was a heck of a fight with the rookies more than holding their own here. I had a good time watching it and that’s more than you expect when one of the teams is told to use a limited moveset. Very good opener and far better than I was expecting.

Carlos Romo vs. A-Kid vs. Kid Lykos vs. Flamita

I’m only familiar with Flamita so this is going to be all over the place. Kid and Romo are a regular team called Team Whitewolf. Flamita and Lykos chop away in the corner with Lykos missing a 619 in the corner but snapping off a headscissors. They switch out with the other two but Kid is thrown outside onto Romo, meaning it’s a flip dive from Lykos.

Another one from Flamita takes everyone down but Flamita stops for some posing. Back in and Kid fisherman suplexes Flamita for two, leaving himself open for a kick to the face from Lykos. A split legged moonsault gives Lykos two of his own and a 619 takes Kid to the floor. Romo adds a moonsault but gets caught with a 619 and Backstabber from Flamita. Kid is right back up with a Canadian Destroyer to Lykos but Romo slides in and steals the pin at 7:04.

Rating: B-. This was about as long as they could go at this pace before it stops meaning as much. I do like the fact that they advance storylines on this show instead of just having one off matches as it adds a nice change of pace. Flamita was the most impressive of course but the other three got to showcase themselves as well, which is one of the hardest parts in a match like this.

Michael Oku vs. Brian Cage

Oku is a contender and Cage is a surprise opponent. He starts kicking at the legs and has a tornado DDT easily countered with raw power. A release powerbomb sets up a hard toss across the ring as Oku is already in big trouble. Cage throws him again and makes it even worse with a monkey flip. A little too much posing lets Oku get in a basement dropkick to the back of the head but doesn’t know what to do next, allowing Cage to throw him down again.

The F5 is countered and Oku goes up….for a moonsault that Cage can’t catch. Cage gets sent outside for the flip dive to the floor but it’s too early for a countout. The powerbomb counter into a sunset flip is botched so Oku reverses an F5 into the Canadian Destroyer (WAY too popular a move this weekend) for a delayed two. Well done on not doing the same spot and mixing it up a bit there. Cage’s helicopter bomb gets a rather surprising two and Oku reverses another powerbomb into a hurricanrana for two more. That’s it for Cage as the Drill Claw finishes Oku at 9:39.

Rating: C+. Well that was way better than it had any right to be as Oku is basically trying to get his first big win and has to fight Cage. I’ll give Cage some major points for that much selling as it made Oku look far better than he would have otherwise. Cage is one of those imports who can make for a good guest star and if he can help out the full time people, good for him.

Hiroshi Tanahashi/Will Ospreay vs. Minoru Suzuki/Zack Sabre Jr.

Suzuki/Sabre’s British Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. Tanahashi and Sabre start things off with Sabre taking him up against the rope with ease. That’s broken up and Sabre skips around the ring and Tanahashi can’t do anything with him. Ospreay comes in and knocks Sabre to the floor but Suzuki grabs an armbar over the ropes to cut off a dive. They head outside with Suzuki forearming the heck out of him, sending Ospreay down in a heap.

Back in and Ospreay lets Suzuki chop him and is stupid enough to let him do it a few more times. Everything breaks down and the villains slap on stereo holds. With those broken, Suzuki goes after the referee because he has to hurt someone. Ospreay’s nose is busted (looks broken) so Suzuki elbows him in the face. I love that kind of meanness. The half crab goes on as the announcers explain that this isn’t about a submission but just about pain.

Ospreay somehow springboards into a kick to the head and the hot tag brings in Tanahashi. They trade abdominal stretches but you know that’s not good enough for Sabre, who slaps on an armbar at the same time. Sabre stomps on the arm and it’s back to Suzuki for the exchange of forearms. Tanahashi knocks him backwards (shocking) and extends his jaw to give Suzuki a free shot.

Suzuki takes him down by the leg but Ospreay makes a save, allowing Tanahashi to get back up for a forearm. Ospreay fires in a long stretch of forearms to knock Suzuki down in the corner for a basement dropkick…..and Suzuki stands up. More forearms give Suzuki that “boy you done messed up look” so Ospreay says bring it. A forearm from Suzuki gives Ospreay that “my goodness that was incredibly painful look” but a spinwheel kick drops Suzuki.

The sleeper has Ospreay in more trouble and Sabre comes in for the Penalty Kicks. Tanahashi makes a save and the villains slap on stereo abdominal stretches. That’s broken up and a dragon screw legwhip sends Suzuki outside. The Sling Blade sets up the picture perfect shooting star press for two on Sabre. Back up and Ospreay tries Stormbreaker but gets reversed into the European Clutch for the pin at 21:17.

Rating: A-. Suzuki is still the scariest human in wrestling history and this was a good example of why you don’t try to hit him in the face. These guys beat each other up quite well and it even helps set up Tanahashi vs. Sabre tomorrow night at Madison Square Garden. This is the best match I’ve seen this weekend so far and that covers some ground, so Rev Pro comes through again.

Intermission.

Rocky Romero vs. Ryusuke Taguchi

I believe Swoggle is in the crowd along the aisle. Taguchi is in his rugby gear to celebrate the upcoming Rugby World Cup. Romero bails from the threat of a hip attack before going with an armbar to take Taguchi down. Back up and Romero offers a handshake, even shaking the referee’s hand to show that it’s legitimate. Taguchi does take the handshake but gets kicked in the ribs, allowing Romero to hit the Eddie Guerrero dance.

A handstand from Taguchi lets him offer a quick dropkick but he’s out of the way so Romero misses for a crash. The hip attack knocks Romero outside but Taguchi spends WAY too much time getting ready, allowing Romero to knock him outside. The suicide dive connects and it’s Romero hitting his own hip attack. That’s not cool with the fans and it’s an exchange of atomic drops….for stereo Flair Flops. A series of hip attacks have Romero in more trouble as this needs to end.

Taguchi rolls some vertical suplexes but Romero is right back with a springboard dropkick to the back. The Forever Lariats don’t last forever and it’s some Forever Hip Attacks until a tornado DDT plants Taguchi. Sliced Bread is countered into a series of rollups for two each because THIS WON’T JUST END. Romero hits some Kawada Kicks to the face and, you guessed it, Taguchi does the same things with hip attacks. Taguchi hits an enziguri and a running hip attack gets two. A double chickenwing faceplant finishes Romero at 15:22.

Rating: D-. WOW this was bad as it felt like it was going on for about three times what we got. It just kept going with about 80% of Taguchi’s offense being that stupid hip attack. This felt like a performance instead of two guys trying to win a match and that made it feel so much longer than anything else. I know Romero is a rather polarizing wrestler and I can easily see how that’s the case. Worst match I’ve seen all weekend and it was nearing torture.

Tomohiro Ishii vs. David Starr

Starr’s Cruiserweight Title isn’t on the line. Starr is always claiming that Rev Pro is against him (that was the case two years ago) so Ishii is pretty much here to kill him. Feeling out process to start and Starr decides it’s a good idea to chop someone called the Stone Pitbull. About five chops have no effect and one Ishii chop takes Starr down. It also fires Starr up as he’s right back on his feet for a hard running shoulder.

Starr stomps him down in the corner and hits a running clothesline for two. Ishii gets annoyed at the chops and forearms and it’s time for Starr’s pain to really begin. A rolling kick to the head drops Ishii to the floor and it’s a suicide dive to give Starr his best chance so far. Back in and a top rope elbow gives Starr two but his German suplex is no sold. A superkick works a bit better but Ishii is right back up with a delayed superplex for two more.

The sliding lariat is countered into a rollup for two and Starr fires off two straight lariats for his own near fall. Another superkick sets up the Tomorrow Driver (the brainbuster onto the knee) for two more as they’re trading covers here. Ishii has finally had it and nails the sliding lariat into the brainbuster for the pin at 13:08.

Rating: C+. They were beating on each other as hard as they could (well maybe not as hard as Ishii could) and that made for a good but not great match. There wasn’t exactly a story to the match and most of it was spent trading forearms and clotheslines until the end. There wasn’t a ton of drama because Starr never tried anything big and you knew that brainbuster was waiting at the end. It was good, but it never got that far out of high gear.

Aussie Open vs. Roppongi 3K

3K’s IWGP Junior Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. Davis and Yoh start things off with a test of strength taking Yoh down without much effort. Sho comes in to face Fletcher but everything breaks down with Roppongi dropkicking them to the floor for stereo flip dives. Back in and Fletcher gets dragged into the wrong corner but he’s right back with a double toss into the air for two on Sho. A hard clothesline connects for the same and it’s off to Davis to chop and elbow at Sho’s chest.

We hit the reverse chinlock with Yoh making a save as the slow beatdown continues. Fletcher kicks Sho down but can’t get a suplex as we hit the ten minute mark. Sho slips out of a suplex and hits a spear (you don’t see that one very often in Japan). That’s enough to bring Yoh back in for a backbreaker/neckbreaker combination on Fletcher. The Figure Four goes on until Davis comes over for a save.

