What If Rock Never Went Hollywood?

So a few months ago, I did a few columns where I answered a bunch of questions every week.  It turns out that writing a ten page column in addition to everything else I did was a little insane and I dropped the whole thing.  However, I can always find the time to answer a question or two so I might as well take a shot at it.  This is going to be COMPLETELY informal and I have no idea how often I’ll do it, but if someone asks me a question over on Steel Cage Forums (steelcageforums.com.  Check it out if you haven’t yet as it’s quite good.) or in the comments here that isn’t something that can be answered in a sentence or less, I might do something like this.  So here’s one from the forum:

If The Rock hadn’t left for Hollywood what would the WWE landscape have looked like? Would we have gotten Cena, Batista, Orton etc?

For the sake of simplicity, we’ll assume Rock stays on Smackdown, where he was when he left.

Oh dear this is a big one. In short, yes we would have but at the same time, things would have been a little different. For the sake of sanity, we’ll assume that most things didn’t change for the most part, as it’s almost impossible to guess how things go otherwise. Therefore, the Brand Split would have kept Orton and Batista over on Raw, where they could grow into superstars on their own.

That leaves Cena, who is easily the most interesting case out of everyone here. I’m a pretty strong believe in the concept of the talent rising to the top and Cena would have found something in there eventually. Rock would have been the top star on one of the shows, but Cena was going to sneak in there eventually and become the next big thing in wrestling, but there would have been a delay.

When Cena and Batista won their first World Titles at Wrestlemania XXI, Batista was the bigger star. He might not have had the same longevity, but he was the bigger deal at the time. Assuming he rises to the top of Raw in the same way, that leaves Cena to….I’m not really sure. You can almost guarantee that there’s no JBL title run because no one is buying JBL laying a finger on Rock. As long as Rock doesn’t mock Cena’s rapping and eviscerate him on the mic, Cena could have risen up and become the new anti-authority character, but it would have taken longer.

The other thing to remember about Rock is the same problem that would happen to anyone: eventually he would have cooled off. Rock was a six time WWF Champion by the time he was 29. With Austin gone and HHH boring the life out of everyone, there was no one in Rock’s universe and that can only last so long. It happened to Hogan, it happened to Austin, and it would have happened to Rock too.

At some point he would need someone fresh to face and maybe that’s Cena. I’m not sure how well a passing of the torch match would have gone (because they almost never work) but Rock would have had to do something. You can only dominate people for so long before you start losing momentum. Maybe Batista becomes a rival for Rock later on and one of them moves, leaving Cena to stay off on his own. There are a million ways to go, but Rock would have needed someone fresh to face and that’s really hard to do when Rock was that much ahead of everyone else.

So yeah, the talent would have risen to the top, but Cena would have taken a little longer because it took him a lot longer to become the top star. It would have happened though.




Major League Wrestling Fusion – November 2, 2018: Pair Of Kings

IMG Credit: WWE

Fusion #29
Date: November 2, 2018
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Matt Striker, Tony Schiavone

It’s time to get back to the regular shows this week after last week’s Halloween special. Things could be a little more interesting this time around as the Hart Foundation is back, which should make for a rather different kind of show. Fightland is coming up soon enough too so we should get some build towards the big show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Shane Strickland vs. Tom Lawlor with Low Ki costing Shane the win. Lawlor said he would cash in his World Title shot in February, so Sami Callihan attacked him at a media event while Low Ki watched. As usual with MLW: simple story, but it makes sense and leads to matches I wouldn’t mind seeing.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Konnan for a chat. After sucking up to the crowd, Konnan says a witch named Salina de la Renta kept Pentagon and Rey Fenix from being here so here are Salina and Ricky Martinez to cut him off. Salina isn’t happy with Konnan for stealing her talent so she’s had them deported back to Mexico. Konnan refers to Martinez as Ricky Vega, which doesn’t sit well with him. That’s not cool with Martinez, who Konnan calls an Amish gnome Duck Dynasty reject. Anyway it’s time for a match with Konnan bringing in Martinez’s opponent.

Ricky Martinez vs. Puma King

I’ve heard of King before so this could be interesting. Puma runs him over a few times before rolling into the corner for an enziguri to the floor. That means the dive to take Martinez down again, followed by a high crossbody for two. The expected Salina interference lets Martinez kick the ropes for a low blow and there are the Madison Rayne crotch thrusts to drive Puma into the mat.

Martinez is bleeding from the nose and Puma superkicking him makes things even worse. It doesn’t seem to matter that much though as Martinez hits a Backstabber as Striker explains that a broken nose can mess with your vision. Now isn’t that better than him making insider references and talking about how much people hate him?

The Alberto top rope double stomp (I’m looking forward to that going away) is countered with a superplex and a top rope seated dropkick (that’s a new one) gives Puma two. Martinez is right back up with a super Codebreaker (the Plasma Crunch, an awesome name) for two of his own. They head up again but Martinez’s superplex is countered into a superbomb, followed by la majistral for the pin at 5:09.

Rating: C. I liked this one more than I was expecting with both guys looking good and King getting in a very nice debut. Martinez is little more than a bodyguard but he did well here too with some nice power stuff. Every now and then it’s a lot of fun to have a surprisingly good match and that’s what we got here.

Tommy Dreamer, now in a Randy Savage shirt, says he’s ready to show that he’s still the king of extreme, no matter what Brody King thinks. King has no idea what it takes to really be hardcore but Dreamer has seen the fans through the blood in his eyes, making him get up.

Stokely Hathaway is back at Fightland.

Jason Cade doesn’t think it’s fair that he and Jimmy Yuta are both getting the Middleweight Title shot when he already beat Yuta. Fair point.

Yuta is ready to win the title.

Maxwell Jacob Friedman isn’t happy with the lack of respect around here. He’s cool with letting Yuta and Cade beat each other up and then pin both of them.

Brody King vs. Tommy Dreamer

The much bigger King shoulders him down to start as we hear about Dreamer’s litany of injuries. Dreamer’s right hands don’t have much effect so they head outside (What took them so long?) with Dreamer being thrown into the barricade. Back in and they chop it out with Brody getting the better of it, including a Vader Bomb for two. The front facelock doesn’t last long and King misses the middle rope moonsault to make things even worse.

Back up and they forearm each other a lot until Dreamer snaps off a cutter for two. A swinging Rock Bottom gives King two and Dreamer’s DDT gets the same, albeit with a foot on the ropes for the save this time. With the wrestling not working, Dreamer grabs the cheese grater. The referee picks now to wipe his eyes so it’s a low blow to slow Dreamer down, setting up a piledriver to give King the pin at 7:42.

Rating: D. I’ve made my thoughts on Dreamer clear over the years but at least this wasn’t Dreamer getting a big win or a big push and only consisted of hearing about his injuries again. I can more than live with him in this role, though it was still nothing all that worthwhile. King is good for a role, but I’m not sure how much he can do in matches like this.

We look at the media day attack again.

Lawlor says he’s been beaten down but not beaten. Salina must be scared if she’s sending Callihan after him and all he wants is to get his hands on Low Ki. The gold is the goal, but Low Ki can be the first treasure on the way there.

Fightland rundown, including Callihan vs. Lawlor in a street fight. The show now features about ten matches, most of which we’ll see on TV later.

Callihan thinks Lawlor is stupid for wanting a fight. Anyone else Callihan has set his sights on has gone away and Lawlor will be no different. Lawlor may be an MMA fighter but Callihan can run him over with a car.

Hart Foundation vs. ACH/Marko Stunt/Rich Swann

Stunt is a small guy who is probably shorter than Rey Mysterio. Pillman and ACH start things off as Striker talks about Pillman’s pretty solid training so far. A neckbreaker and spinning shot to the neck have ACH in trouble so he snaps off a dropkick to send Pillman away. Hart comes in (complete with the awesome face) and starts flipping around with Swann. A dropkick puts Hart down for a second but he picks up the pace and snaps off a good looking powerslam.

Stunt comes in and uses Swann as a launchpad for a Codebreaker to Hart, only to dance into the massive (by comparison) Smith. For some reason Stunt tries a slam, earning himself a torture rack. In an impressive power display, Smith launches Stunt at Swann and ACH (I know Stunt is small, but that’s still impressive) and dropkicks him in the back to put all three down. The nip up back to his feet is just a bonus. Hart isn’t cool with this waiting around and moonsaults down onto everyone in a crazy good looking dive.

Back in and Smith slams Stunt down like a toy and puts a boot on the chest for two. An assisted Canadian Destroyer plants Stunt and a top rope moonsault (from the middle of the rope instead of the corner) from Hart crushes him again. Hart makes it even worse with a snapdragon that flips Stunt over in a nasty crash.

Pillman gets two off a Michinoku Driver but Stunt slips out of a suplex and brings in ACH. See, that’s the kind of escape that makes sense because the Harts weren’t really looking to finish him (either not covering or arrogant covers) and Stunt finally tagged almost by accident. That makes the Harts looks careless and doesn’t go too far beyond being realistic. Much better than you get in situations like this a lot of the time.

ACH makes the mistake of going after the illegal Hart and gets dropkicked off the apron. The ensuing double teaming doesn’t last long as ACH rolls over for the tag to Swann for a double Lethal Injection. Swann and ACH hit stereo dives but Stunt’s Asai moonsault is caught in midair and Smith drives him back first into the post. You don’t do that to Swann’s partner so he superkicks the heck out of Smith, followed by a very high frog splash for two on Pillman.

Hart hits a top rope DDT on ACH, leaving Smith to put Stunt on his shoulders for a DOOMSDAY CANADIAN DESTROYER (that actually made my jaw drop). Open Hart Surgery (Spinal Tap) crushes what used to be Stunt….for two as Swann makes the save. Swann kicks Swann and Smith down, followed by the middle rope 450 with Pillman making a save of his own. There are too many Harts though and it’s a powerbomb/Blockbuster combo to finish Swann at 12:14.

Rating: B-. Oh they messed up that ending. The Doomsday Destroyer was one of the coolest moves I’ve seen in a very long time and there was zero reason for the save from Swann. You have Stunt there to take a beating and almost nothing more, so why in the world would you have Swann take the pin here? On the positive side, the Harts continue to be outstanding and one of my favorite things about the roster. It’s a good match with an incredible spot (that looked clean too) but dang they should have gone home a minute earlier.

Overall Rating: C. This is the same kind of show they had a few weeks ago and it worked here too. They weren’t focusing on the main event stories here but they treated what we saw as important. How often do you see shows like this treated as nothing, therefore making everything look bad by comparison? It’s an easy show to watch and I had a good time watching it, especially the main event.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – November 1, 2018: Oh Come On

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: November 1, 2018
Location: Spectrum Center, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson

It’s the final show before Crown Jewel, meaning it’s going to be a lot of focus on that show, again without saying where it actually takes place. In addition to all that though, it would be nice if we could have something fresh for the original content, which has been the case around here lately. That’s a nice way to help the show going forward and hopefully it happens again here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Titus O’Neil vs. Mojo Rawley

They go straight to the power lockup to start with neither being able to get anywhere. Some right hands sends Mojo bailing to the floor and a dog bark fills in the time. Back in and Mojo gets in a shot out of the corner, followed by a hard clothesline. The chinlock goes on, and then the chinlock goes on again to keep things fresh. Titus fights up and drives him into the corner for a splash. Mojo is right back with the clothesline to the floor but Titus calmly comes back in and hits the Clash of the Titus for the pin at 5:04.

Rating: D. I know Mojo isn’t the best guy in the world but egads man, this is how far he’s fallen? You really don’t have anything better for him than losing to Titus on Main Event? Just a few months ago he was on Raw and feuding with a former US Champion. It’s not like he’s that bad and the energy alone should get him some more respect than this.

From Raw.

Here’s Baron Corbin with the Universal Title to say that personally, he wants Reigns to beat leukemia but professionally, he hopes he’s never back on Raw. He likes the feeling of this title on his shoulder…and here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman to interrupt. Corbin starts hyping up the title match but Heyman cuts him off for stealing his shtick. This Friday, history will be made when the Universal Title goes back on Lesnar’s shoulder where it belongs. That’s a guarantee instead of a prediction and you don’t get that very often.

You know something big is happening in the Super Bowl, the Stanley Cup Finals and the Academy Awards, but this time you know for a fact what’s coming. Cue Braun Strowman to say Lesnar is going to get these hands. Corbin tries to separate them and gets powerslammed. Lesnar and Strowman stare each other down until another powerslam leaves Corbin laying. Brock picks up the title and puts it on his shoulder so Corbin gets powerslammed again. That means an F5 for Strowman and Brock poses. Just a hype segment for the title match and it was fine.

We look at Roman Reigns vacating the Universal Title.

We look at Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins winning the Tag Team Titles, followed by Ambrose turning on Rollins in a great angle.

From Raw.

Here’s Rollins without the Tag Team Title to thank the fans for all the support they’ve given Reigns. Last week was a crazy night that ended with him winning half of the Tag Team Titles. Then his best friend turned on him and maybe it was Seth’s fault. Maybe Ambrose couldn’t forgive Seth for four years ago when Rollins did the same thing to him.

The only person who can answer that is Dean himself but if Ambrose doesn’t want to be found, he’s not going to be found. However, Rollins knew he could find Ambrose here so if he wants the spotlight so badly, come out here and get it. Ambrose’s music plays but no one comes out. Ambrose pops up in the crowd without saying anything so Seth says at least he faced Dean like a man when he turned his back on him.

Dean comes down a few steps but still won’t say anything. Seth yells about Dean spitting on them on the most emotional night in the history of the Shield. Dean made it all about himself and now he has the spotlight, plus all of Seth’s attention from now on. With nothing being said, Seth goes up the aisle after him but Dean gets out having never said a word. They’ve got something here and watching Dean and Seth tear into each other could be amazing.

Stills of Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte at Evolution.

B Team vs. Rhyno/Heath Slater

The B Team is still a thing. Who knew? Axel takes Slater into the corner to start but lets him out with a clean break. Slater sends him right back into the corner and does the West Virginia dancing. That actually seems to impress Axel but he runs Slater down anyway. Axel takes him into the corner for some stomping before it’s off to Dallas vs. Rhyno. Dallas gets chinlocked for a bit, followed by a hard whip into the corner.

It’s back to Slater, who also whips him hard into the corner. Rhyno adds some clotheslines but misses a charge in the corner, allowing the hot (I think?) tag to Axel. House is cleaned and the PerfectPlex gets two on Slater with Rhyno making the save. Dallas knocks Rhyno outside and it’s a sunset flip to finish Slater at 5:57.

Rating: D+. It’s almost weird to see Slater and Rhyno as the de facto heels, though it wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world to turn them. It’s not like the division really exists at the moment so throw in a fresh heel team just to put some other teams over. The match was actually fine enough and both teams still have some (albeit low) value.

Video on Kurt Angle, who wants to be the Best in the World.

From Raw.

Here are Kane, because running Knoxville is a part time job at best, and Undertaker for the big closing segment. The fans chant for Undertaker, who says it’s not easy to reach the end. But when the reaper calls, no matter how hard you fight, it’s your time to go. I’ll let it sink in that UNDERTAKER is talking about how you have to go when your time is up. Kane says what started as a whisper has now become a deafening cry.

