NXT – March 9, 2016: The NXT Marathon

NXT
Date: March 9, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves

It’s a special show tonight as we’re back at Full Sail but also getting to find out who will be facing Finn Balor in Dallas for the NXT Title at Takeover. Sami Zayn and Samoa Joe both won a triple threat match but then drew in a singles match. Therefore tonight it’s a 2/3 falls match, though the result may have been spoiled with Sami appearing on Raw earlier this week. Let’s get to it.

Quick video on Joe vs. Zayn.

Opening sequence.

Here’s William Regal to get things going with a quick announcement: since Baron Corbin attacked Austin Aries last week, the two of them will be facing off at Takeover: Dallas. Simple and to the point again. He wraps it up by saying we’ll be getting a conclusive #1 contender tonight.

Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn

2/3 falls and we get big match intros. Joe teases a kick to the head to start before taking him down into an armbar. Sami reverses into a wristlock and rollup for two but Joe drives him into the corner. The referee actually stops to lecture them about wanting a clean break which suggests that they have a lot of time to work with here. Joe takes him back down with a hard headlock as the announcers actually keep up with the time frame by saying Joe had Monday off while Sami was on Raw.

The headlock eats up a lot of time until Sami reverses and armdrags Joe into an armbar. La Majistral gets two for Sami but Joe lights up his chest with a chop. Another armdrag sends Joe to the floor but he’s still smart enough to be out of the way before Sami can launch the dive. We take a break and come back with Joe kicking at Sami’s chest to take over. Joe grabs an arm trap chinlock for a bit, followed by a running boot to the face in the corner. The fans start to get behind Sami as we’re treated to his amazing selling.

Sami gets in a kick to the chest but charges into a belly to belly. More hard forearms to the head have Sami in trouble until he comes back with a hard clothesline in a rare power display. Joe’s corner enziguri gets two and a backsplash is good for the same. Sami can’t get a Koji Clutch so Joe plants him with a powerslam for two. Another break gets us past the twenty minute mark and we come back to see Joe hammering him down in the corner again.

Joe takes out the legs but gets sent to the floor, allowing Sami to get in a slingshot moonsault for the first really big spot. Back in and a high cross body gives Sami a rare near fall, only to have Joe turn him inside out with a clothesline. The corner Rock Bottom sets up the MuscleBuster to give Joe the first fall at 27:56.

We take another break and come back with Sami fighting out of another MuscleBuster attempt, only to have Joe ram him into the buckle a few times. Sami dropkicks him for a breather but the referee breaks it up because Joe is busted open. The distraction lets Joe go nuts with strikes to knock Sami across the ring. We get a kickout at two with some bonus yelling so Joe puts on a chinlock. Joe misses a knee drop and gets rolled up for two.

That’s about it for Sami right now as Joe sends him outside and drives Sami into the steps for a long nine count. An STO on the floor gives Joe another nine count and now it’s time for Sami’s comeback with forearms and a suplex which takes quite a bit of muscle. Joe rolls outside for Sami’s flip dive and a quick Koji Clutch ties us up at 38:37.

We take another break and come back with Sami getting two off a Blue Thunder Bomb but both guys are spent. Joe loads up what looked like a superplex but Sami sunset bombs him down for two. With Joe heading outside for a breather, Sami brings back the dive through the ropes into a tornado DDT for a long nine count. The Helluva Kick is countered into a powerbomb into a Boston crab into a crossface into a modified Rings of Saturn. Sami gets his foot on the ropes for the break as we hit 50:00.

Joe waits for Sami to get up and starts in with the strikes, including a hard set of kicks to the head. Sami is crumpled in a ball on the mat before popping to his feet. This time it’s Sami putting Joe in the Koquina Clutch but Joe rolls over and puts his foot on the ropes for the break, just like Sami did earlier. The exploder suplex into the corner sets up the Helluva Kick but Joe steps aside and grabs the real Koquina Clutch, making Sami pass out for the win at 54:08.

Rating: A. Well that worked. Seriously what else do you want me to say? Two guys just fought for nearly an hour and it was one great stretch after another. The only minor issue was Sami being on Raw earlier in the week to spoil this a bit but I think I can live with that one. Joe needed this one as he now has a big signature win on his record and looks on fire going into Dallas where things really could go either way. Great match here and a great way to spend an evening.

Overall Rating: A+. Here’s the thing that pushed this one over the top for me: before and during the match, the announcers talked about American Alpha, Carmella and Bayley being scheduled for tonight. Once we hit about forty minutes in, they said those things would have to be rescheduled. That’s something you so rarely get in wrestling today: the announcers acting like this is real.

It wasn’t a big main event that started with a few minutes left and happened to fit perfectly into their schedule. Instead, this match went on long enough that it changed what they had planned because this wasn’t what they expected. It breaks away from the perfect structure that you’re so often stuck with on most wrestling programming and that’s very refreshing for a change.

Results

Samoa Joe b. Sami Zayn – Koquina Clutch

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Monday Nitro – October 16, 2000: Going Back Down (Under)

Monday Nitro #262
Date: October 16, 2000
Location: Rod Laver Arena, Melbourne, Australia
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray, Mark Madden

We’re still in Australia and that’s been a good thing so far. Halloween Havoc is in less than two weeks and we’ve got the main event set but the main story seems to be more about humiliating the Natural Born Thrillers at every given chance. Other than that we have Goldberg trying to recreate the Streak with the Sid Vicious formula of knocking people out and counting it as a win. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Boogie Knights vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

Disco and Wright are challenging in a rematch from last week where the Knights pinned the champions. This is different from Thunder where the champions were pinned again as Thunder resulted in a title change whereas the previous match was restarted. Before the match, Alex rambles in German and Disco says the Thrillers are barred from ringside. The champs try to get in a cheap shot from behind to start but Disco gets a quick one off a swinging neckbreaker.

Alex gets two off a powerslam as Madden wonders why Wright has no hair. Jindrak hits Disco from the apron to take over as the fans are yelling at Disco because heel vs. heel matches aren’t a good idea. Mark puts Disco on the top rope for some hard shots to the jaw and everything breaks down, meaning it’s time for a ref bump. The Seanton Bomb misses and Disco gives Mark the Chartbuster, only to have Kronik come in with High Times to Disco. Tony: “It’s the hired guns of Mark Sanders.” Wright gets beaten down as well, allowing Jindrak to retain the titles.

Rating: D. More of the same here but at least the champions didn’t get pinned again. I can live with them being laid out with a finisher because there was no count but having them pinned twice on TV in a week was a huge bullet to their credibility. The Knights are a nice team and fit together well. I’m actually digging their stuff as both of them are good in the ring when they cut out the comedy stuff.

Sanders tells Nash that they’re about to take over WCW. Nash says he’s too hung over to do anything tonight.

Goldberg arrives.

The Thrillers come in to see the Cat and Miss Jones to talk about Nash being annoyed. Cat yells at them so Sanders makes Sting vs. Nash tonight. That’s not it though as Cat makes it a lumberjack match. Boy it’s convenient that Nash just said not to book him.

Team Canada vs. Misfits in Action

Before the match, Storm talks about being sick of Australia and promises to give Rection a preview of Halloween Havoc. It’s Loco/Cajun/AWOL for the Misfits here with Rection nowhere in sight. Skipper and Loco get things going and here’s Rection through the crowd to pull Storm off the apron. So why not just have him come out with them in the first place? Security quickly ejects him as Duggan comes in to beat on Loco.

AWOL gets the tag and is immediately dropkicked in the knee so it’s back to Loco as the beating continues. Everything breaks down (of course) and the referee gets bumped (of course), allowing Cajun to dropkick Skipper through the table (of course). Gunns slides in a chair to the wrong man but Storm’s shot to Loco’s back only gets two. Instead it’s the Maple Leaf making Cajun tap a few seconds later.

Rating: D. I’m getting tired of this same match structure over and over. You’re almost guaranteed a ref bump and some interference, but above all else you’re almost guaranteed that Team Canada will beat the Misfits with Gunns screwing something up. This has been the story for months now and it stopped being interesting when it started.

Here are Shane Douglas and Torrie to insult the fans. Shane invited the Filthy Animals to come out here for a fight right now.

Shane Douglas vs. Filthy Animals

Yes a heel is in a handicap match against non-jobbers. In this case that would be Konnan/Mysterio/Tygress, meaning we’re in our third match and are already on our fourth stable. The Animals destroy Shane until he maces them for a quick DQ.

Post match Konnan gets handcuffed to the ropes while Shane piledrives (not a shoulder breaker Tony) Mysterio.

Stasiak and Palumbo are mad about getting beaten up by Goldberg so Nash tells them to drop it.

Mysterio is put in an ambulance.

Shawn Stasiak/Chuck Palumbo vs. Crowbar/Mike Awesome

Nash is on commentary. Awesome and Palumbo get things going as Nash wants the 70s music abolished. Palumbo springboard dropkicks Awesome to the floor and the fans start chanting for Mike. A Stasiak baseball slide hits Palumbo by mistake and it’s time for an argument, allowing Awesome to dive over the top to take them both down. Things settle back down to Palumbo headscissoring Crowbar down to set up a superkick out to the floor.

Crowbar hurricanranas Palumbo and drops a slingshot legdrop on Stasiak for two. It’s back to Awesome who gets crotched on top and superplexed as Nash and Madded continue to riff on the match by talking about how horrible a student Stasiak is. Stasiak hits Palumbo by mistake and an Awesome Splash is enough to pin Shawn.

Rating: D. Even when they bring someone up to help bolster the roster they can’t help but screw things up. Nash was the star here because he’s the coach with the stupid kids under his wings and as usual, the Thrillers are made to look like losers. They’re going out of their way for this stuff at the moment and I have no idea what the point of this could be. I’m sure they’re doing this to draw money or whatever because that’s all WCW was ever about.

Nash throws a chair into the ring ala Bobby Knight to make sure you know this is ALL about Nash instead of anyone else.

Douglas is proud about what he did and wants a World Title shot tonight. Torrie calls Pamela Paulshock a very bad word.

David Flair wants Buff Bagwell in a DNA match at Halloween Havoc, whatever that is. Sanders gives him the match but has a job for David tonight.

Johnny the Bull vs. Kwee Wee

Fallout from the Lava Lamp Lounge. Kwee Wee monkey flips him to start and Johnny snaps his ankle, giving Kwee Wee a pin in about twenty seconds.

Johnny is taken out on a stretcher.

Here’s the Cat with Miss Jones for a chat. Cat hates Madden (join the club) but wants to dance. They both dance but Cat says he isn’t out here to dance. Instead he wants to beat up Mike Sanders because there isn’t room for two commissioners. Sanders comes out and says he doesn’t have time tonight but he’ll beat Cat up at Halloween Havoc. Cue Kronik to go after Cat (who makes drug references) but Goldberg comes to the ring and says bring it. Sanders holds Kronik back and Kronik accuses Goldberg of believing their own hype. A lot of trash talk keeps this going for a bit but nothing happens.

WCW World Title: Shane Douglas vs. Booker T.

Scott Steiner is on commentary. I’m so glad that WCW gave this the proper fifteen minutes of build that it deserved. The bell rings and we cut to Konnan telling Tygress to wait on him because he has something to do. Stevie talks about having his money on Booker in Vegas as Booker kicks Shane in the face. Torrie trips Booker but we cut to the fans for no logical reason. Couldn’t we cut to Torrie instead?

They fight to the floor with Shane getting the better of it, followed by a top rope clothesline for two. We hit the chinlock as Steiner wants to know why Shane isn’t going after the knee. Fair point but then again Steiner is a known genius. The reverse Hennig neck snap gets two on the champ but Steiner is telling Shane to go after the knee. If the knee is already bad, wouldn’t it be better for Steiner to have two injured body parts?

Booker fights out of a neck crank with a spinebuster and Steiner is suddenly the best analyst in the company. As in he’s calling moves and explaining what Shane should be doing to stay on the injuries. Torrie puts a chain on Shane’s hand but Kidman runs out for a save. That brings Steiner out of the chair to attack Kidman so here’s Konnan to jump Steiner. Now Jarrett comes out to attack Konnan, leaving Booker to Bookend Shane to retain the title.

Rating: D+. The neck stuff was fine and Steiner was entertaining in a very different way than usual but the five people interfering continues to make you want to scream SETTLE DOWN ALREADY. I’m still not sure why Shane got a title shot in the first place other than saying he wanted one but stranger things have happened in WCW.

Post break, Midajah yells at Kidman in Spanish and Steiner wants to fight Kidman tonight.

David Flair vs. Goldberg

This is Sanders’ brilliant idea because when you think about a way to get rid of Goldberg, you think of David Flair. Before the match, here’s Ric Flair to do commentary. Goldberg doesn’t want to fight David so he shoves David away, followed by the spear and Jackhammer for the pin in about a minute.

Ric stares at Goldberg before checking on David.

Kidman says he’s as tight with the Filthy Animals as Pamela is in her top. He’s ready for Steiner tonight. Konnan doesn’t like Scott either.

Scott Steiner vs. Kidman

Before the match, Steiner does a profanity laced version of AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE before beating up a fan. Steiner throws Kidman around to start and tries a powerbomb but thankfully some things are sacred and Kidman faceplants him. That’s about it for Kidman though as Steiner gives him the super Angle Slam, followed by the Recliner to end the squash.

Preview of a profile on Goldberg airing on CNN.

Konnan vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett interrupts Konnan as he allows Tygress to feel his hat but the rolling clothesline drops Jeff to the floor. Konnan has a chair knocked out of his hands and Jeff blasts him instead, allowing them to head back inside. A faceplant drops Jeff and it’s time for a Bronco Buster until Shane Douglas comes out to grab Tygress. Torrie goes after her as well, allowing Jeff to bring in the guitar, which hits Tygress by mistake. The Stroke puts Konnan away in a hurry.

Jarrett puts Konnan in the Scorpion.

Earlier this week, Kevin Nash had his own beer made. Ok then.

Kevin Nash vs. Sting

Lumberjack match with almost everyone we’ve seen tonight and a few others around the ring. Nash, in theory still hung over, goes right for Sting to start and fires off the knees in the corner. Sting knocks him to the floor for a beating by the Misfits and it’s time to work on Nash’s knee. The Scorpion is on in a hurry but the Thrillers helps pull Nash to the ropes. Back in and the Stinger Splash is broken up with a raised boot and Nash takes over again. Snake Eyes sets up a neck crank as I wouldn’t mind if they got to the brawl instead of going through the motions like this.

Steiner and Booker get in a fight while Nash cranks on Sting’s neck as everyone fights on the floor, setting off a GOLDBERG chant. Sting fights back with a bunch of clotheslines but the referee gets bumped on a Stinger Splash attempt. Cue Jeff with a guitar to knock Sting cold though and give Nash the pin.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? Lumberjack matches almost always go this way and there’s almost no way around it. Jarrett just hitting him with the guitar for the win was probably better than having whatever other nonsense they might have gone with here. At least the hung over stuff didn’t amount to anything, which is definitely the best for everyone involved.

Nash pulls down the straps and Tony freaks out but nothing happens to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. The overbooking has brought the show back down to normal (well normal by WCW 2000 standards) and it’s still just as annoying. You had all of the screwy endings and the far too short matches because everything had to be packed in to a single show. There’s really no reason why a three hour Raw has fewer matches than a two hour episode of Nitro. On top of that, aside from the two main events, WCW has done a horrible job of setting up the pay per view. I have almost no idea what the other matches are and the limited build we’ve gotten goes nowhere. Bad show again and for all the worst reasons.

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania VII: Stars and Stripes and Randy and Elizabeth Forever

Wrestlemania VII
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Memorial Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Gorilla Monsoon

Oh boy has a lot of stuff changed here. First of all, Jesse is gone from the company and is being replaced by a revolving door of replacements. Other than that we’ve got Sgt. Slaughter as an anti-American world champion who needs a REAL AMERICAN to save the title for the country. There’s also a retirement match here between Randy Savage and Ultimate Warrior, which might actually be better than Warrior’s title win last year. Oh and there’s this big guy in black that is making his Wrestlemania debut tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Hogan saving AMERICA, which is what the entire show is about. I believe the subtitle of this show is Stars and Stripes Forever, so if you can’t figure out what the ending is going to be, I can’t help you. Keep in mind that this was inspired by the Gulf War….which was already over but who cares about technicalities like that?

Willie Nelson sings America the Beautiful.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan is dressed like a drunk Uncle Sam and comes out for commentary for the opening match since Heenan is managing. He gives his thoughts on the main matches too.

The Rockers say they’ll beat the Heenan Family.

Haku/Barbarian vs. Rockers

Shawn and Haku get us going with Michaels trying to speed things up, only to be slammed into the corner. The second attempt at flying around works a bit better as a dropkick puts Haku down. The Rockers do some of their double teaming stuff but Barbie takes them down with a big double clothesline. Shawn and Marty double superkick him down though and the Heenan Family has to regroup a bit.