Everything breaks down and Sho gets kicked on the floor, leaving Yoh to take an assisted cutter for two with Sho diving back in for the save. Fletcher and Yoh trade kicks to the head and back to the to the other two with Sho’s running clotheslines having no effect. A dropkick to the knee into a German suplex works a bit better and it’s Sho coming back in for double jumping knees to the face.

3K is broken up with Fletcher’s high crossbody but the Fidget Spinner is broken up. Yoh comes back in and 3K grabs stereo submissions, broken up by stereo reaching the ropes. Fletcher kicks Davis’ arm by mistake and gets rolled up for two but Sho is sent outside. A stuff piledriver into the Fidget Spinner is good for the pin on Yoh at 20:28.

Rating: C. This was WAY too long again and it hurt the match a lot. Aussie Open is good but it felt like they were extending the match for the sake of extending the match. That’s almost never a good idea and it really hurt things here. I was waiting on the match to end instead of wanting to see the finish and that’s not a good sign. It certainly wasn’t bad, but it was a long match at the end of a long show.

The shake hands to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a great example of a show being cut in half by intermission and the quality dropping off a cliff in the second half. The first half of this show was one of the better ones I’ve seen in a long time but the second was one long match after another and I was checking the clock a lot. There’s more good than bad, but it needed to have about twenty minutes cut to really make it great. Of just don’t do Taguchi vs. Romero at all. Check out that first half but move on to something else after intermission.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

WrestleCon: USA vs. The World
Date: April 5, 2019
Location: New York Hilton Midtown, New York City, New York
Commentators: Excalibur, Dan Barry

This is a new one as WrestleCon is running a pair of shows and there’s a theme to this one. It’s a pretty simple idea here and the name alone should explain things. We’ll be seeing some interesting matches here and WrestleCon knows how to do these things quite well most of the time. Let’s get to it.

If there was an opening sequence, it didn’t make the feed.

Emil Sitoci (World) vs. Brian Pillman Jr. (USA)

Sitoci was on the WXW show yesterday. Pillman goes right after him to start and sends Sitoci to the apron for a springboard dropkick to the floor. The fans chant for Papa Pillman as Sitoci sends him into the barricade. It’s time to wrap the leg around the post (Excalibur: “The ACTUAL hardest part of the ring ladies and gentlemen.”) so Sitoci can bring him back inside for a knee to the knee.

A spinning toehold sets up a Figure Four as Sitoci certainly knows how to work on a leg. Pillman grabs a rope and they chop it out with a powerslam getting two on Sitoci. A superplex attempt is broken up and Pillman nails a high crossbody to a big reaction. The knee to the jaw sets up a swinging neckbreaker for the pin on Sitoci at 7:55.

Rating: C. Pillman has a lot of potential and is already looking better than he should. He’s been a regular in MLW and right now he’s just in need of ring time. I hadn’t seen Sitoci before yesterday and he’s been a rather nice surprise. He’s not great or someone I want to see being signed to WWE, but he seems to be quite the star in WXW and wherever else he works.

USA – 1

World – 0

Maxwell Jacob Friedman (USA) vs. Ethan Page (World)

Before the match, Page sings You Are My Sunshine in reference to MJF singing it on the Rosie O’Donnell Show as a child in a video that recently made the rounds. MJF freaks out and they fight around the ring with Page dropping him face first onto the apron. Page’s fingers get caught in the turnbuckle hook to make Page scream and it’s time to start in on the arm.

The armbar goes on but Page uses the free arm to start up the song again for the break. MJF goes right back to the armbar and grabs the rope like a true heel. Why is that such a lost art? The referee kicks the arm away and Page swings with the right arm instead. MJF doesn’t seem to mind as he hits a top rope double stomp to the arm and slaps on a Fujiwara armbar. Page makes the rope so it’s a hanging piledriver to put him away at 6:19.

Rating: C-. I hate to admit it, but MJF is growing on me. He’s not too bad at all in the ring and does a nice job of breaking a limb apart in an old school style. I’m starting to see the potential in what he does and while the gimmick has been done before, it’s something that works quite well because it’s a classic. I want to see him get punched in the face and that means he’s doing his job quite well.

USA – 2

World – 0

David Starr (USA) vs. Daga (World)

Daga is a replacement for Susumo Yokosuka, a Dragon Gate talent that got pulled. They start fast with the flipping and near dives into an early standoff. Daga snaps off a hurricanrana to the floor and there’s a suicide dive. Back in and a tilt-a-whirl faceplant into a rolling kick to the head gives Starr two but Daga is right back up with a series of forearms. Starr headbutts the arm for a smart counter so Daga kicks him in the face for two. The brainbuster to the knee gives Starr another near fall and Daga nails a pop up Death Valley Driver.

Rating: B-. Starr is another guy who has grown on me a lot since I started watching this kind of wrestling. He has a charisma that can make whatever he does work and his in-ring abilities are quite good as well. He’s around on almost every show and I like him more every time I see him. That’s hard to do but he’s pulled it off.

USA – 3

World – 0

Darby Allin (USA) vs. Black Taurus (World)

Bonus match. It’s a creepy guy with half his face painted vs. a man in a bull mask. Taurus feels things out a bit before slapping the taste out of Allin’s mouth to send him outside. Back in and La Majistral gives Allin two and he sends Taurus outside for a quick suicide dive. Taurus shrugs it off and hits a Shining Wizard back inside, setting up an armbar.

Allin pops up and hits a bottom rope corkscrew splash, only to get his head taken off by the Rainmaker. Pete Dunne’s Bitter End gets another two but Allin backdrops him to the floor. The Coffin Drop connects but a second attempt hits knees back inside. A spinning sitout brainbuster finishes Allin at 7:18.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one, though that might be due to me not being overly familiar with either guy. I’ve seen them both before but neither of them are top stars. It’s nice to get something different involved though and the World side needed a win after such dominance so far.

USA – 3

World – 1

Jiro Ikemen (World) vs. Rich Swann (USA)

The very energetic and flamboyant Ikemen is a replacement for Masato Yoshino. Swann is even wearing the X Division Title but it’s not on the line. Hang on though as Swann walks through the crowd to get to the ring for his own energetic entrance. Ikemen wrestles in his jacket and they dance into a handshake. Swann knocks him down with a shoulder but Ikemen pops up for a pose, including a good look at the jacket.

The flip over Ikemen sets up a dropkick to the floor, where Swann makes sure he’s ok. After the confirmation, he kicks Ikemen in the ribs and tells the crowd that he is NOT ok. They start the chase around the ring with Ikemen hiding under the ring and slipping around to the other side for a running flip dive. Back in and Ikemen slaps on a half crab but makes sure to show off the inner lining of the jacket. A rope is grabbed and Swann is back up for a series of strikes to the face, with a big kick sending Ikemen outside.

Of course that means the flip dive to follow and a frog splash gets two back inside. Swann’s missed charge in the corner lets Ikemen hit an Arabian press for two of his own. A jumping hurricanrana brings Ikenem off the top and Swann’s stepover kick to the face gets a fall so near enough that the referee seemed to have to stop early. They exchange kicks to the leg with Swann’s knee giving out to set up the Figure Four. That’s broken up so Ikemen hits a moonsault for the pin at 9:19.

Rating: B-. Another match that I enjoyed with someone I’ve never seen before. Swann is one of the smoothest talents going today so you knew he was going to be doing his part here. Ikemen’s thing with the jacket is certainly unique so it was a nice mixture here of two people who can do the goofy stuff mixed with the serious wrestling.

USA – 3

World – 2

Rascalz (USA) vs. Robbie Eagles/Adam Brooks/Australian Suicide (World)

Well ok. The Rascalz are Trey Miguel/Zack Wentz/Dezmond Xavier. The Aussies are replacing more Dragon Gate talent who couldn’t make it due to visa issues. Suicide popped up on what is probably the last episode of Lucha Underground. We get some dueling international chants with Wentz doing Jim Duggan’s pose for a funny bit. The Americans flip off the international fans and everyone goes at it to start (I’m sure you saw that coming.) with Miguel sending Brooks outside but having to deal with Eagles. Suicide comes back in for a headscissors on Miguel so it’s off to Xavier for a dropsault to send him outside.

Brooks is back in with a series of Canadian Destroyers and a Meteora to crush Wentz on the apron. The big Fosbury Flop takes everyone down but the Rascalz are right back to take over only to have Suicide come back with a shooting star (not a press because there’s no cover) onto all three of them. Back in and another Canadian Destroyer sends Wentz outside, only to have Dezmond hit his moonsault kick to the head but Brooks comes in for the save. Miguel missile dropkicks him down, setting up Wentz’ top rope double stomp for the pin on Brooks at 6:48.

Rating: C+. It was fun while it lasted but I was hoping for some more of this one. The Rascalz have been a blast since I saw them for the first time in Impact so I was happy to see them on the card. Eagles impressed me yesterday at the Supershow so this was a rather nice match all around. It’s also nice to see the wrestlers finally going somewhere with the US vs. the World theme, which hasn’t been happening yet.