This Friday at Crown Jewel (minor booing), the Brothers will take the battered souls of DX to the firey gates. It will be the end of DX’s error, but that’s on Friday. Tonight, DX is being summoned to the ring right now to have their souls destroyed. Cue HHH (with glow sticks, because WWE can’t decide if this is supposed to be serious or fun) without Shawn so Kane goes up the ramp after him, allowing Shawn to sneak in and superkick Undertaker. DX bails as Undertaker sits up (after going down from something he shouldn’t fall for) to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. Are you kidding me? You have a (great) World Title match on Smackdown and the setup of another World Title match and it can’t even get some stills? Instead we see clips from two weeks ago and the World Cup video from Angle? That’s more important than the oldest title in WWE? This is how WWE presents Smackdown and then wants us to care about a Raw vs. Smackdown pay per view? Come on people.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2004: Dig That False Hope

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2004
Date: November 14, 2004
Location: Gund Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

Aside from the matches mentioned already, there are two other major matches. First up we have Team Kurt Angle vs. Team Eddie Guerrero to continue their rivalry which started back at Wrestlemania XX. Angle couldn’t take the title from Eddie but became GM of Smackdown, vowing to make Eddie’s life miserable. On top of that we have Undertaker (once again the Dead Man) facing off with Heidenreich, Paul Heyman’s latest monster. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about the seventeen years this show has run already.

The set looks cool here as it’s made of six screens which I guess will act as the Titantron tonight.

Cruiserweight Title: Spike Dudley vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Billy Kidman

Spike is defending and is a heel here. This is one fall to a finish. Kidman hurt Chavo on a Shooting Star Press and seemed to be proud of it, which resulted in a heel turn for him. The other good thing here is that they don’t have to tag. As usual, this doesn’t last long before things break down. Kidman and Spike form a quick alliance, only to have Kidman dropkick the champ out to the floor.

Rey sends Kidman to the floor and it’s off to Rey vs. Chavo, who are still friends at this point. Rey spins Chavo around with a headscissors before Spike sends Rey into the corner and stomps away with some screaming thrown in. Chavo comes back in and a double clothesline puts he and Spike down. With Kidman on the apron, Rey hits a hurricanrana to send him out to the floor in a cool looking spot.

Back in and Rey tries the sitout bulldog on Chavo but Guerrero throws him onto Kidman in a seated senton. Chavo dives on both of them, leaving Spike standing ta….short actually. Anyway the champ dives on all of them but they step aside to let him crash. Chavo finally gets his hands on Billy back in the ring but Spike comes back in to break up a pinfall attempt.

Rey misses a moonsault over Spike’s head and gets thrown to the floor as a result. We get a Tower of Doom with everyone minus Rey involved, so Rey comes in and tries to steal a pin. Rey charges at Kidman but gets caught in a BK Bomb (Sky High) for two but Chavo breaks up the Shooting Star. Spike hits a running headbutt to Rey’s ribs but the Dudley Dog is broken up. The 619 hits Spike but Billy breaks up the West Coast Pop. Chavo hits the Gory Bomb on Spike but Kidman hits a slingshot legdrop on Chavo. Rey takes out Kidman and Spike steals the pin on Chavo to retain.

Rating: B-. Not a great match or anything here but it was fine for an opener. Rey was insanely popular still but Spike keeping the title was a great way to tick off the fans. There’s nothing wrong with a heel winning, as long as the opener fires up the crowd, which this did. Good choice.

Heidenreich is getting fired up by Heyman when Paul goes to get his jacket. Snitsky, another creepy heel of the day, comes in. He says he likes Heidenreich’s poetry and Heidenreich likes what Snitsky does to babies (as in punting them into the crowd). There’s WAY too much deep breathing here. This was almost who Undertaker and Kane fought at Wrestlemania before the company woke up and stuck Orton against Undertaker instead.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian

Shelton, a young, very athletic guy who used to be in a tag team, is defending but the Waterproof Blonde version of Christian’s theme makes him far more awesome. Shelton is at the point in his career when he’s about to get on one of the biggest rolls in years but it never went anywhere past the Intercontinental Title. The champ cranks on the arm to start before they head to the mat. Keeping in mind that Shelton was a legit All-American wrestler, he’s just fine being on the mat with Christian.

Christian cranks on the arm but Shelton drops to the mat and immediately nips up which looked great. It didn’t do anything but it looked great. Christian talks trash and gets punched in the face for his efforts. Shelton skins the cat before hitting a great looking springboard clothesline for two. A HARD chop slows Benjamin down and Christian talks some more trash. Shelton counters a monkey flip by casually landing on his feet and grabs an Oklahoma Roll for two.

We head to the floor for a quick distraction by Tomko (Christian’s bodyguard) but Christian gets punched in the face instead. Tomko tries to cheat again and this time the distraction is enough to let Christian get in a shot. Why that creepy little bas…..never mind. A cross body gets two for Shelton but Christian immediately puts him back down with a neckbreaker. Off to a chinlock (Tomko: “BREAK HIS NECK!”) by Christian and he launches Benjamin to the floor as he tries to break the hold.

Shelton comes back with a hard whip into the corner to put Christian down. A Russian legsweep gets two for the champ as does a slingshot reverse suplex (called a reverse fisherman’s suplex by JR). Benjamin misses a Stinger Splash and gets caught in a reverse DDT for two. Tomko slides the belt in (hitting the referee in the foot in the process) but Shelton kicks Christian in the face.

The referee sees Christian holding the belt, which lets Benjamin hit a top rope clothesline for two. As the belt is being put out, Tomko kicks Benjamin in the face for two. The Exploder Suplex (Benjamin’s finisher, a snap floatover T-Bone suplex) is countered but Benjamin kicks Tomko down. The Unprettier is countered into the Exploder for the pin to keep the title on Benjamin.

Rating: B. I really got into this match at the end even though Christian didn’t have much of a chance at winning. The Tomko and belt stuff didn’t help anything but they had to try to slow Shelton down a bit. Benjamin was in the beginning of a very long run with the belt that would last until June, which was the longest reign in about six years.

Really good match here as Christian put Shelton over strong. There’s a reason this guy basically had the world title waiting for him on a plate whenever he stepped up enough to take it, but that never happened for various reasons. Namely he just stopped trying and coasted on his reputation, but that’s another story.

Angle complains to Edge about something Edge wrote in his book about him. Kurt makes fun of Edge for never winning the World Title. They trade some insults before Kurt leaves and runs into Eugene, Eric Bischoff’s mentally slow nephew who just happened to be a talented wrestler. Eugene lists off (slowly) some of Angle’s accomplishments before singing the You Suck version of his theme song.

Team Angle vs. Team Guerrero

Kurt Angle, Carlito Caribbean Cool, Luther Reigns, Mark Jindrak

Eddie Guerrero, John Cena, Rob Van Dam, Big Show

Eddie and Angle have been feuding since Wrestlemania. Carlito, the son of a Puerto Rican legend, debuted and beat Cena for the US Title before injuring Cena in a nightclub (or having someone do it. The attacker was never revealed but it might have been Carlito’s buddy Jesus). Big Show is feuding with Reigns (an enforcer type character) and Jindrak (a very athletic guy who didn’t do much in America) and Angle for shaving his head, and Van Dam is there as a warm body. Got all that?

Before the bell, Cena chases Carlito and Jesus to the back and gets in a brawl with them. Carlito and Jesus steal a car and speed away, which counts as an elimination. Back at ringside there’s a big brawl until Show (on a bad ankle) pulls Jindrak into the ring. Here’s Cena back to the ring to make it 4-3. Off to Van Dam who hits a spin kick before it’s off to Eddie for the slingshot hilo, followed by Rolling Thunder from Van Dam.

Eddie suplexes Jindrak down and armdrags Reigns as he headscissors Jindrak in a cool move. Angle comes in to stop his team’s bleeding but it’s quickly back to Reigns for a bunch of backbreakers for two. Off to Jindrak for a full nelson but Eddie sends him into the buckle. Eddie dives for the corner but Angle literally tackles Guerrero to break it up. Kurt hits a belly to belly before bringing in Reigns for more stomping.

Off to a chinlock from Jindrak but Eddie eventually grabs a jawbreaker to escape. Angle again blocks the tag and puts on a front facelock. One thing to note here: the entire time the hold is on, Cena is reaching out for a tag and encouraging Eddie. It doesn’t mean much, but it helps things from getting really boring. Little things like that can make a big difference. Watch guys like Rock and Hogan when they’re on the apron in tag matches. They’re ALWAYS doing something, even if it’s minor like clapping. It can make a difference.

Jindrak comes in but Eddie knocks him away and it’s off to Van Dam. Rob goes off (Cole: “He’s supple!”) and hits an enziguri on Angle to set up the Five Star but Jindrak pulls him away. The Splash hits Jindrak, allowing Angle to roll up Rob (using the ropes) for the pin. Angle heads to the floor so Eddie rolls up the illegal Jindrak, using the ropes as well, for an elimination to make it 3-2 (Eddie/Show/Cena vs. Reigns/Angle).

Eddie tells Angle to bring it on and there go the straps. Eddie tags in Show, making Angle tag in Reigns. Reigns gets in one or two shots but a chokeslam beats him quickly. Kurt rolls through a chokeslam into the ankle lock but Show sends him through the ropes to escape. Angle starts to walk up the aisle but Van Dam is waiting on him. Kurt backs up while still looking at RVD, and backs into Show. He reaches up to see how tall what he backed into is and shakes his head. Show throws Kurt back in to face Cena (in for the first time legally) and it’s an FU and Frog Splash for the final elimination.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t a good match but it was entertaining, which is more than you got from almost all of last year’s show. I’m guessing Cena and Carlito were injured as they didn’t do anything for the most part. Angle was great here and the look on his face when he backed into Big Show always makes me chuckle. Fun match here, which is all you need sometimes.

Maven (the first Tough Enough winner and on Team Orton tonight in the biggest match of his career) offers to demonstrate his skills to Coach but Snitsky jumps Maven and busts him open. This would be how they would keep Maven out of a PPV main event for most of the match when they realized that he was in WAY over his head.

Video on Heidenreich vs. Undertaker, where Heidenreich is the latest guy to try to kill Undertaker at Paul Heyman’s direction. This was one of those matches where they were trying to make it seem like Undertaker was in trouble but Heidenreich comes off like the villain in the fifth direct to video sequel in a horror series that has overstayed its welcome by two movies.

Heidenreich vs. Undertaker

Heidenreich comes out in a straightjacket because he might attack more plants, as had been his custom in recent weeks. Undertaker does the big long entrance to get the crowd back into things. He stares at Heidenreich for a few moments before the beating begins. A charge in the corner runs into a Heidenreich elbow but the Dead Man will have none of this being on defense stuff. Undertaker works on the arm but a Heyman distraction lets Heidenreich crotch Undertaker to break up Old School. He crotches Undertaker against the post again and we head to the floor.

Heidenreich pounds away on Undertaker against the barricade while shouting that he can beat him. Undertaker shrugs that off again and hits the legdrop on the apron for two. Old School hits the second time followed by a modified Downward Spiral for two. A big boot misses Heidenreich in the corner and it’s time for more punching on the floor. This isn’t one of those matches where the fans are worried about Undertaker as I don’t think anyone bought Heidenreich as a real threat.

A kick to Undertaker’s face sets up a chinlock and a clothesline for two. Another clothesline stops Undertaker’s comeback but a suplex stops the stopping of the comeback. Heidenreich sends him to the apron but Undertaker stuns him on the top rope. Undertaker channels his inner Kane (he had the name first) and hits a top rope clothesline for two. Back in and Snake Eyes/the big boot takes Heidenreich down again.

The chokeslam is broken up and Heidenreich gets two off a Boss Man Slam. Then like an idiot, Heidenreich punches away in the corner while Undertaker arms are down. The obvious Last Ride only gets two though as Heidenreich grabs the rope. Heidenreich tries a sleeper but Undertaker is like boy please and suplexes out of it almost immediately. The chokeslam and Tombstone finish this quick.

Rating: D. Like I said at the end of the day, did ANYONE buy Heidenreich as a real threat to Undertaker? The guy just wasn’t that good and he came off as more silly than a serious threat. Not much to see here and Heidenreich never got higher than he did in this match. Undertaker would move on to a much better feud with Orton soon enough to try and make people forget about this mess.

Bischoff says Maven is out of the main event and if he allows Orton to add a replacement, HHH will complain and Eric will lose his vacation, which is the point of the main event.

We recap Trish vs. Lita, which is happening because….well who else are they going to fight? Lita got pregnant with Kane’s baby but lost it because of Snitsky. Trish made fun of Lita for being a sl**, having a dead baby, and of course for being fat.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Trish is defending. Lita is all ticked off and punches Trish, who is coming in with a broken nose, as soon as she gets in. Trish gets pounded even more and they head to the floor where Trish goes into a table and gets cracked with a chair 80 seconds into the match for the DQ. This wasn’t much, but these two would main event Raw in a few weeks. I don’t mean a match that went on last and then they had the promo that closed the show. I mean they spent the whole show hyping up Trish Stratus vs. Lita as the main event and Lita won the title and celebrated to end the show. It was quite the moment and a big deal.

Teddy comes in to congratulate Team Guerrero while Show is in a towel. Show hands the towel to Teddy and walks off. Cena: “THAT’S DISGUSTING!” Teddy makes Cena vs. Carlito for the title on Thursday. Why is Cena in his underwear?

We recap Booker T vs. JBL. Booker pinned JBL in a tag match but JBL says Booker isn’t in his league. Booker beat up Orlando Jordan (JBL’s lackey) and pinned him to earn the title shot. There really isn’t much to this one.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T

JBL is defending and Booker’s big yellow gloves don’t really do him any favors. Feeling out process to start as they trade really basic stuff for the first minute and a half. Booker knocks him to the floor and JBL gets the advantage coming back in. Back to the floor and Booker gets sent over the announce table. As they head back in, Jordan gets in a cheap shot to give JBL two. Still in first gear at best.

JBL hooks in a cobra clutch followed by an elbow drop and a chinlock. After that VICIOUS offense, Booker easily fights back and hits a superplex to put both guys down. Orlando gets in some more cheap shots on the floor but JBL walks into a Book End out there to give Booker his first real advantage. Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Booker. They’re into second gear now but it’s just not an interesting match.

Booker goes up but another Jordan distraction lets JBL avoid a Houston Hangover (flip legdrop). Another sleeper by JBL is escaped but Jordan breaks up the ax kick. JBL hits a quick DDT for two and there goes the referee. Jordan comes in and pounds on Booker but Josh Matthews comes out to help Booker for reasons that aren’t important enough to explain. JBL destroys Josh but there’s the side kick to JBL. The ax kick takes him down as well but Jordan takes out the referee. Booker hits the Book End on Jordan but JBL clocks Booker with the belt to retain.

Rating: D. This just didn’t work. Basically they were redoing the HHH/Flair run from 2003 with Jordan interfering every ten seconds and the matches sucking and the crowd groaning when JBL retains the title. JBL is a hilarious commentator and a solid main event jobber, but the guy was painfully boring as champion.

Batista and HHH are ready for the main event.

We recap the main event which is Team HHH vs. Team Orton. Team Orton has united to oppose HHH’s tyranny and the winning team gets to run Raw for a week each. Snitsky has said that when Team HHH wins, he’s coming for HHH’s World Title, and Edge has said the same. Batista has been looking at the title too so HHH is rather nervous. This gets the music video treatment for the night. Maven and Snitsky stick out like two shattered thumbs in this whole thing.

