Royal Rumble 1999
Date: January 24, 1999
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 14,816
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

What did I ever do to you people? I try to give you all a variety of stuff and somehow I always wind up with freaking Russo. Isn’t me freaking out over 2000 WCW enough for your bloody thirsty evildoers? Anyway, it’s Austin vs. McMahon at #1 and #2, along with Rock being borderline criminal against Mankind in an I Quit match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video makes no secret of the fact that this is all about Austin vs. McMahon. The World Title match isn’t even mentioned.

Of note: the theme song here would become Vince’s theme for pretty much ever.

Road Dogg vs. Big Boss Man

Road Dogg is Hardcore Champion after beating Boss Man (half of the Tag Team Champions and part of the Corporation) to win the title. Therefore the solution: let them have a regular singles match. Ah the powers of Russo. Even Cole is trying to figure out why the Corporation wouldn’t want a chance to get a title. Boss Man is still one of the only people I’ve ever seen who stands on the bottom rope for his pre-match posing.

Dogg gets shoved down to start and we get an early hair pulling complaint. I hope he files the proper paperwork for that. Or he could just punch Boss Man in the face instead. Boss Man misses a charge in the corner and gets crotched as Lawler tries to explain why this isn’t a title match. I’ll give him points for trying but it really makes no sense. Boss Man gets more aggressive but is told this isn’t a hardcore match.

The distraction lets Dogg crotch Boss Man against the post but he punches and kicks Dogg down with ease. They’re clearly trying really hard to have a regular match but neither guy seems to know how to do it. We hit a bearhug from…..well from the person you would expect to use a bearhug in this match. Dogg actually raises the roof to get the crowd on his side but gets dropped with a knee to the ribs.

The referee checking on Dogg allows Boss Man to unhook the turnbuckle pad and we’re just waiting on it to come back and cost him. Boss Man wins another slugout but gets caught in a sleeper. That goes nowhere so Dogg has to slam him off the top and it’s slugout the fourth. A flying forearm and the shaky knee get two for Dogg but he walks into the Boss Man Slam for the fast pin.

Rating: D. So their big idea was to have one of their most popular acts wrestle a style out of his element against an opponent not capable of wrestling that style and then lose. I’ve said it before but it deserves repeating: Vince Russo is really not that bright when it comes to putting together shows.

We recap Billy Gunn vs. Ken Shamrock. Gunn had, ahem, exposed himself to to Shamrock’s sister Ryan. Ken went psycho (again) and set this up with his Intercontinental Title on the line.

Intercontinental Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Billy Gunn

Gunn is challenging but has a bad ankle coming in. Shamrock is the part of the Corporation and the other half of the Tag Team Champions. It’s actually Gunn being the aggressor to start by choking Ken down while Lawler is in full on heel mode here, completely supporting Shamrock for wanting to destroy Billy. A clothesline and delayed vertical get two for Gunn but he misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post.

Shamrock slowly kicks away until he ducks his head and gets caught in a Fameasser for two. So what exactly is Gunn’s finisher then, as that was treated like a nothing move. Gunn misses a charge and falls out to the floor so Ken can send him hands first into the post. I say first falsely implying that any other part of his body hit the post as well.

Shamrock takes some time to jaw with the fans, allowing Billy to come back with something like a Stroke off the apron and onto the announcers’ table. Well at least that looked good. Back in and Ken starts going after the ankle nearly ten minutes into the match. We get some very slow kicks to the ankle as Cole can’t remember Gunn ever submitting. Uh, right. Anyway, Shamrock pulls him down by the hair and gets two off a fisherman’s suplex.

The referee gets bumped and a double clothesline puts Gunn and Shamrock down as well. Cue Val Venis, who had recent issues with Shamrock, to take the champion down with a DDT. Gunn makes his comeback as there are fans in towels doing Val’s gyrations in the crowd. Billy hurts his ankle again coming off the top and the ankle lock retains Ken’s title.

Rating: D+. Off the top of my head, I can’t remember a less necessary run in. It didn’t change anything and they could have done the exact same finish without Venis coming out there. On top of that, the fans are actually pretty quiet. Believe it or not, there isn’t a lot of interest in thirty five minutes of a thrown together nothing team beating one of the most popular teams of all time in back to back matches.

Shane McMahon tries to fire up his dad for tonight.

European Title: X-Pac vs. Gangrel

X-Pac is defending of course. Feeling out process to start, which isn’t the smartest move in the world for a match that isn’t likely to go more than six minutes. X-Pac quickly takes him down and drops a leg for two. It’s already time for the rapid fire kicks in the corner but the Bronco Buster only hits corner. Gangrel is smart enough to follow up with a belly to belly for two and we hit a quick chinlock.

That goes nowhere so Gangrel throws him into the air and into a big crash, only to miss a top rope…..we’ll say elbow. X-Pac starts his comeback with a pair of spinwheel kicks because he’s a man of limited awesome. The champ tries a high cross body but Gangrel rolls through for a three but the referee says two anyway.

Lawler actually has a good explanation by saying the first count was for X-Pac’s cover and the other two were for Gangrel. That’s not what happened but it’s as logical of an explanation as they were going to find. Back up and Gangrel tries to throw X-Pac into the air, only to get pulled down into the X Factor to retain the title.

Rating: C-. Actually not bad here with Gangrel being a totally serviceable worker most of the time. That being said, there’s almost no story here as the announcers didn’t have any reason for these two to be fighting. At least the fans finally had something to cheer for a change though as it’s been a lot of energy killing losses so far.

DX says they’re a family but tonight it’s every man (and woman according to Chyna) for themselves.

Here’s Shane McMahon to introduce Luna Vachon, who he says is winning the Women’s Title due to Sable having a bad back. Sable comes out and says ring the bell. I have no idea what connection Shane has to this feud and the announcers didn’t seem to bother explaining the story.

Women’s Title: Luna Vachon vs. Sable

Sable is defending and this is a strap match. Luna bails to the floor to start but gets pulled face first into the post. Back in and Sable chokes away as Shane calls Luna hot. Sable can only get two buckles though until Luna pulls her down. That earns Sable a whipping and some kicks in the corner, only to have Luna hit a quick backbreaker.

Luna starts dragging her around to three buckles with Sable slapping them as they go. Of course Luna doesn’t notice because wrestling logic is screwy. Sable flips over Luna and goes for the fourth buckle but Shane gets on the apron for a distraction, which somehow doesn’t count as a break in the momentum. Not that it matters as Sable’s insane fan jumps the barricade and decks Luna, allowing Sable to hit the fourth buckle and retain the title.

Rating: F+. I really can’t stand these gimmick matches getting less than five minutes but they’re a Russo staple. The problem here is there’s no real reason to have all these stories going on, along with no time to build up any drama and advance the story of the match. In other words, it’s too little material in too little time and it drags the whole thing down.

The Corporation debates over who gets to eliminate Austin and win the $100,000 bounty Vince has put on his head tonight.

We recap Mankind vs. the Rock. Mankind won the title on January 4 and Rock wanted a rematch. He offered various stipulations to Mankind before saying he quit trying. That was enough to get Mankind to agree because he knew he would never quit. Therefore it’s time for an I Quit match for the title. Mankind summed it up very simply with a question to Rock: “How does it feel to be in a match you can’t win and I can’t lose?”

A fired up Rock guarantees to win because he’s just that awesome. Watching Beyond the Mat has kind of ruined this for me as it showed Mankind standing about two feet away while Rock was talking here.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mankind

Mankind is defending and this is an I Quit match. Also of note, Mankind had to face Mabel (Viscera) on Sunday Night Heat, resulting in a bad rib injury. Rock gets pounded into the corner to start and Mankind hits his running knee to the head. Some right hands won’t make Rock quit yet though so Mankind hits him with the microphone. They head outside with Mankind going knees first into the steps in one of his trademark bumps. Is there any shock that he can barely walk around today?

Rock goes over to do commentary so Mankind blasts him in the head with a chair, only to draw another no. The Mandible Claw knocks Rock mostly out but he won’t quit. Mankind tries to take him into the crowd but charges into a belly to belly right back over the barricade for a big crash. Back to ringside with Rock loading up a Rock Bottom through the Spanish announce table but it quickly breaks under their weight. Since it wasn’t really worse for either guy, Mankind is right back up and sending Rock into the post.

The fight goes up the aisle with Rock shrugging off right hands and DDTing the champ on the floor. For some reason Rock thinks it’s smart to bring in a ladder but a hard shot still won’t make Mankind quit. Rock climbs the ladder next to the technical area and Mankind follows him up to a little catwalk. A low blow stops Mankind and Rock rams him off the stand and onto the equipment, causing an explosion and the loss of the arena lights.

The match basically stops as Shane comes out but Rock says there’s not going to be a doctor because Mankind is going to quit. Mankind can barely move so Rock drags him back to the ring as this is now a much slower pace. With nothing else working, Rock handcuffs Mankind behind his back and it’s about to get ugly.

Some right hands and rams into the buckle have Mankind bleeding but he kicks Rock low to get a breather. Another low blow has Rock in trouble (and the receding hairline doesn’t do him much good either) but of course he won’t quit. A clothesline puts Mankind down and now it’s time to get scary.

Rock puts a chair over Mankind’s face for a People’s elbow but he still won’t quit. Now we get the infamous part of the match as Rock hits him a ridiculous eleven straight times in the head with Mankind not being able to defend himself in the slightest. Even Lawler says that’s enough after two shots. Mankind is completely out as Rock puts the mic to his mouth and a recording of Mankind’s voice from weeks ago says he quits to give Rock the title back.

Rating: B-. That ending is too much to take and is almost more brutal than the Cell match against Undertaker. The beating just kept going and going with Mankind looking weaker and weaker every time. Apparently Rock hit him about three times as much as he was supposed to and Foley’s family was terrified (justly so) over what they saw. The rest of the match is good enough but the ending is one of the scariest things you’ll ever see in wrestling, or anywhere for that matter.

We recap Austin vs. Vince which just happens to be taking place in the Royal Rumble. There’s no secret about the fact that this is all about those two and to be fair that’s the only thing anyone wanted to see. Austin is #1 and Vince is #2, meaning we’re going to see them for at least ninety seconds. Vince has also put a $100,000 bounty on Austin’s head, in case you didn’t have enough stories going on yet.

Also earlier tonight, Austin crushed some cars with his monster truck and then beat up the Stooges in the arena. I’m not sure what that adds to anything but it’s a thing that happened. As usual, such is life in Russo’s WWF.

Royal Rumble

Austin is in at #1 and Vince is in at #2 and the intervals are ninety seconds. Fink takes FOREVER to do the full rules and Lawler is telling him to shut up. Fair point too as he’s explaining what does and does not constitute eliminations. Of note here, we get the debut of Vince’s chiseled physique which was a real shock as no one had ever seen his arms before. Austin pounds away to start (shocking I know) but opts not to throw Vince out as Golga (Earthquake in a mask as part of the Oddities, which is one of the most bizarre character changes I’ve ever seen) is in at #3.

Golga goes after Austin but gets dumped in fifteen seconds. Vince bails under the ropes and goes into the crowd to give us a chase scene. They fight into the concourse as Droz is #4 and this is where the match starts to fall apart. If Austin and Vince are going to fight through the back, why have Golga get eliminated when you could do Golga vs. Droz? It’s not much (save for a battle of really strange names) but at the moment, the fans in the arena are paying to see Droz stand around doing absolutely nothing.

This is even more proof that Russo is a good idea man but has no idea how to run an actual show. It’s not even a complicated concept: you need to give the fans something to watch. I know there are more people on the other side of the camera but you can’t forget the people who paid money to come see you. It’s poor planning and shows a severe lack of thinking, which is Russo in part of a nutshell.

Speaking of Russo, we see Austin getting beaten down by the Corporation until the camera cuts off. That means we cut back to Droz who is….standing there. Yeah this is really what you’re paying to see: a guy standing in the ring doing nothing. Edge comes in at #5 to give us something but the fans are now dead because they’ve lost Austin and Vince (neither of whom were eliminated) but they’re stuck with two uninteresting guys that have no chance of winning.