USA – 4

World – 2

LAX (USA) vs. Hart Foundation (World)

That would be Teddy Hart and Davey Boy Smith Jr., meaning Hart brings a cat with him. The Harts (replacing Brooks and Eagles) have been awesome in MLW so this should be a lot of fun. Fellow Foundation member Brian Pillman Jr. is in the crowd cheering instead of walking out with them due to reasons of the Pillman Family being a little odd.

They exchange poses in the corner to start and then shake hands before jumping LAX from behind after a minute and a half of stalling. Santana’s leg gets wrapped around the post and the Hartbreaker from Smith makes it even worse. Hart gets in a suplex on Ortiz and then yells about MLW being better than Impact. They get inside for the first time and Hart hits his moonsault elbow for two as it’s Ortiz in trouble early.

Smith hits a very delayed vertical suplex and it’s off to the chinlock. The surfboard goes on and Smith even kicks Ortiz forward for a crash onto the mat. Hart snaps off a powerslam but stops to yell at the referee before slapping on a Rings of Saturn. Ortiz tells him what he can suck and the hold is broken, triggering a SUCK MY **** chant from the crowd. Ortiz finally gets over for the hot tag as everything breaks down. Santana gets sent outside and an assisted Canadian Destroyer finishes Oritz at 10:39.

Rating: B. I like both teams and they worked a much more standard formula here, which works well when you have such talented people in there. The Harts have been one of the biggest surprises of the last year as the MLW crowd loves them and they’re having some awesome matches. LAX is LAX, so this was a very nice showcase all around.

Post match, Ortiz says that somehow, someday Hart will suck his ****. Hart: “I’m not going to address the sucking the ****.” He swears a lot and thanks the fans while ripping on New York. Hart also puts over Highspots for giving him a chance. He did NOT suck anything for a job here or in any big company. Smith says this is USA vs. the World but we’re all family.

USA – 4

World – 3

Sammy Guevara (USA) vs. Puma King (World)

The announcers can’t stand Sammy, which is rather easy to understand. There’s actually a story here as Sammy went through King’s bag a few weeks ago. They tease a handshake before it’s an exchange of double middle fingers. Sammy heads outside and reaches into the cameraman’s pocket to pull out a middle finger. They trade some flips without much contact and indeed it’s more middle fingers. A double dropkick gives us a double knockdown and it’s Puma being sent outside for the first flip dive.

Back in and Puma hits a superkick but hang on as he needs a mic. Puma tells us to subscribe to his YouTube channel (a Sammy trademark) so Sammy knees him in the face. That’s enough for Sammy to say f*** Puma’s YouTube channel. Now he’s going to go do some more spots and pin him. Sammy sends him to the floor for an apron moonsault and hits a super hurricanrana for two back inside. King is fine enough to hit a pendulum powerbomb for the pin at 8:57.

Rating: D+. This one is going to depend on your tastes and that’s perfectly fine. I get Sammy’s heel stuff and after all of the back and forth technical stuff that we’ve seen tonight, it’s fine to go with some comedy. King has been entertaining every time I’ve seen him and Sammy is certainly good when he’s doing his stuff. I wasn’t wild on the YouTube/middle finger stuff over and over, but it could have been worse.

USA – 4

World – 4

Brian Cage (USA) vs. Masato Tanaka (World)

Tanaka’s shoulder and crossbody don’t work as Cage catches him for some curls. Instead the forearms in the corner work a bit better until a sliding kick to the face take Tanaka down. The corner clotheslines set up a chinlock until Tanaka fights up and grabs a DDT. Cage hits the apron superplex and a top rope elbow for two, followed by the buckle bomb. Tanaka is right back with a brainbuster for two of his own but the frog splash hits knees.

Cage’s dead lift German suplex into a Death Valley Driver gets two more. Tanaka’s rolling elbow sends Cage into the ropes for the rebound lariat and they’re both down again. They trade the hard shots to the face again until Tanaka knees him down for two off the Sliding D. A second attempt is cut off with a clothesline and Cage’s buckle bomb sets up the Drill Claw for the pin at 9:50.

Rating: C+. This was very similar to Tanaka vs. Eddie Kingston from yesterday’s show and that’s not a bad thing. It was two big, strong guys hitting each other in the head until one of them couldn’t get up. Cage winning is fine as it seals the competition for America and while it doesn’t mean much, it’s the smart way to go to wrap things up. Nice hard hitting match here, which is all it should have been.

USA – 5

World – 4

Overall Rating: C. Well that was….short. The whole thing was barely two hours and I’d kind of like more than that for a $15 show. It was perfectly watchable but felt more like a supplement to yesterday’s Supershow. There might be one or two matches in there worth seeing (the Harts vs. LAX was a nice treat) but it’s certainly not worth going out of your way to see. I’m pretty disappointed in this as there was no standout show and the time really hut things.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

We’re under two days away from Takeover: New York and I believe that’s close enough to start getting excited. The show, as always, looks awesome and with a special imported match this year, we could be in for something even better than usual. There isn’t a bad looking match on the card and if things go well, it’s already going to be the show of the year. Let’s get to it.

Women’s Title: Shayna Baszler(c) vs. Bianca Belair vs. Kairi Sane vs. Io Shirai

We’ll start off with a confusing one as it depends on which wrestling story you go for. First of all you have the idea that when everyone else cancels themselves out, the champion, and best performer (maybe) at the moment, in this case Baszler, retains. At the same time though, there is the chance that we could have Baszler showing up on the main roster either over the weekend or next week. You could go either way, or cut it down the middle and have Baszler retain and show up on the main roster.

I think I’ll go with Belair winning, which I hope doesn’t lead to her talking more often. She’s an incredible athlete but she’s also one of the most annoying talkers I can remember in a very long time. Baszler can move up to the main roster while Belair feuds with the Sky Pirates or some of the other upcoming stars in the division. It might not be the most appealing choice, but it’s the one that makes the most sense.

North American Title: Velveteen Dream(c) vs. Matt Riddle

You know what I love the most about NXT? Ok maybe not the most but it’s certainly up there? It’s almost impossible to know who is going to win any given match. This one is a real tossup and it comes after a four way tossup. Dream is crazy over, but Riddle isn’t going to lose this soon in his NXT career. That and Dream just doesn’t win on the big stage most of the time.

That being said, I’ll take Riddle, as Dream might be on his way to the main roster (egads I hope not though). It’s what makes the most sense at this point and that’s usually the way NXT likes to go. These two could have an incredible match with Riddle playing by the rules (mostly) and Dream being so out there that it messes with Riddle’s mind. Either way, the fans are going to be going nuts and it should be awesome. But yeah, Riddle wins in the end.

Tag Team Titles: War Raiders(c) vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet

Can I please have an easy match on this show? Not everything has to be so well put together that it’s hard to figure out. Black and Ricochet are going to get a SmackDown Tag Team Title shot on Sunday. Now with that being the case, do you really want them to lose on an NXT show in a Tag Team Title match? If they do, why aren’t the War Raiders getting the shot at WrestleMania? Then again this company doesn’t tend to think that way so it’s anyone’s guess.

I’ll go with the War Raiders retaining here, as Black and Ricochet are locked in on the main roster and there’s no good reason to give them the NXT Tag Team Titles and expect them to be defended. Unless we’re getting some insane title unification deal (which I don’t think we are), the money move would be to make the War Raiders look even more dominant, as they’ve held the titles for a few months now but barely defended them.

United Kingdom Title: Pete Dunne(c) vs. Walter

Just take my money now. I’ll even up it to $19.98 for this one. These two are going to have one of the hardest hitting, knockdown drag out fights you’re ever going to see and it’s going to be awesome. Dunne is the kind of guy who would rather die than lose but he’s come close to being beaten before. How do you get around a monster like Walter? I’m not sure it can be done at this point.

Hence why I’m going with a new champion. Dunne has had an all time title reign and somehow doesn’t feel like he’s outgrown the title or is ready to move on from it, which is perhaps the most remarkable thing about the entire reign. He has to lose at some point though and if it’s not to Walter, who else could it be to? This is where the title change goes down, with Dunne fighting until the bitter end.

NXT Title: Johnny Gargano vs. Adam Cole

Let’s pause for a second and mourn the missing of what could have been the greatest blowoff in WWE since….I’ll get back to you on that. This was going to be Gargano FINALLY winning the title from Tommaso Ciampa and ending their war once and for all but the pesky neck injury is going to stop us from seeing it for the time being. This is for the vacant title and it’s 2/3 falls, which is kind of NXT’s signature match for a cool change of pace.

And I’m taking Cole winning the third fall after some kind of a distraction from Ciampa. That final match is going to happen and NXT is smart enough to keep Gargano hot until he’s back (they did it before), provided we don’t get something stupid like Cole being called up. Gargano is at his best when he’s chasing something and is foaming at the mouth to get it, so having him lose again and move on to something else is the right call. Also Cole is a great long term champion and could hold the title for months without much of a problem.

