Lucha Underground
Date: June 29, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

It’s the last regular show before the first week of Ultima Lucha, which will run for the next three shows. You can probably figure out most of the card from here but only a few matches have actually been announced. It should be interesting to see what Lucha Underground comes up with to get us there as they have some rather unique ways of setting up matches. Let’s get to it.

The recap looks at Mil Muertes’ latest death and feud with King Cuerno, plus Prince Puma challenging Rey Mysterio for Ultima Lucha Dos.

The Trios Titles will be on the line at Ultima Lucha with Fenix/Drago/Aerostar challenging PJ Black/Johnny Mundo/Jack Evans. The show now has its own graphics to really make it look important.

King Cuerno vs. Mil Muertes

That’s quite the opener. Cuerno gets Muertes to chase him around to start but Muertes just spears him down back inside, which Striker says is like the reaper’s trident. He’s kind of a weird guy. Muertes fires off some chops, which Striker say are designed to disorientate your opponent. I thought they were designed to hurt your opponent’s chest but that’s just me. A chokeslam gets two for Mil but Cuerno comes back with a running knee and dropkick to set up the big dive through the ropes.

The referee gets taken out as well so Cuerno grabs a chair. Of note here, Striker talks about some soldiers being in the crowd and then calls the bumped referee a casualty of war. Bad choice of words there. Muertes no sells a chair to the head and blasts Cuerno with a clothesline. The chair to Cuerno’s back makes it even worse but Mil misses a charge and goes head first into the chair in the corner, allowing Cuerno to grab a rollup (and the ropes) for the pin at 4:30.

Rating: C+. Striker driving me up the wall aside, this was a good enough brawl to set up the pretty obvious gimmick rematch at Ultima Lucha. Cuerno has always been one of my favorites around here so it’s cool to see him getting a push and the biggest win he’s ever had in the promotion, though I’m sure he’ll get destroyed in the rematch.

Taya and Ivelisse come in to see Dario and get catty with each other from the start. Dario makes a match between them for Ultima Lucha to see who the baddest woman is. As they’re leaving, Catrina comes in and calls Ivelisse a little girl. Apparently Muertes wants a rematch with Cuerno at Ultima Lucha but Dario lists off everything Catrina and Muertes have done to him. Catrina doesn’t care and asks for it to be a death match. Dario actually agrees and Catrina disappears. Dario: “Women.”

Prince Puma vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

This should be good. Rey Mysterio is out with Azteca. They start fast (of course) by running the ropes with Puma missing a kick to the head and a standing moonsault before they trade armdrags. Striker begs Vampiro to help him with this play by play but he gets a break as the guys shake hands off a standoff. Dragon slaps him in the face and they run the ropes again with both guys sliding to the floor. Azteca runs back in for a suicide dive but gets caught on Puma’s shoulders (surprising power display) and sent back first into the post.

Back in and Dragon’s middle rope hurricanrana sends Puma flying and a springboard hurricanrana takes him off the middle rope. A running forearm to the jaw staggers Puma again, allowing Dragon to hit his pop up DDT (the DDTJ) for two. Back up and Puma pulls Dragon off the middle rope into a Blue Thunder Bomb followed by some rolling suplexes for two. The 630 is broken up as Puma gets crotched and a super victory roll gets two for Dragon. Puma kicks him in the back of the head and a Michinoku Driver gets two more. A dropkick sets up the 630 to finally put Dragon away at 8:44.

Rating: B+. Really awesome stuff here and that’s all it was going to be. Azteca has hit the ground running in Lucha Underground and this does a good job of setting up Puma vs. Mysterio. Unfortunately it doesn’t do much to set up Azteca vs. Lotus, which isn’t the strongest feud in the first place. Still though, great match.

Post match Puma says that’s Mysterio at Ultima Lucha.

Here are Son of Havoc, the Mack, Cage and Texano in the ring for a chat with Dario. The boss has plans for the four of them for Ultima Lucha: the Unique Opportunity Tournament. The winner will receive the most unique opportunity that he’s ever offered so give it everything you have. The tournament starts next week but he thinks they should get a start right now so the brawl is on.

We run down the Ultima Lucha card. Those graphics really do add something.

Johnny Mundo vs. Fenix

Mundo flips off the crowd to make it clear that he is in fact the villain. Thanks for pointing that one out for us chum. Fenix starts with an early rollup attempt before a standing moonsault gets two. Mundo takes him into the corner for some choking, only to get chopped over and over and over. A quick C4 gets two for Mundo and we hit a double arm crank with a chinlock. Mundo spinebuster him for two and Taya gets involved with some choking.

Fenix superkicks him off the ropes though and dives out onto Johnny and Taya at the same time. We get a Super Calo reference before Striker says this is the fight of Fenix’s life. I’d think the Muertes match where he won the title was a bit bigger but who am I to argue with Striker. Fenix gets two more off a sunset bomb but Taya grabs his foot so Johnny can kick him in the head. The End of the World misses as Taya puts the Trios Title belt on the apron. Fenix is right back up and chopping Johnny on the top, setting up a super C4 for no count as Taya has the referee. A belt shot puts Fenix away at 7:53.

Rating: B-. I’m not wild on the WWE style finish but at least it fits Johnny’s character to perfection and helps set up the Trios Titles match at Ultima Lucha. Johnny and Taya are perfect together and you could see them being a thing in real life which always helps. Fenix has very quietly become one of the best performers in this company and it’s always fun to see him in the ring.

Post match the other four members of the trios come out for the big brawl with Ivelisse following them to go after Taya. A huge brawl ends the show with the good guys (and Ivelisse) cleaning house.

Overall Rating: B+. Good wrestling and a VERY strong build towards Ultima Lucha makes this an awesome show. I love the fact that it’s a three week show, basically guaranteeing that the matches don’t have to be as rushed as they were last year. I’m looking forward to the show more than ever now and that’s exactly how I should feel with a week to go. Really well done here as I’ve come to expect from this promotion.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Ring of Honor
Date: June 29, 2016
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Andrew Gervani, Nigel McGuinness

This is another of those odd weeks where we should be past a pay per view but instead it’s a stand alone show which might feature a midcard feud not big enough to get on the actual pay per view. Or it might be an hour long look at the Bullet Club, which could be almost any given episode of the show. Let’s get to it.

Thankfully the opening narration tells us that we’ll be back in two weeks with the Best in the World fallout. Therefore tonight is all about the Women of Honor division, which is almost never mentioned on the regular TV show.

Opening sequence.

Veda Scott/Amber Gallows/Allysin Kay vs. Sumie Sakai/Thunderkitty/Crazy Mary Dobson

Kay is better known as Sienna in TNA. Gallows (the Bullet Babe, as in Bullet Club BECAUSE OF COURSE IT IS) starts with Kitty, who claims to be 95 years old. Amber beats her down to start and shrugs off a faceplant before it’s off to Dobson vs. Kay with Allysin catching a cross body in a fisherman’s buster. Scott comes in and misses some kicks, allowing Dobson to dropkick her in the chest.