After nothing of note, here’s Gillberg (with full Goldberg entrance) at #6 to keep this stupid. Gillberg is out in just a few seconds as we cut to Austin unconscious in the ladies room. Steve Blackman is in at #7 as Austin is stretchered out. The clock is flying by now as they need to get some action going to revive the crowd. Dan Severn is in at #8 as the lack of star power is already making this horrible.

We see Austin going into the ambulance, which to be fair is more interesting than four nothings (remember that Edge wasn’t a big thing for a long time to come) wasting time in the ring. Tiger Ali Singh, one of the biggest misfires you’ll ever seen, is in at #9. Blue Meanie is in at #10 and we’re somehow a third of the way through this.

After Austin and Vince, the biggest name in the match so far has been…..geez I guess Droz. What this match needed was a midcard act to clean out the deadwood (Shamrock perhaps) until some popular act (maybe the Outlaws) came in to balance him out. Put Shamrock in at about #8 and the Outlaws in at about #13 and #16 respectfully, then pick up the pace again later on. But no, let’s have this huge bunch of nothing in the ring to kill the crowd until we get back to Austin vs. Vince at the end because Heaven forbid Russo come up with anything besides one idea.

There’s no one at #11 but we cut to the back (again) to see Mabel destroying Mosh and taking his spot. Blackman and Severn are quickly put out with Singh following them a few seconds later. Road Dogg is in at #12 to FINALLY give the fans someone they care about. Meanie is dumped as well, leaving us Edge, Mabel and Road Dogg in the ring.

Edge is eliminated a few seconds later but there go the lights because we haven’t had an angle in a few seconds. It’s the Ministry of Darkness (is there a reason Undertaker isn’t on this card?) to eliminate Mabel and here’s Undertaker to hypnotize him, leading to Mabel becoming Viscera. Therefore, we have ANOTHER lull as Dogg is all alone.

Gangrel is in at #13 and doesn’t last thirty seconds, giving us the third lull of the first half of the match. Add that to the fact that save for Austin and McMahon who haven’t been seen in twenty minutes, the first eleven entrants are already gone, making the first third of the match completely worthless. Kurrgan is in at #14 and beats on the Dogg until Al Snow is in at #15, only to be eliminated in less than a minute.

Goldust is in at #16 to interrupt Dogg vs. Kurrgan II. Dogg knocks both of them down and gets the fans breathing again with a SUCK IT. Here’s Godfather at #17 as it occurs to me that three of these people will be Intercontinental Champion in less than three months. They go from boring everyone here to having a title in that span of time. Again, only Russo.

Kane is in at #18 to FINALLY give us someone who might have a prayer of a chance at winning this thing. He clears the ring in thirty seconds but here are people from the mental institution to reclaim Kane, who eliminates himself and runs through the crowd. So yeah, we now have NO ONE IN THE RING, meaning that when Shamrock comes in at #19, he has nothing to do but stand around as we wait for an opponent. Oh wait Vince comes back to do commentary as we’re just sitting around.

As we wait, allow me to point out that save for the first two, the first eighteen entrants have all been eliminated, making nearly two thirds of the match completely worthless. Billy Gunn comes in at #20, wearing one boot. Heaven forbid we get anything going through as Shamrock takes him down with a kick to the bad ankle. Gunn throws him into the corner for a break but Ken goes after the ankle again.

Test is in at #21 but let’s cut to Mabel being put in a hearse. As luck would have it, an ambulance pulls in with Austin driving, because he was able to wake up, commandeer the ambulance, and drive back here in the span of half an hour. We FINALLY go back to the ring where Gunn low blows both guys. Big Boss Man is in at #22 to line up the Corporation members for Austin, who comes down and chases Vince off. Shamrock is quickly dumped and Vince is back on commentary.

It’s HHH at #23 as you can see the star power starting up because we couldn’t have them in there earlier in the match because of whatever reasons. People start taking worthless shots at Austin, who blasts Gunn with a hard clothesline. Val Venis is in at #24 and Austin dumps Gunn, giving us Vince, Austin, Test, Venis, Boss Man and HHH. X-Pac is in at #25 as Lawler wants to know why no one is going after Austin. Fair point, but the answer would be “because the script says they shouldn’t.”

X-Pac kicks Austin in the face and it’s Mark Henry at #26 to a far bigger reaction than you would expect. Jeff Jarrett is in at #27 as there’s just nothing going on between these entrants. The stupidity continues as X-Pac is the only one going after Austin and it’s likely not even due to the money. D’Lo Brown is #28, still feeling guilty for making Terri Runnels suffer a miscarriage. Austin easily dumps Test and Boss Man gets rid of X-Pac a few seconds later.

Henry clotheslines HHH and Jarrett goes after Austin, prompting Vince to praise him in something that sounds bizarre today. HHH gets rid of Jarrett and it’s Owen Hart taking his place at #29. Owen and Brown double team Austin until HHH makes the save, presumably to get all the money for himself. Austin slips to the floor and throws water at Vince. Chyna is the first woman in the history of the Rumble at #30 and immediately dumps Henry. That earns her an elimination from Austin and we’re down to Austin, Vince, HHH, Venis, Brown, Boss Man and Owen.

We get Austin vs. HHH in a fall preview but HHH has to eliminate Venis. Austin uses the distraction to Stun HHH and toss him, leaving us with four in the ring. Brown misses a dropkick on Austin (why are these two fighting in the final five of the Royal Rumble?) and everything slows down AGAIN. Owen enziguris Austin but gets backdropped out. Boss Man punches Austin down and D’Lo hits the Low Down, only to have Boss Man throw him out.

A Stunner is enough to get rid of Boss Man and we’re down to Austin vs. Vince. Well of course we are. They fight on the floor (read as Austin beats him up even more) before Vince hits a quick low blow instead. That earns him a Stunner but Rock comes out for a distraction, allowing Vince to dump Austin and win the Rumble.

Rating: F. Do I even need to explain this one? You had Austin, possibly at the peak of his popularity, and even he couldn’t get anything out of the fans. It’s further proof that you can’t just treat your fans like garbage the entire night and then expect them to pop for your one idea.

On top of that, these shows continue to not be able to hold up. Can you imagine if this happened today? No one would buy Vince as keeping the title shot because there was no way that could happen. This result was designed to get people to watch Raw the next night to see how Austin was going to get out of this one. That’s fine at the time, but it really doesn’t hold up on a second viewing in the slightest.

It really is amazing when you consider that Russo somehow put together the worst Royal Rumble ever, followed by maybe the worst Wrestlemania of all time just two months later. Why in the world would someone think that he should be given even more power and authority? This was one of the biggest disasters I’ve ever seen and it’s almost painful to sit through all over again.

Shane and the Stooges come out to celebrate, meaning it’s time for beers. This goes on for a bit until a two minute highlight package takes us out.

Overall Rating: F+. Let’s recap here. On a six match card, you had two face wins with X-Pac and Gangrel. In other words, the face wins came in the most meaningless matches on the card. As I said in the redos of some WCW pay per views, you have to give the fans something to cheer for. This was one of the worst major shows I can remember in a long time and it’s almost all because of Russo not knowing how to write a wrestling show. This is one of those rare shows with almost nothing positive going on and it’s really amazing that they actually put this on and expected people to be entertained.

Ratings Comparison

Big Boss Man vs. Road Dogg

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2016 Redo: D

Ken Shamrock vs. Billy Gunn

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: D+

X-Pac vs. Gangrel

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: C-

Sable vs. Luna Vachon

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2016 Redo: F+

The Rock vs. Mankind

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2016 Redo: B-

Royal Rumble

Original: F

2013 Redo: F

2016 Redo: F

Overall Rating

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D

2016 Redo: F+

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-1999-please-make-it-stop/

And the original redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/12/royal-rumble-count-up-2013-redo-1999-disturbing-to-watch-for-multiple-reasons/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

So this has kind of blown up the wrestling world in recent days.

For those of you who have missed it, Mae Young Classic competitor Priscilla Kelly pulled a bloody tampon out of her trunks at a show over the weekend and shoved it in her opponent’s face. You can imagine how this went over with some wrestlers and how it went over with others at the same time. I think you can also imagine my reaction to it.

I’ll be nicer this time and say this isn’t exactly my kind of wrestling entertainment. It was at a 21+ show, but that doesn’t mean that as someone over 21 that I want to see it happen. This is little more than a shock value moment, just like the crazy death match stuff with explosions and all the barbed wire and whatever else they come up with that day. If you need something like that to get over, maybe you need to work on your skills or character more, because no other talented wrestler need to go that far to get a reaction.

This isn’t some terrible, horrible thing. It’s just stupid and someone throwing something out there to get a reaction out of people instead of putting in the effort to earn one. There are people who will defend it by calling it performance art or creativity and all that jazz and that’s fine. I’d question why those people rarely make it on the highest levels of wrestling but that’s just me.

Oh and Road Dogg being the one to defend this from WWE made the whole thing that much funnier. Was a true standard bearer like Billy Gunn or X-Pac not available?

I kind of have to say something longer about this right?

What exactly am I supposed to say? We know five wrestlers and the name of a show at the moment. I have no idea if this is going to work or not and other than a lot of speculation about big names who might show up, we don’t know much of anything about the promotion. They’ve certainly made a splash to start, but there’s a fine line between something being talked about and the people coming to all of the shows.

It’s way too early to say where AEW is going, but I like what I’ve seen so far. It might wind up being a big indy or something like that and there’s nothing wrong with occupying that spot. If it turns into a bidding war and talent makes more money, that’s an awesome situation. I’m just trying to not get overly excited yet though, as the second show is likely to be a success. That’s not where the issue is going to be. The issue is going to be in the fifteenth or so show. How many people are going to come to that?

And better yet: how many of their lower level talents can WWE pick off? They might not be able to get Cody and the Bucks, but what about a few marginal people? If WWE starts picking them off, in the words of Road Dogg when the rest of the promotion walked out and DX was all that’s left, “Are we supposed to wrestle ourselves every week?”.

I’m firmly in a wait and see mode, because there isn’t much to see at the moment.

Homecoming
Date: January 6, 2019
Location: The Asylum, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

It’s back to pay per view tonight with a show in the old stomping grounds. This isn’t a One Night Stand kind of deal or anything like that as it’s a pretty standard pay per view card with only the venue being old school. The main event will see World Champion Johnny Impact defend against Brian Cage where shenanigans could be a factor. Let’s get to it.

The opening video, narrated by Johnny Impact, looks back at the old days in the Asylum and talks about how good it can feel to go home. This aired at the end of Impact and was released on the YouTube page.

X-Division Title: Ethan Page vs. Jake Crist vs. Trey Miguel vs. Rich Swann

The title is vacant coming in and this is Ultimate X, meaning there’s an X made of rope above the ring with the title hanging in the middle. First one to crawl over and pull down the title is champion. It’s a brawl to start with Ethan heading up for the title in a hurry but falling down onto Miguel instead. Page isn’t done and shoves Miguel off the top and onto the other two.

That earns him quite the reaction but it’s way too early for the climb. Back in and Crist scores with some kicks until Miguel takes him down with a neckbreaker. The fans are VERY appreciative here and we get an IMPACT WRESTLING chant. Page gets caught in the corner and it’s Miguel and Swann kicking him in the ace before climbing up. Instead of going up on his own, Crist fails at an attempt at a double cutter. He gets smart the second time though and crotches them both before hitting the cutter on the second attempt.

With the three of them down, Page goes for a climb but makes a rather dumb decision by dropping down into an elbow on Crist. Miguel goes up until Page pulls him down into a backbreaker. Crist legdrops Page and then hits a running DDT onto the floor on Page. Swann follows them out with the big flip dive and the fans are rather pleased. Swann and Miguel climb the structure with the former being pulled down and Miguel moonsaulting onto Crist and Page.