Overall Thoughts

Yes. Do I need to explain this any further than that? This could be one of the most entertaining shows of the year (it will be) with this crowd around them. NXT just gets these things and it’s going to be an incredible show with five matches that could all be classics. Just let them do their thing and be handed the weekend, because I don’t think it’s classified as stealing anymore when it’s expected of you.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Slumber Party Massacre
Date: April 4, 2019
Location: White Eagle Hall, Jersey City, New Jersey
Commentators: Matt Wadsworth, The Duke

Who can’t do four full shows in one day anymore? This is another Wrestlemania weekend show and another situation where I have no idea what to expect as I don’t follow Absolute Intense Wrestling. Here’s pretty much everything you need to know: the main event is Scott Steiner vs. Swoggle. We good? Let’s get to it.

No opening sequence, though it might have been cut off.

La Familia de Tijuana vs. Young Studs

Mexican Death Match. La Familia is Bestia 666/Damien 666 and the Studs are Bobby Beverly/Eric Ryan. There are a bunch of forks thrown into the ring and it’s time to go for blood early. I’m thinking I’ve made a mistake with this show. The blood is already flowing from Beverly’s head and it’s time to choke with belts. Ryan gets a chair wrapped around his neck and Damien sends it into the post. Eric is right back with a barbed wire bat to draw blood of his own and it’s time for some doors (they don’t use tables).

A chair gets rammed between Ryan’s legs, followed by the barbed wire being put against his head for some headbutts from Bestia. The Studs’ offense gets them nowhere and it’s a double MuscleBuster for two on Beverly. Ryan throws a chair at Damien to finally get somewhere and Beverly Japanese armdrags Ryan into both of them in the corner. And now, a door covered in forks. That takes a bit too long though and Damien hits a Death Valley Driver to put Ryan through the fork filled door for the pin at 9:34.

Rating: D. Oh yeah I’m not going to be liking this one very much as it’s seemingly trying to be ECW. There was no story mentioned here and it was just four people doing violent stuff to each other. Some of the spots were gruesome enough but there’s only so much you can get out of something like this.

Post match they shake hands and Ryan stabs himself in the head with a fork to a positive reaction.

Dominic Garrini vs. Joshua Bishop

Submission/surrender match. Garrini was on a show earlier today and Bishop (with manager Wes Barker) looks like a cross between Raven and Justin Credible. Garrini doesn’t waste time in kneeing Bishop outside for a double suicide dive. They chop it out as commentary says they don’t quite know why these two hate each other. Well at least they don’t like each other.

Bishop’s kick is caught and Garrini rams the ankle into the post for an F*** NO answer to a question of if he gives up. Bishop gets in a few shots to the ribs and it’s time for railroad spikes with both guys jabbing each other in the head over and over. The bloody Garrini goes for a choke but Barker hits him with a chair. That earns Barker a piledriver on the apron but Bishop chairs Garrini down to take over again.

Another door is set up between some chairs and Bishop powerbombs him through the door and the chairs. Back in and Garrini is alive enough to piledrive Bishop onto a chair for the NO so Garrini hits him with whatever he can find, including a tack covered bat to the face. Some wooden skewers are brought in but Bishop takes them away and drives it into Garrini’s cauliflower ear.

Bishop brings in a bag of tacks but gets front suplexed onto them, setting up a backsplash to make it even worse. Garrini drives the skewers into his head (and they hang there) until Bishop drops him onto the tacks for another no. With nothing else working, Bishop handcuffs Garrini around the post and gets some lighter fluid from Barker. The threat of fire makes Garrini give up at 11:25.

Rating: D+. Well that was sick. It had more of a story than the first match but I have a feeling we’re in for a lot of these matches tonight, albeit with a much more technical match thrown in so they can call themselves a wrestling company. I’m not a fan of this kind of insane stuff and it feels out of the 90s more than anything else.

The students come in to clear out the ring as Garrini is unhooked.

Tag Team Titles: To Infinity and Beyond vs. The Production vs. The Boys From Jollyville vs. The Philly Marino Experience

To Infinity and Beyond (Cheech and Colin Delaney) are defending and I have no idea who anyone else are. The Boys From Jolly (T-Money/Nasty Russ Myers) are also known as the Jollyville F***-Its, the Experience (Philly Collins and Marino Tenaglia seemingly the most popular team here) dance a lot and the Production (Derek Director and Eddie Only) seem like they make movies. Marino dives off the top on the champs and it’s T Money spinning Collins around so Myers can punch him in the face.

The Production’s manager Danhauser comes in and helps beat up Experience, who pops up for some double teaming. The champs come back in and clear the ring setting up a suicide dive from Cheech. Not to be outdone, Myers moonsaults onto everyone but gets caught. Philly goes up as well and moonsaults the pile down.

Sunset Dreams hits Colin for two with the Production diving in for the save. The huge Money Pounces Derek to the floor and busts up Philly’s spine. Russ mostly misses a moonsault for no cover on Derek, leaving Money to dive on everyone. Myers hits a top rope splash on Eddie Only (Derek’s partner) but Colin makes a save with a bad Stunner. Back up and it’s a Codebreaker/hanging DDT to the Producers at the same time. Another Codebreaker to Derek, with Cheech holding him in place for a superbomb from Colin, driving Eddie onto Derek for the pin at 6:58.

Rating: C-. It was certainly fast paced, though again I have no idea who most of these people are, who I’m supposed to cheer for (apparently not the guy in a Toy Story jacket) but that’s not what matters in something like this. A place like AIW is all about cramming in as much stuff as you can into the time you have and not worrying about any kind of flow or storytelling. I get the idea and this was the best thing so far, but it’s much more exciting than good, which can get old after awhile.

Post match the champs tell the fans to shut up and yell about any REAL teams who want to come see them in Cleveland. In other words, this is the only real wrestling.

Eddie Kingston vs. Shinjiro Otani

Otani is a Japanese legend, making me wonder if he got lost coming here. Kingston gets taken down by the arm to start and Otani slaps on a headlock that Eddie can’t break. They go with the loud chop off with Eddie being knocked down into the corner for a very delayed Facewash. A Broski Boot makes it even worse and Otani does it again, kicking his young boys down in the process. It works so well that Otani does it again….and then a third time.

It’s finally enough for two before Eddie gets up and starts in on the knee. Otani’s chops are cut off by another kick to the leg and we hit a half crab. After the grab of a rope gets Otani out, Eddie kicks the leg out all over again, setting up the spinning Backfist to the Future for two. Otani is right back up with a legsweep and a German suplex into a lariat for the pin at 9:47.

Rating: C. Well that was better than I expected, which has nothing to do with the match being an actual wrestling match instead of some violent brawl. Otani is a cool get for the show as he was wrestling all the way back in 1992 (and at Starrcade 1995) so it was cool to see something like this. Not a great match (Otani’s leg being fine out of nowhere was a stretch) but after everything else, I’ll take what I can get.

Post match Kingston praises Otani in Japanese.

Swoggle vs. Scott Steiner

Duke has been replaced on commentary by Colin Delaney. Steiner comes out but says cut his music, because he has some special music for this match. That would be….Short People by Randy Newman. Swoggle flips him off as Steiner conducts the crowd in a funny bit. Steiner swears a lot and rants about being politically correct before ripping into Swoggle with a variety of names that would be censored elsewhere.

He’s too good to face Swoggle here so Steiner has brought in his own short guy: Cabana Man Dan, who hits Swoggle with a flip flop. The German suplexes have Dan in trouble and Swoggle makes him tap to the Recliner. A woman who came out with Steiner gets in the ring so Swoggle kisses her, drawing Steiner in to blast him and get things going. Steiner sends him outside but Swoggle finds a beer to spit in Steiner’s face.

That just earns him a chair to the back and one near the head. Steiner swears a lot and hits him with another chair but it’s Dan’s turn to go inside. Dan spanks Swoggle with the flip flop….and Steiner beats Dan up too. Some belly to belly suplexes send Dan outside but Swoggle is up with a double middle finger. That means a Steiner Line and a belly to belly for two with Steiner pulling him up.

Rating: B. Well what else were you expecting here? I’ll give them some major, major points for actually making this something other than straight comedy and not having Swoggle win for the sake of a feel good moment. This was much more entertaining than it had any right to be (consider who was in there for a second) and I had a good time with it. Well done for a match that should have been an even bigger joke.

Maxwell Jacob Friedman/Ethan Page vs. Colt Cabana/Space Monkey

I know these people! You knew Cabana would be all over this weekend and that’s not a bad thing. Hang on a second as Page says Cabana needs to let his son be his (as in Page’s) partner. Cabana says deal so here’s….MJF for the match in I’m guessing an angle that they’re not bothering to explain. The fans sing YOU ARE MY SUNSHINE, presumably at Friedman, again in something that isn’t explained here.

Monkey shrugs it off and starts cleaning house but Page breaks up the monkey flip. A delayed vertical suplex drops Monkey and it’s off to MJF to stand on the tail. And now, just because, a tail lock. Monkey isn’t having that and it’s off to Cabana for elbows and a spinning spinebuster. MJF jumps on Cabana’s back and rants about Cabana being his father but gets taken down into the Billy Goat’s Curse for the tap at 7:45.