We get down to Marty vs. Barbarian again and speed takes over one more time. A sunset flip doesn’t work for Jannetty but Barbarian punches the mat. A rana takes Barbarian down and Marty pounds away for two. Off to Haku and a double headbutt puts Marty down again. Jannetty loads up another rana but the foreigners hit a double hot shot onto the top rope to really take over this time.

A gorilla press plants Jannetty and it’s time for more heel double teaming. Marty comes back with something like a cross body for two but the speed continues to get beaten down. By speed I mean the drug of the day for Jannetty of course. Back to Barbarian for a bearhug followed by a powerslam so wicked that the fans pop for it. The falling headbutt misses though and it’s hot tag time to Shawn. Things really do speed up now but Shawn gets kicked in the face to slow him down. That goes nowhere for the villains though and it’s a Michaels cross body off the top for the pin on Haku.

Rating: B. Just a fast paced tag team match here with power vs. speed. This is one of those formulas that works no matter how many times you do it as long as you have talented guys in there. The future Faces of Fear were fine as monsters for the Rockers to conquer and it set a good pace for the show here. Solid opening match.

Gene is with Marla Maples (not really famous), Alex Trebek and Regis Philbin, our celebrities for tonight. Regis is scared of Earthquake, Trebek tries to make Jeopardy jokes, and Marla is still not famous. Apparently she was married to Donald Trump. Ok then.

Dino Bravo vs. Texas Tornado

Von Erich popped into the company around Summerslam, won the IC Title from Perfect, lost it and was immediately a jobber to the stars until he went back to Texas. It’s a fast brawl to start but Bravo avoids the claw. Heenan is on commentary now. Von Erich runs into a boot in the corner and Dino takes over for a bit. The side suplex puts Tornado down for two and that’s about it for Bravo. A few seconds later it’s Claw and Tornado Punch for the pin on Bravo.

Rating: D. Nothing at all to see here and it’s a match that easily could have been cut. This was Bravo’s last televised match before he left the company for good a year or so later. Afterwords he would soon be murdered in an illegal cigarette smuggling operation in Canada. Now there’s a story that you can’t make up.

Warlord and Slick are ready for Davey Boy.

Bulldog talks to Winston (his new dog) and says there’s no bull in this bulldog.

Davey Boy Smith vs. Warlord

This is about whether or not Davey can break the full nelson. We start with our standard power stuff as they ram into each other a few times, only to have Bulldog knock Warlord out to the floor. A crucifix doesn’t work for Bulldog so Warlord drops some elbows for no cover. We hit the bearhug but Bulldog punches out, only to get caught in a hot shot to keep him on the mat.

A BIG belly to belly (kind of) puts Bulldog down but again Warlord won’t cover. We hit the chinlock until Bulldog fights up and hits a dropkick to send Warlord into the corner. Punches in said corner can’t drop Warlord but a cross body is finally enough to get him off his feet. Warlord counters a piledriver but Bulldog counters the counter into a sunset flip for two. Bulldog misses a charge into the corner and Warlord hooks the full nelson. It looks like all hope is lost but the fingers aren’t locked. Bulldog finally flips out of it and hooks the powerslam out of nowhere for the win.

Rating: C+. This would be filed under the category of “shocking the world” as it was actually a pretty solid match. Bulldog would get a lot better all of a sudden while Warlord would fall further down the card than he already was. This was way better than I was expecting and it turned into a pretty decent power match.

Jimmy Hart and hits Nasty Boys are ready to take the tag titles from the Harts.

The Harts say good luck cracking the Foundation.

Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

The Nastys got got hot in WCW in 1990, weren’t signed to contracts, and debuted in the WWF in late 1990/early 1991. They won a tag team battle royal for this shot they’re getting here. Jerry and Bret start things off and it’s a quick Thesz Press to take Sags down. Brian gets knocked off the apron by the Hitman and Sags gets tripped down to the mat. No Sharpshooter yet though as Bret stomps the midsection instead.

Off to Anvil who starts powering Knobs around and pounds away in the corner. After being knocked to the floor, Brian comes right back in and is immediately caught in an armbar. The Nastys double team Neidhart in their corner to FINALLY take over, but a mat slam is enough to let Neidhart tag Bret back in. Hart tries to fight off both of the Boys, only to get decked from behind by Knobs.

Bret is sent out to the floor where he may have hurt his knee. Back inside Jerry whips him into the corner as we hit the heat section of the match. Sags hooks a reverse chinlock before Knobs comes in to do exactly the same. Back to Jerry for a neckbreaker for two and Brian breaks up a hot tag attempt. Hart breaks up a reverse chinlock by Knobs and now it’s Jerry to break up another hot tag.

Brian misses a splash in the corner and Bret makes the tag but, say it with me, the referee doesn’t see it. We get heel miscommunication and NOW we get a tag to Anvil. Jim cleans house and hits a quick powerslam for two on Knobs as everything breaks down. Jimmy Hart gets decked by Bret and there’s a Hart Attack for Knobs. The referee tries to get Bret out and Sags decks Bret with Jimmy’s helmet, giving the Nastys the titles.

Rating: B-. Another solid tag match here as the division was getting very hot all of a sudden. The Harts would quietly split up after this with Bret moving into the IC Title picture soon thereafter. The Nastys would hold the titles over the summer before dropping them to the monsters known as the LOD at Summerslam.

Jimmy Hart’s near panic attack over winning the belts is hilarious stuff.

We recap Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel. Back in October, Roberts and Martel were on the Brother Love Show where Martel tried to spray his cologne on Damien’s bag, only to hit Jake’s eyes by mistake. Jake was basically blind for a few months, leading to the following blindfold match. These have never been good in the history of wrestling and I don’t expect it to be here.

Jake says snakes always do it better in the dark.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

In short, they’re both in hoods and neither guy can see. So the match starts and both guys point across the ring while trying to find where the other is. Martel gets down on the mat and crawls around, only to give us some stupid comedy spots with both guys tripping over the other. Rick tries a backdrop but Jake runs off to the side, showing that he can clearly see if you’re thinking about this.

They miss each other in the corner a few times until Martel finally grabs him for a slam, only to miss an elbow drop. Martel gets the referee in the corner, only to realize he’s grabbing a shirt. Jake uses the crowd for help by pointing and listening to the crowd cheer as he points at Martel. This continues on for awhile until Martel nearly grabs the snake bag.

The announcers continue a running joke where they can’t hear each other which isn’t funny. Jake gets knocked to the floor so Martel follows. He grabs a chair and pokes around with it but only hits the post. Back in and Martel takes Jake down and hooks the Boston Crab, only to have it broken quickly. Roberts grabs the DDT a second later for the pin.

Rating: F. This wasn’t wrestling. It was a stupid idea with both guys wandering around and making no contact for about seven and a half minutes before both guys hit their finishers. Thankfully this feud was done after this as I don’t think the fans could stand any more of it. Oh and on top of that, Martel didn’t cheat once by looking under the mask. Nice heel work there.

The Nasty Boys celebrate in the back and disgust Marla Maples.

Jimmy Snuka vs. The Undertaker

For those of you reading this now, we’re currently at 20-0 and it all begins here. Taker slugs him around and rams Snuka head first into the corner a few times. The big jumping clothesline takes Snuka down and there’s a quick smother by Taker. Jimmy charges into a knee in the corner and gets slammed down, only for an elbow drop to miss. Snuka chops away but misses a dive and falls to the floor. The Tombstone ends this a few seconds later.

Rating: D+. The match is just a squash but it’s far more historic than anything else. Undertaker would go on to become the true Mr. Wrestlemania, never losing a single match in the entirety of his career there up to the point this is being written (2013). Snuka would fade from view soon after this.

We recap Savage vs. Warrior. Savage attacked then WWF Champion Ultimate Warrior on Saturday Night’s Main Event because he wanted a title match. Queen Sherri then got on her knees in front of Warrior at the Rumble, only to be turned down again. Savage cost Warrior the title later in the night, setting up a career ending match here tonight.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Before the match, Heenan spots Miss Elizabeth sitting in the crowd. Warrior only walks to the ring with a coat on instead of his usual sprint to the ring. His trunks have the WWF Title belt on the back with the words “Means much more than this”. The fans HATE Savage here while Warrior gets some great pops. They lock up to start with Warrior easily shoving Randy down a few times. A shoulder does nothing for Savage so he heads to the outside.

Back in and a clothesline puts Savage down and there’s an overhand choke. An atomic drop has Savage in trouble again and there’s a big atomic drop for good measure. Sherri tries to interfere and is immediately knocked to the outside again. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Warrior pounds away as this is completely one sided so far. Savage finally comes back with a clothesline but he dives off the top into a slam position, but Warrior puts him down on his feet with no slam. Now THAT is a mind game.

Macho King goes to the floor and grabs a chair which is nothing more than a distraction so that he can jump Warrior. That goes as well as anything else has for him so far with Warrior pounding away at Savage’s head. Warrior stomps away in the corner as Heenan says you couldn’t sneak a midget into the building. Savage falls out of the corner to avoid a charge, sending Warrior out to the floor. Sherri adds a slap to the face and there’s the top rope ax handle.

Warrior gets posted and Sherri gets in a few more shots for good measure. We’re told that this is the largest PPV audience in the history of pay per view. Since there’s no way to know that for months, I don’t think this is the case. Warrior absorbs some slams and pops up to stare Savage down. A Sherri distraction doesn’t work at all and Warrior runs the ropes, only to be slammed face first down into the mat for two.

We hit the chinlock/sleeper for a bit before a double clothesline puts both guys down. Sherri tries to interfere again but the referee is taken down in the process. AGAIN the Queen interferes but accidentally takes Savage out by mistake. Warrior goes after her but gets caught in a rollup for two. Heenan is panicking over this stuff. Savage clotheslines him down and hits the flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, followed by a flying elbow, which gets a two count in total. To say Savage is in shock is the understatement of the year.

Warrior starts shaking the ropes and hits the war path around the ring before clotheslining Savage half to death. The gorilla press and splash only get two and Warrior talks to his hands, asking if it’s time for him to step aside. With Warrior on the apron, Savage decks him down to the floor as the crowd continues to be on the edges of their seats.

Savage loads up the ax handle to the barricade but Warrior hits him coming down, sending Randy crashing into the barricade. Back in and Savage can barely stand so Warrior hits two tackles to send Savage out to the floor both times. A third hits and Savage is DONE. Warrior puts his foot on the chest to end Savage’s career.

Rating: A. After watching both this and Wrestlemania 6 in about three days, there is zero question as to which is the better match. This was a pair of titans colliding and one man clearly was better. That’s one of the formulas that never fails if worked even mostly right and they NAILED IT here. This is by far and away Warrior’s best match ever, but the best part is yet to come.

Post match Sherri gets in the ring and beats the tar out of Savage who is defenseless and can’t see who it is. Elizabeth shocks everyone by jumping the guardrail and throwing Sherri to the floor in the only time I can ever remember her getting physical. Savage gets up and is SHOCKED to see Liz, who hadn’t been seen in about a year. Liz says it was Sherri attacking Savage who has no idea what to do.

Liz holds out her arms and after a few moments, Savage hugs her to one of the biggest ovations you will ever hear. Savage puts Liz on his shoulder before the go to leave. As is their custom, Liz holds the ropes for him but Savage says not this time, and holds the ropes open for her. Savage gets to take a bow in the middle of the ring and the fans are thrilled. This is the only, repeat ONLY, moment in wrestling that legitimately brings a tear to my eye every time I watch it. I think that’s the case for a lot of fans.

Regis Philbin is measured for a coffin by Undertaker. Regis: “We’re dying out here.”

Demolition is with Alex Trebek who annoys them with stupid Jeopardy talk. It’s Smash and Crush at this point, managed by Mr. Fuji again.

Regis talks to Tenryu and Kitao who are here for one night only. They don’t speak English so we get some racially insensitive attempts at communication.

Jake Roberts and Damien torment Trebek a bit. This is why intermission getting cut out was a good idea.

Demolition vs. Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao

Now this is one of those out of nowhere matches. Demolition is on their very last toes of their very last legs here as they’ve even got Mr. Fuji again. Tenryu is a Japanese legend and Kitao is a big time sumo guy who became a pro and didn’t do much. Kitao and Crush start things off but everything breaks down quickly. Fuji whacks Kitao in the back and Demolition takes over again. Gorilla asks what it takes to become a grand champion of sumo. Brain: “Being able to eat 1100 bowls of rice in an hour with a single chopstick.”

Crush slams Kitao down and it’s off to Smash. Kitao finally comes out of the corner with a clothesline and it’s off to Tenryu. He speeds things up in a hurry but misses a top rope back elbow. Crush hits a backbreaker to put Tenryu down but Kitao breaks up the Decapitator. He breaks it up again and Tenryu hits a fast enziguri and powerbomb for the pin on Smash.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here and I have no idea what the point of this match was. It’s the final match for Demolition and on top of that, THIS is how you use Tenryu, a legitimate Japanese legend? The match was less than five minutes long and this is the only time I know of that Tenryu appeared for the company in a regular match for nearly two years. My guess would be this is part of the working agreement with Tenryu’s SWS.

Boss Man says Heenan and his Family has nowhere else to hide tonight.

Mr. Perfect and Heenan say about what you would expect them to say about Big Boss Man.

Intercontinental Title: Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Perfect is defending. This is an interesting yet simple idea for a story: Heenan had insulted Boss Man’s mama so Boss Man swore revenge. He went after the Heenan Family and beat every single one of them until there was only Perfect left. Tonight is the final showdown. They spit at each other to start and Perfect slaps Boss Man like a schmuck. Boss Man hits him once to knock Perfect out to the floor and there’s a spin around BY THE HAIR. FREAKING OW MAN!

Boss Man speeds around the corner and hits a big clothesline to take Hennig down. Perfect gets tossed out to the floor and Boss Man is standing tall. Back in and Boss Man hits the running crotch attack to Perfect’s back and whips him with a belt for good measure. Perfect finally avoids a shot and takes Boss Man down with some kicks to the ribs. Off to a chinlock with a knee in the back followed by an abdominal stretch. There’s the Hennig neck snap for two and Mr. goes up, only to jump into a boot.

Perfect gets to do his reverse crotching into the post but as they go to the floor, Boss Man is whipped into the steps to take him down again. Since it was a Heenan distraction that caused the whip into the steps, here’s Andre the Giant to counter the weasel. Andre picks up the belt and takes way too long to get to his position, from which he whacks Perfect in the head to knock him out cold. Boss Man covers but Haku and Barbarian run in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This wasn’t great and I have no idea why they didn’t change the title. The story set it up to be a title change, but I guess they were hoping for something else besides this. What that was I have no idea as Boss Man would never come close to the title again. The match was decent enough all things considered though.

Boss Man and Andre clean house post match.

Donald Trump, Chuck Norris, Lou Ferrigno and Henry Winkler are here. Yep, the Fonz showed up at Wrestlemania.

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Valentine turned face a few months ago and this is his big match for the forces of good. We’re 20 seconds in and Valentine is getting powerslammed down for two. A splash misses in the corner and Valentine gets him down to one knee. Quake breaks the Figure Four twice, hits a big elbow and drops the Earthquake for the pin.

Rating: F+. Earthquake was pretty much done as a singles guy at this point but I’m assuming he got some shots at Hogan on house shows over the summer. Other than that though this was a filler match that didn’t need to be on the card at all. Nothing to see here but at least Quake looked dominant.

The LOD says Power and Glory will be sour and gory after the match.

Power and Glory vs. Legion of Doom

Hercules is sent to the floor and it’s a Doomsday Device to end Roma in less than a minute. They were clearly coming for the belts very soon.

We recap Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase. Basically Virgil spent years serving DiBiase and FINALLY snapped on him at the Royal Rumble, setting up this match tonight. Roddy Piper is Virgil’s mentor here too.

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Virgil gets one of the three big pops of his entire career here, with the first being when he finally hit DiBiase with the belt. The other will be in less than ten minutes. Virgil pounds away to start and sends Ted out to the floor. Back in and Ted hits a clothesline but an elbow misses a second later. DiBiase, the wrestler, easily takes Virgil down and hits a suplex for two. Things are REALLY slow now compared to just a few moments before. We head to the floor for a bit with DiBiase shoving down Piper, who was on crutches at this point. DiBiase talks some trash so Piper pulls the top rope down but the distraction is enough for a countout.

Rating: D. This was all story but it really should have been Virgil pinning DiBiase, even on a rollup. These two would continue to feud with Virgil actually taking the Million Dollar Title at Summerslam 1991. The problem with Virgil was that after the DiBiase feud, there was nothing for him to do at all. The match was really dull and didn’t have the payoff it needed at the end.

DiBiase puts Virgil in the Million Dollar Dream post match but Piper hits him with the crutch to break it up. Queen Sherri comes out to help with a beatdown of Piper, as she is now managing DiBiase. Referees come out to break it up until Virgil makes the save. Virgil tells Piper to get up, as Piper had told him over the last few months.

We get a clip of Slaughter and General Adnan burning a Hogan t-shirt.