Everyone staggers back inside and it’s a double powerbomb/Meteora combination to destroy Page again. Swann gets taken outside for a Tombstone on the ramp from Crist, who dumps him up onto the stage to keep him even further from the ring. That gets Crist close to the title so Page spears him off the top for the huge crash.

Swann is right back up with a hurricanrana to bring Miguel off the top. Miguel hits a hurricanrana of his own but Swann lands on his feet and sprints up to grab the title for the win at 13:55. The title seemed to fall down so that might not have been the planned finish. It wouldn’t have been the first time.

Rating: B. This was the insanity that it needed to be with one big spot after another. Swann winning is the right call too as he’s the top star of the division at the moment and someone who could be the big deal that it’s needed for a long time. The other three all looked awesome too here, if you can ignore some rather dumb actions here and there.

The announcers run down the card for a good while as the structure is taken down.

Brian Cage talks about how Impact is getting the serious version tonight. He’s sacrificed everything to get here and there’s one outcome: Cage walking out as World Champion.

We recap Allie/Su Yung vs. Kiera Hogan/Jordynne Grace. Allie sacrificed her soul to save Rosemary but kind of got ripped off, resulting in her being turned into Dark Allie, which she doesn’t seem to mind. Kiera is still determined to save her friend and Grace just showed up earlier this week to even things out.

Jordynne Grace/Kiera Hogan vs. Su Yung/Allie

Grace snapmares Allie down to start and hits a low crossbody for an early two. It’s already off to Yung, who gets dropkicked down upon entry. A running hip attack in the corner gets two and it’s back to Allie, who bails to the floor instead of fighting Kiera. The confusion is enough for Yung to get in a cheap shot on Hogan by sending her into the buckle. The double beatdown is on and a hangman’s neckbreaker out of the Tree of Woe makes it worse for Hogan.

Yung climbs the buckles for a headscissors and Allie gets two off a Backstabber. Kiera comes back with some forearms to Yung and an awkward looking collision puts both of them down. It’s enough for the hot tag to Grace and house is cleaned in a hurry. Everything breaks down and the evil ones get taken down by a dive. Back in and Allie rakes Grace’s eyes so Hogan can tag herself in.

A fisherman’s suplex gets two and it’s back to Grace for a powerbomb to Yung and a World’s Strongest Slam to Allie at the same time (though she BARELY held them up). That’s only good for two on Allie, who mists Grace in the really evil act. The Codebreaker hits Hogan but Allie wants Su’s bloody glove. The Mandible Claw finishes Hogan at 8:58.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what I was expecting and that’s the right call. Allie and Yung have some staying power as heels, at least until Rosemary is back to save Allie’s soul. The match wasn’t the point here and Allie pinning Hogan makes sense. Now just get Rosemary back and see where things go.

Post match Yung beats on Hogan even more and here are the bridesmaids with the coffin. Rosemary pops out though and punches some bridesmaids before growling at Yung. Rosemary crawls inside and stares at Allie, who is rather panicked. She reaches to touch Allie’s head and Allie bails in a hurry.

We recap Eddie Edwards vs. Moose. They were friends until Moose got hurt and claimed Eddie didn’t care. Moose turned on him and sent Eddie over the edge, putting him in a mental hospital. Raven of all people (I don’t get it either) got Eddie out of the hospital and it’s time for a Falls Count Anywhere match.

Eddie Edwards vs. Moose

Falls Count Anywhere. Eddie jumps him during the entrances, as he should because he’s not the kind of guy who would wait for a bell here. Moose catches the suicide dive though and Eddie gets TOSSED into the steps. Back to back powerbombs on the floor and apron give Moose two and it’s time to load up the steps, plus a piece of barricade between the ring and the regular barricade.

Another powerbomb is countered and Eddie takes it back to the floor, this time heading into the crowd. The fans want them to come OVER HERE, though I’d settle for a camera staying on them. What looked like a beer can to Moose’s head makes him walk even more but Moose whips him into some steps to the upper deck. Eddie of course hits a dive off the balcony but would rather chop Moose than cover him.

Back to ringside with Eddie getting knocked off the apron, sending him face first into the barricade. A bunch of chairs are thrown in and Moose posts Eddie to keep him down. Eddie is busted open (as he should be) and Moose bites at the cut (as he shouldn’t be). For some reason Moose goes up, allowing Eddie to pelt a chair at his head. The chairs are piled up and a top rope superplex drops both guys onto them for the huge crash.

Back up and they chop it out with Moose taking off the glove for good measure. Moose charges but gets backdropped onto the aforementioned piece of barricade. Eddie takes him back inside and grabs a kendo stick for the real beating. Cue Alisha Edwards to take the stick away…and beat on Moose instead. The big stick shot from Eddie sets up the DDT for the pin at 13:13.

Rating: B-. This was pretty close to the violent fight that it should have been and hopefully it wraps up the feud once and for all. There’s no reason to keep things going and Eddie winning is a pretty definitive finish. Alisha accepting Eddie’s violence and helping with the beatdown was a nice touch, especially since there was no Raven to get involved here.

Sami Callihan promises to destroy Willie Mack tonight. Mack is in over his head and has made the mistake of looking for a fight with the wrong man. It’s still not clear why Sami isn’t attacking Willie’s buddy Rich Swann but Mack wants to fight anyway.

Willie Mack vs. Sami Callihan

Dave Crist is here with Callihan. Mack starts fast and snaps off a hurricanrana before hitting a running flip dive onto Crist and Callihan for the early control. Back in and Swann hits a running seated Blockbuster but a Crist distraction lets Sami ram him face first into the apron. There’s the running kick to the side of Mack’s head and it’s time for the OVE SUCKS chants. Back in and Sami hits the spit chop in the corner before we hit the chinlock. Mack jawbreaks his way to freedom but Sami rakes the eyes.

That goes nowhere for some reason but another Crist distraction lets Sami roll him up for two. A Samoan drop into a standing moonsault gives Mack two of his own, setting up a running hip attack in the corner. When did that become the most popular move in wrestling? The Sky High gives Mack two more but Callihan scores with a powerbomb into the V Trigger for two.

The Stunner out of nowhere gives Mack two more as Sami has to get his foot on the ropes. Mack goes up and thanks to a third Crist distraction, it’s a super Death Valley Driver for one. A hard lariat gives Sami another one as Mack is getting all fired up. Another lariat turns Mack inside out and the Cactus Piledriver gives Sami the pin at 10:13.

Rating: C+. Mack has developed a habit of stealing the show and he came close here. Sami winning makes the most sense here as Mack isn’t ready to beat someone like him, but Mack is rapidly becoming one of the most entertaining guys in the division. If they keep treating him well, he’s going to be just fine for a long time.

Eli Drake stands in front of a cage where Abyss was born nearly twenty years ago. He’s ready to get rid of hardcore and laughs off the idea that he’s afraid. Tonight is Monster’s Ball and he has monster balls, so hardcore ends tonight.

We recap Eli Drake vs. Abyss. Drake claimed that the company was an unsafe working environment and decided to destroy hardcore wrestling. He went after Joseph Park to get rid of Abyss, which earned him an offer for Monster’s Ball at Homecoming. This of course turned into an ECW reunion with Tommy Dreamer and Raven laying Drake out on the go home show.

Abyss vs. Eli Drake

Monster’s Ball, meaning hardcore. Abyss throws in a bunch of weapons before the bell so Drake gets in a staple gun shot to take over. For some reason he tries a sunset flip and gets stapled in the chest. Abyss loads up two tables at ringside but Drake knocks him into the crowd. The breather lets Drake kick him low and drive an anvil case into Abyss’ head to really take over.

Back inside and some garbage can shots to the head rock Abyss all over again. A running metal sign shot is countered into an overhead belly to belly though and Drake goes FLYING through the tables. That looked awesome, even if it was telegraphed (not a bad thing in this case). It’s time for thumbtacks but Drake elbows his way out of the chokeslam. Drake picks up some tacks but hits the referee in the face by mistake. The Black Hole Slam gets two as the referee isn’t quite blinded.

Abyss grabs Janice (the spiked 2×4) but Drake gets in a shot to save himself. That’s fine with Abyss, who chokeslams him onto the tacks. That’s only good for two and Drake chairs him in back before grabbing some zip ties. Abyss breaks them off so Drake unloads on him with the chair, hitting him about twenty straight times….for two. Drake busts out the paddle and breaks it over Abyss’ head for the pin at 12:12.

Rating: C. Standard weapons match here, though that overhead belly to belly through the tables was great. Drake winning doesn’t save the whole story but it saves my head from exploding. He’s WAY too talented to be stuck in a feud like this and him losing to the mostly retired guy would have been one of the worst ideas they could have had. That and a lack of ECW legends helped this a lot.

Killer Kross finds tonight’s main event interesting. A series of events have led us here but after tonight, Option C will be replaced by Option X. Tick tock.

We recap LAX vs. the Lucha Bros. LAX have held the Tag Team Titles for a long time and now want the huge match. Konnan doesn’t think they’re ready though and has walked out, meaning LAX is on their own. This could be the match of the night by a mile if it goes as people are expecting.

Tag Team Titles: LAX vs. Lucha Bros

LAX is defending and there’s no Konnan in sight. Fenix and Santana start things off in a feeling out process. A very fast armdrag sends Santana into the ropes for a kick to the back from Pentagon and it’s a double superkick on Santana with Fenix hitting a crazy hard suicide dive on Ortiz. Santana gets back up and sends Fenix outside for a kick to Pentagon’s head, followed by the backsplash from Ortiz.

Pentagon goes outside as well and Santana hits a top rope Asai moonsault to take him right back down. Back in and a Lionsault/legdrop combination gets two on Pentagon as they’ve certainly started fast. Fenix saves his brother from a double suplex and the champs are sat outside on the ramp. Pentagon throws a charging Fenix onto both of them before hitting his own no hands flip dive onto the pile.

Back in and a Codebreaker/top rope double stomp combination gets two on Ortiz. Santana comes back in and hits a reverse powerbomb into a top rope splash but Pentagon runs in for the crazy save with a step up Canadian Destroyer (GEEZ) to put everyone down. Ortiz and Pentagon slap it out and it’s a series of running kicks to put all four down again.

The Bros get back up first with the spike Fear Factor to Santana, though Ortiz is a bit late with the save and Santana has to kick out on his own. The Street Sweeper hits Pentagon with Fenix diving in with a dropkick for the save. A rolling cutter into a Codebreaker into a superkick finishes Fenix out of nowhere to retain the titles at 10:48.

Rating: B+. It’s the most entertaining thing on the card so far but this didn’t hit the heights they should have reached. It needed another five to ten minutes as I was expecting this to be nearly twice as long. What we got was good, but it wasn’t built up, making the match feel like it was designed to be a classic instead of just being a classic. Very good, but it could have been a lot more.

Post match Konnan comes out to say he was wrong about LAX, but right about this being a great match.

Gail Kim doesn’t like Tessa Blanchard but she’ll call it down the line.

We recap Taya Valkyrie vs. Tessa Blanchard. Tessa has had to escape with the title multiple times now and has cheated more than once. Therefore, Gail Kim is back as guest referee, and because we haven’t seen her in a long time and that just won’t do.

Knockouts Title: Tessa Blanchard vs. Taya Valkyrie

Tessa is defending Gail Kim is guest referee. An early toss doesn’t get Tessa very far as she charges into a boot in the corner and there’s a double stomp to keep the champ in trouble. A knee to the face sends Tessa outside but she whips Taya into the barricade. Tessa adds a dropkick to drive her into the barricade and we hit the seated armbar back inside. Taya’s neck is bent around the ropes and Gail has to yell at Tessa to break it up. A heck of a clothesline out of the corner puts Tessa in trouble and a straitjacket suplex gives Taya two.