Sumie comes in for two off a nice northern lights suplex, followed by a double dropkick with Kay helping things out a bit. Everything breaks down and Gallows offers a distraction so Kay can kick Sumie in the face. Scott grabs something like Stratusfaction and we take a break. Back with Gallows grabbing an X Factor before stopping to say Too Sweet. Sakai gets in a fisherman’s buster and the hot tag brings in Mary as house is cleaned.

Everything breaks down again and we get a Tower of Doom, followed by the parade of finishers. Dobson stomps on Allysin’s foot and kicks her in the head, setting up the Kaiju Killer (split legged moonsault) but Gallows makes a save. Kay gets in a discus lariat for the pin on Dobson at 9:45.

Rating: C-. This is going to be a long night. These matches fall under the category of “wrestling is cool because it’s wrestling” and that’s not a theory I really subscribe to. I need a story and some personalities and just calling someone CRAZY isn’t going to be enough. The match was fine enough but it was really just six women doing moves to each other for about ten minutes.

The other weird part is Scott is an evil attorney on the regular ROH shows and here she’s just a wrestler with no real character. There’s a disconnect there and ROH doesn’t do anything to explain it, other than saying we don’t usually like her. I need more than that and I don’t think we’re getting it here.

Faye Jackson vs. ODB

This is Faye’s debut and I’ve never liked ODB. Jackson isn’t sure what to do to start so ODB slaps her (own) chest and no sells a bad clothesline. A running splash in the corner crushes Jackson again and a better clothesline puts ODB down for two. We’re two minutes in and the announcers already declare it gutcheck time. Jackson hits three straight running Umaga Attacks in the corner (the Triple Spun Milkshake) for two but she can’t get ODB in a fireman’s carry. Instead ODB hits the middle rope Thesz press for the pin at 4:14.

Rating: D-. The match sucked and ODB continued to do everything that gets on my nerves about her. Jackson looked like a rookie out there and a lot of that probably has to do with how little ring time these women get. This show is rapidly falling downhill and a lot of that is due to having no reason to care about these women. Jackson is a rookie and that’s about all I know about her. Again, I need more than that.

Inside ROH is a pair of dueling promos from Hania and Mandy Leon before their match tonight.

Hania vs. Mandy Leon

Hania is billed as a huntress which feels like something out of GLOW though she looks like she’s carved out of stone. Leon on the other hand….how do I put this…..well simply put she looks great. Feeling out process to start until a test of strength doesn’t go anywhere. We get the eternally stupid suplex to break it up with both women laying on the mat and popping their shoulders up at two.

Hania flips her away and the overly choreographed stuff continues because that’s how a lot of people think wrestling works. They trade rollups for two each until Leon headscissors her out to the floor, only to have Hania trip her up and send Leon into the barricade. Back from a break with Hania getting two off a springboard missile dropkick. A victory roll gives Mandy the same but Hania gets two more off a spinwheel kick.

Mandy grabs a neckbreaker and hangs onto it for a fairly unique (and not that painful) submission, followed by a Stratusphere but she misses a moonsault. A double clothesline puts both of them down until Hania tries some YES Kicks. Mandy shrugs them off and grabs a bulldog, only to eat more kicks to the face. They trade reverse DDT attempts, only to have Mandy counter into a Koji Clutch. It’s right next to the ropes though so Hania gets in a Codebreaker for the pin at 13:46.

Rating: B. I was blown away by this as it really looked like two good looking women in their very revealing outfits (an aspect that worked very well here and there isn’t much other way to put it) but they were actually working hard. There’s A LOT of work to do for both of them but I got into the match and had fun watching it, even though I still don’t know much about either woman. Good stuff here and very interesting that Leon is better than just a talker.

BJ Whitmer talks about how awesome Kelly Klein is and says her name over and over again in an old school manager trick. The promo is about how strong of an athletic background she has and how serious she is about her training. That tells me more than I know about most of the women on this show in about thirty seconds.

Taeler Hendrix is tired of hearing about Klein because this is her company and we get in the ring with her.

Kelly Klein vs. Taeler Hendrix

BJ Whitmer and Truth Martini are in the respective corners. Klein grabs a quick abdominal stretch but Taeler reverses into one of her own. Hendrix grabs a rear naked choke but gets broken up as we take a break. Back with Klein sitting on the top rope with a chinlock before Hendrix cartwheels into a superkick. Kelly charges into a kick as well and a palm strike staggers her again. A spinning kick to the face gets two for Hendrix before she kisses Klein to set up a Tombstone for two. Klein doesn’t seem to care for the sexual assault and grabs a guillotine choke for the tap out at 6:32.

Rating: C. Not bad here and they have a character in Klein. Unfortunately there’s nowhere for them to go because the women are never featured on the TV show. The wrestling wasn’t bad and Hendrix comes off more like a character than a wrestler, which is exactly what this division really needs. You need someone to care about and someone reminiscent of a redheaded Paige is a good idea.

Overall Rating: C. Well it was different, though it seems to be a one week concept, which makes this a bit more difficult to care about. There was one strong match in here but I really don’t know enough about most of the women to get into the shows. For a one week concept I liked it though there isn’t enough to make this work every single time. A match here or there would be fine though and a nice change of pace over all the normal stuff they do on this show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01FWZZ2UA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Thunder
Date: February 7, 2001
Location: Bankcorpsouth Center, Tupelo, Mississippi
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

Amazingly enough, we’re coming in off a surprise heel turn this past Monday as Rick Steiner joined up with Flair’s group to reunited with his brother yet again. They really aren’t even hiding the fact that this is another NWO clone and I really don’t think anyone minds at this point. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Scott Steiner’s rough night, which means he wrestled about ten minutes over three matches.

Shane Helms vs. Kaz Hayashi

This is a qualifying match for a six man elimination #1 contenders match at SuperBrawl. Kaz flips out of a wristlock to start and runs over Shane with a shoulder. Shane flips up and it’s an early standoff. Kaz gets smart and kicks at the leg but his springboard DDT is countered into a northern lights suplex over the top. Helms hits a big cross body to the floor but bangs up his knee in the process.

Back in and Kaz moonsaults over and before headscissoring Shane right back to the floor. Kaz gets in a dive of his own but can’t hit a top rope hurricanrana. A good looking superkick puts Kaz down and a running neckbreaker does it again. Shane wants the Vertebreaker but here’s Chavo Guerrero for a distraction, allowing Kaz to grab a German suplex for the upset.

Rating: C+. This was a nice surprise and I can dig the idea of Chavo being worried about facing Helms again in the future and taking him out here. Kaz winning is a bit odd but there’s not much of a chance of him adse corner before breaking up an enziguri with another right hand. Smiley jumps over him in the corner and does a bit of dancing but stops to look for Glacier. A clothesline sets up the Seanton Bomb for the easy pin.

Post match Mark Jindrak comes in as a distraction so Shawn Stasiak can come in for the beatdown. Something is edited out as O’Haire came back in from the apron and kicks both guys down. The beatdown is on again until Palumbo makes the save.

Flair gives Sanders Konnan tonight.

Team Canada comes out with Storm picking Elix Skipper to face Cat.