Slaughter threatens to get himself disqualified to keep the title. We get a clip of Slaughter beating up Hogan and Duggan as Slaughter laughs evily.

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Tito chases him around to start and beats him up a bit, only to get caught in the ribs with Mountie’s shock stick, ending this in less than 90 seconds.

Hogan gives his prematch interview, talking about how much he loves AMERICA and how he’s got new weapons. We get a clip of Slaughter and Adnan beating Hogan down but he promises to do it for his country.

Here are the celebrities: Regis is on commentary, Marla Maples is the timekeeper and Alex Trebek is ring announcer.

WWF World Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan immediately chases Slaughter around the ring until Adnan is put on the floor. Feeling out process to start with both guys going into the corner. Hulk hooks a headlock to no avail but sends Slaughter backwards with a shoulder block. The champ hits one of the weakest chair shots you’ll ever see to Hogan’s back and pokes Hulk in the eye to finally take over. Hogan comes back with a clothesline and decks Adnan for fun too. A backdrop puts Slaughter down and Hulk sends him into the post.

Hogan hits a jumping knee to the back to send Slaughter into the corner and a slingshot sends Slaughter into the buckle again. Hogan gets in his ten punches in the corner for two but goes to the middle rope of all places, but Adnan breaks it up. Slaughter gets slammed down and Hulk drops a bunch of elbows. Now Hogan goes up top (!) but gets slammed to the mat and clotheslined to the floor. A better but still lame chair shot puts Hogan down again and it’s time to work on the back.

A backbreaker gets two for the champion and he stomps away on Hulk’s back. There’s a Boston Crab but Hulk is right next to the rope, making this pretty worthless. Another backbreaker gets two and it’s a third chair shot, this time to the head, gets two more. Hulk is cut over the eye. There’s Slaughter’s Camel Clutch but Hulk fights up, only to be rammed into the corner to send him right back down. Slaughter puts an Iraqi flag on Hogan and you know what’s coming now. A Hulk Up, big boot and leg drop later and AMERICA REIGNS AGAIN!

Rating: C. At the end of the day, if you didn’t know what was going to happen here then you’re either very young or have no idea how wrestling works. On top of the story, it’s Hogan in a match against a big man. What else could you possibly expect? Hogan winning is the 100% right decision and the match certainly isn’t bad. Slaughter was clearly a short term champion and there’s nothing wrong with that either. Decent stuff here and a feel good moment to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Oddly enough, this wasn’t too bad. There’s some lame stuff but for the most part it’s very short with only Jake vs. Martel being both bad and longer than five minutes. Other than that you get a very fun opener, a masterpiece in the retirement match, a feel good main event and some other solid stuff. If you shave off about half an hour of this, which could easily be done by dropping about three matches, this show goes WAY up in value. Still though, it’s worth checking out if you haven’t seen it in a long time.

Ratings Comparison

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Original: B

Redo: B

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Original: F

Redo: D

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Original: F

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+

Redo: A

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

Original: W (For What were they thinking)

Redo: D+

Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-

Redo: C

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Original: N/A

Redo: F+

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: C-

Redo: D

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Original: C+

Redo: C

Overall Rating

Original: C

Redo: B-

These things need to be different already.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/14/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-7-wrestlemania-goes-patriotic/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania VI: The Warrior Has Won The Title

Wrestlemania VI
Date: April 1, 1990
Location: SkyDome, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 67,678
Commentators: Jesse Ventura, Gorilla Monsoon

Time for another historic main event and in this case it’s probably Hogan’s best match ever. After Hogan basically beat every heel in the company, the only thing left to do was to have someone new come into the main event. At the Royal Rumble, only Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior were left in the ring at one point. The fans erupted and we had Wrestlemania 6. That’s the only match of note on the card so let’s get to it.

The opening video is set in space with a bunch of constellations. Vince does a voiceover and talks about how the two strongest beings in the universe are Hogan and Warrior. That’s different if nothing else.

Robert Goulet sings O Canada.

Rick Martel vs. Koko B. Ware

Martel is now a model and THE RING CARTS ARE BACK!!! Rick jumps Koko to start things off and the beating is on fast. Koko comes out of the corner with a cross body for two and a dropkick to stagger Martel even more. Martel heads to the floor, only to be dragged right back in. He sends Koko to the floor though and things slow down a bit. Rick pounds away on the back and hits a middle rope shot to the back. A backbreaker looks to set up the Boston Crab but Koko makes the rope. Some rams into the corner don’t work because Koko is black you see. A middle rope cross body misses and this time the Crab ends Ware.

Rating: D+. Not much of an opener here but it was decent enough I guess. This would have been a dark match today I would guess. The interesting thing here is what you got on the clipped version. On that edition, the first Boston Crab was clipped to the ending of the second one. See how dangerous that stuff can be?

Gene is with the tag team champions Haku and Andre (the Colossal Connection), calling the Colostomy Connection. Heenan: “Well if you want to talk evacuation….” They say they’ll beat Demolition. Gene: “The Colossal Connection: they’re anything but regular guys.”

Demolition says they’re going to take out the Connection and take the titles. Ax wants to chop them down like trees while Smash wants to put them in a tractor trailer and push them over a cliff. Our heroes ladies and gentlemen!

Tag Titles: Colossal Connection vs. Demolition

Only the challengers get an entrance. Andre is old and banged up here but they gave him a token title at the end of his career. The champions, the Connection, takes over to start as it’s Haku vs. Smash to get us going. Off to Ax to pound away but Andre comes in to break it up. Smash will have none of that and the beating continues on Haku with the challengers taking turns on him.

Haku and Smash fight over a backslide for awhile until Andre breaks it up. Demolition keeps control though and Haku gets beaten on even more. Andre finally cheats enough to let the give the champions the advantage. The giant headbutts Ax from the apron for a very delayed two before Haku rams Ax’s head into Andre’s head for two more. This was during the time when Andre would be officially in for about 15 seconds which was all he was capable of anymore.

Off to the Tongan nerve hold by Haku for a bit before Andre chokes in the corner. Andre hasn’t actually been in the match yet. A shoulder breaker gets two for Haku but he misses a charge into the corner. Hot tag brings in Smash to clean house and a flying forearm gets two. Everything breaks down and Andre is taken down by a double clothesline. Haku accidentally superkicks Andre into the ropes and the Decapitator gives Demolition their third tag titles.

Rating: C-. This was decent stuff but it was basically a handicap match. Andre was just too old to do much else after this and I don’t think he ever had another match in the WWF. Demolition would go on to have a summer long reign before turning heel and losing the titles to the now face Hart Foundation. Decent stuff here and the fans loved it.

Heenan, ever the brilliant man, yells at Andre and SLAPS HIM IN THE FACE! Andre grabs him by the face and smacks him around, blocks Haku’s superkick like it’s a baby’s hand, knocks Haku into the ring cart, changes his mind and kicks Haku out of the cart and leaves to a huge ovation. This was a good way to go out for Andre as he showed he could still beat up a lot of people with ease. Good stuff.

Jimmy Hart thinks there’s going to be an earthquake in Toronto. Earthquake is ready for Hercules.

Hercules vs. Earthquake

Earthquake misses a charge into the corner to start and Hercules pounds away on him. The big man heads to the floor before coming back in for a test of strength. Hercules goes down almost immediately and Earthquake is in control. The non-disaster comes back with some clotheslines but for reasons of general stupidity, Hercules tries a torture rack which goes as well as you would expect on someone who weighs 468. Two Earthquakes end Hercules.

Rating: D. Quick and easy here as Earthquake was clearly being built up as a huge monster for either Hogan or Warrior. He could certainly move very quickly for a guy his size and he had the talking ability to back it up. Earthquake is often forgotten as a quality monster which is a shame because the guy was pretty awesome.

Some celebrity interviewer is with Liz who says she’ll be around more often in the future from now on. Not really but whatever.

Brutus Beefcake thinks Mr. Perfect’s record looks pretty good. Tonight, he’s going to make it imperfect.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

This is one of the biggest matches on the card. Beefcake starts fast and punches Perfect to the floor with a single right hand. Back in and another punch sends Perfect flying over the top rope again. Brutus pounds away some more and Perfect gets to do his over the top bumping. A running clothesline puts Perfect down and Beefcake calls for the sleeper as Mary Tyler Moore of all people is here.

Perfect’s manager the Genius (the original Damien Sandow. They both even did cartwheels) slides in his metal scroll to Perfect and a shot to the head gives Mr. control. Perfect pounds away with some slow shots to the chest but the fans are staying into this. Beefcake comes back with the required slingshot into the required head first into the post bump by Perfect which is enough for the win out of nowhere.

Rating: C-. The crowd carried this one as Beefcake wasn’t a great worker but he had more charisma than he knew what to do with. Perfect was a leading candidate to face Hogan here so he was certainly a top heel. The match wasn’t great but it was more than enough to fire the crowd up again here. Granted the crowd is already white hot so no complaints here.

Post match Brutus goes to cut Perfect’s hair but Genius steals the clippers. Beefcake chases down the worthless Genius for a sleeper and a haircut. Brutus’ SWEET music is playing the whole time on top of that.

Now it’s time for one of the weirdest matches you’ll ever see. We recap Bad News Brown vs. Roddy Piper which started with a double elimination and a brawl at the Rumble. That’s all well and good. We go to Piper in the back where Piper says some people call him Hot Rod but then he turns around to show that half of his body is painted black. That side is called Hot Scot and you can hear the racial issues building from here. Apparently it was something about Michael Jackson.

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

An interesting point here is that both guys are legit black belts in judo with Brown being an Olympic bronze medalist in the sport. They immediately take it to the mat in a fist fight until Piper gets two off a cross body of all things. The referee (former heel wrestler Danny Davis) keeps separating them so Brown takes over by sending Piper’s head into the buckle. He yells at Piper for trying to be black and it’s off to a nerve hold.

Brown slugs him down a few times and drops an elbow for two. Somewhere in there a buckle pad is ripped off and it’s Brown going chest first into said buckle. Piper pulls out a single white glove (Brown wore a single black one) and a bunch of punches send Brown to the floor. Piper swings a chair but hits the post and it’s a double countout.

Rating: D. Instead of a brawl or something entertaining, this was much more of a bizarre spectacle than anything else. Brown would be gone soon after this while Piper would shift into the broadcast booth to take over for Jesse. The fight was a lot weaker because of how much stuff there was to distract from the action which is never a good thing.

Steve Allen, former host of the Tonight Show, is playing a piano in the bathroom as the Bolsheviks rehearse the Russian national anthem. Jokes are made and they’re not that funny.

Hart Foundation vs. Bolsheviks

National anthem, Canadian assault, Hart Attack to Boris, pin in about 20 seconds.

Go to Mania 7 in Los Angeles where there will be over 100,000 fans! Or not because of “terrorism threats” so we’re going to a smaller place! Pay no attention to the fact that it was reported that Vince couldn’t sell the place out so they moved the event!

Tito is ready for Barbarian and Heenan.

The Barbarian vs. Tito Santana

This is Bobby Heenan’s debut as Barbarian’s manager. Barbarian takes him into the corner to start but Tito comes back with punches to send Barbie to the floor. Back in and a big hip toss puts Tito down but Santana comes back with right hands to the head for two. They run the ropes and Barbarian kicks Santana’s head off to take over. When all else fails, kick the other guy in the face.

Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow but Tito can’t take him down with a dropkick. The flying forearm takes Barbarian down but Heenan puts his foot on the rope. Barbarian slugs him down and goes up top for a BIG clothesline off the top (and a SWEET bump from Tito) for the pin.

Rating: C-. The shot at the end makes up for most of the match sucking. Tito looked like he was dead out there and the flip backwards made it look even better. This was just a way to set up Barbarian as a singles guy which went absolutely nowhere. The guy stayed employed over the years if nothing else though so he’s got something up on a lot of people. Tito was officially a jobber to the stars at this point.

We recap Dusty/Sapphire vs. Macho/Sherri. This started at the Rumble where Brother Love insulted Sapphire and a brawl broke out with Savage and Rhodes. Sherri started attacking Rhodes on TV and a fourway brawl broke out there too.

Rhodes and Sapphire are ready for the mixed tag and say they have the crown jewel, whatever that is.

Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Queen Sherri/Randy Savage

Savage is the King at this point. This is the first mixed tag in company history according to Fink. I don’t know if that’s true but I don’t know of another preceding it. Dusty and Sapphire are introduced at 465lbs. Jesse: “Are you telling me Dusty only weighs 200?” Dusty says cut the music because he’s got the crown jewel: Elizabeth. Savage FREAKS (I think. It’s kind of hard to tell with him) and Jesse is on one of his famous rants.

The genders have to match here so the guys start things off. Sherri tries to interfere but Sapphire makes the save. Dusty throws Sherri into Savage and we’re off to the women. Sapphire shakes her hips into Sherri and hooks an airplane spin for bad measure. Sherri tries a slam which goes as well as you would expect it to. Off to the men again with Sapphire getting in a few slaps from the apron.

The guys go to the floor but Savage runs back in for a top rope ax handle to the floor. He hits it again for good measure but Sapphire gets in the way of the third jump. Back in and Randy hits a suplex for two and drops Rhodes with a shot to the head with the scepter. Sherri hits a top rope splash for two on Dusty because the rules don’t matter I guess. Everything breaks down with Sapphire taking over on Sherri. Liz sends Sherri back inside and it’s a schoolgirl win for Sapphire on the Queen.

Rating: D. Another mess here that was there more for the spectacle than anything else. Most of this show isn’t that good all around and this was another good example. Sapphire continues to be pretty much there as a sight gag but thankfully she would be gone later on in the summer. Not much to see here for the most part.

Liz, Sapphire and Dusty dance.

Another Mania 7 ad.

Bobby Heenan is nearly speechless over Andre beating him up.

Rona Barrett is your usual celebrity that is out of place on a wrestling show.

Savage and Sherri freak out a lot.

Demolition celebrates their title win. This must be intermission. They’re ready for the Hart Foundation.

Now we get one of those famous interviews that is still talked about today. Hogan talks about getting energy from all of the Hulkamaniacs and says that THIS is where the power lies. He’s going to get Warrior down on his knees and ask him if he wants to live forever. Apparently he and the Hulkamaniacs can bring all of the Little Warriors into the light. Hogan: “It doesn’t matter whether you win or whether you lose.” He’s already setting the stage for the loss.

Warrior throws Sean Mooney away, saying Sean doesn’t deserve to breathe his air. He goes on one of his usual rants about how no one can live forever but Hogan’s beliefs can live through him. He talks about darkness and beliefs that come with any and all challenges. Tonight is about merging the Hulkamaniacs and the Warriors together. Warrior may be insane, but he’s really not that much worse than Hogan when you think about it.

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Jannetty and Tanaka start things off and the Rockers take over with their usual speed stuff. Double teaming sends the Express out to the floor before things settle down a bit. Mr. Fuji hooks the top rope, sending Marty out to the floor. Back in again and Jannetty escapes a backdrop and makes the tag off to Shawn. A double superkick puts Tanaka down so it’s off to Sato. Tanaka kicks Shawn in the back and the Rockers are in trouble again.

A gutbuster gets two for Tanaka and a big kick to the face puts Shawn down again. Sato hits a top rope knee drop and it’s off to a nerve hold. Shawn comes back with a big old clothesline and a diving tag to Marty. Things speed up and we get some heel miscommunication. A big backdrop puts Tanaka down but Fuji breaks up the double fist. Marty goes after him and gets salt in the eyes for his efforts. He stumbles into the barricade and that’s a countout.

Rating: C+. Decent tag match here which would be topped by about a mile at the Rumble. These guys needed more time than this and a better finish to be awesome so this one was just ok. The Rockers would start getting awesome in a hurry after this with nearly two years before their famous split. The Express would only have a handful of PPV matches ever and this is the most recent that I’ve seen.

Rhythm and Blues are in the back with Steve Allen cracking jokes at their expense. Greg Valentine as a guitar playing rocker is just wrong.

Dino Bravo vs. Jim Duggan

These two feuded for a long time. Earthquake is here with Dino, sending Gorilla into a rant about how you can’t be a wrestler and a manager. Kazarian would disagree. Jesse brings up how stupid it is to bring an American flag to Canada (against a Canadian at that). This is power vs. power and AMERICAN power takes over early on, sending Bravo out to the floor.

Back in and Duggan misses a charge into the buckle and Dino slugs him down. Jesse: “I don’t like Hacksaw.” Gorilla: “Why not?” Jesse: “He’s so ugly.” Jim comes back with three clotheslines but has to fight off Earthquake. In the distraction he hits Bravo with the board for the pin.

Rating: D. Another filler match, another match that sucked. Duggan was there to get crushed by Earthquake post match. Bravo was a decent lackey and midcard heel for people to beat up, but as usual he was going to lose no matter what he did out there. Except to Ronnie Garvin last year because Garvin sucks.

Duggan gets crushed by Earthquake post match.