The double knees in the corner get two more and Taya reverses the Buzzsaw DDT into a northern lights suplex. They’re showcasing Taya being equally strong here, which isn’t something Tessa is used to. Taya misses a moonsault and there’s a spear (because every wrestler needs a spear). Tessa can’t believe the kickout and accidentally runs Gail over. The Buzzsaw DDT connects for no cover because Gail is suffering from retired wrestler syndrome.

Tessa grabs the title for the tug of war with Gail, who accidentally hits Taya in the head with the belt. That’s good for two so Tessa shoves Gail in no the brightest move. Gail shoves her into a rollup for two and they seem to botch the setup for a Codebreaker out of the corner. Therefore they do it again with the Codebreaker connecting the second time around. Gail counts two so Tessa drives her into the corner. That’s enough for Gail, who hits Eat Defeat to set up the Road To Valhalla to make Taya champion at 10:36.

Rating: C-. They botched some spots pretty badly and Gail was WAY too much of the focus here. There’s a good chance that it’s going to set up Tessa vs. Gail, which would be treated as a bigger match that whatever Taya is doing. The wrestling could have been better too and the match got bogged down by everything they had going on here. At least there were a few good moments, but way too much focus on Gail, as usual.

The announcers talk about the move to the Pursuit Channel. As a bonus, it’s also going to be on their Twitch channel, which is WAY overdue.

Johnny Impact says tonight isn’t about friendship because it’s about the World Title. He’s a fighting champion instead of a paper champion. There have been a bunch of people he’s thought deserved a shot and he’s given them those shots. Tonight, he’s doing it again with Cage.

We recap the World Title match. Impact finally won the World Title at Bound For Glory and Cage cashed in Option C by trading in his X-Division Title for a shot at the World Title here. Cage has gotten more serious and is almost unstoppable to put Impact in trouble.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Brian Cage vs. Johnny Impact

Cage is defending and has Terminator gear on for an even more intimidating (though slightly goofy) look. Feeling out process to start with Impact moving around as much as he can to avoid the pain but Cage counters a slingshot into an overhead suplex to take control. Some corner clotheslines connect until Impact avoids a charge, setting up a springboard spear for two. Impact’s armbreaker is broken up without much effort and a pair of monkey flips put him in even more trouble.

The chinlock doesn’t last long so Impact goes up, only to get caught with a Cheeky Nandos kick. An electric chair gives Cage two and it’s back to the chinlock. Impact fights up again and sends him outside for the big flip dive off the top, with his knee going right into Cage’s face/chest. Cage is fine enough to hit a superkick into a release German suplex. Impact scores with the Moonlight Drive and they’re both down for a breather. Starship Pain is countered into an F5 for two and we get some NEW CHAMP chants.

A buckle bomb looks to set up Weapon X but Impact reverses into rollup for two. The discus lariat gives Cage a very close near fall so Impact hits a quick Flying Chuck. Starship Pain works this time but Cage is up at two again. The super Spanish Fly doesn’t even get one and it’s a powerbomb into a buckle bomb into a helicopter bomb for two, breaking Cage’s momentum on the near fall.

Weapon X connects for two with Johnny having to get his foot on the rope. Cage gets knocked to the floor and goes after the Survivor contestants (Impact was on the show), meaning the referee has to check on them so Cage’s Drill Claw only gets two. Cage’s apron superplex is countered into something like a DDT for a very close count that is called three to retain the title at 19:12.

Rating: B. They were rocking with some of those near falls and then we had to get the Survivor goofs involved to set up the botched ending really brought things down though and there wasn’t much they could do to recover from things. Cage losing like that didn’t help things very much either either, though they had built up enough good will before then that it didn’t sink things. Good match, though the big problems hold it back a lot.

A furious Cage throws the title at Impact and storms off. Taya comes out to celebrate with an annoyed Johnny but here’s Killer Kross to jump Impact. Kross powerbombs Taya off the stage into the crowd to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a rather good show for the most part with almost everything working at least in some way. Some of the matches weren’t as solid as others and the Knockouts Title left a lot to be desired. There were a few matches and moments that could have been better, but what we got was more than good enough. The problem for this company has always been consistency though, and I’m not exactly thrilled by what we might be getting going forward. It’s a rather good show overall, but it needed a few more steps to be great.

Results

Rich Swann b. Jake Crist, Ethan Page and Trey Miguel – Swann pulled down the title

Su Yung/Allie b. Kiera Hogan/Jordynne Grace – Mandible Claw to Hogan

Eddie Edwards b. Moose – DDT

Sami Callihan b. Willie Mack – Cactus Piledriver

Eli Drake b. Abyss – Paddle to the head

LAX b. Lucha Bros – Superkick to Fenix

Taya Valkyrie b. Tessa Blanchard – Road To Valhalla

Johnny Impact b. Brian Cage – DDT off the ropes

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

205 Live
Date: January 2, 2019
Location: PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson

The title is the focus this week as Cruiserweight Champion Buddy Murphy needs some challengers at the Royal Rumble. He actually needs three of them as Drake Maverick has put him in a fatal four way. That means we’ll be seeing two of three qualifying matches tonight, with the third taking place next week to find the three challengers. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Gene Okerlund.

Drake Maverick hypes up tonight’s qualifying matches and promises a big surprise at some point.

Opening sequence.

Kalisto vs. Lio Rush

The winner goes to the four way. The fans aren’t happy with Rush to start and it’s already time to run the ropes rather quickly. Kalisto’s handstand into a double backflip sends Rush bailing to the floor as Buddy Murphy and Tony Nese watch in the back. Rush comes back in for a slap to the mask and you can see Kalisto getting more serious. The chase is on with Rush swinging around the post so Kalisto uses them as a launch pad to get around the ring faster. A handspring kick to the head knocks Kalisto off the apron and that means a suicide dive as we actually get to the contact.

Back in and Rush snaps off a suplex before a knee to the back gets two. The reverse chinlock goes on for a good while until the cocky Rush sends him outside, setting up a quick rest on the top rope. A running elbow to the face cuts Kalisto down again and Rush snaps off the rapid fire strikes. Kalisto finally stops him with a raised boot in the corner, setting up a springboard flip dive to the floor.

Back in and Rush hits a spinning kick to the face and a second one….doesn’t get anything as Rush heads up top instead. That allows Kalisto a kick to the face of his own and a middle rope fall away slam backflipped into a World’s Strongest Slam (cool) gets two. They take their time getting up and the Salida Del Sol is countered into a spinning Unprettier for two more. Back up and the springboard spinning crossbody barely hits Rush, who kicks Kalisto in the face again.

A TKO onto the top rope sends Kalisto outside for a nine count and Rush’s frustration sets in. Rush loads up the Final Hour but Metalik and Dorado load up the noisemakers for a distraction. For some reason Rush is dumb enough to go after them and the Salida Del Sol sends Kalisto to the Royal Rumble at 14:19.

Rating: C+. The ending was a bit of a stretch but Kalisto winning is always a good idea. He comes off as one of the biggest stars around here and he’s going to make any match better. I wasn’t wild on Rush losing the way he did but he’s got enough going on over on Raw to make up for it. Nice match with a not great ending.

Nigel being annoyed at Kalisto winning is rather amusing.

We look back at last week’s street fight with Akira Tozawa and Brian Kendrick defeating Jack Gallagher and Drew Gulak.

Gulak doesn’t consider himself an underdog against Tozawa tonight because he’s a realist. Tonight isn’t about weapons because it’s a wrestling match.

Drake Maverick promises new faces coming around here in the near year. That may or may not be interesting.

Akira Tozawa vs. Drew Gulak

The winner goes to the Rumble and there are no seconds here. Feeling out process to start with Gulak taking him down in a headlock. Tozawa grabs one of his own but misses a big kick to the face. That seems to make Gulak a bit more serious so he goes after Tozawa’s ear and asks HOW DARE YOU. The quick right hand to the face drops Gulak and we get a Tozawa scream. They head outside with Gulak kicking him into the barricade and slamming the weakened back onto the floor.

We hit the double arm crank with a knee in Tozawa’s back before Gulak switches to a regular chinlock. That doesn’t go far so Tozawa is back up with a spinning kick to the head for two. Gulak gets draped over the middle rope for a Fameasser but Tozawa’s back is banged up again. The delay lets Gulak powerbomb him into the corner and hit a heck of a lariat for two more. Tozawa wins a slugout though and it’s a Black Widow on Gulak, who reverses into a Brock Lock of all things.

The rope breaks the hold and Tozawa is fine enough for a backdrop diver. Tozawa’s knee gives out on top though and he gets pulled down into the Gulock. The hold lasts for more than a few seconds, meaning of course Tozawa can roll over to the ropes for the break. Gulak bails outside and there’s the big suicide dive that you knew was coming. It’s too early for the top rope backsplash though as Gulak is fine enough to crotch him on top. Gulak can’t superplex him from the middle rope and the top rope version is broken up with a headbutt. Now the top rope backsplash can send Tozawa to the Rumble at 17:13.

Rating: B. I liked this more than I was hoping as the old guard of the division continues to roar back. Tozawa is the kind of guy you can move up to the next level anytime you need to and that’s what they did here. Gulak’s fall continues as he never recovered from losing the Cruiserweight Title shots last year. Still though, good match as you almost always get from Gulak.

Brian Kendrick comes in to celebrate as Buddy Murphy and Tony Nese aren’t exactly impressed.

Cedric Alexander isn’t scared of Hideo Itami in next week’s final qualifying match.

Hideo Itami and Ariya Daivari demand RESPECT next week.

Overall Rating: B. This was a wrestling show and that’s where 205 Live tends to shine. They did things well here and made two of the necessary big steps towards the pay per view title match. If they have another great match next week to set up the entire thing, the four way is going to be a blast. I’m also interested in seeing where those new names are going to go. That could be a variety of people either from NXT or elsewhere, and that can shake things up around here, which is often a good idea. Anyway, strong match here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 1998
Date: January 18, 1998
Location: San Jose Arena, San Jose, California
Attendance: 18,542
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the year of Austin and for once, the WWF is looking good going forward as the debacle that was the main event of Starrcade has caused WCW to hit a brick wall. The main event tonight is Shawn defending the title against Taker because he didn’t want to face Owen Hart, the most logical opponent. Also there’s the Rumble, which is obvious of a winner as there’s been in years, but in this case that’s ok. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the two main matches as you would expect. The rest of the card doesn’t mean much anyway.

Mike Tyson is in a skybox.

 

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

 

This is during Goldie’s midlife crisis/PAY ATTENTION TO ME phase. These two had a great match at Clash of the Champions so maybe this won’t suck. Goldust jumps him as Jerry is glad the gold one is in men’s clothing again. Vader shrugs off the shots to the back and chases Goldust to the floor. Vader rams him into Luna as we hear about Austin not being here yet. Goldust is sent into the steps as Vader keeps control.

 

Back in and Luna trips Vader up, finally allowing Goldie to get in a clothesline. Another clothesline puts him down and Goldust works on the leg a bit. Goldie drops a middle rope elbow to the ribs and we head back to the floor. Vader is sent into the steps so Luna can choke him a bit before we head back in. Goldust pounds away again but stops to kiss Vader. I may not be a pro wrestler, but I know better than to kiss a guy called the Rocky Mountain Monster.

 

Vader kills him with a clothesline and suplexes Goldust down before getting two off a splash. Vader loads up the Vader Bomb but a low blow stops him cold. Another clothesline puts Goldie down again and Vader sits on his chest. He loads up the Bomb again and despite Luna jumping in his back, Vader drops it anyway and crushes Goldust for the pin.

 

Rating: D. The place popped for the ending which did look cool, but other than that this was a messed up match. Goldust in this gimmick didn’t really work because at the end of the day, he’s still boring old Dustin Rhodes working the same standard style. It’s not horrible but it’s not a good choice to have on a PPV.

 

Austin gets here and tells Cole to park his truck. Southern Justice (the heel Godwinns) follow him, presumably to jump him.