The Cat vs. Elix Skipper

Cat superkicks him to start but Skipper pops up and starts hitting on Miss Jones. At least he has good taste. Skipper takes him to the floor for a whip into the barricade. Back in and Cat starts firing off the kicks, followed by a running ax handle and the Feliner for the quick pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as usual as being the Commissioner (which may have been on the line here but it wasn’t clear) doesn’t mean a ton aside from just opposing Flair. Skipper should be in the Cruiserweight Title hunt and Cat should be doing almost anything other than being a regular wrestler but at least he has a personality.

Post match Storm offers a distraction so Mike Awesome can take Cat out.

Totally Buff is ready for Kronik. They should be after facing them so many times.

Chavo Guerrero asks Wall to take out Rey Mysterio tonight. Hugh Morrus is heard laughing.

Kwee Wee asks a few jobbers (one of whom is Chris Harris) to fight him later tonight. One of them doesn’t take kindly to this and seems game later.

Flair tells Scott Steiner to worry about Nash and ignore everything else.

Lex Luger vs. Brian Adams

Adams sends him head first into the announcers’ table to start and drops him onto the barricade for good measure. They get inside for the first time with Adams raking his boots across the eyes, followed by some choking in the corner. Luger pulls him outside and sends Adams head first into the steps before a whip sends him into “the rail of pain.” Back in and we hit the posing, followed by a backbreaker for two.

Lex stays on the bad back with a suplex and even more posing. Now we go old school with a bearhug until Adams powers out and hits a backbreaker of his own. Cue Buff Bagwell but Adams drops him with a single right hand. The full nelson slam puts Luger away clean in a bit of a surprise.

Rating: D-. It’s rarely a good sign when the best thing you can say about a match is that it had a clean ending. Adams winning with a simple full nelson slam was a surprise but at least the interference didn’t mean anything. Also it’s nice to see Luger putting people over instead of fighting Goldberg on three straight pay per views as it seems he’s FINALLY learning his place.

Bryan Clark runs in for the post match save.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. The Wall

Wall has Chavo with him. As usual the announcers act like Rey is going to die because they’ve never watched Mysterio vs. a bigger guy. Rey goes after the knee to start but springboards into a one armed gorilla press. A sleeper has a bit more success on the big man until he drives Rey back first into the corner. Wall throws him outside so Chavo can get in some cheap shots.

Rey’s knee goes into the steps and Wall chokes him while standing on the announcers’ table. A hard whip sends Rey chest first into the buckle as the announcers think the match should be stopped. Wall misses a top rope legdrop and Rey hits the springboard seated senton with Chavo making the save. That earns him a big flip dive but here’s Hugh Morrus to electric chair Wall off the top and hit No Laughing Matter to give Rey the pin.

Rating: D. So to clarify, the greatest cruiserweight of all time has to get beaten down for five minutes and then saved by Hugh Morrus to set up a match between Morrus and Wall at SuperBrawl. Naturally they had no choice but to put these feuds together and have Mysterio look like a goon whose career was saved. At least he won though and that helps a lot. It was a rough way to get there but the right guy won and that helps a lot.

Mysterio and Morrus clean house post match.

Here’s Kwee Wee for his usual “I’m all man” speech. Tony: “Is it just me or is his hair crooked?” And that’s your latest reason why Kwee Wee is going nowhere. Kwee Wee calls out a fan and it’s time for a fight.

Kwee Wee vs. ???

A few right hands give Kwee Wee a pin.

Here’s the guy Kwee Wee called out earlier tonight with a missile dropkick and we have another match.

Kwee Wee vs. Johnny Dodson

Kwee Wee beats him down with ease and ends Dodson with a piledriver in just over a minute. It would be nice for this to go somewhere but I doubt Kwee Wee is considered important enough to get such attention.

Konnan vs. Mike Sanders

For some reason I can’t picture the Mississippi crowd being that into Konnan’s odd way of speaking. Tony: “Word.” Konnan gets two off a rollup to start but Sanders rolls into a crucifix for two of his own. The mat work goes to Konnan as he grabs something like a standing figure four but sitting on the leg instead of pulling back on it.

The announcers talk about the new owners doing something about Flair as Sanders drops a knee on Konnan’s chest. A clothesline puts Konnan down for no cover because Sanders is busy yelling at the crowd. Sanders puts on a cobra clutch for a bit before Konnan comes back with the rolling lariat. The X Factor sets up the Tequila Sunrise for the clean submission.

Rating: D+. Sanders is someone who looks like he has potential but doesn’t seem like he’s going anywhere. Konnan is actually not the worst worker in the world as his normal stuff is entertaining enough though it’s hard to get into whatever nonsense he says before the match. It’s also amazing how much better he is when he’s just being himself and not pulling “pranks” with the Filthy Animals.

Don Harris says he now has a manager’s license. Normally I would ask how bad the commission that issues licenses must be but it seems that they’re avoiding Harris Brothers matches so they’re smarter than I am.

Jeff Jarrett/Rick Steiner vs. Insiders

The Insiders clean house to start and thankfully they’re not wasting the “big” match of the Insiders vs. the Steiners on a nothing show like this. Page and Jarrett get things going with Jeff taking a hard clothesline (with authority according to Tenay) before getting crotched against the post. Rick comes in and blasts Page in the face because he’s Rick Steiner and therefore gets to beat up anyone he wants.

It’s time for the heels to take turns beating on Page before Steiner slaps on a chinlock about two minutes in. That’s never a good sign which is why it’s standard Rick Steiner procedure. Jeff puts on a sleeper because he’s a master of the hold according to Tony. Don’t you have to win a match with it to be a master?

Page escapes with the belly to back (a master wouldn’t allow that) but Rick comes in with a belly to belly to prevent the hot tag. Page finally punches Jarrett down and it’s Nash coming in for a bunch of right hands and boots. The Jackknife puts Steiner away and for once that’s a bad ending as you don’t want a new champion losing when Jarrett is right there.

Rating: D+. This was fine, albeit the same boring main event you would expect on Thunder. Page is always going to be solid and Jeff can be his normally dull self but the other two are clearly just there because they’re paid to be and aren’t going to put in any effort above the minimum. The clean ending was nice for a change, though it should have been Jarrett.

Scott Steiner, Totally Buff and Kronik come out for the standoff to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Just a bunch of bad wrestling and more of the same boring stable vs. stable feud that has been dominating the company for weeks now. It’s not the worst story or anything but it’s so repetitive at this point because WCW has done it so many times in the last few years. So many of the stories are stuck in limbo and it’s getting rough to sit through every single week. At least Rick Steiner lost though and that’s always a good thing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01FWZZ2UA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

http://411mania.com/wrestling/domestic-assault-charges-against-jerry-lawler-dismissed/

You kind of had to expect him to be back immediately after this was cleared up.  It’s not like Otunga was going to be a long term replacement (just not enough experience though he was fine in the little time he was in the role) so it should be nice to have Lawler back in his heel role.

http://411mania.com/wrestling/hideo-itami-returns-from-injury-at-nxt-house-show/

Good for him, though it’s going to take some time before he gets his rhythm back and he wasn’t exactly lighting up the world before he left.

Smackdown
Date: June 30, 2016
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, Byron Saxton

We’re running out of Smackdowns on Thursday nights as we only have two more weeks before heading over to the live world for a major change. It’s also interesting to see how things go without Roman Reigns around, though the more interesting thing will be seeing how he is when he comes back. Let’s get to it.