We recap DiBiase vs. Roberts. Ted choked him out in MAY and then six months later Jake came after him. I’ve heard of slow builds but this is ridiculous. Roberts held up the belt and that’s about it.

Roberts says he’s going to make Ted beg for mercy.

Million Dollar Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Jake Roberts

DiBiase is quickly sent to the floor as Jesse criticizes Gorilla’s hot dog consumption. The DDT is escaped twice and Ted takes a breather on the floor. Back in and Jake grabs a hammerlock before driving some knees into the arm. Off to another hammerlock as Gorilla starts talking anatomy. Jake has to chase off Virgil though and Ted gets in a shot as Roberts comes back in. Roberts misses a running knee lift and Ted takes over.

Off to a front facelock by DiBiase as the fans are doing The Wave. It goes on for a good while as Ted sends Roberts’ arm into the post. A piledriver puts Jake down but DiBiase doesn’t cover. Off to the Million Dollar Dream for a bit but Jake gets his foot on the ropes. Jake comes back with an atomic drop and a clothesline followed by a backdrop for no cover. The DDT is loaded up but Virgil makes a save, pulling Jake to the floor when the referee isn’t looking. They head to the floor where the Million Dollar Dream is put on again. Jake sends DiBiase into the post but Ted gets back inside anyway to retain.

Rating: C-. This match took a long time to get going but the crowd was into this match for the most part. Apparently DiBiase wins the title even on a countout because this is a non-sanctioned belt. Gorilla thinks DiBiase doesn’t deserve the title because he didn’t earn it, but Jesse says Ted does because Ted paid for it. Point to Jesse.

Jake beats up Virgil and DiBiase because he can with Ted taking a DDT. Roberts shoves some money in Ted’s mouth for fun.

Slick says life is all about money so he’s happy that DiBiase has paid off Akeem to take out Big Boss Man. DiBiase had asked Boss Man to get the belt back from Roberts but since there was no crime, Boss Man turned face for being offered a bribe.

Boss Man doesn’t have much to say.

Big Boss Man vs. Akeem

Boss Man’s face as he rides to the ring is almost scary. DiBiase is waiting at ringside and jumps Boss Man before the bell. Wait apparently it did ring but the referee didn’t care. Good to know. Anyway Akeem pounds away on Boss Man but gets caught in an atomic drop out of the corner. The Boss Man Slam ends this in less than two minutes.

The fans don’t care about Rhythm and Blues.

Mary Tyler Moore likes Wrestlemania.

Here’s Rhythm and Blues to perform Hunka Hunka Hunka Honky Love. The only thing of note here is future WCW World Champion Diamond Dallas Page as the man driving the pink Cadillac into the arena. The Bushwhackers pop up in vendor costumes to beat up the band and break guitars.

The attendance record is announced: 67,678.

Rick Rude vs. Jimmy Snuka

Rude now has straight hair and is all tough instead of being a comedy guy. Steve Allen comes in to do commentary for no apparent reason. Snuka takes over to start with some shots to the head, only to have Rude suplex him down with ease to take over. Jimmy comes back by ramming Rude’s face into the mat, only to get poked in the eye for his efforts. Snuka misses something off the top and jumps into a punch to the ribs. The Rude Awakening ends this quick.

Rating: D. This was there to set up Rude as a threat to the new champion after the main event tonight. That would lead to Summerslam and a main event title match, but that would be about it for Rude in the WWF. Snuka wouldn’t do much here at all and was a total jobber to the stars after this one.

We recap Hogan vs. Warrior. They wound up being the only two guys in the ring at one point in the Rumble and the reaction to their fight was great. They then had some run-ins on SNME and the Main Event and that’s about it. This is much more about a battle of respect and they certainly don’t hate each other.

WWF World Title/Intercontinental Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior

This is title for title. It’s one of those matches where both guys are built up to the point that neither can lose and the fans are completely split on who they want to win. That’s REALLY hard to pull off and I don’t remember a better execution of something like this ever before. The shot of Warrior on the ropes doing his pose as Hogan comes to the ring still sends chills up my back.

They stare each other down and both guys shove the other into the corner. We get the famous test of strength with Warrior taking over to start. Jesse is STUNNED but Hogan fights back up and takes Warrior down to his knees, giving us one of the most popular .gif’s in the history of the internet (implied oral sex if you’re not familiar). Hogan trips Warrior down and drops an elbow for one but Warrior pops up and no sells a slam. Warrior slams Hogan down and clotheslines him to the floor where Hogan might have hurt his knee.

Back in and the brawl is on with Hogan’s knee being fine and not ever mentioned again. Hulk takes over and pounds away at Warrior’s head before getting two off a pair of elbow drops. Off to a front facelock and a small package for two. Hogan hooks a chinlock and pounds away on Ultimate’s head. After a brief break we’re right back to the chinlock followed by a belly to back suplex for two for Hulk.

There’s chinlock #3 and you’re not likely to ever hear the fans freak out as much from someone fighting out of a chinlock as you get here for Warrior. A double clothesline puts both guys down and Hebner counts VERY slowly, which is the right idea here. Warrior grabs the ropes and starts Warrioring Up before hitting some clotheslines. A suplex gets two for Warrior and it’s off to a bearhug on Hulk.

Hogan fights out of the hold with some solid rights to the head but on the breakup, the referee is taken down. Warrior hits a pair of ax handles off the top and starts to get fired up. The shoulder block misses though and Hulk drives him head first into the mat, but there’s no referee. Warrior suplexes Hogan down but there’s still no count. A rollup gets a VERY close two for Hogan and it’s time for the punches.

An elbow sends Warrior out to the floor and Hogan gets posted. Back in and Warrior snaps off some clotheslines followed by the gorilla press into the splash. That gets two and it’s time to Hulk Up. Hogan pounds away and hits the big boot, but the legdrop misses. Warrior hits a fast splash for the surprise pin to win the title and shock the world.

Rating: A. That’s likely high but the crowd here REALLY helps this one. This is a match that just works and there’s almost no other way to put it. I don’t think there’s much of an argument over this not being Hogan’s best match ever and it’s easily Warrior’s first or second best ever depending on your taste about next year’s entry. Either way, this is a great match and one of those matches you have to see at some point as part of being a fan.

Hogan hands Warrior the belt and leaves in the cart, partially stealing the spotlight but it’s not as bad as I remember.

Overall Rating: C+. This is one of those shows that is completely dependent on the main event. Other than that there’s almost nothing here at all, although there’s nothing that horrible. It’s mainly a big group of random(ish) matches with stories to most of them, but almost none of them are anything of note. Still though, it’s pretty fun stuff overall and the main event is must see. It’s not a great show or anything but it’s worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Rick Martel vs. Koko B. Ware

Original: D

Redo: D+

Demolition vs. Colossal Connection

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Earthquake vs. Hercules

Original: D-

Redo: D

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C

Redo: C-

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

Original: A

Redo: D

Hart Foundation vs. Bolsheviks

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Barbarian vs. Tito Santana

Original: D

Redo: C-

Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Randy Savage/Sensational Sherri

Original: D-

Redo: D

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Original: C

Redo: C+

Jim Duggan vs. Dino Bravo

Original: D+

Redo: D

Ted Dibiase vs. Jake Roberts

Original: C

Redo: C-

Big Boss Man vs. Akeem

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Rick Rude vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: C-

Redo: D

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: A+

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: C+

I’m surprised by that Bad News/Piper match more than anything else.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/13/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-6-epitome-of-a-one-match-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – March 8, 2016: It’s Always A Heel Turn

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 8, 2016
Location: Barclayard Arena, Birmingham, England
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s the final night of the UK tour and also the last night of Kurt Angle’s TNA run. Expect to see a lot about Angle tonight as we wrap up his nearly ten year run with the company with a match against Lashley. Other than that it’s hard to say what else we’ll see here but I have a feeling it’s going to include British wrestlers losing a lot because that’s how TNA keeps the fans excited. Let’s get to it.

We open with a quick video on Angle’s final match.

Dixie Carter is in the ring to open things up with the roster and several backstage workers around the ring. She introduces Kurt for his big goodbye and gives him a nice speech without trying to cry. Drew Galloway says he came to TNA for several reasons, including to wrestle the best competition in the world.

Wrestling Kurt is a master class in wrestling and this is a roster that wanted to be professional wrestlers instead of football players or whatever (always get in those shots at WWE guys). Kurt says this retirement has made him better and he’s the luckiest man on this planet. This brings out Lashley to say that while he respects Kurt, it’s going to be a rough last night for him. Lashley thanks Angle for getting him into this business but realizes that Kurt just isn’t ready for tonight.

King of the Mountain Title: Eric Young vs. Bram vs. Big Damo vs. Will Ospreay vs. Jimmy Havoc

King of the Mountain match with Young defending. This is the reverse ladder match where you have to hang the title above the ring. In order to do that though, you have to become eligible by getting a fall on someone, which also sends that someone to a penalty box for one minute. Josh explains the WAY too complicated rules and finally gets around to actually listing off the challengers. Ospreay pins Havoc with a crucifix and goes up the ladder with Young making a save. Havoc gets out and goes on top of the box for a dive to take out Damo and Bram.

Eric piledrives Havoc onto the steps and gets the easy pin to become eligible as well, sending Havoc back to the box in the process. Bram gets a pin on Damo with the Brighter Side of Suffering a few seconds later, giving us a showdown between Young and Bram over who goes up the ladder. Both guys shove each other off the ladder (allowing Josh to get in even more “playing defense” lines) until Ospreay dropkicks Eric off the ladder as well. Young dives off the top with a neckbreaker to put Will down and hang the title to retain at 6:44.

Rating: D. I’m so glad we had this seven minute gimmick match with all the violence and carnage with Young holding on to the title because that’s what the midcard consists of these days. You kind of knew that they weren’t giving it to anyone new here as they’re likely done after this tour. Above that though, I continue to want to cry every time I see Young and Bram standing next to each other with Young getting the push.

Jeff Hardy will be back next week to deal with Young.

We look back at Angle’s debut at Genesis 2006.

Maria talks to Dixie Carter about Mike Bennett and Dixie agrees to give him a chance. Dixie isn’t as wild on Maria being an asset to the Knockouts without seeing some actions.

Decay video.

Back from a break with Maria and Bennett in the ring with Mike saying this company needs him now more than ever. Angle, who ducked him, is leaving so let’s just name him #1 contender already. Instead it’s Drew Galloway with the Feast or Fired case to say that Bennett needs to actually win something. Bennett is ready to fight and says get Dixie but Drew punches him in the face to start a brawl. Mike is chased off by the threat of a Claymore Kick.

Another Kurt moment saw him winning the World Title at Slammiversary 2007. If nothing else this gives us the sweet tones of Don West.

The Wolves and Angle suck up to each other. Kurt passes the ankle lock on to Richards.

Knockouts Title: Jade vs. Gail Kim

Kim is defending after Jade attacked her last week. Gail jumps her to start and fires off forearms in the corner but Jade grabs her with something like an AA. That’s it for her offense at the moment as Gail takes her down and puts on a Figure Four around the post. Back in and Jade grabs an Indian Deathlock with a chinlock, followed by a Fujiwara armbar. Gail avoids a missile dropkick and clotheslines her down for two (playing defense according to Josh). Eat Defeat is countered into a German suplex for another near fall. Jade tries a high cross body but Gail rolls through for the pin to retain (of course) at 6:35.

Rating: C-. Well of course Gail retained because if she didn’t, we might have someone other than Gail Kim as Knockouts Champion and that’s just not a world I want to live in. It seems that we’re leading towards Maria taking the title and possibly taking over the Dollhouse because that needs to be a thing for some reason. The match was fine, albeit identical to almost every Gail Kim match in recent weeks.

Video on Ethan Carter III vs. Rockstar Spud from last week. Carter gets a shot at Hardy next week on the live show.

Matt is livid about having to defend against Ethan again and claims a conspiracy. It doesn’t matter though as he knows he can beat Ethan again.

Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Beer Money

The Wolves are defending in this dream match which is so important that neither team gets an entrance. Eddie takes over on Bobby to start and it’s quickly off to Storm who gets taken down for some elbows to the back. Apparently there was no tag in there so Roode stays in, allowing the Wolves to kick both challengers to the floor for a double suicide dive.

Things settle down to Storm working on a waistlock on Eddie, followed by Roode slapping on a chinlock. Eddie can’t get over for a tag so he settles for two off a sunset flip instead. A double hurricanrana drops both challengers and the hot tag brings in Davey as we take a break. Back with Davey putting Eddie in a leg lock and taking Davey down into an ankle lock at the same time.

Beer Money gets to the ropes and everything breaks down, leaving Storm to enziguri Eddie on the top. A hurricanrana drops Eddie to set up a top rope splash from Roode for two with Davey making the save. There’s the double suplex to Eddie but he breaks up DWI. Davey goes up top but dives into Closing Time, only to land badly and tear his ACL, putting him on the shelf for six to nine months. Last Call into a spinebuster gets two on Eddie before DWI gives Beer Money the titles back at 16:14.

Rating: B. Not exactly a classic but it was a really good match that lived up to enough of the hype. It’s always a shame to see someone go down to an injury like that but I can’t imagine it changed much of the match. Beer Money getting the titles back is a good thing as the Wolves are kind of out of stuff to do with them. If nothing else this might let Eddie revitalize the X-Division for a bit.

We see Kurt’s Hall of Fame induction.

Lashley tells Drew that he’s winning tonight.

We also see Mike Bennett getting in Angle’s face and Kurt calling him a punk.

Here’s Grado who claims he has video proof that he was cheated out of his job. Cue Eli Drake and Jesse Godderz to interrupt before the video can be played. Drake talks about Grado getting fired in a fair match and promises to beat Grado with the briefcase until Grado has no idea where he is anymore. Grado gets beaten down until Mahabali Shera comes in for a slow motion save. The villains screw up with the briefcase going off Godderz’s head, allowing Grado to hit Drake with a cutter and steal the briefcase.

Kurt Angle tribute video with various people praising him.

Kurt Angle vs. Lashley

Lashley has that headband on and it’s already distracting. A headlock doesn’t last long so Angle throws him down with some German suplexes. There’s an overhead belly to belly to send Lashley flying again but he drops Angle face first onto the turnbuckle to take over. Lashley chokes away on the ropes but Kurt comes right back with right hands and rolling German suplexes. That’s fine with Lashley as he throws Kurt around even more. A bad looking Angle Slam gets two for Kurt and he hits three more German suplexes to set up an ankle lock. They’re not even trying to do anything but the big spots here.

Lashley reverses into a cross armbreaker but Kurt reverses into an ankle lock. That’s reversed as well and Lashley gets two off a spinebuster and spear. Another spear gets another two but Kurt avoids a third and grabs the ankle lock with a grapevine. Lashley hangs on for a long time and escapes before sidestepping a charge, setting up the third spear for the pin at 10:58.

Rating: B-. After all that, it wasn’t even eleven minutes long? The match was fine enough but they weren’t even hiding the fact that this was just a tribute match instead of something really good. I’ve seen Kurt do those same signature spots over and over so many times now that it’s really hard to get excited above them all over again. The match was good and all but nothing special as far as quality goes.

Post match Lashley holds up Kurt’s arm before punching him in the face. Of course it’s a heel turn. It’s ALWAYS a heel turn. Drew Galloway and Eddie Edwards come out for saves but get speared down as well. Ethan Carter III comes out for the staredown but Lashley bails before anything happens to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. It’s definitely the best show they’ve done in a long time and most of that is due to them cutting out all of the nonsense and just having the wrestling carry things. Lashley turning heel is a good idea in theory but TNA currently has three top faces with Jeff Hardy, Ethan Carter III and Drew Galloway. TNA relies on the big heel turn way too often as we just had Matt do one about two months ago and now it’s Lashley, who won’t even be the top heel in the company. It’s a good show though and that’s all you can ask for from TNA at this point.

Results

Eric Young b. Will Ospreay, Big Damo, Bram and Jimmy Havoc – Young hung the belt

Gail Kim b. Jade – Kim rolled through a high cross body

Beer Money b. Wolves – DWI to Edwards

Lashley b. Kurt Angle – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania V: The Sequel Is Never Quite As Good

Wrestlemania V
Date: April 2, 1989
Location: Trump Plaza, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 18,946
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

Now for a sequel.  This is more or less the followup to Wrestlemania IV as Savage has snapped on Hogan, claiming that Hulk is jealous of the title and all that jazz. That’s really all you need to know about this show as it’s the only match that means anything at all. Let’s get to it.

Rockin Robin, the reigning Women’s Champion, sings America the Beautiful.

Hercules vs. King Haku

The crown isn’t on the line here. Haku jumps him from behind to start but Herc comes back with a hip toss and a slam followed by a release flapjack. A clothesline puts Haku on the floor but Hercules suplexes him right back in. Some elbow drops keep Haku down but Hercules goes after Heenan like an idiot. Haku jumps him from behind and we head back inside for a pair of backbreakers for a pair of counts.