Rating: D+. I shouldn’t be left with a confused look on my face after a match but that’s what we had here. They could have explained the story here but that’s not as important as yelling laughing at Colt’s shtick. The joke seemed funny, but when you’re stuck trying to figure out what’s going on, it doesn’t exactly have the same impact.

Mance Warner vs. Nick Gage

Dang it this wasn’t on the card so it’s an extra match. Warner comes out to Simple Man, making him more awesome than usual. It’s just a cover but a heck of a well done one for a great entrance. Gage gets a hero’s welcome here and they go right with the fighting as this isn’t going to be anything but violence. Both guys get rammed into various things and it’s a chair across Gage’s back.

They fight up to the stage and trade shots to the face until Warner gets thrown off the stage. Gage bites the head and brings Warner and a chair back in but takes a running knee to the head for two. A bulldog onto Cage’s arm onto the chair keeps Gage in trouble but Warner takes too long on the lariat, allowing Gage to DDT him onto a chair. There’s the chokebreaker and a Broski Boot to drive a chair into Warner’s face. Warner’s manager Duke comes in and chairs Warner by mistake, earning a chair shot from Gage. Colin: “See Duke? Now you’re a dead person.”

Gage bridges another door between two chairs but gets chokeshoved off the middle rope through said door for two. A piece of the door hits Warner in the head but he pops up with a pair of lariats for two more. Gage is right back with back to back piledrivers onto a door into a powerbomb for the pin at 11:39.

Rating: C-. The lack of blood helped this a lot as it was more about two hardcore guys hitting each other. I never need to see another weapon shot to the head again and Gage isn’t a wrestler, but that’s not the point of something like this. I’ve really enjoyed what I’ve seen and heard from Warner though and it helped having him here a lot.

Post match Gage thanks the fans and promises to quit when the people stop cheering him, throwing in a small ton of F bombs along the way.

Absolute Title: Pretty Boy Smooth vs. Tim Donst vs. Matthew Justice vs. Tom Lawlor

Smooth is defending and Justice’s Intense Title isn’t on the line. Lawlor has never been pinned in singles competition and dances around the ring for a rather different presentation than you get in MLW. Lawlor is introduced as the 2005 Bob Evans pie eating champion. Smooth is a giant and probably stands about 6’8/9. Everyone goes after Smooth to start but he’s right back up and throws everyone around without much trouble.

Lawlor takes him down and grabs a Figure Four but throws in an ankle lock on Justice for a bonus. Donst makes the save before using Lawlor as a launchpad for an elbow on Smooth. Justice is back up with the suicide dives, plus a running elbow off the apron to send Lawlor into some chairs. Lawlor is right back up and chops it out with Justice, who gets the better of it. A big dive onto the floor takes out everyone for the major crash.

Back in and Justice gets crotched on top, setting up a heck of a superplex. Donst isn’t done and suplexes Justice into the other two for a near fall. Everyone gets a suplex from Donst, who collapses after throwing everyone. Justice is up first and goes Coast to Coast to hit Lawlor, who is then backdropped onto Justice and Smooth. Back in and it’s a series of rollups for two each before it’s a four way slugout from their knees. Donst’s Drunken Driver (Jay Driller) gets two on Justice as this just keeps going.

Smooth’s Call the Coroner chokebomb gets two on Lawlor so it’s time to throw in a bunch of chairs. Six of them are set up in a row but it’s Donst coming in and laying out Smooth. An STO plants Lawlor and a Drunken Driver through the chairs gets two more. The Rings of Saturn (Donst is billed as a mat wrestler and this is some of the first mat wrestling I’ve seen) go on and Justice’s chair shots can’t break it up. A third finally does it and Lawlor is up again, this time grabbing a choke on Smooth for the knockout win at 18:36.

Rating: D+. This was long and came at the end of a long night so it was kind of a chore to sit through. I have no idea why these people are fighting and that has been a problem all night long. Lawlor winning seems to be the smartest move as he’s the only one with any kind of a story. There were some good spots here but for the most part it just went on too long and had WAY too many kickouts.

Post match Lawlor thanks the company for giving him a chance about two years ago. The fans don’t really want to hear this and boo rather loudly. A year ago, he broke his arm in this company and rushed back but didn’t get a title shot. He got it tonight and showed AIW that he’s the best. Lawlor has a beer to end the night.

Overall Rating: D. I think the term “not for me” applies here as I wasn’t into almost any of this. It felt like an ECW knockoff (not all night, but for a lot of it) and that’s not something I was interested in with the ECW talent, let alone a place like this. It was FAR from the worst show I’ve ever seen but I had no idea what the stories were and since the announcers didn’t bother to tell me, you can only really go off of the product itself. That wasn’t very good either and the show felt very long. Not a disaster, but also certainly not worth as much as the WrestleCon Supershow or WXW. I likely won’t be back.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

WrestleCon Supershow
Date: April 4, 2019
Location: New York Hilton Midtown, New York City, New York
Commentators: Excalibur, Kevin Kelly

This might be my favorite show of the year and I’ve been looking forward to seeing it again. The idea here is you don’t know most of the card coming in, with just Will Ospreay vs. Bandido in the main event being announced. A lot of wrestlers from Dragon Gate were announced but visa situations have kept them off the show. That leaves some openings on the card and I’m curious to see what we get. Let’s get to it.

We get a YOUR EVENT WILL BEGIN SHORTLY graphic for twelve minutes until the ring announcer says we’re waiting on something from the athletic commission and an ambulance to arrive.

Here’s your WrestleCon Ambassador for the evening: Road Warrior Animal (without facepaint), who goes straight for the LOD chant. He can’t do this job by himself so he introduces….RIC FLAIR, which is quite the surprise. Good thing he’s healed from that Batista beating. Excalibur: “If anyone knows how to fill time.” Flair talks about the places he’s been in New York, including an affair with Leona Helmsley. He says this is a fraternity and puts over the Road Warriors as great competitors. One night in Philadelphia they painted Dusty Rhodes’ face and it was a riot on the way to the ring.

WrestleCon is a great place and there was a time when nobody wanted 200 wrestlers in a hotel. Animal: “There weren’t enough tickets to ride Space Mountain.” Flair has another reason to be here and mentions Sunday night being more important than anything he ever accomplished. The tears are flowing and thankfully the fans don’t boo the WWE reference. This is every bit as big as Hogan slamming Andre and he couldn’t be prouder. Thank you for everything and make sure to come see him tomorrow.

Back to the YOUR EVENT WILL BEGIN SHORTLY graphic.

The widow of Mark Hitchcock, an illustrator who world for WrestleCon died on his honeymoon, thanks the crowd for remembering him.

We’re ready to go 27 minutes late.

Eddie Kingston vs. Masato Tanaka

Tanaka is a former ECW World Champion and might look better now than he did twenty years ago. They go technical to start until Eddie takes him into the corner for a hard chop. Tanaka’s famous elbow sends Eddie outside to hold his jaw, as he should be doing. Back in and Tanaka hammers down right hands before a crossbody gets two. A running STO drops Tanaka and it’s back to the chops.

Tanaka’s tornado DDT works on the second attempt but a spinning Rock Bottom drops him again. Eddie loads up a superplex but gets reversed into Diamond Dust (a flipping Stunner out of the corner, a personal favorite). A frog splash gets two on Kingston and it’s time for the required chop off. Tanaka’s elbows and forearms get the better of it and the Roaring Elbow sets up the Sliding D (sliding elbow) finishes Kingston at 7:18.

Rating: C. This was your “I hit you hard and you hit me hard) match of the night, as WrestleCon is often a show built around doing a little bit of everything. Tanaka still looks awesome and I’m not surprised to see that he can still do something like this. Kingston is hit or miss at best, but having him do something like this fits him well.

Post match Kingston says that this was his dream match after seventeen years and thanks Tanaka in Japanese.

The announcers would love to break down the next match but they don’t know what it is.

Here are the Lucha Bros for the match but before their opponents come out, Fenix thanks the fans and says they’re the best tag team in the universe. They’re here because they’re open to face any tag team and pretty soon, they’ll be facing the other brother tag team. He means the Young Bucks, who are scared of the Lucha Bros and won’t be here tonight. Pentagon swears in Spanish a big (Kelly: “NO TRANSLATION REQUIRED!”) and the fans chant it after him. Since they don’t have a team to face, they can just fight each other.

Pentagon Jr. vs. Rey Fenix

Pentagon goes straight for the rollup to start but gets sent outside for the suicide dive. Back in Pentagon hits the Alberto Del Rio double stomp and yells at the referee for only counting two. Fenix kicks him in the face but walks into the Pentagon Driver for two more. The fans chant for the team, as they should given that it’s a good match so far.

Pentagon gets tied in the ropes and it’s a rope walk kick to the face as only Fenix can do. A Canadian Destroyer gives Fenix two more but he takes too much time rolling forward and gets superkicked in the face. Pentagon one ups him with a middle rope Canadian Destroyer but Fenix is right back up to catch him on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly to finish Pentagon at 6:56.