Tonight it’s Cesaro vs. Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Apollo Crews for a US Title shot later in the night.

Cesaro arrived earlier and said he’ll win after his uppercut party.

Apollo Crews says this is a huge opportunity and sometimes the impossible is possible.

Sheamus is glad Crews is in this match because he can have some fun before winning the title.

Del Rio doesn’t know who Crews is but he’ll win the title tonight.

Opening sequence.

Cesaro vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Apollo Crews vs. Sheamus

Winner gets a US Title match later tonight. Cesaro and Crews actually pair off to start before Sheamus and Crews fall out to the floor. Cesaro hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on Del Rio before heading to the apron for a flip dive to take out Sheamus. Del Rio sends Cesaro into the barricade and then the post before getting Sheamus to help with some double teaming back inside. The Brogue Kick is broken up as Crews comes in to cross body both heels, leaving Alberto to hit a Backstabber on Sheamus.

Back from a break with Crews breaking up the top rope double stomp, allowing Cesaro to hit a high cross body for two on Del Rio. Sheamus breaks up a Swing with the Irish Curse but Del Rio superkicks Sheamus to break up the Cloverleaf. The cross armbreaker has Sheamus in trouble until Crews makes another save. It’s time for the uppercut party until Sheamus plants him with a tilt-a-whirl slam. Crews hits a cross body to put Sheamus on the floor, leaving Cesaro to Swing Del Rio into the Sharpshooter for the tap out at 9:44.

Rating: C. Crews looked good here but more importantly he looked like he belonged. I’m sure we’re going to get Cesaro vs. Del Rio at Battleground so it’s nice to have them do something different before we get there. The same is true of Crews vs. Sheamus, which is just continuing because that’s how feuds work in WWE.

Post match Del Rio sends Cesaro into the steps as Rusev comes out for the title match.

US Title: Rusev vs. Cesaro

Rusev is defending and Cesaro has a banged up shoulder from going into the steps. Cesaro fires off uppercuts to start but gets stomped down and kneed in the ribs. Rusev pounds on his own chest but Cesaro muscles him over with a suplex for two. The champ grabs a bearhug but Cesaro fights out and hits the springboard uppercut.

Rusev goes up top, only to get dropkicked to the floor for another cannonball off the apron. Back in and a swinging Rock Bottom puts Cesaro again and sets up more Bulgarian shouting. Cesaro uppercuts and clotheslines his way back out but can’t get the Sharpshooter as Rusev kicks at the ribs. A kick to the head sets up the Accolade and Cesaro taps at 6:13.

Rating: C+. Well that happened. This whole thing took about half an hour and now we’re done. I mean, Heaven forbid they let Cesaro have this match on pay per view when we can have Del Rio vs. Cesaro and maybe even Titus vs. Rusev all over again. Instead Cesaro earned a title shot and lost it in the span of about forty minutes. All nice and clean, just like that.

Post break, Rusev thinks Independence Day should be renamed Rusev Day. However, this Monday he’ll be defending the US Title against Titus O’Neal. Lana doesn’t seem worried and she really shouldn’t be.

Special Olympics video.

Dana Brooke vs. Billie Kay

Kay is from NXT and gets a jobber entrance. I really can’t imagine this is a full callup. Dana shoves her around with ease and says playtime is over. Kay gets dropped face first on the top turnbuckle before Dana chokes her in the corner. A cartwheel splash gets two but Billie gets in a discus lariat and big boot for two. Not that it matters as the Samoan Driver ends Billie at 2:53.

Sasha Banks says she’s ready for Charlotte because the Boss isn’t just a nickname. If Charlotte wants to throw Dana in her way, it’s just going to delay the inevitable. Summer Rae comes in to say she’s sick of Sasha so a match is made for tonight.

It’s time for MizTV with guest Dean Ambrose, who comes out with a paper bag in his hand. Miz yells at him for coming out early as Dean pulls out a sandwich for a snack while talking about Maroon Five: Battleground. Miz tries to correct him while Dean sucks up to the crowd. Dean plugs Battleground and talks about his own talk show. Miz doesn’t think much of the Ambrose Asylum because it just had a stupid plant.

That’s not cool with Dean and the fans get in an argument over which show is better. That turns into which title is better and Miz brings up Stephanie hating Ambrose as champ. A fight is teased so Miz takes off his jacket, which Dean uses to wipe his mouth. Maryse offers a distraction and Miz decks Dean before leaving. That’s your main event I’m sure. Dean keeps chewing despite holding his head.

Erick Rowan/Braun Strowman vs. Aaron Hale/Mike Dewotty

Rowan hammers both of them in the head to start before it’s off to Strowman, who slams Aaron onto Mike for the double pin at 55 seconds.

Post match New Day comes up on screen ala the Wyatts to ask what Bray fears. Big E. thinks it’s either soap or the ghost from Conjuring 2. Woods doesn’t have much to say as Big E. thinks Bray may be afraid of being exposed. Bray notices that Woods isn’t laughing so he should tell his friends what he already knows. The devil calls for Woods so it’s time to pray. Or maybe run.

Sasha Banks vs. Summer Rae

Post Wrestlemania Raw rematch, which somehow was Sasha’s last singles match on the two main shows. Sasha wristdrags her off the top to start but gets sidestepped out to the floor. A big boot knocks Sasha off the apron and we take a break. Back with Summer yelling a lot which is better than her wrestling a lot. Some rollups get a series of near falls for Sasha and it’s time for the clotheslines because that’s what faces in WWE do. Summer avoids the double knees in the corner and kicks Sasha in the head for two, only to be sent into the middle turnbuckle, setting up the double knees. The Bank Statement ends Summer at 8:52.

Rating: C-. This was a bit better than I was expecting though Summer has probably peaked as Fandango’s dance partner. She’s good as a jobber, though you could argue that more than half of the women in WWE are jobbers to the handful of bigger names. Summer using her legs for most of her offense makes sense too so this was almost a nice little surprise.

We look at Monday’s matches with AJ Styles and John Cena failing to get into the pay per view title match.

Dean Ambrose vs. The Miz

Non-title and Miz comes out second for some reason. Dean hammers away to start as Mauro says Dean is the man with the championship. So Miz is Dean? Miz buries a knee to the ribs to take over but Dean comes back with a cross body and right hands to the head. Maryse pulls Miz out of the way of a suicide dive but Miz saves himself from the top rope elbow. See? He can be self sufficient too.

Neither finisher can hit but Dean clotheslines him on the floor and gets in more right hands. Dean is sent into the barricade and we take a break, coming back to see Miz working on the leg. It’s off to a basic leglock but Miz takes too long going up, only to break up a superplex attempt and hit the top rope ax handle. A neckbreaker gives Dean a breather and comes back with his basic comeback package, including La Majistral for two. You wouldn’t expect lucha rollups when you look at Dean.

Dean’s middle rope dropkick is countered into the Figure Four. Ambrose gets over to the ropes and knocks Miz to the floor for a suicide dive. So much for the selling, just like Monday. The Rebound Lariat is countered into the Skull Crushing Finale for two. Miz is frustrated so he makes the mistake of trying another ax handle, only to have Dean step aside and grab Dirty Deeds for the pin at 14:35.