Since this is a power match we hit the bearhug as even Jesse says this isn’t going to get a submission. Gorilla criticizes Haku’s technique, prompting Jesse to ask what a gorilla would know about bearhugging. Herc breaks the hold and the King yells at the referee, only to get caught by a cross body. Hercules pounds away and hits a running knee lift followed by some clotheslines. A powerslam gets two but Hercules jumps off the top into most of a superkick. Haku misses a top rope headbutt and Hercules wins with the belly to back suplex with a last second shoulder raise.

Rating: C-. Nothing special here but it was a basic enough match to get things going. Hercules was a generic power guy so there wasn’t much to get interested in with him. Haku would join up with Andre to win the tag titles by the end of the year. I’m not sure if there was much of a feud here other than Hercules vs. Heenan which was only touched on.

The Rockers say they can handle the Twin Towers.

Rockers vs. Twin Towers

That would be Big Boss Man/Akeem. Shawn makes his Wrestlemania debut by starting against Big Boss Man and the little guy takes over quickly. He also decks Akeem in the corner and gets to face the bigger man (Akeem, the former One Man Gang). The Rockers start flying in and out of the ring as they work over Akeem’s arm. The arm cranking continues but Akeem makes a blind tag. Marty gets tossed into Boss Man’s arms and crushed by both big men. This is back when Boss Man weighed about 400lbs so it’s a big more painful than it sounds.

The Towers take their turns with fat man offense as Marty is in big trouble in a hurry. Akeem avalanches him in the corner and it’s back to Boss Man. We get heel miscommunication though and Boss Man is knocked to the floor by his own partner. Off to Shawn who pounds away in the corner before both Rockers hit a series of whips into the corner. A double middle rope shoulder finally takes Akeem down for two and it’s back to Shawn on his own.

Akeem KILLS HIM with a clothesline (Jesse: “I think he irritated Akeem!”) but Boss Man misses a top rope splash. The Rockers hit some double dropkicks (one of which sees Shawn completely missing Bossman) but a top rope rana is countered into a wicked powerbomb by Boss Man. Akeem crushes Shawn with a splash for the pin.

Rating: C. Considering how hungover the Rockers were in this match (as confirmed by Shawn), this came off pretty well. The Rockers sold the power offense like few others could, which made for some awesome visuals. They would get a lot better over the coming years but this wasn’t their best performance.

Ted DiBiase talks about hanging out with Donald Trump and having them here to see him beat up Beefcake.

Ted DiBiase vs. Brutus Beefcake

This isn’t for the Million Dollar Title which ticks Gorilla off. Brutus has his AWESOME music at this point. Beefcake jumps DiBiase to start to tick off Jesse as well. Ted bails to the floor and comes back in for some chops, only to be knocked right back to the floor by a right hand. Back in again and Brutus wins a slugout but Vigril trips him up to give DiBiase his first control.

DiBiase pounds away (there’s a lot of punching in this match) and hits the falling punch for two. I love that move. A middle rope ax handle puts Brutus down again but Beefcake reverses a suplex to put DiBiase down right next to him. A double clothesline does the exact same thing but Ted is up first. He tries another suplex which actually works this time, followed by the Million Dollar Dream.

Brutus gets to the rope so they slug it out some more with the barber taking over. Now Beefcake throws on his own sleeper but gets sent out to the floor in a counter. Virgil interferes a bit to distract Beefcake but DiBiase stupidly goes out to the floor as well. They brawl to a double countout to a big boo from the crowd.

Rating: C-. This was mainly a punching match as well as a pretty big fall for DiBiase. To go from the main event to the third match on the card in a year is a pretty big fall, which is saying a lot as DiBiase was still a very evil heel. Brutus was getting very popular very fast and would be paired with Hogan soon after this for a BIG rub.

Brutus beats up Virgil post match and chases them off with the hedge clippers. You know, assault with a deadly weapon as Jesse calls it.

We go to the Wrestlemania brunch with the Bushwhackers eating a lot and trying to talk about their match with the Rougeaus.

Bushwhackers vs. Fabulous Rougeau Brothers

ALL AMERICAN BOYS BABY! That would be the Rougeau’s theme song and one of the most awesome entrances in company history. Seriously, go Youtube that thing. Jimmy Hart loses his jacket somehow but the Rougeaus save it in a humane act. Not that it matters as the Bushwhackers clear the ring a second later. Luke and Ray start things off and Ray quickly takes him down. I turn my head for a minute and come back to hearing Jesse say “So as far as you’re concerned, tear down the Statue of Liberty?” Like I said, commentary was a bit different back then.

Luke and Butch clear the ring of Rougeaus again before it’s down to Luke and Jacques. Butch tries to interfere for no apparent reason and Luke gets caught in a Boston Crab. In a sequence that has haunted me for years, Ray loads up Luke for a slam and while Luke is upside down, he rubs Ray’s crotch. There’s nothing more to it than that and to this day I don’t know why he did that.

Anyway Ray puts on an abdominal stretch as a fan or two chants USA. In theory that would be for the Rougeaus here who are the All American Boys facing the guys from New Zealand. The Rougeaus prematurely hug and get caught by the Battering Ram and a double gutbuster is good for the pin on Ray out of nowhere.

Rating: D. It’s a comedy match and not a very fun one. This is called a big upset but I don’t really see how you can call it that. It’s not like either team is great or even good here and the Bushwhackers were still brand new here, so presumably they had won most of their matches up to this point. I don’t get it but whatever.

Sean Mooney is licked by the Bushwhackers and says words can’t describe it. As someone who has been licked by one as well, that’s very true.

Mr. Perfect vs. Blue Blazer

That would be Owen Hart in a kind of superhero gimmick that eventually led to his death. Perfect is pretty new here too and I believe is debuting his singlet look. Hennig hits a quick hiptoss that doesn’t do much at all. Blazer blocks a slap and takes Perfect down to stagger Hennig a bit.

They slightly botch a flip out of a hiptoss and Blazer dropkicks Perfect to the floor. Blazer hits a quick hiptoss (why is that so popular here?) of his own and a dropkick for no cover. A modified northern lights suplex gets two for Blue but a top rope splash hits knees. Off to a reverse chinlock for a few moments by Perfect but Blazer fights up and hits a standing powerslam and a belly to belly for two each. A crucifix gets two more but Blazer spends too long arguing with the referee and the PerfectPlex ends this clean.

Rating: C+. This match is popular for some reason but it’s only pretty good. Owen would get to show off a lot better later on and the Blazer gimmick didn’t stick around that long. The ending here was clean too which is what Perfect would get quite often around this time. He wouldn’t really do anything of note for about a year though until having a house show feud with Hogan.

Jesse is presented to the crowd again like last year.

Mr. Fuji allegedly runs a 5K run in a tuxedo.

To really make this show feel bloated, here’s Run DMC with the Wrestlemania Rap.

We recap the double tag team turn at Survivor Series 1988 with Fuji leaving Demolition to hook up with the Powers of Pain.

Demolition says they’re ready for Fuj the Stooge.

Tag Titles: Demolition vs. Powers of Pain/Mr. Fuji

Demolition is defending and this is a handicap match. Warlord and Ax get things going with Ax pounding him down quickly. Smash comes in for a double beatdown and it’s off to a neck crank. Back to Ax for the same move and he yells at Fuji a bit. The Demolition beatdown ensues but Warlord powers Ax over to the corner for a tag to Barbarian. He shoves Smash into the corner and is immediately clotheslined down by a fresh Ax. The crowd is dead here.

Barbie gets double teamed by the champions and Ax hooks a neck crank. Back to Smash who gets chopped down before it’s back to Warlord. The advantage lasts for all of three seconds before the Powers finally get some successful cheating going on. Off to Fuji for the first time for some old man offense that is far better than Heenan or Hart at least. Barbarian comes in again and the yet to be named Kick of Fear puts Ax down again for no cover.

The match continues to stay in second gear at best with both teams barely moving at all. Fuji tries the flashiest move of the match by going up top, only to miss Ax. Gorilla: “He hasn’t wrestled in years, just like us.” Jesse: “Us? For Fuji and I it’s been years. For you many years.” Barbarian gets clotheslined down again and it’s off to Smash as everything breaks down. Fuji loads up his salt but hits Warlord by mistake. The Demolition Decapitator is enough to end Fuji and retain the titles.

Rating: D. I’m a fan of Demolition but this was a REALLY weak performance by both teams. The Powers would split soon after this which was the best idea for both guys as they were never going to break through the ceiling with Demolition on top. The title reign would continue to go on for another two months or so, reaching at nearly a year and a half.

Randy Savage has nothing to say other than he’s ready for Hogan.

Ronnie Garvin vs. Dino Bravo

For absolutely no apparent reason, Jimmy Snuka is brought out after the wrestlers’ intros. Bravo jumps him from behind to open the match before it’s off to a bearhug. That goes about three seconds do Dino loads up a powerbomb instead. Garvin escapes and starts a flurry of offense and gets two off a jackknife cover. A sleeper is easily broken up by Bravo and he breaks up a piledriver as well. Garvin tries to pound away in the corner but gets caught in an atomic drop and the side suplex for the pin by Bravo.

Rating: D. This didn’t do anything to get the crowd going which is a big problem with this show: the crowd doesn’t care about most of this stuff and why in the world would they? This is a random match between two guys that have no reason to fight and have no future as a main talent. Nothing to see here at all.

Frenchy Martin, Dino’s manager, gets beaten down by Garvin post match just because.

Brain Busters vs. Strike Force

This is the return of Strike Force after Martel had a bad injury. Blanchard and Martel start things off and Rick almost immediately has to punch out of the wrong corner. Off to Anderson who gets rammed face first into the mat before being put in his own test of strength on the mat. Arn catches Martel in a body scissors but Rick turns it over into his signature Boston Crab.

Blanchard makes the save but Tito immediately comes in to put him in the Figure Four. Martel puts one on Anderson as well as things break down. We get some near falls by Tito but he accidentally hits the forearm on Martel to take him out. Rick gets ticked off as Tito is basically in a handicap match. The Busters get to take over on Tito but you know Santana can hang with either guy.

Arn goes up but gets slammed down, allowing Tito to set up a hot tag to….no one. Martel drops down to the floor and walks out on his partner, officially making it a handicap match. The yet to be named spinebuster from Anderson plants Tito and it’s back to Blanchard. Tully blocks a monkey flip and the spike piledriver kills Tito dead for the pin.

Rating: B-. Best match of the night so far as all four guys were moving out there. Tito could go with the best of them and he had some of the best of them to do that with in this one. Martel and Santana would feud on and off for about a year until they just stopped fighting out of nowhere.

Martel says he’s tired of carrying Tito and that’s that.

It’s time for the return of Roddy Piper in Piper’s Pit, but after a long introduction by Fink, we get Brother Love in a kilt instead. You younguns might know him as Bruce Prichard from Gut Check. Love interviews “himself” and does one heck of a Roddy Piper impression in the process. Morton Downey Jr., a kind of forefather to Jerry Springer, is the actual guest. He runs to the ring and immediately lights up a cigarette and gay jokes abound about Love.

Now the real Piper comes out to make fun of Love for being feminine. Roddy won’t let Love answer any questions by saying he doesn’t really want to know that badly. Morton is on his fifth cigarette or so at this point. This goes on FOREVER until Love says he’s a bit Scotch. You know, as in from Scotland. Piper rips off Love’s kilt and the Brother sprints off. Finally we get to Downey who implies he slept with Piper’s mom.

Morton keeps blowing smoke in Piper’s face as Piper makes fun of Downey for having warts on his face. Piper gets annoyed with the smoke and Downey calls him a transvestite. Roddy asks for a smoke of his own and sprays Downey with a fire extinguisher. This took FIFTEEN MINUTES, as in longer than all but the main event tonight.

We get an ad for No Holds Barred, Hogan’s acting debut.

Donald Trump likes hosting Wrestlemania.

Ventura goes into a hilarious rant against Hogan for invading Hollywood because Hogan needs a job after Savage beats him tonight. Jesse shouts that Hulk can drive his limo and storms off.

We recap the Megapowers feud as intermission continues. Basically Savage won the title at Mania 4 then teamed up with Hogan. Hogan kept getting the pins and finally at Main Event II, Savage accidentally wiped out Elizabeth. Hogan took Liz to the back to get attention but it left Savage alone. Finally Savage slapped Hogan and turned heel again, leading to the heel promo of a lifetime as he ERUPTED on Hogan, letting out every bit of his pent up rage and jealousy before blasting Hogan with the title in the medical room.

Hogan says it was Savage eaten alive by the jealousy and the title is coming home tonight. This somehow turns into a talk about destroying the Trump Plaza, which I think he touched on last year too.

Andre the Giant vs. Jake Roberts

Big John Studd is referee and comes out to what would become Jim Duggan’s music. This was supposed to set up Andre vs. Studd but Studd left before it went anywhere. Sometime before the match, Andre and Heenan get the turnbuckle pad off and Jake goes face first into the steel. Ventura and Gorilla talk about David vs. Goliath (Jesse: “He used a foreign object.”) as Jake reaches for the snake bag. That goes nowhere so Studd crushes him in the corner.

Andre looks so different than he did two years ago. In Detroit he looked like a killing machine but here he looks like a lumbering oaf. Giant steps on Jake a few times but Roberts comes back with some strikes. He knocks Andre into the ropes and chokes away, only to see Andre get his arm loose and choke Jake right back.

In a moment that I’ve never seen explained, Andre fires some shoulders into Jake in the corner, only to stagger backwards. I’m guessing Jake was supposed to knee him (the announcers suggested he did) but Jake’s legs never moved. Either way, Roberts pounds away a bit before being knocked to the floor. Studd and Andre get in a shoving match as Ted DiBiase runs out to steal the snake. Andre chokes Studd until Jake chases DiBiase down and gets the snake back. He slides Damien in and the giant runs from the smaller referee giant, giving Jake the DQ win.

Rating: D. ANOTHER match that didn’t go anywhere here as it was hard to buy Jake as being a threat to Andre while at the same time it was hard to be intimidated by the Giant due to how old and banged up he was. Nothing match here which was supposed to set up Andre vs. Studd, but instead Studd retired so Andre got a tag title reign instead.

Sensational Sherri wants to fight Rockin Robin and hopes Liz gets hurt today.

Greg Valentine/Honky Tonk Man vs. Hart Foundation

Valentine and Honky aren’t Rhythm and Blues yet. Bret and Honky start and it’s atomic drops all around. Honky sells his hilariously but Greg plays it a bit more serious. Off to Anvil for some power but Bret misses the middle rope elbow. The beating begins and you know Hart is going to sell things very well. Valentine gets to pound away as Gorilla says Greg isn’t warmed up yet.

Honky hits the Shake Rattle and Roll but tags in Valentine for the Figure Four instead. Greg gets rolled up for two instead as Gorilla goes NUTS complaining about Honky not covering. The hot tag brings in Anvil again to clean house on both heels. A great clothesline gets two on the Hammer before it’s back to Bret for the middle rope elbow. Everything breaks down and Bret gets Jimmy Hart’s megaphon to drill Honky for the pin.

Rating: D+. Enough filler matches already! This is probably the fourth match out of ten so far that have been there with no particular reason for it to happen. The show is already well over two and a half hours now and there are still four matches to go. That’s one of the problems with the late 80s: they made the shows long for the sake of having them be long.

We recap Rude vs. Warrior which is basically just because Rude attacked Warrior at the Rumble Super Posedown and the champion wants revenge.

Intercontinental Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Rick Rude

Warrior is defending but Rude has the belt imprinted on his tights. Rude tries a knee to the ribs but hits the belt by mistake. Warrior immediately takes over with the power game and LAUNCHES Rude into the corner. The champ throws on a bearhug for a bit until Rude finally pokes him in the eyes to escape. Rude busts out a MISSILE DROPKICK for two but gets launched off Warrion on the kickout.

Back to the hearhug but Rude gets out the same way as he did the first time. Warrior responds by biting Rude in the face but the splash hits knees. A piledriver puts Warrior down but Rick can’t immediately cover. It only gets two but the kickout is much weaker than earlier. Rude tries to swivel his hips but his back is too messed up. He cranks back on Warrior’s arms but the champion gets to the ropes and starts shaking away.

Here come the shoulders from Warrior and he plants Rude face first into the mat a few times. Warrior tries a slam or something but drops Rude and almost puts him on the floor. Rude gets a boot up in the corner to stop a charging Warrior but the Rude Awakening is broken through pure power. Rick is clotheslined to the floor and Warrior suplexes him back in, only to have Heenan trip Warrior up and hold down his foot for the shocking upset and the title to Rude. This might have been Warrior’s first televised loss but I don’t think it was.

Rating: B. This is one of those pairings that just worked no matter what you had them do. You often hear about people having chemistry and that’s what you had here: these two could just work well together for no apparent reason and this is a fine example. Warrior would get the title back later in the year before moving to the world title scene a few months later. Good match here.

Warrior beats up Heenan post match. Remember that for later.