 

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

 

Minis here with Sunny as the referee. Max Mini (more famous as Mascarita Sagrada) is by far the most famous of these guys as he’s about 4 and a half feet tall but can move around very quickly. Nova and Tarantula start things off with Tarantula (on the heel team) being way bigger. Nova takes him down with some headscissors before it’s quickly off to Batallion (military themed guy) vs. Max. Max armdrags him to the floor which brings in Torito, meaning we’re in lucha rules (meaning sending someone to the floor means another member of your team can come in without an actual tag).

 

Torito can actually get his head over the top rope, meaning he’s just under the size of Rey Mysterio. Mosaic comes in and gets caught in a gorilla press and a release flapjack. A second flapjack attempt is caught in a wrist drag to send Torito to the floor and it’s off to Tarantula. That goes nowhere so here’s Battalion again. The fast tags continue as here’s Nova vs. Torito already.

 

They both hit the floor so Mosaic speeds things up against Battalion again. Mosaic spins him around again a few times before it’s back to Mini vs. Tarantula. Max gets caught in a spinebuster but goes up top almost immediately for a delayed rana. Max sends him to the floor and Tarantula backs off. Back in and Torito hits a Mafia kick to the back of Max’s head and a chop puts him down again.

 

For no apparent reason Sunny picks Max up so he can dropkick the villains. I can only assume Sunny is there to give the fans anything to care about. Mosaic and Battalion go to the floor as does Torito so Max can hit his big dive. The others dive on them as well and it’s a big pile on the floor. Back in Max rolls up Torito for the pin.

 

Rating: C. I’m going with a C because I have no idea what else to go with. I don’t know who these people are, I have no idea why I should care, and I might have seen these guys twice other than this (aside from Max). These matches are really hard to get into because there’s nothing to them. Much like a lot of the luchador matches in WCW had the same issue: why should I care about these people?

 

The Nation goes to attack Austin but only find an Austin foam finger.

 

The McMahons are in Tyson’s sky box.

 

We recap Shamrock vs. Rock. Shamrock has charged through the Nation to get this shot at the unofficial leader of the team. Mark Henry joined the Nation to save Rock from Shamrock less than a week ago.

 

The Nation argues over which of them will win the Rumble. Rock says the fans of course want to know what he thinks of Clinton and Paula Jones, so he tells the President not to lie down with dogs or you might get fleas. This joke would be done way better over the next few weeks.

 

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

 

Rock is defending of course. Feeling out process to start with Rocky trying to get a cheap shot in the corner. Both guys shove the other into the corner and Shamrock blocks a shot to the face before hitting one of his own. They run the ropes a bit until Shamrock kicks him in the chest and knocks the champion out to the floor. Back in and Rock pounds away a bit before hitting a corner clothesline. Ken comes back with some clotheslines of his own but the standing clothesline is countered into a hot shot for two.

 

They’re trying to get out of first gear here but it’s really not working that well. The champ pounds on him in the corner and but gets caught in a fisherman’s suplex for two. Back to the floor with Shamrock going into the steps and then back into the ring. The spinning DDT gets two for Rock and it’s off to the chinlock. Rock tries the spinning DDT again but gets caught in a northern lights suplex for two instead.

 

Shamrock pounds away some more and gets two off a powerslam. The Nation comes out and sneaks Rocky some knuckles whick go upside Ken’s head for two. Rock hides said knuckles in Shamrock’s trunks, just before getting belly to bellied for the pin and the title. Keep that in mind of course.

 

Rating: D+. Rock would get better, but at the end of the day this didn’t work that well. It was mainly punching with both guys trying to throw in a move here or there. This feud never quite worked as well as they were shooting for I don’t think and with Rocky holding the title forever, it didn’t do Shamrock much good either.

 

Post match the referee finds the knuckles and reverses the decision. The referee is beaten up very badly for his efforts.

 

A Coliseum Video Exclusive from “moments later” show a clean and dry Shamrock in jeans attacking the Rock.

 

Los Boricuas attack someone that they think is Austin but find one of the Disciples of Apocalypse. Brawling ensues.

 

We recap the LOD vs. the Outlaws, which is old school vs. new with the Outlaws defending the titles. The Outlaws put a big old beating on the LOD and tonight is their return.

 

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Legion of Doom

 

The Outlaws make fun of the 49ers who lost in the NFC Title game recently to the Packers. The LOD says that Animal’s back is fine and they’re putting the Outlaws on ice tonight. The Outlaws jump the challengers which goes badly in a hurry, as Animal powerbombs the Dogg. The champions try to walk out but get thrown back in so we can start with Hawk (who had one mohawk shaved off earlier in this feud) vs. Roadie.

 

Off to Animal as Road Dogg’s mouth is bleeding. The pounding continues so here’s Hawk for his one wrestling move in the neckbreaker. Gunn gets the tag and Hawk hits a freaking Lou Thesz Press of all things so he can pound away some more. Animal powerslams both Outlaws down and it’s off to a reverse chinlock on Gunn. Hawk comes in for his second surprise move of the match in an STF.

 

That goes nowhere so it’s back to Animal, who is tripped up by Roadie. They head outside where Animal is sent into the steps to finally switch the momentum. Hawk gets double teamed in the ring but clotheslines both Outlaws down (Animal is still legal) but charges into the post. Dogg finds some handcuffs and attaches Hawk to the post, making it a handicap match. Animal makes a comeback with a double clothesline, but Dogg hits him with a chair for the DQ.

 

Rating: D. So with an injury AND his partner tied up on the floor, Animal STILL couldn’t lay down for a pin? Seriously? This match sucked and would have been just slightly better on Raw with less time. The LOD was nothing at this point while the Outlaws were finally starting to turn some heads. Until this point though, they were two jobbers with the titles who kept escaping with them. Brighter days were coming.

The Outlaws destroy Animal until Hawk snaps the handcuffs to make the save.

Some fan wins the Austin truck.

We recap the build up to the Rumble. Basically, everyone knows Austin is going to win and EVERYONE else in the Rumble is trying to stop him but not one has been able to slow him down at all. The only difference here: the fans were eating this stuff up with a spoon.

Royal Rumble

Cactus Jack is #1 and Chainsaw Charlie (Terry Funk) is #2. The intervals are supposed to be two minutes again this year but they would wind up being closer to 90 seconds. Terry brings his chainsaw into the ring so Cactus throws in a bunch of chairs. The referee finally gets the saw out and they pound on each other with chairs. Cactus hits Funk in the head with one, then hands the chair to Funk so he can return the favor. These two aren’t exactly normal if you didn’t catch that.

Tom Brandi is #3 and lasts about ten seconds. Terry punches Jack down but can’t piledrive him on a chair. Cactus suplexes him through two chairs but can’t put him out. Rock is #4 and both hardcore guys are down. Rock pounds on Terry in the corner but Cactus blasts him with a trashcan and the double beating begins. Cactus puts the can over Rock’s head and they pound away on him, knocking him through through ropes and out to the floor. Funk hits Cactus low as Mosh is #5.

Mosh and Funk pair off as do the other two guys. Funk (the announcers are calling him that too) tries a moonsault but it winds up being more of a headbutt than a splash. Phineas Godwinn is #6 and helps Rock beat up Mosh. Not much happens for a bit until 8-Ball of the DOA is #7. Jack misses a charge and Funk backdrops him out to empty the ring out a bit. Apparently someone who might have been Ken Shamrock has attacked Austin.

Funk barely hangs onto the rope to avoid elimination until Blackjack Bradshaw (yes that Bradshaw) is #8 and looking as muscular as you’ll ever see him look. We talk about Mike Tyson while things slow down a bit until Owen Hart is #9. Jeff Jarrett, the NWA North American Champion at the time in a strange invasion angle, attacks Owen on his way in. Yeah this is what Owen gets for not bolting to WCW after the Montreal Screwjob. Yes I know he was under contract but you know Vince couldn’t hold him to it in that situation. Hart can’t get in the ring yet.

Steve Blackman is #10 and he has a hairy chest. 8-Ball piledrives Funk as there are way too many guys in the ring right now. Since people seem content to just tease eliminations on the ropes, no one is eliminated until D’Lo Brown is #11. Rock DESTROYS Blackman in the corner before getting in a fight with his Nation teammate D’Lo. Kurrgan, still a psycho monster at this point, is #12.

Thankfully he gets rid of some people like Mosh and….that’s about it for now. Dang it clear the ring out a little bit already. You’re a monster Kurrgan. Go destroy some villager. Marc Mero is #13, giving us a pop for Sable. Mero pounds away on Blackman in the corner but Kurrgan dumps Steve. Bradshaw pounds on Kurrgan as Rock teases not stomping his teammate before kicking away.

Ken Shamrock is #14 and he immediately kicks Kurrgan down. A big gang takes out Kurrgan as Rock hits the People’s Elbow (not yet named) on Funk. Thrasher is #15, giving us Funk, Rock, Phineas, 8-Ball, Bradshaw, Owen (not in the ring), Brown, Mero, Shamrock and Thrasher, or as they’re collectively known, WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE. Still nothing happens and Mankind is #16, confusing the announcers and immediately punching Funk out.

Shamrock finally gets his hands on the Rock as Mero asks Sable for praise. Goldust is #17 in a silver bodysuit with a thong painted on. A minute or so later he puts out Mankind but there are still way too many people out there. Jeff Jarrett is #18 and Owen runs in to beat him down. A spinwheel kick puts Jeff down, followed by Owen skinning the cat and dumping Jeff. Honky Tonk Man is #19 as HHH (on crutches) and Chyna come to the ring. Rock dumps Shamrock to complete Ken’s humilation tonight.

HHH gets on the apron and cracks Owen with his crutch to knock Hart out as well. Ahmed Johnson is #20, looking as bored as I can remember a wrestler looking in a long time. WAY too many people in the ring again. Mark Henry of the Nation is #21 and JR says Henry is “handling the big Johnson.” There’s no #22 which was supposed to be Skull, but he was jumped earlier remember.

Johnson is dumped out and he still doesn’t look like he cares. He would be gone next month anyway. Phineas is out after a ridiculous 28 minutes. On top of being in too long, he accidentally kicks a referee in the head on the way down, giving him a legit concussion. Kama Mustafa is #23 to give the Nation four members at the moment. We’re just waiting for Austin at this point.

FINALLY the glass shatters at #24 and the roof goes off the place. Austin comes in through the crowd because he’s got ten people waiting on him as he comes in. There go Mero and 8-Ball and things slow down AGAIN, because we need at least ten people in the match at all times for some reason. Henry Godwinn is #25 and nothing happens. Savio Vega is #26, but since we STILL don’t have enough people in the ring at the moment, he brings in the other three Boricuas to beat on Austin.

Thankfully Austin beats them out quickly but doesn’t eliminate anyone. Faarooq is #27 to give us the entire Nation in the ring. He goes right for the other Nation members though as his face turn continues. Not that anyone cares mind you but he is indeed turning. Austin and Rock tumble through the ropes through the floor to brawl a bit because that’s what those two guys do.

Dude Love is #28 to complete the running joke of the match. He immediately puts out Bradshaw as Goldust is on the floor but not eliminated. You can’t see most of the mat because of how many people are in the ring at the moment. Austin pounds on Rock even more with Rock falling to the floor again. Chainz of DOA is #29 as Faarooq puts Brown out. More brawling ensues until Vader completes the field at #30. This gives us a final group of….hang on I need a breath first…..Rock, Thrasher, Goldust, Honky Tonk Man, Mark Henry, Kama, Austin, Henry Godwinn, Vega, Faarooq, Dude Love, Chainz and Vader, or THIRTEEN PEOPLE.

Vader immediately pounds on Goldust and dumps Honky a few seconds later. Austin dumps Thrasher after an insanely too long 28 minutes. Austin puts out Kama to finally clear the ring out a bit. There goes Vega at Austin’s hands as well before Goldust dumps Vader. Godwinn goes out as well before Faarooq puts out Henry. We’re down to Rock, Austin, Love and Faarooq as Chainz was put out by Austin off camera.