Rating: B. Now this was the nice surprise I was waiting for earlier. Miz losing here isn’t exactly my favorite idea but at least it was to a bigger star. It really does say something about WWE when I couldn’t think of anyone else to take this loss. We’ve seen Ambrose vs. Owens and Del Rio and Jericho so many times that it means nothing so somehow Miz is the last remaining option.

Overall Rating: D+. I don’t remember the last time I saw a show that was so thrown together. This felt like they took whoever they could find and put them into a card five minutes before the tapings started. Look back at this show and tell me if you see a TV episode or most of a pretty bad house show. It looked like they had something unique going at the start but that was all done after about thirty minutes. The main event was fine but the rest of the show felt slapped together, thereby continuing the tradition of Smackdown to its final shows on Thursday.

Results

Cesaro b. Alberto Del Rio, Apollo Crews and Sheamus – Sharpshooter to Del Rio

Rusev b. Cesaro – Accolade

Dana Brooke b. Billie Kay – Samoan Driver

Erick Rowan/Braun Strowman b. Aaron Hale/Mike Dewotty – Strowman slammed Hale onto Dewotty

Sasha Banks b. Summer Rae – Bank Statement

Dean Ambrose b. The Miz – Dirty Deeds

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01FWZZ2UA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

I really don’t like this thing.

http://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-matt-and-jeff/

NXT
Date: June 29, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves

We’re back to one of the things NXT does best as there’s a major match in a few weeks and a few things in between to tide us over. Tonight we have Carmella vs. Alexa Bliss, which has the potential to be something interesting and then be a bigger match down the line. The tag division is heating up again as well so let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Carmella vs. Alexa Bliss

Bliss takes over early on with a running shoulder but Carmella snaps off a headscissors. A bad looking snapmare puts Bliss on the floor and the fans aren’t sure who to cheer for. Back in and Carmella takes her down with a headlock, only to get stomped on as we take a break.

We come back with Carmella fighting back with right hands and running clotheslines, followed by a superkick. The Bronco Buster connects but Alexa rolls out with a sunset flip for another near fall. They’re not exactly lighting up the offense here. The Sparkle Splash is broken up and a Stratusphere gets two. A choke shovedown sets up the Sparkle Splash, now called Twisted Bliss, for the pin on Carmella at 13:08.

Rating: C. You really can see the line between the two levels of female wrestlers in NXT. Bayley, Asuka and Nia (to a lesser degree) are just on a different plain than these women, though the important thing is that these two have gotten better. The match was fine and they didn’t screw up, but more importantly they have characters and there’s a lot more to them than their looks. In other words, they’re developing, like they’re supposed to.

We see Finn Balor and Shinsuke Nakamura’s initial segment from two weeks back.

Nakamura talks about traveling the roads with Balor and being very happy for him becoming an NXT star. But now Nakamura is here and he needs something to move him up to the next level. Before becoming a champion, he has to face the icons, including Finn Balor. He promises something special when they get in the ring. Nakamura’s English was fine here

Bayley is ready to go after the Women’s Title again but Alexa comes in and says she should get the next shot. If Bayley wants the shot, she can go through Alexa.

Noah Potjes vs. Andrade Cien Almas

Potjes is a somewhat creepy guy who we’ve seen before. Almas hits a quick dropkick to start and teases a pair of dives but stays in the ring both times, kind of annoying the crowd. Back in and Noah kicks him in the ribs and puts on a chinlock. Almas gets in some kicks of his own though and the running knees in the corner give him the pin at 2:54. Still not much to see here.

Austin Aries doesn’t like the idea that he isn’t getting the respect he deserves around here. Someone like No Way Jose comes out here without ever having beaten anyone, dances a bit, and gets cheered. The fans chant Austin sucks? No, because they suck. From now on, the fans are getting what they deserve from Aries.

Balor talks about going to Japan when he was twenty four and Nakamura was the first person to really show him how things went over there. They’re friends outside the ring and Balor was happy to help show him the way in this country. There’s no animosity between them but now they’re having to face each other. The fans are in for something special.

Bayley vs. Bliss is set for next week.

Tommaso Ciampa/Johnny Gargano vs. Hype Bros

Rawley sends Gargano into the corner to start and hits a three point stance tackle before bringing in Ryder, who eats a dropkick. Ciampa comes in, drawing a PSYCHO KILLER chant, and grabs a cravate. Johnny sends Ryder to the floor and hits a big old dive, only to have Rawley get in a hard clothesline as we take a break.

We come back with Rawley in control as we have dueling JOHNNY WRESTLING/HE AIN’T HYPED chants. Ryder adds a missile dropkick but Gargano breaks up the Hype Ryder. Tommaso gives Ryder a discus lariat for two but Ryder powerbombs both of them off the top. The Elbro gets two on Ciampa and Gargano’s rollup gets the same on Ryder. Ciampa breaks up the Broski Boot and the running knee/kick to the head combo puts Ryder away at 11:17.

Rating: B. Well that was a surprise. Who knew the Hype Bros had something like that in them? Just having them as a basic power/speed team is a fine idea and I could easily see them as gatekeepers for the Tag Team Titles. Gargano and Ciampa get better every single week and I could really go for a match between the two of them and Revival.

Post match Gargano and Ciampa say they beat the Revival a few weeks back. That sounds like they deserve a title shot but here’s American Alpha to disagree. Gable says they’re the former champions so if Gargano and Ciampa want a shot, it can be against them. They’ll deal with the Authors of Pain later but right now it’s time to take the titles back.

Cue the Revival to say they’re driving the car and calling the shots. I love how Dawson holds the folded up belt in his hand. Dawson tells “Garganzalla and Chimpy” that they haven’t earned a shot and American Alpha are more like the betas around here. This brings out William Regal and you can feel the fans smiling. Ciampa and Gargano will be getting a title shot soon, but first of all we need to decide who the best team is around here. Therefore, next week, it’s American Alpha vs. Revival in a 2/3 falls match.

Gargano/Ciampa and Alpha shake hands and the former leave but the Authors of Pain run in to beat down Alpha. Gargano and Ciampa try to make the save but get beaten down as well, leaving Alpha to come back in. Jordan gets in a suplex but the other guy takes his head off with a clothesline. Gable takes that clothesline/Russian legsweep combo (sweet goodness that’s underwhelming for two guys that big) and Paul Ellering comes out to watch to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. The last twenty minutes, or nearly forty percent, of this show was about the tag team division and I’m more interested in that 2/3 falls match than I was for anything at the last Takeover. Above all else, the reason I love NXT so much is how they can take a story so basic (former champions want a rematch, other team that beat the champions want a shot, third team is running around attacking people) and turn it into such compelling TV.

On top of that though, the matches have been excellent with the Hype Bros getting in a good performance tonight. The rest of the show was strong as well but I was totally into that last match and the following segment. As is always the case, NXT is able to build up anything to such high levels. Bayley vs. Sasha was the top story for a long time, then it was back to the NXT Title and now it’s the Tag Team Titles with Balor vs. Nakamura coming just a week after that. NXT is starting to find its groove again and that’s a great thing.