Bad News Brown vs. Jim Duggan

This show MUST continue! Again no reason to this match and they’re just fighting to fill in another five minutes on this already WAY too long card. They punch each other a lot and Duggan knocks him to the floor. Brown comes back in with his judo stuff but misses the Ghetto Blaster (running enziguri). Bad News gets annoyed and goes to the floor for a chair but Duggan hits it with the board for the double DQ.

Rating: D-. This is the twelfth match on this show and we’re over three hours and three minutes into it already. There is no reason at all for this to be continuing but it is anyway just because. Duggan would go on to feud with whoever he could find as would Brown, showing why this match didn’t need to happen at all.

Red Rooster says he’ll beat Heenan and it’ll be a great day in the barnyard.

Red Rooster vs. Bobby Heenan

There’s actually a backstory: Heenan managed Rooster but said he was limited so Rooster dumped Heenan. Bobby is hurt so he brings the Brooklyn Brawler with him. Those sentences take as long to type as the match lasts as Rooster hits him once, Heenan misses a charge into the post, gets whipped into the buckle and the match is over in 30 seconds. To recap, Rooster beat him with an Irish whip.

Just to drag this out EVEN LONGER, the Brawler beats the Rooster up, because WE HAVE TO PUSH BROOKLN FREAKING BRAWLER.

Liz says she’ll be in a neutral corner tonight and won’t cheer for either guy in the main event.

Tony Schiavone and Sean Mooney fill in even MORE time.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

This is huge and Savage is on fire here. As I said Liz is in a neutral corner despite never being Hogan’s manager as a singles guy ever. Savage comes out first for no apparent reason. Savage immediately heads to the floor to stall as you would expect him to do. The fans HATE him at this point after loving him like crazy a year earlier. Hogan finally shoves Savage down and it’s time to stall some more.

Back up and Hogan shoulders him down again for the third trip to the floor for Savage. As Jesse and Gorilla get in an argument over the value of managers, Savage grabs a headlock. Hulk shoves him off and Randy heads outside, only to hide behind Liz in a truly evil move. Back in again and Hogan actually uses a nice amateur move and hooks a front facelock. That wasn’t bad at all. Savage powers out of it (surprising as well) and pokes Hogan in the eye to take over.

A top rope ax handle gets one on Hogan and it’s off to an armbar. In something you don’t often see, Hogan is pulled down to the mat by his hair. It feels weird even typing that. Hulk uses a handful of trunks to launch Randy out to the floor and Jesse freaks out. Back in and a clothesline puts Randy down, followed by a series of elbow drops. Hulk is bleeding above the eye.

Randy gets in a shot to the face and puts on a fast sleeper which is transitioned into a chinlock. Hulk comes back with an atomic drop but an elbow drop misses. A shot into the buckle sets up a rollup with trunks for two on Hulk. Savage stomps on his fingers which ticks Hogan off. Hogan slams Savage to the floor where the champion doesn’t want Liz’s help. Hulk follows him out and rams Randy’s face into the barricade.

Savage escapes being posted and sends Hogan in by mistake. After sending Hulk back in, Randy yells at Liz a bit more and shoves her up the aisle. The referee ejects Liz, making the only interesting factor a nonfactor. Back to the floor and Savage drops the ax handle off the top to send Hogan throat first into the barricade. Savage goes after the throat with various evil measures but the elbow only gets two. Hulk Up, big boot, leg drop, new champion.

Rating: B-. It’s Hogan vs. Savage so these two are always going to have at least a watchable match, but at the end of the day this was pretty much designed to be a Hogan win and that’s what it wound up being. The smart move would be to have Savage keep the title by DQ or something, causing Hulk to chase the title until Summerslam for the title change. But instead we go with the easy (and not horrible) ending. It’s a good match here but not great.

Hogan celebrates forever to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was pretty terrible. The main words you probably heard me say in here were things like “it keeps going” or “filler”. That’s the problem with this show: there’s WAY too much stuff going on with 14 matches, that stupid rap, and the fifteen minute Piper segment. This show runs nearly three hours and forty minutes which is WAY too much for a single show given what they had going on at this point. Probably five matches at minimum could be called filler here. That’s WAY too much and I can see why this is considered such a lame show.

Ratings Comparison

Hercules vs. King Haku

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Twin Towers vs. Rockers

Original: C

Redo: C

Brutus Beefcake vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Bushwhackers vs. Fabulous Rougeau Brothers

Original: D-

Redo: D

Mr. Perfect vs. Blue Blazer

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Demolition vs. Powers of Pain/Mr. Fuji

Original: C-

Redo: D

Dino Bravo vs. Ronnie Garvin

Original: F

Redo: D

Brain Busters vs. Strike Force

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Jake Roberts vs. Andre the Giant

Original: D

Redo: D

Hart Foundation vs. Honky Tonk Man/Greg Valentine

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Rick Rude vs. Ultimate Warrior

Original: B

Redo: B

Jim Duggan vs. Bad News Brown

Original: F

Redo: D-

Red Rooster vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: D

Wow that was a rather boring redo.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/12/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-5-hogan-vs-savage-and-thats-about-it/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – March 7, 2016: Going Home For The Show After The Show Before The Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 7, 2016
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

Now this could be interesting as the company is hardly on a creative roll at the moment and we’re in one of the biggest smark havens in the world. We’re also five days away from Roadblock which suddenly has the potential to change the entire Wrestlemania card with less than a month before the biggest show of the year. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Vince vowing to renounce Shane as his son after Wrestlemania. I still have no idea why this is supposed to be interesting or a major plot point as the McMahons are always arguing.

Here’s Shane to get things going. Shane sucks up to the Chicago crowd and it’s clear that they’re excited to see him. He was watching Raw last week and heard what Undertaker was saying about his match. Shane respects Undertaker completely but he wasn’t surprised by what Vine said about him after the fact. Vince has lost touch with both his reality and his grandsons but Shane is ready to stop it all. At Wrestlemania, he stops all the backstage politics and all the authority. Shane is tired of seeing all the talent being held back with no breaks and all the breaks given to people with no talent.

The gong goes off but it’s a strutting Vince instead. Vince laughs at the fans for not being happy to see him so the CM PUNK chants start up. The boss lets it die off and talks about how Stephanie is getting everything. Earlier today Vince was looking at a picture of Shane at his first wrestling show and of course we get to see it on the screen. Vince pulls the actual photo from somewhere and crushes the frame like he’ll do at Wrestlemania.

After Shane loses, Vince will be able to wrap his arms around his grandsons and prove to them that their family isn’t a bunch of losers because his greatest creation is going to destroy his greatest failure. Vince sends out the security but Shane actually beats them up to a HUGE ovation, most of which isn’t deserved.

The segment was better than most of anything we saw last week but I’m still really not sure what the heck they’re fighting about. Thankfully they’ve seemed to drop the whole lockbox concept which wasn’t working to say the least but Shane having a proxy would work better as an idea.

Kevin Owens vs. Neville

Non-title so look for another upset. Owens drives him into the corner to start and stomps away, meaning he survives longer than he did against Neville a few weeks back. Kevin: “Come on mate!” Neville comes back with kicks to send Owens to the floor but misses a dive, allowing Kevin to send him into the steps as we take a break. Back with Neville fighting out of a chinlock, only to be flipped over with a German suplex.

The Cannonball is countered with a nice enziguri to knock Owens to the floor, setting up a great looking shooting star off the top to the outside. The fans REALLY like that one but don’t care as much for the standing shooting star press for two back inside. Neville charges into a boot to the face but rolls away from a springboard moonsault. A superkick sets up the middle rope Phoenix Splash for a very, very close two. Thankfully Neville stays on him but Owens grabs a rollup with the trunks for the pin at 10:25.

Rating: C+. Those high spots from Neville helped carry this, leading us to the more important ending of Owens winning. The cheating helps but I was worried that they would job him AGAIN here to set up something at Wrestlemania. It’s also nice to see Neville getting some prominent spots instead of just in a nothing six man tag.

Post match Owens loads up the apron powerbomb but SAMI ZAYN runs in and cleans house, likely setting up a big Intercontinental Title match at Wrestlemania.

Video from the Rock saying Wrestlemania is free for new WWE Network subscribers.

Long recap of HHH and Ambrose from last week.

Dolph Ziggler and Zack Ryder (with a beard) are in the back when Stephanie comes up. Stephanie thanks Ziggler for taking down a tweet about the Authority earlier today but Dolph mentions taking down the Authority a few years back. Stephanie doesn’t remember that and reminds Ziggler that she’s his boss. As if we could forget as that’s pretty much her whole character. Stephanie likes these flashbacks and gives Ziggler an elimination tag against three members of the League of Nations. Oh and Ziggler won’t have any partners.

Brie Bella vs. Summer Rae

Total Divas match, meaning we get a clip from tomorrow’s show with Nikki telling Brie how to live. Summer takes her down to start but Brie comes right back with the YES Kicks and a horrible looking BRIE MODE knee. Brie misses a middle rope cross body but here’s Lana for a distraction, allowing Summer to grab a rollup for the pin at 2:05. They haven’t used that finish as much lately so it’s not as annoying here.

Post match Lana comes to the ring and gives Brie a Bella Buster for some of her first ever physicality.

Here’s Dean Ambrose to open the second hour. He gets right to the point: this Saturday he’s hijacking the car on the road to Wrestlemania by being HHH to win the title. Dean talks about all the things he’s going to get to do like being on the cover of People Magazine and throwing out the first pitch at baseball games.

After Wrestlemania, HHH is going to have to buy Dean a new suit and lapel pins….which he doesn’t know how to work. Actually Dean isn’t going to do any of these things that come along with being WWE Champion but he loves the idea of being WWE Champion and getting to come out here and fight everyone every single night.

Cue HHH who threatens to beat Ambrose up again. Dean says he’ll take another trip to the announcers’ table and hold that WWE Championship up high. Dean: “When I do that, you can suck it.” HHH calls Roadblock a clever name that marketing came up with because Dean is at best a speed bump or a pothole. Dean wants to fight right now but HHH fights on his own time. As for tonight, Dean gets to face Bray Wyatt. That gives him a preview of Sunday where he learns that the Authority always wins.

Dolph Ziggler vs. League of Nations

Elimination rules with Del Rio as the odd man out. Barrett gets things going with the King pounding away and getting two off the Winds of Change. The knees in the ropes (which are similar to the ones Shane threw earlier tonight) set up the ten forearms from Sheamus, even though Ziggler started to fall down in the ropes. Rusev comes in for a running splash against the ropes for two. At least he isn’t talking about how much he loves Summer or Lana at the time as that feud (which wasn’t as bad as people made it out to be) is best forgotten.

A surprisingly good dropkick gets two for Rusev and it’s back to Barrett for some forearms to the back in the corner. Sheamus comes in and slowly stomps away, followed by the knee to the ribs. Barrett charges into the running DDT and goes shoulder first into the post, setting up a superkick for the first elimination. Sheamus takes a superkick as well but Rusev breaks it up. The Brogue Kick misses but Rusev kicks Ziggler in the head, setting up the Brogue for the pin 6:39.

Rating: C-. This could have been much worse as I can live with Ziggler getting one pin, especially since the League didn’t have to make an immediate save given how the rules were set up. The League is good as the enforcers for the Authority and roles like this but I’m not sure how much longer they can survive given how they’ve been treated lately.

We look back at Shane and Vince from earlier.

Video on Shane McMahon’s in-ring career.

Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks bicker about who would have won last week.

Naomi/Tamina vs. Becky Lynch/Sasha Banks

Can’t they bring up Blue Pants and Deonna Purrazzo instead of making us watch these four again? Charlotte and Ric are at ringside because Flair needs a paycheck this badly. Cole talks about how we’ve seen this match before. At least they’re just acknowledging that their matches are repetitive now. Becky gets thrown into the heel corner to start and a right hand puts her down again. Tamina misses a charge in the corner and it’s off to Sasha as everything breaks down. The Bank Statement (Cole: “THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO MCGREGGOR!”) puts Tamina away at 2:00.

Post match Charlotte comes in and beats down the winners.

R-Truth is delivering a pizza to Goldust (who thankfully was just right there when Truth came in) and asks to be his partner again. Goldust says a good partner would know that he was lactose intolerant and slams the pizza down. Mark Henry comes up and takes the pizza.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. AJ Styles/Chris Jericho

New Day is defending. Before the match, Big E. wants to talk about the matching tattoos they’ve gotten but apparently only he got the blue and purple unicorn. Of course Big E. was just joking until Jericho cuts him off and saves some face. Jericho and Styles now have Y2AJ shirts. Kofi gets sent to the floor to start and the challengers hit a nice double plancha to take us to an early break.

Back with Jericho in trouble but nailing a dropkick to Big E. An enziguri drops Kingston and there’s the hot tag to AJ. The moonsault reverse DDT hits as close to seamlessly as I’ve ever seen but AJ springboards into the Midnight Hour for two as Chris saves. The Lionsault crushes Kofi and AJ adds the springboard 450 for two with Big E. pulling Kingston to the floor. AJ drops Big E. with a slingshot forearm but misses the backfist to Kofi.

Back to Jericho who counters Trouble in Paradise into the Walls. AJ stops Woods from making the save but gets driven hard into the barricade. Big E. gets back up for the tag so Jericho tries the Walls on him, which doesn’t quite work. Instead Jericho sends Big E. into the post but the Codebreaker is countered into the Big Ending for the clean pin to retain at 11:38.

Rating: B+. They had me a few times in this one and the action after the hot tag to AJ never really stopped. This was more of a showcase for AJ than anything else with the springboards looking as smooth as they have yet in WWE. Jericho getting pinned clean opens up a few doors but I’m not sure where New Day goes at Wrestlemania, unless Bullet Club gets a very fast callup. AJ and Jericho could go various places as well.

Post match AJ and Jericho get an ovation but Jericho turns heel with a Codebreaker to Styles. That might have worked better if Jericho hadn’t just lost clean but at least we get a FOURTH match between these two. I mean, just a thought but maybe you shouldn’t do a (potential) Wrestlemania match three times before Wrestlemania. Jericho gives him two more Codebreakers for good measure before stuffing the Y2AJ shirt in AJ’s mouth.

Back from a break with Jericho complaining about the fans chanting for AJ. They can enjoy it while they can because they won’t be chanting for AJ Styles anymore.

Tyler Breeze vs. Kalisto

Non-title. Breeze blasts him in the face to start as the announcers talk about Jericho. A chinlock doesn’t go very far and it’s the corkscrew cross body into the Salida Del Sol for the pin on Breeze at 2:17.

Big Boss Man Hall of Fame announcement. I’m so happy over this one.

Kalisto is in the back and talks about idolizing people like Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero at Wrestlemania. Cue Ryback to ask why he doesn’t have a Wrestlemania match yet. Kalisto might be one of the best pound for pound wrestlers in WWE today but that’s not what we’re talking about here. Ryback says Kalisto has a mask just like a superhero but that’s not how things work in the real world. Kalisto needs to be the US Champion on his own instead of as one half of the Lucha Dragons. Watch him do this on his own tonight. No match was made here and it felt more like a way to split up the Dragons (thank goodness).

Here are the Social Outcasts to talk about how sad it is that Ryback doesn’t want to be part of a team. He can’t play team dodgeball (like on Heath Slater’s new show Game Night on WWE.com) or be a Ghostbuster, but above all that he can’t be a Social Outcast. Tonight the Axeman cometh, which means they all start making strange noises and chopping the air with their hand.

Ryback vs. Curtis Axel

This is joined in progress after a break (because reasons) with Axel getting in his jobber offense until the Thesz press allows Ryback to slam Axel head first into the mat. A CM Punk style running knee in the corner (complete with a Go To Sleep motion) sends Axel to the floor but an Outcasts distraction lets Axel get in a cheap shot for two. Just like last week, Ryback pounds him down into near unconsciousness, setting up the Shell Shock for the pin at 2:08. Again, no reason for this to go to a break before the match.

We recap the opening again.

Stephanie comes in to see Vince and asks what happens if Shane wins.

Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray still has nothing to do at Wrestlemania but he does talk about conquering the conqueror this Saturday. Tonight he’ll use Dean as an example. No Family with Bray this week. Some early elbows put Bray in trouble and Dean cranks on both legs at the same time. Dean drives in even more elbows to Bray’s head in the corner until Bray runs him over with the cross body as we take a break.

Back with Bray suplexing Dean to keep control before taking him outside for a double clothesline. They get back in with Dean hammering away and trying the rebound lariat, only to have Bray take Dean’s head off because he’s smart enough to figure out that Dean is doing the exact same thing he always does. Dean knocks him out to the floor but the suicide dive is countered into Sister Abigail. That’s countered as well so Bray Rock Bottoms him onto the barricade. Back in again and Dean scores with the rebound lariat followed by the top rope elbow, only to have the Wyatts come in for the DQ at 11:50.

Rating: C+. I was digging this one until the ending that you kind of had to know was coming. At least they didn’t have either of them doing a clean job here as I was kind of expecting them to. Bray countering the rebound lariat was a nice touch too because wrestlers being smart is always cool to see. Good main event though it’s more of a storytelling device than anything else.