Team HHH vs. Team Orton

HHH, Edge, Batista, Gene Snitsky

Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Maven

HHH is World Champion and Maven isn’t here due to the earlier attack. It’s interesting to think that it would be Batista rather than Orton that would rise up out of this match as the real star. Not that Orton isn’t a star, but Batista was without a doubt the biggest star in the company in 2005 and part of 2006. For some reason Edge comes out last. Benoit vs. Edge to start which is fine with me. Benoit destroys Edge and knocks him to the floor to start but it’s off to Orton vs. Snitsky.

Orton pounds him down with ease before it’s Jericho in off the tag. HHH comes in but Jericho immediately elbows him down and brings in Orton to no response. Orton can’t challenge for the World Title because of some stipulation due to losing to Flair. What a great way to make sure the fans get behind him there right? It doesn’t matter how awesome he is because he’s not getting a shot at anything.

Batista comes in and has some better luck with Randy, firing off shoulders into the corner. Edge is in now and he mocks Orton’s pose in an often done bit. Edge draws in Jericho for no apparent reason, but it allows Orton to clothesline Edge back down. Off to Benoit as the fans are dead for this match. It couldn’t be because Orton is a lame duck and everyone knows it of course. Benoit cleans house and suplexes everyone in sight. Edge prevents a swan dive onto HHH, so HHH suplexes Edge onto HHH and swan dives both of them for two.

Everything breaks down even more and HHH gets caught in the Sharpshooter by Benoit. Snitsky makes the save and Edge gets caught in the Crossface. This time Batista saves, allowing HHH to Pedigree Benoit and give Edge the pin for the elimination. Jericho comes in to pound away on Edge but HHH and Snitsky get in an argument. Batista comes to HHH’s defense but has to break up the Walls on HHH instead.

Flair trips up Jericho and gets ejected for his efforts. Flair walks up the aisle but comes back a second later to allow Batista to kill Orton and Jericho. There’s the spinebuster to Jericho but Orton hits Big Dave with the belt, allowing Jericho to hit the enziguri on Batista for the pin. Jericho hits the springboard dropkick to knock Snitsky onto HHH on the floor but Batista kills Jericho with the clothesline before leaving.

It’s Snitsky vs. Jericho with Snitsky choking away. Edge comes in and pounds on his fellow Canadian but gets caught in the sleeper drop to put both guys down. Orton gets shoved to the floor and Edge and HHH double team him for a bit. Jericho DDTs Snitsky down….and here comes Maven. He goes right after Snitsky and takes him down with a forearm as things seem to go into slow motion.

Maven bulldogs HHH down and is all fired up, but Snitsky kills him with a chair shot for a DQ. HHH covers the dead Maven for the easy elimination. Edge keeps covering Jericho but can’t get more than a bunch of two’s. It’s Orton/Jericho vs. HHH/Edge now. A spear puts Jericho out and it’s 2-1 (HHH/Edge vs. Orton) with Orton in trouble. Orton says bring it on and is promptly beaten down in the corner.

Edge suplexes Orton down and holds him while HHH pounds away. Orton punches at HHH but gets DDT’d down for two. Edge comes back in and gets slammed down before getting dropkicked into HHH on the apron. That gets two off a rollup from Orton but he walks into a HHH spinebuster. We get the required heel miscommunication as Edge spears HHH down and walks into an RKO for the pin. It’s down to Orton vs. HHH with the champ hitting Orton low as Edge leaves. The Pedigree is countered into the RKO for the final pin.

Rating: B. The match was good stuff but as I said earlier, Orton pinning HHH doesn’t mean anything. Somehow Orton would get a title match at the Rumble where HHH would destroy Orton once and for all. I think I’m the only person on the planet that liked Orton’s first main event face run so I dug this at the time. It turned out they got lucky with Batista, but the Orton face run could have been more if HHH hadn’t hacked its legs off.

Overall Rating: B-. There’s some dull stuff here, but the good stuff really is solid as you can see the new generation ready to burst through. The main event was entertaining stuff and the fans did react to Orton pinning HHH clean. The Smackdown side of things was pretty lame but other than that, this was a solid show and I was digging it at the end. Good show.

Ratings Comparison

Spike Dudley vs. Billy Kidman vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian

Original: B

Redo: B

Team Guerrero vs. Team Angle

Original: D

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. Heidenreich

Original: D

Redo: D

Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T

Original: F

Redo: D

Team Orton vs. Team HHH

Original: B-

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B-

In a rare instance, I liked this a lot better the second time around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/13/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2004-eyebrows-huffman-main-events/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Monday Night Raw – July 12, 1999: Now That’s A Blood Feud

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 12, 1999
Location: Freedom Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Attendance: 14,573
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on Fully Loaded and that means we need a card, though I’d settle for things slowing down a bit so I can keep track of what’s going on around here. The shows are at their usual breakneck pace and that means very little can make an impact. Undertaker vs. Steve Austin is rolling along, though the battle over DX doesn’t have quite the same steam. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Austin to open things up with a contract in his pocket. His attorneys (Austin shouldn’t have attorneys) have drawn up a contract for a first blood match at Fully Loaded so Vince can come out here and sign it. Here’s Vince in a wheelchair, after having been in a car wreck on the Fourth of July. As you might expect, WWE doesn’t explain why he was fine last week on the fifth of July. Vince is hesitant to sign as he needs to pull out his glasses first. There’s something fishy here though so Austin has to sign it first.

That’s fine with Austin, though he wants back a certain piece of property: the Smoking Skull belt. Vince doesn’t seem to know what to do so violence is threatened. Before anything happens, Kane’s music goes off and Austin looks at the entrance, only to have Undertaker come up from behind with the Smoking Skull belt to the head. You can see Austin blading so the blood is flowing in a hurry. Vince pulls out a pen and has Undertaker fill it with Austin’s blood so the contract can be signed. Cool visual, if not a little over the top.

Post break Austin tells the medics to hurry up because he has stuff to do tonight.

Edge vs. Gangrel

Gangrel tries a cheap shot but gets punched down for his efforts. Some more right hands in the corner have Gangrel in more trouble so he bails to the floor, only to get caught with a baseball slide. Back in and Edge’s top rope hurricanrana is countered into a sitout powerbomb in a good looking landing. Gangrel hammers away as JR is doing a very solid job of pushing this as a battle of two people who actually matter. You don’t get that enough in modern times as the wrestlers are often ignored for the sake of anything else the announcers can do to waste time.

Gangrel gets two off a DDT and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long as Gangrel goes up top so Edge catches him with a neckbreaker back down. A spear connects for no cover as Gangrel heads up the ramp, where the circle of fire is still on the stage. Gangrel actually wins the slugout and knocks Edge through the hole and that’s the match.

Rating: C-. This was actually a perfectly fine little match until the lame ending. My guess is this is going to set up some bad gimmick match involving fire and blood, but it’s a good sign that they’ve figured out to push Edge as the star of the team. The fans have taken to him and it’s a smart move to break up the trio and go with what is almost guaranteed to work.

Austin tells the doctor to get him fixed up because he has violence to tend to tonight.

Jesse Ventura will be at Summerslam.

DX’s music plays but we cut to the back where Road Dogg and X-Pac tar and feather the Fink for turning them into the cops last week. X-Pac talks about Billy Gunn and Chyna wanting the rights to DX, so they can come try to take it at Fully Loaded. Road Dogg isn’t happy either but here’s Kane (actually here this time) to cut them off. X-Pac gets straight to the point and wants to know what Kane’s deal is.

He’s letting Undertaker manipulate him again and if Kane is having anything to do with Undertaker, X-Pac is out. Cue HHH, Chyna and Billy Gunn to beat them down, drawing in Undertaker for the save. Undertaker gets in Kane’s face and says he’d never ask his brother to change. X-Pac isn’t sure what to think as Undertaker leaves. Kane walks halfway to Undertaker but stops without making his intentions clear. For this era, that’s putting the brakes on for a change and taking their time.

Godfather/Val Venis vs. Hardy Boyz

Godfather and Venis are challenging after costing the Hardys a match last night on Heat. Before the match, Venis says he’s like Mick Foley: hard to beat and never wanting to stay down. Val gets driven into the corner to start and Jeff takes his shirt off for his own hip swiveling. An atomic drop gets Val out of trouble and it’s off to Godfather for a Death Valley Driver into the Money Shot, drawing in Michael Hayes with a belt shot to the back for the DQ.

The Hardys pose on the ramp and get jumped by the Acolytes with Venis and Godfather making the save for no logical reason.

HHH, Chyna and Gunn say they’re the real DX and they own everything associated with the team. A six person tag is set up for tonight.

Tori video, featuring her disrobed on a bed with words like Passion written on her. Ok then.

Here are Jeff Jarrett and Debra for a chat. Jeff wants more respect from the fans or Debra and the puppies are staying in his doghouse. This brings out Austin, with a huge bandage wrapped around his head, for a Stunner to get rid of Jeff. Austin wants Undertaker tonight with no rules and no referee with anything going. Instead he gets Big Show, who says if Austin wants Undertaker, he’ll have to face Kane as well. Since that’s the case, Show might as well team up with Austin to fight the monsters. Austin seems cool with the idea and goes to leave so Jarrett gets back up, only to take another Stunner.

HHH/Chyna/Billy Gunn vs. Road Dogg/X-Pac/Kane

Actually hang on as there’s no Kane. HHH offers to let them walk right now if they give up the rights to DX but X-Pac isn’t going there. Instead, here’s a replacement.

HHH/Chyna/Billy Gunn vs. Road Dogg/X-Pac/The Rock

Well that works for a tag partner. Rock hammers away on HHH in the corner to start and runs him over with the clothesline. The jumping knee to the face cuts Rock off and HHH hammers away in the corner. Rock’s swinging neckbreaker gets him out of trouble so Gunn makes a save and knocks Rock outside. That means a beating for Rock on the floor because they’ve done enough wrestling here so far.

Back in and Gunn hammers away on Rock but the Stinger Splash misses. The beating continues, which is quite the odd idea as you would expect Rock to be the one on the apron for the hot tag. HHH comes back in for the sleeper and takes it to the mat to slow things down. Back up and Rock Samoan drops his way to freedom and it’s the hot tag to Dogg (kind of an odd choice) for snap jabs to everyone.

The pumphandle slam (with the hip thrusts that would get Dogg fired today) hits Gunn and Chyna gets punched in the jaw as everything breaks down. The X-Factor gets two on Gunn and the saving HHH is knocked to the floor. Rock is fine enough to hit the People’s Elbow for the pin on Gunn.

Rating: D+. Somehow that’s one of the best matches the show has had in a little while, mainly because of the (slightly) extended time the match received. It also helps having the bigger stars in there, but I can’t shake the feeling of barely knowing what’s going on. Everything moves so fast around here that even the bigger matches like this feel like they just come and go. That’s not good and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better anytime soon.

Droz is ready for an evening gown match, but first he has to wax his bikini line.

Undertaker is talking to Kane in the back.

Droz vs. Al Snow

Non-title and an Evening Gown match because that’s funny. Actually hang on as Snow wants this to be a HARDCORE Evening Gown match. How an Evening Gown match has DQ’s and countouts in the first place isn’t clear but neither is the sanity in this whole thing. Droz hits him in the head with some piece of metal and it’s already time for the table. The powder to the face gets Snow out of trouble….and there’s a breast lock. I’ll let you figure that one out as Snow finds tongs. One grab to Droz is enough for Snow to strip him for the win. I think this speaks for itself.

Post match, Snow caves his head in with a chair shot and then puts Droz through the table. We’re not done yet though as Prince Albert comes out with a hammer and drives a railroad spike into Head.

Earlier today, a very country sounding doctor tells Mark Henry that his blood pressure is 190/120.

Here are the Acolytes, who are scheduled to face Henry and D’Lo Brown, to call Henry and Brown cowards. They want replacements for a fight RIGHT NOW…and here’s Hardcore Holly. He says he’s the Big Shot as a fan tells them to “kiss and make love”. Holly slaps Bradshaw and the beatdown is on. The Acolytes destroy him with ease until Holly kicks the steps into Faarooq’s face. Cue the Big Show for a save and to carry Holly to the back, even though Holly says he had them.

On GTV, Joey Abs hits on Stephanie McMahon but gets shut down.

Test vs. Mean Street Posse

Gauntlet match. Test beats them up before the bell and drops an elbow on Pete Gas for the pin in what I’d presume is a hurry. Gas gets in a low blow before he leaves so Rodney comes in and gets powerbombed. The big boot and pumphandle powerslam finish Rodney so Joey is the last man in. Some shots in the corner are shrugged off and Test hits a powerslam, drawing in Shane for the brawl. Now it’s Steve Blackman coming to the ring to take Test apart as the match is thrown out somewhere in there, though it was much more a segment than anything else.

Ken Shamrock comes in to go after Blackman, who runs into the crowd. The Posse gets back up and wrap a chair around Test’s ankle. Stephanie runs in as well to go after Shane, who elbows her in the face by mistake. Shane panics and carries her to the back like Superman carrying Supergirl. You know that’s how they think of each other.

Back from a break and we look at Shane elbowing Stephanie, making it seem like she got shot.

Shamrock and Blackman fought even more during the break.

Undertaker says he and Kane are together again because blood is thicker than water. Speaking of blood, he’s busting Austin open and might even drink from the cut. Kane had his back to the camera and never said anything.

In something I’ve been waiting on, the COUNTDOWN TO THE MILLENNIUM clock appears. I would say it’s a big deal if you’re not familiar with it….but does anyone not know what that is?

Undertaker/Kane vs. Big Show/Steve Austin

The fight is on before Austin is here so you can imagine the chants. My guess would be WE WANT FISH but the glass shatters before I can be sure. Austin, who looks so strange with his head bandaged, chokes Undertaker on the ramp while the other two giants fight at ringside. As JR is in awe of Show’s hands, Undertaker throws Austin off the stage in a bump we don’t see. But did you know Show’s hands are like typewriters???

Austin gets backdropped on the floor and Undertaker hits him in the ribs with a lighting structure. Some choking puts Undertaker down but Austin takes him to the ring for the Thesz press. With Kane and Show nowhere to be seen (and they’re hard to miss), Austin unhooks a turnbuckle pad and hammers away with right hands in the corner. Everyone is back now and it’s Undertaker and Austin brawling on the floor all over again.

Show chokeslams Kane as Austin and Undertaker get inside as well with Undertaker breaking up a cover. Yes a cover, because they’re pretending this is a wrestling match. Kane pops back up with a wrench to Show’s back and it’s time for some double choking on Austin. There’s a chokeslam on Austin and the bandage comes off in the process.

That’s good for two with Show making the save so Undertaker chokes Austin some more. A chair shot misses though and Austin drops Undertaker but Kane beats him up in the corner. Austin is busted open again but snaps off a Stunner to put Kane away as Undertaker watches from the ramp.

Rating: C. I don’t know what this was as a match but it was an entertaining brawl and that’s what they were going for. Or given how insane this show has been for a long time now, you never can quite tell. The violence was good and they did a good job with Undertaker vs. Austin, though Show and Kane were just kind of there on the side. To be fair though, that’s the point of a tag match like this.