Rating: B. Oh man that’s it? Maybe they’re running short on time or something but this should have been at least another ten minutes if you wanted to do it justice. These two are as hot as anyone could be at the moment and that’s been the case for well over a year now. I hope they get a big chance in AEW (they will) and maybe even WWE one day. This needed to be more but for what it was, it was really good.

Puma King/Samantha Heights/DJZ/Tajiri vs. Sammy Guevara/LAX/Diamante

This could be…..I have no idea actually. I’ve never heard of Samantha but that’s a common occurrence around here. Tajiri always looks weird without a mustache. Puma just laying on the middle rope for all of the entrances is a rather unique visual. DJZ is ready for Guevara’s cheap shot and let’s hit that horn noise. Puma King comes in and kicks Sammy out but it’s off to Santana for a good moonsault.

Since it’s lucha rules, the fans get to see Tajiri with Kelly talking about how easy of a time Tajiri should have with all of the language issues in the match. The kicks have Puma King in trouble and it’s off to Diamante, who gets a handshake and kneel from Tajiri before he starts chopping her. A Stunner gets Diamante out of trouble and it’s off to Heights, who hits a Sliced Bread.

Ortiz comes in and runs Samantha over before shouting SUCK THESE. I’m not going near that one so I’ll go to Ortiz blocking a monkey flip and turning it into a faceplant. DJZ comes back in and flips forward into a clothesline to send Ortiz outside. Santana comes in with a superkick as everything breaks down. It’s back to Sammy for a jumping knee to the DJZ’s face and LAX adds a double flapjack.

Sammy can’t get over for a tag (Kelly: “Joey Ryan will charge you $30 for that!”) and Diamante gets two off a splash. Sammy does his fireman’s carry squats into a running shooting star press gets two on DJZ with Samantha coming in for the save. DJZ comes back with the always stupid stop of throwing partners into each other and making one DDT another.

That’s enough for a hot tag to Puma King to clean house and a big dive to the floor hits Santana. That sets off the parade of dives with the women hitting stereo dives. Tajiri is left alone in the ring but Ortiz cuts off his dive to become the biggest heel in the match. Ortiz tries a hiptoss but gets misted while in the air (cool), setting up the Buzzsaw Kick to give Tajiri the pin at 12:02.

Rating: C+. For a random assortment of eight people into a match with no connection between the teams, I liked it. That’s the kind of thing you get at these shows and it’s one of the most fun parts. Sometimes you just need to go out there and have some wrestling with a bunch of people having a match and that’s what we got here. It’s a WrestleCon tradition and one of their better ones so well done given the people in there.

Arez vs. Flamita vs. Robbie Eagles

Eagles is Bullet Club (and yes it’s still a thing) and billed as the Sniper of the Sky. Arez gets sent outside early on and it’s a flip off between Flamita and Eagles. Flamita kicks Arez in the head but he rolls forward into a dive outside onto Eagles. Back in and Arez drops a top rope elbow on Flamita, meaning it’s time to yell at the referee for counting slowly. A standing Spanish Fly gives Flamita two on Eagles but a superplex is countered.

Instead Arez tries to climb onto Flamita’s back so Eagles dives with a high crossbody, which is countered into a Spanish Fly (or something, as it was far from a clean landing). Arez takes off his jacket so Flamita can chop him even harder because wrestling is weird. Sliced Bread drops Eagles who DDTs Flamita at the same time and they’re all down. Flamita is up first and missile dropkicks both of them down, setting up a moonsault out to the floor to drop Arez again. Back in and Flamita misses a 450, allowing Eagles to hit one of his own on Arez for the pin at 6:54.

Rating: C. Arez didn’t get to show off very much while Flamita looked like the awesome high flier that he is and Eagles came off as a well rounded star. I can see why he got the win here and he looked like someone who belonged on a stage like this. It was a bunch of spots and that’s all it was supposed to be here.

Revolt vs. Hurricane/X-Pac/Jushin Thunder Liger

See what I mean about these random teams that make the show fun? Revolt (Caleb Konley, Jake Manning, Zane Riley) are mainstays around this show and have been a big deal in PWX from Charlotte. X-Pac is in the standard gear, though with NWO logos on the legs. After the place comes unglued for Liger, X-Pac puts him over as a legend on his retirement tour. Liger and Konley start things off with a battle of poses to the crowd. After being backed into the corner, Konley gets pulled down into the surfboard and you know the fans are going to love that.

It’s off to Riley (300+lb) to face X-Pac, meaning it’s a HALL OF FAMER chant. Riley wants a test of strength but is told to suck it instead. The rapid fire legdrops have Riley in trouble but it’s too early for the Bronco Buster. Manning (he likes scouting) and Hurricane come in for a handshake and a 3 COUNT chant, meaning the fans are cultured. The danceoff begins but the good guys join hands and flip Manning off (well not Liger, who just can’t do it).

The Hurricane pose sends Manning down onto the mat and he needs a timeout to check the scouting manual. It’s enough for a cheap shot to Hurricane and Konley comes in, only to have the heroes get together for a triple suplex. Hurricane gets caught in the wrong corner though and the heat is on. Riley’s choke doesn’t get him very far so it’s already back to Manning, who gets caught with the Eye of the Hurricane.

Liger comes in for the palm strikes but a distraction lets Riley run him over. Konley and Liger hit a double clothesline and it’s off to X-Pac to clean house. The spin kicks abound and it’s back to Liger, who tries to suplex Riley for some reason. Everything breaks down and it’s the palm strike to Manning with a Bronco Buster to Riley. Hurricane chokeslams Konley and the brainbuster finishes Manning at 13:37.

Rating: C+. Am I supposed to criticize this somehow? I was never an X-Pac fan but this was a blast and exactly what it should have been, even with a little more time than it probably should have gotten. With Liger retiring, he deserves to get whatever matches he wants to have and it’s a special treat to get to see someone who has been wrestling longer than I’ve been alive and still looked great. Hurricane and X-Pac were rather good as well, making this quite the entertaining match.

Post match Hurricane and X-Pac pay tribute to Liger again, as they should.

Intermission.

So apparently power to the Fite.TV stream went down during the intermission and we missed Dragon Lee vs. Cavernario. Dragon Lee won and if it’s on the replay, I’ll watch it later and edit it in.

Shane Strickland vs. Zack Sabre Jr.

Well if you insist. They go at each others’ legs to start and it’s Sabre taking him down for the first of what will likely be many leglocks. Strickland escapes and puts on another hold of his own before tying Strickland up in something like an STF. A cravate keeps Strickland in trouble but he comes back with a dragon screw legwhip but a gutbuster cuts Strickland down again.

Bored of the leg, Sabre switches up to the arm and gets in the required stomp to the raised arm. He even stands on Strickland’s head because Sabre is that big of a jerk. The overly cocky kicks to the head tick Strickland off (as they do to everyone) and it’s time for Sabre to tell him to chop. A big one to the leg takes Sabre down because Strickland was smart enough to know an armbar was coming.

The 619 to the ribs sets up the rolling cutter but Sabre is right back with another crank on the arm to take over. Strickland has had it with the shots to the face and tries another rolling cutter, but this time it’s pulled into the cross armbreaker. A triangle choke has Strickland in trouble until he powerbombs his way to freedom. Strickland grabs him by the nose (come on man) and kicks Sabre in the chest again.

A YES Kick knocks Sabre silly but he’s fine enough for a half and half suplex onto Strickland’s head. The head isn’t that damaged though as he hits a rolling German suplex. The Swerve Stomp is countered into the Rings of Saturn with Sabre’s legs and Sabre grabs a half crab for a bonus and the submission at 16:39.

Rating: B. My goodness Sabre is fun to watch. The guy can do whatever he wants in the ring and makes it look easy because he’s just that talented. Daniel Bryan was drooling over him during the Cruiserweight Classic and Sabre has gotten so much better since thin. Strickland is as smooth of a performer as you’re going to get in wrestling these days and it’s no surprise that he’s going to WWE.

Post match Strickland gets the sendoff because he’s NXT bound.

Here’s So Cal Uncensored before their match. Scorpio Sky does his thing about how he hates the town, which I still don’t quite get. Daniels praises the fans and says they want to be the top trio (which he sings for some reason) so let’s see what happens when it’s California love with a New York state of mind.

So Cal Uncensored vs. Orange Cassidy/Best Friends

Cassidy takes both hands out of his pockets and then puts them back in so Daniels grabs a headlock to knock off the sunglasses. The waistlock is countered as Cassidy puts his hands in his pockets and dances out, allowing him to chill on the mat. Cassidy runs the ropes, dropkicks Daniels down, and nips up, all without taking his hands out of his pockets. Trent comes in (Cassidy still doesn’t move his hands as he gets out, but one does come out on the apron) and chops Kazarian, who is rather confused.

Kazarian continues to be frustrated as Trent just stands there….so let’s switch teams. Trent is now part of SCU and Kazarian puts on the vest. It’s off to Sky to face Kazarian and it’s the New Age Outlaws cover with Sky trying a quick cover off a poke to the chest (the Fingerpoke of Doom was a singles match so it’s a completely different thing you see). That’s broken up and the Best Friends hit stereo fall away slams.