Post match the Wyatts destroy Dean until HHH comes out. Bray stares at HHH and even touches the title (fans: “YES!”) before the Family leaves. HHH loads up the announcers’ table but walks into Dirty Deeds. Dean holds up the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. While still not a very good show, this was WAY better than what they did last week. It’s amazing how much better a show is when you have anything besides Stephanie reminding us (AGAIN) that she’s the most amazing thing since that time Randy Savage woke up Hulk Hogan with a top rope elbow because Hogan only Hulked Up from finishers. The problem here though is that this Wrestlemania really isn’t very strong and there’s only so much they can do to build that up, especially with the lack of people actually appearing.

I can’t imagine anything big happens at Roadblock but maybe they’ll throw in a big (and possibly much needed) curve ball. That being said, the idea of Reigns not appearing until Wrestlemania (as Raw is in Pittsburgh, Philadelphia and Brooklyn before then) might not be out of the question either. It really is a weird build to Wrestlemania and I’m not sure what’s going to happen before we get there. In this case though, I’m not liking that feeling.

Results

Kevin Owens b. Neville – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Summer Rae b. Brie Bella – Rollup

League of Nations b. Dolph Ziggler – Brogue Kick

Becky Lynch/Sasha Banks b. Tamina/Naomi – Bank Statement to Tamina

New Day b. Chris Jericho/AJ Styles – Big Ending to Jericho

Kalisto b. Tyler Breeze – Salida Del Sol

Ryback b. Curtis Axel – Shell Shock

Dean Ambrose b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when the Wyatt Family interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Big Boss Man Announced For WWE Hall of Fame

LONG overdue for me, even though he wasn’t the biggest star.  He and Hogan made a fortune back in 1989 and he was one of those guys who was always around.  I’m very happy with this one.




Ring of Honor TV – March 2, 2016: How To Clone An ACH

Ring of Honor
Date: March 2, 2016
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 675
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Mr. Wrestling III

We’re officially in one of those weird periods where the pay per view has passed but we’re still not done with the old taping cycle so this will be a lot of stuff that has nothing to do with the Anniversary Show or its fallout. We do however had a big match with Silas Young/Beer City Bruiser vs. Dalton Castle’s Boys. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Silas Young/Beer City Bruiser vs. The Boys

The Boys are Brent and Brandon (named a few weeks back but not mentioned here). Before the match, Dalton Castle sneaks in from behind and gets in a few cheap shots on Young and Bruiser but the Boys stand back and let them regroup on the floor. Great, so now they’re mad. Castle is escorted out and we get down to a regular match. Before the action starts, Young rips on the Boys for failing every task he gave them. There is no fairy tale ending tonight though and Young is so confident he and Bruiser will win that he’ll put his career on the line in this match.

We get a second bell so I’m not sure if the match just started or if we’re two minutes in. Bruiser starts with we’ll say Brent as the announcers preview the show and ignore the match. Brent can’t do a thing with Bruiser so it’s off to Brandon for a double clothesline. That goes nowhere either so it’s a double Eat Defeat to stagger the big man. Bruiser smacks Brent down and we take a break. Back with Brent flipping out of a rollup and bulldogging Young down. The hot tag brings in Brandon and everything breaks down with Bruiser getting DDT’ed for two.

Young catches Brandon in the DDT into the bottom buckle but Bruiser’s top rope splash is countered with….well it was supposed to be a cutter but looked more like a jumping uppercut. Either way it only gets two, followed by Brent flipping off Brandon’s shoulders to take both guys down at once. Brandon follows with a big moonsault and a faceplant gets two on Young. Not that it matters as the Bruiser comes back in and crushes both Boys in the corner with a Cannonball, giving Silas the pin at 8:30.

Rating: C+. It’s the power vs. speed dynamic working again, as if there was any doubt it was going to. The Boys looked like any given jobber team coming into this but they wound up being a surprisingly decent high flying team. I’m not sure how long they can have the Boys as valets when it’s clear they can wrestle well enough but the Castle character has evolved well so far so hopefully the trend continues.

Dalton tries to run in post match but gets taken out as well.

Adam Cole is ready for Matt Sydal tonight.

Top Prospect Tournament Semi-Finals: Brian Fury vs. Action Ortiz

Ortiz takes him down to start and runs the smaller (though still good sized) Fury over, knocking him out to the floor. A big flip dive over the top crushes Fury (or at least his shoulder as Ortiz didn’t make perfect contact) for two back inside. Brian dropkicks the knee out and Ortiz is in trouble for a bit, only to come back with some right hands to the jaw. Another right hand drops Fury but he raises his boot on the way down for an “accidental” low blow. A sitout Sky High gives Fury the pin to advance at 4:05.

Rating: D+. Fury, who reminds me of Test (in a good way), was the better option here as Ortiz is really just an update on Bam Bam Bigelow. This whole tournament is kind of hard to get a handle on as the characters are being built from the ground up, which is a very tricky move to pull off. The match wasn’t the best in the world either as Ortiz was yet another big guy who can fly while Fury is a fairly generic guy with some decent power. Fury isn’t much but I liked him a lot better than Ortiz.

Fury doesn’t care who is in the finals with him because he hasn’t shown us anything yet.

Top Prospect Tournament Semi-Finals: Lio Rush vs. Punisher Martinez

Martinez has impressed me more than anyone else in this tournament and definitely has a presence about him. Lio slugs away to start and has to escape from the sitout chokeslam. Punisher misses a running big boot and they head outside with Lio getting in a running kick to the chest to drop Martinez for the first time. A springboard is quickly countered as Lio gets caught in a jawbreaker and the beating is on.

Lio rolls back out to the floor, only to have Punisher dive over the top for a great looking plancha. It would have looked even better if it had come close but at least it was a great dive. The apron Last Ride is escaped but Rush jumps up to the apron for a springboard into a tornado DDT (because everyone gets to use the tornado DDT) onto the floor. Back in and Punisher shrugs it off (granted it wasn’t much of a DDT) to set up a super chokeslam, but Lio counters into something resembling a C4 (landing on his own head in the process) for the pin at 6:04.

Rating: C. So much for Punisher getting to show off. I mean, we have ACH Jr. and that’s what matters around here. For the life of me I do not get the appeal of Rush while Martinez is a monster with a great look. Hopefully he gets hired by someone soon because I had a good time watching him. There’s a future for him either on his own or as a bodyguard and it should be awesome.

During the pin, you can see A LOT of empty seats opposite the camera. That’s a rare slip up from ROH.

Rush (who sounds like a Briscoe) is ready for the finals.

Matt Sydal vs. Adam Cole

Feeling out process to start as they have a lot of time to spend here. Cole takes him into the corner but Sydal trips him up and grabs an Indian Deathlock with a chinlock. The bridging forces Sydal to break the hold after a few seconds though and Cole takes over with a jawbreaker. Sydal gets shoved off the top for a big crash onto the apron and it’s time for Cole to take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit before taking an early break.

Back with Cole walking into an enziguri, followed by a standing moonsault for two. Sydal tries to fly around too much though and dives into Cole’s arms, allowing Adam to slam him into the apron and take over again. A Shining Wizard gets two on Matt but he hurricanranas Cole off the ropes to break up a Canadian Destroyer. Cole shrugs that off as well and grabs the Figure Four but it’s countered as fast as any other Figure Four. Back up again and Cole scores with two straight superkicks so Sydal takes him down with a reverse hurricanrana. The Shooting Star puts Cole away at 12:30.

Rating: B-. The match was fun and they’re setting up Sydal for his big house show title match, though I would have liked it to be against someone a little less important than Cole. It was entertaining though and a very ROH style match which isn’t exactly my thing most of the time but at least Cole looked awesome. Sydal as a house show challenger is fine enough but there are too many people who wrestle that style on the roster at the moment.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling helped make up for the mostly non-existent storyline advancement. That’s the thing you have to get used to in Ring of Honor though and I can’t really say I’m surprised. These stand alone shows are very hit or miss most of the time so this could have been a lot worse and the mostly decent wrestling helped get them through the hour.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestlemania IV: Tournaments Are Awesome!

Wrestlemania IV
Date: March 27, 1988
Location: Trump Plaza Hotel and Casino, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 18,165
Commentators: Jesse Ventura, Gorilla Monsoon

Well the crowd is only about 1/5 the size of the one we had last year but there are even more matches this year. This is a one idea show: we’ve got a tournament. The WWF Title is vacant due to the ending of Hogan vs. Andre II at The Main Event (for you ratings people, this show earned a 15 rating on NBC live on a Friday night. Wrestling used to be HUGE.) when there was a twin referee brought in to cost Hogan the title. The title is now vacant and will be decided tonight. Let’s get to it.

Before I forget, it should be noted that as this aired, the NWA (WCW) was airing the first live Clash of the Champions for free on TBS. That show would have one of the best matches the company ever produced with Sting challenging Flair for the world title for the first time.

Here are the tournament brackets.

Hogan

BYE

Andre

BYE

Jim Duggan

Ted DiBiase

Don Muraco

Dino Bravo

Ricky Steamboat

Greg Valentine

Randy Savage

Butch Reed

Bam Bam Bigelow

One Man Gang

Rick Rude

Jake Roberts

Gene welcomes us to the show and presents Gladys Knight to sing America the Beautiful.

Battle Royal

Bret Hart, Jim Neidhart, Jim Powers, Paul Roma, Sika, Danny Davis, B. Brian Blair, Jim Brunzell, Bad News Brown, Sam Houston, Jacques Rougeau, Ray Rougeau, Ken Patera, Ron Bass, Junkyard Dog, Nikolai Volkoff, Boris Zhukov, Hillbilly Jim, Harley Race, George Steele

Just for a big trophy here. Steele chills on the floor and Bob Uecker is in on commentary here. Sam Houston is put out quick as is Sika. Brunzell is sent to the apron by Nikolai but he makes the save. Both Bee’s are sent to the apron but Steele pulls Neidhart out to the floor. Both of the Bees are put out as is Ray Rougeau as the ring is thinning out a bit. Dog puts Bass out but has to fight off the Bolsheviks.

Hillbilly Jim is put out and Roma puts Davis out as well. We’re down to nine and Powers is out too. We’ve got Volkoff, Zhukov, Hart, Roma, Jacques Rougeau, Race, Brown, Patera and Dog. Race and Dog headbutt each other with the canine man winning. Nikolai is dumped by Patera and Zukov gets the same treatment.

Patera is pulled to the floor by Volkoff as Race and Rougeau go out. So it’s JYD, Hart and Brown to go. Dog gets on all fours to headbutt both heels but they finally catch up on him with some double teaming. He gets dumped out and Hart and Brown seem to be willing to split the win. Brown of course turns on Hart and dumps him out to win the trophy.

Rating: D+. This was nothing of note other than the potential beginning of Bret’s first aborted singles push. The problem with battle royals is the same most of the time: there’s no reason for most of them to happen and with no story, there’s not much interest in the match. Sometimes you’ll get a good one, but this wasn’t it.

Brown stands next to the trophy (which stands about 6’0) but Bret jumps him and destroys the trophy.

Fink explains the tournament structure (mainly time limits and saying it’s winners only advancing) and introduces Robin Leech (hosted a show called Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous) to read a proclomation.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Ted DiBiase vs. Jim Duggan

DiBiase is one of the favorites here as he tried to buy the title which started the whole mess. Andre and Virgil are with him here. Ted immediately hides in the corner as the Battle of Mid-South begins. Duggan wins a slugout and an atomic drop puts DiBiase on the floor. I could watch DiBiase fall over the top all day. He was always great at falling over and made it look like a science.

Back in and Jim clotheslines him down before pounding away a bit more. DiBiase charges into a boot in the corner and hits a middle rope ax handle for two. Duggan comes back with a sunset flip of all things for two and to give Jesse a shock. A suplex puts DiBiase down and he jumps into a punch in the ribs to slow him down even more. Duggan slams him down but Andre trips him before the three point clothesline can be launched. Jim looks at Andre but gets caught in the back by a knee, sending DiBiase to the quarterfinals.

Rating: C-. DiBiase’s flipping was a good touch and they got to do some decent stuff in less than five minutes. That’s one of the problems with tonight’s show: since there are so many matches they have to keep things short. Duggan would eventually feud with Andre in some surprisingly decent matches.

Gene is with Brutus and while looking him up and down says “Brutus this is incredible what a package.” After that unintentional comedy, Gene asks Brutus if he’s worried about Jimmy Hart interfering in the IC Title match tonight. Brutus says Hart will get a haircut if he intereferes.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Dino Bravo vs. Don Muraco

Bravo shoves him back into the corner to start to win the first power battle of the match. Muraco hammers him down and tries something like a Vader Bomb but basically just lands next to Bravo instead. Dino comes back with an elbow to the face and a gutwrench suplex for no cover. A knee in the corner misses Muraco so he starts hammering on the knee.

A spinning toehold has Bravo in trouble but Don gets kicked away and gets his head caught in the ropes. Dino uses Muraco’s own piledriver to get two but a second attempt is countered with a backdrop. They clothesline each other but it’s Muraco up first. He hits a flying forearm which works so well that he tries it again, but Bravo pulls the referee into Muraco for the DQ.

Rating: D+. this was slow and plodding but it wasn’t horrible. Muraco was far better when he was less muscular and evil and this part of his career never quite worked that well. One very nice thing here is Jesse freaking out when Bravo got disqualified but then saying it was correct when seeing Bravo pull the referee on the replay. It’s very refreshing to see something like that.

Bob Uecker warns Honky Tonk Man about getting beaten up by Brutus. Honky makes fun of Uecker’s batting average and threatens to backstroke up the Mississippi River. Uecker: “You guys ain’t never coming to my house!”

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Greg Valentine vs. Ricky Steamboat

Should be good. Steamboat brings the future Richie Steamboat to the ring with him in matching outfits. Feeling out process to start with Steamboat taking him down via an armdrag. Gorilla says Ricky has excellence of execution to coin a phrase. A few shoulders get two on Valentine so he throws Steamboat over the top. That of course doesn’t work on the Dragon so he comes back with a dropkick and a crucifix for two.

Valentine comes back with his usual elbows and forearms to put Steamboat down. He pulls Steamboat off the ropes so Ricky drops onto the back of his head. This allows Gorilla to bust out the term “external occipital protuberance”, to which Jesse replies “THE WHAT?” The voice Ventura says that in is hilarious. Apparently it’s that little bump on the back of your head. Steamboat reverses a suplex into one of his own and hooks an armbar. Jimmy Hart goes a rant of instructions to the Hammer which is such a lost art in wrestling.

Steamboat gets dropped on the back of his head, allowing for another discussion of whatever that thing is called. Gorilla: “External occipital protuberance.” Jesse: “Oh ok. Back of the head for all you normal people back there.” Valentine pounds away with elbows as Gorilla says they’re “right in the kisser, right between the eyes.” His biology knowledge is all over the place. Donald Trump is in the front row. Steamboat comes back with some chops for two but Greg puts him right back down with a gutbuster.

Valentine goes after the leg but the Figure Four is broken up. They chop it out with Steamboat taking over, only to charge into a boot in the corner. Valentine hits a top rope forearm but still can’t put the Figure Four on. Steamboat hits an elbow to the face and a top rope chop for two. He rams Valentine into the corner ten times and shoves the referee away when he tries to break it up. Ricky goes up and hits the cross body but Valentine rolls through to eliminate Steamboat.

Rating: C+. Like I said, decent stuff here although Steamboat would be gone pretty much immediately over wanting to take some time off. Vince said no so Ricky left wrestling for about nine months. Anyway, good stuff here from two guys that know how to work whatever kind of a match you ask them to. Valentine was great in a role like this where he wasn’t going to win anything but he could fill in a spot and do just fine.

Steamboat waves goodbye to the crowd so yeah this was it for him.

The British Bulldogs with their recently returned dog Matilda declare her a weasel dog for their six man against the Islanders and Heenan. Oh and Koko is here too.

Bobby Heenan gets a package and actually tips the delivery guy. Ok then.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Randy Savage vs. Butch Reed

Macho and Liz come out in matching blue and Liz really is beautiful. She’s also one of the few females in wrestling that stayed classy (until Russo got ahold of her) for almost her entire run. This is power vs. speed with Reed getting Savage in the corner early on. Jesse asks Gorilla if he would buy a car from Slick (Reed’s manager). Gorilla says no. Jesse: “Not even a bright blue Caddy?” These two are just freaking fun together. They knew how to work off each other so well and it made the late 80s a ton of fun.

Reed pounds away on Savage and guillotines him on the top rope and out to the floor. Back in and Butch stomps on Randy a bit before elbowing him right back down. Savage gets in a kick to the face and fires off some punches, only to get clotheslined down again. Reed goes up top but takes WAY too long to jaw at Liz, allowing Savage to slam him down and drop the elbow for the pin. The pop when Savage hits the elbow is HUGE. You could hear it starting lasts year in Detroit and now it’s full fledged here.