Overall Rating: D. I know this is the dark period you have to get through before you get to the great stuff next year but egads these shows are just hard to watch. It’s not so much that the shows are terrible (though they’re not great) but they’re just so all over the place with some dumb, dumb stuff (Droz vs. Snow jumps off the page) and stuff that feels like it’s just filler (Show helping Holly and then teaming with Austin?) that it’s hard to defend the things. They’re not the worst, but my goodness these things are such messes.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – June 3, 2004: Stop Pointing Out The Problem

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: June 3, 2004
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re less than a month away from Great American Bash and the show continues to look weaker and weaker every single night. The big story tonight seems to be Paul Heyman and the Dudley Boyz kidnapping Paul Bearer in their continued attempt to make an impact. Other than that, JBL gets to pick his stipulation for the pay per view. Reminder: your big villains are JBL and the Dudley Boyz. I think you know why this show is in trouble. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a video on James Dudley, who passed away at 94. Dudley was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in 1994 and is probably best known as being a guy who was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in 1994 and waving a towel during Bobo Brazil’s entrances.

We look back at last week with Heyman trying to fire up the Dudley Boyz, leading to them attacking Bearer.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Booker T. to open things up. He wants to make this clear: he had NOTHING to do with the abduction of Paul Bearer last week and nothing is going to stop him from taking care of the Undertaker tonight. He even has an idea who had Bearer attacked last week: the Undertaker! Booker thinks Undertaker had the Dudleys attack Bearer so he could have an excuse to skip out on the match with Booker tonight. He loads up the catchphrase but here’s John Cena to interrupt.

Cena isn’t happy with Booker almost costing him the US Title last week and they’re settling this right now. Apparently that was just business and Booker is just here to beat up Undertaker tonight. Booker doesn’t think much of Cena with the catchphrases and the hand signs because it’s clear that Cena is a Booker wannabe. Cena does his own impression of Booker, including the hand shaking (Cena: “Is it cold in here???”) and the weird face, which apparently has to do with Booker having an, ahem, accident.

This joke goes on WAY too long until Booker wants to be told that Cena didn’t say that. Kurt Angle comes out to say Cena has no respect and no class. It’s ok if he wants to insult Booker, but the main event is NOT being interrupted. Angle throws him out so Cena calls Luther Reigns lumpy. Booker jumps him from behind so the fight is on with Cena being thrown into Angle, who is still in the wheelchair. To make it even worse, Booker chairs Angle in the leg by mistake. Angle gets a mic and threatens to have Cena stripped of the title. Booker vs. Cena is only going to do Cena good at the moment, and maybe Booker will care.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Danny Basham

Non-title. Eddie grabs a headlock to start as the announcers try to tell us that Danny is one of the young, up and coming stars around here. A dropkick has Danny in trouble but he backdrops Eddie to the floor so Doug can get in a cheap shot. Ever the liar, Eddie fakes a chair shot from Doug and gets him ejected so it can be down to one on one. Danny is fine enough for a spinning belly to back for two and it’s off to a cravate.

Back up and some right hands to Eddie’s head just get on his nerves so he headscissors Danny down. The third Amigo is broken up and the ref gets bumped so Danny grabs the belt. That earns him a low blow and a belt shot to the head as Eddie lays down. Uh, since the referee didn’t see anything, why didn’t Eddie just hit the frog splash for the pin immediately? The splash hits and Danny is done a few seconds later.

Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t anything to see here but I do love seeing the top stars wrestle a match with someone that much lower than them. Danny got in a little offense here and it was a nice chance for him to showcase himself. Eddie wins a match that made him sweat a bit and Danny loses a match he had no business winning. Everything is fine.

Summerslam is coming to Toronto.

Here’s Mordecai for a prayer. He prays for the sinners and all of their families, who are no better than harlots who sell themselves on the city streets. The father has forgiven them but Mordecai will punish every one of them. Fire come out of the posts, which doesn’t go anywhere near as high as Kane’s. And we move on.

Miss Jackie shows off her other bikini (the one she didn’t show last week) to Rico and Charlie Haas. They’re impressed.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Classic vs. Funaki

Funaki is challenging and Chavo Jr. is on commentary to praise his dad. Some armdrags have the champ in trouble but a gutwrench suplex puts Funaki down. Chavo grabs the rope to avoid a dropkick but gets kicked in the head anyway. A shoulder to the ribs keeps Classic in trouble so Jr. shoves Funaki off the top to give his dad the pin. Same as last week and that’s fine.

Post match some women jump the barricade and mob Classic.

Post break Chavo Classic says he’s a sex symbol and that these women want some love from south of the border. Jr. leaves and Classic pays them off for their performances.

It’s time for the swimsuit contest with a bunch of beach themed stuff in the ring and Jamie Noble as host. We have Torrie Wilson, Miss Jackie, Dawn Marie and Sable, the latter of whom is making her big return. They all have twenty seconds to dance with one of the items and the fans get to pick the winner. Jamie tells Torrie to go first and she has to dance with the sandbox. She drops some sand over herself and Tazz almost loses his mind. Next up is Dawn with a beach chair, with Jamie having a seat.

Jamie rather approves of the half cousin of a lap dance and it’s Sable with a beach towel next. Sable wraps it around herself and reveals a one piece without doing much else. Finally we have Jackie with a bucket of water. She pours the water over herself and wins, though Torrie’s cheering sounded louder. Her reward is getting to kiss Jamie but he gets covered with water instead. Jamie is furious because his tuxedo is a rental. And yes, that’s the only payoff to the whole thing, though I’m shocked Rico didn’t come out in a thong or something.

We look at Heyman and the Dudleys from last week again.

Kenzo Suzuki is here next week.

Rene Dupree vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey goes after the knee to start and hammers away in the corner as Rene can’t keep up with him. A clothesline cuts Rey off and Rene drops a knee but the leg is hurting him. It’s hurting so badly that Mysterio is able to break up a superplex and hit a top rope seated senton. The 619 is broken up with the good knee to the ribs and there’s the French Tickler. Dupree’s powerbomb is loaded up but Rey reverses into a rollup for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. Well so much for Dupree, who goes from main eventing the show in a title match last week to losing clean in about three minutes here. That’s not the best idea in the world when this show is dying for heels. I know Dupree isn’t the best in the world, but he’s something fresh and the effort has already been put in. But then again, it’s not like the rest of the show has done anything logical lately anyway.

Raw Rebound.

We recap the opening segment.

Here’s JBL, carrying a bullrope, to pick the stipulation for the match with Eddie at the Great American Bash. It’s a Texas Bullrope match, and somehow this announcement takes nearly seven minutes because JBL is that slow and dull, along with saying the same things about Eddie that he’s said for a month and a half.

We see the Dudleys kidnapping Bearer for the third time tonight.

Undertaker vs. Booker T.

Booker is smart enough to jump Undertaker as he takes four days to remove his gear. Now why does no one else get that? Undertaker throws him into the corner and starts slugging away, followed by the running elbow drop for two. Old School is broken up (I’m not sure if it was the cranking on the arm or Undertaker going to the corner) but Undertaker kicks him in the face for two instead.

The armbarring continues with Undertaker lifting him up by the arm for the real cranking. Old School is broken up again and Cole actually gets the story correct by saying Undertaker might be off without Bearer. Back from a break with Booker hitting a missile dropkick for two and then kicking him in the face again. The chinlock goes on and the side kick takes Undertaker down for a delayed two.

Undertaker is able to reverse a suplex into one of his own and the comeback is on. Booker slips out of the Last Ride but can’t do the same on the chokeslam. It’s Tombstone time but cue Paul Heyman to say Undertaker needs to worry about what could be happening to Bearer. The match ends here in a no contest and Booker isn’t seen again for the rest of the show.

Rating: C. A little slow (as you probably guessed) but Booker got in some offense and the ending wasn’t definitive with Booker still having the chance to survive. That’s a good sign considering what appears to be an interesting feud with Cena. It’s nice to see Booker actually doing something worthwhile for once and the match was better than the pay per view version.

Undertaker grabs him by the throat, only to have the Dudleys pop up on screen. Bearer is in a room behind them and if Undertaker doesn’t want Bearer to suffer, he better listen to Heyman. Undertaker lets go and Heyman says Undertaker can either join himself and the Dudleys, or Bearer gets it. He has a week to decide.

Overall Rating: D+. That’s a big upgrade for this show as while not great, it was nowhere near as bad as some of their previous efforts. There’s still no way around JBL and the Dudleys as the top heels, but at least they featured some other people a lot more this week. While that’s good, this show did reinforce one of the biggest problems with Smackdown: Booker T. isn’t the featured heel. I’m not saying Booker is the be all and end all star or anything close to it, but he’s much better than JBL at the moment. Anyway I’ll cut myself off there and continue hoping that Undertaker vs. the Dudleys is at least short.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Lucha Underground – October 31, 2018 (Ultima Lucha Cuatro Part 1): Adios

IMG Credit: Lucha Underground

Lucha Underground
Date: October 31, 2018
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

We’ve finally reached Ultima Lucha Cuatro and there’s a pretty strong lineup for the final two shows of the year. Tonight we have the Trios Titles on the line and a mask vs. mask match, but the important thing around here is going to be the backstage stuff, which is where Ultima Lucha really wraps up a bunch of the big stories. That’s what really matters, though the wrestling should be fun too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video previews tonight’s three matches, as it should.

Aerostar goes to see Captain Vazquez (Catrina’s mother, a Los Angeles cop) and gives her the other half of the medallion, which is from the ancient Aztec times. Vazquez puts it together with her half and disappears, with Aerostar suggesting that she is now reunited with her family beyond the cosmos.

The announcers do their usual welcome.

Trios Titles: Rabbit Tribe vs. Reptile Tribe vs. XO Lishus/Sammy Guevara/Ivelisse

Elimination rules and the Reptile Tribe (Daga/Jeremiah Snake/Kobra Moon) are defending. The White Rabbit destroys everyone to start and loads up the white glove but a quintuple superkick takes him down. El Bunny, the small guy, starts speeding things up with a very spinny headscissors to send Daga outside, setting up dives from Sammy and Ivelisse.

Sammy takes Kobra up above the entrance and hits a crazy Spanish Fly onto everyone else. That ticks the White Rabbit off so he starts wrecking everyone in sight, leaving Sammy to rollup Bunny for the elimination. The White Rabbit isn’t about to leave peacefully so he Mandible Claws Sammy, drawing blood from the mouth. We need a medic as we take a break.

Back with Ivelisse and XO slugging away at all three champs with Ivelisse getting two off the crucifix driver. XO hits a wheelbarrow Stunner for two on Sami with Moon and Daga making a save. Sami is back up and pulls XO shoulder first into the rope, damaging XO’s neck/shoulder/collar bone in the process.

Ivelisse hits a high crossbody onto Daga and Moon with Sami making a save this time. Code Red gets two more on Sami but Daga kicks Ivelisse away, leaving the injured XO all alone. XO goes after them all and gets triple superkicked. The double underhook shoulder breaker into a hurricanrana driver sets up a cross armbreaker for the tap at 12:04.

Rating: C. The action was good though I’m a little surprised by the result as you would have assumed the Rabbits hopped away with the titles here. The Trios Titles haven’t exactly been much in a long time but at least they’re getting some actual teams together at the moment. Now just keep that going, assuming the show is around next season.

Taya Mundo vs. Ricky Mundo

Ricky broke up Taya’s wedding and it’s time for pain. Taya throws him down to start and hits an early release German suplex as the beating is on in a hurry. The running knees in the corner give Taya two but Ricky is right back with a superkick. It’s table time but Taya jumps onto the announcers’ table for a crossbody. Back in and a Saito suplex gives Taya two, followed by a curb stomp. Ricky is almost done anyway so Taya puts on a modified STF to make him tap at 4:11.

Rating: D+. Almost a squash here but the angle and story wrapping up was much more important than the wrestling. Ricky is just a goof so having Taya beat him up is hardly a stretch. Taya is a skilled wrestler, meaning this is hardly a fluke win. Not a bad match or anything, but the wrestling wasn’t the point.

Post match Taya tells him that he ruined her f****** (not censored) wedding and chokeslams him off the apron through the table.

Son of Havoc vs. Killshot

Mask vs. mask. They slug it out to start as Vampiro explains lucha de apuestas (it means a bet match, so his long explanation isn’t quite needed. Killshot takes him to the floor for some chops against the wall and a spinning double underhook slam drops Havoc back inside. Havoc cartwheels away but gets caught with a knee to the face, followed by the Killstomp for two.

Hang on though as Killshot needs a stretcher and unhooks the bottom turnbuckle to get it inside. That’s enough in the ring so let’s head outside again with another table being set up. Havoc fights off of it without much effort and dives off the balcony with a splash to put Killshot through it instead. That only gives Havoc two back inside but Killshot crotches him to break up the shooting star.

Killshot heads up as well but gets taken down with a super Death Valley Driver, setting up the shooting star for two in a great near fall. Havoc goes up again and a superplex brings him down onto the stretcher, setting up the Killstomp for a close two. They slug it out on the stretcher until Havoc gives him a piledriver. That’s not enough for the cover though as Havoc straps him to the stretcher and hits another shooting star for the pin at 14:10.

Rating: B. Killshot is one of the most underrated and consistent people around here and that makes him a very valuable member of the roster. I can’t say I’m surprised as some of his stuff outside of Lucha Underground has been excellent as well. This was another hard hitting match and while it wasn’t quite last year’s match with Dante Fox, it was a heck of a brawl with the right ending.

Post break, Killshot says his name is Jermaine Strickland and he left his brothers to die in war. The mask comes off and it’s someone you probably know better as Shane Strickland. Havoc holds up the mask as Killshot leaves to a lot of cheering.

After the credits, Strickland comes up to Dante Fox (in military uniform), who says he was on a mission. Strickland requests to be relieved of duty and walks away.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t a blow away great show, but to be fair this is just the warm up for next week’s big stuff anyway. It’s nice to have closure to a few stories and that’s what we got here in a well wrapped up way. The main event is pretty good and while it seems that Killshot is gone, almost any Strickland match is worth seeing. Hopefully he gets to make it big soon, because he certainly has the talent. Hopefully next week is the huge show it should be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2003: The Last Ride

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2003
Date: November 16, 2003
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 13,487
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

This is another big one and it’s also a one sided show. The Smackdown offerings are about as uninteresting as they could be while the Raw side looks at at least marginally better. This isn’t a great show on paper and I have a bad feeling that it’s going to be even worse as it actually takes place. Let’s get to it.

Here’s the go home episode of Smackdown if you need a recap.

The opening video talks about surviving things such as the game, evolution, and the battles in between. That’s all this needed to be, especially with Austin vs. Bischoff being the real main event.

Team Angle vs. Team Lesnar

Kurt Angle, Hardcore Holly, Chris Benoit, John Cena, Bradshaw

Brock Lesnar, Big Show, A-Train, Nathan Jones, Matt Morgan

Cena is out first and raps about burying everyone, meaning Lesnar and Show need a bigger graves. He’s still new at this team thing because he wonders if he can trade his partners in for a one night stand with Sable. Holly wastes no time and attacks Lesnar before the bell, sending him into the steps and trying a full nelson to break his neck. He also shoves a referee, and gets disqualified before the match even starts.