Double Razor’s Edges are countered with double backdrops and it’s Trent caught in the corner for a slingshot dropkick. Chuck gets in a cheap shot from the apron so Daniels knocks him down but the distraction lets Trent get in a low blow. Now it’s Chuck coming in for forearms to the back and it’s Cassidy coming in for a walk across the ring into a near hug, which is called a clothesline.

Cassidy walks around so slowly that the Best Friends both get in a few shots before Cassidy even bothers to cover. It’s back to Trent for an abdominal stretch and Cassidy puts glasses on Chuck, who slowly extends his arm for the cheating. So it’s the slacker Too Cool and Rikishi. Daniels puts the glasses on as well and it’s a slow energy fight with Cassidy. A big chop is teased but Daniels goes with a low blow so it’s off to Kazarian to take over and slap on a Figure Four to Trent.

A Backstabber hits Chuck and it’s an assisted tornado DDT on Trent, leaving Cassidy on his own. Daniels KNOCKS CASSIDY’S GLASSES OFF and it’s on in a hurry with Cassidy slugging away and hitting a double hurricanrana on Kazarian and Sky. A good looking double chokeslam takes them down again and Cassidy puts the glasses back on. That means going up top for a fall (intentional) onto Kazarian for two. The Best Friends come in to clean house again and we hit that hug. SCU has had it with this nonsense (of which they have been a part) and it’s the Best Meltzer Ever for the pin on Cassidy at 18:21.

Rating: C+. This one is going to entirely depend on your taste but my issue was it ran too long. That and you really have Cassidy take the pin here? He’s the most popular non-Liger guy on the show and you have him lose instead of say, Trent? His gimmick is fine for this kind of a show, but he’s not going to be able to do much beyond this because it’s a goofy comedy bit. That being said, this is the perfect show for something like that and it was more than good enough here. Cut off some of the time and it’s better, but it was fine for what it was. It’s just not for everyone and that’s fine.

Everyone hugs but Cassidy won’t take his hands out of his pockets for the post.

Will Ospreay vs. Bandido

Bell, Spanish Fly, Space Flying Tiger Drop, shooting star press for two on Bandido, we hit the thirty second mark. Bandido is back up with Swiss Death of all things, followed by a standing backflip World’s Strongest Slam to send Ospreay to the floor. A huge flip dive takes Ospreay down again and Bandido sticks the landing. That’s only good for two back inside and a delayed vertical suplex, including a squat, is good for the same on Ospreay.

The chops take Bandido right back down but he’s right back with the surfboard as an homage to Liger. That’s broken up so Ospreay hits a handspring into a kick to the head to put Bandido down again. A 619 over the top rope hits Bandido in the mask and it’s a delayed basement dropkick in the corner. Pip Pip Cheerio keeps Bandido in trouble and Ospreay swears a lot.

Bandido must not be a fan of swearing (attaboy) so he comes back with a one handed sitout gorilla press slam (egads man) to cut Ospreay off. Ospreay wants him to bring it and they strike it out until Ospreay snaps off a low angle dragon suplex. Stormbreaker is countered with an armdrag and a pop up powerbomb drops Ospreay again. The Robinson Special puts Bandido down again but he gets caught with a reverse hurricanrana off the middle rope (that’s a new one) for another near fall.

Ospreay fights out of something on top and hits the Cheeky Nandos kick before knocking Bandido over the barricade. You know where this is going and it’s the huge crossbody to the floor to send Bandido into the third row. Back in and a missile dropkick to the back of the head sets up Stormbreaker but Bandido reverses into a hurricanrana for two. The Oscutter is countered into a knee to the face for another two and Bandido can’t believe it. Ospreay is right back up with a Rainmaker into the Oscutter and Stormbreaker finishes Bandido at 16:51.

Rating: B+. This was exactly what it was advertised as being: two of the best high fliers in the world doing insane spots to each other for a long time. Ospreay is on another level for someone his size and Bandido is certainly no slouch in everything he does. Great match here and worthy of a main event, even though you could tell the fans were spent.

Post match Ospreay counts the money the fans throw out (Ospreay: “Four dollars! Two Cokes!” Kelly: “Not in New York City.”) and praises Bandido. Anyone who knows him knows that his mental health problems have been worse than ever recently but wrestling is the best therapy you can have. All he has is raw natural ability and they just created an art form. Ospreay thanks everyone and bows to Bandido.

Overall Rating: B. As usual, this is the show where you put your feet up and have a good time watching wrestling because it’s all about seeing what you’re getting and just having a lot of fun. You get all kinds of people coming out of nowhere and having one great match after another. It’s a blast of a show with some excellent matches and a little bit of everything for everyone. Have a good time with it and enjoy what wrestling can be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Amerika Ist Wunderbar
Date: April 4, 2019
Location: La Boom, Woodside, New York
Commentators: Jeremy Grave, Sebastian Hollmichel

This is WXW (Westside Xtreme Wrestling) from Germany and another promotion I don’t know much about. A few weeks ago someone asked me to do one of their shows so I’ll take care of it as part of the Wrestlemania weekend festivities. As usual I have no idea what to expect from this so let’s get to it.

We’re joined in progress with David Star yelling at Lucky Kid, who won the 16 Karat Gold Tournament and gets to face Starr tonight. Kid doesn’t look impressed as Starr leaves.

Opening sequence, featuring some names such as Walter and Toni Storm, meaning I won’t be totally lost.

And now the same opening sequence as I think we’re starting late.

And now, a black screen as the streaming problems seem to be in full swing.

We’re good to go about twelve minutes after the scheduled start, which is pretty good for indy wrestling.

LAX vs. The Crown

The Crown is Alexander James/Jurn Simmons. Thankfully commentary feels us in a bit, saying that the Crown is a relatively new team who stumbled out of the gate. James and Ortiz start with Ortiz claiming a hair pull. Well to be fair there’s kind of a lot of it man. A northern lights suplex gives Ortiz two and it’s off to Santana to kick James in the head.

Simmons comes in for some better luck with the powerful forearms to Santana’s back. The Crown takes over in the corner but Santana slips away and jumps over the ropes with Ortiz tagging in on the way. LAX speeds things up in a hurry with a series of splashes straight out of the Lucha House Party playbook. Simmons is right back up with a hard suplex to take over again though and it’s back to James for something like a triangle choke.

Ortiz finally fights out and rolls over for the hot tag to Santana as the pace picks back up. A sitout F5 takes James down but the top rope double stomp misses. An Alley Oop plants James again and Santana drops a frog splash for two with Simmons making the save. The Street Sweeper is broken up but the Decapitation (whatever that is) is broken up as well. LAX is right back up with the double belly to back faceplant for the pin on James at 11:21.

Rating: B-. LAX is just good and always worth checking out no matter where they are. They kind of came out of nowhere and I can’t imagine they stick around the small pond of Impact Wrestling much longer. They’re that good and a team who could be stars anywhere they go. Hopefully that’s the case in the future as they’ve more than earned it. The Crown was fine for a power team but nothing all that great.

Darby Allin vs. Avalanche

Thank goodness for name graphics, though I’ve seen Allin before in MLW. Avalanche is a monster (duh) though apparently not a Shark or an Earthquake. The smaller (and more dead looking) Allin bails outside to start and Avalanche follows, earning himself a whip into the barricade. Back in and Avalanche takes over as the German chants begin. I don’t speak German but I might have better luck with that than the NXT UK chants.

Allin manages a Code Red for two and a flipping Stunner follows, only to walk into a Samoan drop. A Fujiwara armbar works a bit better for Allin as Avalanche has to get a boot on the rope. Back up and Avalanche uses the power to take over again, this time asking Allin what is wrong with him. A running splash in the corner (the Avalanche) sets up a fall away slam into a Vader Bomb for the pin on Allin at 5:14.

Rating: D+. Just a step above a squash here with Avalanche following the tradition of the German monsters. Allin was trying but there was only so much he could do against a monster like Avalanche. It was a good way to see what Avalanche can do and that’s what makes sense going forward for the company.

Yuu vs. Jordynne Grace

Women’s match with Grace as a replacement for LuFisto who isn’t here for some reason (that’s better as I just saw the face and didn’t remember LuFisto looking like that). Grace takes her down with a headlock to start and runs Yuu over with a shoulder. Yuu’s headlock doesn’t work and it’s a pair of running knees in the corner to set up another Vader Bomb.

Yuu takes her down and grabs a chinlock, which lasts as long as you would expect for a chinlock against someone made of muscle. Grace hits a charge in the corner and a spinning Samoan drop gets two. The Grace Driver (pumphandle driver) finishes Yuu at 7:54. Dropping someone on the back of their head can do that most of the time.

Rating: D+. These two beat each other up but Yuu was clearly a few steps behind. Grace has been impressive in Impact as she looks unique enough to be a monster with some skills, which is more than you might expect from someone her size. Yuu was completely acceptable but nothing too special.

Video on the Shotgun Title (seems like a midcard title) match. The subtitles don’t help all that much but I think the title changed hands recently and the former champion is getting his rematch. Fair enough.