Results

Alexa Bliss b. Carmella – Twisted Bliss

Andrade Cien Almas b. Noah Potjes – Running knees in the corner

Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa b. Hype Bros – Running knee/superkick combo to Ryder

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01FWZZ2UA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Nitro #276
Date: February 5, 2001
Location: Bankcorpsouth Center, Tupelo, Mississippi
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone

Things are starting to build up towards SuperBrawl and the unbelievably fresh MEGA SHOWDOWN between Scott Steiner and Kevin Nash because that’s what’s going to get the young’uns talking about WCW as they walk through the airport. If nothing else maybe we can go a full week without Animal squashing two cruiserweights for the sake of…..what was the point of that again? If pushing Animal is their idea of drawing money, close the doors now. Let’s get to it.

On a side note: I’ve been doing this series for about five and a half years, have a month and a half to go and NOW they’re being put on the Network? Hopefully they at least get the rest of them up before I wrap this show.

We actually open with Flair and Animal in the ring, yelling at Nash in the aisle. They insult each other and Flair tells Nash to come say that to his face. Animal comes to meet Nash in the aisle and is quickly beaten down, leaving Flair all alone to take a big boot. As luck would have it, the rest of the troops arrive in the back with Mike Sanders telling them what’s going on.

Nash keeps beating on Flair and starts ripping his clothes off because that’s what you do to a man in his 50s. Flair’s pants are ripped off, revealing University of Florida underwear. Nash takes down the straps and loads up the Jackknife as the troops come out. They back off due to the threat of Nash breaking Ric’s neck but Nash says he has a negotiator with….the Cat.

Nash cranks on Ric’s neck as Cat says he’s running the show tonight. Ric makes some weird noises which translate to Cat being in charge here. First up, Steiner will be fighting four cruiserweights in one match tonight. Once he gets done with that, he can fight Diamond Dallas Page. If THAT’S not enough, Steiner can defend the title against Kevin Nash and a mystery partner. If Nash wins, Flair has to resign at midnight tonight. Got all that?

After a break, Flair is still leaving the ring.

Scott Steiner vs. Jung Dragons/Noble and Karagias

The beating is on quickly as Steiner is in street clothes. Yang dares to break up the push-ups with a springboard Fameasser and all four combined finally get in some offense on the champ. Steiner kicks out of a four man cover and it’s time for the suplexes. Everyone is out so Steiner puts three of them on top of each other for a triple Recliner for the win.

Rating: F. If this is the new direction for the cruiserweights, they might as well bring back Oklahoma and Madusa to fight over the title instead. If nothing else it might be a bit less embarrassing and one sided than going through this kind of a mess again. Steiner just beat up four people, one of them a former Cruiserweight Champion, in three minutes. Those are four of the people who worked hard and put their bodies on the line at Starrcade in a ladder match and this is their reward about six weeks later. Why would those people want to stick around at this point if this is as good as it gets for them?

Flair rants about what happened tonight.

The good guys are ready and Cat gives Brian Adams a match with Buff tonight.

Rick Steiner is ready to win the US Title. Wasn’t the rule that Flair couldn’t know about it?

Gene asks Adams about Animal hitting Brian Clark in the head with a chair last week on Nitro, which now apparently has blue ring skirts that say Thunder and has replays with a THUNDER graphic in the corner. Anyway the point is Kronik is tough.

Buff is WAY too fine with this match and Flair is all happy. Totally Buff vs. Kronik is made for SuperBrawl because let’s have them go four times in about six weeks.

US Title: Rick Steiner vs. Shane Douglas

Shane is defending and has a big cast on his hand. A few shots to the head and back have Rick in trouble but the referee takes a chair away from the champ. Rick pops back up and sends Shane outside for a ram into the announcers’ table but Douglas gets in a shot on the way back in.

The reverse Hennig necksnap has Rick in trouble for all of five seconds before he starts coming back with the usual. The Steiner Bulldog is knocked out of the air with a cast shot, only to have Rick suplex him a few more times. Shane might as well just quit now as Steiner clearly isn’t going to sell a thing for him. The Steiner Driver gives us a new champ in a clean pin.

Rating: D-. Sure why not. I mean you’re pushing Scott to the moon so why not give his less talented brother the midcard title? This was basically wiping Shane out as Steiner took everything he had and just shrugged it off, as he does to everyone else around here. Bad match of course, but then again when is the last time Rick had a good one?

Steiner does his catchphrases post match.

Flair tells Chavo Guerrero Jr. that he has a special opponent for him from Mexico.

Here’s Dustin Rhodes to say Ric Flair will never forget his name. Ric comes up on screen and says Dustin is fired, meaning his mic is cut and we abruptly go to a commercial.

Scott Steiner vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Non-title. They start fast with Steiner hammering away but running into a swinging Rock Bottom for two. The fight heads outside as the announcers talk about how Page’s mission is to hit a Diamond Cutter. Not beat Steiner or any nonsense like that, but just hit his finisher to soften Steiner up for Nash. You know, our real hero.

Steiner takes over and puts Page in the Tree of Woe for the upside down choke, followed by a suplex. We hit the elbow into the push-ups but Steiner spends too much time posing, allowing Page to come back with right hands. The spinning belly to belly gets two so Steiner shoves the referee. Page gets in a Diamond Cutter out of nowhere as the referee calls for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The time really hurt this one but I could picture these two having a strong match if they were allowed to actually go somewhere. Page doing his big comebacks against the monster Steiner has potential though I really can’t imagine Page pulling it off. The formula would be similar to the famous Goldberg match though and that works just fine.

Page leaves through the crowd but he gets beaten down by Jeff Jarrett and a returning Kanyon.

Back from a break and Page can barely walk.

Jarrett and Kanyon run off in a limo.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. El Nino

Non-title and Nino is a pretty small guy under a mask. Chavo quickly takes him down to start as the announcers point out how few Mexican cruiserweights are left. Chavo runs him over and gets two off a suplex to start. A springboard cross body is countered into a backbreaker for two before Chavo starts firing off chops. Nina sends him to the floor for a nice plancha but stops for a lap around the ring.

The delay lets Chavo suplex him on the floor but Nino snaps off a top rope hurricanrana. Chavo takes him down again and puts on a chinlock as the announcers finally start paying attention again. Nino snaps off a headscissors but takes an ax handle to the back. Back up and Nino does the 619 around the ropes, followed by a sitout bulldog. The springboard seated senton gives Nino the big upset.

Rating: C+. I’m not really sure what the point was in having Mysterio (they weren’t exactly hiding it) win here, or why Flair would give him this match in the first place but it’s not like Chavo is a champion who shouldn’t be losing here or anything. The match was fine and I’m looking forward to seeing what they can do with some more time, though I’m not wild on having them fight this close to the pay per view.

Of course it’s Rey Mysterio.

Lance Storm/Mike Awesome vs. Chuck Palumbo/Sean O’Haire

Non-title. Before the match, Storm promises to become the first Canadian Commissioner at SuperBrawl. Awesome and O’Haire get things going for a chop off until Awesome throws him down with a German suplex. O’Haire rolls to the floor so Mike takes him down with a plancha over the top. In the meantime, Storm missile dropkicks Palumbo down as I’m not sure who I’m supposed to be cheering for as the Canadians are definitely wrestling like good guys.