The bell rings and a Clothesline from Bradshaw ends A-Train in less than thirty seconds to tie it up. The chokeslam gets rid of Bradshaw as we’re not even a minute in yet. Good idea actually, as it’s not like Bradshaw and Holly were anything more than warm bodies anyway. Cena comes in but can’t FU Big Show and gets thrown into the corner as the four remaining members start working him over. A Throwback to Lesnar gets two but more importantly it allows the hot tag off to Benoit.

The chokeslam is countered into a Crossface (always looks cool) with Lesnar making a save. It’s off to an abdominal stretch as things slow down again. The standing legdrop gets two on Benoit and it’s time for some double teaming on the floor. Angle and Cena have finally had enough and go over to make a save but Benoit is beaten down even more. Morgan comes in for some lumbering offense but a suplex allows the hot tag to Angle. That means a series of suplexes as everything breaks down. The Angle Slam eliminates Morgan to tie us up at three.

Show clotheslines Jones by mistake though and an ankle lock gets rid of Nathan less than thirty seconds later. An F5 gets rid of Angle with the first count coming as Jones’ elimination is still being announced. We’re down to Benoit/Cena vs. Lesnar/Show and Brock goes shoulder first into the post.

A Crossface has Lesnar in trouble but he reverses into a cradle for two. Benoit won’t be denied though and slaps it on again, this time with Lesnar’s feet reaching the ropes. The third attempt makes Lesnar tap and we’re down to two on one. Benoit drops Show with a top rope shoulder for two so Cena adds a chain shot and the FU for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was too fast for the most part but the real problem comes from the fact that so many people were involved in the first place. This really could have been a six man elimination tag (A-Train as the third villain) and it would have been better, but that’s not how these things traditionally work. Cena and Benoit winning in the end is the right way to go as Cena’s rocket push is being assembled, but at the same time there’s a lot of work left to do. Benoit vs. Cena, which could still happen, would be a benefit for both guys and that’s a good sign for the future. Unfortunately it wasn’t the best present, but at least it wasn’t long.

Vince McMahon comes in to see Shane and talks about how tonight, father and son are facing two brothers. He thinks it’s almost spiritual and asks Shane how he feels about that. Shane only feels sorry for Vince. The boss leaves and runs into Austin, who starts laughing. Then he stops and gets serious before walking away. These two have great chemistry even if it doesn’t make the most sense.

JR explains the exchange.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Molly Holly

Lita is challenging after winning a #1 contenders match a few weeks back. Feeling out process to start as JR explains that these two have some contrasting styles. Lita gets knocked to the floor so Molly starts in on the back with some ax handles. We hit a dragon sleeper with Jerry liking her intensity. The handspring elbow in the corner keeps Lita in trouble and Molly stomps away.

A running corner clothesline rocks Molly and Lita rains down some right hands for her first real offense. Molly cuts her off with a side slam but Lawler would rather talk about Lita’s thong. A powerbomb out of the corner gives Lita a breather but the moonsault misses. The Molly Go Round gets two so Molly rips off a turnbuckle pad and sends Lita face first to retain.

Rating: D+. This was mainly Molly doing everything while Lita did a thing or two here and there. That’s not the most thrilling style in the world but Molly can be made into a good champion for a big name to take the title from later. Let her be built up for awhile instead of giving Lita the title immediately. It’s ok to wait now and then.

We recap Kane vs. Shane McMahon. Kane went nuts after losing his mask and after struggling to defeat Rob Van Dam, started tormenting Linda McMahon. Shane became the big star out of this because of course he did, including beating himself in a Last Man Standing match. Various attempted murders later set up this ambulance match, which is possibly the second most pushed match on the show.

Shane McMahon vs. Kane

Ambulance match with Shane charging straight at him for a crossbody to the floor. Shane knocks him onto the announcers’ table and hits him in the head with a monitor, setting up the big elbow to drive Kane through. That’s enough at ringside though so they head to the back, including the camera cutting out. That means we hit the pretape and come back with Shane pounding him down with a kendo stick.

Shane puts him in a security shack and jumps into an SUV to run Kane over again. Finding a well placed walkie-talkie, Shane tells someone to SEND IT, which means it’s time for an ambulance backstage. But is that the designated ambulance? That makes a difference you know. Instead of backing the ambulance up to the shack where Kane is down, Shane grabs a stretcher and wheels it twenty feet over, allowing Kane to grab him by the throat and slam Shane into a wall.

The camera goes out again and we pick it up with Kane knocking him back into the arena. Shane gets knocked into the front of the ambulance but manages to hit Kane in the face with the back door. What a sick sounding thud too. Kane is back up and sends Shane into the ambulance but another ram with the door gets Shane out of trouble. A tornado DDT on the floor plants Kane as they’re now near the grave for the Buried Alive match.

Shane puts a trashcan (good thing one was nearby) and a crashpad (same as before) and hits the Coast to Coast off the top of the ambulance to smash Kane’s face. That’s still not enough to wrap things up as Kane pulls Shane into the ambulance with him for more brawling. It’s Kane throwing Shane out though and then ramming him back first into the side. He javelins Shane’s head into the other side (you have to match you see) and a Tombstone on the floor is enough for the win.

Rating: D. This wasn’t as long as I was expecting but again, this doesn’t really do what they were likely shooting for with Kane. It makes two straight matches where Kane has had trouble beating up Shane McMahon. He can destroy Rob Van Dam but Shane gives him trouble? It didn’t work last time and it doesn’t work here. Now that he’s lost all of his heat though, you can pencil him in for a World Title match.

Brock Lesnar says he didn’t lose that match because his team lost it instead. Goldberg comes in for a staredown but Lesnar won’t wish him luck tonight. And so it begins.

Here’s the Coach, in a neck brace, for a chat. He assures his fans that he’s fine after the 3D from the Dudleys on Monday and he’ll be good to go soon. That seems to be it but hang on a second as Coach sees Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban in the front row. Cuban is ready to see Austin’s team win and insults referees of all kinds (he’s known for heavy criticisms of NBA referees). This brings out Eric Bischoff to invite Cuban into the ring, where a fight breaks out. Bischoff gets shoved down but here’s Randy Orton for an RKO to complete this waste of time.

Evolution is having a party with HHH in the middle of a good looking bunch of women. Ric Flair comes in to say they can have the champ later, which annoys HHH. Orton comes in, hits on the women, and brags about what he just did. Uh, congratulations?

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Basham Brothers

The Brothers are defending after Eddie won a handicap match to earn the shot. Eddie and Chavo waste no time in slugging away until Shaniqua offers a distraction to slow things down. That doesn’t seem to matter much to the cousins as Eddie works over Danny to start things off. A dropkick gives Chavo two and there’s a headscissors/armdrag combination from Eddie to put both champs down.

Some double teaming (described by Cole as “classic Bashams”) takes over though and Shaniqua gets in a slam on Eddie for good measure. Back in and Eddie gets stomped in the corner, followed by a double vertical suplex for two. Eddie gets free with a headscissors and hands it back to Chavo, who is double flapjacked in short order. Chavo fights up but Twin Magic takes him down again. Everything breaks down and Chavo slams Shaniqua, followed by a quick spanking. That’s NOT cool with the champs so Doug grabs a rollup with Chavo’s tights to retain.

Rating: D+. Another TV level match here with Los Guerreros coming up short again as we get closer to their inevitable split. The Bashams aren’t a great team (though they have apparently have a classic period) but they’re serviceable for something like this. Get rid of the dominatrix stuff though as it’s not working, isn’t funny and makes Shaniqua look like the important part of the team, which misses the point entirely.

Replays show Chavo kicking Eddie down by mistake, meaning this is far from over.

JR doesn’t think Austin can handle this trusting people stuff and has never seen Austin this angry.

We recap Team Austin vs. Team Bischoff. They’re running the show together but Austin isn’t allowed to attack people at will anymore. On top of that, a lot of people are accusing him of ruining the show through his various antics. That doesn’t sit well with Austin, so it’s time for a winner take all match with the winner getting to run Raw on their own. The idea is Austin has to trust people, which goes against everything he believes in.

Team Austin vs. Team Bischoff

Austin: Shawn Michaels, Dudley Boyz, Booker T., Rob Van Dam

Bischoff: Scott Steiner, Mark Henry, Christian, Chris Jericho, Randy Orton

Coach, Stacy Keibler and the two team captains are at ringside. The fans want tables to start but have to settle with D-Von and Christian instead. D-Von shoulders him down to start but gets slapped in the face, triggering a bunch of right hands to the head. That’s not a nice response. Van Dam comes in for some forearms to the face and a kick to the jaw gets the same. It’s off to Jericho for some more luck, followed by Steiner whipping Van Dam hard into the corner to set up some posing.

Van Dam’s comeback is cut off by a belly to belly superplex but he’s able to get over to Booker for the hot tag. Things speed way up in a hurry and the scissors kick into the Spinarooni makes Bischoff face palm. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Steiner hits Booker low. The Recliner goes on but Stacy offers a distraction, setting up a reverse 3D. A Bookend is enough to get rid of Steiner and make it 5-4.

The World’s Strongest Slam gets rid of Booker a few seconds later to tie it right back up. Bubba comes in to try his luck and is sent hard into the corner. D-Von’s help doesn’t make things much better as the Dudleys are rammed together. Mark misses a charge though and it’s a 3D into the Five Star for the elimination. It’s off to Orton for a hard clothesline on Van Dam but Rob scores with a kick. Another Five Star is loaded up but Jericho makes a save, setting up the RKO to tie things up at three each. Jericho comes in and missile dropkicks D-Von down as JR and King wonder how things will go tomorrow night.

D-Von shoulders Jericho down for no count as Christian has the referee, setting up the sleeper drop for another elimination. This match is already better paced than the opener and here’s Shawn to pick things up all over again. Shawn pounds on Jericho in the corner and catches an invading Christian without much effort. Orton gets in a dropkick but stays down anyway as I guess he didn’t hit all of it. A double tag brings in Christian and Bubba with a backdrop getting two on the Canadian.

Jericho runs Christian over by mistake but a low blow sets up the Unprettier to get rid of Bubba. We’re down to Shawn vs. Christian/Jericho/Orton and Austin is starting to see how much trouble he’s in. Shawn punches away at Christian to start but some good old fashioned double teaming has Shawn in trouble again. Like there’s any other way this should go. Shawn is taken outside and catapulted into the post (you can see him blade on the wide shot) to bust open a GUSHER.

That and a suplex are only good for two back inside and Christian even steals his pose. Jerry: “That was a creepy little pose right there.” The Unprettier is broken up and a quick Sweet Chin Music gets rid of Christian. A frustrated Jericho comes in and gets two off a clothesline before handing it back to Orton. Shawn gets in a belly to back suplex but Jericho comes back in to take over again. As usual, JR is perfect at calling this kind of a story and Shawn getting two off a DDT has Jerry trying as hard as he can to believe in Shawn.

The Lionsault hits knees and Shawn pulls himself up but gets pulled into a Walls attempt. That’s reversed into a quick small package to get rid of Jericho and make it one on one (Lawler: “I BELIEVE I BELIEVE!”). Jericho isn’t gone yet though and caves Shawn’s head in with a chair shot. Why that isn’t a DQ on Orton isn’t clear but Shawn is done as Orton comes back in.

That’s only good for two and you can see the sigh of relief from Austin. Orton’s high crossbody hits the referee and here’s Bischoff to break up Sweet Chin Music. That’s too much for Austin so it’s a Stunner to Orton but he makes the mistake of beating on Bischoff a bit too much. They go up the aisle and here’s Batista to powerbomb Shawn, giving Orton the final pin.

Rating: B+. I love this match and always have. It doesn’t really pick up until Shawn is on his own but that’s what he’s done best throughout his entire career. He knows how to play the underdog better than anyone I’ve ever seen and you really can get behind the Lawler mindset of trying to believe here. As usual, Shawn is great in this role and it’s never too far to believe that he could pull this off (quick superkick, small package for two eliminations). Great stuff, but you might want to skip the first few minutes.

Austin is stunned at the loss because he placed his career in someone else’s hands and was let down. The bloody Shawn can barely stand and Austin congratulates him for giving it everything he had. Austin grabs the mic and talks about starting here in Dallas and going out here as well. Coach comes out to laugh and gets beaten up one more time with security getting the same treatment. Beer is consumed as a final goodbye. You know, assuming you believe that he’s gone for good this time.

We recap Undertaker vs. Vince McMahon. Undertaker wants the title one more time but Vince screwed him over at No Mercy. Therefore Undertaker wanted a Buried Alive match here, because that’s where you go from here. Vince then went into this weird spiritual thing, which really didn’t work or accomplish much.

Tazz’s key for Vince’s victory: AVOID THE HOLE! Good advice.

Vince McMahon vs. Undertaker

Buried Alive and Vince drops to a knee in prayer before the match. Undertaker punches him down to start and the beating is on in a hurry. Vince is already bleeding less than thirty seconds in as this is going to be one sided for a long time. The beating continues until Undertaker crotches him on the post to switch things up a bit. More low blows keep Vince in trouble and it’s time to go to the floor with Undertaker choking with a cord. Completely one sided so far, as you probably guessed.

Cole and Tazz try to explain the idea of Vince being punished for his sins, which I’m guessing are mainly about Stephanie. I mean, almost everything else is. Vince is thrown over the announcers’ table and it’s time to go to the grave. Well just Undertaker at this point and he comes back with a shovel. One heck of a shot to the head rocks Vince again and Cole declares it over. So much for Undertaker’s hot streak.

Vince’s ankle gets crushed by the steps and NOW it’s time to head to the grave. Vince finally throws some dirt in the eyes (his first “offense”) and a low blow keeps Undertaker in trouble. A shovel to the head puts Undertaker in the grave….for a few seconds. He pulls Vince in and goes to the front loader to drop the dirt but gets cut off by lightning. Cue Kane to beat up Undertaker and bury him (again) to give Vince the win.

Rating: D-. So yeah LOLVINCEWINS because of course he does. There was nothing to see here unless you like Undertaker destroying people and then having a surprise ending. The announcers treated this like Undertaker’s last match, because if there’s one thing Undertaker is known for, it’s going away for good. It’s more of a match than an angle, and there’s no way that’s how Undertaker is going out. Bad match but moderately entertaining beatdown.

Cole and Tazz are SHOCKED.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Goldberg won the title last month so HHH put a $100,000 bounty on his head. Batista returned and collected by breaking Goldberg’s ankle so tonight it’s about revenge and the title. There’s not much of a reason for this to main event but would you expect much else? Well save for Vince maybe?

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Goldberg

Goldberg is defending and is coming in with a bad ankle. HHH is looking as out of shape as I’ve seen him in years, probably due to his bad groin injury. Hang on a second though as Goldberg has to quickly dispatch Flair to make it a little more fair. They head outside in short order with Goldberg hammering away but the ankle gives out on a gorilla press attempt.

A chop block takes Goldberg down and we hit the meat of the match. Flair is back up as HHH sends Goldberg outside, meaning a distraction sets up a chair to Goldberg’s ankle. There’s another chop block back inside and the slow leg work continues with Flair getting in a few shots of his own. A knee drop keeps the ankle in trouble and we hit a half crab. At least he knows his low level submissions.

Goldberg grabs the rope and fires off some right hands to little avail. A limping clothesline works a bit better as Flair is beside himself. HHH takes him down again and calls for a Figure Four, only to be kicked into the referee. That means brass knuckles for a very near fall and HHH beats up the referee again. The sledgehammer is brought down but Goldberg kicks him down with the bad ankle.