Shotgun Title: Marius Al Ani vs. Emil Sitoci

Sitoci is defending after winning the title from Ani a few days ago. They start fast with Ani grabbing a quickly broken chinlock and getting armdragged down. Back up and Ani sends him into the ropes but stops to pose, allowing Emil to grab a backslide for two. A suplex sets up a double arm crank as Emil can’t keep the momentum going. Ani kicks him in the back of the head and poses some more as they have the face vs. heel dynamic set up pretty well.

Back in and Emil hits a good belly to belly before slapping on a seated abdominal stretch. The split legged moonsault hits Ani’s raised knees but Ani grabs an O’Connor Roll into an ankle lock to put Emil in trouble for a change. That doesn’t last long either as Emil is up with a gutbuster and a top rope elbow to stay on the ribs. A snapmare driver is countered into a quickly broken ankle lock so Ani throws him down with a release exploder suplex. Ani goes up top for a splash but gets pulled down into a super Spanish Fly to retain Emil’s title at 9:02.

Rating: C+. These guys looked better than anyone else on the show so far as they beat each other up and you could see the story of the match. It’s perfectly fine for a title defense and the finish looked good. Emil was referred to as a legend and I could see him being someone who had been a star for a long time around here. Good match and another nice entry on the show.

We see the same argument between Starr and Kid that opened the show.

David Starr vs. Lucky Kid

I think I’ve been watching too much indy wrestling as I now recognize Starr’s music and can recite most of his many nicknames. Kid seems to be rather popular and I don’t think Starr would be a face in his own living room. The announcers recap the story with Starr being jealous of Kid winning the 16 Karat Gold Tournament and not getting the respect he demands.

Kid defeating Walter has something to do with it as well. Kid starts fast and slides between the legs for a dropkick to the head. That leaves Kid in the ring for a little taunting (not good against Starr, who calls himself the King of Taunts), meaning it’s Starr coming back inside to nail him in the head. Starr takes it outside and drops Kid on the barricade, only to get chopped in the corner. A big lariat gives Starr two and it’s time to just hammer away at Kid’s head.

The referee starts a count on the downed Kid but Starr comes over to get him, meaning the comeback is on. Kid can’t get a Crossface so they trade forearms to the head. Starr catches him on top with a belly to belly superplex….which is no sold. Well ok then. With the suplexes not working, Starr hammers away with more shots to the head until Kid grabs a suplex of his own. Starr’s German suplex (how appropriate) and another lariat are shrugged off for something like a powerbomb to put Starr down again.

Kid slaps him in the face and grabs a small package for two but the Blackheart Buster (brainbuster onto the knee gives Starr a very close two. A powerbomb onto the knee gets two more and Starr can’t believe it. Kid is dead so Starr kicks him in the head and yells about making Walter tap out.

That earns him a middle finger from Kid and the fans remind Starr that he never beat Walter. They slug it out with Starr’s lariat staggering Kid. Starr tries it again but gets reversed into a Crossface, which is broken up in a hurry. Sliced Bread puts Starr down and Kid’s 450 goes knees first into Starr’s chest. Another Crossface makes Starr tap at 14:33.

Rating: B+. It takes something special to suck you into a show where you don’t know what’s going on and only know one of the wrestlers. I liked this match quite a bit with Starr’s frustration coming through as Kid managed to survive to continue what seems to be Starr’s descent into madness. Very good match here and I liked it far more than I was expecting.

Post match Starr sits in the corner and grabs the mic, saying that he’s not safe venting his frustrations anymore. This is Wrestlemania weekend, but the fans here have allowed the evil corporation to take over independent wrestling. Starr is independent and there are certain cowards who don’t show up to shows like this. Cowards who tapped out to him at 16 Karat Gold (Walter) and work for companies who don’t provide healthcare or allow them to unionize. These fans were chanting NXT so they’re just as fake as Walter is. Walter won’t face him in a WXW ring so Starr is quitting WXW.

Aussie Open is ready to defend the Tag Team Titles. Works for me as they’re rather awesome. An unnamed guy comes in and doesn’t think much of them.

Absolute Andy vs. Chris Brookes

I’ve heard a lot about Andy before but I’ve never actually seen him wrestle. Andy chills on the floor to start and pulls Brookes outside so the chopping can begin. A suicide dive has Andy in more trouble and Brookes adds a double stomp from the barricade. Andy can’t powerbomb him onto the barricade so Brookes wraps the ring skirt over Andy’s face and hits another stomp. As they get in for the first time, Andy kicks the ropes for a low blow behind the referee’s back to take over. Andy sends him into the corner and we get the opening bell as the four minutes of brawling before didn’t count.

A missed charge in the corner lets Brookes get up top for a backsplash to the back and a suplex gets two on the bigger Andy. A spinebuster plants Brookes right back down but Andy misses a good looking moonsault. Brookes gets two off a slingshot cutter and grabs something close to a Koji Clutch. That’s broken up with a foot on the rope and Andy is fine enough to run the corner for a belly to belly superplex. Andy grabs an F5 but gets reversed into a rollup for a very sudden pin at 5:43.

Rating: C-. It was fine while it lasted but it didn’t last long. Andy seems to be a legend around here, which is rather impressive given his pretty generic physique (he has some size to him but not much in the way of muscles). Brookes is someone I’ve seen elsewhere before but never been all that impressed by him. I could have gone for more of this and I can see either of them giving a better performance with more time.

Tag Team Titles: Aussie Open vs. Workhorsemen

Aussie Open (Mark Davis/Kyle Fletcher, who don’t have their belts for some reason) are defending against JD Henry/Anthony Henry. Fletcher and Henry start things off and the fans are split. Henry takes him into the corner to start and backflips away for some early posing. The Workhorsemen start in on the arm with the rather large Henry (those are some huge trunks) coming in for a Codebreaker into a knee to the head from Henry.

Fletcher muscles Henry over for a suplex though and it’s off to Davis for the power chops. It’s already back to Fletcher, who misses a charge in the corner and gets chopped by Henry. A neckbreaker onto Henry’s raised knees get two on Fletcher and it’s off to a chinlock. Fletcher gets taken into the corner but fights out of it in a hurry, allowing the hot tag off to Davis for the house cleaning.

Henry and Davis slug it out until Fletcher comes in, only to have Henry run both Aussies open. Gibson and Drake are sent outside, leaving Henry and Davis to slug it out. The other two come back in and are chopped down almost immediately. Henry’s sitout slam sets up a moonsault for a VERY close two as the announcers can’t seem to remember which one is Henry and which one is Drake. The Aussies are right back and Drake gets superkicked, setting up a piledriver and a double flipping powerslam (the Fidget Spinner) retains the titles at 15:49.

Rating: B. Another rather good match here as Aussie Open is one of the better indy teams around today. They work well together and this was quite the match from both teams. This is the reason I like watching shows from this weekend as you never know what kind of random pairing you’re going to see with this kind of a result. Good stuff here, as the show is getting back on a roll.

WXW Unified World Title: Bobby Gunns vs. Shigehiro Irie

Gunns is defending and a smoker, described as the King of Smoke Style. Uh, yeah. Gunns takes him down as we hear about Irie pinning Gunns before Gunns won the title. Makes enough sense. Irie gets in a bulldog to put the champ down and a rather early near fall. A cross armbreaker is broken up in a hurry and Gunns kicks him in the back. The arm wringing begins and Gunns stomps on the raised arm ala Shayna Baszler.

An STF is broken up with a rope grab and Irie scores with a quick suplex for two. Irie gets in a good looking top rope splash for two but Gunns pops up from a hard left armed clothesline. Gunns snaps off the German suplex but gets Pounced hard into the corner. They head to the apron with Irie nailing a piledriver to knock Gunns silly, albeit on the floor.

Gunns starts crawling back inside and gets caught with a legdrop to the back. The Cannonball gives Irie two and he blasts Gunns with his Beast Bomber lariat for two, with the bad arm preventing the fast cover. Gunns catches him on top and snaps the fingers ala Pete Dunne (he’s an NXT fan).

Irie is too big to be German suplexed so Gunns pulls him down into the Rings of Saturn. That’s quite the problem so Irie bites the rope for the break. Sebastian: “By the skin of his teeth!” Jeremy: “That was perfect Sebastian.” The Beast Bomber gives Irie two and they flip each other off with Gunns pulling him into a cross armbreaker for the tap at 15:30.

Rating: B-. It was entertaining but it didn’t feel like a major match at all. Gunns isn’t the most thrilling wrestler and I didn’t get invested into this one for the most part. Irie felt like a monster for Gunns to slay and while that’s fine and exactly what Gunns did, it didn’t exactly get overly entertaining and I didn’t buy Gunns’ title as being in jeopardy.

Post match here’s Joey Janela of all people as Gunns lights up a cigarette. Janela does the same and says he wants the belt.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this. I’m not sure how much I’d want to watch it in the future but for what we got here, I had a good time. There were enough good matches to keep the show entertaining with only one or two being less than adequate. I can see why this is one of the better received European promotions and it was better than expected. Well done.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6