Back in and O’Haire blasts Storm with a clothesline before Palumbo gets two off a powerslam. Awesome gets drawn in so the champs can stomp Storm in the corner. Not that it matters as Storm hits a leg lariat and makes the tag, only to have Awesome get caught in a hot shot.

Not that it matters as Awesome comes back with a slam on Sean to set up the Awesome Splash with Palumbo making the save. Everything breaks down and it’s time to fire off some big kicks. Storm gets poked in the eye and grabs the Mapleleaf on Awesome by mistake. He eventually realizes what’s going on but gets sent outside, setting up the Jungle Kick into the Seanton Bomb for the pin.

Rating: B-. If he had even the slightest bit of charisma, Storm could have been money as a face. Awesome on the other hand could have been amazing no matter what role you put him in, save for a fat chick thriller or That 70s Guy. There aren’t many names above Awesome on the “What if” list in WCW and it’s a shame that he never did anything in WWE either.

Jindrak and Stasiak think that was luck.

Buff Bagwell vs. Brian Adams

There’s no bell as Adams superkicks Buff in a surprising bit of offense. The gorilla press and a clothesline put Bagwell on the floor as the announcers hype up a No Substitution match at SuperBrawl, which is apparently going to lead to a handicap match because Clark is out with an injury. Back in and Buff scores with a dropkick before we hit the chinlock less than three minutes in.

Another chinlock keeps things slow, which is probably best given Buff’s questionable motivation from week to week. Back up and a double clothesline lets them lay around even more. You know, in case two chinlocks didn’t cover their resting quota. Cue Luger but Clark comes out to intercept him. Buff gets two off a double arm DDT until Animal decks Clark from behind. Adams comes back with a full nelson slam but the bell rings…..for a time limit draw…..at 5:44.

Rating: F. For five minutes and forty four seconds. Fine enough if WCW just has to have TV time limits back (as if any WCW TV match ever comes close to ten minutes at this point) but how in the world do you get it THAT wrong? I can understand even up to like two minutes but this felt more like a five minute time limit where they forgot to cut the time. I know WCW thinks its fans are the stupidest people on the planet but I think they can tell time. The match was what you would expect from Bagwell vs. Adams anyway so the time was hardly the only problem here.

Adams gets racked post match.

Flair tells Scott Steiner that there’s no interference in the match tonight. Steiner doesn’t care and goes to the ring. I’m glad Flair’s neck is fine after nearly having it broken an hour and a half ago.

Adams says these attacks just make Kronik stronger. He wants Luger on Thunder.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Kevin Nash/???

Steiner is defending and the mystery partner is…..Rick Steiner because Kevin Nash is a stupid man. I’m assuming Nash gets the title if Rick pins Scott. Rick suplexes him into a right hand from Nash and it’s time to go outside. Scott sends Rick into the crowd but gets pulled back in by Nash. The champ begs away until he can hit Nash low and spit at his brother. A backbreaker gets two on Nash but Rick forearms Scott in the back, knocking him into a side slam. Snake Eyes and a big boot set up the Jackknife but Rick comes in and turns on Nash because of course. Scott pins Nash to retain.

Rating: D. You knew it was coming because, again, WCW thinks its fans are going to fall for the same stuff time after time. I know I’ve said it before but here it is again: no one cares about Rick Steiner, who somehow got to work twice tonight and picked up the US Title in the process. If nothing else though, I’m scared of who will be the next face to help fight Flair and company, though I’m sure it’s likely to be Dustin or Dusty because COWBOYS ARE AWESOME.

The Steiners go to celebrate as Nash says he’s got some more left. Cue Page with a chair to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There was some good wrestling in the middle but having four Steiner matches in a night is a bit too much for me. They’re making Scott look like a monster but can anyone explain to me why the cruiserweights had to get squashed? You can’t throw the Mamalukes, as in the designated jobbers of the tag division, out there to get beaten up? It’s not like they’re doing anything else or putting on awesome matches when they’re in the ring like the cruiserweights are doing.

I’ll give them this though: there’s a goal in mind here with getting Scott over as a monster. While it may not be the best story long term, at least it’s something and could build up to a big moment when someone takes the title off of him. That’s a lot better than proving Vince Russo’s MANLINESS or having Sting turn heel despite not really being a heel or whatever else was going on a year or so ago. Now if they can get rid of Rick Steiner and actually have Scott as the top heel instead of sharing the spot with Flair we might get to a more interesting story, but this is a good enough step.

Unfortunately it’s not a great show because as usual WCW has no idea how to cut back on the focusing so much on the same story. The stable war thing is getting annoying as WCW has done it so many times but the bigger problem is how they keep hammering that story home. It’s by far the biggest thing going on here and if you don’t like that, don’t bother watching. That’s a WCW/Bischoff trope and it has never worked for me, much like it doesn’t here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01FWZZ2UA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 28, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

Things are getting interesting around here as there are only two more weeks until Smackdown moves to Tuesday nights, leaving Impact with an hour against a live WWE show with top names appearing every week. There has been no word on a time slot change or any major plans for what TNA might to do counteract this but I wouldn’t like their chances going head to head. Maybe we can get more Matt vs. Jeff out of this. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at last week’s major events.

Mike Bennett and Maria are in the ring to open things up. Maria gloats that Dixie Carter is gone this week so she’s running the show. This brings us to the new X-Division Champion with Bennett saying he has a golden ticket. In two weeks, he gets to prove that he’s the best X-Division Champion of all time. Cue Lashley to say Bennett is half the man that he is and doesn’t want to go here. Bennett cuts a really good promo about how it doesn’t matter who he’s facing because he’s taking the title.

This brings out Ethan Carter III to say he’s ready to go tonight and thinks Bennett got where he is by sucking up to a rock star. A fight is ready to break out until Billy Corgan comes out to say he’s an icon elsewhere but he’s here to be a fair judicial observer. Carter says there’s an infinite amount of sadness (Smashing Pumpkins album) in this situation so Corgan makes an X-Division battle royal for tonight with the winner facing Bennett for the title later tonight. The brawl is on but Drew Galloway comes out for the save, only to hit the Claymore on Carter by mistake.

I really hate Destination X. The X Title isn’t mentioned by any main eventer all year and gets no time. Then some main eventer goes and wins it without much effort, uses it at the show and then drops the title back into obscurity for another eleven months. I don’t even consider this exposure for the title and the division because it really does come off like the main eventers are slumming with the belt and could take it anytime. How does that strengthen the division or the title?

Drew and Ethan argue over whether or not that kick was intentional.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Sienna

Sienna is defending and Allie says it’s time to force Gail into retirement. Gail ducks a charge to start and gets two off a clothesline out of the corner. Sienna uses a Samoan Drop to break up a crucifix attempt and we hit the chinlock. Cue Jade to go after Allie but Jade comes out with her baton to knock Jade out. Sienna hits a Pounce (the Silencer) to retain at 3:15.