Flair’s latest attempt at interfering gets him slammed off the top (JR: “It hasn’t worked in thirty years.”) and Goldberg grabs the hammer. A shot to the ribs drops Flair and an invading Batista and Orton are quickly dispatched as well. The Pedigree is blocked and Goldberg picks up the hammer again but throws it down. Instead it’s a spear and Jackhammer to retain the title like a real man.

Rating: D+. Well if you’re a fan of HHH working the ankle, have fun. Goldberg looks strong, but there have been so many other big matches tonight that this isn’t the strongest way to end things. I’ll give them points for giving Goldberg a push, but you’re crazy if you think HHH isn’t getting the title back within the next month. Just a messy brawl, but it could have been much worse. At least HHH didn’t need fifteen minutes of working the leg.

Overall Rating: C-. There’s some good and bad stuff on this show but the bad wins out in the end. Between the weak main event, not great opener and pretty terrible Vince vs. Undertaker match, there’s not enough to put with Shawn’s amazing performance. This was better than I was expecting though and that’s a nice relief. Both shows need something fresh on top and it actually seems to be happening on Smackdown. I’ll take one out of two, especially at this point in time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2002: I Still Don’t Like It

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2002
Date: November 17, 2002
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 17,930
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

For those of you who have read my old reviews of this show, you might remember that the main event has sent me into various rantings and ravings over the years. It might have ticked me off more than any match ever at one point, though it’s since been topped multiple times. I’m kind of curious to see how I react to it this time around so let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on Big Show vs. Lesnar, which is built around the idea that Lesnar is banged up and can’t throw Big Show around like he can with everyone else. The Elimination Chamber actually takes second billing here.

Dudley Boyz/Jeff Hardy vs. Rico/3 Minute Warning

Elimination tables match and that would still be Bubba and Spike. The villains are quickly sent outside with Spike being thrown at the Samoans. He’s easily caught and 3 Minute Warning is nice enough to stand there while Bubba drops down for Poetry in Motion from Jeff. Back in and Jamal takes a hurricanrana out of the corner, followed by Jeff playing D-Von in What’s Up.

The first table is set up in the corner and Jeff is backdropped over the top for one heck of a crash. Rosey drives himself through a table (not an elimination) but stands up, allowing Jeff to hit a high crossbody….which just bounces off the big man. The Dudley Dog is countered and Spike is tossed through a table for the first elimination. Bubba and Jeff fight back but can’t get around the monsters.

Rosey takes Jeff outside and loads up a table but Bubba makes the save. A few forearms to the back allow Jeff to climb onto an exit tunnel for the Swanton to get rid of Rosey. Back in and Rico loads Bubba onto a table before setting up a moonsault. In a fairly infamous moment, there’s no Jeff to make the save so Rico stands there for about ten seconds and even Bubba can be seen looking around for Jeff. Rico very clearly shouts “COME ON JEFF” before Hardy crotches him for the save.

Jamal moves the table so Rico only has to take a regular belly to back superplex. That’s so much better you see. Jeff takes Jamal to the floor and tries to run the barricade (as in he climbs onto it and then runs instead of a running jump and then running across) but falls anyway, sending himself head first through a table. That would be twice in a week that he’s blown that spot and for some reason I don’t picture him being punished anytime soon. Thankfully Jamal hits one heck of a top rope splash to put Jeff through a table to get us down to 2-1.

Ever the genius, Jamal tries a hurricanrana with a table right behind him. After the most obvious powerbomb this side of an Undertaker match, we’re down to Bubba vs. Rico. 3 Minute Warning comes back in to beat on Bubba but D-Von comes out to FINALLY reunite with his brother to one heck of a reaction. A quick 3D puts Rico through a table for the win.

Rating: C+. They really didn’t have another option here as the Dudleys belong together. It would take about twelve years before Bubba was able to strike out on his own and even that only kind of worked. The tag division is dying for some better talent and while not the freshest thing in the world, the Dudleys are certainly better than most other options.

The rest of the match was entertaining but my goodness Jeff was embarrassing out there. He can barely do any of his signature stuff without messing something up anymore and yet he’s still out there every single week doing the same spots over and over. Get him some help already before this becomes an even bigger problem than it already is.

Stacy Keibler introduces Saliva to perform Always live at the World. At least we get some highlights for the show as a bonus.

Cruiserweight Title: Billy Kidman vs. Jamie Noble

Kidman is challenging after defeating Noble twice in the last two weeks. Noble tries a rollup for the fast pin before stomping Kidman down to really take over. A neckbreaker sets up a bow and arrow as Nidia is her usual VERY excited self. Jamie dives into a dropkick as the announcers talk about the tables match. A Hoshi Geroshi (or however you spell the fireman’s carry into a backbreaker) gets two on the champ, followed by a good looking placha to the floor.

Back in and Noble reverses a backslide into the tiger bomb for two but makes the mistake of putting Kidman on the top. A good looking super DDT plants Noble but since DDTs mean nothing, Jamie is right back up for a hanging DDT off the top for his own near fall. An enziguri drops Noble again and, after a failed Nidia distraction, the shooting star gives us a new champion.

Rating: C+. Some selling issues aside, this was a good, back and forth match with both guys looking strong. The problem is the division has fallen into the same pattern it always has: the champion and one challenger comprise the entire thing and that doesn’t exactly have staying power. The match was good though and Kidman winning the title is fine.

Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit get into it again but Angle insists that they’re amigos. Another long form hug ensues.

Victoria is getting ready but apparently her mirror thinks Trish Stratus is prettier.

We recap Victoria vs. Trish. Victoria claims that Trish slept her way into a job after WWE wanted to sign both of them. Now Victoria is here to get revenge on her former friend. The music sounds like the shower scene from Psycho for a nice touch.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Trish is defending and this is a hardcore match. Victoria wastes no time and puller her down by the coat before grabbing a broom. JR asks if she’s going to fly it and suggests Victoria is un-Divaesque. That’s probably an unintentional compliment. A trashcan lid gets knocked into the champ’s face and Victoria sends her into the steps. Victoria sets up a trashcan in the corner (with the hole facing the ring), only to have Trish catapult her hands first into said can (that looked horrible and no camera edit was going to save it).

A kick to the head gives Trish two and one heck of a trashcan lid shot knocks Victoria (and her bloody nose) to the floor. The Chick Kick gets two and a HORRIBLE bulldog out of the corner (Victoria’s head hit Trish’s ribs) is good for the same. Victoria blinds her with a fire extinguisher though and a snap suplex of all things gives us a new champion.

Rating: B-. Botches aside, this is a situation where the energy carries the match. They were beating the heck out of each other and you could feel the intensity. The botches and the ending really hold it down but it’s still one of the best women’s matches you’ll see around this time. I know there are still some major issues with the women of this era but this was miles ahead of most things you would see from them at this time.

Eric Bischoff is bragging about the Chamber when Big Show comes up. He’s going to prove Eric wrong for trading him.

Paul Heyman is nervous but says Brock needs to put it all behind him. Tonight they’re in MSG and Heyman is going to do whatever it takes to make sure his client leaves as champion.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and the fans are entirely behind him. Brock gets right in his face but gets tossed into the corner. That earns show a double leg takedown and there’s a belly to back suplex on Show. A German suplex follows and Heyman looks nervous. The ref gets bumped but Lesnar belly to bellies Show anyway. Heyman slides in a chair and Brock cracks Show in the head with it, setting up the F5. Another referee comes down but Heyman pulls him out at two. Reality sets in as the chase is on but Show chairs Lesnar in the bad ribs. A chokeslam onto the chair gives Lesnar his first pinfall loss.

Rating: C-. They did everything they could here and thankfully it was really short. Aside from the obvious, I still have a major problem with the story: why did Heyman go through with the screwjob? Lesnar proved him wrong by suplexing and F5ing Big Show but Heyman turned on him anyway. Wouldn’t it make more sense to stick with the more dominant force when you still have Lesnar to protect you? I’d assume it’s because of Heyman and Lesnar’s issues but Heyman has been able to talk Lesnar down before. It’s far from the worst stretch ever but I’m still not sure it makes the most sense.

Heyman and Show run to the parking lot and drive away.

We recap the Smackdown Tag Team Title match. All three teams have traded the titles for over a month now with one classic match after another. The only possible option was a triple threat match and Stephanie McMahon has made it an elimination match for even more fun. This is the real Smackdown main event and they’ve certainly earned that honor with everything they’ve done so far.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle vs. Los Guerreros vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

Edge and Mysterio are defending and Angle/Benoit still can’t get along. Benoit and Mysterio start things off with Chris going head first into the buckle. Edge, in some shiny tights, comes in to drop Angle with a forearm. It’s back to Rey for a springboard splash on Chavo as they’re tagging very quickly here. Eddie comes in to a very noticeable pop and keeps Rey in trouble with some forearms to the back.

The fast tags continue as Angle comes in and goes shoulder first into the post. He’s still able to knock Rey off the top though and the champs stay in trouble. Benoit stays on Mysterio with some rapid fire suplexes as Los Guerreros are (wisely) content with staying on the floor. The Angle Slam doesn’t work so Kurt clotheslines Rey’s head off for two instead. We hit a long front facelock until Rey fights up for a spinwheel kick to the jaw. That’s enough for the hot tag to Edge as everything breaks down.

Rey hurricanranas Eddie to the floor, leaving Edge to get caught in an ankle lock/Crossface combination. Somehow he doesn’t tap out immediately so it’s Rey making the save, followed by a running corkscrew dive onto Chavo and Angle. Benoit grabs the German suplex on Edge, only to have Eddie come in off the top with a sunset flip to send both guys flying. Everyone gets up so Benoit sends Eddie outside, followed by the rolling German suplexes on Edge. Those things always look great.

Eddie gives Edge the frog splash but Benoit breaks it up with a Swan Dive for no apparent reason. Angle comes back in with the ankle lock on Eddie while Benoit Crossfaces Edge, only to have Chavo save Edge with the title. Kurt picks up the title so Benoit thinks it was him, leaving Edge to spear Benoit for the first elimination. That leaves us with two but Benoit and Angle wreck everyone before heading to the back. What poor sportsmanship.

We settle down to Eddie grabbing a sleeper on Edge, followed by a front facelock in case that’s too intense for you. Edge flapjacks both Guerreros and brings Rey back in as this isn’t exactly the break neck pace you would expect. Everything breaks down again and the pop up hurricanrana gets two on Eddie. That would look to set up the West Coast Pop but Chavo gets in a belt shot, knocking Rey into the Lasso From El Paso for the submission and the titles.

Rating: B. This wasn’t as good as I remember but I think that’s because I just recently watched all the TV matches, which were almost all better. This had too much to live up to and there’s only so much you can do when you’re asked to go out and have a masterpiece. The belt shots didn’t do much to help either as they’re hardly anything interesting and you expect more from these guys.

It’s still a good match and the best thing on the show by far though and it deserves a bit more than just criticism. Some of the sequences were excellent and showed some creativity, along with Benoit and Angle suplexing everything in sight. If this was one of the matches that took place on TV, it would be considered a classic. Some more time would have helped as well.

Here’s Christopher Nowinski to say he’s smarter than the rest of the crowd. After some lame New York Yankees jokes, Matt Hardy (who keeps the temperature at a toasty 75 degrees and only drinks low fat chocolate milk) comes out to say this place is sucking the Mattitude out of him. The payoff is Scott Steiner, who shows up and destroys both guys because we haven’t seen Matt get beaten up recently.

Shawn Michaels is ready to talk about why he believes he can win but RNN BREAKING NEWS tells us that Randy came here to watch. Luckily a sexy flight attendant gave him an extra pillow so there was no further damage to his shoulder.

Long video on the Elimination Chamber which doesn’t really tell us anything. Granted that’s because there isn’t a story here. Basically Bischoff wanted to top Stephanie’s pay per view and invented the Chamber. They’ve made no secret of the fact that this is ALL about HHH vs. Shawn Michaels.

HHH says he’s gone through everyone so he’ll go through everyone tonight too.

Bischoff comes out to walk through the Chamber and explain the rules. This time really couldn’t have gone to the Tag Team Title match? Just put it on a graphic or something…..which they do while Bischoff is still talking.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T. vs. Kane vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Rob Van Dam

HHH is defending. Saliva, at the World, plays Jericho’s music for a cool bit. As the entrances go on forever, it occurs to me how much Shawn’s hair looks like AJ Styles’ soccer mom look. HHH and Van Dam start things off with Rob going straight to the kicks. A backdrop puts HHH onto the steel floor and he hits the cage wall three times in a row. The champ is busted open and Van Dam monkey flips him onto the cage again.

Rolling Thunder over the top makes things even worse as it’s all Van Dam so far. Rob climbs up on top of Jericho’s chamber and gets his legs pulled down into it. Somehow that’s still not enough for HHH to do anything as Rob flips down onto HHH. See? He’s giving Van Dam a rub right now!

Jericho is in third but gets kicked down almost immediately as Rob stays on a roll. In your first ever Chamber highlight reel moment, Jericho catapults Van Dam at the cage wall and Rob just hangs onto it instead of crashing. HHH gets back up and knees Van Dam in the head, meaning it’s time for the double teaming to begin. Rob kicks them both down again and it’s Booker T in fourth to even things up, despite Van Dam doing just fine on his own.

Jericho and HHH are sent to the floor so we can get a Spinarooni, followed by a slugout with Van Dam. The good guys clean house again and it’s HHH getting knocked down, allowing Rob to climb an individual chamber. That means a Five Star, with his knee going right into HHH’s throat which put him out of action for a few weeks. Van Dam seems to have hurt his knee as well, allowing Booker to eliminate him with a missile dropkick. HHH can barely move so here’s Kane to get us back to four.

Jericho is launched through the bulletproof (yes bulletproof) glass to draw some more blood. Chris is fine enough to hit Booker low, followed by a chokeslam and the Lionsault to get rid of Booker. Now that the two guys who have been more over than the entire roster for the last three months are gone, let’s get on with the REAL entertainment.

Jericho and Kane slowly fight until HHH is slammed off the top. Shawn, looking like he’s wrestled one match in four and a half years and in hideous brown tights for some reason, comes in and gets to clean house for a bit. Kane chokeslams everyone but eats a superkick, Pedigree and Lionsault to get us down to three. Jericho and HHH team up on Shawn with HHH rubbing his head against the steel to bust Shawn open. A ram into the wall gives Shawn an opening and he forearms HHH, only to get bulldogged down.

The Lionsault gets two and Jericho is so frustrated that he gets caught in the Walls. HHH makes the save with a DDT but gets in a fight with Jericho over who can pin Shawn. Jericho grabs the Walls on HHH but gets superkicked for the elimination. As anyone paying attention expected, we’re down to HHH vs. Shawn with a spinebuster going straight for the bad back.

Shawn gets thrown through the glass as we really crank up the emotions. The slow beating continues with Shawn being thrown outside again, only to catapult HHH into the wall. Shawn’s top rope elbow gets no cover and HHH grabs the Pedigree for a delayed two. Another Pedigree attempt is countered and Sweet Chin Music gives Shawn the pin and the title.

Rating: B. I’m still not sure what to think of this match. Above all else, it’s long, far longer than it needed to be. The Chamber itself did help and was interesting to see but they need to tweak things a bit (lower the time to four minutes or so). It’s still good but there’s the other problem that it’s kind of hard to overcome: the whole thing felt like a big waste of time until we got to the ending.