Rating: C-. This was basically a squash until the very end. Savage was great at building up sympathy from the crowd which is why the pops were so huge when he won here. Reed would also head to the NWA soon after this to do nothing for a year before joining Doom. Not much to see here but again, the time crunch hurts things a lot.

Uecker talks about trying to get with Vanna White tonight when Heenan and the Islanders come in. Heenan: “You talk about writing letters. You had 700,000 votes for the Hall of Fame. You would have had more but you ran out of stamps. Heenan isn’t worried about the six man later.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. One Man Gang

Gang pounds away in the corner to start and Bigelow is in trouble. This is one of those big guys that pound away on each other with basic stuff but it looks better because they’re huge matches. Bigelow comes back with a forearm and a low splash for two. Bam Bam pounds away and hits a headbutt and then about four more to take over. He hits the ropes and Slick pulls the rope down though and Gang pounds on him on the apron enough to cause a countout. Too short to rate but this was lame. I think Bigelow had a bad knee here too.

Hogan goes into one of his most bizarre and over the top promos here. He talks about slamming Andre and breaking the United States in half, sending Andre and his next two opponents into the ocean. The rest if going to be nearly verbatim because a description won’t do it justice. Talking about them falling into the ocean:

And so will Donald Trump and all the Hulkamaniacs, but as Donald Trump hangs on to the top of the Trump Plaza with his family under his other arm, and as they sink to the bottom of the sea, THANK GOD Donald Trump is a Hulkamaniac. He’ll know enough to let go of his materialistic possessions, hang onto the wife and kids and dog paddle all the way to safety. But Donald, if somehow you run out of gas, and all the Hulkamaniacs happen to run out of gas, just hang onto the largest back in the world and I’ll dog paddle and backstroke (wouldn’t the people on his back drown?) all of us to safety.”

So Hogan has just declared himself Jesus. You knew it was coming eventually.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts

This is part of a BIG feud over Rude trying to get with Jake’s wife. Jake immediately goes for the part of Rude’s body that would mess with Rude the most: his face. Rude comes back with a slam and some right hands so Jake comes back with some slams of his own. Rude winds up in the corner with the snake and bails right into an arm wringer by Jake. Try as he might, Rude can’t fight out of the wristlock as it’s pretty clear this is going to last for awhile.

The hold is finally broken by Rude putting him on the top rope but Jake comes off the middle rope with a jumping knee lift to send Rick to the outside. Rude gets slammed again but this time the knee lift misses and Rick stomps away. Rick drops a knee and gets a VERY slow two count. We hit the chinlock and I open a book because we’re going to be here for a long time.

After about two minutes, Rude hits a token clothesline before hooking the chinlock all over again. Jake tries to fight back but gets launched into the head and dropped on his face. A top rope fist to a downed Jake gets two and it’s back to the chinlock. You can hear the fans booing now. Roberts tries a belly to back suplex but Rude still doesn’t break the hold.

Now the boring chants begin so Jake FINALLY hits a jawbreaker to get out of the hold and get the crowd going a bit. The short clothesline looks to set up the DDT but Rude rams him into the corner. Jake is suplexed out of a headlock for two and both guys are down. Rude tries a pin with his feet on the ropes and the time runs out. The fans are NOT happy with that one.

Rating: D-. What in this is supposed to be appealing? We don’t get a DDT, we don’t get any comeuppance for Rude, we don’t get a winner, and we don’t even get a beating for Heenan. This was long and very dull with at least five minutes out of fifteen being spent in a chinlock. If you need to have two guys get eliminated to prevent another match later, wouldn’t it make sense to have this one go fast instead of going the time limit?

Gene and Vanna White look at the brackets so we’ll do that too.

Hogan

Andre

DiBiase

Muraco

Savage

Valentine

One Man Gang

BYE

Vanna has no idea who Bob Uecker is but she wants Hogan to win.

Hercules vs. Ultimate Warrior

They collide to start as the announcers recap the tournament. Hercules hits three straight clotheslines to put Warrior down to Jesse’s amazement. Warrior fires off some chops but gets backdropped out to the floor. They brawl on the floor for a bit as Heenan is reaching in his pockets. Both guys head back inside and pound on each other a little bit more with Warrior hitting the ten punches in the corner. Hercules comes out of the corner with an atomic drop and sends Warrior into the corner chest first. He puts on the full nelson but Warior climbs the corner and falls back ala Bret and Austin at Survivor Series 96 for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. Warrior was rapidly becoming a force but it wouldn’t be another six months before he finally hit something special. Hercules would be around for a few more years but would never do anything of note. This was just a filler match to bridge the gap between the first and second rounds of the tournament.

We recap Hogan vs. Andre, which I’m sure you know the story of, at least up to Mania III. After that, Andre disappeared for the summer until leading his team to victory over Hogan’s team at the first Survivor Series (Hogan was counted out). So anyway DiBiase debuted and wanted to buy the world title but Hogan of course said no. DiBiase instead bought Andre from Heenan and said go get me the belt.

This led us to Indianapolis and the first Main Event, which completely destroyed every ratings record ever for wrestling, drawing a mind blowing 15 rating and 33 million viewers live on NBC on a Friday night. Today, 5 million people watching Raw is reasons for a celebration for Raw. Anyway, there was a screwjob finish with Dave Hebner’s twin brother Earl debuting as an imposter and counting a pin while Hogan’s shoulder was clearly up. Andre gave the title to DiBiase which didn’t fly with President Jack Tunney, so the title was held up and we got the tournament to settle things.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Andre the Giant vs. Hulk Hogan

Hulk charges into the ring but gets stomped down. DiBiase and Virgil are here in Andre’s corner. Hogan gets rammed into the corner and punched down by the giant but Hogan comes back with some forearms. He has to stop to beat up DiBiase and ram Ted and Andre’s heads together. Hogan chops Andre into the ropes and gets him tied up. DiBiase frees the arms but Hogan punches Andre down and drops some elbows, but the giant grabs him by the throat from the mat and takes over again.

Some standing choking ensues and Hogan goes down to his knees. That gets shifted into a nerve hold but Hogan fights up and fires away on Andre even more but can’t drop him. Hogan goes for a slam but DiBiase hits him in the back as Virgil distracts the referee. Hulk gets the chair away and hits Andre with the chair. Andre gets the chair away and hits Hulk with it, somehow drawing a double DQ despite Hogan clearly hitting Andre first.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t much from a quality standpoint but they were at a far faster pace than they were last year. That’s probably the right idea given how messed up Andre’s body was at this point though. Anyway, this is all part of the Master Plan which we’ll hear more about later on. Not a terrible match but it’s really just there to say it happened.

Hogan chases Virgil and DiBiase down with the former getting suplexed in the aisle. Hulk goes back in and slams Andre before posing for a few minutes despite not winning the match. It’s still going. He didn’t pose this much at last year’s show.

Savage and Liz (now in pink) say that Hogan was cheated and that he’s never been defeated. Oh and Macho is going to win.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Don Muraco vs. Ted DiBiase

The winner goes to the finals because of the double DQ. Ted comes out alone here for the first time tonight. Muraco pulls him into the ring by the hair and we’re ready to go. A quick powerslam gets two and Ted is reeling. There’s a clothesline for another two and Ted tries to bail. DiBiase finally gets to the floor and Billy Graham (Muraco’s manager) tries to hit him with his cane. Back in and Don tries to pull him out of the corner but gets pulled into the corner himself instead. DiBiase finally has some control but misses a falling reverse elbow off the middle rope. Muraco makes a quick comeback but walks into a hotshot for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but yet again the time hurts them a lot. There’s only so much you can do in about five minutes, although it was good to show that DiBiase could get a win on his own which he did here. Muraco would be gone pretty soon if I remember correctly. Not much of a match here but it wasn’t bad.

Demolition talks about hitting people over the head with ball bats and say they’ll win the titles.

One Man Gang’s bye is announced.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Randy Savage vs. Greg Valentine

Savage takes over quickly with a slam and a knee drop for two but Valentine comes back with a pair of forearms, the second from the top rope. A shoulderbreaker gets two for Valentine and it’s time for some more elbows. Greg throws him to the floor and rams Randy into the barricade a few times. More elbows to the head and chest follow as Savage is in a lot of trouble.

Back in and Valentine starts in on the leg but Savage quickly grabs a rope. A suplex gets two for Valentine and Randy is in trouble. All of a sudden Savage goes NUTS (he’s fine then) and pounds away on Hammer with the top rope ax handle. He loads up another one but they kind of collide instead. Savage misses a charge at the ropes and Valentine tries the Figure Four again, only to get rolled up for the pin to advance Savage.

Rating: B-. It’s the best match of the tournament so far but that’s not saying much. Also it’s one of the longer matches of the tournament at just over six minutes so that probably has something to do with it. Savage took a beating in this but managed to sneak out with a win which is always cool to see. The fans continue to pop huge for him too which is a great sign.

Vanna White has no idea who Bob Uecker is. We look at the updated brackets:

Ted DiBiase

BYE

Randy Savage

One Man Gang

Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Brutus Beefcake

Sherri Martel is with Honky as Peggy Sue here which is a pretty amazing character change for her. This is during Honky’s insanely long run that drew a ton of money and is pretty awesome all around. Brutus hits a quick atomic drop and messes with Honky’s hair to play with his mind a bit. Honky bails to the floor as Jesse and Gorilla debate crooked referees. Back in and Beefcake rams Honky’s head into the buckle a few times as this is one sided so far.

A high knee sends the champion back to the floor but once back in, Beefcake gets caught by a shot to the stomach. Honky takes over and stomps away which is about the extent of his offense. He loads up the Shake Rattle and Roll but drops it and goes back to stomping. Honky tries it again but Brutus grabs the rope to block it. Beefcake pounds away a bit and grabs his sleeper but Jimmy knocks out the referee. Honky gets knocked but but there’s no referee so Brutus celebrates like an idiot. Brutus cuts Jimmy Hart’s hair for fun and Honky walks out. It’s a DQ I think.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as this show is just going WAY too long at this point. We’re only about two and a half hours into it and we’ve got four matches left. Brutus was just another guy in there to not get the title off Honky, which adds him to a list of about 10 guys who couldn’t do it. Honky would get his soon enough though.

In a semi-famous bit, Andre talks about DiBiase paying him to eliminate Hogan (not really a surprise) and then chokes Bob Uecker.

Islanders/Bobby Heenan vs. British Bulldogs/Koko B. Ware

There’s actually a story here. Heenan comes to the ring in a dog handlers’ outfit (remember the package from earlier?) because Matilda, the dog mascot of the Bulldogs, is back from being dognapped, presumably by the Islanders. Koko is there because when you need a filler, you call Koko B. Ware. We start with Dynamite vs. Tama but it’s quickly off to Haku vs. Davey Boy for a nice power match.

Davey slams him down a few times and it’s off to a quickly broken chinlock. Back to Tama who is gorilla pressed up and down and it’s back to Haku. Jesse: “Heenan seems to be saving himself.” Gorilla: “Yeah for the senior prom.” Did Gorilla just make a sex joke? I can feel my childhood crumbling as I type this. Koko comes in for some quick shots but it’s back to Dynamite for the clothesline that Benoit copied from him.

The Kid charges into a kick in the corner and here’s Heenan for the first time. He stomps on Dynamite, gets hit once in his padded suit, and runs away. That’s about what I expected. Tama tries a Vader Bomb but hits knees, allowing for another tag to Koko. He pounds on both Islanders but Haku takes him right back down. Tama comes in with a top rope chop and Heenan gets his second tag. Heenan chokes a bit but misses a charge into the post. Everything breaks down and the Islanders drop Heenan onto Koko for the pin.

Rating: C. I told you Koko was worthless in this. The stuff with the tag teams was pretty solid but the rest of it was as dull as you would expect. These six man tags with the Bulldogs in there don’t go that well for them but this was their last try at it. This was basically a comedy match and it was only kind of funny.

Jesse Ventura is introduced to the crowd for some posing.

Ted DiBiase’s bye is announced.

WWF World Title Tournament Semifinals: One Man Gang vs. Randy Savage

Savage and Liz are in black for this one. Randy tries to lock up with him to start which isn’t his best play here. Gang shoves him into the corner and pounds him down then does it again for a few more minutes. A pair of splashes miss and an elbow sends Gang into the ropes and out to the floor. Savage tries a slam but gets choked down instead. Liz gets on the apron for no apparent reason as Slick throws in the cane, but Gang gets caught swinging it for the DQ.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here and Savage on defense can’t save most of a match. This is the second win over a Slick client of the night and he would spend the summer feuding with more of them. Gang was a decent big man but at the end of the day he was just another monster for a hero to vanquish. Not that there’s anything wrong with that as people can make a great living like that, especially in the 80s.

Savage gets hit with the cane anyway but he still comes back and sends Gang into Slick.

The finals are DiBiase vs. Savage.

Bob Uecker can’t catch up with Vanna.

Tag Titles: Demolition vs. Strike Force

Strike Force is one of my favorite teams ever and is comprised of Rick Martel and Tito Santana. They had been champions for something like five months and are still considered transitional champions. Smash and Martel start things off and the former lives up to his namesake by beating Rick down. Everything breaks down quickly for a bit and the result is the champions in control. Tito comes in to work over the arm of Ax before it’s off to Smash for more arm cranking.

Demolition comes back with a standing Hart Attack before it’s back to Ax for a powerslam. Smash suplexes Tito down for two but an elbow drop misses. Ax comes back in and gets caught out of nowhere by the flying forearm (Jesse: “He learned that in the Mexican Football League.”). There’s the hot tag to Martel and it’s dropkicks a go-go. The Boston Crab goes on Smash but Tito goes after Ax. The forearm takes him down but Fuji slides in the cane. Rick gets blasted in the back of the head, giving Demolition their first titles. They would hold those belts for over a year and a half.

Rating: C+. Power vs. speed is always a good combination and that’s what you got here. Demolition was a pair of guys who beat the tar out of everyone they fought and that’s what they did here. It took a pair of Horsemen to get the belts off of them if that tells you anything about how awesome they were.

Robin Leech brings out the WWF Title belt.

Bob Uecker is guest ring announcer. Vanna White is guest timekeeper and she gives Bob a kiss.

WWF World Title: Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase

Savage and Liz are now in white and Andre is with DiBiase. Macho blocks some punches in the corner but Andre trips him up like a jerk. Andre does it again and Savage is catching on that he’s got a problem. They trad some cranking on the arm and DiBiase’s sunset flip doesn’t work. A clothesline gets two for Randy and he sends DiBiase to the floor where Andre says go ahead and jump.

Realizing he’s in trouble, Savage sends Liz to the back the obvious reason (hint: the fans are chanting HOGAN). DiBiase hooks a chinlock and heeeeeeeeeeeere’s Hulk. The look on Hogan’s face and his jaws going all over the place make him look high as a kite. Ted pounds away in the corner and Andre pulls Savage to the outside. Hogan jumps the giant but Savage is in big trouble.

A gutwrench suplex gets two for Ted but he goes up top for reasons of general stupidity, earning that slam off the top by Savage. Randy tries a quick elbow but only hits the mat. DiBiase puts on the Million Dollar Dream but Hogan, ever the hero, comes in and whacks DiBiase in the bak with a chair. Savage runs to the top and the big elbow gives him his first world title.

Rating: B-. This was a decent match and the place went NUTS for the win, but they were both really tired and it slowed them down a lot. The Hogan cheating wasn’t really necessary and it made Savage look a bit weak, but at the end of the day it didn’t make that big of a difference. Still though, huge moment here.

Hogan insists on being in the ring for the celebration which really takes something away from it. The three celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. The moment at the end is huge, but the time it took getting there isn’t worth it. The problem with this show is that it’s WAY too long and there aren’t that many good matches on it. Sixteen matches are WAY too many to have on a single show and the fans were really burned out by the end. This should have been an eight man tournament with some slightly longer matches. Also this show is almost four hours long and the talent pool just wasn’t deep enough to support that back then. Nostalgia is really all that helps this show for most modern fans, but that’s not a terrible thing.

Ratings Comparison

Battle Royal

Original: C

Redo: D+

Ted DiBiase vs. Jim Duggan

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Don Muraco vs. Dino Bravo

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Greg Valentine vs. Ricky Steamboat

Original: C

Redo: C+

Randy Savage vs. Butch Reed

Original: D

Redo: C-

One Man Gang vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts

Original: D

Redo: D-

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules

Original: D

Redo: D+

Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant

Original: C

Redo: C-

Ted DiBiase vs. Don Muraco

Original: C+

Redo: C

Randy Savage vs. Greg Valentine

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Brutus Beefcake vs. Honky Tonk Man

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Islanders/Bobby Heenan vs. British Bulldogs/Koko B. Ware

Original: D+

Redo: C

Randy Savage vs. One Man Gang

Original: D

Redo: D

Demolition vs. Strike Force

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: D

About the same more or less.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/11/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-4-one-big-tournament-and-thats-it/

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