Rating: D. This was your weekly Gail Kim praise period as most of the match was about how awesome she is for going into the Hall of Fame. Kurt Angle wasn’t praised this much and it’s getting a little annoying to hear every single week. I’m sure she’ll get the belt back at Bound For Glory in the big feel good moment because she’s a pioneer (who is still here) and we can’t let the division go on without her.

Matt is wheeled in (in a chair with wheels as he calls it) and says, in what sounds like a thicker accent, that he’s broken but the war with Brother Nero will never end. I’m sure it won’t, but that won’t stop TNA from billing every match as the biggest one yet and possibly the last every single time.

Bennett and Galloway run into each other in the back with Mike saying he can beat the entire X-Division one after another. Drew says be careful what you say because those guys are great. They compare who has beaten who with Drew saying he’s actually won the World Title.

It’s time for Fact of Life with Eli Drake with Eli popping up from behind his podium. Drake: “When I say dummy, you say yeah. Dummy!” Crowd: “YEAH!” Drake: “I wasn’t talking to you!” He talks about going home for a dinner with his father and some friends. Apparently the Drakes are famous for their mashed potatoes and the beatings they give people and Eli does them both better than anyone.

Tonight’s guest is James Storm, who actually walks to the ring for once. Storm calls him Eli Dork and starts an ELI DRAKE DUMMY chant. Drake hits the button a lot so Storm says let’s make it a drinking game. That’s fine with Drake who pulls out a jug of water, earning himself a round of boos. Drake: “You’re gonna boo WATER?” This is the greatest talk show host ever and Drake wants to know where Storm’s title is.

Storm thinks we should change this game to him slapping Drake every time he hits the button. That’s enough for Drake who cuts the interview short and tells Storm to take his stupid beer with him. Drake wraps it up and eats the Last Call. This went a bit long but Drake was great as usual and Storm as a challenger is fine.

Jeff Hardy will meet his brother in the ring tonight face to face. They can’t go a single week without these two doing something???

We get a graphic labeled “earlier tonight” of a beatdown from last week with Decay destroying Bram.

Rosemary sits on Bram’s lap and says everyone comes to decay eventually so just let it happen.

Here’s Matt in his wheelchair with Reby pushing him around. He wants to be wheeled around the ring so he can look into the eyes of everyone that has put him in this place. The fans want Jeff so Matt yells about how he’s been broken all over this place. He wants Jeff out here to look him in the face and that’s exactly what he gets after a break. Matt says he wants this to be over but promises to never stop pursuing Jeff until he gets what he needs, which is one win.

Give him six weeks and he’ll be ready for their final battle. Matt wants to raise the stakes and make it for the Hardy name. Didn’t we do this one already? Reby freaks out for no apparent reason so Jeff tells her to get on her broom and fly away. More screeching ensues so Matt jumps out of the chair and destroys Jeff, because selling injuries off a big cage match isn’t a thing around here. Matt hits him with a chair and wraps it around Jeff’s neck for a Twist of Hate. The final match is in one week…..at Matt’s house. Matt keeps saying it will be the final deletion.

Battle Royal

Eddie Edwards, Braxton Sutter, Trevor Lee, Rockstar Spud, Andrew Everett, DJZ, Mandrews

The winner gets a title shot tonight with Mike Bennett and Maria on commentary. Only Edwards gets an entrance so it’s kind of hard to tell who all is in this. Spud is eliminated early and Mandrews eats a forearm from Lee, allowing Everett to put him out. Eddie hurricanranas Lee and Everett at the same time as Bennett lists off some luchadors that trained him, such as El Flippy.

DJZ is sent out and we’re down to four with Sutter, Everett, Edwards and Lee. Everett and Edwards wind up on the apron as Bennett gets off commentary. Bennett grabs Eddie’s foot so Lee can knock him out. We get some heel miscommunication and Sutter knocks both of them out for the title shot at 4:55.

Rating: D. I’ve never been a fan of these nothing battle royals with almost no one involved as they make the division look so worthless. This was a bunch of people who are lucky to get a match every few weeks with a guy who has had all of three matches in the company getting the win. Have a regular match or something but find a way to make them more entertaining.

Post match the Helms Dynasty beats Sutter down and Bennett is ready to go.

X-Division Title: Mike Bennett vs. Braxton Sutter

Bennett is defending and walks around for about a minute to start. A small package gives Braxton two but the Miracle in Progress retains Bennett’s title at 1:12.

Grado and Mahabali Shera have a third man to face Al Snow and Tribunal. It’s like that match in 1996 where people are wondering who the third man is.

Al Snow/Tribunal vs. Mahabali Shera/Grado/???

Can anyone tell me why the Tribunal is two people and Al Snow is a separate entity? Grado and Shera get jumped before the third man comes out and it’s…..Tyrus. Eh I’ve heard of worse ideas. Shera slams Baraka to start before it’s off to Snow, with the whistle, to pound on Grado. The beating doesn’t last long as Tyrus comes in to clean house. Baraka dives at him and gets caught in a World’s Strongest Slam for the pin at 2:57. The Tribunal had some promise at first and now they’re about where I expected them to wind up.

Bennett says that was a ten star match and he’s cashing in next week before anything else can happen.

TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. Drew Galloway vs. Lashley

Lashley is defending. We start after a break because adding another four minutes to the match time tonight is out of the question. Lashley tells them both to bring it to start but Drew and Ethan get in an argument after taking him down. It breaks down into your regular triple threat with Lashley cleaning house until the challengers start double teaming him.

A double suplex is almost broken up through pure power so they just throw Lashley down instead. Lashley is knocked outside so the other two can chop it out with Carter getting the better of it. The 1%er is countered into the Future Shock but Lashley runs in for the save at two. A spinebuster gets two on Galloway but Ethan can’t hit the TK3 on the champ. The Claymore hits Ethan by mistake, setting up back to back spears to retain Lashley’s title at 9:03.

Rating: C+. I’m so glad they gave this the time it deserved after all the build it received in that whole week they gave it to set up. The match was entertaining enough while it lasted, but those last three words are the key. They didn’t even get ten minutes for a major title match like this and for what? So Al Snow could have a few minutes in the ring? Really? I’m curious to see where they’re going with Lashley now, other than presumably Bennett and then the likely showdown with Jeff Hardy.

Overall Rating: D. This was TNA in a nutshell: less than twenty two minutes of wrestling in two hours, ANOTHER Matt vs. Jeff match was made, the X-Division was patted on the head and told “aw you’re cute, now let the big boys have your title” and Al Snow gets a match because there was no one else around to give that character to. Oh and let’s praise Gail Kim because we haven’t this week.

I couldn’t stand this show and it’s going to get even better when they have Dixie Carter come back to talk about how serious everything is next week. There’s some good stuff around here but there are SO many problems dragging the rest of the show down and next week it’s back to Hardyville for whatever Matt’s latest genius idea will be.

Results

Sienna b. Gail Kim – Silencer

Braxton Sutter won a battle royal last eliminating Andrew Everett and Trevor Lee

Mike Bennett b. Braxton Sutter – Miracle in Progress

Grado/Mahabali Shera/Tyrus b. Al Snow/Tribunal – World’s Strongest Slam to Baraka

Lashley b. Drew Galloway and Ethan Carter III – Spear to Carter

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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