That ending of course is Shawn vs. HHH and they might as well have just put up a big clock counting down until we got there. No one else mattered in this match and WWE did nothing to hide it. That makes for an ending similar to Wrestlemania XXXII with Roman Reigns vs. HHH: there’s no drama and it makes for a boring match because you’re just waiting to get to the part that matters.

While I still have issues about guys like Booker, Kane, Van Dam and Jericho being treated as second class citizens so HHH and Shawn can do it one more time (as in the second one more time), it’s not as bad as it once was. After watching the TV shows building up to this, it’s not like this was exactly shocking and the four of them were hardly made to look like real threats to take the title. That doesn’t make it any better but it does make things a bit easier to take.

Overall Rating: C+. This show is pretty much all over the place with good action (there really isn’t a bad match on the card) but sweet goodness some of the choices make your head spin. We really are watching a show in 2002 where Big Show and Shawn Michaels walked out with the World Titles. On top of that we had a less than mind blowing Tag Team Title match which was probably the highlight.

The big problem is that aside from the Chamber itself debuting, there really isn’t anything on here that feels big. Big Show winning was more groan inducing than anything else and Shawn winning felt like we were seeing the inevitable, though the celebration felt big. There’s nothing on here that’s going to really stick with you and that’s not good as the show is worth seeing for the action alone. Overall it’s good but really not remarkable, which is kind of an odd way to compliment a show.

 

Ratings Comparison

Dudley Boyz/Jeff Hardy vs. Rico/3 Minute Warning

Original: B

2012 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: C+

Billy Kidman vs. Jamie Noble

Original: C+

2012 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: C+

Victoria vs. Trish Stratus

Original: C-

2012 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B-

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D-

2012 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C-

Los Guerreros vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

Original: B

2012 Redo: B+

2017 Redo: B

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH vs. Booker T vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2012 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2017 Redo: C+

I must have been in a REALLY bad mood when I watched the main event for the second time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/02/20/survivor-series-2002-the-longest-rant-about-anything-ive-ever-done/

And the 2012 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/10/survivor-series-count-up-2002/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Crown Jewel: I’m Thinking Of Wrestlemania XVII

IMG Credit: WWE

Crown Jewel
Date: November 2, 2018
Location: King Saud University, Stadium, Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

We’re back on the other side of the world this time and things aren’t exactly going well. The focal point of the show is D-Generation X vs. the Brothers of Destruction with Shawn Michaels coming out of retirement in a detail that has been forgotten in the whole ordeal. Other than that we’re going to have a new Universal Champion today as Braun Strowman and Brock Lesnar face off for the title vacated by Roman Reigns. Let’s get to it.

The video screen is in the shape of a crown for a nice touch.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Rusev

Nakamura is defending. Rusev throws him into the corner for some right hands and a shoulder to the ribs, followed by a suplex for one. A kick to the knee cuts Rusev down and we hit the front facelock. That stays on for a good while until Rusev pops up with a spinwheel kick. The Machka kick misses and Nakamura throws some right hands, only to get caught by the Machka kick a few seconds later.

It’s time to stomp on the spine but Nakamura kicks him in the head as well. The sliding knee gets two and Nakamura goes up for the knee but dives straight into the superkick for two. Nakamura bails to the ropes to avoid the Accolade and now the middle rope knee connects. Kinshasa is countered into the Accolade but Nakamura headbutts him low for another break. Now Kinshasa can connect to retain the title at 9:32.

Rating: D+. Just a match really and there’s nothing wrong with that to open things up. This could have been on almost any given house show and for a Kickoff Show match, that’s perfectly fine. Nakamura needs something to motivate him though and that would start with an actual feud for the title instead of these one off title defenses.

The opening video talks about the big matches tonight. Not much to that one.

Here’s Hulk Hogan to open the show as your host for the evening, complete with pyro. Your annoying idea of the show: a sparkling sound whenever a graphic comes on or leaves the screen. Hogan talks about how the power of Hulkamania is stronger than ever right here at the Crown Jewel jack. He’s happy to be here and the show starts now. This was just a glorified cameo.

We welcome a Saudi government official.

There’s an Arabic announce team at ringside.

Most of the people in the tournament are getting a quick sound byte which is them saying they’ll win and how important this is to them.

World Cup of Wrestling First Round: Rey Mysterio vs. Randy Orton

Both wrestlers have their resumes read off before their entrances for a little change of pace. Rey is in a singlet top, possibly for reasons of tattoos. Some kicks to the legs have Orton in early trouble and another kick to the head puts him down. He’s fine enough to dropkick Mysterio out of the air for two though and things slow down. The slow stomping begins but Rey headbutts his way out of a superplex attempt. Rey speeds things back up and hits the springboard middle rope crossbody. A spinning DDT gets two but the 619 is reversed into the hanging DDT. Back up and Rey grabs a quick rollup for the pin out of nowhere at 5:33.

Rating: C-. I can’t say I’m surprised about the fast match here as there’s a lot to get through and there’s a lot of other stuff going on that is taking its own time. Mysterio winning is the right call as the underdog is a story that tells itself. This was nothing special but it was the right result and didn’t overstay its welcome.

Post match Orton hits an RKO and throws Mysterio outside. Rey gets dropped ribs first onto the announcers’ table and is left laying.

Miz says there is no stopping him from winning.

World Cup of Wrestling First Round: Jeff Hardy vs. The Miz

We get the resumes again, and it really shows how frequently titles change anymore and how little a reign means. Miz grabs a headlock to start and poses, earning himself a hiptoss. The Skull Crushing Finale is countered into a rollup for two but Miz kicks him in the chest. A chinlock goes on for a bit as the announcers talk about Cleveland sports being so bad. Some running dropkicks in the corner rock Jeff but he’s fine enough to come out with a clothesline.

The legdrop between the legs into the basement dropkick gets two and the Whisper in the Wind is good for the same. Miz is fine enough to kick him in the leg but the Figure Four is broken up. Jeff kicks him to the floor and runs the barricade for the clothesline. Back in and Miz grabs a rollup but gets caught with his feet on the ropes. Jeff tries the Twist of Fate but gets reversed into the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 6:58.

Rating: D+. It’s very clear that they’re doing the stadium style matches and not veering from the greatest hits playbook as the fans might not be familiar with the product. There’s nothing wrong with that as it makes perfect sense for the location, but it doesn’t do much for the fans watching elsewhere. The match was watchable enough, though they didn’t exactly have time to go anywhere and it was clear they weren’t going to be putting in the harder effort.

World Cup of Wrestling First Round: Seth Rollins vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title of course and Lio Rush is here for the hype. Lashley shoves Rollins down without much effort and we hear about all of Lashley’s athletic accomplishments. A spinebuster drops Rollins for two and Lashley sends him face first into the turnbuckle. That means a seated full nelson and a Downward Spiral cuts off Rollins’ comeback.

With Rush having been quiet (or at least off the microphone) throughout the entire match so far, Rollins finally fights up with a kick to the head to send Lashley outside. There’s the required suicide dive, though Rollins comes up holding his already weakened neck. The Buckle Bomb is broken up but Rollins slips away and hits the Stomp out of nowhere for the pin at 5:26.

Rating: C. The time issues are killing these matches and there’s no hiding that. Rollins beating Lashley is fine but it really should take more than five minutes for him to pull it off. Lashley’s downward spiral continues as it’s been a good while since he actually won a match. Rollins should make the finals here, or at least not lose clean anywhere along the line.

Kurt Angle says no one believes he can win this tournament, but no one believed in him during the Olympics either.

World Cup of Wrestling First Round: Kurt Angle vs. Dolph Ziggler

Drew McIntyre is out with Ziggler. Dolph goes for the leg to start but Angle throws him down with no issue. They head to the mat with Ziggler actually getting the better of it as the fans chant for Angle a bit. Back up and the belly to belly sets up the German suplexes on Ziggler, including the eternally teased one off the apron. Instead they head to the floor with Ziggler sending him into the steps, followed by a neckbreaker for two back inside.

The chinlock goes on as Cole talks about Angle not competing since Wrestlemania. Yeah dude I’d like to forget Greatest Royal Rumble too. Or the battle royal that got him into this match. Angle fights up and grabs the rolling German suplexes for two more as Kurt isn’t exactly going outside of his comfort zone here.

Ziggler’s DDT gets the same but the Fameasser misses, setting up the Angle Slam for Kurt’s own near fall. The ankle lock is broken up and now the Fameasser connects for two. Kurt is fine enough to slap on the ankle lock so Ziggler rolls through. A missed charge sends Angle into the post and the Zig Zag is enough to put him away at 8:17.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t so much bad, but much more hard to watch. Angle just doesn’t have it anymore but it’s impossible to get that through his head. This was a bunch of greatest hits (a common occurrence tonight) and I can’t say I’m surprised that Angle wasn’t allowed to go out there twice in a row. Ziggler going forward makes sense, though it wasn’t exactly a great match either way.

The announcers run down some of the remaining matches.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. The Bar

Big E. and Kofi are challenging here and New Day comes out on a magic carpet and throw out the pancakes. The announcers make Aladdin jokes, which do make this a little easier to watch. Big Show is here with the Bar because he’s big all over. The world you see. Big E. drives Sheamus into the corner to start and we hit that hip swiveling. A shoulder gives Big E. one as the announcers talk about Sheamus being very underrated. I like the guy and yeah he kind of is, but there’s something that feels weird about him being a four time World Champion.

Cesaro comes in to monkey flip Kofi, who lands on his feet. The trombone plays on as Cesaro charges into a dropkick for two, followed by a crossbody for the same. A whip into the corner lets Show get in some choking/face squeezing though and Kofi is in trouble. Some knee drops set up the armbar before it’s back to Cesaro for the gutwrench suplex. The chinlock goes on again, as the pace of the match stays at a low level.

Kofi fights up and kicks Sheamus away but he gets driven right back into the champs’ corner for a backdrop/Jackhammer combination (Cesaro loaded up a suplex with Sheamus holding the legs and flipping Kofi back into the Jackhammer) for two more. The next comeback attempt actually works and it’s Sheamus missing a charge into the post (that’s becoming WAY too common these days around here), allowing the hot tag to Big E.

The Rock Bottom out of the corner gets two on Sheamus but the spear through the ropes hits a raised knee. A spinning kick to the face puts Cesaro on the floor and Kofi follows him out with a dive. Big E. gets shoved into the corner and the referee falls down getting out of the way, allowing Show to punch E. in the face. The Brogue Kick is enough to retain the titles at 10:33.

Rating: C. Probably the match of the night here and it was firmly below its ceiling, which wasn’t that high in the first place. It’s a match that has been seen before and featured a long heat segment. The additional time helped a little big but it’s still nothing that we haven’t seen a few times. Again, it felt like a house show match, and that’s not meant as a compliment.

Miz talks about how his throat was banged up in his first match but nothing is stopping him from ending Mysterio’s story and becoming Best in the World.

Mysterio says he’s banged up, but you can’t put a number on his heart. He’s been underestimated before and it’s never stopped him before, just like it won’t here.

World Cup of Wrestling Semifinals: The Miz vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is banged up from the Orton attack and has lost the singlet. Miz tries to speed things up to start but gets taken down, only to avoid a kick to the face. Rey gets sent outside, slides back in, and hits a slingshot dropkick through the ropes. There’s the sliding splash underneath the bottom rope but it bangs up Rey’s ribs all over again. Not the brightest idea in the world Rey, but that’s never stopped him before.

Back in and Mysterio’s charge is reversed into an Alley Oop faceplant in a display of power you don’t get from Miz very often. The rib work continues with Miz putting on the bow and arrow, with Graves talking about Miz’s black belt in martial arts. A bodyscissors is slightly less martial artsy and Rey is sent ribs first to the floor. You certainly can’t fault the logic in Miz’s plan and an abdominal stretch makes things even worse.

Rey finally gets in a tornado DDT for the double knockdown and it’s time for the comeback. Right hands and a hurricanrana send Miz into the corner but he reverses the sitout bulldog into the Finale or a pretty close two. The same rollup that finished Orton earlier gets two here and there’s the 619. Rey loads up the top rope splash but it lands on the raised knees to give Miz the pin at 11:11.

Rating: C+. It’s amazing what a simple story and the extra time can do for you. This was far from a classic or anything but it was a good, eleven minute match. Miz winning clean again is a little jarring but he came in with an advantage in the first place. Mysterio going to the finals would have made a lot of sense for the underdog story but Miz could do some great bragging if he wins the whole thing.

Rollins says his back is against the wall and that’s where he does his best work.

World Cup of Wrestling Semifinals: Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title again and McIntyre is with Ziggler. They go to the mat to start and that’s a standoff. Er, crawl off in this case. Seth goes for the ankle that was injured by Angle earlier but gets headlocked for his efforts. Rollins fights up and holds his neck but is fine enough to send Ziggler outside. With Ziggler being thrown back inside, McIntyre stares Rollins down so Dolph can grab a DDT for two and injure the neck even more. A neckbreaker sets up another chinlock and it’s off to some choking on the ropes.

The announcers talk about Seth’s bad back, despite the neck being the focal point for the last few minutes. That and, you know, Rollins holding his neck for most of the match. Sometimes sticking to the script isn’t as important as what’s right in front of you. Ziggler starts getting cocky again but is smart enough to hit another neckbreaker. The kickout starts the frustration though and it’s off to a bodyscissors with a neck crank at the same time.

Back up and Ziggler’s running DDT is countered into a rollup for two and it’s off to the pinfall reversal sequence. Rollins picks up a sunset flip and tries the Buckle Bomb, which is reversed into a Code Red for two more. The ripcord knee gives Rollins two but here’s McIntyre on the apron for a distraction. That doesn’t go very well as Ziggler is thrown outside, setting up the big dive to take them both out.

Back in and the Stomp misses, allowing Ziggler to hit the Fameasser for two of his own. Ziggler goes up for the sole purpose of the running superplex but Rollins’ neck gives out on the Falcon Arrow, allowing Dolph to hit the Zig Zag for the best near fall of the match. Rollins is right back up and diving onto McIntyre and he shoves Ziggler off the top, only to have McIntyre do the same to Rollins, who crashes to the mat. The superkick gives Ziggler the pin at 13:06.

Rating: C+. Well it wasn’t clean so they got the important part right, but are we really getting Ziggler vs. Miz as the final? That’s uh, quite the interesting choice for a final and not something that many people were likely to expect. They had a good match here again, which isn’t that much of a surprise, with the neck being a perfectly fine story. Again: the time made a huge difference here and it’s no surprise that the match was good given the extra work they were able to put in.

Ziggler says that wasn’t an upset and the next time you see him, he’ll be the Best in the World.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe, which is really just a recap of their feud from a few weeks ago without any mention of AJ winning the anything goes match in Australia. We also see AJ vs. Daniel Bryan on Tuesday and Joe running in to choke them both out to set up this match. Again: not the most ideal setup, but completely acceptable given the circumstances and the most logical path they had.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

AJ is defending. They go straight at it after the Big Match Intros with AJ kicking at the knee to put Joe down in a hurry. A single right hand to the head puts Joe down (that’s a rare one) and they head outside with AJ slipping off Joe’s shoulder and posting him in some violence you don’t often see from him. Joe drops him face first onto the barricade and the leg is fine enough to hit the suicide dive, sending AJ hard into the announcers’ table. You can see Joe go into the angry face and that isn’t likely to be a good thing.