The Nation members are thrown together and Rock gets hit by Sweet Shin Music and the double arm DDT. Austin hits Dude low and Faarooq throws Love out. Rock puts out Faarooq to give us Austin vs. Rock. They slug it out and Rock is thrown to the apron. Austin is fine with Stunning him and throwing him out to go on to Wrestlemania where he would claim his destiny.

Rating: D+. Austin was awesome as he always was in 1998, but the rest of this match pretty much sucked. As I said over and over, there were way too many people in there for the most part. Also you had WAY too many people getting time they didn’t deserve. I mean did anyone need to see Phineas, 8-Ball, Bradshaw, D’Lo Brown and Thrasher all getting over 28 minutes? Not much to see here other than Austin and Foley’s funny bit.

Tyson celebrates “Cole Stone” Steve Austin winning the Rumble.

We recap Shawn vs. Undertaker. Basically they feuded extensively in the fall but then after Montreal, Shawn didn’t want to face Owen for a fear of him trying to legit hurt him. Therefore they rehashed Undertaker vs. Shawn for the title here in a casket match. Most of the video here is about the first Cell match, which is still amazing stuff. Oh and one more thing: DX (still just three people at this point) attacked Taker on Raw but Kane had saved his brother, uniting with him for the first time ever. That was six days ago, and remember that a certain Vince Russo is booking.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Like I said, Shawn is defending and this is a casket match. Taker throwing the lights back on makes Shawn jump out of the ring. It’s a brawl to start and Taker immediately grabs Shawn by the throat. Shawn punches his way out of it but jumps into another choke by Taker. An attempt at putting Michaels in the casket doesn’t work, but a backdrop that put Michaels out of action for four and a half years by slamming his spine onto the casket does work.

Shawn slowly gets up and is kicked into the casket but he immediately bounces out. We head back in with Taker missing an elbow but hitting Old School. Shawn gets whipped into the corner for the Flair Flip to the floor, which is probably the last move he needed to do at this point. Back in and Shawn dives into a powerslam but Taker still can’t slam the lid shut. Shawn comes out throwing powder and manages to get a breather. Taker is sent knees first into the steps and Shawn smashes the challenger’s back with the steps.

A piledriver on the steps actually works for Shawn but he’s got a broken back and can’t follow up. HHH whacks Taker with the crutch (where is Owen if he’s so angry?) as Shawn stays in full control. Back in and a jumping back elbow puts Taker down but he fights out of the casket. Shawn neckbreakers Taker before putting on a sleeper which is eventually countered into a Saito Suplex.

The forearm from Shawn sets up the nipup which sets up the top rope elbow. He must be either high as a kite on painkillers or on a huge adrenaline rush to be able to have a match like this at this point. The superkick knocks Taker out cold but Shawn is Shawn and stops for a crotch chop. Taker grabs him by the balls and we head back inside for the beating Shawn deserves. Another Flair Flip sets up the big boot, but Taker misses a clothesline and lands in the casket.

Shawn drops an elbow into the casket, closing the lid on both guys. Cool spot actually. Shawn crawls out but in a semi famous shot, Taker pulls him back into the casket, closing it with both guys inside again. Back in and Undertaker hits one of the biggest chokeslams he’s ever hit followed by a JUMPING TOMBSTONE into the casket. The Outlaws and the Boricuas run in as we reenact Royal Rumble 1994, but here comes Kane to save the day. By save the day, naturally I mean turn on Undertaker and shut him in the casket to keep the title on Shawn and end the match.

Rating: B. Considering Shawn’s back was literally broken in half during the match, this is a pretty awesome fight. When Taker gets ticked off and wants to hurt somebody, he can lay a beating out like few others in the world. Shawn struggling through a match in this condition is nothing short of great, and the fact that he survived Wrestlemania like this as well is perhaps the greatest physical accomplishment of all time.

Post match Kane nails the casket shut and hacks at it with an ax. He pours gasoline inside and LIGHTS IT ON FIRE to end the show. Taker of course would disappear from the casket once it was opened up.

Overall Rating: D. Good main event aside, this was a REALLY dull show overall. 1998 would wind up being an awesome year, but this wasn’t the best start to it in the world. We saw a lot of the relics of the bad times here, but Austin was coming and there was absolutely nothing WCW could do to stop him. This wasn’t a good show at all, but it was a necessary evil to get us to the glory days.

Ratings Comparison

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

Original: B-

Redo: D

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

Original: B-

Redo: C

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

….what in the world was I on back then?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-1998-austin-isnt-a-lock-to-win-please-believe-us/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Ring of Honor
Date: January 2, 2019
Host: Ian Riccaboni

Now this one could be interesting and the focus is going to be on the Women of Honor. Why is that interesting you may ask? Well for once we might actually get to know what is supposed to be interesting about some of them. There are several women in the division, but I’m still not sure what is supposed to make a lot of them stand out. Hopefully we can find some of that out here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with a quick video looking at the division as a whole, plus some of the bigger names over the year.

From Honor Reigns Supreme in Philadelphia.

Tenille Dashwood/Mandy Leon vs. Kelly Klein/Stacy Shadows

This is Dashwood’s in-ring debut and I believe Shadows appeared a few times on TV over the year. Shadows and Leon start things off with Mandy hitting some pretty weak chops to the much bigger Stacy. That just earns her a forearm to the face and it’s off to Dashwood in a hurry. Tenille gets her to miss a charge over the ropes and fires off some kicks, followed by a Stunner to send her throat first into the middle ropes.

Dashwood charges into a boot to the face though and Kelly comes in for a cravate with knees to the face. The headscissors into the Russian legsweep gets Dashwood out of trouble and we take a break. Back with Kelly sending Leon into the corner and kneeing her in the face again. Stacy comes in for more of the same and throws Mandy down by the hair as the boring match continues.

Mandy does the big dive towards the corner but can’t quite get there until a DDT gets her out of trouble. The diving tag brings Dashwood in to clean house, including a shotgun dropkick to send her into the corner. The Taste of Tenille connects and the reverse layout DDT plants Stacy again. Mandy dives on Kelly and the yet to be named Spotlight Kick finishes Stacy at 9:00.

Rating: D. This was every boring tag match that you can imagine with the only good part being Tenille coming in for the big win in the end. I wouldn’t have had her in there against someone like Stacy who Dashwood can’t do a lot against, but maybe they didn’t have anyone else. It wasn’t terrible but it was dull, and that’s worse.

We see the end of Sumie Sakai vs. Kelly Klein for the first Women of Honor Title in a pretty lame ending with Klein kicking out of Sakai’s regular finisher and then getting pinned with a regular DDT. The big celebration is included.

From May 30.

Women’s Title: Sumie Sakai vs. Jenny Rose

Sakai is defending and Rose is another one of those interchangeable women that Ring of Honor thinks is important or interesting because they’ve been around for a while. Sumie takes her into the corner for some fast stomping and Rose is sent outside as we take another early break.

Back with Sakai getting two off a missile dropkick but walking into a side slam for the same. The swinging fisher woman’s suplex gives Sakai two more, only to have Rose spear her through the ropes for a big crash. Back in and a fisherwoman’s suplex drops Sakai for another near fall so Rose snaps off a German suplex. Sakai pops up so Rose spears her down, only to get caught with Smashmouth to retain Sakai’s title at 7:17.

Rating: C. And the problems for the division continue. I’ve been watching Ring of Honor for a good while now and I still couldn’t tell you anything significant about either of these two. Rose trained with Sakai and wants the title. Fine. Now tell me something about Sakai or Rose. Let them have some promo time or a character or something, but what we’re getting right now is just people having not great matches.

From Honor United in the UK on May 27.

Women’s Title: Sumie Sakai vs. Chardonnay

Sumie is defending and shrugs off a cheap shot attempt. That means some stomping in the corner before Chardonnay gets tied in the ring skirt for a quick spanking. Back in and Chardonnay hammers her down before sending it right back to the floor. That means a baseball slide to send Sakai into the barricade but Sumie is right back with chops to the neck. A crossbody off the barricade misses though and Sumie crashes hard.

Chardonnay gets two off a chop and the Boston crab goes on. Sumie grabs the rope and we take a break. Back without much having changed as Chardonnay chokes in the corner and yells at the crowd. Sumie fights back with a running knee and Smashmouth gets two with almost no reaction on the kickout.

A bridging German suplex is good for two more on Chardonnay, who comes back with a spinebuster for the same. Chardonnay’s signature butterfly suplex gets two more but the Tower of London is broken up. Sumie misses her moonsault and gets caught with a running knee to the face for two more. Another butterfly suplex is countered into Smashmouth for the pin to retain at 10:46.

Rating: C-. Chardonnay had a good look and moved well in the ring but the lack of drama and crowd reaction really pulled the energy out of this. Sumie was her usual uninteresting self and that’s not exactly a good thing for a match like this. You can only do so much with these international house shows and this was no exception to the rule. Not terrible, but pretty dry.

From Best In The World.

Sumie Sakai/Jenny Rose/Mayu Iwatani/Tenille Dashwood vs. Hazuki/Kelly Klein/Hana Kimura/Kagetsu

Kagetsu is the Stardom Champion and we get a staredown over the titles. Sakai wants to start for the team and gets kicked in the face by Kugetsu. Well that’ll teach her. Kimura comes in and wants Dashwood, meaning the brawl is on. Before that has a chance to go anywhere, it’s Klein coming in to throw Jenny around. Of course the fourth pairing comes in with Iwatani Sling Blading Hazuki. I might be a bit more excited if you didn’t know the tags were coming as soon as the sequence started.

The villains (Klein’s team in case you get confused by the teams with a bunch of names thrown together because you don’t do your Stardom homework) come in and triple team Sakai with three boots on her face at once, allowing Kimura to hold up the Oedo Tai (stable) sign for a cute visual. Sakai DDTs Klein and the hot tag brings in Dashwood to clean house, including a double Taste of Tenille in the corner.

A high crossbody gets two on Dashwood and Sakai comes back in with a missile dropkick. Everything breaks down again and Sakai gets a guillotine choke on Kimura. That’s muscled into a delayed suplex for two on Sakai but Kagetsu hits Kimura with the sign by mistake. Sumie dives onto a pile and hits a dragon suplex for the pin on Kimura at 10:27.

Rating: C. I say this a lot and I’m going to keep saying it until it’s no longer a problem: I have no idea who these people are and I don’t know why I’m supposed to care about them. It’s a bunch of Stardom talents and some names from Ring of Honor, who I don’t know either for the most part. The division does exist, but it’s not going to go far if I have to do outside research to figure out who these people are or what they’re doing here. Give us some quick videos or translated promos if necessary, but find a way to let us know what’s going on.

Overall Rating: D+. Everything that has been bad about this division since its inception was on full display here: the non-existent characters, the not great wrestling, the matches that just come and go, and the incredible uninteresting Sakai at the top of the division. It’s not the worst thing I’ve ever seen by a mile and there are some perfectly watchable matches at times, but the complete lack of character work kills any positives that could come from the whole thing. Highlighting the year is fine on paper, but was this really the best they could do? Boring show, but it went by quick.

We’re back to the old stomping grounds for Impact Wrestling with a show at the Asylum. Thankfully they don’t seem to be trying anything like a One Night Stand show because egads a flashback night for this company could be a very scary sight. Basically it’s just about the venue and getting back on pay per view, which isn’t the worst thing in the world. Now if only the show can be that good. Let’s get to it.

Willie Mack vs. Sami Callihan

This was added to the show after the go home show and that’s not the worst thing in the world. At least the match was set up on the TV show and it’s not exactly something wedged in. I’m not sure what to think of this one as Callihan is a big heel but Mack has a special kind of charisma that could make him a special deal and I’m not sure you want him to lose a high profile match like this.