Back in and Joe hits a corner enziguri for two, setting up the neck crank. AJ fights up and hits the Pele but Joe is too big for the Styles Clash. Instead it’s a shot to the face to put Joe down but he ducks the Phenomenal Forearm. The snap powerslam gives Joe two and one heck of a clothesline is good for the same.

The Calf Crusher is broken up in a hurry and Joe is right back with the Koquina Clutch. AJ is smart enough to grab the bad leg though and Joe has to go back to the ropes. That’s quite the smart move. With the submissions not working, it’s another Pele and the Phenomenal Forearm to retain the title at 11:11.

Rating: B-. The matches on the show keep getting better and again, that’s not exactly surprising given who was in there. These two know each other very well and while the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt, at least they put in some effort. That being said, giving them eleven minutes wasn’t exactly long enough to make the match work as well as it could have been. Good, but not as great as their other matches.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Braun Strowman

The title is vacant coming in and Paul Heyman and Baron Corbin are at ringside. Heyman says that we might as well get it out of the way and introduces Lesnar as the new champion. Corbin gets in and hits Strowman with the title, setting up the F5 for two. Another F5 gets two more as we’re just now a minute into the match. The third F5 gets the third two and Lesnar loads up another, but this time it sends Strowman outside. Strowman is back in at nine so Lesnar takes off the gloves. Another F5 is countered and Lesnar runs into a big boot, only to come back with another F5 to get the title back at 3:16.

Rating: Thomas Jefferson Sucka. I knew it. Deep down inside, I knew it. When I did my preview of this show, I said I was scared that they would do exactly what they did here but said I was going to give them the benefit of the doubt, because this was the stupidest thing they could do with this match. Lesnar is likely going back to UFC (or at least teasing the heck out of doing so) to set up a match for their World Title and that means SEVERAL MORE MONTHS without the title being around.

We had about two and a half months of Lesnar not being champion, with almost two weeks of that being spent with the title vacated. Now we’re RIGHT BACK WHERE WE WERE LAST YEAR but with no Roman Reigns to come and save us. Who in the world is supposed to take the title from Lesnar now? Strowman just got squashed, Rollins and Ambrose are going to be fighting each other for a LONG time, and…..dang who else is left? McIntyre? I can’t imagine they’d pull the trigger on him, even though it would be a good move at this point. Let’s just get it out of the way: Lesnar is probably holding it until Reigns gets back isn’t he?

This should have been Strowman’s night and instead, it was the fork in his main event career. No one is going to want to see him fight Lesnar again and now we need someone else to go after the title. Strowman, now weakened, can continue his feud with McIntyre, because Lesnar isn’t going to be around. Yeah the title belt to the head kept this from being clean, but my goodness they had everything there for Strowman to look like the real monster.

I do not get this. We just spent OVER A YEAR waiting on someone to stop Lesnar and now he’s just right back as champion. It would be like a movie ending with the good guys FINALLY winning and then the sequel coming out with the villains having taken over again. That might work for Star Wars, but at least they had the decency to wait about twenty five years instead of two months. This felt like the move that would annoy the fans who criticized Crown Jewel the most, and that’s not the kind of move that is going to do the company a lot of good. I do not get this.

Wait…do I not even get McIntyre vs. Strowman out of this? Are they going with Corbin over McIntyre now? Is McIntyre still going to be stuck as Ziggler muscle even longer? All because Lesnar needed to get the title again and sit on the sidelines with the thing while the rest of the roster fights over nothing? WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS???

We run down the Survivor Series card, which is all champions vs. champions again and two weeks from Sunday, because of course we only get that much time between pay per views. Again. Including AJ vs. Lesnar again, because AJ never lost the title and Lesnar lost it for all of two months of about a year and a half.

Shane McMahon comes out to watch the World Cup Finals. Did you know money talks? I didn’t know if that was clear enough given….well the fact that we’re here. Corbin is here as well.

World Cup of Wrestling Finals: The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler is with McIntyre and Miz is fired from Smackdown if he loses. Actually hang on as McIntyre is sent to the back. Miz jumps an annoyed Ziggler and sends him outside…but messes up his knee following Ziggler out. The bell hasn’t rung as a limping Miz sends him into the steps. The referee comes over to check on Miz, who insists he’s fine. Shane is watching and the referee says Miz can’t compete. Miz insists that he can because he’s never been injured (sounds like part of the Daniel Bryan feud) but Shane says the match isn’t going to be a forfeit….because he’s taking Miz’s place. My goodness this is happening.

World Cup of Wrestling Finals: Shane McMahon vs. Dolph Ziggler

Corbin freaks out as Shane is in a shirt (which comes off to reveal some jacked arms) and jeans. Shane slugs away (work with me here) to start and hits the jumping elbow to the jaw as the announcers have no idea how this is legal. Corbin grabs Shane so he gets ejected as well. The Zig Zag connects for two so Ziggler rips at his face until Shane comes back with more of his strikes. A DDT and a catapult into the corner sets up Coast to Coast (barely making contact) to make Shane the BEST IN THE WORLD at 2:37.

Shane celebrates like a crazy man and holds up the cup as the announcers are stunned. To recap, the hierarchy is now Brock Lesnar (best in the Universe), Shane McMahon (best in the World) and AJ Styles (best in WWE). The youngest of those: Brock, at a spry 41 years old. Shane: “I can’t believe it!” Oh….I think I can Shane. You just won a tournament you weren’t even in. I can believe anything at this point.

So, to recap, we just spent a good month building up this tournament and it’s all for the sake of Smackdown vs. Raw at Survivor Series (which you know is coming, mainly because they’ve advertised it tonight) with SHANE MCMAHON winning a tournament of eight former World Champions? All so he and precious Stephanie (assuming she’s done with her cause of the week) can argue again?

For the last few weeks, I’ve ranted and raved about how this tournament means nothing and how it’s going to be another version of the Greatest Royal Rumble, where the big match of the show would up meaning absolutely nothing. At this point, I think I’d prefer that. Survivor Series used to be my favorite pay per view, but now it’s being used for the sake of pushing Shane vs. Stephanie (just like last year) in a feud that stopped mattering the day after Survivor Series (just like last year). This tournament was little more than a way to get that ready and we were stupid enough to believe it was for anything else.

But Shane? You pick him to go in there for an injured Miz? Was Miz supposed to be the sympathetic face out of this whole thing? I know Shane is going to be in the Raw vs. Smackdown match at the pay per view because that’s what he does, but after the match they did before this, I don’t think I can imagine something even dumber. That being said, I haven’t been able to stop smiling since it happened.

Lesnar vs. Strowman is something that is going to cause issues for months to come. Shane’s big moment is going to stop meaning anything by the end of November and it’s not like this big story was any kind of a secret. It was just a matter of how they contrived the story this year and it happened to be a tournament that seemed pretty meaningless on the surface. I’m not really that mad about this, because it’s almost far from the worst thing this family has ever done in this company. They did this to set up Survivor Series and it’s going to be all about Shane vs. Stephanie. You knew it was coming, and this was part of it.

We recap D-Generation X vs. the Brothers of Destruction. They’re all old, they apparently hate each other now because twenty years of beating each other up wasn’t done out of love, and this match is going to get more time than any two matches on the show, because that’s the reward you get for being old. Oh and Shawn Michaels is returning to the ring for the first time in eight and a half years. I mention that at the end because WWE has somehow turned that into a pretty minimal detail. I’m as shocked as you are.

D-Generation X vs. Brothers of Destruction

DX has a ton of glow sticks and both have a bunch of NXT logos on their gear, including the entire back of HHH’s vest. That’s very cool of them to talk up the future so much. Now step back and let four people with a combined age of 206 have a horrible match for half an hour. Shawn in gear and bald looks like an alien. Or a character in a sitcom in an episode where everyone loses their hair.

HHH and Kane start things off and stare at each other for over a minute with a lot of trash talking included. The first right hand to the mask just annoys Kane so he uppercuts a crotch chopping HHH down (before he could do something that would likely get him killed in this country….wherever it is). HHH cranks on the arm and tags Shawn in, who comes in off the top with an ax handle to the arm to a limited pop while Cole is in the middle of a line about how interesting it is that Shawn comes in off the top.

A swinging neckbreaker puts Kane down and the fans just aren’t reacting, mainly because they probably don’t know much about the history here. The threat of Sweet Chin Music sends Kane to the corner and it’s off to Undertaker as Shawn looks a little scared. Shawn steps up to him but gets the throat slit. The crotch chop actually makes air so Shawn gets kicked in the face. Undertaker cranks on the arm but HHH breaks up Old School. Everything breaks down with Shawn being caught in the Tree of Woe and HHH being thrown over him and out to the floor.

The Brothers clear the ring and DX has a conference on the floor, which apparently includes HHH telling Shawn that he’s torn his pectoral muscle (already confirmed by WWE with surgery scheduled). Back in and double chokeslams are broken up with the Brothers being knocked to the floor instead. That earns DX another beating and now Old School connects on Shawn. The big boot in the corner misses though and HHH comes in but clearly can’t use the arm.

We get to the slow beating portion but HHH avoids the elbow drop and grabs a DDT. It’s back to Shawn for the forearm (with almost no elevation) and the nip up (FINALLY a strong reaction from Cole) but he can’t slam Kane. For some reason Kane can’t gorilla press Shawn though and it’s a double suplex to put Kane down again. The top rope elbow connects on Kane but Sweet Chin Music is countered into a chokeslam. Undertaker comes in again for Snake Eyes into the big boot but Shawn pops up with a superkick. There’s no HHH though so Undertaker sends Shawn outside to the announcers’ table.

HHH breaks up a Tombstone and sends Kane into the steps. After a loudly called spot to Undertaker, HHH gets whipped into the barricade, but for some reason Undertaker crashes into it as well. Kane hits a chokeslam to put HHH through the announcers’ table (without moving the monitors) and Undertaker hits the apron legdrop on Shawn. The fans think this is awesome and then just cheer for Undertaker (because Kane still can’t get any love). HHH is done so it’s the Brothers taking turns on Shawn inside.

Undertaker chokes on Shawn as it seems like they’re not sure what to do next. Some elbows to the head keep Shawn in trouble and it’s off to the chinlock. Kane adds the sidewalk slam but gets crotched on top. Shawn manages to post Undertaker and goes up but Kane is waiting on him. They slug it out on the ropes with Shawn punching him so hard that Kane’s mask (and hair) fly off. That means the moonsault to the floor onto both Brothers, with Shawn’s face bouncing off the floor in a painful looking crash.

HHH is back up and comes in off the hot tag for more left handed chops. With HHH only able to use one arm, Cole thinks it’s a rib injury. The Pedigree and Tombstone are broken up, followed by the Pedigree connecting on Undertaker. HHH has to deal with Kane (masked again) though and gets pulled into Hell’s Gate. A superkick to Kane sends him into HHH and Undertaker to break up the hold and all four are down again. The Brothers are up first but the double Tombstones are broken up. Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree (understandably terrible) finishes Kane at 27:50.

Rating: D-. I’m giving them a break because of the injury (which probably changed a lot) but this was very similar to what had to be expected: a lot of laying around, a bunch of finishers, and the match being called epic because it went longer than the first round World Cup matches put together. This looked like four old men who hadn’t been told that they should have stopped a long time ago. It wasn’t a complete and utter disaster, but it was long, messy and a match that only felt like it existed because HHH decided it should.

The match just wasn’t very good. It had a few moments that weren’t bad, but a few moments over nearly twenty eight minutes don’t make those moments look good. They make the match feel long, which is the only way to describe this. All four of them need to go away as their time has passed. It was one thing when they were still doing well, but that’s not the case here and it hasn’t been for a long time now.

As for Shawn….he looked passable. Of course nowhere near the level he was at the peak of his career, but was anyone expecting that? Or even at the end of his career? It’s not going to be remembered as some incredible comeback, but rather as that time he came back and it was on that really bad show and didn’t completely embarrass himself. It could have been worse, but it’s not something that needed to happen.

Cole praises these four as “the four greatest of all time” as a ton of pyro ends the show.

Overall Rating: F. This show made me think of Wrestlemania XVII. That show very well may be the greatest card of all time with more masterpieces than you could find on almost any other show. With Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit, TLC II, Undertaker vs. HHH and Rock vs. Austin II and a bunch of other matches that didn’t mean much. That’s the same as this show. I mean, if you flip it around with one horrible thing after another that is.

The wrestling was, at best, worthy of a house show where they weren’t trying very hard. The best match of the night was Joe vs. AJ and that’s been done several times before, always at a higher level too. Other than that, you have two good tournament matches in the semifinals and four opening round matches which were watchable at best. Then Shane won the tournament, rendering the other six matches completely worthless, along with the finals themselves. What a great way of using over half of your card.

The interesting thing to me is how the show was mediocre (at best) until after the Styles vs. Joe match. The wrestling was watchable enough and while nothing had really happened, it wasn’t the worst show I’ve ever seen. There certainly wasn’t anything worth getting annoyed over or that left you scratching your head. Then the Lesnar deal happened.

That’s where everything fell off a cliff and there was no coming back. The wrestling stopped being good, the stories started being more about shock value than anything else and the main event felt like it was never going to end. That’s a problem when that was about the last third of the show after what wasn’t a great first two thirds. That doesn’t leave you much of anything and I’m not sure what positives you can get out of this.

When you break it down, you had a show where it didn’t look like there was a lot of energy (maybe the wrestlers were jetlagged, maybe they didn’t want to be there, maybe something else), where the big stuff that happened made you scratch your head and where the main event made you wonder when retirement homes started running wrestling shows. Or allowing moonsaults for that matter.

The problem is WWE bills these shows as some of the biggest of the year and they haven’t felt that way. So far they’ve felt like shows that are on a big stage but without the effort being put into them. I’m not saying the wrestlers weren’t trying because that wasn’t the case, but both shows in this country have felt flat. I know the fans are a completely different audience and they probably aren’t die hard followers of the product, but good wrestling can overcome that to a degree. I didn’t see that here and I didn’t see it back in April either.

At the end of the day, the shows just aren’t very good. While Greatest Royal Rumble was really boring, this one was brought down by bad choices. Lesnar is champion again and that’s just depressing. Shane is somehow the best in the world and now we’ll get to hear Stephanie complain about that for a few weeks. The old guys were given three times as long as they realistically should have had. Where is the good in this whole thing? In WWE’s bank accounts of course, but if that money doesn’t make the product better, I don’t see how that’s helping the fans at all, which was the case with this show too.

Results

Rey Mysterio b. Randy Orton – Rollup

The Miz b. Jeff Hardy – Skull Crushing Finale

Seth Rollins b. Bobby Lashley – Stomp

Dolph Ziggler b. Kurt Angle – Zig Zag

The Bar b. New Day – Brogue Kick to Big E.

The Miz b. Rey Mysterio – Miz blocked Mysterio’s top rope splash

Dolph Ziggler b. Seth Rollins – Superkick

AJ Styles b. Samoa Joe – Phenomenal Forearm

Brock Lesnar b. Braun Strowman – F5

Shane McMahon b. Dolph Ziggler – Coast to Coast

D-Generation X b. Brothers of Destruction – Pedigree to Kane

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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