I’ll take Callihan though as he’s already a star while Mack is still waiting to get there. Those are two different things and a loss to a prospect instead of someone already established isn’t the best idea for Callihan. Mack can get a lot from the match though and a few weapon shots are likely going to be involved. Callihan wins, but Mack looks good in his big defeat.

Jordynne Grace/Kiera Hogan vs. Su Yung/Allie

Here’s the second match added to the show since Impact and again, it was set up on TV. Hogan is outgunned against Yung and Allie and Grace is someone who was brought in without much to do. I’m not sure how much of a reason she has to be involved in the story but it’s as good as anything else for her. Hogan clearly needs some help here and it’s certainly not the direction I was expecting them to take with the story.

That being said, there’s not much of a reason for Allie and Yung to lose here. That seems to be a long term story instead of anything that can be wrapped up here and they shouldn’t be taking a loss to someone brought into the story this fast. Grace can dominate and Hogan can take the fall, but Yung and Allie need to win to keep Allie hot as a heel. There are several places this story can go and I don’t want to see them getting taken out so soon.

Abyss vs. Eli Drake

This is Monster’s Ball and the story that has made my head hurt since the beginning. Tommy Dreamer was involved early on but then Raven made an appearance on Impact, because again we can’t have a story involving hardcore wrestling without throwing in the ECW tribute again. It’s not like there are hardcore wrestlers from Impact’s past to use in that spot instead, but I’ll cut myself off there.

Normally I would say that Drake has to win here, but you never can tell with something like this. If there’s one thing that Impact Wrestling likes to do, it’s pay tribute to its past. Giving Abyss one last moment of glory here wouldn’t shock me whatsoever, especially if Dreamer and Raven can get in there to help him. Drake is a former World Champion and could be on that level again at the drop of a hat, but he’s been stuck in this story for months now. Just let him win, which is about the bare minimum that he can get from the whole thing.

X-Division Title: Ethan Page vs. Jake Crist vs. Rich Swann vs. Trey Miguel

The title is vacant coming in (because it’s treated like a gift certificate instead of something worth keeping) and this is Ultimate X for old times’ sake. The match is almost guaranteed to be a fun spot fest, though as someone with a fear of heights I’m not exactly looking forward to seeing it come back. There isn’t exactly a clear favorite here as none of them are the biggest stars in the world, but that can make things more interesting.

I don’t see how this can be anyone but Swann, who is the biggest star in the match by a long stretch. Crist is part of a (talented) lackey team and there’s no reason to put him a long way ahead of his brother. Page is still just a guy and I really don’t want to have another reason for Matt Sydal to talk on TV. That leaves Miguel as another option and while I like what I see from him so far, they still need to do a little more with him to make him champion. I wouldn’t lose it if he won the title, but Swann is the safer and smarter pick.

Eddie Edwards vs. Moose

Falls Count Anywhere here, which makes enough sense. This would be the second story involving Raven for some reason. There’s a long backstory here as Moose and Edwards were friends but Moose claims that Edwards didn’t care when he got hurt. Moose came back and turned on Edwards, sending him even further over the edge and into a mental hospital. Edwards got out (with the help of Raven for some reason) and is ready to fight for revenge and the sake of violence.

In theory, Edwards has to win, as the Eddie Is Insane story can only go so much further. It’s been done at this point and Moose is the kind of guy who can absorb a loss. Edwards could be someone who could head back to the top of the card in a hurry as he has all the tools to go there, including the history. It should be a heck of a brawl, but Edwards should (and needs to) come out with the win.

Knockouts Title: Tessa Blanchard(c) vs. Taya Valkyrie

I think I know where this is going and while it’s not surprising, that doesn’t make it any better. Gail Kim is special guest referee here for the sake of her being Gail Kim and there’s a good chance that’s going to play a big role in the finish. Valkyrie has been chasing the title for several months now and Blanchard has escaped with it every time. Blanchard is one of the best stars the division has seen in a long time and while I don’t think it’s time to take the title off of her, something needs to change here.

I’m going with Blanchard retaining here, though through some shenanigans. Either way, I fully expect Kim to show up again and somehow get a title match out of this, as it’s been a long time since we’ve seen her in the title picture. All she did was retire as champion after all and that’s no reason to not make her the focus of the division. The division needs some fresh blood, but as soon as Kim came back in you had to have an idea where things were going. The match should be good, but I’m not thrilled with having Kim there (if that wasn’t clear).

Tag Team Titles: LAX(c) vs. Lucha Bros

This is easily the best looking match on the show and has had a lot of fans drooling for weeks now. The key here has been Konnan, who didn’t want LAX to take the match and has disappeared since. I’m not sure what he’s going to do on Sunday but you have to believe he’s going to show up and do something important in the match. Either way, it’s going to be awesome, which is what matters most.

The Lucha Bros get the titles here, due to a combination of the story going in that direction and LAX being out of teams to fight. They’ve held the titles since June and there’s not much of a reason to keep the belts on them much longer. The Lucha Bros are a big deal right now and have the credibility to win them easily. The big thing here though is seeing an awesome match, which these teams have delivered for months. I’m looking forward to this one and it should be the best on the show.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Johnny Impact(c) vs. Brian Cage

They did what they could to set this up on the go home show and came about as close as possible to making it work. If there’s one thing that this company has never quite been able to pull off, it’s the emotional World Title match and this has been no exception. Impact winning the title was cool but it hasn’t exactly changed anything. There’s something that worries me though and I have a feeling it’s where things are going.

I’m thinking Impact retains, albeit with help from Killer Kross, who has been running around for weeks, offering Impact his help in retaining. Impact has seen Cage’s power up close now and might thing he needs the help, which would be one of the dumbest things they could do. They don’t need to turn Impact heel but the signs seem to be there. Since he’s already beaten Kross in a title match, there’s not much of a point in setting up another match. Kross could help Cage win the match, but does he exactly need the help? I think they’ll go with the ill advised heel turn here, just for the sake of tradition.

Overall Thoughts

Like I said, there’s some potential for some fun here but you never can tell. This hasn’t been the most thrilling build in the world, though the two weeks off for the sake of the Best Of shows didn’t help things. The card looks pretty good and the big matches have been built well. I’m expecting a strong show, though again nothing that is going to make my overall opinion of Impact go up that much. Still though, I’ll take what I can get.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 3, 2019
Location: Sam’s Town Hotel & Gaming Hall, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

It’s the go home show for Homecoming and since the last two weeks have been Best Of shows, they have a lot to do in one night. This week they have to build things up but also catch you up on the storylines. Now the question is how much time they’ll waste on stuff that doesn’t matter. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at every story going on, which is a very smart idea, especially when they can do it in such a short time.

Opening sequence.

Willie Mack/Rich Swann/Rascalz vs. Ethan Page/Matt Sydal/OVE/Sami Callihan

Always nice to pack a few feuds into one match. Jake Crist and Trey Miguel get things going but Xavier comes in off a very early blind tag for a sliding dropkick to the head. Callihan comes in and some rapid fire Rascalz offense in the corner puts him in trouble. The rapid fire tags continue with Swann and Mack getting in some shots of their own as Sami can’t get anything going.

All ten come in for the big brawl until Sami is left alone to clothesline the heck out of Miguel. That’s fine with Trey, who hurricanranas Callihan on the floor, setting up the series of dives. Sydal blocks Dezmond’s dive with a kick to the head so Wentz used Dezmond as a launchpad to take everyone down instead. Jake and Trey head up top and it’s a super cutter to bring Trey onto the pile for the huge crash. Back from a break with Sami holding Trey in a chinlock and handing it off to Dave for some stomping.

Page adds some stomping from the apron as the villains get their revenge for Sami’s beatdown earlier. Sydal comes in for a side slam but an enziguri to Page allows the diving tag to Swann so house can be cleaned. The low superkick into the middle rope 450 gets two on Page and everything breaks down again. The parade of shots to the face ends with Page hitting a scoop brainbuster for two on Swann. Some people are knocked off the top but Mack saves himself and hits a super Stunner on Dave for the pin at 15:23.

Rating: B. This was the indy style insane tag match to the letter and that’s all it needed to be. They were flying around and had a quick heat segment on Trey that lead to the finish. I don’t know what else you could hope for here, as the people involved are going to be in an insane match at Homecoming, so there wasn’t much of a point in doing anything more than a spotfest. It worked perfectly well and I had a good time with it so well done for a long opener.

Post match Sami hits Willie with a ball bat and the All Seeing Eye puts Mack through a table. Swann gets back in to save Mack from a bat shot to the head.

Preview of the rest of the show.

Video on Eddie Edwards vs. Moose. They used to be friends but Moose claimed that Eddie didn’t care when he got hurt. Moose returned and turned on Eddie, sending Eddie completely over the edge and into a mental hospital. Eddie escaped with the help of a random Raven cameo and is swearing revenge on Sunday.

Here’s Eli Drake, carrying an oar, for a chat. Drake talks about all the people he’s gotten rid of, including Joseph Park, Abyss and Tommy Dreamer. Then he has to show up at Homecoming for a Monster’s Ball match, even though there’s no chance Abyss will be there. If Abyss somehow does show up though, it’ll be a few wacks with old paddy and he’ll go away again. Drake is that good and he is hardcore.

Cue Dreamer with a chair to beat Drake down but before he can Pillmanize the neck, the lights go out and Raven appears. Drake tells them to fight but Raven and Dreamer beat him down instead. Callis: “Only in Impact Wrestling will you see these two standing together, even for a moment!” They were Tag Team Champions at one point dude. Also, I have no idea what the point of this was other than to make Dreamer and Raven look good, which seems pretty counterproductive.

Desi Hit Squad vs. Fallah Bahh/KM

Gama Singh dedicates this match to Scarlett Bordeaux so here’s Scarlett to watch. The Squad jumps the distracted Bahh and KM from behind to start but Bahh isn’t having any of this being punched in the head thing. Singh manages to drive him back into the corner for the tag to Raju, allowing some choking in the corner. Scarlett seems impressed as Bahh gets covered for two but doesn’t like Singh attempting a slam and having Bahh fall on him. KM comes in for the roll over the Squad but a jumping knee into a neckbreaker puts KM in trouble. Bahh crossbodies both of them though and sits on Singh’s chest for the pin at 4:51.

Rating: D. It feels like these teams have been fighting for months now. The Bordeaux thing has gone on long enough and she needs to just debut whatever surprise talent she has and be done with it. Her doing those stupid email segments and watching the same people fight over and over has lost its charm and they need to move on already. Oh and fire the Squad. It’s just not going to happen.

The Lucha Bros say LAX aren’t ready to be a real team without Konnan. It won’t be a friendly match on Sunday because it’s going to be about respect and honor.

Allie vs. Kiera Hogan

Why isn’t this at the pay per view? Hogan goes straight at her and stomps away in the corner, followed by a running dropkick to make it even worse. A suicide dive takes out Su Yung but the distraction lets Allie take Hogan down and hammer away. Allie gets to stomp her down in the corner for a change and cuts Kiera down with a clothesline. A big boot gives Kiera two and she kicks Allie in the head again for the same. Allie is right back with the Codebreaker for the fast pin at 4:34.

Rating: D+. This was too short to mean much and I’m not sure if Allie should be beating Kiera clean so soon. I’m not sure where this story actually goes but it could be interesting to see over the next few weeks. Allie is really working as a heel though and while that’s not the biggest surprise in the world, I’m impressed with it given how great she was as a face for so long.

Post match Allie and Su beat up Kiera even more until Jordynne Grace of all people makes the save and wrecks both of them.

Video on Taya Valkyrie vs. Tessa Blanchard, which has gotten Gail Kim involved despite the complete lack of her being needed.

Earlier today, Trevor Lee ranted to Don Callis and Scott D’Amore (not shown) about not being on the show and got a match for his efforts.

LAX always wanted to be pro wrestlers and overcame everything thrown against them over the years. They’re like brothers and the one time Konnan wasn’t in their corner, they lost everything. Now they need to prove that Konnan isn’t the only reason they win. They’re going to make history at Homecoming because they have to prove their worth to themselves and their family. Good fired up promo from the champs.

Trevor Lee vs. Killer Kross

Kross headlocks him to start and Lee’s efforts at a wristlock have no effect. Some kicks just annoy Kross, who stomps Lee down with no effort. The Saito suplex sets up the Krossjacket choke to give Kross the win at 2:34. Total squash.

Post match Kross wishes Johnny Impact luck against Brian Cage on Sunday, even though he feels like he can’t get through to him. He asks if Impact would like to see what happens when diplomacy fails. Kross grabs the timekeeper and pulls out a cinder block of all things. The timekeeper puts the block on Lee’s head in the corner and Kross breaks it with a right hand. That’s it for Lee in the company, and thank goodness they squashed a guy who has been misused in his entire run with the company. There’s your nice sendoff Lee and have fun in AEW.

Homecoming rundown.

GWN Flashback Moment of the Week: Jerry Lynn vs. Sean Waltman from Sacrifice 2005.

Lucha Bros vs. Brian Cage/Johnny Impact

Works for me. Cage shoulders Fenix down to start and catches a handspring without much effort. Pentagon comes in instead and gets caught in a hard German suplex as there’s no answer for Cage so far. It’s off to Impact for a kick to the head from the apron but Pentagon is right back with a Sling Blade. The Backstabber out of the corner keeps Impact down and there’s the big chop in the corner. Fenix comes back in with a missile dropkick for two but Cage knocks him down. A rolling cutter finally stops Cage and Pentagon adds a running flip dive.

Impact is right behind him with an Asai moonsault but Fenix dives onto everyone as we take a break. Back with Impact kicking the Bros down and getting two off a super Spanish Fly to Fenix. The Pentagon Driver plants Johnny and it’s time for the exchange of superkicks and other assorted kicks to the head. Cage discus lariats Impact down by mistake and gets double superkicked to the floor. The spike Fear Factor finishes Impact at 10:34.

Rating: C. This was more storyline than anything else and that’s perfectly fine. Cage and Impact don’t exactly have a great reason to be fighting other than cashing in the title shot so this was as good of an idea as they were going to have. The Lucha Bros winning is fine and it’s not like Impact got pinned clean or anything. Fine from a storyline standpoint and I’ll take a last minute build rather than nothing at all.

Post match Impact and Cage stare each other down. Cage goes to leave but Impact stops him and the fight is on. Referees and security can’t do much so some of the locker room comes out, only to have Johnny walk the ropes for a flip dive onto Cage. They’re finally separated to wrap things up.

A long video on Homecoming, featuring clips from the old days of TNA, ends the show.

Unless I missed something quick, there was no mention of the move to the Pursuit Channel next week.

Overall Rating: C. Pretty good go home show here with the bigger matches getting either a match or a promo to build them up. There are a few things that could have been done better but at least they hit the high points and reminded you what’s coming on Sunday. Homecoming should be another run of the mill Impact pay per view: an entertaining three hours but nothing that is going to stick with you long term because this company doesn’t do stuff that has a lot of staying power.

Results

Willie Mack/Rich Swann/Rascalz b. OVE/Sami Callihan/Ethan Page/Matt Sydal – Super Stunner to Dave Crist

KM/Fallah Bahh b. Desi Hit Squad – Banzai Drop to Singh

Allie b. Kiera Hogan – Codebreaker

Killer Kross b. Trevor Lee – Krossjacket choke

Lucha Bros b. Brian Cage/Johnny Impact – Spike Fear Factor to Impact

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: August 5, 2004
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re getting close to Summerslam and the big story around here is over the US Title with Booker T. winning the title in an eight way match last week. John Cena isn’t happy though and is still coming for Booker and the title, which you have to imagine will take place at Summerslam. Oh and Kurt Angle and Eddie Guerrero still hate each other. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

New General Manager Theodore Long opens the show with pictures of Vince McMahon and Martin Luther King Jr. in his office. One had a vision and the other had a dream but they’ve both made him want to make Smackdown a great show for the fans. If you thought last week’s show was great, you haven’t seen anything yet. Call your friends and knock on your neighbor’s door because we’re starting with a #1 contenders match.

John Cena vs. Rob Van Dam

The winner gets a shot at Booker at some point in the future. They trade waistlocks to start and that’s a clean break. Van Dam slips out of a headscissors of all things and that’s an early standoff. Another clean break gives us a handshake as the fans switch from Van Dam to Cena. Van Dam gets tossed outside where he kicks Cena in the head to take over. Cena is smart enough to get off the barricade before the spinning kick can connect. Now why has no one else ever thought of that?

They fight over a suplex on the apron with Cena suplexing him out to the floor for a nasty landing as we take a break. Back with Cena getting two off a release fisherman’s suplex but Van Dam kicks him in the head again. Another kick to the face keeps Cena in trouble as Booker is cheering both of them on in the back. The split legged moonsault gives Van Dam two and Rolling Thunder is good for the same.

Since it’s been a few minutes since we’ve seen one, Van Dam kicks him in the face and goes up top for….actually a guillotine legdrop instead of the Five Star. Cena grabs a DDT (Why did he stop using that?) for a delayed two of his own. One heck of an elbow to the jaw rocks Van Dam and the ProtoBomb plants him again.

The Shuffle gets two and Cena goes up, which isn’t likely to be a good idea. Indeed Van Dam kicks him in the head and grabs a superplex but Cena reverses into a small package for the pin (the stupid kind where they’re both laying down and then kick their legs up for no reason other than to get to the finish) and the title shot.

Rating: B-. Cena is looking more and more like the guy who could be the next star every time he’s out there. The comedy is starting to take a backseat to the good, quality matches and while this wasn’t a great one, it was solid with Cena helping Van Dam put on a nice performance. A feud with Booker is only going to help him.

We get a show of respect post match.

Long comes in to see Booker and says he and Cena are so equal that one match isn’t enough. There’s going to be a best of five series for the title with the first match taking place at “Summer Games”.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero for a chat, complete with Torrie Wilson, Sable and Dawn Marie in the low rider. All of Kurt Angle’s stuff that Eddie is auctioning off is in the ring and the auction ends tonight. That’s why the women are here: to help raise the value. This includes putting the cast on Torrie and having her sit in the wheelchair so the women can sign the cast. Then we have the signed photo of Angle but Eddie is staring at Sable instead.

The girls autograph that too before Eddie moves on to talking about Angle’s last match. That just happened to be against Eddie at Wrestlemania where Eddie pinned him in a classic. Eddie promises to win again and we see an Olympic themed commercial of Eddie gluing the other runners to their starting blocks to win a Gold Medal of his own.

Rene Dupree vs. Orlando Jordan

I had almost forgotten Jordan existed. Dupree knocks him outside and into the steps to start before throwing right hands inside. Jordan gets thrown to the apron so Dupree can hit the French Tickler. With the dancing done, Dupree turns around into a high crossbody to give Jordan the upset. Yay.

JBL arrives and asks Josh how he’s doing while using hand sanitizer after shaking hands. He’s not afraid of Undertaker you see and is calling him out tonight.

Kurt Angle vs. Charlie Haas

This is Angle’s first match since Wrestlemania with Luther Reigns and Miss Jackie here as well. Feeling out process to start as they trade takedowns and escapes. Angle hits a hiptoss and Haas is right back with an armdrag into an armbar. Another armdrag sends Angle bailing out to the floor and we take an early break.

Back with Haas grabbing a hammerlock but getting snapmared into a chinlock. With the wrestling not getting us very far, Angle starts hammering away in the corner to really take over. Haas grabs a suplex and hammers away in the corner but walks into the belly to belly. The chinlock with a knee in the back goes on before Angle gets frustrated at the repeated kickouts.

A bodyscissors keeps Haas down but he fights up and sends Angle outside for a breather. Back in and Angle goes shoulder first into the post, setting up a springboard twisting ax handle (the announcers are surprised too) to give Haas two. That’s enough for Angle as he picks the ankle but gets sent into the corner. Angle isn’t having that either and takes down the straps, setting up the grapevined ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: B-. This was a good return for Angle as he wasn’t as sharp as he used to be but started to put it together as the match went on. Haas was a smart choice here as Angle is better at everything that Haas can do but Haas can still make him work. Angle is going to get better and better with some more matches, capped off by the big one at Summerslam.

Summerslam rundown.

Raw Rebound.

Tag Team Titles: Basham Brothers vs. Billy Kidman/Paul London

Kidman and London are defending. Danny starts with Kidman but it’s quickly off to London for a double hiptoss. A slingshot legdrop keeps Danny in trouble but Doug pulls Kidman off the apron to take over. Kidman gets dropped ribs first onto the top rope to make things even worse and we hit the bearhug. A kick to the head gives Danny two but Kidman scores with a dropkick and dives over for the tag off to London. Everything breaks down and Kidman uses London’s back as a launchpad for an enziguri. The 450 retains the titles.

Rating: C. Now this is the kind of thing that the champs needed. They had a nice little title defense here against a known team and won clean. Build up the credibility a bit and the reign will feel a little more important. The Bashams are so much better without Shaniqua, as they’ve gone from a joke to an average team, which is quite the upgrade.

John Cena wants you to vote.

Paul Heyman/Heidenreich video.

Rey Mysterio/Spike Dudley vs. Dudley Boyz

A loud Bubba drives Spike into the corner to start and a dropkick to Bubba only hurts Spike’s knee. Rey comes in and Spike walks it off on the floor as you might see something coming here. Mysterio’s springboard moonsault has Bubba in trouble and D-Von charges into a boot in the corner. In a questionable move, Spike tags himself in and missile dropkicks D-Von, only to hurt the knee again.

The distraction lets Bubba gorilla press Rey onto D-Von’s raised knee to bang up the ribs. The bearhug doesn’t last long and Bubba/s big elbow draws a smile. D-Von dives into a raised boot and the springboard seated senton puts Bubba down. Rey has to fight both Dudleys off at the same time with D-Von breaking up the 619. The 3D finishes Mysterio with Spike not being able to get in for the save.

Rating: D+. Just a match here and there’s a good chance that its main purpose was to set up a post match angle. Mysterio losing to both Dudleys in a glorified handicap match is fine and it gets the Dudleys some momentum back, though I’m not sure how interesting a story built around Spike is going to be.

Post match Spike helps Rey up and then turns on him, celebrating with his brothers instead. Spike wants a table and puts Rey through one with a top rope double stomp, setting up villainous posing. Uh, ok. I’m not sure why I’m supposed to care about Spike Dudley as a big villain, but this is somewhat (I think) better than having the Dudleys as the top heels. At least there’s no attempted murder involved.

Here’s JBL in the ring to call out Undertaker. He used to be a Texan but now he’s so glad to have moved to New York City. Now that he’s returned, he was hoping for the hero’s welcome that he deserved but tonight is about business. That’s why he’s calling Undertaker out right here and right now instead of waiting for Summerslam. The gong sounds and, in one of the famous WWE tropes, it’s a mini Taker. Tazz finds it hilarious, calling him the Undertoddler. JBL: “You look a lot bigger on television.”

He gets on his knees to look Undertaker eye to eye and makes a bunch of short jokes before loading the mini Taker up for a Tombstone. The gong goes off again though and the real Undertaker appears. It’s a quick beatdown to set up a Tombstone but Orlando Jordan of all people runs in for the save. Undertaker poses and the mini version does the same, earning a chokeslam to end the show. There were some good lines from JBL but this was eye rolling WWE comedy at its “finest”.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good here and they advanced some stories, there were a few things on here holding it back. The ending segment, along with Spike’s turn, aren’t exactly thrilling stuff and having Jordan be JBL’s lackey is far from interesting. I mean, there’s a reason that I had forgotten Jordan even existed until tonight. There’s some good stuff on here and enough to make the show easy to watch, which is about as you can ask for at times. Hopefully Summerslam is as good as the better half of the build has been, though it’s still not as strong as Raw at the moment.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6